Living Lucky® Podcast with Jason and Jana Banana

The Grease Effect: How We Adapt to Society's Expectations

• Jana and Jason Shelfer • Season 8 • Episode 37

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Beyond the Leather Pants: Unmasking Your True Self with the Grease Effect (Living Lucky® Podcast)

Ever felt like you're playing a role, presenting a version of yourself that doesn't quite fit? In this electrifying episode of the Living Lucky® Podcast with Jason & Jana Banana, we're diving deep into the iconic film "Grease" to uncover a powerful truth: your quest for acceptance might be masking your true potential.

Just like Danny and Sandy, we often craft narratives to fit what we believe others want, creating friction between who we are and who we pretend to be. We dissect the film's gender dynamics, Rizzo's rebellion, and Sandy's transformative moment to reveal how societal expectations shape our stories.

Here’s what you’ll discover:

  • The Grease Mirror: Authenticity vs. Social Masks: Uncover how you adapt your story to fit different audiences.
  • Summer Nights Truth: The Power of Vulnerable Connections: Recognize the authenticity you crave in pure, unfiltered moments.
  • T-Bird & Pink Lady Narratives: Understanding Role-Playing: See how social pressure molds our personas.
  • Rizzo's Rebellion: Challenging Double Standards: Question societal judgments and embrace your true self.
  • The Leather Pants Paradox: Rebellion or Conformity? Explore whether your choices reflect your true desires or societal expectations.
  • Congruency Quest: Aligning Your Inner and Outer Stories: Learn to live a life where your truth and reality match.
  • Spark Your Energy: Identifying What Truly Lights You Up: Discover how to live a life driven by your authentic passions.

This episode is a wake-up call to question the stories you tell yourself and the roles you play.

Key Nuggets:

  • How social expectations shape your narrative.
  • The importance of aligning your inner and outer self.
  • How to identify and challenge societal double standards.
  • The power of vulnerable connections.
  • Strategies for discovering and living your authentic truth.

Who's The Baddie Podcast

Ready to ditch the masks and live your true story? 

How to find your authentic self, How to break free from social expectations, How to align your inner and outer self, How to live a life that feels genuine, How to stop living a lie, Ho

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*Previously Recorded

Jana Shelfer:

Are you ready to create a life you crave? Let's spin that doom loop of negativity into an upward success cycle and start Living Lucky®. Good morning, I'm Jana, I'm Jason and we are Living.

Jana Shelfer:

Lucky you are too, We've been invited to the who's the Baddie podcast with Matt Tyler and Chris.

Jason Shelfer:

So fun.

Jana Shelfer:

And we are going to talk about the movie Grease.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh, I'm glad you said the movie Grease. I might have been confused.

Jana Shelfer:

What you thought the country.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh, there you go.

Jana Shelfer:

Or just Grease in general.

Jason Shelfer:

Like. What type of grease do you use to cook with?

Jana Shelfer:

Grease is a feeling Jason.

Jason Shelfer:

Grease is a feeling. It's just like Living Lucky®.

Jana Shelfer:

It's a feeling, it's a mindset.

Jason Shelfer:

That's right.

Jana Shelfer:

It's a coolness, it's a vibe, it's an energy.

Jason Shelfer:

I love the thought that it's an energy.

Jana Shelfer:

It's emotion.

Jason Shelfer:

Energy in motion is emotion or emotion is energy in motion. Yes, so Greece is a feeling.

Jana Shelfer:

It's exactly what we talk about, and so, as I have been studying this movie again and again, because I've watched this movie my entire life- it is my favorite movie. It is. In fact, I believe it was the first movie I saw in a movie theater.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh, you saw it in a theater.

Jana Shelfer:

And I believe I was three years old.

Jason Shelfer:

Well, your memory goes back. Like you have an excellent memory. I remember and, it's just to be honest, it's one of my guilty pleasures. I really enjoy the movie.

Jana Shelfer:

And I also remember seeing it at a drive-in theater.

Jason Shelfer:

What.

Jana Shelfer:

But I was just playing on the blanket in the 60s?

Jason Shelfer:

is that when you saw that no?

Jana Shelfer:

I'm not that old, it didn't come out till 1978.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh, I love it anyway that would have been so cool to see it in the um in a drive-in I don't remember it very well.

Jana Shelfer:

I just remember sitting on someone's lap.

Jason Shelfer:

Especially at that.

Jana Shelfer:

And I remember that first scene at the beach. I remember that that little romantic scene yes, yes, Like I want to grow up and have that. Where they're being authentic with one another and they're truly just falling in love. However, they're in a bubble.

Jana Shelfer:

They're not around society.

Jana Shelfer:

They're not around friends, it's just Danny and Sandy at the beach during the summer playing chasey chasey.

Jason Shelfer:

Chasey, chasey.

Jana Shelfer:

Building sandcastles.

Jason Shelfer:

And holding hands.

Jana Shelfer:

Taking pictures, giving each other those love eyes.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes.

Jana Shelfer:

And telling each other those little affirmations.

Jason Shelfer:

And waiting for that kiss till the last day of summer. Right, it's just the flirtatious I'm like, oh, don't ruin it, dani.

Jana Shelfer:

Flirtatious. I mean you can just feel.

Jason Shelfer:

it right, the hormones are going, but it's very innocent, it's so innocent and that feeling of Summer camp Kind of almost an insecure real love. It is Like, it's like I really want to tell this person how I'm feeling, but we're separating in a couple days and my chances are running out.

Jana Shelfer:

Right. And so then, I mean less than three, four days later, school starts, yeah, and you start. See, Danny starts painting a different picture to his friends.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, they start telling their own narratives.

Jana Shelfer:

And Sandy starts painting what she thinks is an acceptable narrative to not only Based on her lifestyle, her morals, all her values. What she thinks society is looking for in a female.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes.

Jana Shelfer:

So she paints this other side of it and as a viewer of watching the movie we see they're on opposite sides of the spectrum.

Jason Shelfer:

They're both reading different books here. So, thinking about it now, because we had a discussion about this while we were watching it and thinking about it now, it's almost like um, just coming from a teenage boy's perspective, like when I was in high school Danny's telling the story of what he kind of hoped for and and would would have been excited about, like he was. So he was very excited about the authenticity, authenticity and the, the trueness of their moment, like when they first met in that summer they spent together, right. But in his mind I almost feel like every night he would have gone home and gone. Oh, it would have been so cool to save her life when she was splashing in the beach, when she almost drowned, like all the things from the song.

Jason Shelfer:

Like, oh, I would have loved to have made out with her under the dock, like all these things, imagination yes so he comes back and tells what he imagined it could have been, which is also what the um, the thunderbirds, all his friends, the t-birds, thunderbirds, because they.

Jana Shelfer:

They want to know all about the. Yeah, did you get any action? You know what are her boobs like.

Jason Shelfer:

Were they bigger than Annette's, right? Nobody's boobs are bigger than Annette's, just FYI.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah, they want to know all of those horny details.

Jason Shelfer:

Really yes.

Jana Shelfer:

The teenage locker room BS and talk and is that because the male persona has been conditioned that that is what is is cool or that's what is appropriate? It?

Jason Shelfer:

might go into that whole idea that big boys don't cry, big boys don't have emotion. Big boys are about action. You know, um like all these very toxically masculine ideas.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah, because I always find it interesting when parents have you know a male and a female in those teenage years Kind of raised a little differently, and they do. They raise them slightly differently.

Jason Shelfer:

It's the same conversation when they're together and it's a little bit different conversations when they're apart.

Jana Shelfer:

Like you know, they're almost rooting for their son to get some action.

Jason Shelfer:

But still be respectful.

Jana Shelfer:

Yes, but their daughter, uh-uh, no, no, no, no, don't you lose your virtue.

Jason Shelfer:

Don't you lose your virtue. Anything your boyfriend does to you, I'm going to do to him.

Jana Shelfer:

Which is exactly what Sandy was painting to her. I mean, she was making a first impression on the pink ladies, which are now her new group of friends, and she thinks that, okay, you know I don't keep my legs together, yeah I gotta be wholesome yeah and Say no to drugs.

Jason Shelfer:

We didn't drink at all.

Jana Shelfer:

I'm here to people, please the parents.

Jason Shelfer:

We read stories and wrote each other poems on the beach. Right had beautiful romantic time.

Jana Shelfer:

Right, I mean, we stayed out till 10 o'clock. Oh my gosh, no, you didn't.

Jason Shelfer:

That was her stretch. We stayed out till 10 o'clock. We drank lemonade yeah, mike's hard lemonade like it's totally a different story.

Jana Shelfer:

She's either leaving out a few details or sugarcoating them to make it sound like this wholesome experience yes, like and danny's, like, I saved her life.

Jason Shelfer:

She nearly drowned drowned which is not true, and he showed off splashing around. But I love how they both come back to. But oh, those summer nights.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah, because it's a feeling.

Jason Shelfer:

It is a feeling. It's a feeling that they both captured.

Jana Shelfer:

They feel the feels. Yeah, they were that. They both captured. They feel the feels.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, they were feeling the feels they were catching the feelings. And then I also find interesting that when the two worlds come back together at Rydell because Danny had painted this other picture and maintained his machismo, all the traits that, yeah, he does have, but they were different from what he showed and different from the pureness of Danny on the beach- yeah, the facade he was showing on the outside was not matching his inner self. Yes, that's what I would see, the feelings like the feelings of love and adoration.

Jana Shelfer:

Gosh, I really cared about this girl and I really hope to see her again and, wow, she really unlocked a vulnerability inside me that I haven't you unlocked a vulnerability inside of me? Right, like he was feeling those things.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes, and then the worlds clash.

Jana Shelfer:

Okay, but wait Before we go any further. I want to talk about. Rizzo though. Oh, Because so for everything that Danny was painting on the T-Bird side. Rizzo was the female counterpart to that and she was almost slut-shamed.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, well, also just in the song. Like in the song she says it sounds like a drag, like this isn't this doesn't sound fun to me.

Jason Shelfer:

He's not into you yeah, I mean, you're not making out like rizzo almost paints herself as the, the girl who would be on the guy's bleachers. Be like, tell me more. Tell me more. You know? Like what was the action? Like, um, it's, it's so. It's one of those, and I think that's where she finds love, because then she comes back in the song later about it. It's not the worst thing I could do.

Jana Shelfer:

Oh, when she gets pregnant, yeah, or everyone thinks she's pregnant.

Jason Shelfer:

I could lead him on all night and then not follow through, which is almost like getting a terrible disease. Right, the cooties. It's like, oh, have you heard, don't go near her. She's got the cooties. It's like, oh, don't go near her.

Jana Shelfer:

She's got the cooties. It's just really interesting. So I want to bring these things up because it's all about perspective. Yeah, and in that I feel like we sometimes again paint this narrative or we tell stories that fit the role we think society wants us to play.

Jason Shelfer:

Oh, that's so big.

Jana Shelfer:

Right.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, and so I think the question is is where am I not being true to myself and where might I write the story that I want and live towards that Like and explore really what I want, instead of what I think society wants of me or what I think my parents want of me?

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah.

Jason Shelfer:

Like where is that? Where's the truth in there? Because all these things have truth to them, based on our thoughts, our imagination, our feelings, and we're writing our own story. What story are we telling and what story are we living? And then are they congruent.

Jana Shelfer:

Are they congruent? Because that's where, when you try to live both you get nothing. That's when the battle within there's so much friction.

Jason Shelfer:

And then there's like self sabotage that you you're probably not even aware of. And I think it's when you get the, when you start like working on yourself and actually saying what is it that I truly want? What is it that truly lights me up, what is it that that sparks those feelings and emotions and creates that energy within me, and then I start telling that story and living that story. It's very hard for a teenage boy, um, because I believe most teenage boys have that feeling of wanting to be loved, wanting to be accepted, like all these, all the really feel good feels, mm-hmm. If we don't get it from different areas, then we start immediately adjusting to what we think is expected of us instead of who we want to be, and it's probably the same for girls too.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah, I do think it's the same for girls.

Jason Shelfer:

I've never been one.

Jana Shelfer:

Oh, I've never been a boy, which is why I was letting you finish what you were saying, because I found that to be very interesting.

Jason Shelfer:

I think it's very peculiar that this movie, at the end, sandy is the one that ends up changing, more so than well, danny's now got a letterman jacket on from someone who smoked cigarettes and drank and went out with the boys all the time. But he takes that off immediately he does take it off Back to his black shirt.

Jana Shelfer:

He's like oh, I can be back to my authentic self.

Jason Shelfer:

I got my girl. Now I got my leather pants girl, and she's smoking a cigarette and wearing red high heels and she's ready to dominate me. I feel truly loved and accepted.

Jana Shelfer:

I feel truly loved and accepted. So I'm not sure the overall message is one that I guess the message at that time was. You know, at that time it was love, drugs and rock and roll.

Jason Shelfer:

It was, I think it was Rebellion. Rebellion, energy of like excitement, what's exciting and honestly there's, and it was rebelling against society, maybe rebelling against what our parents wanted for us.

Jana Shelfer:

You know, this is no longer the yeah.

Jason Shelfer:

Because of the 40s, and we have to admit that Sandy was a little vanilla Like. She just didn't have a lot of flavor. Yeah, it was like this is the prim and proper way. She's toeing the line the whole show and then it's like well, maybe there is some excitement to be had here.

Jana Shelfer:

Yeah.

Jason Shelfer:

So I don't know that she kept the leather pants on forever after that.

Jana Shelfer:

Oh, in my mind she did and teased her hair. She did in yours too. You had the poster on your ceiling.

Jason Shelfer:

I had the poster on my ceiling right above the bed.

Jana Shelfer:

Anyway, we're going to talk about this in length on the who's your Batty podcast with Tyler, chris and Matt.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes.

Jana Shelfer:

And so we are going to do that tomorrow morning. And it will be interesting to see what everyone else thought of this movie.

Jason Shelfer:

Yeah, we've never really talked about it in depth.

Jana Shelfer:

No, and we and we don't really talk about it with our friends or anything it's like very often we talk about it together because we watch it together I watched it my entire life because I liked the music, I liked the way it made me feel. There was a vibe, an energy energy a cool factor.

Jason Shelfer:

It had some good antagonist and protagonist in it.

Jana Shelfer:

However, I also liked Grease 2.

Jason Shelfer:

I loved Grease 2. I felt like Michael.

Jana Shelfer:

And most people would say Grease 2 was a terrible movie.

Jason Shelfer:

I would say it's the better movie because I identified so much with Michael.

Jana Shelfer:

Who's that guy? Where did he come from? Who's that guy?

Jason Shelfer:

Where did he come from? Who's that guy? Where can you get one?

Jana Shelfer:

That's what people ask me all the time when can I find a?

Jana Shelfer:

Jason, maybe you are Michael.

Jason Shelfer:

Maybe I am.

Jana Shelfer:

Okay. Well, thank you for joining us, and I encourage everybody. We're going to put the link to this podcast once it comes out. We're recording it tomorrow, so who knows where all of this conversation will take us, but it is a lesson in perception perspective and expectation.

Jason Shelfer:

Yes, and the story that we're telling ourselves about all that.

Jana Shelfer:

What society expects from us and how do we adapt or overcome?

Jason Shelfer:

and just navigate navigate I love it awesome. Keep Living Lucky®.

Jana Shelfer:

Bye-bye if the idea of Living Lucky® appeals to you.