Don’t Be a Donkey: The Parable of the Thirsty, Hungry, and Dead

Are you standing exactly between what you want and where you are, paralyzed by the "perfect" next move?

In this episode of the Living Lucky® Podcast, Jason and Jana Banana unpack the brutal reality of the Donkey Parable—a story of a hungry and thirsty donkey that perishes simply because it couldn't decide between water and hay. We often do the same with our careers, relationships, and health: we stall in "responsible" analysis until the opportunity vanishes.

Inside this high-density episode, you’ll discover:

• The Parable of the Donkey: Why the search for the "best" choice is often the most dangerous choice you can make.
• Hacking Decision Fatigue: Why Jana wears the same style and Jason uses simple defaults to preserve brainpower for what matters.
• The "Wrong Train" Reframe: How to get off the wrong path immediately without the shame of "wasted time."
• Edutainment & Identity: Finding the sweet spot between wisdom and storytelling when you don't fit into a traditional box.
• Feeding the Punch: The psychological difference between action fueled by faith versus action fueled by fear.
• The ROI of Detours: Why your "wrong turns" (like Jason’s years in law enforcement) are actually secret training for your future.

If you’ve been "pacing" instead of "racing," it’s time to choose. Whether it’s water or hay, just move. Action creates the feedback you need to recalculate. Hit play and stop being a donkey.

KEY NUGGETS

• Indecision is Deception: Analysis paralysis feels like "due diligence," but it’s often just fear with a better vocabulary.
• Action Beats Inaction: Every single time. Action produces data; inaction only produces anxiety.
• The High Cost of Choice: Decision fatigue is real. If you don't automate the small stuff (clothes, food, routines), you'll go bankrupt on the big stuff.
• Feed the Punch: You can't land a strike if you're pulling back. Whether in business or love, you must go full throttle to see if the path is right.
• Recalculating vs. Regret: A GPS never apologizes; it just finds a new route. Treat your past detours with the same mechanical grace.
  
  analysis paralysis, decision fatigue, mindset coaching, personal development, overthinking, career change, productivity hacks, how to stop overthinking and take action,

Transcript

Welcome And The Donkey Setup

Jana Shelfer 0:00

Are you ready to create a life you crave? Let's spin that doom loop of negativity into an upward success cycle and start Living Lucky®. Good morning. I'm Jana. I'm Jason. And we are Living Lucky®.

Jason Shelfer 0:19

You are too.

Jana Shelfer 0:20

The donkey.

Jason Shelfer 0:21

Don't be a donkey.

Jana Shelfer 0:24

Does that sound like a donkey?

Jason Shelfer 0:26

Maybe.

Jana Shelfer 0:28

I sound more like a horn.

The Donkey Dies From Indecision

Jason Shelfer 0:30

That's all right. So there's a it's a parable, a story. We'll call it a story.

Jana Shelfer 0:35

Okay. Let's hear the story about the donkey.

Jason Shelfer 0:37

A hungry, thirsty donkey standing between a whale, a well- a whale, a well.

Jana Shelfer 0:44

A whale.

Jason Shelfer 0:45

A big bucket of water and a big bale of hay.

Jana Shelfer 0:48

Oh gosh. Which one does he choose?

Jason Shelfer 0:51

He's he's hungry and he's thirsty, and he's standing between the two things that he wants.

Jana Shelfer 0:55

So he's literally halfway.

Jason Shelfer 0:56

The opportunities in life that he's looking for.

Jana Shelfer 0:58

So he's literally halfway between the two things he wants most.

Jason Shelfer 1:02

And now he can't decide. So he's he's paralysis, paralysis. Which what do I want most? What do I want now? Am I hungry? Am I thirsty? Yeah, I'm both, but where do I go first? So we get stuck in these things all the time. Well, he just keeps thinking about it, thinking about it every time.

Jana Shelfer 1:21

So we we often say, What do I want more?

Jason Shelfer 1:24

Yes. What do I want more? Instead of what do I want now? Like, why don't I just make a choice, go to something, and come back? So what he ends up doing is he sits there and sits there and sits there, wasting the time, the only thing he can never get back, and he just perishes. He dies of thirst and hunger because he never makes the decision.

Jana Shelfer 1:44

Oh my gosh. For some reason, this is hitting me like a brick.

Jason Shelfer 1:49

Yeah, and we do like there's different things that we do this about, and I'm not saying that we should- I'm a donkey. We're all donkeys, but you're not a I mean, it's I'm a total donkey. It's a we all do this in different areas, and it's

Decision Fatigue And Simple Defaults

Jason Shelfer 2:05

it's I hate making a decision.

Jana Shelfer 2:07

I cannot make decisions, and I feel like the older I get, the worse it's getting.

Jason Shelfer 2:12

In fact, sometimes the more experience we get, quote unquote experience we get, the more we start weighing out all those options because we start understanding everything that goes around it.

Jana Shelfer 2:22

Which is why I get decision fatigue. We've talked about this many times, which is why I have tried to simplify my eating plans and even what I wear, how I do my hair. I have like three hairdo's that I go through. And I know I know by how dirty my hair is, of which hairdo I need to do.

Jason Shelfer 2:49

That's funny. Is it? Well, this I mean, we're we learned all these little hacks, like Steve Jobs had black shirt and I know, but black doesn't work for me.

Jana Shelfer 2:57

I tried the Steve Jobs thing for a decade, but it made me depressed. Can't wear that?

Jason Shelfer 3:05

I gotta wear color. Success leaves breadcrumbs, but some of them are stale and rotten.

unknown 3:10

Yes.

Jana Shelfer 3:11

So for Jana, I have to wear color, but it's somewhat similar. Right. I know that I like to wear a flowy, bright colored top and totally unrelated colored pants. And the least they the less they match, the better.

Jason Shelfer 3:28

Right.

Jana Shelfer 3:28

And then I need giant earrings to go with that.

Jason Shelfer 3:31

Just at least something unique.

Jana Shelfer 3:33

Something unique. And if I can wear a little sprout in my hair, I'm I'm good golden.

Jason Shelfer 3:39

And so this is this is a beautiful example because this is an area where you've made the decision. Yes, and it doesn't take you a long time to decide which way to go in your outfit. You say, I'm going for color, yes, and it like you just go to it.

Jana Shelfer 3:56

And I also know, like, I literally only have two pairs of shoes. And what's so sad is that I've had these same pairs of shoes now for at least 10, 15 years?

Jason Shelfer 4:07

Yeah.

Jana Shelfer 4:08

They never touch the ground. But here's the thing.

Jason Shelfer 4:12

And your feet don't grow anymore.

Jana Shelfer 4:14

So here's the thing though. I know that the outfit I choose is uh it's it's usually semi casual.

Jason Shelfer 4:24

Or what what is well we have picked cat like it can it can go either way.

Jana Shelfer 4:29

Business casual, casual, like it's just a it's casual, it's comfort, but it can also go, it can also go to a nice restaurant if I if I choose to play it that way. And then I also know it's comfortable for me to where I can move around, and then the shoes that I wear stay on my foot plate of my chair. So I mean it's all decisions, decisions, but I've narrowed it down to this is what works for me.

Jason Shelfer 4:58

Right. And but we have so many areas on in life where we will hesitate, we will say,

Fear Of Wasting Time

Jason Shelfer 5:05

and then we'll just miss the opportunities.

Jana Shelfer 5:07

Uh thank you for bringing this. I often get analysis paralysis, and uh it's so ironic that we use the that we use the word paralysis because I am paralyzed. This is a theme in my life. Oh gosh. I feel many times it's paralyzed with fear of making the wrong choice.

Jason Shelfer 5:31

And really, are there wrong choices? Like, and uh I just I guess we could point out where there are right choices, where they're wrong choices, but if it's an area where there are not as right choices. That that's true. Like there's some that are gonna get better results, and that's where it's comes down to discernment and learning to make better choices. And I think that's where when we at the end of the day, when we look at and say, what did we do well, what we what might have we done better, and how can we be more effective in the future? That's where we start tweaking.

Jana Shelfer 6:07

Yeah.

Jason Shelfer 6:07

But during the day, it's like if we're running the race, do we stop all the time and keep analyzing our footsteps? Or are we pre-race learning how to run, learning our cadence, learning our breath, breathing and all that before and then saying, okay, I've got this. Yes, I'm going to continue pushing forward, and I'm not gonna need to stop all the time as I get older and as I as I'm going through the motions. No, oh, I kind of just jumped into a medatory, mid metaphor mid-story.

Jana Shelfer 6:45

But I love this topic. I love this topic because how many times have I been in a situation where I let I'm like, I don't know, I don't know which way to go. So many times I just stop, and I I'm not always sure that that's the best.

Jason Shelfer 7:02

It's the safest.

Jana Shelfer 7:04

Yeah, but what you said about the donkey is the donkey is losing time, and the donkey ends up perishing in the end.

Jason Shelfer 7:14

I think one of our biggest fears at at the end and at the end of the month, at the end of the year, when our birthdays come around, is is that we're running out of time. We like that's we hear this all the time, every year from people.

Jana Shelfer 7:27

There's a fear that we're running in the wrong direction, right?

Jason Shelfer 7:31

Yeah, I hear that from everybody in the middle of crisis.

Jana Shelfer 7:34

I've heard you say before, there's an old saying that if you're on the wrong train, get off at the next stop. Yeah, get off as soon as you can so that you can correct your your wrong turn or your wrong trainness.

Jason Shelfer 7:47

Yeah, and you hear the hear the old saying that uh you can climb the company ladder or the corporate ladder, but make sure it's up against the right mountain or up against the right wall, whatever. It I think we're always learning. We're always if we're if we're constantly focused on learning, growing, expanding, and evolving, we're always getting value. We're always growing in a direction.

Why Waiting For Perfect Fails

Jana Shelfer 8:10

I yeah, but I understand this donkey's plight because he's he I can just put myself there going, okay, if I walk over there to the hay, what if I get to the hay, I start eating it, I'm gonna be thirsty.

Jason Shelfer 8:24

I'm gonna be more thirsty. Now I gotta go all the way to the water.

Jana Shelfer 8:27

If I walk all the way over to the water, it's gonna, I'm gonna be hungry. I'm gonna feel those hunger people.

Jason Shelfer 8:34

Burn those calories, go into that water. Yeah, I know. So I'm what choice do I make here? Right? You're so and why can't they just both be together? Maybe an option that'll maybe that'll appear in front of me. Yeah, I'll wait for that one.

Jana Shelfer 8:50

Yeah, I mean, I I totally get this.

Jason Shelfer 8:54

You're hitting me like right in the and sometimes we're sometimes we're waiting for that, and sometimes we're waiting, and that's the perfect because I think maybe the moment will come where the rain will start and the hay will get wet, and I'll get both.

Jana Shelfer 9:08

Oh, see, it's a limiting belief to think that we can't have both.

Jason Shelfer 9:13

Right.

Jana Shelfer 9:14

Well, he could have had both if he'd just walked to one and and then walked to the other, and then walk back to the other, and then walk back to the other.

Jason Shelfer 9:20

Now he's getting healthy, exercise, water, and food.

Jana Shelfer 9:23

And he's just pacing.

Jason Shelfer 9:25

Yeah, he's pacing, Jason.

Jana Shelfer 9:31

Oh, so I guess the lesson is just make a decision.

Jason Shelfer 9:35

Yeah, and just make a decision. And it goes back to several other podcasts where imperfect action is gonna be inaction every time.

Jana Shelfer 9:44

Yeah, you know, I am gonna be a little vulnerable right now. I often feel this donkey's plight when it comes to glad you said his plight. What did you think I was gonna say? His ass.

Speaker 1 10:03

I feel these donkeys balls. Oh, these balls, ball, balls. From the window.

Jana Shelfer 10:15

No, what's wrong with it? Excuse us. I'm sorry. E-uh, e-aw.

Career Choices And Creative Direction

Jana Shelfer 10:20

Don't cut that. You're being a donkey today, Jason. No, I often feel this donkey's play in my business choices, in my professional career choices.

Jason Shelfer 10:32

Where it's those times where we think, what if this happens and then I don't, I'm not able to recover.

Jana Shelfer 10:37

Yes. And sometimes I think, oh, you know what? I I really should relaunch my YouTube channel. I I really there's something inside me that feels that has always felt that I I am a host of some sort of show. And I feel like that would lead to something that might go to Netflix or something on television, even. And yet, when I start going down that route, it feels like that drains my financial resources very quickly.

Jason Shelfer 11:14

It also drains my editing and my time and takes away from the path that like it takes away from the the race that we're in.

Jana Shelfer 11:24

It it takes it takes so much from other areas of my life that I feel, is this really the quality of life that I want? And it I you know, the times that I have gone down that path, I start to feel burnt burned out, or I start to feel like I don't have time for my family, or time for you, or time for my dog, or time for fun or friends. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, and so then I think, okay, well, maybe maybe that isn't the right path for me. So then I start thinking, well, maybe it's it's speaking on stages, and so then I start going down that path, and then for some reason, that path doesn't quite light me up the way in front of a camera does, and I don't know why, because you would think that the live connection or the live stage, but I I have always been that person where I go to a Broadway play and that live show, I'm like, Yawn, get me out of here. This is boring. Whereas if I go to a TV show or a sitcom, I'm like, uh, lights, camera, action.

Jason Shelfer 12:45

And I think that's it's that mix for you because I've seen you in front of the live film.

Jana Shelfer 12:52

The live studio audience, and I'm okay. And that is like gold for you, but uh a live stage.

Jason Shelfer 13:01

Yeah, where it just comes up and just goes, like where it's like, and everybody just walks out the door and it's over. It's like that's not that's not your your that's not my gold. Yeah, but I think I see, and I think that's something that we can move towards. So I think it's something we can also do with what's going on with what we're doing right now.

Jana Shelfer 13:20

And there's also a fine line for me where yes, I want to be known for my wisdom and my experiences,

Finding The Edutainment Identity

Jana Shelfer 13:30

however, I also want to be known for my storytelling and the way I make people laugh and feel, and the way we live life. So it's kind of edutainment. I always come back to that. It always guru, I don't want to be a preacher, I don't want to be a teacher, or a goof on a comedy, or I don't want to be a stand-up comedian, right? So it's finding that fine line of who am I? And anyway, so it's making that decision and going that route. However, you know, I've I look around and I'm like, okay, well, is there anyone I can emulate or follow, or is there a template?

Jason Shelfer 14:17

And you are the template, baby. I can. You are the freaking template. Because you are the template.

Jana Shelfer 14:26

Yeah, thank you. Thank you for that. But I do often feel like the donkey, and I know that time is ticking, and I do sometimes look in the mirror and go, oh, the lines are forming, the teeth are getting a little yellower, the the pounds are getting a little uh thicker, and I think, gosh, am I just am I am I wasting these precious years in trying to decide who I am? And then at the same time, I look back and go, gosh, look at everything we've used.

Jason Shelfer 15:00

That's the thing. That's where that's where the gold is. I mean, if I look back on the last 10, 15 years, and I go through our memory books, I go through our journals, and I look at the things where we've actually laid it out and said, okay, what is it that we want to do? What is that we want to experience? Yeah, how

Feed The Punch With Faith

Jason Shelfer 15:20

do we want to grow? And I look at I look through this journey, and I've got goosebumps right now that are actually kind of painful because of the amount of growth and the experiences that we've had, it's been incredible.

Jana Shelfer 15:36

I know.

Jason Shelfer 15:37

It's been out like it's been off the freaking charts.

Jana Shelfer 15:40

You know me though, I have high expectations, and that is that is one thing that makes me great. The thing is, it also is a double-edged sword sometimes.

Jason Shelfer 15:48

The thing is, we have exceeded those expectations in so many areas, and people look at us and they go, How the how are y'all doing all the things that you're doing? How are you like how are you upright, you know, and and how do you still sustain all this? And it I they go, you make it look so simple and normal.

Jana Shelfer 16:11

Little do you know, we're just donkeys. And we're gonna be able to do that. And we're literally looking at the to the right, going, do we want water or do we want hay?

Jason Shelfer 16:22

And there are times when we just go, like, I gotta go lay and crash on the couch because I have to just take it all in. I've got to take it all in, and I just need to I need to rest my feet for a minute. Mine's my ass. I resemble that. You're talking about your literal ass.

Jana Shelfer 16:44

Oh, yeah, I think we all have our own areas of donkeyisms. Donkeyisms. Yes. However, it's funny that you bring this up. I really do feel it hit home. And I I do think sometimes. If we do, when we make a decision to go full throttle toward that decision and not feed the fear, the doubt, the uncertainty. Because the minute you start feeding you pull your punch, you do.

Jason Shelfer 17:23

Yeah. So you can either feed it, feed that punch with faith or feed it with fear, and if you feed it with fear, it's not gonna land.

Jana Shelfer 17:30

Yes. Yes, that is so true. Thank you.

Jason Shelfer 17:34

Thank you.

Jana Shelfer 17:35

Thanks for joining us.

Jason Shelfer 17:36

He's Living Lucky®.

Jana Shelfer 17:37

Bye-bye. Go out there, you donkeys. If the idea of Living Lucky® appeals to you, visit us at LivingLucky.com.