I didn’t expect THIS after quitting alcohol (7 years sober)

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Chapters

• 0:00 Compound Interest of Sobriety
• 1:20 The Dangerous Normalization Period
• 2:49 From Vision Board to Reality
• 5:09 Staying Stopped: The Key Difference
• 6:58 The Best Is Yet To Come

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help you make stopping drinking a simple, logical and easy decision. We help you with tips, tools and strategies to start living your best life when alcohol-free. If you want to learn more about stop drinking coaching, then head over to wwwsoberclearcom. I don't know if you've ever heard of compound interest, but stopping drinking alcohol is the equivalent of compound interest in the investment world. I think Albert Einstein was known to say that compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world, and what it is is that what you invest, the profits of what you invest, you reinvest and you keep doing it, and then it's this exponential growth. And isn't that funny? Isn't that just the same as stopping drinking alcohol? See, today I wanted to make this quick video because I'm in this amazing place to really show you about the compound effects of not drinking, and I'm not here to talk about the short-term effects. I'm not here to tell you about weight loss and clarity. I want to talk to you about what happens when you stop drinking alcohol for years, not days, not weeks, not months when you stay stopped for years, because that is when the real gains happen. So when I first stopped drinking alcohol, you know the first few months they were like this honeymoon period. Right, I felt great. I had, you know, clarity, I had energy, I just felt like I was on cloud nine. I felt the best. I felt great, I had clarity, I had energy, I just felt like I was on cloud nine. I felt the best I felt in years. And that all happened to you. But then what happened is, after a few months is things started to normalize, right, I started to just feel normal, like I didn't feel great anymore, because that point of contrast of feeling terrible as a drinker and then not drinking alcohol was very nearby. So I felt great. But then, eventually, the greatness that I felt was now the new norm, right, it was the new baseline. So I stopped feeling great, I just felt normal, which was awesome. But at the same time, it's like that initial euphoria, that initial excitement had left me, and that is a dangerous time for people, because that's when they start getting this idea in their head again of you know, was it that bad? Was it really that bad? Maybe I could drink less this time, maybe I could have one or two drinks, and we know where it all ends up. And if you're in a place right now, where maybe you're debating whether to stop or you're not super far into your journey. You might be a few months, six months a year.

Speaker 1: 2:31

I want to share something with you, because it's been almost seven years for me now. And look where I am. We're in this incredible villa. You know, we've got this amazing view of the ocean. It's an infinity pool. Our bedroom is like a full glass bedroom where we wake up and it's just sick.

Speaker 1: 2:46

But I want to show you where life was when I stopped drinking alcohol. I've got a picture of the room where I lived. I'll put it on the screen right now. And this was my friend's bedroom that he had a shared house in in Oxford. He was a vicar, he was a very nice man and really helped me out when I was at ground zero. But I lived in this bedroom and I don't know if you can and there's just literally just when I stopped drinking, within the first month, I had all these pictures of who I wanted to be. I was wearing certain clothes. There's a picture of a villa that almost looks identical to this. There was a picture of a skiing trip. There was a picture of a beautiful woman and guess what? I don't want to sound cocky, right, but I've got all of these things now and you know, if I had I I don't know a golf YouTube channel, I wouldn't share my personal life.

Speaker 1: 3:36

But I want to share my personal life with you because I want you to see what happens when you stay stopped. And you know, I'm about to get married. We got engaged a month ago, which is awesome. Um, you know, that was one of my dreams was to become a husband, find an amazing wife, find a life partner, and it's just such an insane contrast, like when I was drinking alcohol. I've been with my fiance now for six years and I'd be lucky if I lasted six months with a woman.

Speaker 1: 4:06

When I'm drinking, because I'm not thinking about how I can be a good partner, I'm thinking about my drinking, I'm thinking about myself, and it's just such a crazy contrast. I mean, I my drinking, I'm thinking about myself, and it's just such a crazy contrast. I mean, I went from that room with pictures of places like this to actually living it. But the only reason why I'm here is because I stayed, stopped, right, I didn't dabble, I didn't try, I didn't, you know, go back to it, because I have no doubt that whenever I drink, right, I make a bunch of progress. Life goes well, I'm in better shape, I'm making more money and my relationships are going well. I drink, and then I dismantle everything until I hit a point where I'm like, oh, it's getting bad now, and then I start, and then I stop again, and then it goes on this cycle forever, and the only way I've been able to build anything good with my life is to stay stopped, right and listen.

Speaker 1: 4:51

I'm not saying that these past seven years that I've not drank almost seven years that I've not drank, for have been perfectly easy. I've not, I've not wanted to drink, but I've had tough times. I've had tough times where I'm like, is it really working? Like, am I doing the right things? Is life going the way that I want it to go? And that's happened countless times.

Speaker 1: 5:09

But the most important thing is that I stayed sober. I didn't drink because, right, and I've said this before but when you drink alcohol, life is like this and you can make progress like this, right, you can go on an upward trajectory with these up and down crazy cycles, but when you don't drink alcohol, it's a lot more linear, right. However, there are periods in your life where things will stagnate, where you're flatline, where you could have six months where you feel like you're making no progress. The important thing here is to not drink, because then you go back on that stupid up and down cycle. That just feels horrible, right, even if you I don't know you might be in a place now where you're doing okay in life right, you've got money, you've got a house, you've got a family but again you're doing okay in life right, you've got money, you've got a house, you've got a family but again you're living in those cycles, those up and down cycles, and it just sucks. So at least for the past seven years I've not drank. It's been a lot more linear. Yeah, sure, there've been periods, but then it's always on the way up.

Speaker 1: 6:06

And you know I'm here today and I wanted to share with you, not to show off, right? Listen, I don't care what anybody thinks of me, I'm not here to show off. I've done things where I've never posted it, on social media, where people are like why have you not posted that? I'm like because I don't do it for other people, I do it for me. But I wanted to show you this because I want to make this about you because I want you to know that when you don't drink alcohol, the life of your dreams becomes a possibility. There is no doubt in my mind that that can happen for you.

Speaker 1: 6:32

To you, this might be rubbish, this might be the last thing you want. You might just want, you know, a nice free bedroom house in a field with a little bit of an allotment, a bit more self-sustainable, and just to look after your family. If that's what you want, great. I'm not here to say that this is amazing. Maybe for you, this is like the last thing that you want, but for me, this is what I wanted. I wanted to be able to go and stay in amazing establishments. I wanted an online business. I wanted to be able to just jump on a plane when I want, and I didn't want that to impact my work. And that was my vision when I stopped drinking alcohol and it became reality.

Speaker 1: 7:05

Yeah, and I had to share it with you because, you know, stopping drinking alcohol gave me everything. It was the most important decision I made in my life and, uh, I mean, you know, if you're thinking of doing this, if you're on this journey as well, just keep at it, because it gets better and better and better. And listen, my mom went to AA and I still got a few AA sayings in my head. Um, just just from like growing up, right Cause she went since I was, you know, five-year-old or something. So I still got these little sayings in my head and she always used to say this thing she said the best is yet to come.

Speaker 1: 7:38

And I don't go to AA. I don't buy into that philosophy, but you know, there are some good things about it. I'm not going to lie, and this idea that when you don't drink alcohol, the best is yet to come is so true. This place I've been in this is the best establishment I've ever stayed in, and I've stayed in some pretty cool places over the years, but this is number one. So I'm thinking how am I going to top this? But then something better always happens as long as I don't drink, right? But yeah, keep it going, guys. Love you all and we'll speak soon. Thanks for checking out the Stop Drinking Podcast by Sober Clear. If you want to learn more about how we work with people to help them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit wwwsoberclearcom.