The "With Or Without You" Vibe & Why It's A Man Magnet

Ohhh I've been waiting to share some wisdom with you wonderful ladies and this week is the week.

In this episode, I'm sharing the mindset strategy I created last year (and that I now teach my clients) in order to exude confidence, femininity and positivity. It quickly gets you out of negative thought patterns and sabotaging behaviors that keep you from attracting a great man.

Listen to learn all about the With Or Without You vibe, what it is and exactly how to use it!

Click here for the full show notes.

Want to learn ALL the "with or without you" strategies in one great system? Click here to get the Feminine Attraction System and start transforming immediately!

Interested in working with me privately for 1:1 coaching? Click here to schedule a free consult with me. 

What if men aren’t rejecting you — they’re reflecting you?
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Your self-image sets the limit on what you attract and create. And when you change the image within, everything reflects differently.

Download The Identity Reset and discover how your past experiences quietly built your identity and how to transform those patterns so love, success, and confidence become your automatic new normal. Download The Identity Guide for free.

Remove subconscious fears while you sleep and change your energy to become emotionally available? You need The Reprogram For Love audios. You'll change your old "type" and feel calm, confident and comfortable in your own skin with ANY MAN.

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Transcript

Hey, ladies. Welcome to this week's episode of the Blooming podcast, the with or without you vibe, and why it's a man magnet. I am so excited to share this episode with you. If you are somebody that wants to learn how to be a man magnet for godly, secure, wonderful men and repel what I call the losers, liars, and little boys, keep on listening. Have you ever felt like you are never gonna meet a guy that you love? Have you ever felt like you're not good enough and a guy is never gonna find you attractive or pretty enough or young enough or you have too much baggage? Ugh. You're divorced.

Oh, you have kids. Oh, your house isn't cute. You don't really have a great job. You don't make a lot of money. Your credit is messed up. You're nothing skinny like you used to be. You don't really have the style or the hair or whatever.

You're too short, you're too dark, you're too loud. You're not. Let's stop with a list of all of the negative thoughts that you have.

This is the reason. Well, one of the reasons that you're not with the guy that you want, and I'm going to tell you exactly how to get him. And it's with the with or without you vibe. This is a concept I created sometime last summer when I realized I was committed to and ready to date again and meet a guy that I really, really liked. I wasn't feeling really positive about myself, and I kind of felt like I had to fake it till I made it kind of a vibe. But I thought, I don't want to just, like, make a list of, like, things that I'm grateful for or, you know, really fake it till I make it, because I think that there's sometimes that that feels even worse because, like, you cut you, you feel nervous, and you feel like you're lying to yourself, and it could just make you feel crappier. So I've come up with a new way or a different way of approaching this with or without you vibe.

And, ladies, it's a Mandev magnet. It is something that whenever I am feeling down, I think about, and I immediately, immediately feel like I am just the best thing since sliced bread. And I'm a christian woman, and I'm not somebody who, you know, lies to myself or says things that would go against, you know, what God says or the Bible says. And so this is very biblically sound, but it is concept that I think will really, really help you, especially if you are single and dating. If you're new to dating again, if you really want to meet a man that you really, really care about and you want a guy that, let's be honest, we don't want a guy that. That wants a tacky chick. And, you know, you're not a tacky chick.

Or maybe you used to think you were one. Because let's be honest, guys, there's some guys that, like, want and look for insecure women and women that don't feel really good about themselves because it makes them feel really good about themselves. And women that are insecure are easily manipulated. And when you take this perspective of, like, ugh, like, when you're always focused on the negative, you attract men that want that kind of person and that low key, they're the same way. So you don't want a guy that's insecure and doubtful. Why? Men need to be leaders.

You need to be with the man that you respect. And when a man is insecure, doubtful. Sure. We all have those moments. Operative word being moments. You want somebody that is a leader, confident, positive, has a plan, sticks to it, can get you out of your funk. And you really need to do that for yourself first.

And this is a method that I use to really get me, especially if I'm dating, especially going on a date and you're ready to get back into the dating scene. This is something that I wanna help you with. So, okay, I wanna explain to you a couple things. The mind, the psycho, like our psychology. The mind is a really tricky, funny organ. It, God made us really perfectly. But it has these default systems that I believe he created because he wants us to depend on him.

But these default systems can. If you believe them and you go towards the negative, the enemy uses them to make you feel really crappy. Okay. And it makes. And he can use them to get in the wrong environment with the wrong people and then really jack up your life. So we have what's called a negativity bias. Our brain is more likely to believe the negative than the positive.

And you want to be careful when you have a negative thought, or you go towards that because it can seem easier or more true to believe a negative thought. Okay. The other thing that I want to point out about our brains is a lot of people, unhealthy people. I know. I want to point out the word unhealthy because this is very, very true. And I want you to think of what a healthy person or an unhealthy person would do in this instance. Unhealthy people love things, love things that they can't have.

I'm going to say that again. People that are unhealthy, not secure in themselves, not secure in their love for themselves. And what God says about them, they really are attracted to things that they can't have. It's this really unhealthy. It's like a trauma bond. I want to say, like, the enemy will make you think, look, if you have this, your life will be better. So want this thing, and it makes you want things that you don't have.

Whereas a secure person has what they want and they want what they have. I'm going to say that again. A secure person has what they want. In other words, they get what they want. They securely and confidently go after it. And what they have, they always want it. They're focused on being grateful for it.

That's a healthy, secure person. Okay? An insecure person will say, or an unhealthy person will say, oh, look at him. Look at my friend's boyfriend. Look at my friend's husband, and he's such a good guy. Like, look at my husband. Ugh. And they.

And they bemoan what they have, and they look outwardly externally, and they covet what other people have. Okay? So there's this. And people talk about it. They're like, you always want what you can't have. And it's actually a really unhealthy mindset. God calls us to desire what he has given us to be grateful for it.

Like, think of. Think of the prayer.

Our father, right, that. The prayer that he taught us to teach, that he. He taught us to pray. In the book of Matthew, he says, our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

He calls us to first be the first part of it. He tells us, this is like a template. He basically tells you how to pray to God, Jesus. Because people were asking him. His followers and disciples were asking, Jesus, Jesus, how do we pray? We see you pray to God. How do we pray?

And he says, this is how you pray. This is the template. He doesn't say, say this prayer. This became a prayer that people started praying. But what I want you to notice is that what he said, this is a template. It's like a resume template, right? When you look up, like, how do I make a resume.

You wouldn't use a resume that you found online and then just submit it to a company. No, no, no, it's a template. You're supposed to replace it with your information, youre job duties, you know, your experience, your education, all that stuff. So the our father prayer is actually a template, and it starts with, our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. So, your father, you're in heaven and your name is holy. Give us this day our daily bread. Right. And forgive us our trespasses.

So he says, ask for what you want, and then forgive us of our, of our sins that we do. Right. So the first thing he calls you to do, though, is say, your name is so holy. Like, our father, you're in heaven, and I'm down here, you're so holy. And what that means is like, pointing out gratitude for who he is. And that's the first thing he wants you to do, is point out the holiness of your father and how great he is and where he is. He's in heaven.

That's where he rules. And where he is is where actually, where we're going to be. But right now you're in on earth. Right. But he asks you to, like, note the fact that your father is holy and he's a great man. And where is he?

He's in heaven. So I wanna offer to you one of the things that makes people very joyful, not happy. Joy is very different than happiness. Happiness is you'll get excited over something that happens. Joyful is this long lasting contentment that you feel regardless of any situation, any circumstance. Happiness. Oh, this happened.

That made me happy. Joy is no matter what circumstance I'm in, the weather is bad, or the weather is good, it's raining or it's sunny, I'm joyful in any event of it. Why? Because I recognize that God is good. Whatever he creates, it's for my good. Right. So in the our father prayer, he basically states out to note the holiness of what you have, and you have a great father in heaven, and that's where you're gonna be.

So I believe that when we focus on and look at the things that you have right now that are amazing and why they are amazing and why they're great, it automatically changes the way that you feel in the moment. I know people that are feeling depressed, they're depressed not because they don't have things, and some people don't have things and they're missing them, but they're so focused on themselves. They're so focused on what they lack. They're not focused on what they have and what is coming or what could come or what could be that that's what makes them depressed. Depression isn't like the state of the inability to be hopeful and feeling powerless or helpless, like there's no change. And God says, you know, he starts every morning, you know, with the new mercies, and he gives us new change every day, and he gives us new possibilities. And he asks, and he says to ask for what you want. Right? Knock and the door will open.

Seek and you'll find. Ask and you shall receive. He says this to us. I forget what Bible verse that is. And, and you'll receive it. So in his I it's a petition, it's a prayer. It's asking him what you want.

But first, it's noting that the brain, your flesh is sinful. It's made. It was born. You were born a sinner. You were born somebody that's more inclined to be negative and to go towards sin and look for things that just focus on yourself. Whereas the spirit, your spirit isn't self focused. It's focused on God and loving and worshiping God and seeking versus kingdom.

And then when you do that, he will by default, because he's such a beautiful, merciful God, when you just love him and spend time with him, he gives you the mercies of your heart. Why does that happen? It's not. One thing I want to notice is people think if I love and worship God, he's going to give me things. No, no, no. It looks that simple. But that's not how God thinks and that's not what he wants. What he knows is, Annabelle, if you spend time with me and you see how much I love you, and you experience the peace and the security and the safety and the overwhelming joy in my love, it's gonna make you feel so regulated, so safe and so loved that when you feel loved, you by default, you have, you are an overflow.

Your cup runneth over, right? He anoints your head with oil and your cup runneth over. He says, it says in psalms 23, right. And you overflow. And because you're in the overflow, by default, you become a person whose heart is more pure, your soul is more pure. And you stop sinning and you become very convicted. Like, I was talking to my friend Michelle the other day, and I was telling her, the more holy I get, the more whole I become, the more like Jesus I become, the more I feel like a sinner.

And you would think that you would become just. You do become more sinless. Right. Like, you sin less. Right. The objective isn't to be a sinless person. It's impossible, because you have.

You're a spirit in the body, and the body is always more inclined to negativity to sin. Right. But what happens is when you become. I was telling her, the more I. The more I come closer to God, the more aware I am of my sinful nature. And when I just have a bad thought, I catch it in my thoughts where I, thank you, Jesus. I don't sin as much. Why? Because I don't have the desire to.

Because I catch it at the thought level. Because I'm so convicted. Because I notice that isn't a pure thought. And because of that, and that's because of God's nature, God's presence. When I'm with him, the more time I spend with him. I spend hours with him a day. He changes me, and then he.

Because he changes me, I change towards others. I love other people, and I love myself so much more. And so because. And because we're loving other people. When we love and serve others, others serve and love you. And you receive so much through other people. And that's why when you love and worship God, he gives you the desires of your heart.

That's why that scripture, it's said very plainly, but I hope I kind of explained it a little bit better there. Seek ye first the kingdom of God. And then he will give you the desires of your heart. Right. Sacrifice of yourself and don't live your life. Live the life that God wants you to lead, and then you'll get the things that you want. Why? Because you come from an overflow. Right. All that to say.

All that to say. I just want to make the distinction of. I wanted to point out the fact that to notice that your flesh, your human nature, your humanity, will always make you focus on the negative and will make you focus on things for yourself and be very selfish. It's all about independence, self pleasure, wanting things that benefit you, and.

But it'll also. The enemy is such a butthole is that he will focus and make you think you are a bad person and that you're not worth anything and nothing good's gonna happen, and other people are crappy, too, and you shouldn't be around them, and they're just gonna hurt you. He makes you want to stay isolated. He makes you think of yourself as a bad person. And so you have this proclivity to just think of yourself, be more negative and not think that you're good, and so that will make you feel really bad. Okay. Your spirit.

God doesn't do that. When you're with God, you're more focused on your spirit. The Holy Spirit enters you. You're full.

The Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit cleanses your heart.

God lets you. The Holy Spirit will always show you the things that you're doing wrong. And then you'll want to change because you feel the peace and love from God so much. And then you love more. Right? You love, you feel so safe and you feel so trustful, and you feel like the world is great and you're an overflow of that love and that peace that you love and serve others from that peace, never with any intention or desire for anything back. Right. And then things happen because you're in the world of service.

You're in a life and a mindset of service and because of this. So I wanted to point out those differences first. Right. You have a negativity bias, but the spirit has a positivity bias. You're more inclined to look at the positive and serve others. But that's. That's who you are and that's the truth of you. Right. But I want you to think of.

So now back. Okay? So back to the with or without you vibes. So I wanted to explain that to you because I needed you to see that when you are focused on the bad things, nothing good comes of it, right. But I want you to focus that if you notice, if you stop it at the mind, at the thought level, you won't act on it, you won't believe it, and then you won't act on it. And then you're not going to have negative results. I want you to consider that God says that you are beautifully, wonderfully made.

You're a precious gem. You know you are.

He knows you intimately. He loves you. There's so many great things about you, and you need to focus on that. But when it comes to dating, okay, when it comes to now, you're out there and you're like God, you're praying for a husband or a boyfriend. Before you get a husband, girl, we got to get you a boyfriend. But before you get to a boyfriend, you got to start dating. Right. And you have to date properly in a really beautiful, loving way.

And I believe in a very secure, feminine way. Right. But for you to do that, you need to show up in a way that attracts great men to you. You want to repel the bad guys and attract the good ones. How does this happen? The with or without you. Vibe. When you.

You know, when you have that, when you understand that men, a lot of people want things that they can't have. There's this challenge that's born in a man. He is made to go out and conquer and fight. He doesn't look at it like, oh, I want something I can't have. He just wants. Men want things that are valuable, and men want things that make their life better and that give. That. Make them a better man. Okay? Good men.

I'm not talking about insecure janky guys, okay? A healthy, secure man that loves God and follows Christ and is going to be. Is a good husband and wants to be a great father. He wants a woman of high value, a woman that respects herself, and he wants a woman that will make his life better because she is a great woman independent of him, okay? And it's not like he's like, oh, I need a woman. I want someone that I can't have. No, that's an insecure guy.

He looks at a woman. Wow. A woman with high standards and is very valuable. She feels like I can't have her easily, because a woman with really high standards. I call it the five. There's this thing that I teach in my program, the feminine attraction system, and it's the feminine standard staircase. If you buy the program, click below, you can get it. It's $47.

Such a great program, and it teaches you the feminine standard staircase. This vibe. It's the with or without you vibe that I'm talking about. But I teach it very differently in there. But it's this vibe of, I have a lot to offer. I'm a great woman, and you can't easily have me. A woman with high standards and high values.

She doesn't date just anybody, right. She's very particular about how she dates. She dates slow. She dates with a lot of space. There's this thing that I teach, the five areas of space. I'll talk to you about it right now. And she has high standards that, and she wants a particular kind of guy, and a secure man wants a woman like that.

My stomach is growling so loud, you guys. Oh, my God. It's 1022. My stomach is growling like.

Like, I'm not even hungry. I'm like, my stomach. Poor baby. I'm gonna. I'm gonna feed you right now. I'm not even hungry. And so a man with a great man wants a great woman, and he wants a woman that respects herself.

Loves herself, and one of the ways that he knows that she respects and loves herself is she has high standards and she doesn't just date anybody. And she doesn't date quickly, and she doesn't fall in love fast, and she doesn't trust just anybody. She doesn't have sex with everybody. She is very, very, very self assured, self secure, confident in who she is and knows what she has. And this is one of the ways and reasons why a woman, I would say a woman like me, I don't just date anybody. I do love everybody. I do love men, but I don't just date anybody.

I date a particular kind of man. And I date with space, I date slow, and I date with high standards. So what does this look like in a woman? It's the with or without you vibe. Okay. A good man knows he can't just have you, right? He knows that you have to choose him.

Insecure men think that they can just, that they can have you and they want things that they can't have. They play this really unhealthy, toxic game, okay? And a healthy man wants you and he wants to, he knows and he respects you. And he says he knows he needs to work for you. And by work I just mean it's going to be a process and it's going to take time. An insecure man says, I want her now, I'm selfish. I want to get all the benefits from this woman.

I want to have sex with her soon. I want her to commit to me soon. I don't want her to be with anybody else.

He's selfish, right? And he wants what he wants. He wants it now. And he's not going to take his time. When you date in a feminine, secure way, which is the way I teach you, teach you in the feminine attraction system, you come off as very secure and feminine and very confident and you will weed out the loser guys that are very selfish, right? Because they play games and they're very inconsistent with what they want. So you have to remember a woman with high standards and that trusts herself and dates slow, dates with space and has high standards, why does she do this?

Because she knows how valuable she is. She knows I am the daughter of a king.

I am preciously, wonderfully made. I am intimately known. God knows how many hairs I have on my head like I have. My father is the richest man in the world, the smartest man in the world, and the most powerful man in the world. You are talking to a queen, a princess. It's not this elitist form of thinking, but I want you to take that mindset. I want you to look at it like that.

If your dad was the smartest man in the world, which he is, the richest man and the most powerful man in the world, a man that is everywhere. He's omnipresent, he's omnipotent, and he's.

And he's omniscient, right? He knows everything, is everywhere, and is the most powerful man in the world. This is. This is the with or without you vibe. I want you to look at it like, it's like the feeling of having a win winning lottery ticket in your pocket. Okay? Imagine you played the lottery.

Imagine you got a text, got an email, and got a phone call, all at the same time. Like, you won a hundred million dollars. That ticket that you bought last night, you won. No one else won. You got it all. This is what you're actually bringing. That you're getting a check in a month.

Like, it's literally coming to your house. It's going to be direct deposited. You're going to have it. It's all yours. $100 million. You don't have to pay the state tax. Like, let's say it's 200 million.

What you end up keeping is $100 million. How would you feel if that was the case? If you knew, oh, my gosh. This ticket that I have in my pocket right now, in my purse, it's the winning lottery ticket. How beneficial would you be to the world, to people you know, to your children, to your friends, to a man? If you had $100 million, what would that do for the kind of life that you would lead? Right? And listen, I don't want you to think of it like a guy's just going to want you for your money.

No, no, no. I want you to think of the feeling that you have when you feel that security of I never have to worry about money again. I never have to worry about where I'm going to live. I never have to worry about living in a bad area, of bouncing a check, of over drafting my account, of having to work really hard, of what am I going to wear? Like, you have everything you need. You have everything you need. And everything you need is coming. That is what it is to be the daughter of a king.

I want to offer, okay? This is what it is to be saved by Jesus Christ. So this is the mindset that I go into every day. I wake up with this gratitude, right? But this is the vibe that I have when I'm talking to a guy, because this is what I want you to know that you are. And this is what he will have if he has you.

You are that valuable. You are that great, and you are this beautiful person that has access to everything you need. When Jesus is your lord and savior, because he provides you everything you need, even in your lowest moment, you will get every. He provides you everything you need. You are never without safety or joy or good things to look forward to. There's always so many good things. Okay? And one of the reasons that I believe a lot of women don't have the man that they want is because you're constantly focused or complaining about the life that you have now and the life that you think you're going to have later.

And the kind of men that are in this world, you're always in this negative mindset of men are buttholes. There's no good men out there. Men are so selfish. You know, I've been hurt a lot. I don't really have a lot to offer. I'm not a good woman. Sometimes it's not even about you.

You have negative thoughts about men. And whether you're thinking these negative thoughts about men or you're thinking them about you, either way, whatever it is that you're thinking about is what you're going to get. And it's the vibe, the feeling that people are going to feel when they're around you. So I want you to think of something really quickly. Imagine that every time you complained about something in your life, God took it away. Imagine every time you were. Had a negative thought about something that you have in your life or that something that you wanted and you didn't think was possible.

God was like, okay, then I'm not gonna give it to you, and he took it away. Imagine complaining about your job. Okay? Ugh, my boss is such a butthole. Ugh. I don't make enough money. Okay, it's gone. Poof. Gone. No job, no money. Now. Ugh, my bed is so uncomfortable.

Poof, no bed. You're sleeping on the floor. Uh, I'm.

Ugh, my body. I'm so fat. Poof, no body.

You're gone now. You're gone. Ugh, my kids are so loud and annoying. Poof, your kids are gone, right? Oh, my car is so not cute. I wish I had a Tesla. Poof, gone.

Now you have to walk to work. Imagine, like, I don't think we realize that complaining, the complaining mindset that we have is not. Is a lack of gratitude for what you have. It is a lack of stewardship. Everything you have in your life, you did. Please know that you did not create it. God gave it to you.

It is a gift. And when things that are, when you are gifted something, God expects you to steward it. Well, how would you treat your car versus, if you treated, how would you treat your car, a car that your friend let you borrow for a month, consider that. Imagine your car's broke down. You have no way of getting to work now. You have no way of picking up your kids from school, going to the grocery store. You need a car so bad.

And your friend has an extra car in her garage, and she's like, I'll let you borrow it. Just take care of it. Yeah, and just give it back to me in a month. But go ahead. It's yours. I'll pay the insurance. You just fill it up with gas.

One, how grateful would you be? Two, how well would you take care of it if you had kids? No eating in the back.

No making crumbs everywhere. You're going to drive it. Well, you're gonna, you know, you're not, you're, if it needs oil, you're probably gonna put oil. If it's the thing, the alert service thing comes up, right, you're gonna take care of it really, really well. This is our life. Your life is, is given to you. It's a gift you did not make yourself.

God gave you life here, and he gave you life here very purposefully because he knows you're here to do something in this world. You have a lot of purpose for him. Right? So when think of your life or relationships or whatever it is, when you don't steward all the things that God gave you, your home, your car, your food, where you live, your bed, anything that you have, your job. When we don't steward it, well, God takes it away. He has the ability to take it away not because he's mean, but because he's a good God. He's a just God.

You know why? Have you heard of the story of the talents? I think I talked about it in the last episode. When you can't handle something, God's like, oh, you can't handle it. Let me take, I want to give you, I'm never, I'm never, I'm a God that will never give you more than you can handle. Let me take it away and give you what you can handle. You can't handle a house? Okay? I'm gonna give you an apartment.

You can't handle a really, like, a strong position in leadership. Okay? I'm gonna give you a job of just being an employee, a team member. Right? You can't handle a body that requires, like, to be really fit, whatever. Okay. Then you can just be a little couple, like 30, 50 pounds overweight. Okay? Right. You can't handle the responsibility of having a lot of money, then I won't.

Then I'll give you a little bit of money. This is because it's very, very intentional. God is a really, he's a really just God, and he doesn't want to give you more than you can handle. But if you're saying that you can handle it, being able to handle something is managing it well. It's being in gratitude of something. It's acknowledging who gave it to you and taking care of it and being, and saying thank you, thank you, thank you, and taking care of it well. If you don't think that there are good men out there, God's not going to give you a man, because you know what?

They're all men are imperfect. If you want a perfect man, you're not. God's not going to give you anyone. Why? Because there are no perfect men out there. Every man is imperfect. If you, if you want a perfect job, guess.

And you're complaining about your job being hard, no. Work is work. It's supposed to be difficult. It's supposed to grow you. It's supposed to be a position that, that you're able to do, but nothing that impossible, right? But if you complain about things that you have and you say that they're difficult, he's gonna say, okay, then I'm gonna take it back and give you something that you actually can handle. If he shows, if you show him that, look, God, I can handle this. It's difficult, but I can handle it.

He will give you more to handle. He says, oh, good, you're capable of it. Great. Let me give you a bigger house. Let me give you more money. You tithe. Okay, great.

Let me give you more money that you can tithe more into the kingdom. He's very, very, very logical and a very just God. The way, the same way that he says, I'm not going to give you a lot that you can handle, you know, I'm not going to give you more than you can handle. I'm going to give you more when you can handle it. But he knows you can handle it. When you steward it well, you're stewarding it well. When you're grateful and you're taking care of something really well, okay.

I want you to consider that you, the woman that you are, if you are complaining about who you are and you're not showing up in the best way possible, like, you have that winning lottery ticket. If you're complaining about life, right? If I'm so ugly, I'm not pretty. I'm not this. A lot of times, God is, wants you to, he wants to see, like, what are your, what's. Where's your heart posture, right?

Where are you? And, and it's unfortunate, but, but energy begets energy, right? He wants to see how you feel about yourself, and he's always gonna be there to remind you of how great you are. But if you're believing the negative thoughts that your mind is prone to go to because it has a negativity bias, because the enemy will just give you more negative thoughts, he's like, who's available to you? He's like, hey, come to me, and I'm gonna, I'm gonna cheer you up. I'm gonna, I'm gonna tell you the truth. But if, you know, but come here.

It's an invitation. It's always an invitation.

God, he's a gentleman. Oh, Jesus is a gentleman. He'll knock on the door, but he wants you to open. He's not going to force himself in. The enemy. He forces himself in. He kills, steals, and destroys, and he will bombard you with the negative thoughts because he's a butthole.

Jesus is not like that. He'll say, hey, I'm right here if you want it. And what I have is really, really great to offer. He has that withdraw without you vibe, right? So how do you get the with or without you vibe, right. How do you, how do you stay in gratitude and stewardship? How do you stay in the mindset of, I have what I want, and I want what I have, and I love what I have, and I'm grateful for it and more is coming, and how do you embody that? Wow. I have.

So I'm the daughter of a king, the billionaire, a millionaire, the strongest, most powerful man in the world. How would you walk around if you had that right? And instead of that negative mindset of lacking, of stewardship? Because if you stay that way, God say, oh, you can't handle it. Let me take it away. Oh, men. All men are jerks.

And you don't want. You're better by yourself, then fine, then be by yourself. You don't want a man, right?

How many of you have? Like, I want you to think of it.

Think of this. When was some. When was a time that you had something and you didn't take care of it, and it was taken away, like, very clearly, like, you were late to work all the time. You messed up at work.

You were being lazy. You were whatever. And you got fired. You didn't take care of your body, and you gained 50 pounds, right? You were really horrible with.

With a man. You cheated on him, or you pushed him away. You were really mean to him, and he left.

He was like, I'm out. I bet you missed it afterward, right? I bet you felt the void of not having that in your life. Right? The same way that if you don't get clear on your value, on how amazing you are, if you don't get clear on what you have to offer a man, he's never going to see it, and you're never going to reap the benefits of having a partner that sees you the same way that you see yourself. So I want you to think of yourself as getting really clear on all the great things about yourself, like having that lottery ticket in your pocket. If you were talking, if you went on a date with a guy, imagine going on a date and sitting next to him, and you're just like, he doesn't realize I'm a millionaire.

He doesn't realize how great of a woman I am. He doesn't realize my dad is the richest, strongest, most powerful, smartest man in the world. He doesn't realize what kind of a wife I'm gonna be. He doesn't realize, like, how dope I am. Like, this guy has no idea. And you're just sitting there like. And I say this.

I want you to consider this, thinking about this without this elitist, like, I'm so much better than him. No, just, like, I'm so happy that I'm this kind of person. Like, I have a lot of money to offer. I have a lot of peace to offer. I would be such a great girlfriend. I'm gonna be such a great wife. I'm gonna be such a great mother. I have.

I have so much love to give. He would be so lucky to have me.

Like, he has no idea. But the reason you have this mindset is because you're always focused on the great things about you. You believe what God says about you, and you believe what really is true about you. Right? Sometimes you don't think this because you're only focused on the negative. So let's get you focused on the great things about you. So I'm going to give you some exercises to do to get you focused on this, with or without you vibe.

And why it's a total man magnet. How do you think that you would be? And how would you show up on dates? How would you show up in the world? When you just go to trader Joe's, when you just go to target, when you go to church, when you go to family events, when you go to work, when you go on social media, when you go anywhere? How would you show up if you had that winning lottery ticket in your pocket, if you knew that your dad was the richest, smartest, most powerful man in the world and you knew that you were going, you know what kind of woman you are, and you know how to treat a man, and you know what kind of wife you're gonna be to him? How would you show up on dates?

You would be very confident, and you would be so self assured. You would be so peaceful. You would be so calm. Like, my husband is the luckiest, gonna be the luckiest guy in the world, and guy across from me on a date.

This guy has no idea. Like, he's winning in front of. He's sitting in front of a winning lottery ticket right now. Like, I'm gonna be such a great wife. So let's talk about ten. So here's the exercise that I want you to do, and it's a couple things that you can do. You can do all of them or pick one, but I would suggest doing all of them because I think they're so, so helpful.

Write down ten things you love about yourself. Ten things. All right? Write down ten things that you will do and be for a boyfriend that you know that he would love. How are, what are ten ways that you would show up about yourself? Whether it's. You will be really accepting.

You know, you're gonna. You're gonna always have a job because you love your career. You're always gonna be providing income to the family, right? You're so fun to be around. You're so joyful. You're really accepting of men. You don't try to change them.

And if you try to change them, you know, you check yourself really quick. Or if, you know, if you notice yourself trying to change a million things in a man, you'll let him go because you'll realize, oh, this guy isn't for me because I'm trying to change him. And he's just like, he's perfect for somebody, but he's not for me. Right? Maybe you're really adventurous, and maybe you love sports, not like me. Maybe you're really sporty and you. And you're dating guys that like sports, and you would be like, you're such a good companion for sports games or maybe you cook really well.

Maybe you're, you love babies and you love family and you're really family oriented. Maybe you love Jesus and you're a really great christian believer. You're a woman that will pray with the man, that will worship with the man, that will read the Bible and study with the man, that you will pray for your man. What kind of a woman are you that if a man had you, he would be so lucky? What are ten things that you are committed to being as a wife that you know that if a man married you, he would be so lucky to have you? Maybe you're committed to being a stay at home mom and you will be a stay at home wife. Right? You're somebody who would be a really great supporter and encourager of his dreams and his vision, and you're a great team member and you're going to follow him anywhere, right?

You're going to trust him and you're going to let him lead and you're always going to be there to encourage him. Maybe you're a great cook and maybe you're a great home organizer. You know how to make a house into a home. Just think of the things that, the things that you would be and if, especially, ladies, if you're a woman that's been divorced or you are a mother now and you've learned what not to do in a relationship and you know what to do now, how would you show up and how is he going to benefit from that? Right? So think of the things that you. How you would show up as a wife and how he is going to benefit from that in the future.

I would even encourage you to write down what did you do before that you would never do now in a relationship. What kind of a woman were you before you were saved? And what, and what do you, what did you do then that you would never do now? And why? Why don't you do them anymore? Maybe you used to drink a lot and smoke weed and, and have sex with men really quickly. Or maybe you used to be really controlling or used to work a lot of long hours and maybe you hated kids, or maybe you didn't want to be a stay at home mom.

But now you see the value in all these things, right? I want you to write down ten things that God loves about you. What are ten Bible verses?

And I have. I have actually have ten that I'm writing down here in the show notes. So if you want to read them and you want to see them, click below on the show notes. So you can read them. What are ten things that God loves about you, right? So you can always remember them. What are ten things that you get paid to do at your job?

Let's say if you work, what are ten things that people that your job pays you to do and you do really, really well? That you're like, oh, yeah, when I do this, the way I answer phones, the way I'm organized, the way I create systems, the way I lead meetings, whatever it is. You do excel sheets really well.

You greet customers. What are ten things that you get paid to do and you do it really, really well that you know, that your boss would like, rant and rave about you. What are ten things you're really grateful for right now in your life that you have, okay, whether it's your car, your job, your health, you know, your faith, whatever it is, and write down ten things that you want to have in your future and that you're asking God to give you. I want you to be in hope as well. I want you to leave this conversation or this experience or this writing exercise with ten things that you know that you are waiting and praying for God to do if it's his will for you, right? And that you're excited about receiving. Maybe it's the city that you're going to live in.

Maybe it's the kind of home you're hoping to have. Maybe it's the, the health that you're praying God to give you. Maybe it's the, you know, the vitality and energy or the healthy body. Maybe it's the husband that you're hoping for. Right? Or the new career that you want or the income or the savings that you're going to get, or the new house you're going to buy, the new city you're going to live in. What are ten things that you're praying God to give you and that you're in expectancy for?

I want you to notice that the way that you show up in this world, this with or without you vibe, this gratitude, this, and I call it the with or without you vibe. I think I should have explained this in the beginning. It means I'm good with a man, and I'm good without a man. And it's this feeling of I'm so confident when I'm single because I am in God's arms and he is fully taking care of me and he always provides for me.

And I'm good with the man. I'm good with the man because I know what kind of woman I am, what kind of girlfriend. I will be what kind of wife I am going to be. And with you. With you. Guy, right? A guy. A man.

Oh, my gosh. You're so lucky to have me. I'm going to be even. I'm going to be such a great partner. So with you, I'm really great. And you will benefit so much from me. But I'm also good when I'm single because I have everything I need.

And God always provides for me. And I'm happy to just be in my own energy, to be in my own presence. Why? Because I'm never alone. God's always with me. I'm always happy. I'm always joyful.

I have everything I need, and I never need for anything that I want. God always provides. And when you show up with this vibe, this, with or without you vibe, this positive, I'm good without a man, and I'm good single. It's like the episode. It's like last week's episode. You will attract men that are looking for a woman like you because confidence and joy and happiness is really attractive to a man. Ladies, one thing that a man wants the most is a happy woman.

He wants to know that he doesn't have to work his butt off just to make you happy, but what he does makes you even more happy. You have joy. Joy comes. Joy is one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit. Joy is the fruit of the Holy Spirit. I should say, not one of them.

I think there's nine, right? A secure, healthy, godly man wants a woman that is joyful in Christ, that is always in the knowing and always understanding that she has everything that she needs, that she loves everything she has, and she has everything that she loves, that God will always provide it. And if he doesn't, it's because that's his plan. But this is very attractive to a man. This, with or without you vibe, this. I have a winning lottery ticket in my purse. Right? Like, you would be so lucky to have me.

But again, in a really beautifully humble way. And you will show up really differently. You will. This is a man magnet. Men want a joyful, happy woman. Because if you're happy in your own life, you'll be happy. You'll be happier with him because he knows he will work his butt off to make you even happier. Right? And if you're not happy with him, he isn't going to really want to be around you because unhappy with people, unjoyful people, people that are not joyful, that are really negative, that are in living in sin, that are depressed that are just, ugh, they feel really yucky to be around.

But I want you to know that if you feel that way, Jesus will cure you from all those feelings. He will help you be in joy. He will bring you so much peace and joy and hope for the future because he always provides you everything you need. Jesus is all you need. All right, so I hope this was, this episode was helpful. I wrote all these things in the show notes, all these the exercises that I just talked about. If you want to learn about the feminine attraction system and you want it, buy it.

Click below and get it. It's only dollar 47. You get it immediately. You have lifetime access to it. I teach you this with or without you vibe, but in actual practical steps on how to attract a secure, godly man that wants a relationship that doesn't play games and how to repel the guys. This vibe, this with or without you vibe is that feminine attraction system. I'm thinking, ladies, about renaming the program, mostly because I don't think it embodies what this program is, but it does help you be in this feminine, secure energy that it helps you attract a very godly, secure man.

So if you want to know about the five spaces, the five spaces, five areas of space that you need to create with the man in order for him to want to be with you and to know that you have high standards in order to date slowly, instead of dating this very hurried, fast way that I talked about last week, download the feminine attraction system. You'll have it immediately. You could start using it. There's audio files, there's video files, there's the PDF. Everything is there for you to learn.

Access it now. It's such a great program. Hundreds and hundreds of women have bought it.

They love it. And if you're looking to really practically use and create this with or without you vibe, that program is for you. So I hope I'll see you inside there and I hope this episode was helpful. I will see you next week. I'll talk to you soon.