The Career Refresh is your source for actionable insights to lead, thrive, and succeed in today’s workplace. Each episode tackles key topics like leadership, career strategy, confidence, burnout, team dynamics, and the 4Ps—perfectionism, people-pleasing, procrastination, and personalities. With years of experience helping thousands of professionals achieve their goals, elevate team performance, and embrace reinvention, this podcast is your career blueprint.
Jill Griffin, a former strategist and media executive, has been featured on Adam Grant's WorkLife Podcast. She's written articles for HuffPost, Fast Company, and Metro UK. And she's been quoted by leading media outlets like Advertising Age, The New York Times, Departures, and The Wall Street Journal. Follow her on LinkedIn and join the conversation. Read more at JillGriffinConsulting.com for more details.
Your boss holds the keys to your next move - but are you waiting for them to unlock your potential? Rarely gonna happen. Welcome to the art of managing up, where you take control of your career trajectory instead of hoping someone else will.
In this episode, we're diving into:
The power dynamics you can't ignore (and how to make them work for you)
Strategic moves that transform you from a team player to an invaluable asset
The skip-level game: How to build relationships with senior leadership without stepping on toes
Real talk on imposter syndrome, authority issues, and other mental blocks holding you back from playing bigger
Jill Griffin, host of The Career Refresh, delivers expert guidance on workplace challenges and career transitions. Jill leverages her experience working for the world's top brands like Coca-Cola, Microsoft, Hilton Hotels, and Martha Stewart to address leadership, burnout, team dynamics, and the 4Ps (perfectionism, people-pleasing, procrastination, and personalities).
Hi friends, this is Jill Griffin, career strategist and executive coach, and the host of this podcast, the Career Refresh this week. I am talking about why we need to manage up and why it's so important for our personal success. It's not just managing down and managing over, meaning managing clients and accounts and relationship. Your boss plays a pivotal role in your success or your failure. We need our boss to know that we are in the know so that we get the resources we need to perform and to secure opportunities for our teams and our own personal development and our own future promotions. And sometimes these relationships can be really uneasy and we're going to unpack that today. Let's dig in. If you've been at your company for a while and you're doing well, that next promotion may lead you into managing more than just your core team or managing across regions or time zones, and if you're in a global company, it could be even a larger region. You've been promoted because you've been managing people well, but now we're scaling it. We're scaling you and what I see.
Speaker 1:
What happens is often two things. I mean there's many things, but here are the two things that I often see happen. Either you get promoted and elevated and it suddenly feels like you're working for a completely different company or two. Nothing has really changed, except for your title, which go back and listen to the previous episode about control freaks, because if you're working for a boss who's a micromanager or a control freak, that can be challenging too. So if you were previously overseeing a smaller team or you were an individual contributor, that position may not have prepared you for the management challenges and the management of others what is up in front of you and where they're promoting you to be doing this next role. What I see happen a lot and this especially happens in sales is that you are a high performer, so now you're tapped to take on a bigger remit, but you all of a sudden are no longer doing your subject matter expertise but leading a team and helping others perform. Helping create capacity for others to perform and continuing to do your subject matter expertise are two different roles. So learning how to motivate a team and being sure of the delineation between where you start and stop to the person that you're reporting into and to the people that are reporting to you is a nuanced challenge. There isn't a one size fits all solution. You can read business books, you can work with a coach, but until you're working in the marketplace and you're doing it in a particular company, those are the nuances that you're going to need to be observing up. But here are a few ways that you can think about it. If you're reporting into someone who has a high need for control, let's just take a pause and look at what's been going on.
Speaker 1:
More and more companies are doing away with leaders that are really managers, or what I like to call the hallway monitor. We need player coaches. We need people who can actually do the work but also can lead teams. Otherwise, the previous way of managing people was that you had a subject matter expertise and as you elevated up, you stopped doing your expertise and you were more managing people and making sure others were getting them done, but you didn't you like. You became further and further away from the marketplace nuances, so you were starting to lose your edge as a subject matter expertise. That is going away, which is a good thing.
Speaker 1:
However, if those people are still in position and they happen to be your boss, you don't want to create a scenario in which they're feeling threatened and then your life is in a constant conflict and counter hell because there's this mismanagement, and it's important to remember that, while it will be nuanced depending on which department or business unit or, ultimately, your organization, your role as a leader is to create that capacity for others. It's not to do the same work as the people who are reporting into you. That's only going to create resentment and tension, because no one really wants that helicopter parent in their world. What they do want is someone that is going to help them shape and shift towards the changes and the challenges within the organization, the ultimate marketplace. They want someone who will support and stretch them, who will guide them, who will help them move the professional mountains or obstacles that are in front of them. Those are the same things, I'm going to guess, you want from your boss, right? So when it comes to your boss whether it's a new boss or you've had them for a while my question to you is how do you view your boss? Are they a coach, are they an evaluator or are they a judge? And this can be confusing at times and it can also feel threatening that your boss can be a tremendous help and an inspiration and in order to get that help, so that you can grow in your role, you can grow your team, you can meet your business remit and your goals.
Speaker 1:
You may have to reveal some of your own shortcomings. So now I know you're thinking, jill, if I do that, they're going to interpret my weaknesses as faults and they may even drive me to a performance plan where I'm not going to have to improve on these areas and they're just not my gifts. I find that when we lead with strength based concepts, when you say things like, hey, this is how you get the best out of me, you let them know how you work best and then how you can also deliver high quality results. Similarly, let them know when you're not at your best and let them just know it. Tell it. You're not defining it as a weakness per se, but you're letting your boss know how you work and that you're willing. And you're not defining it as a weakness per se, but you're letting your boss know how you work and that you're willing and you're continuing to improve on certain areas.
Speaker 1:
I find the easiest way to solve the strength and weakness question is to do a Gallup Clifton Strengths 34 assessment. I mean, one of my certifications is as a certified strength coach by Gallup and I take clients through this assessment regularly, giving them the language, so how they can describe both their gifts and the areas where they would identify blind spots. You can choose what you want to convey and how you want to convey it. Just know that strengths and weaknesses aren't opposites. One does not become the other. Working on a weakness doesn't make it a strength. Yes, you're definitely going to improve in certain areas, but, by definition, if it's a weakness, it can never become a strength. So, figuring out your boss's strengths one of the first things that I would encourage you to do.
Speaker 1:
You may not be a strength-based culture, you may not have the Gallup assessment as a regular tool that you're using within the workplace, but you can still start to guess at what your boss is. This is where you need to leverage, so, asking strategic questions and watch when they are in the flow, when does their excellence show up? When do they seem most content at work? When we're viewing our boss the lens of are they now our friend or our foe? This is where you might find yourself striving to feel capable and in control, but in reality, you're viewing your boss as a threat. So you now might become even more confused because just a few months ago, you were promoted for doing a great job, or you were hired to the organization and you felt like a real asset. You're feeling a bit on top of the world. But now you're operating under this long haul mindset that bosses are authority and they're a threat and I assure you you're not going to be able to deliver if you're viewing them that way. You're going to constantly be charged in your language and your responses and there's going to be a constant tension. So, yes, being in the fight can generate some strategic energy and thinking of clever ways of showing up, but fight energy is not sustainable without the cost of your relationships, your health, your creativity, all the things. So here's what you're going to do.
Speaker 1:
First, like I said, after starting to be observant of what your boss's gifts are and their strengths, I don't want you to think of your boss as a judge and categorize them right away, that they're going to be judging you or evaluating you. This is a variation on all or nothing thinking, and we know that when people are messy and nuanced and tired and hungry and angry and stuff went on at home and now they're in the office, none of us are always anything. None of us are absolutely anything. So I want you to really separate that your boss is neither the judge or the evaluator. They may play that role sometimes, but there are other things too. And then I want you to reflect on your own work history, really getting clear on your thoughts around authority.
Speaker 1:
Are you dragging baggage with you? Are you thinking about something that happened early on in your career? Or there's a voice in your head and you're constantly proving yourself and it's someone from 10 years ago and you're like I don't really need to do this anymore? Have you felt this way before with a boss? Do you constantly bend yourself into a pretzel to get approval for your boss and that you're constantly seeking validation in order to feel good about yourself? And there's the old joke that validation is for parking and validation if it's external to yourself, you always have to seek it. You have to give it to yourself. Do you find yourself questioning compliance or being in resistance Again? Reflect on your history here and make notes of the things and the feelings that you've created throughout your career, because again you're bringing that to the table. So don't assume that your boss is always going to be the same, because none of us are always always the same.
Speaker 1:
Think of them as having dual roles that may shift and morph depending on the situation and, yes, that can be hard. I've worked for people that at times were my strategic mentor and helping me. You know, think through things differently and other times they were, you know, beating the crap out of me because I didn't get it yet right. So I understand that there sometimes can be a dance between those two, but those are also some of my greatest learning experiences, if I can hold aside my judgment and just try to stay present in the feedback. So I'm going to suggest that you strive for mutual dependence, right? They need you for their success and you need them for your success and the opportunity and money or the goals or whatever it is that you're going for.
Speaker 1:
On the broader scale, your boss wants to collaborate with you. They want you to lead initiatives. They want you to develop your own team. They want you to stay current. You know work cross-functionally, be able to drive both your growth and your own team. They want you to stay current, work cross-functionally, be able to drive both your growth and your team growth and, if you're wanting to see how they operate, test their willingness to provide support on something that's maybe less risky.
Speaker 1:
When you do something like that. You get to see if they show up as a coach, a judge or like an evaluator, and it's, I would say. The first thing is to find out what's important to them. Are they in to strategy? Are they about planning, decisiveness, collaboration, building consensus? Those are the areas where you want to develop and display your complementary skills and to work with them collaboratively. You also may want to showcase that you have a unique skill in any of those departments and that you have what it takes to be successful. Just make sure that you position yourself as an ally, not a threat.
Speaker 1:
I've seen many people weaponize and withhold their excellence until the boss was almost genuflecting and like trying to get it out of them. And, yes, that might work in the short term, but now most people just know that you're a jerk and that you're controlling. Again, listen to that episode on being a control freak. And now you're sort of a jerk in the department and if you do that, you're harming many of your relationships and the people report you because you're breaking trust. For the most part, your ability to perform is a key factor in creating a solid relationship with your boss. Your results yes, they are your results, but are you also being supportive of the boss, your peers, your direct supports? Are you keeping your boss informed? Are you finding ways to bring them in on things that they should know, to make them look really good? These are all the things that work for people at all levels. Be generous and assume that everyone has the best intentions and you may need some grace one day, and the more you give it to others, you'll also find that you will get it and have it extended to you and you'll be able to build much more mutually beneficial relationships.
Speaker 1:
Okay, the next I want to talk about is the boss's boss, that skip level. Depending on your organization, this may be the person who ultimately gives you your raise, who approves your professional development, who allows you to change roles, who approves the funding for you to get a coach. They are going to have a broad perspective on the organization and the pipeline. So how do you get to know them? Well, here are a few of the things that I've seen. I've also done personally. I help clients clients to stay successful.
Speaker 1:
First is be in the know. If you are in a meeting, make them know that you know what's going on within the organization, that you are also up on the latest trade news. You're up on the top clients, the top customers you have. This is going to provide you for fertile ground to be able to chat and to really be authentic in a conversation with them. If that leader has a public achievement, send an email and congratulate. We're all human. It's nice to be recognized. Also, depending on your culture, reach out to them. Make sure you mention your current boss's name so that they don't think you're jumping the box. You may even want to tell your boss after that you emailed the person Again. You're not asking for permission, you're providing air cover. But you could say you know, ask questions about the industry organizations. Or you know you're considering doing volunteer work and you notice that they're on the board of a volunteer organization. If they're professional development courses that you're considering taking, invite them to an industry event you're attending.
Speaker 1:
Think about ways that you can network and connect. This is not inauthentic. It's really thinking through your career strategy, what the strategy is of the company or the department of the business unit you're in and how you might be able to connect with that senior leader. This is where you start to really develop those relationships that, even if you don't stay in the job you're in and you move to another one. Being able to have these relationships throughout your career is key to your own advancement and it's how you manage up and manage up well. All right, friends, you can step into this bigger role by managing your mind and your emotions, getting clear on your strengths and being a really good partner to your boss. Friends, I always want to hear from you. If you have questions, if you have feedback. How are you managing your boss? Tell me, send me an email at hello at jillgriffincoachingcom, and I will get back to you. I appreciate you being here and I'll see you next time.
