A Love Story From 1990

SPEAKER_00 0:00

I'm ready to preach God's word. Are you ready to receive it today? The year was 1990. It was the summer of 1990. And I um I had met this girl who had dark, beautiful, flowing hair who had a certain tan working for that summer. Yes, I'm getting excited just thinking about this. She knew how to curl her hair just right so it flowed so perfectly. And uh we were we were dating, we had gone on a few dates, and we were talking about it last night. Some of our first dates were quite hilarious. And let me tell you, uh, single guys, I can give you a bunch of things not to do on your first date. Like don't bring your cousin. I'll just tell you that right now. That's kind of weird. Um, I can give you some good pointers, but I'm not gonna tell those in the microphone. And uh so we had been on a few dates here or there, and never really made any kind of serious idea of the relationship we were in or what was happening, but there was a certain Sunday night. My dad pastored in Grand Rapids for 35 years in the middle of that timeline somewhere. Urshana's dad took a church just a few miles from my dad's church, and uh similar church background, similar church history. Our families knew each other for generations and had led together nationwide events and nationwide structure of youth ministry, and so they knew one another very well, but when they moved to Michigan, it changed my life. And so we started dating here, there, and then there was a certain Sunday night. You know, we had two services on Sunday, and it wasn't an early service and it wasn't 9 and 11 like we have, it was a 10 o'clock Sunday school kind of a traditional service, and then we had what we called Sunday night church. And Sunday night church was for the crazy people, I will tell you that right now. And um, but after service, we would often meet, and I'll never forget, we we hadn't really initiated this idea of being serious, boyfriend and girlfriend, and moving the next stage of the relationship, which would include us courting towards marriage. But I would tell you this that she one of our friends brought her to my dad's church after their service, and our service was ending. And you know, summer nights are beautiful in West Michigan, the sun's setting, it's beautiful weather, and she got out of that car in the most perfect white dress with that tan working and that flowing hair working, and it was in that moment I was like, that girl, I'm gonna marry that girl. And uh this coming, this next week, next week, uh Friday will be 33 years since we tied the knot. But that is the year I learned like when you finally figure it out, don't delay. You better go ahead and put a ring on it. So why don't you turn to your neighbor and just say, we're about to declare something. And um go over to the other one you've been ignoring, just say, where are all the single ladies at? We're in the home stretch of this series, I declare, which is our marriage and relationship series. And as you know, I started out with marriage. I struck a chord there, uh started off with marriage, and now we have this retreat coming, so I can't wait. We've got some great stuff to share with you, but then I took a couple of weeks and we talked about speaking life into our relationships, and then last week, Small Group Sunday, we made this declaration. I declare I will invest my life in meaningful relationships uh that foster discipleship and growth. And I'm so excited to let you know today that I'm the number is growing every single day since uh Small Group Sunday, but we already have over 130 people registered into a small group this season. And how many know real relationship leads to real discipleship? And that means discipleship, that word, the root word of that is discipline, meaning when we get into relationship, um we start to develop disciplines that help us, and there's no way to uh be disciplined and not experience growth. You're gonna grow this season, and I'm so excited that we take this journey together. So that was last week. This week, uh I'm gonna direct my message today to all of the single people in the room. Single, young adults, students, you can garner as much as you can from this, but young adults and single adults, those thinking about the idea of being married someday. And couples, married couples, before you check out and think this is not for me, I want you to stay with me because I have some help that I need in this sermon in a little bit, and then I have some homework for you at the end. And so, how many know that even as married couples, we all know single people who need some help? And um and let me just ask you this how many of you that are married are so thankful you don't have to go out and participate and date in this culture of dating? Because it's not really it's not really like it used to. This is this is how this is how it used to be. Check this out.

SPEAKER_02 6:09

Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see.

SPEAKER_01 6:16

Are you a parking ticket? Because you got fine written all over you.

SPEAKER_02 6:21

Are you sure you're not tired? You've been running through my mind all day.

SPEAKER_01 6:28

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you and I together.

SPEAKER_02 6:34

They say Disney World is the happiest place on earth. Clearly, they've never stood next to you.

SPEAKER_01 6:42

Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? You spend so much time in my mind, I'm gonna charge you rent.

SPEAKER_02 7:00

Are you sure your name's not Netflix? Because I could just watch you for hours.

SPEAKER_01 7:08

Are you a library book? Because I'm ready to check you out.

The Soulmate Myth Exposed

Chemistry, Brain Science, And Judgment

Sacrificial Love Over Destiny

Dating’s Purpose: Evaluate For Marriage

Ruth, Boaz, And Don’t Settle

Write Your Dating Manifesto

Jesus-Centered As Non-Negotiable

What You Fish With, You Catch

Character Over Charm And Provision

Set Physical Boundaries Early

Cohabitation, Commitment, And Outcomes

Sexual Purity And Real Consequences

Relational Fit Over Physical Fit

Seek Wise Counsel And Accountability

Corporate Declaration For Dating

SPEAKER_00 7:14

Let's go. Come on. That's how we grew up dating. We didn't have to we didn't have to have our phone and learn how to swipe left or right or my god. It's not like, it's not like it used to be, that's for sure. And so today, what I want to do, singles and young adults, is I want to invest in your life, and I'm gonna share with you something that I don't think I don't think is being shared very much in your circles and to you, and it's gonna be a lot different, but it needs to be different because how many know if you do what everybody else does, you'll end up where everybody else ends up. And it's no wonder that our divorce rates are skyrocketing and the marriage rate is the bottom is dropping out of it. There's less adults married now than ever before, and there's more divorce than ever before. And um, I just want to speak into your lives, singles and young adults, and give you some tools and maybe a strategy to help you. This is the declaration I would ask you to make at the end of the service if you feel compelled. It's this this year, with God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare that I will pursue a godly path in dating. I realize if I date like everyone else, I will end up like everyone else. So I will honor God above all in my dating and relationships. So let's just dive right in. I'm not even gonna waste any time talking about anything else. Number one, the godly path of dating. Number one, be realistic about dating. Be realistic about dating. And a few years ago, a professor from Rutgers University did a survey and a study, and the results that were produced out of this study uh determined the number one thing young adults, young college females were looking for in a future spouse, and it was a soulmate, was the number one thing. And can I just tell you today, I'm gonna break the soulmate myth for your life today. And I'm gonna actually go back and give you the origin of the soulmate, and the reason why it's a myth is because it comes from mythology. You see, Plato, uh the philosopher, he believed in Greek mythology. And he believed with Greek mythology there was there was this group of superhumans and the superhumans, uh, not the Greek gods, but the next level, the superhumans, they were made up of a male and female gender in that superhuman. And when the Greek gods realized how powerful this connection of superhuman, of male and female gender would be, they split them in two and separated them. And Plato believed if those two ever found each other again, they would be the perfect match under heaven. It's a myth. It was all developed over a myth. And so when you say, I'm looking for my soulmate, you're actually looking for a myth. And and the reality, the term that you're really saying is you're looking for chemistry. And you're gonna say, PC, you just don't know, like when he picks me up and opens the door for me, and I get in that car, and PC, when our song comes on, desperado. Like, no, it's it's chemistry. And do you know what happens when you start to experience chemistry as you get connected to someone of the opposite sex and emotions start to flow? Let me tell you what starts to happen. You lose your mind. You don't think right, you don't make good decisions, you you're not, there's just there's just nothing good that can come out of the fact when you start to make decisions off of chemistry and off of emotion. In fact, um there was a study done, and uh her the the doctor's name, her first name is Phyllis, and she did this study, and and she actually took some pictures uh of what happens, her name was Helen Fisher, actually. When she when she did this study, she took some pictures of what happens to your brain. And the first picture I'm gonna show you is a married couple for 10 years, 10 years or more married, and this is the cognitive brain function, the green is the cognitive brain function of a married person who's been married for 10 years or more. There's a lot of good cognitive activity happening, sound judgment, good decision making, good conversations. Then they she took a picture, uh uh they they scanned the person who was married eight months or less, and this is that person. Their cognitive ability in the first eight months of marriage is this. In fact, there's there's young couples who have been interviewed, and they'll say, tell me, just a few weeks into marriage, what is the number one weakness of your spouse? And they say, Oh, he has no weaknesses. Marriage is wonderful, it's the greatest thing of my life. No, no weakness. He is like, I guess you could just call me one of the lucky ones. Because I've married Mr. Perfect, and everybody in this room knows that person does not exist. In fact, the reason why couples do that is because this is the cognitive scan of a person who once you have introduced sex into the relationship too soon, there is your cognitive ability to make a decision. You thought I was joking when I said you lose your mind when you make when you experience chemistry the first time, you literally do lose your mind. You do lose your mind. So you need to be realistic about dating. You see, the world's path to dating focuses on getting and keeping, but overlooks the importance of evaluating. So, what that is, is this is why the soulmate myth is is such a thing that you need to be aware of. Because when this is the myth that when I find my soulmate, then everything's finally going to be great. But what do you do when it's not? Because I can promise you it might be great until you've put a ring on that finger, and then you've walked down the aisle, and every married couple in the room can tell you something changes. When you leave that chapel and you come home from the honeymoon, and how many know the honeymoon doesn't always last for a year? Why? Because there's this because real life happens in relationship and in covenant, and the myth is that everything's gonna be okay, and what happens when it doesn't. So the the reality is that in Ephesians 5, it tells us, and I shared this message a few weeks ago, that the re the the way a real relationship works is through sacrificial love and mutual submission. Not so much finding that perfect soulmate. Because God actually gives you a choice about who you're gonna marry. Aren't you thankful for that? Like in the old day, like dating's only really been around about a hundred years. In the old day, it was either prearranged for you, or it was it was just just you didn't really get a choice. It was just, it was all taken care of. And so now you do have a choice. And so your dating focus should be discernment instead of destiny, right? You gotta learn how to evaluate. Okay, so let's check this out. Let's go to number two. Number two, you need to know the purpose of dating. So here's the dating myth. A lot of young adults, a lot of people I talk to, why are you dating? Oh, we're dating to have fun. We're just dating to have fun. Just fun, PC. We're just dating to have fun. The word you're not using because it's a little maybe more not appropriate, is you're actually dating for pleasure. And that is the myth of our life that we're dating to be satisfied, to be to find pleasure. And you can change the names and faces over and over again, and you keep looking and keep looking. And if you're only dating for pleasure, you're gonna run out of faces. Because this is what happens. You start making decisions in every one of these pursuits and every one of these relationships, and you may be thinking, Well, I'm just this is just now, I'm just having fun now. Someday I'll settle down. But just right now, I'm just having fun. And the reality is what you need to know is your present, meaning your right now, never stays in the past, it follows you into your future. And so you're you're gonna actually be a collection of of the decisions you made in this season of your life. And I can tell you that there is this space of like, man, there are I thank God I found Urshana when we were young. We got married, we've only had one another as a partner for our entire life, and I'm thanking God I don't have to compare her to anybody else. Because I made decisions that allowed us to have that relationship. And so you're not just dating for fun, and and you need to understand every married person will tell you this that your past follows you where you go. And so you need to learn this. The purpose of dating is to only evaluate and find a mate. So when you're dating, you're evaluating and finding a mate. Um it's interesting to me, Matthew 7.14 says that narrow is the path that leads to life, but wide is the path that leads to destruction. And so, singles, what I want to encourage you is to take the narrow path. Take the narrow path towards your dating relationship. And why is that important? It is important because it it you need to have the discipline of the narrow path that leads to life. So let me just tell you, don't fall in love with someone who's not marriage material. Because the reality is you're gonna you can find somebody. The problem won't be finding somebody, but you don't want to just find somebody, you want to find the person that you can spend the rest of your life with. So I have some homework for you, ladies, especially, guys, read the book of Ruth and read how Ruth waited for her redeemer, for the person that had the capacity and was marriage material to redeem her family heritage. And it was a process, and she waited for her Boaz. And what I would tell you is, ladies, don't get impatient and just fall in love with anyone because you're gonna miss out on Boaz, but you might find one of his cousins. And I found this on the internet, I thought it was pretty good. Boaz is spelled B-O-A-Z, right? Everybody, Boaz. And so the idea is this: while you're waiting on your Boaz, don't settle for any of his relatives like Brokaz, Boaz, Lion Az, Cheatin' as cheap as, and especially his third cousin, lazy as. Because, ladies, you need to wait on your boaz and make sure he respects yoaz. You don't put it's not the pleasure you're looking for, it is the purpose. And so, number one, be realistic. Number two, know your purpose. Number three, write a dating manifesto. Now that sounds, listen, this is you're like PC, we don't write stuff down anymore. I'll just think about it. No, you need to write it down, and you need to write it down and have it in your journal, have it on the mirror of your bathroom, have it in the closet when you get dressed, have it in the visor of your vehicle, when you look in the mirror to check how you look before you go into some a meeting or on a date. You need you need to have this manifesto written because you need to have a plan of action for when you start experiencing all the other feelings and emotions of dating. And if you don't have a plan, I can tell you you're gonna end up in somebody else's plan. And it might be out of the timing and design that God has for your life. So you need this manifest so that it will help you wait and walk on that narrow road. And I want to just give you some ideas of what you should put in this manifesto. Number one, the very first thing you should put is I it my number one requirement of the person that I date, and especially the person that I marry, is this person will be Jesus centered. Um I know you think it should be looks and attraction, and that's important. I'm gonna tell you, it is important because you wanna. Actually, enjoy being together for all the years down the road. But looks and attraction cannot be number one because attraction can be number your number one distraction. Meaning, you get so caught up in the looks and the attraction of it that you're gonna forget everything else that you had thought about. And you'll make concession for the quality and character issues that you see plainly, but you're blinded by the attraction. And that attraction is gonna fade as the years go by, and those character flaws and quality issues are gonna rise. And that's why we get into a spot where we don't fall out of love, but we fall out of the practice of loving, is because we overlooked so many things in the beginning when we could have had when we really had our minds to help us. We didn't use the opportunity to do that. So, you know, I want to just encourage you. What is it? Don't just just because they say they're Christian on the dating app doesn't mean they're Christian. So I would say, even in terms of when you fill out your profile, don't just say you're Christian, you're Jesus-centered. And when you find somebody that you're connecting with, you need to ask them. Don't ask them if they're a Christian. Ask them, what does it mean to you to follow Jesus? And they've got to be able to deliver an answer that is acceptable to you, to the path that you're walking on. Like it's gonna be like down the road when you're thinking about raising your children in church and you haven't had that discussion at the very beginning, and you wonder why life is hard together as a husband and wife. There's so many things you can do in advance of that moment to be prepared and to be ready. And so this is where I need some help from married couples. If you've been married for 10 years or longer, stand up, please. Husbands and wives, stand up together. You've been married 10 years or longer. What are you standing up for? All right, just quickly, if you've been married 10 years or longer and you disagree with me that the very first priority should be a Jesus-centered person, and then you may sit down. Look, not one of them is that well done, well done, married couples. You pass the test, you may be seated. Look, it is so important. It is every decision you're making, it is every principle and value of the house you'll establish. And it all comes from being Jesus centered. Now, there are people in the room that may not be Christian and think, I'm not sure about that, but let me just guarantee this is the sure way to developing a foundation that will last through every single storm because Jesus says the foolish person builds their house on the sand, the wise person builds his house on the rock, and when those storms come and the rains come and the winds come, the person that builds their house on the sand, it will crash and fade. But the one that built their house on the rock will stand forever. And Jesus is that rock. When I go fishing, I catch the kind of fish that I am baiting on the hook. Right? So if I want to catch bad, I use a hook or a baby. That is the bad light. So ladies, if you're fishing with your body, don't be surprised when you catch a bad boy body tonight. Don't be surprised. I don't think you can be Jesus centered and chase somebody that's fishing with their body. I don't have time to go in the scripture. But Proverbs, the wisest man in the world, Solomon, he delivered this message to his son. He said, Don't go down the path of a wild woman. I'll just use the word wild there. I think he used another word, but of a wild woman. Not only don't go down her path, don't go by her street, don't go by the window, just cross and use the other side of the of the neighborhood instead of going down her street. Because it is that important for you to understand what you see and how it affects you. So I just want to, this is what you're looking for. This guy, this is what you're looking for. First of all, guys, I I'm calling on you guys to stand up, to be men, to lead strongly, not be driven by passion and lust, but to lead a godly life with godly character so that you can lead a godly established home. So, guys, you're looking for a psalm, a Proverbs 31, 30. Charm is deceptive and beauty does not last, but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. That's who you're looking for. And girls, this is who you're looking for. Acts 6 and 3. And so brothers select this is when they were when they were advancing the cause of the gospel. Men who are full of the spirit and of wisdom who can handle responsibility. I was talking about it with the boys yesterday. You don't necessarily have to have a job to get married. You don't have to have a job to fall in love. But if you decide you're gonna live your life together, you gotta find a way to have a job and provide. And and everything changes. And so you have to have an understanding of walking in responsibility as you pursue your life together. So though dating must have number one, the requirement is a Jesus centered person. Number two, I my physical boundaries will be I'm gonna tell you what, if you don't plant these physical boundaries in your mind and in your heart and in your spirit, when you get into a moment, if you're not prepared, you will realize you've gone right past the line that you would have created had you thought about it in advance. And I just want to encourage you to actually think about it in advance and to draw a line. When I was a youth pastor for a number of years, I became known as the date Nazi. Because I actually preached against students dating exclusively through high school. And I did this not because I was against dating, but I was against what happens when two people date for a long time together from a young age. And emotions get in the way, and physical things lines get crossed, and and and and all of these things happen out of order, and so I became known as the date Nazi. But the reality was I used to say this don't don't ask when you make the line, don't ask yourself how close can I get to the line? You put the line as far away as you can, and then you make a decision to not get near it at all. Because here's here's the thing there there are some boundaries that you need to establish in your life. And and I know there's the culture is so different. And I know I'm 55, I'm an old soul, I'm old-fashioned, but listen, living together before you're married is not the way to decide if you can live together as a married couple. Would you get on that plane? No way. And you know what? That's what happens. The divorce rate, as high as it is in our nation, goes up even higher to almost 80% for people that live together before they're married. Because when you're living together with without a covenant, there's an easy escape route. And so you're never living fully committed. And then when you decide to get married and tie the knot, now you don't have a way out except for abuse and moral failure. By the Bible, it says there's whatever God has put together, don't let man break apart. And so if there's abuse and moral failure, then yeah, we'll help you get out of that marriage. But if you're just fighting and bickering and not getting along, the Bible's pretty clear, it says stay together. And so learning how to live together before you're married is not done by living together like you're married. And then you might say, well, what about sex, PC? Is it really that big of a deal? It is. It is. I know our I mean, let's our culture celebrates promiscuity and sexual pleasure, and they make it look so fantastic and wonderful outside of the context of marriage, but they don't ever show the reality of what happens every single time you connect with a person on that level. It is more than physical, there's an emotional tie, there's a spiritual tie, and and you you actually give a piece of your life away every single time you engage yourself in a physical sexual act. First Thessalonians, Paul writes, it is God's will that you should be sanctified and that you should avoid sexual immorality, that each of you should learn to control your body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the pagans who do not know God. So all I'm saying is, young adults, as followers of Jesus, you do have a higher standard to live by. I don't, I didn't have I don't have it, but I I have this illustration where two pieces of paper are glued together. And when you try to separate what's been glued together, it does it you can't cleanly tear the part the papers apart because they were one being glued together, and when you try to tear them apart, they each take something with, and that and that's what happens. That's what happens. That's why Paul said in First Corinthians, he says, sex is the only sin that is a sin against your own body. I mean, you're still forgiven. Listen, if you're living together right now and you're not married, listen, I'll do a ceremony. You can go to the the clerk, the county clerk, and get a marriage license. I'll do the ceremony in my office or in the lobby to marry you right away. Now we're gonna have to counsel you a little bit because you're gonna have to kind of turn the clock back a little bit. But if you're living together and you're not married, I want to encourage you to get married. But I definitely want to tell you stop having sex. And if you're a young adult, single person, uh a young uh a single adult in this room, not married, and you're having sex, you need to stop. Well, PC, that's just old-fashioned. Yeah, it is, but it's also a scripture. And as sometimes as followers of Jesus, we actually need to live by the word of God. So it's worth saving it. In fact, it's been proven over and over again, over and over again, it's been proven in studies that the people who enjoy sex the most are people who are having sex in the context of a marriage. And I know what you're thinking. You mean my mom and dad? Yes. Take that one home to brunch. Yes. Because it is it is the way God intended it. And when you experience life the way God intended it, it's always more life. No couple I've ever counseled said, PC, the problem with our marriage is that we both waited to have sex before we were married. I've never counseled that person, but you know who I've counseled? The couple that was like we we lived wild in our youth. We had multiple partners. And I've had to just walk them through learning. What I tell you, what I would tell you is if you're having sex right now outside of marriage, stop and start a second virginity. Be a virgin again. Oh, here's another myth I'll break for you. I know I'm preaching long today, but this is important. Um, here's another myth about dating. It here's the reality. The reality is you are sexually and physically compatible with millions and millions and millions of people. But you are there are very few people that you'll be relationally compatible to. And don't confuse the two. That's why it's evaluating and finding having Jesus centered because all the other. I mean, sex is not that hard. Kids, teenagers figure it out. Think about that. It's not that big, it's not that, but it is, it's a life changer. The last thing, so someone Jesus centered, physical boundaries, the last thing is I'll require confirmation from godly people. Proverbs says, Plans fail for a lack of counsel, but with many advisors they succeed. Now, I just want to tell you, young people, single people, like have it in your manifesto, have this idea that you're gonna seek the counsel of people who are happily married for 10 years or more. Uh, don't don't necessarily discount the fact of people that have been married 10 years or less, but they're still learning. I mean, our some of our biggest like biggest moments in our marriage where we had to really learn was between years seven and ten. And we thought we had it all under control. We thought we were on easy streak, and then our bad decision and world upside down, and we had to figure it out all over again. And I would just tell you have godly counsel, and this is your homework for you, those of you that are married, especially those of you that are married 10 years or older. Be willing to counsel with people and help our singles be accountable to finding the right person. Because you know what? Sometimes we can see it before anybody else sees it. Like, I don't know about that person. And listen, we trust the Holy Spirit to guide us, so have somebody that can help you find the right person. So here's the declaration. Well, yeah, let's do this. Say this with me. This is singles, say this declaration with me. If you mean it, we'll put it up on the screen. Are you ready? This year, with God's help and the power of the Holy Spirit, I declare that I will pursue a godly path in dating. I realize if I date like everyone else, I will end up like everyone else. I will honor God above all in my dating and relationships. Amen. Let me take it one step further. And that is, um, I felt challenged as I was closing this word to challenge some of you. And to challenge you, if you're in a dating environment, you're single, I want to challenge you to date God for a year. You know, I was thinking about this, babe. You counseled somebody whose life was upside down, ravaged by terrible relationships, in and out of marriages, and you challenged this person just to date God for a year. And I was thinking about that, of the growth that person experienced in that one year of time, and suddenly for a person that we had counseled multiple times for this different decisions on relationships now began to flourish in relationships. And so I just want to challenge singles. I don't know how many are out there. I man, I think if we got to 10, that might be incredible. But maybe 20 or 25 of you that would commit to a one-year date with God and not actively date anybody else inside of that one year. That's a big commitment, but I feel challenged to do it. And so if it's not you, don't you don't have to commit if it's not you, if you don't feel the Lord drawing you into this. But what could you do with that one year of dating God? Number one, you could enroll in Bible college. Our friends lead People College, it meets right here on Tuesday nights. We can get you enrolled in that. Your life will be changed. You could um serve like crazy. You're gonna be, you don't have to stay out late on Saturday nights, so you get home early, you get up early on Sunday and serve like crazy. You could read, well, I think you could probably read six to ten books if you weren't actively dating somebody, pursuing dating, and having to go out on all those dates, you could probably read at least six to ten books in a year. Some of you might be more, some of you, six might be like a world record for you. And then you can actually, you know what you can do with the money you're saving from dating is begin your retirement saving now. Because if you'll save about 2,000 over the next time frame of years, you will retire like everybody else hopes to retire. It's just that simple. Date God. And this is what you if you so tap the disc around you, we should have that all set up, and there's a little profile for you to fill out. Just we're just gonna get your emails so we can connect with you and then ask you a couple of questions. But uh, Tyler and Skylar and I were talking about this Wednesday night, and we're gonna set up a way to follow up with all of you, even if you're adult, single, and you want to say, I'm in it, I'm gonna date God for a year. Listen, what's gonna change from now to a year? Well, if God has a design for the person that you'll find, that person's gonna still be there, but you're gonna be so much better. So let me pray for you. Father, I thank you for this moment, for your goodness in our life, for the way you've watched out for us. And I thank you, God, that you're moving us closer to you. And I pray for every single, every young adult, Lord, don't let this be a message that brings shame or guilt, but let it be a challenge to live after your word in a better way. In fact, as you keep your eyes closed, your head bowed, I'm gonna ask for just two things. Number one, if you feel like you need to just make a commitment to a stronger value of purpose in dating, and maybe you've just been out of alignment living together or having sex before marriage, and you just want to start over. I'm just gonna ask you to pray this prayer with me and let it be a prayer that you pray as a way to start over. A second virginity, a decision to be pure and holy in dating. And for those of you that have never made a decision to follow Jesus, this prayer is the starting point to the best relationship you'll ever be in. The Bible says, if you're if you confess your belief before others in Jesus, Jesus will confess your name before the Father. And really, the reality is it's the best relationship because you might, it doesn't mean life's gonna be easy, but you'll never be alone again. So I'm gonna pray this prayer. I'm gonna ask the entire church to repeat it with me. If it's your first time or if you're restarting a commitment to the Lord, it's so important. Let's pray it like we mean it. Dear Jesus, thank you for loving me and dying on a cross for my sins. Thank you that the blood poured out washed me clean, helped me to turn from my own ways, to follow after your ways, be the Lord and Savior of my life. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Come on, church, let's stand together and celebrate. Come on.