5 Daily Non-Negotiables We Do (Personal & Business)
Jul 05, 2024Episode 820
Kwadwo [QUĀY.jo] Sampany-Kessie
My wife Jamie is back and we discuss the five non-negotiables that we're working towards in both our business and personal lives. We talk about everything from daily movement to maintaining consistent social media presence.
My wife Jamie is back and we discuss the five non-negotiables that we're working towards in both our business and personal lives. We talk about everything from daily movement to maintaining consistent social media presence.
Welcome back to another episode of the Art of Online Business. As you can see, here I'm with my wife, jamie, who is also another Facebook ad manager in her own business, and we're going to talk about the five non-negotiables that benefit business and life and full transparency. These are things that we're working towards. Some we do well, some she does better, and some neither of us do well, but we'll share each of the benefits that they have on our lives and our businesses. By the way, if my voice is new to you, hi, I'm Quajo. I'm the host of the Art of Online Business, and you can find out more about me and where I came from in the show notes below, and also if you want to see Me and Jamie, my wife, here and you can't right now then head over to YouTube. There's a link in the description below where you can go and subscribe to the channel and watch this very video. So, the five non-negotiables, jamie.
Speaker 2:
Get started.
Speaker 1:
They are 30 minutes of movement, they are new conversations, they are meditation. Or for us because they are new conversations, they are meditation, or for us because Jesus, they're prayer and reading the Bible. They are 10 pages of nonfiction and posting on social media, and apparently they're daily. So let's talk about Break this down let's talk about 30 minutes of movement, starting with you. Icu is ultra consistent with this.
Speaker 2:
This one is super easy for me, actually, just because I have a background in exercise, science and wellness. I used to be a personal trainer, it's just. I used to have a business called Mamas Be Movin' where I was coaching moms online and in health, and so it's just something that I have made a habit of mine for years really. I was really active in all through my childhood with dance and sports, and it's just something. I love it. It's kind of like my, my mental health, my therapy is to is to exercise, to lift weights, and it's just. I've just made it a part of a part, and if I don't do it, usually Sunday's my rest day, but the rest of the days of the week I'm doing some kind of movement and if I don't do it I just feel out of sorts.
Speaker 1:
So how do you feel when you do do it?
Speaker 2:
I feel great. It's uplifting, it's I don't know. I feel like I got my sweat in. I feel stronger. I feel like I got my sweat in, I feel stronger, I feel healthy. I just you just feel good, right? I mean, exercise releases those good, feel good endorphins, and so it's just yeah, I just feel good. How about you?
Speaker 1:
I wish I was consistent as you.
Speaker 2:
You're getting better, though I'm getting much better.
Speaker 1:
So why am I getting better? Ever since I participated in this 90 day new you challenge at the beginning of the year, though, I've always like tried to be active and before I hurt my ankle, I used to actually walk a lot, like over 10,000 steps a day. But no, I started this body transformation challenge this year and it was so funny and disheartening at the same time when I started and what my coach told me after monitoring my food, because I had to like record my food intake like day in and day out for like three days. And my coach is like you're maintaining body weight, but for a man of your size 183 pounds or whatever, he's like you should be losing weight at what you're, at the calorie amount that you're taking in. So you need to go on a reverse diet so you can gain weight and increase your metabolism. And I was like what?
Speaker 2:
Yeah, we were both like what's a reverse diet? I've never heard of that.
Speaker 1:
So then I went online and found out that, oh yeah, it's for people whose metabolisms have been jacked up and they're super low because of excessive dieting over a long period of time and you've got to eat more food, and so I was like great, but I had an excuse at least for not achieving a summer six-pack. I was just about to lift my shirt up, but I guess that's too much for the podcast, remember when our daughter remember how your daughter used to do that.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I used to lift up her shirt.
Speaker 1:
He was born in China, right? But Jamie spoke Spanish with our daughter and she always used to lift up her shirt and say because, that's the word for stomach, so like belly. Anyway since having to track my macros and every week eat more of the right macros like protein, carbs and fat, I've noticed that I've developed new habits of being consistent.
Speaker 1:
And one of those is just moving. My coach is like you just need to move. If you just do 30 minutes of bike, you know, and 30 minutes of lifting, this will help you and you need to be consistent at it that we can measure how your body's responding to the increased calories, and on and on and on. And I have felt better, you know, like I felt stronger and I just feel better about my day, like I went biking this morning and I feel better, like I can get more done, like I already have gotten something done.
Speaker 2:
Right, I'm impressed by you that you like, if you don't get your workout in during the day, then you do it at night, which for me I have to do it in the morning, like first thing in the morning, or else in the evening. I'm just, I'm crashing, I'm just done.
Speaker 2:
And so he'll be like hey, hang out with me, and you know, let's, let's talk, let's watch something while I'm lifting weights and I'm like I don't know how you do this, because right now I just have zero energy left by the end of the day. But you have been really consistent. If you can't do it, then you're like, hey, I still, I got to get my workout in.
Speaker 1:
It's I do life tired. Evening workouts are just as tired as morning workouts. That's probably not good Sleep should be on one of these.
Speaker 2:
Sleep should be on one of these.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, working on that All right. So outreach and new conversations. This is one that benefits business Right and one that benefits business.
Speaker 2:
Right.
Speaker 1:
And one that we have both learned. I already gave a shout out to Brandy Mouse.
Speaker 2:
You did not yet.
Speaker 1:
Yeah, so these come from her. Maybe you heard it on her podcast, we did, but she told me during our last coaching well, many coaching sessions actually to get more consistent at the five non-negotiables, because after like 45, 90 days, like our business will never be the same and so outreach new conversations. What that looks like for me first, and then you. What that looks like for me is I'm actively trying to grow on Instagram so I, when somebody likes my videos, I go and DM them, getting better about that. Also, anybody that follows me that's new that has a public account. I start up a conversation and I've started up plenty of wrong conversations, especially because my keyboard since it's in Spanish, I feel like my keyboard is undermining my ability to type. Like I can't type anyway, Like I'm frequently typos, but like I feel like the Spanish keyboard doesn't help. Why?
Speaker 2:
don't you put it back in.
Speaker 1:
English, because it's annoying. It's a quick but To put it back and forth in English, and it's cool to have one in Spanish, I guess. But yeah, dming people and one tip that I recently started doing is Brandy's like leave voice notes instead of just messaging people, because anybody, now with mini chat you can just get an automatic message and then it could be a marketing team member or something.
Speaker 2:
Right.
Speaker 1:
DMing. So a voice note let somebody know it's you.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, they really got to the source right. Yeah, okay, for me, my outreach has looked like basically just finding people on Instagram that I'm interested in. So for me, that looks like a lot of Question Well, I'm only interested in you. For me, that looks like a lot of well, I'm only interested in you. But you know what I mean. That's right. That's right For 15 years.
Speaker 1:
You sure it's 15?.
Speaker 2:
Yes, I am Okay yes you are. Last year, she wasn't sure. After a while like over 10, you kind of start getting a little mixed up. I was just happy as a husband.
Speaker 2:
We usually get blamed for not remembering anniversaries, and so maybe, maybe I've reminded you separately that I remembered our 14 year one, and you couldn't count yes, yes, yes, he's never gonna let me live that long anyway. By interested in, I mean more like topics, kind of what, what kind of people, what? What are people doing that that I'm interested in. So for me that's a lot of parenting stuff, because, lord knows, we all need some help with parenting.
Speaker 1:
Right, but they don't know that we have a five-year-old and an eight-year-old.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, we have a five-year-old, eight-year-old the elder child struggles with ADHD and so a lot of things that.
Speaker 1:
HD HD.
Speaker 2:
It's an inside joke.
Speaker 1:
Inside joke there's this guy named Steven, huh, yeah, and anyway, he's pretty funny. Anyway, keep going, keep going.
Speaker 2:
Anyway. So looking for you know parenting help, and then that led to oh, I could find other people. Our kids sleep through the night now, thankfully, but you know parenting, sleeping, you know doctors that help with sleep and child psychology. I've looked. I love music, so even like people who are giving guitar lessons and different things like that. What else have I looked at? I don't know, I can't even remember, but just finding different course creators and people who are doing things online and reaching out to them, finding their content, liking their stuff and then just starting conversations with them.
Speaker 1:
In the DMs, in the DMs, yeah, in.
Speaker 2:
Instagram DMs and this also looks like we're not spreading ourselves thin across a million platforms. This is also great advice from Brandy. I'm only focusing on Instagram. Some people maybe want to focus on LinkedIn or Facebook or email or whatever, but my focus, and I believe yours as well, is just only on Instagram, because if you're spread across too many different platforms, you're like where did I message that person? And it's just it's too confusing to keep switching back and forth and your brain will explode.
Speaker 1:
It's just, it's too confusing to keep switching back and forth and, yeah, your brain will explode. So I've learned recently to don't try to do too much because then you never feel like you're winning right. So like, lower the number of things that you try, the number of times you try to do outreach or start a number of new conversations you try to start, and that makes you feel better every day. At least it works for me right.
Speaker 1:
And it's surprising. Actually, people follow you and they have a reason for following you, and if you ask them, then they tell you Sometimes.
Speaker 2:
Can't see that, yeah right.
Speaker 1:
And you don't have to be like super salesy, but it's just like are you here to consume more content or are you actually looking for help inside your business Because I can serve you with one-on-one coaching or ads management or I have a course? Like I'm curious and they let you know. And yeah, I just had a conversation with one lady yesterday.
Speaker 2:
Yesterday.
Speaker 1:
No.
Speaker 2:
Yeah.
Speaker 1:
No, maybe not, I don't know, could have been yesterday, because yesterday was Sunday and she says that it started Friday actually. And she said that she was following me because she was. Her clients are always asking her about ads management. And I was like, oh really, and I couldn't put it together because her profile was like something completely different and I'm like, so connect the dots for me, because it sounds like you have a business, but your profile doesn't talk about that at all. And she's like, oh, this is my personal profile. And I'm like, oh, who is she? Though? Because her business isn't linked in her in her profile.
Speaker 1:
But, at any rate, I never would have known that this personal profile was connected to somebody who had a business or an agency with many clients asking them about ads, and she was maybe thinking of I don't know, we haven't gotten there yet but like getting help for me or partnering up with me in some way. So, ask, ask people at DMU. Yeah right, meditation, and this is one that we hear a lot about and, as Christians, for us, like meditation equals reading the Bible and praying.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, Meditating on the Word of God. Both of us, I think, have a pretty consistent habit of reading the Bible in the morning and praying A lot of times. For me I link together my movement and my prayers. So I'm prayer walking and that's kind of, so I can kill two birds with one stone, so to speak, and save on time and stuff. But I love it. I love being outside and walking and praying and yeah.
Speaker 1:
I think I'll do better at like laying in bed and reading the Bible and then going outside and walking and praying Though again, like exercise sometimes, the walking and praying or lifting and praying when I'm not watching my favorite show of late, the Titans on Netflix. It's true, though, I like to work out and watch the Titans, but I just feel better when I've prayed. It's like what was that one guy saying? You gotta know the creator. Yeah, know the creator.
Speaker 1:
Because, he created us and we're creative, so like getting God's word in my heart, in my mind, so I can actually think about it regularly and have my life be changed because of it.
Speaker 2:
Right, I like, as Myron Golden says. We listen to Myron Golden a lot too. I like to see, and he always says we're receiving orders from headquarters.
Speaker 2:
Orders from headquarters, and so when we spend time in the Word and praying in the morning, it's like we're receiving. Okay, god, what do you want me to do today? Help me to be aware of the people you want me to love on today, or reach out to. Or love on today, or reach out to, and just asking for him to lead your day, and yeah, especially when you need help with our kids.
Speaker 1:
It's like God, give me wisdom so I can be a good parent. Yes, 10 pages of nonfiction. Yes, this is a hard one because it's one that I don't do consistently.
Speaker 2:
We used to be really good about this and we've kind of left this one so you guys can comment and tell us how you're doing that. We're just like kind of sharing our hearts here and being open that you know we're good at some and we're not so good at others, and these are some goals for us and I feel like I've been saying for a long time that I want to get back into this habit of Sunday through Thursday nights reading and then, like Friday night and Saturday night, our weekends can be. We can watch something you know movie or show or something we like in the evenings or if we're hanging out with friends or whatever. But we need to, we need to encourage each other a little more. We got to be better, yeah.
Speaker 1:
Netflix is taking our time, but really it makes sense. Why would we spend time in front of a TV? Or we have a projector. Actually we don't have a TV, but this little projector, big old screen on the wall and watch other people's fantasy lives.
Speaker 2:
Ie TV shows.
Speaker 1:
Which are super entertaining. When we don't have the life we want yet, let's spend time reading. So we've got books here that we are kind of reading and want to read. This one is one that I like. It's called Exactly what to Say by Phil M Jones. And since writing, oh writing is just the bane of my existence, that's why I have this. I do not my existence. That's why I have this. I do not like writing. That's why I have this book, and I started reading it, even though so, jamie, you tease me a lot because I like to buy books.
Speaker 2:
He has stacks of books. He will just buy I don't know books at a time on Amazon and they show up at our house and I'm like, are you serious? Another stack of books and it's like, and then we just don't get around to reading them. So anyway. So the new rule is you must finish. I don't know at least is that the new? Rule. I'm making a new rule right now. You guys, I can all hold them accountable you must finish at least three books before you're allowed to buy any more books.
Speaker 1:
I think at least a one-to-one is good, you know. So the books motivate me kind of. It's nice to just buy them, but I do have lots of books. So this is one another one. Think Again that I am reading through by Adam Grant, and we'll link all of these up in the descriptions below what one do you got?
Speaker 2:
So I have several here. This one is Extraordinary, by John Bevere. He's a pastor and author, so this is a Christian book but definitely has lots of good stuff in it. And then all of like all these other ones I have, Boss Mom I have. We Should All Be Millionaires.
Speaker 1:
These are ones that I bought, by the way, so without my book buying addiction, you wouldn't have these books. Just gonna throw that out there.
Speaker 2:
This is true. This is true. We share a lot, which is good, but six figures in school hours, which is definitely helpful. Again, for me as a woman and a mom, a lot of these are like, yeah, how to have a business and be a good parent at the same time. It's actually us too and this one, the the Gain, also caught my eye for happiness, confidence and success. So, anyway, lots of tons of good books out there.
Speaker 1:
So is it mornings or evenings? How are we going to get this done? Does that mean like we're actually just going to do reading in the evening? It's in the evening, yeah.
Speaker 2:
In the evening it should be like 20 minutes or so before bed, and that's better for us anyway, right? All the research continues to show that we should turn off our phones and screens before bed and reading, and that helps to calm our brains and then maybe we will think about some of the things that we read while we're sleeping and wake up with. I don't know, you always wake up with ideas in the morning.
Speaker 1:
I always have ideas For better or for worse.
Speaker 2:
Always like hey, you want to know all the ideas I had at three o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 1:
Don't exaggerate on camera, love, it's not that bad.
Speaker 2:
No.
Speaker 1:
And my ideas are super good.
Speaker 2:
So you're lucky, I'm sharing them with you. They are good ideas, that's right.
Speaker 1:
Some of them are good ideas. Some of them 64%. Posting on social media is another daily non-negotiable that we both can get better at.
Speaker 2:
Definitely. Yeah, yeah, this is not one that I like. If I'm honest, this is probably my least favorite. All of the other ones, I can do this, but posting on social media, it's just so different in today's day and age, so to speak that I've never really done.
Speaker 1:
You don't normally hang out a lot with social media.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I mean, I, I consume some, but I just, I don't know, for me, putting myself out there is just it can be sort of intimidating, I don't know, and so I've decided to get a little bit silly with it. If you look at my Instagram, recently people seem to like videos of me dancing, and so I'm just kind of being a goof. It's Instagram.
Speaker 1:
You're a pretty lady. People like ladies dancing on Instagram.
Speaker 2:
Sometimes I feel a little bit silly or like when I'm running out of an idea. I'm like I don't know what to do. I'm just going to dance, you know. So anyway, this one is definitely more of a challenge for me. I might actually have to lower the bar on this one and say I'm going to post three days a week Monday, wednesday, friday or something like that until I get more consistent at it and I can do daily.
Speaker 2:
But I do try to batch it and do a couple at a time and save it, you know, so I can post it the next day. Because it's like if I'm already kind of in the mood and in the zone, then it's like I might as well record two or three at a time. But I don't know.
Speaker 1:
I don't know. I feel you're great at batching. You're just. Your brain is better because you've been used to doing things in the in-between moments when kids were both at home.
Speaker 2:
So in my social media, I have enough to post daily now, but it still takes time. It's more the time, but I feel like you're generally like you're better on camera or you've got more experience I love the camera or charisma, I'm just vain, no, but I mean also, though I've been doing this a charisma.
Speaker 1:
I'm just vain, no, but I mean also, though I've been doing this a lot longer than you, though you have. Since elementary Chinese and I guess maybe you do know or you don't know I used to teach Chinese to expats who lived in China and grew a YouTube channel to like 20,000-something subscribers and so, if you think about it, I've been on camera on that channel alone A ton 200 plus videos.
Speaker 2:
Yeah. Yeah, and then the art of online business, and so, like it's just, he used to always make videos and make me like lock myself with our baby daughter in the bedroom and be like I just need five more minutes to record another video. Keep her quiet. Yeah, keep her quiet. You know, and I'm like trying to nurse her, like do something so that she'll be quiet. I'm like can we get out of the room yet please?
Speaker 1:
Well, because I would record while you guys were gone and then you would come back too early and I wouldn't quite be-. No, because you'd be recording too long. I might Would have been done. But here's the thing Like, posting on social media helps your reach, Like, whatever platform we're on. We just got to feed the algorithm, unfortunately, and for me, the more I post on Instagram, the more new people I see that follow. Yeah, and also the better I get at posting and eventually like, if I'm looking for one of these posts to go viral, like you can't find that post until you post more, and so that's the five.
Speaker 1:
We are getting better at it, but I've seen more growth in doing these five things and feeling better about myself as I do these five things, which helps me show up better in my business and on coaching calls things which helps me show up better in my business and on coaching calls, and so I hope you, the listener, also can start to decide what five negotiables for you and they have to be for you.
Speaker 1:
Like, don't just take these five. Take five, I think they're good, but what? What ones for you? Make you a better business owner, get you more leads for your business and make you a better.
Speaker 2:
All right, Cool yeah more leads for your business and make you a better Mm-hmm. All right Helps with everything.
Speaker 1:
Cool, yeah, until the next time that you see me or hear from me, be blessed. See you in the next one.
