Are You Being Too Picky In Dating? Here's Our Solution

Summary

Are you too picky when it comes to finding YOUR ideal partner? Well in this week's episode, Abby chats with a fellow matchmaker, Gabby Aratow about attraction and how you could even change your "type" that you're attracted to. They share important relationship advice for people looking for a relationship such as how to be more inclusive when dating and how to step beyond conventional beauty standards when looking for your ideal partner since online dating has made us judgmental in dating. They also go over their experiences as matchmakers and what collaboration between matchmakers looks like. 

Who this Episode is Great For

This insight is valuable for people that are single and in relationships alike who want to start doing self-reflection on how they operate in relationships and how to improve on themselves. This episode is great for people that are looking to broaden their horizons and be more open-minded when dating. People recently noticed that they don't swipe right too often. Instead, they find themselves looking through your potential matches on your dating apps and audibly saying, "No, thanks," as you swipe left. It's OK to not feel a connection, but for those wondering: why are you so selective in your relationships?

Links and Resources

Head to  https://keeperintros.com/get-started to get in Gabby's Matchmaking Data Base today!

Like what you hear?  Leave a review and give us a follow on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Stitcher, iHeartRadio, or any of your other favorite platforms!

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Transcript

Abby  0:01  
Hi, I'm Abby Rosenblum founder of the social modern matchmaking, and your host of ghosted, a podcast about making dating easy and fun again, so you can find your booth. Get it? We'll talk with dating experts, coaches and real clients of mine and single people from around the world. Stick around for corny jokes, dating advice and deep dives into the psychology behind finding love.

Welcome to another episode of ghosted where we talk about all things modern dating all the struggles we give advice, all the things and today I have a another fellow matchmaker with me I am super excited to have Gabby are a towel with me from keeper introduction services. She is actually pretty close by to me over in Aspen, thanks for being here. 

Gabby  0:50  
Thanks for having me. Matchmaker, Abby. 

Abby  0:53  
I know we're a matchmaker, Abby and Gabby has a great ring to it right? 

Gabby  0:57  
It does. It does. I love it. 

Abby  0:59  
 So just to kick this off, I know that people who listen to my podcast probably have an idea of what matchmaking is, I would hope by now we're on who knows what episode at this point. But why don't you give a little intro on your business, how it works, and a little bit more on how you got started and matchmaking. 

Gabby  1:18  
Okay, great people hire me to conduct a search for them. For the right romantic partner. It's almost a little like being a real estate agent in certain ways. I like to say to people, I'm a human real estate agent. And I try to find people a human home. So people come to me and they talk about their life circumstances and what they're interested in for a romantic partner. For me, they purchase a package of introductions, I really never do just one because it takes a little bit of time to sometimes work with a client and figure out exactly how to adjust things or make things right. And then I start to conduct a search for those people. That also generally includes a period of what I would call setting expectations correctly. I mean, I when I hear what my client wants, because I spend my whole day in the in the dating field, I really understand if what they're asking for is something that I think they're going to be able to to essentially formulate a relationship with or not. So we might go through a period where I adjust a little bit around reality. And then once that happens, I start looking for the right candidates. When I find those candidates, I set them up on the dates and they get to sort of see who they naturally click with. And that's how I run my business. I started with a national company last July, I left that company and opened my own service kiss keeper introduction services, you can find us at keeper interest calm and also enter our free database there. And it's been really wonderful to be able to be my own boss and to kind of do things my own way. And as far as starting, you know, I think many matchmakers probably you as well. We're sort of natural connectors, we've always been connecting people in some fashion. I remember in high school and in college, I was always saying, oh, Nikki, you should meet john or whatever. And then I discovered many years later that this was actually a profession. And I could do this full time and get paid for it. So that's when I when I started, which was really just kind of randomly and then I've just been off and running ever since I've been doing this for five years now. 

Abby  3:29  
  That's awesome. And I know we got connected and I was super excited to just connect with another matchmaker. And it's kind of interesting in our world that I had another matchmaker on the podcast, in the earlier episodes, that people do collaborate, you know, we were even chatting about what am i clients earlier this week, and I was seeing him like, Hey, who do you have for her? So it's a really cool industry in that the majority of people are really supportive of one another's businesses. 

Gabby  3:59  
I mean, during any normal work day, I am probably in contact with at least three other matchmakers on that day. You're You're the third already today that I have other matchmakers that I've been in touch with. So for me, it's hugely collaborative. We really do need each other and support each other. So yeah, if I have a client, maybe you have the right fit for the client, I might call you up and say, who do you have might be good for this client. And as happened this week, you did the very same thing for me and said, Hey, you texted me pictures actually and said, Hey, this is my client. By the way, just to let you know, people listening that when matchmakers show each other pictures, they're always completely confidential unless we get permission from the client themselves. So I never show pictures and I expect other matchmakers to never show pictures, but it helps us when we're helping our fellow matchmakers pick the correct potential candidates for that client. So you sent me a couple pictures and I had someone that I thought might actually be a nice match for her. 

Abby  4:58  
I know and we need to chat about that.  After doing some research, he sounds pretty great.

So yeah, I think it's really cool. I mean, obviously, I have run into a few people that are a little resistant to the collaboration. Have you had any experiences like that? Obviously, I don't want to talk badly about anybody. But I'm just kind of curious

Gabby  5:19  
Well, not to name names, because I won't do that. But I went a few years ago, there was a matchmaker, I was working for a national company. And there was a matchmaker who wanted to sort of poach me from that company and have me start recruiting for her. And then I said, No, and then she and I started to potentially match a client to client match, which was a match of her client and it match of my client. And we didn't really come to the right terms about how we were going to do it. And then she wrote some really nasty stuff about me on Facebook, and I couldn't believe it. I've never ever had another matchmaker do something like that, where she just said some just unquestionably things for not even business related, not even business related. And, of course, I blocked her from Facebook, and then I've subsequently found out that she just has a terrible reputation for being pretty terrible to a lot of people. So I will not collaborate with her. And I know other people who also won't collaborate with her, I would say largely 90% 95% of the matchmakers that I've met, and I've been to the matchmaking Institute and spoken at the matchmaking Institute, we really know that we need each other. Yeah, we need each other and we like each other.

Abby  6:39  
It's a pretty cool concept. I mean, you think that people who become matchmakers are obviously social butterfly types super extroverted? Probably a bit type A I can, everybody I can see we're all on the same wavelength there.

Gabby  6:52  
Yeah, we are. And we genuinely I think there's, it's, it's almost an instinct of really wanting to help people. And we we kind of understand that in each other. And sometimes I have I don't know if anyone's out there has ever watched Say Yes to the Dress, of course, being a matchmaker, I kind of love that show a little bit. It's the next phase, right? But I always, I feel like when when they take the cameras of Say Yes to the Dress, and they go down in the basement, and they're they're going through all of these wedding dresses going through all these? And it's like, well, I don't know, I need a rouched mermaid tool with a bleeding. You know, do you know I know of when I know of one. And I sort of feel like we live all day in that state where we're really trying to find the right fit. And we really want to make the client happy. And we're turning to each other saying, Have you seen something like this? Can you point me in the right direction? So there's a there's a kind of an urgency in our instincts to help one another? Because we we all want to make our clients happy. And we understand wanting to make our clients happy?

Abby  7:57  
Totally. I mean, I think that's the number one thing is we want to spread the love is the common theme and wanted to I just had an interesting question that came up in my mind of people come to me all the time with very unrealistic realistic requests. What are some examples of things you've been seeing lately of people having unrealistic expectations, anything interesting, you could share,

Gabby  8:19  
I would say that the two major ones that I regularly come across is I see women who have not paid much attention to fitness, and they might even have maybe 100 or 150 pounds to lose. And what they're asking for is a man who looks like he should be modeling for you know, a male fitness model magazine. I don't think that that's realistic. I don't think that if you yourself have an enormous amount of weight to lose, that what you're going to necessarily attract is a guy who spends five hours in the gym and is real in that that you're going to be what he's looking for. I've seen that theme a lot on the other theme I see. And I think almost all matchmakers contend with this is just having to do with age. And typically it's it's men asking for significantly younger women, the statistics show I love there's a book out there called data journalism, and it's written by Christian Rutter, and he founded OkCupid. And he took 20 years of data from OkCupid and published a fascinating book that I've read twice, of course, because it's in my industry, and I just love it. But according to the data on OkCupid, over the course of a woman's lifetime, she'll go from liking men slightly older. So if you're like a 25 year old woman, you might be interested in a 27 year old man, and by the time she's gotten into her 40s, so you're a 47 year old woman, you're interested in a man slightly younger, so let's call it a 45 year old man, and that's what you consider to be the ideal age men just keep expanding the age differential that they're interested in. So a lot of times I have men coming to me who maybe are 6465 and they they They're really interested in dating someone 35. And in their mind, she's a full grown adult, she's a full fledged human. She's not a child, he's not doing anything creepy, but in his mind, but most 35 year old women, especially if they have, you know, a lot of sensation, ality and things going on for themselves. That's not the age that they're interested in dating or even close. So there's just a lot of kind of adjusting around reality with age. Do you find the same Abby?

Abby  10:32  
Oh, yeah, you know, and it's, you know, what I run into most is like, there's this whole kind of dichotomy, I guess it would be the best way to describe it were women who are like late 30s, early 40s, you know, a lot of them want to date a certain age, but then that age of men doesn't really want to date them, you know, what you were kind of talking about is that age of men wants to date like way younger. So there's kind of this disconnect, where I'd like come on people just like, you know, date and age, that's reasonable for you. Of course, there are exceptions from my own experiences, you know, people can of course, date someone half their age, and it can be totally fine. But usually, it seems like there's a weird dynamic, or some sort of issue that maybe should be talked out with a with a therapist, when you really are seeking that much of an age difference.

Gabby  11:23  
Yeah. And I think there's a lot of excuses around why people want that age difference. So often, I'll say, Why do you want to be dating somebody 25 years younger, and then it's, well, I'm so fit, and I do Eight Mile hikes on the weekends, and I have such younger friends, All my friends are so much younger, I hear the same excuse in the same excuses over and over again. And they don't know that that's the 100th time I've heard somebody say that. But the truth of the matter is your pier does exist. The woman who is roughly around your age, and also goes for Eight Mile hikes on the weekend does exist. So do you? Is it really about the excuse? Or is it really about something else? And that becomes the question. Now, look, dating is this huge marketplace, and you're allowed to go into the marketplace and be 65 or 70, and try to date 30-year-old women go for it. It's not illegal? No, you're not committing a crime. But I do think you're going to find yourself incredibly frustrated at the lack of response. And so ultimately, people sort of need to adjust if they want to have effectiveness and efficiency, you know, it just it years are going to go by while you're trying to date someone 30 years, you're Junior, and then you're going to turn around and now you're going to be 75. And you probably in those five years may not have actually gotten on a date with anybody. So I think you know, you have to adjust to the reality that works for you. And the other thing is, youth is a wonderful thing. We all love youth, it's very prized in our society. And it's considered it's often aligned with attractiveness. But in my world, and in my heart, youth is not the most attractive thing. I like women and men with wisdom. I like women and men with depth. And you know, for me, I would I think you do yourself a great service in the dating world by trying to adjust the beauty in the eye of the beholder. Who is you to try to see value in another way. And the value is someone who's lived through life experience, who has interesting stories to tell who maybe is your peer group who can reference the same general Rachel references that you that you have, those things are very valuable in terms of creating an emotional bond?

Abby  13:51  
Oh, 100%. So I definitely have a very tough time working with people who are so focused on looks, obviously, you have to have physical attraction. But when I found people who really hit it off, you know, those people are just authentically themselves, whether that's their goofy side, their nerdy side, the side where they just want to have deep conversations about life thing that is what has been consistently having people you know, start successful relationships is when sure you have to be physically attracted to the person, you're going to have sex with this person, you need to think they're attractive, but when you can be confident in your authentic self, you know, I think that is like taking it to a whole nother level.

Gabby  14:30  
You know, I agree with you so much. And I also think what's interesting is that I believe you can harness a little bit of power around what you find attractive, and I'll give you an example. We live in a world of Instagram, and everybody can agree that Instagram models are attractive. I myself, I really like art and I have been to many wonderful cities in the world to visit their art museums, including, you know, the Tate in London and the Prado in Spain. And I will walk through the rooms. And you know, I love these old oil paintings, where everyone's into like really roughly collars. And sometimes they're in these kinds of regal gowns, and maybe they're painted with big pearls on a tiara or an earring or whatever. And I've spent a lot of my life looking at art like this. And what's interesting to me now is I can be out on a date with a man. And instead of trying to ask myself what he would look like on Instagram, I kind of dress him up in my mind into one of these very noble paintings. And I see my date in the nobility that he would have if he were in the Tate, and he were dressed in this velvet cloak. And I will tell you, it's changed my taste in men's looks, it's actually changed my taste. And so my message to people is, I know it sounds crazy. And I know it sounds hard. But you actually can change what you find attractive yourself. And you can make your your life a little bit easier, or maybe even a lot easier, by you know, not expecting to date somebody who looks what every single other person on the planet calls attractive, you can formulate your own sensibility of what attractive is, and go for those people.

Abby  16:27  
I know, it's so true. We're like, so people were just taught to think like the Kardashian look is like, that's what's hot, only those women are attractive. So I really like that. That's a super interesting take. And you know, how did you was it just the whole kind of thing of picturing someone in one of those paintings is how you changed how you approach attractiveness? Or what else went into that?

Gabby  16:50  
Yeah, I mean, I, I started sort of, you know, playing around with the idea that we're in the world of beauty in the eye of the beholder that that beauty itself was dynamic, and that that beauty itself could change over time. And for me, it has I mean, I found with myself, and sometimes some of my girlfriends, that we might start dating the guy who we wouldn't necessarily consider to be our ideal of attractiveness. But after maybe that relationship is over, we realize that we go out into the world and start noticing people who looked like that guy and find them very attractive. This can happen a lot with things like race. I mean, if you have, for example, never dated an Asian man, and you've never, and you've always said to yourself, oh, well, you know, I'm not into this race, or I'm not into Latino women, or whatever it is. And then suddenly, you meet one, and you're like, Well, you know, they're kind of nice. And then you start dating them. And then suddenly, you're, you're like, oh, my god, they're smoking hot. And then you believe that relationship. And then suddenly, like, every asian guy, you see is smoking hot to you. So, you know, I do think that it changes, it changes with our maturity, it changes with our experiences, and it changes even things like I described, like you have the power to potentially reframe, or revisit attractiveness. But I still, on some basic level, yeah, you're going to be getting naked with this person, going to bed with them waking up with them, and you should like what you see, but if everything you like, looks like it should be on TV, you need to do some examination of why your tastes are so narrow.

Abby  18:31  
It's so true. I mean, I, we you and I see it all the time. And it's almost people's, it's not their fault. That's what we see. We see beautiful actors and actresses and Instagram models with their ass out whatever it is. That's where

Gabby  18:46  
I agree, I feel sort of Yeah, I feel badly for people, sometimes. I mean, I will, I'll sometimes work with a client, and they'll send me photographs of you know, what they think our ideal looks that they're interested in. And I think every single one of these people could land a modeling contract, you know, and, and then you could get angry at that client, or you could be upset with that client. But mostly, sometimes I just have a sensation of pity because I feel like we have been where we're a little bit guinea pigs in the world of television and media, in the days before billboards in the days before TV, when human beings lived differently when we lived on farms, or even before that in tribes. And maybe you lived on in a small village somewhere. 100 you know, 150 years ago, you didn't you weren't told what beauty was so clearly, all day long from so many sources, and you had probably more of an opportunity through poetry and through storytelling, you would hear about beauty, but the opportunity to develop a sense of beauty was quite individual and quite organic. And now it really isn't. It's like from the minute You open your eyes, the world is telling you this is beautiful. And this isn't beautiful. And it's not good for your dating life. It's not

Abby  20:11  
bad. It's almost the whole concept of like, you know, is beauty really in the eye of the beholder. That power of you being able to turn on what's beautiful to you is taken away, because of this world we live in. And you even think of like, let's say you do a Google search for what's the best political view, Google will give you the results that go with other things that you've been looking at. It's almost like you know, that whole confirmation bias, you get on looks, you get on all the things, you're seeing all the things, you're reading the YouTube videos that are suggested to you, we could probably go down a whole dark hole with this one.

Gabby  20:43  
Yeah, we really could. And you know, I think that it's interesting to start to ask yourself, if you have more power than you think you do over what you find attractive. And I'm not saying start dating people that you think are just really unbecoming. But I mean, start questioning where you formulated your views of attractiveness. And I agree with you, I think that in a funny way, some power has been taken from us. And my point is, you can take back the power, you can go do what I do, go visit some art museums and go play dress up in your brain. And maybe it's not the maybe it's not the noble clothing from the tape. Maybe it's from watching several episodes of Mad Men and picturing somebody in a in the 1950s and 60s and how they might have looked back then to people. So play a little bit in your own mind and use your own imagination to expand your expand your interests. Yeah, I

Abby  21:45  
mean, I think that's a really great idea. If you are listening, pay attention to this one. And if you do this, let us know what happens because I am really, really curious. I mean, I even think just growing up, you know, Orlando Bloom was my guy. I had a poster of him next to my bed. And this is not a unique story, like probably everyone. around my age, all my friends had that it was either Orlando Bloom or like the Jonas Brothers. So it's like, we're all just going after the exact Fortunately, my

Gabby  22:15  
celebrity. My celebrity crushes john oliver. He's, he's taken. But I did see him on a street once I started screaming my head off as if I had seen john lennon and I'm not easily starstruck, I worked in a talent agency for years. And I was around movie stars all day. And but I saw john oliver on the street, and I nearly lost my mind. And he came over and we chatted, and I was you know, I was just trembling with a nervousness that I was in john Oliver's presence, but I find john oliver absolutely adorable. You know, and he's, let's face it. He's pretty nerdy. I mean, I find classically handsome men good looking as well. But I can find him a kind of nerdy English journalist with a with a sarcastic sense of humor. extremely attractive.

Abby  23:07  
Oh, totally. And it's his intelligence, his humor, his personality that is maybe more attractive than his looks. But yeah, guy. Yeah, I feel like you know, he's not a he's not someone to be look at and be like, Oh,

Gabby  23:20  
you wouldn't put him on that he was. I don't think he would get on the cover of the Sexiest Man of the Year. Although he is might he might be my Sexiest Man of the Year. But that's my point. My point is, you know, if if the only people you're attracted to could be a long the sexiest people of the year cover models. Maybe you need to do a little bit more thinking about what makes you you and what makes you tick. And what could be interesting and adorable to you.

Abby  23:52  
Oh, yeah, I first see. Maybe you and I are hosting a cool workshop on this. Get people sometimes the biggest part of our job is just getting people out of their own damn way. So definitely one of those things where Yeah, you know, attractiveness and kind of the thought behind that could be a really cool thing for us to share with others too.

Gabby  24:16  
Yeah, I like that. That's I'd love to do that.

Abby  24:18  
Awesome. I know. We're just finding all kinds of ways to work together. It's the Gabby Abby hour.

Gabby  24:24  
It is it is and we're not like you said we're not that far. I'm I think I'm three hours from do so. I'm a Colorado resident, too. Although you work mainly in Colorado. I work in Colorado, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Chicago and Manhattan. So I really run my business nationally. But so I probably have maybe, you know, less than half of my clients are here based in Colorado, but I certainly have a couple as well.

Abby  24:48  
Totally. And that was one that I reached out to you for which is super awesome. But yeah, if you are listening, you know people listen, this podcast all across the country all over the world. So if you're listening And you're like, Abby only works in Colorado. Here's your answer. Gabby, how can I How can someone contact you or submit their info to your database? If they're interested? Yeah.

Gabby  25:09  
So yeah, I have a website. It's keeper intros or keeper introductions. And if you go to my website, you'll just see a little tag right there that says, you know, enter your free profile here. And you also have a free profile, right? Because I suggest that everybody, one of the nice things about coming in contact with a matchmaker, whether you're a client or not, is we all keep a networks of people that we can go to look at for our paying clients. So you can enter our network for $0 and potentially be sent out with a client. So you should go to Abby's website, you should go to my website and put your contact information in. Because you never know four months from now, you might hear from one of us, because you're a good fit for someone who came in and hired us. So it's always it always behooves you to put your information into the network if especially if it's free, which I think which mine is and I believe Abby's is put your information into our networks.

Abby  26:09  
Totally. Yeah, if you want to like officially be in my database, there is a fee, but there's no fee to just submit your info and pay if it pops up. That is a great match for someone I'm currently working with then it's still free. So

Gabby  26:22  
yeah, great. Yeah. I love it. Even if these small fees, by the way. I mean, sometimes people do pay, there is some matchmakers have a small fee like 25 or $30 or something to enter their, their network. And, you know, I think it's money well spent. Honestly, it's, it's, it's it's a little bit of a gamble, but it's an inexpensive gamble with a huge payoff.

Abby  26:43  
Totally, Tony. Yeah, I was gonna say, I don't know if I've ever even talked about joining my database or the pricing on the podcast. So okay, breaking it up. You know, if you're listening, and I know a lot of my listeners are already my clients and just want to get more information and helpful advice. But if you're listening, and you're like, hey, Abby and Gabby are speaking to me right now join our databases, we would both love to help you. Maybe we can even collaborate on someone that would be fun.

Gabby  27:09  
That would be fun. I would love that. Yeah.

Abby  27:12  
Awesome. I think this is going to be a really cool relationship for us. I'm so happy we connected and you're in Colorado and now I'm going to have to abuse you for your a free place to stay near Aspen.

Gabby  27:24  
Definitely please do come on out.

Abby  27:26  
Any other parting thoughts things you wanted to share? Anything that is important for single people to know right now?

Gabby  27:33  
Well, you call your I wondered why you called your podcast ghosted. This start around a podcast about people who were dealing with people who were ghosting them.

Abby  27:43  
Yes. So my I have one rule with my matchmaking company, no ghosting, everyone signs a contract. They agree to it because ghosting is a huge problem. It happens, you know, probably millions of times a day at the end of this episode, and at the end of every episode, we have a ghost story. So someone shares a time that they got ghosted, they may be owed up to ghosting. Has that ever happened to you? Do you have a story you want to share?

Gabby  28:11  
Yeah, you know, I always I'm always curious about the term ghosting because some people use it differently than others. For example, for me if I'm, if I'm in a chat with somebody on an online dating site, and then they just don't write me back. I don't consider that ghosting advice. If I've been on a couple of dates with someone and then I never hear from them. Probably not a first date because they're just basically saying, Hey, we had our first date and I'm not interested. But if we've gone out a handful of times and then they disappear for me, that's where ghosting begins. Yeah, I think everybody's gotten ghosted. Yeah, totally.

Abby  28:48  
Do you have a story that we could share of someone

Gabby  28:51  
who ghosted me I don't unfortunately, if it's, it's it's been a long time since something like that happened. I'm trying to think I don't have any no ghosting story comes up for me. But I will say that my attitudes around ghosting have really changed. Just generally, I've gotten more into the place of for my clients and for myself, you don't want someone who doesn't want you. And as hard as the heartbreak can feel or as disappointing as the experience can be. And as draining as the experience can be. Ultimately, the system is kind of beautiful, because it takes away somebody who shouldn't be there. And you didn't even have to do the

Abby  29:38  
work. Yeah, that's a good point. You know, someone goes to you they're giving you the 100% sign. They're not into it. Of course sometimes they come back and then maybe they ghost again.

Gabby  29:49  
Yeah, I think that's called a zombie.

Abby  29:52  
They call that a zombie. Yeah, but that is a zombie. If you need any of these dating terms, I have a whole video on my Instagram. So you can check that

Gabby  30:00  
you do. Watch that. Watch.

Abby  30:03  
So check go to modern yet. There should be a whole bunch of videos about all that on there. But yeah, I'm glad that you don't have a story to share about ghosting. That's always good.

Gabby  30:13  
Yeah, I can't think of one I know that it's happened to me because, look, let's face it, if you're out in the dating world, everything you everything happens to you, eventually, you're going to come up against fraudulence, and you're going to come up against ghosting. And you're going to come up against isms of all sort, you know, and you're going to confront this stuff. I mean, dating is like a mosh pit. It's got a, it's, it's, it's mostly fun, but there's a little bit of brutality in it as well. And you got to be you have to expect that you're going to have these things happen, and that you're strong enough and resilient enough to shake them off and come back. I mean, generally, if a really disappointing experience, like someone you've been out with a bunch of times goes to you, I think you need to give yourself at least a few days, if not, potentially a couple of weeks, and take some self care time and recover. And that's normal, and that's natural. But going out into the dating world means going out and confronting a lot of people who behave differently than you and think differently than you and that's going to ruffle feathers.

Abby  31:19  
Totally at least when you have a matchmaker, you have someone to talk to about it. And look out for your best interests. So hopefully, yeah, not a whole lot of ghosting when it comes to matchmaking. So yeah. Oh, you know, what I did want to we wanted to chat about with you is if you haven't picked up Gabby is single, you know, I do like to have everybody kind of share on here who's single. They're like, quick 32nd pitch of who they are, and who might be a good match for them.

Gabby  31:48  
Yeah, so by the way, if you would look really handsome in like nobility, costuming hung in a painting in the tape, call me. I'm just kidding. But um, let's see. So I am single, who's a good match for me. I typically look for men, I'd say about 45 to early 50s. I am quite outdoorsy and athletic as many Colorado type people are I moved here from California. So I don't know if I could to call myself. I'm not a Colorado native, but I've spent some of the last 25 years some of the year each year in Colorado. So I feel like I have some roots here. And now I officially moved here in 2020 and purchased a home. So someone who definitely likes to do things like go snowshoeing, go hiking. Let's see what else do I like? Oh, oh, the usual suspects witty, funny, charming. So that's good for me. And you know, I'm open to relocation to I'm on the tall side myself. I'm about five foot eight. And yeah, I mean, I'd love to meet the right person. And some of the reason I you know, I think Abby, who you're you're engaged, correct.

Abby  32:55  
I am. Yeah,

Gabby  32:57  
yeah. So you know, I like I think either way, you're a winner with your matchmaker because you either have someone who found somebody and then they can be sort of a beacon of light for you, or you have somebody who's in the trenches, and then they also really, really get what you're going through. So, you know, some people, some people put a lot of emphasis on whether you're the matchmaker what what the status is of the matchmaker, but I can tell you, that I I get a lot of people married, even though I've never gotten myself married, it might be a little bit of the shape of the Barefoot Shoemaker syndrome. But my not being married has never affected my business. In fact, sometimes I wonder whether it's been helpful for me because I sort of am vicariously marrying through everybody. But in any case, I am single and I am looking and I would like to get married one day, I think it'd be great. I'll do it. Maybe I could be on Say Yes to the Dress,

Abby  33:51  
right? Well, hey, you know, if you're listening to this podcast, and you're like, hey, Gabby, sounds really awesome. You guys know where to find us. You could go to my website, the social mm club, go to the goes to podcast tab and you could submit your info on there. And I can set up a date I can matchmake the matchmaker, though you know,

Gabby  34:11  
they say you get your angel wings, if you match make a matchmaker. So maybe you'll get your if you got your angel wings through me that would just that would make me very happy.

Abby  34:20  
It would also make me very happy. So hopefully, hopefully, we can make it happen. This has been so much fun. Thank you for sharing your knowledge, your wisdom with everybody and we will put all of the info in the notes for people to contact you and get in touch with you if they want to know more. Thanks for having me on.

Gabby  34:38  
It's been a pleasure.

Abby  34:38  
Awesome, big

Unknown Speaker  34:40  
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