Overcoming a Catastrophic Injury with Timothy Alexander

On this episode of ADJUSTED, we welcome a special guest, Timothy Alexander. TA shares his story and inspiration for overcoming a catastrophic injury.

Season 5 is brought to you by Berkley Industrial Comp. This episode is hosted by Greg Hamlin and guest co-host Allison Marlow, Sr. VP Business Development & Marketing for Berkley Industrial Comp.

Visit the Berkley Industrial Comp blog for more!
Got questions? Send them to marketing@berkindcomp.com
For music inquiries, contact Cameron Runyan at camrunyan9@gmail.com

Transcript

Greg Hamlin: 0:12

Hello, everybody and welcome to ADJUSTED. I'm your host Greg Hamlin coming at you from beautiful Birmingham, Alabama and Berkeley industrial comp. And I'm excited to share with you this rebroadcasted episode. This is one of my absolute favorite people that I've ever met. And that's Timothy Alexander. So I've met Timothy Alexander TA twice. And both times I left inspired, motivated and with a desire to be a better human being. I just don't think there's anybody you could meet that could do this better than Timothy Alexander, as he talks about how he's overcome a catastrophic injury and became a paraplegic. His determination to walk his determination to stay positive, and his determination to reengage in making a difference in the world rather than staying in a back bedroom really inspire me. And it's made me think a lot about how powerful our thoughts are in controlling our outcomes. And so I hope you enjoy this episode with TA as much as I did. So with that, we'll move to the episode. Hello, everybody, and welcome to Adjusted. This is a workers compensation claims podcast for workers compensation enthusiast. I think there are a few of them out there somewhere in the world. I'm your host, Greg Hamlin, and I am with Berkeley industrial comp and Sweet Home Alabama. And with me is my guest host today.

Allison Marlow: 1:44

Hey, it's Alison Marlowe. And thank you, Greg, for having me back. Today, you're having a conversation with one of my favorite people in this whole world TA. And I'm so excited to be able to share his story with our listeners.

Greg Hamlin: 1:58

That's exactly it. So our guest today is Timothy Alexander. You know, he's a amazing individual has amazing story to share with us today. I met ta a few years ago at one of our company retreats. And as we were thinking about topics to cover for our workers compensation podcast, I really wanted a chance for all of you to hear what it's like from the perspective of somebody who's gone through a difficult injury. And so, you know, Timothy's told his story on TED talk on all over. And it's really an inspiration. So we're glad to have you with us today, Tim.

Timothy Alexander: 2:34

Ya know, it's an honor to be here. And thank you all so much. And, Allison, thank you for all you do for always allowing me to share my story, whether it be on stage, whether it be with his son, and now whether it be on his podcast, I really do appreciate you all and all the opportunities that you all grant

Allison Marlow: 2:51

me. Oh, thank you.

Greg Hamlin: 2:53

We appreciate having you for sure, too. So yes. So I know I've heard the story about some of our listeners have not probably heard, you know, do you mind sharing how you those who can't see because this is an audio Timothy Alexander TAs in a wheelchair. So I thought I would have him share his story with us today of how he came from being a high school athlete, too, to where he is today.

Timothy Alexander: 3:22

Yep. So it's funny you asked, I was actually just giving the same message, short message this morning with our football team, just reminding them on how I went from walking one day to rolling the next, I was a five star athlete with the opportunity to go and play ball anywhere in the country. And I remember running off the field on the Friday night before my accident happens. And my coach said, look into stance. Look at all these people here to see you. You're gonna make everyone proud, you'll be able to go on and choose any university you want to go to. And I had a heart full of joy and I had tears full of joy. Because my senior year was a very, very rough year in my life. My house burned down my senior year, my grandmother passed my senior year, I lost my brother, my middle brother in a car accident my senior year. And on top of all of that, just so many things happen. And then on top of that, again, My accident happened my senior year, the day after I told my mom, she went I have to work a minimum wage job to provide for three young men. I'm going to earn an education. I'm going to make it to the NFL and I'm going to come back and do something for my family. Not just because I was great at football, not because I was talented, not because I was skilled, but only because I have came to a place in my mind that I knew if I can do anything in this world that was going to allow me to change my lifeline that was going to allow me to make a difference than where I come from and where I'm going. Football was going to be that vehicle that would drive me there and it will It's not just about me playing football forever. But again, I look at football as the vehicle that gets me to my next destination. And so when I had my car accident, it was a very, very rough, it was very, very traumatizing. Because I went from walking one day to rolling the mix. I went from walking one day to being able to dress myself and do everything on my own. And to the next day, I'm being told, I may be a vegetable, the rest of my life, someone may have to feed me, someone may have to clothe me and do all these different things, at 17 years old. And so you go from having complete independence, to having no dependents, wearing diapers and opinions and all these different things that will make you want to give up. And I'm not going to even lie to you, I didn't want to give up because I couldn't imagine a life like this. So I was depressed. I was suicidal, I tried to take my life. You know, my mom played a big role in my life, by just getting me to understand that it is what it is, but it's about what you make it. I remember, I woke up out of a coma. And I was tied to the bed and I had a trach in a feeding tube, I had a tube in my lungs, and I whispered to my mom, if I got to be like this the rest of my life, you might as well pull the plug. So my mom gets up and walks over to the hospital bed. And my mom says my son, my son, blink your eyes, if you can hear me, the doctors are saying you're not gonna make it, they believe you're going to be a vegetable. But son, blink your eyes, and you can hear me and so I blinked my eyes. And my mom said you will live and not die. And so I always like to stop right there. Because everybody always looks at me with a blank stare, but they're blinking. And they always want to know about what was so important about the blank. Well, I do understand whatever your occupation is, whenever you are a professional in some sort, no one has to tell you to immerse yourself in your occupation. No one has to tell you to immerse yourself in your whatever it is that you do professionally. You just have a niche, right? The lawn man, he's the best lawn and when he got that motorcycling, okay, and so my mom knew because she worked in the hospital field in the healthcare field. My mom knew that, okay, if the doctors are telling me that my son is brain dead, and he may be brain dead the rest of his life, and I can give him a command, and he respond to the command, then I know he will be okay. And me being okay. It was not an instant gratitude. It was a delayed gratitude. And so my mom knew that if he can blame that, let me know. He may not look the way I want him to look now. But later on, he will, because he is what they call responsive. And so in that moment, when I did not have anything else to hold on to recovery came because I held on to what I heard. And that's my message for the people. You know, it's not that we don't talk a lot is that we stopped talking, right? It's my mom used to tell me all the time, when I'm not talking to you, then you should know we got to my coach tells me, hey, if I'm not talking to you, we have a problem. But just as we talked to everyone else, we got to continue talking to ourselves, and recovery often stopped. Because we stopped talking to ourselves, we stopped motivating ourselves, we stopped encouraging ourselves. We stopped believing again ourselves. And we look for everyone else to encourage us to believe in us and to motivate us. But at the end of the day, well we have to understand, what do you do when you have in a moment? What do you do when your loved one is not around? What do you do when a doctor, the nurse, the janitor, whoever it is that you depend on? What do you do when they're not around? I was just able to grow in those moments when I had nobody but myself. But I started first with my mind. And so my competitive advantage on how on how I've been able to recover 15 years later, is because I recover in my mind first every single day. We call it football. We call it in football. Ball security is job security. Well, mental stability is mental security. And if you are not mentally stable, then you are just a loose cannon getting ready to go off. And so when I was depressed and suicidal, I said okay, it doesn't take rocket scientists. I I've been going to the psychiatrist I We go on to these counselors. But at the end of the day, it's about me taking action, and to my own hand, and thinking the opposite of worse. And the opposite of worse is better. The opposite of negative is positive. And so I had to do that. But I had to make up in my mind that my recovery was not just going to be an one day's work, it was going to be an every day's work. So I spend a lot of time on my mind. Because at any moment, Allison at any moment, Greg, if I'm not mentally stable, then I can easily go back to being depressed and suicidal. Because I am in a wheelchair, people walk in front of me, every single day, people run in front of me every single day, I see how different I am by looking at people every day. But I have to remind myself that it is the difference that allows me to make a greater difference. And so I got to be different than anybody in this world by choosing to start with my mind. That's how I went from being paralyzed from the neck down to fill in came back. Because once I got myself back in the game, I said, I will win my mind. First.

Greg Hamlin: 11:15

I think that's huge that you talked about the importance of mindset. And I really do think that's yeah, that's a principle that could apply to almost anything is he starts with your thoughts. Yeah. So how did how do you when you are going through the early stuff the first few days, months, even maybe a year of of going through that terrible accident? How did you control your mind? Because I would think it'd be really hard with with the things you were talking about to not have those thoughts, just run, run circles in your brain? Yeah.

Timothy Alexander: 11:46

Well, when I couldn't control my mind, my mom controlled it for me. And she controlled it by not bringing any negative information to my mind. So all I can do was think positive. My mom just told me the other day, son, there were days where the doctors told me, Hey, get the family together, because he's not going to make it. And I knew if you would have saw me crying, or you even would have heard that, that injury would have took you out quicker than anything. So my mom had to control my mind. And I'll never forget, when I took matters into my own hand, I'll never forget meeting with Dr. Tice, here at UAB was going on my last week because I had to cut my back open when I broke my spine and gave me a titanium plate with five screws. So I got a huge cut going down the middle of my back where they opened me open like a water mill. And this was the same week where I had just tried to commit suicide three times in one week. And so I told myself, as soon as I get to the doctor, and the doctor asked me that they always on a scale of one to 10. What's their pain? I'm like, right? And I'm like, I put my mom out in a row. I said Dr. Tice, I don't need you to talk to me like I'm a patient. I don't need to talk you to talk to me. Give me this PhD talk. I don't need any of that. What I need is for you to be completely honest, because I don't want to be here. And I've already tried to commit suicide, right? So is it anything you can do to help me? And Dr. Tice, took off his white jacket, sat down on a seat. And he said, Tim, your mind will kill you quicker than his injury will. If you don't get your mind right. The best information I can give you is get your mind right. And it was on that day when Dr. Thais told me to get your mind right is when I went on this hiatus and Trent being transformed by the renewing of my mind. I thought differently. I talked differently. I spoke differently. I as you hear me, I never address myself as a guy in a wheelchair. Always say let me walk here. Let me walk there is because I'm playing mind games. And the best mind game to play is the positive mind game with your own mind. Because you are your thoughts. If you tell your mind, oh, I'm just going through the motions, then you're just gonna be going through the motions. When somebody asks you how you're doing and you're like, Well, I'm guessing that your body is already lackadaisical announced. And so I just say it again. You know what? Words are something that you don't get back when words come out of your mouth. They go find what you say and bring it and drop it right at your seat. And so I wanted my words to go out there and grabbed the best, not the worst. And so I am very, very cautious. And what I say, I am very, very cautious and what I think, because again, you are what you think you are your thoughts, you are what you think about day in and day out. And to me the goal mind is your mind. And so once I started first in my mind, I just talked about this today, too. I coach five star athletes, we coach champions, and I told them today, your competitive advantage is not how fast you are, not how strong you are, not how skilled you are, not how versatile you are, your competitive advantage is your mind. And so for me, my competitive advantage became different than anyone else with my situation. Because I was willing to be a different thinker, right? It starts with the mind. And adversity is what pushed me to just really fall in love with my mind. And what do you know, my mind shocked me and land me where I am today. Wow.

Greg Hamlin: 16:10

That's amazing how how there's so much to unpack there about how how did you end up? I know you're talking about working with division. You know, these five star athletes talk to us about how you ended up involved in football again, after going through this? Yeah.

Timothy Alexander: 16:28

Yeah, so after I ended up in football, I could not watch football for like a year because it would depress me, and it makes me suicidal. And I said, You know what, man, I can't run from my problems. Because if I keep running, I'll be running and I never deal with it. And eventually one day running from is gonna have my back up against the wall to where I got to do with it. And so I had a friend that tell me, you're going to be a great motivational speaker one day. And I didn't even know what a motivational speaker was. I'm like, man, what is that? Like, I have no idea what that is. And so I knew I had a great story to tell. So I started off just trying to just go back and be a part of society. I started look using my life as a living example of my quote, We don't need it to be easy, we just need it to be possible. It wasn't easy being 17 years old, wearing diapers in the pants. It wasn't easy, being 17 years old, and I'm having to go through my alphabets 100 times a day. It wasn't easy, being 17 years old, not having control of my bladder and have a control about things that you really wish you had control over. But I could not run from it anymore. I had to deal with it. People ask me all the time. How did you deal with your issues, it's simple, I just dealt with, right. And by me dealing with them, the more I was impressed by dealing with my situations, the more I began to grow in the midst of adversity. And so I came, I came across a quote by ever Einstein early in my journey that says in the middle of adversity lies opportunity. And so those tough moments in my life, where I wanted to give up, those were opportunity moments. Those were moments for I used to say for God to get the glory or, you know, being resilient to get the glory, you know, all these different things. But those were the moments of no pain, no gain. And so once I graduated high school, I've said to myself, if I graduated high school, in spite of I can graduate anywhere in spite of so I went to Wallace State Community College and at Wallace State Community College, I made sure that every athlete, every student I came in contact with, I reminded them to whom much is given, much is required. If you're not an athlete, if you're just a student, man, fall in love with being a student. I know school sucks, but you got to embrace it. Because guess what, you you you longed for school, when you can't go to school. I don't care what children are saying. When the schools open back up. Everybody was trying to go back to school, because it's like, Man, I cannot spend another day in this house. Right? Well, for two years, I was on bed rest. For two years. All I had was four walls. I couldn't go to school. I couldn't go here. I couldn't go there. So when you when you loan for something, when you end up getting it, you try to really maximize it. So when I graduated from wild State Community College, I said you know what? I'm gonna further my dreams and I'm going back to school to play football. But I knew me going back to play football had nothing to do with me going to the NFL. I was actually telling everybody man, I'm playing for someone greater than you and my number one assignment at that time in life because it's changed now. That my son from 2010 all the way to graduated from 2015 was led every teacher athlete, let everyone know that let everyone know that. Take advantage of it why you can't, because you never know when you can't take advantage of learning, take advantage of working, take advantage of being alive, because you never know when you can't. And if you are not mentally prepared for that, like I wasn't, then life is gonna be rough for you. So go ahead and use my life as an example, to go ahead and get your mind right. That way, you don't have to go through what I went through, you can learn from me what I went through, I would not wish on my worst enemy. Because I still deal with that every single day, I had to let friends go, I had to let family go, just so I can have a piece that surpassed all. And even when I made the football team and became the first paraplegic and Deewan history to ever receive a full ride in football. I still was challenged because everybody was like, they just gave you that feeling sorry for you. And I'm like, No, they did it. I don't even feel sorry for myself. So although I was not running up and down the football field, I was running through my teammates. I was doing push ups and rain, sleet or shine. I remember one day, a severe fluid came, we was all outside and they was like, Tim, what are you going to do? I'm like, man, just take the wheelchair, get the wheelchair out of here, because it's made out of aluminum. The guys picked me up and we went to like this storm shelter. And still to this day, if you ask any player, or anybody at UAB, about Tim in a wheelchair, they are saying, Tim is not in a wheelchair. He's just, he's just short. I know what I'm saying. Because of how my mindset how my mindset just got them to understand like, man, don't be don't don't look at what you see, fall in love with the mind, which is what you don't see. That's why concussion is so hard to figure out because you never know if a person is concussed or not. And so when people see me, I want them to know beyond reasonable doubt that this man is healed and hold. Because he starts with his mind, it may not look like it, right. But once you talk to me, and you hear me, and you see my mind, you will be like, Man, this guy is in a better place. So I got involved with football, because I said I would be the example to remind these guys to take pride in what you do. And once you be at all, which is appreciate where you are, work hard for what you want, that earns you the right to see the results that you want. And so because I was appreciative, I appreciate being able to go back to school, because I remember when I couldn't go to school. I appreciate being on a football team. You don't see too many guys in a wheelchair in the football team. So because I was appreciative. I was willing and willing to work that earned me the right to see the results that I want. Because I made a conscious, intentional decision. And I will start with my mind every single day. Yeah, wow.

Allison Marlow: 23:22

Every time that I get to have an opportunity to talk with Uta, you just amaze me. And I want to go back for a second. It's something that you said about Dr. Tyson struck me, you had the mindset of saying, I don't I don't want to hear the medical jargon. I don't want to hear the what ifs I want to hear the reality and and that just leads me to you know, you you spoke about him and you spoke about your mom and then helping you with your mindset. Who else in your life has been able to help you through this journey and you spoke touched a little bit on that sometimes you gotta let people go from your life if they're failing you from your progress and to get to the recovery you want to get to. So just love to hear a little bit more about, you know, your perspective on really both family and friends and the impact that they have on your recovery.

Timothy Alexander: 24:13

Yeah, you know, my family and my friends, they, they had a tremendous impact. But I really am thankful for my family that was completely honest with me. You know, I have this thing that I call complete transparency, which is being brutally honest. Right? Because when that doctor comes in there to tell you, you better get it together. He being brutally honest, sometimes they say doctors are right. You know what I'm saying? But when when I was in a situation where I was when I was trying to become healed and hope I didn't need anyone beating around the bush on me. I needed complete honesty, so I could face reality completely. Right. And so my family members says that it will hurt them to see me how they saw me. It hurt me to cut ties with them. Because when I came around them, they made me sad and depressed. Because I'm not realizing I'm hurting anymore. But they cried, Oh, I'm sorry, this had to happen to you. And you just get to a place in your life where you you want to stop here in the Tsar? Because I'm not sorry, no more. Right. And so I had to cut my friends and some of my closest family away, because they did not get that right, that I don't want to talk about the woods and this thing that I don't even want to talk about, what if I don't walk again. And so if you don't respect that, or respect me enough to do that, then I gotta go with my certain weight, my friend that fell asleep behind the wheel. Everybody asked me, Do you still talk to him? No, I do not. Do I have a problem with him? No, I do not. But at that time, when we had that car accident, my friend could not go on with his life, because he was blaming himself. And at that time, I was blaming him. Right? You know, just being honest. But then I knew that if I wanted to be healed, and hold and have a peaceful life, that I had to operate in forgiveness, not just forgiving him, but forgiving myself and saying, Hey, what happened has happened, we're gonna move forward to the future, I'm gonna go this way, you go that way. And once we become mentally stable, then we can meet back at the top of the ladder, you get what I'm saying. But most people may not do that. Most people, families, plant plants funerals, before the doctor even tell them to plan their funeral. Right? And so I just got my, my close knit family, my wife, my family, my friends, my loved ones, everyone knows, Jess beyond, right? Just beyond. And by being honest with me at the front, will allow me to embrace anything someone says for me in the middle of my journey, right? Because expectations has already been a friend. That's why I tell athletes, hey, I'm not telling you, you're gonna come in here and start. However, I do know, if you willing to put in the work, you have a 99.9% chance. So one thing we do know, you will never be able to say what Coach ta lied to me? No, he was too honest. That's what he was. And that's how I live my life. All because truth sets us free. And I have been able to be free from depression, free from suicidal. Because the doctor said, hey, it's a 5% chance that you may gain your strength back. But it's also a 5% chance that you may not. And so I say am I gonna worry about the 5%? May not? Or am I gonna worry about the 5% you made? So I bit the bullet and said, I'm going with the 5% chance that I made. But I had to be honest with my sales. So when someone asked me, Hey, did the doctor say what is the doctor saying? The doctor is still saying 15 years later, you have a 5% chance and you may or may not walk. But that's not what I'm saying. Right? I have to be respectful and be honest, to hear what the doctors saying. But at the end of the day, it's about what I choose to do with it. So yes, I do hear, but I'm not allowing what I hear to affect the truth that I believe that one day I will be walking again. It may not happen now. But eventually it happened later. Which is why I truly believe in the growth mindset of looking at every difficulty as a challenge that leads to growth.

Greg Hamlin: 29:03

That's amazing. So you said something I was really, I was a little off topic. But I'm curious because I guess that's my nature. You mentioned your wife. Did you meet her before the accident or after? Yeah. How did you meet

Timothy Alexander: 29:15

her? Yeah, I met my I met my wife after the car accident. You know, I'm actually I met her after my car accident met her at UAB my senior year. And it was very, very different for her. You know, my wife is a very, very sweet hearted, you know, she works for basketball here at UAB. And I remember when I met her all the boys on the team was like, no way you're gonna be able to talk to her man, that girl. And, and I was like, what, don't let the wheelchair fool you. You know, I went and just pursued her and still to this day and when we talk about it periodically, I always ask her to make sure that her answer is still the same. Just as it was years ago as why you gave me a chance, and she just simply said, Man, you were so confident I had to. It was just being confident. Yeah, just being I was just confident understanding. I know I'm in a wheelchair. But what what does that mean? Right? You know, I know it's different. And we don't see as much. And you don't see where chair relations like that here in the south, you really, if you want to see something like that, you got to go to the west coast or go somewhere where the states are more accessible. But I knew that in spite of my dilemma, that I still had something to offer. And it wasn't about who didn't see it, it was about me seeing it. And it's still difficult because I'm still in a wheelchair, and the same issues that I have to deal with. She deals with some time, right? This is she deals with, when she see a couple of running and walking and playing ball together. She's human, you're gonna be like, Man, I wish me and my I could do that. And so being mentally stable, is like, hey, we can't do that. We just got to find a different way of doing. So we can play basketball, I just got to go and get me a wheelchair basketball chair, you know, we can play tennis, we can run we can't swim, we just got to do it differently. You get what I'm saying is always is it's all about those who are recovering the best thing that I can tell someone who is recovering, take away every excuse you can make. I used to not go over people house who didn't have steps, who had steps. Because I'm like, ain't no way in the world. I'm climbing up no stairs. However, that was causing me to miss opportunity from family, from friends from network and from loved one. So I took away that excuse step saying Don't stop me by not going to stop me. And by taking away excuse that provided me an opportunity to go farther and do more. And that's how I still recover. Because I take away excuses from my own life. So when I'm coaching others or working with others, most definitely I'm gonna try to take away excuse for them too.

Allison Marlow: 32:06

That's a great point too, because a lot of times people are looking for a silver bullet and everything's gonna be great. Yeah. And once you know once that bullet hits your your say, you're gonna be recovered, your life's gonna be great. And what I love about your message and what you're really sharing with us today is that mindset isn't just one and done it, you got to take it and keep going and keep going and keep going and looking for every new opportunity to get you to that next step that you want to get into life. Your your life's not over to your point, just because it's not the way you want it to be.

Timothy Alexander: 32:39

Right, right. It's so funny you say that because before I became social with other people, I had to work on that one myself. I just ran into a lady the other day, she was like, Do you remember used to come to the restaurant once a week? And and say table for two. And you would be sitting there talking to yourself? You know, like I paid myself I spent time with myself. I took myself to the movies. I took myself out on dates I found out for myself. What made me happy? What? What made me smile. What made me look sorry about this shot. What what made me downtown. I had to I had to find out within myself. What made me happy what made me look forward what what things made me just just get butterflies, all these different things. Because even the great Greek philosopher Aristotle, he says, You got to know thyself, right? You got to know thyself. And so I spent two years just working on myself. I didn't date anyone. I didn't talk to anyone. I got myself back. I took a two year hiatus from 2008, the 2010 until I got to UAB. But I spent two years on getting my mind, right, because I knew the flesh is weak, but the mind is willing. And as long as I was great with my mind, everything was going to take care of itself. And so now I travel by myself some time, I still go out to eat by myself. I still take pride in spending time with Tim, I spend an hour a day with myself, no phone, no nothing. Just talking to myself, letting myself know how proud I am. Now, it's not always an hour when maybe 20 minutes here, 20 minutes there. But by before the end of the day, I have taken an hour to myself, but I have to do that. After this podcast, I'm going to have a celebratory swim. I'm celebrating this opportunity. Like that's just what I do. That's just what I do. Because again, I'm thankful that I can even talk about things like this, because I remember it was a time where I couldn't talk About, does it make me cried and make me sad? It'll just bring back so many memories. And sometimes counselors will tell you, hey, once you burn it, don't talk about it anymore. Like don't even try to think about it. And I'm like, man, no, you overcome by what you're talking about what you go through. Because to me, it's not about what you go through. It's about what you grow through. And that's what I've been able to do is, again, not just do it on one day. But do this every day, Allison is very tough. I read another quote by Albert Einstein, who said, for one, he said, for one negative input, he had to replace that one negative input with 11 Positive inputs. And I'm like, man, I've been doing that. Because if I have one bad thought, I get myself seven great thoughts, and it's very tough to do is very challenging is very like, man, do I really got to do this? And I'm like, Yeah, you do. Because that one thought is just going to be sitting there on your mind. And just that one thought, it's one thought that can either move you forward and move you backwards. That's why I believe we are one, one thought away from a life changing moment, which is change is recovery. And so what do I call full body recovery, a recovered mind, a recovered body is full body recovery. Because the athlete know, when I tear my ACL, yes, my ACL has to heal, my body has to heal also. But guess what your mind has to heal, too. And so if your ACL does heal, and your mind is not heal, you just have body recovery. So you may go out there and get hurt again. But when your body is healed, and your mind is healed, that's what I call full body recovery. So,

Greg Hamlin: 36:56

so when you have I'm sure there's still times every now and then where you get discouraged what, when you have those moments where you're like, Man, I today, I'm not feeling it. Because I know, all of us. Lots of people listening probably have moments where the where they say little, the little devil on the shoulder starts whispering in your ear, and you're like, Man, I just don't think I can do today. So when that happens, what motivates you, Pastor? How do you deal with that when that happens?

Timothy Alexander: 37:22

I just got done swimming. The other day at a YMCA in Jacksonville, Florida went in the shower. And I was showering on the shower bench. And I ended up falling off the shower bench hitting the floor. So be sliding all around, I'm disgusted. I'm like, I can't believe I'm on this nasty flora. I'm like, I hope I don't get staph infection. You know. And every time I got up, I was slipping, fall right back down. And I'm trying to force it. I'm trying to use my strength to get me up off the ground, will fall again, is nobody to come help me. All I can do is help myself. And in that moment, I get so worked up that I'm crying because I can't do anything about it. I'm so frustrated that I'm not even thinking, okay, the water is still running, rinse yourself off. That way you won't slip. But it took me to just take a moment to embrace that pain. What I like to call it this is what I like to do. And I hope you all it makes sense. I call it you got to embrace that pain. You got to feel that pain. You got to breathe, and you breathe and allows you to take action. What am I trying to say? When you go to a doctor and you get ready to give but they say hey, you got to give some blood today. So they're letting you know, get ready to embrace I'm about right. So once they tell you you're getting ready to get blood today, then they say you're gonna feel a lot of pain. But what I want you to do is keep breathing. Because if you don't, you may pass out. And when I count to three, you're going to feel a steak. But what I want you to do is not move and make sure you keep breathing. So you don't pass out what they're doing is telling you, hey, some pain is about to come. But now that I'm giving you it from the front, I want you to embrace his pain. I want you to feel it and three, you're gonna feel it, I want you to breathe. And by the time you get ready to move forward is already done. Because moving forward and is to me is trying and that's the best thing you can do. But you're never gonna be able to move forward all worked up. You're never gonna be able to move forward, jazz all destroyed. So like I tell people when they're crying. It is if any if we watched somebody cry right now, it's innate that we're going to do this. Yeah. Because you don't want anybody he feel those tears. But what I have learned in my, in my journey, drop him, let those drop off. You remember, I don't know if you ever seen the movie cry baby. But he kept those tears that he cried in that jar for a reason. Because it reminded him of everything that he went through, right. And so when you allow yourself to feel those tears, unless you know, man, that you are human, you are in the game, it is hurting you. But you got to feel that pain sometimes. And so that's why when I'm crying, I don't drop my tea, I don't wipe them. I need to feel that pain. Because I know I'm about to gain something based off what I'm feeling. And people don't do that. My cousin's No, man, I'm sorry to cry right now. Feel them drop them. Because you need to feel how that feels. You need to become one with your inner feelings. And by doing that, those, those Sarpo tears are gonna go to happy tears, land, you know, you can do it. And so when I got up off the ground, when I was able to stop crying, and just embrace, and take a moment and think about what needs to be done, I said, Man, this is why I can't give up. Because once you just take some time to really think about what it is that's true. What it is that you have control of your understanding is really not that bad. Right. Now, to some people, they may be like, Man, you crazy and crazy, right? But again, it's really not that bad. Because it can always be worse.

Greg Hamlin: 41:39

That's true. That's very true. That's very true. Well, yeah, I've loved having you on our podcast, you are an inspiration to me and everything you do. And and for those who haven't met yet, encourage them to reach out because you, you make me want to be better. And I really do think your thought about it all starts with your mind. I think that is so true that our thoughts lead to our actions and our actions are who we are. And you really, really show a lot of people that there's hope out there for what can come next. So we just we just really glad to have you with us today. Thank you. Any any final words of wisdom before we wrap up for the day?

Timothy Alexander: 42:22

You know, I would tell anyone that's recovering. When life seems most painful, you got to work twice as hard to stay mentally stable. Because life will check you life will try us, life will challenge you. But life will also champion you too. And that's the thing that I love about life, life challenge me. But it also champion means and I'm a champion every single day, because I respond to the challenge of life. And what's the challenge of life. Every day you wake up and you get an opportunity to be better than what you was yesterday, you can have a champion, a champion day by champion in your mind. So allow life to challenge you. I mean, I get challenged on the highway all the time. Right? You know, and all these different things, but life also champions me too, because I understand that perseverance produces character, and character hope. So you got to count it great joy when you face these trout. Because once you become mature in these areas, you will say, Man, I'm happy. I may not be where I want to be, but I'm thankful I'm not how I used to

Greg Hamlin: 43:37

be. I love that. That is fantastic. I love that. What a great way to wrap up. Ta Well, we appreciate you having us with us today. That's the end of our episode today. But we hope you'll join us for future podcasts releasing every two weeks on Monday. And if you can't get enough adjust in your life, then check out our blog from our resident blogger Natalie dangles, she this drops on the opposite week of the podcast and it can be found at WWW dot Burk in comp.com. And also if you liked or listened please get please give us a review on Apple's podcast platform. We also want to be sure to express Special thanks to Cameron Runyon for our excellent music. If you need more music in your life, you can contact him directly by Loki locating his email in our show notes. Thanks again for all your support. Remember, do write think differently. And don't forget to care