Alcohol feels impossible to quit, until this happens…

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Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome to Stop Drinking Podcast

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help you make stopping drinking a simple, logical and easy decision. We help you with tips, tools and strategies to start living your best life when alcohol-free. If you want to learn more about stop drinking coaching, then head over to wwwsoberclearcom. Do you know what stopped me from quitting alcohol? For the 10 years that I drank was one thing and one thing only, and today I'm going to show you what that one thing was. I'm going to show you how to overcome it and how you can stop drinking alcohol without any willpower, without going to AA meetings, without feeling like you're missing out on anything. I'm going to show you how I did it. So what was the thing that stopped me from quitting drinking alcohol? It was all in my mind. So what I used to think is that if I stopped drinking, how am I going to deal with life? How am I going to deal with stress? How am I going to be able to socialize? How am I going to go to a nice restaurant? How am I going to, you know, unwind after a hard day? How am I going to celebrate? But I had all of these things that I associated alcohol with. So I used to think okay, if I don't drink alcohol, how am I going to survive? How am I going to do all of these things? And even when I didn't drink, all those beliefs were still there. Right, I saw alcohol as this thing that added loads of value to my life. So even during like the periods where I'd stop and start because I drank for about 10 years, but I would stop a month here, three months there, six months here you know, I stopped and started all the time. Even during the periods where I stopped, I still held on to these beliefs. And I'll tell you what those beliefs were. They were nothing more than fear, and it was the fear that by stopping drinking alcohol, I would be worse off. That's it. This fear is totally, totally irrational. I'll tell you why. All of those things that I thought that I associated alcohol with were often created by alcohol in the first place.

Speaker 1: 1:51

I'll give you an example. So I used to think how am I going to relax without alcohol? Let's just break this down a little bit further. When you drink alcohol, you're actually addicted to a drug. Don't skip the video. I know that might sound like a shock, it might sound a bit harsh, but it is drug addiction. Right, you're like a shock. It might sound a bit harsh, but it is drug addiction. Right, you're drinking a drug. When you take a drug, it's an addiction. There's just different levels of severity. No matter how you want to put it, even if you only drink a glass of wine a night, there's still some level of addiction.

Speaker 1: 2:15

So what happens in this relaxation example is, when you don't have the drug, there is a very slight feeling of not being relaxed. There's a very slight feeling of not being relaxed. There's a very slight feeling of agitation. Now, for a heavy drinker, there's a very big feeling of agitation. But even for the casual drinker right, for the person that drinks half a bottle of wine at the weekend they still get this weird slight feeling of agitation. So during the 10 years that I drank, I would get that feeling and then it would instantly be gone as soon as I drank.

Speaker 1: 2:40

What I thought was happening before I studied alcohol and before I started researching is I thought alcohol was making me feel relaxed. No, it wasn't making me feel relaxed at all. What was happening is alcohol was creating a feeling of being unrelaxed in the first place. And if you've read any stop drinking literature, this kind of example comes up time and time again. But the point of the matter is, is almost every fear I had about stopping drinking alcohol was created by alcohol in the first place?

Speaker 1: 3:06

I'd give you another example. I used to think that if I drank alcohol I was more social. If I really reflect back at my life, what it may have done is alleviated a moment of fear to approach a new person or maybe to say something a little bit controversial or outlandish, so it would remove this sense of fear. But did it make me more social? Absolutely not, absolutely not. Like man, if I get four beers in me, I am talking complete nonsense. Oh, I remember I was in a members club once in London and I have this really vague memory and I have got no idea what I said to this guy. But it was this massive black dude. He looked like I don't know some gangster or something, looked scary as, and he stood up and he like pushed me and confronted me. And I'm not, you know, I never, I've never really gone into a fight like that before and I was like, oh what? And I can't remember what I said. That's the thing is. I can't remember what I said Wait, hang on. So so wait a minute. I'm afraid of stopping drinking alcohol because I might not be able to socialise Yet, at the same time, struggled to stop drinking alcohol was because of this fear, and all of it was in my mind, every little bit of it.

Speaker 1: 4:15

It was all in my head. And once I stopped drinking alcohol, all the reasons why I thought I drank went away and I felt totally fine without drinking. Now how I got there was when I stopped drinking just under seven years ago is I did do a lot of introspection. I read a lot, I thought a lot, I did a lot of journaling and I really unpacked it. And that's why there's no chance of me going back to alcohol, because I've really reflected on it. And these days, you know, I'm totally fine to socialize without drinking.

Speaker 1: 4:39

I feel 10 times less stressed, and if I do get stressed, I've got ways of coping with it without going to a drug. If I want to relax, guess what? I don't need to go and drink a drug. That makes me unrelaxed in the first place. I can have a bath, right. I can go for a massage, I can go for a walk, I can talk to my partner, I can watch a movie.

Speaker 1: 4:53

There's a million ways to relax that don't involve taking a highly addictive poison, but the fear of stopping drinking alcohol is massive. It is the biggest problem that people face, and it's exactly what I do in my program is we eradicate this fear? So then, rather than stopping drinking, feeling like this, this fighting, this struggle in this battle, it feels more like a logical choice, because that's what we're trying to do. We don't want to live our lives struggling and fighting and resisting alcohol forever. Oh, mosquito, mosquito. I must not get bitten by a mosquito. I think I've said this in a few videos, but I got. I got dengue fever like a year ago, and I'm terrified of getting bitten because I think if you get dengue fever a second time, you can die. Anyway, we're good. The point of the matter is, you have got nothing to fear, and I'll tell you this.

Speaker 1: 5:35

I went from being fat, lethargic, financially broke, broken up in my relationship, destroying a business, to stopping drinking and literally living the life of my dreams, being in a place like this. You know, I'm about to get married. I got into the best shape of my life. I've been able to travel the world. I've, you know, we just got back from, like, this amazing six-week road trip across all of America. It was insane. We're now here in this incredible villa. I mean, all of this stuff happened after stopping drinking alcohol and I'm telling you you've got nothing to fear. Life just gets better and better and better. Thanks for checking out the Stop Drinking Podcast by Sober Clear If you want to learn more about how we work with people to help.