Misguided Vendors Who Discourage Couples From Hiring Wedding Planners

Lady Whistlewed is at it again! In her latest column she discussed the folly of wedding professionals discouraging couples from hiring wedding planners. Uncover the surprising motivations and the significant repercussions of this trend with Laurie Hartwell, CEO of the CWP Society, and her co-host Krisy Thomas, Vice President of the CWP Society. Together, they unravel the reasons behind this behavior, such as overlapping services and vendors seeking extra revenue streams, and discuss the importance of professional integrity. You'll learn how certified and master certified wedding planners can elevate the entire wedding experience and why collaboration is key to achieving excellence.

Listen as Laurie and Krisy highlight the benefits of forming strong relationships with wedding planners, and how pros can benefit from steady referrals in business, stressing the importance of each professional focusing on their specific role. Discover the supportive community of the Certified Wedding Planner Society, and explore the various membership levels, including free options for planners and other wedding pros. By fostering respect and collaboration, we can all contribute to successful weddings and build a thriving, supportive industry. Join us and be part of the loving CWP Society family today!

www.cwpsociety.com | info@cwpsociety.com | IG: @cwpsociety | FB: @cwpsociety

Transcript

Respect and Collaboration in Wedding Industry

Speaker 1 0:00

Welcome to the Wedding Planner Profiles podcast brought to you by the CWP Society. In this episode, they'll be examining the latest column from Lady Whistlewet, a prominent voice in the wedding planning community.

Speaker 2 0:22

Welcome to the Wedding Planner Profiles podcast. My name is Lori Hartwell, I'm the CEO of the CWP Society and I am here with my fabulous co-host and vice president of the CWP Society, Chrissy Thomas. Hey, Chrissy, how the heck are you?

Speaker 3 0:38

Hi, Lori, and hello to all of our amazing listeners. Well, guys, she's back. I took a little bit of time off, but she is back with a amazing column and she kind of came back with a vengeance A little bit. You know, she is rebuking some of the misguided wedding pros and vendors for something that I'm actually quite excited to talk to you about, Lori.

Speaker 2 1:03

Yeah, you know what she's talking about here is when we hear about wedding professionals discouraging their couples from hiring wedding planners, and this can really be very, very disheartening and, well, I can tell you, it breaks my heart. But what I can also say is that usually there's a reason behind it, and I want to make sure that I am speaking today on the reason why wedding professionals don't necessarily have to feel this way, and I would really like to encourage those wedding professionals who have been doing this in the past to, of course, immediately stop, but to maybe heal some of the wounds that have caused them to do this in the first place. Now, one of the reasons why I think maybe a wedding professional would do this would be maybe they have similar services that a coordinator or a wedding planner offers, and they're trying to convince a couple to hire them for all of those things, rather than going with someone who does nothing but dedicate themselves to that profession, and so I mean that could be it. What do you think, christy?

Speaker 3 2:08

I think that probably isn't a lot of times, and I get it. You know, people probably want to add onto their service, they want to think of an additional way to make revenue. But I've seen it on the flip side where there is already a planner hired and I've seen and heard of wedding pros going in and be like, well, you actually don't meet that wedding planner. This is something I offer and that's me kind of that's oh, that's almost a stab in the back a little bit, where it's like I'm already hired. Why are you trying to take my job away from me when I'm already hired? I get it. I totally understand wanting to kind of think of different ways to bring in a stream of revenue, but if that's something that you're doing, it's a little dirty in my thoughts.

Speaker 2 2:48

Yeah, I actually agree with you here because, honestly, nobody would ever want that to be done to them, and so, you know, we've always been taught do unto others as we would hope those would do unto us, right To me. That's my mindset all the time, and so for someone to kind of go out of their way and say, oh, you don't need them, I can do all of that for you, that is shady and that's underhanded and that, I'll be honest, karma does not usually play well to those types of people. So really try to make sure that if that's something that you're doing, it's not actually very becoming of someone who's supposed to be in the wedding industry. But what about those types of wedding professionals who you know? Maybe the planner hasn't been hired yet and maybe it's a venue or it's some other wedding professional who just says, oh, you know, you don't really need them.

Speaker 2 3:37

Now what is their reasoning here? Is it because they want them you know them to save the money and put it more towards their services? Or is it because they genuinely think that there is not room for a coordinator or a wedding planner in the space of the wedding industry? Either way, you're wrong, but I really want to make sure that we're encouraging everyone who's listening that if this is something you've done, or something that you do on a regular basis, I want you to get to the bottom of your why. What is your why? And maybe you need to surround yourself more with fabulous wedding planners, especially those who are educated, certified wedding planners or master certified wedding planners. Those are the ones, typically, that are going to give you a really wonderful experience and find ways to actually enhance what it is that you do as a wedding professional. So maybe what the problem is is you haven't ever been able to surround yourself with really great wedding planners or great coordinators that can help you in this way.

Speaker 3 4:42

I think that is. I think that is the one of probably the biggest whys is that they have worked with a lot of and I'm going to put it in quotation marks planners who maybe aren't really certified or educated planners. They could have just been the aunt of the groom who is stepping in as the role of the coordinator, which there's nothing wrong with that, but when I think about that, that typically means that person doesn't have that education behind them to know how to really be able to do a good job. And, like you mentioned, lori, part of a certified wedding planner's job is to make everyone on that vendor team shine. To me, that is like one of my biggest things a certified wedding planner is. When I think about my couples in their wedding day, they have hired every single person on that day thousands of dollars to be able to do a phenomenal job.

Speaker 3 5:27

As a planner, I want to make sure I'm giving them the groundwork to be able to do their job effectively. I want them to look as good as possible, and some planners may not have the same mindset. They may be running into planners who are difficult to work with, who don't get their input, who aren't players, and when you're doing that every single weekend. At this point you may be thinking let me just take the planner out of the equation altogether and tell my couples to not hire a planner. So I encourage you to really find those group of planners who you love working with, who are certified, who are educated, and when you find that it's going to, you're going to love your job so much more. It's magic. It is because planners want you to look good. They want you to be the rockstar wedding, the wedding pro that you are.

Speaker 2 6:14

You just got to find those people and you want, I want to make sure that we're actually flipping the script here too, because I want to make sure that wedding professionals see it from from my perspective and me not just seeing it from the wedding pros perspective, because you know, wedding planners on educated, certified, master, certified wedding planners uh, we run into and hear stories of terrible wedding pros all the time. I mean, this is a constant in our world and I do go out of my way to search out and vet wedding professionals. But I don't just say to a couple well, you don't need a photographer, I have a friend who can just snap some pictures. I don't say to a couple well, you know, no matter what kinds of bad experiences I have with DJs, even though I've got some amazing DJs, I mean some, you guys, when you find that amazing DJs, it's like I hear angels singing, you know what I mean. Like there's, there's a, it's a big deal, the sun shining, music, and I refer them over and over and over and over again. But if I run into a bad one, I don't just say, listen, couple, you don't really need a DJ, okay, I don't. I just never, would never say that when I'm looking at a venue.

Speaker 2 7:33

And let's say I had a bad run in with a venue. I'm not going to say to a couple you know what? You don't really need to hire a venue. How about we just go to a park? So it's not.

Speaker 2 7:43

It wouldn't be fair if I did that to a wedding pro. Why is it okay for a wedding pro to do that to a wedding planner? And so I really do want to make sure that you're always thinking about would you want this done to you? So we need to start treating people with a lot more respect, a lot more kindness, and we need to have an understanding of every single category of wedding professional, because we each have a role in a couple's world, and so that's why I would like to encourage every single wedding planner, every single wedding professional, every single wedding venue and the entire venue staff to really have a full understanding of every single role in the industry and have a level of respect.

Speaker 2 8:26

And instead of saying you don't need a and then fill in the blank, instead of saying that, say, well, tell me what it is that you're looking for specifically, and maybe I can refer you to a really great version of that. You know, that's what we need to be thinking of, instead of just saying you don't need them Because you know. If we go back to that original thought of maybe there's similar services, just because we have similar services you know some wedding planners also have rentals. That doesn't eliminate the need for a rental company Just because a wedding planner also maybe has a dance floor or does wraps or is an officiant?

Speaker 3 9:03

maybe they are licensed to marry people doesn't mean that they're going to completely eliminate having officiants off of their approved vendor list.

Speaker 2 9:12

And I'm also never going to say to a couple well, you don't need to hire your own person, I can do it, because here's the thing. I also know what it takes to be a wedding coordinator and a wedding planner and me splitting my brain into two different locations, of being a wedding officiant and the planner that day, can I just tell you that would be nightmarish, and so it is. Just, it's so much. Now I'll do it in a pinch. If, like, something happened to the wedding officiant that was hired and I have to step in and I happen to be a wedding officiant, I can do it, but it's not something that I'm going to try to convince couples of on a regular basis, just like I hope DJs don't convince a planner I mean a couple that they can do all of the things that a wedding planner does, because when you have to split your mind in two different ways, it can really cause a lot of trouble for yourself, not just the couple and not just for the industry. But it's all tied together, chrissy, it's all tied together.

Speaker 3 10:07

You really brought it home where, when you mentioned that it really takes us as wedding pros understanding each other's roles, and that's honestly why one of my favorite workshops that we host every month is our free wedding pro workshop, where it's not just planners on the call, it's officiants, photographers, bakers, content creators even, and we're all talking to one another, and I think sometimes that's all it takes is really understanding each other's roles.

Speaker 3 10:33

We, as planners, we get that privilege because we have our hands in every little detail, so we get to see that. But as a photographer, you may not understand the importance of the baker or why the baker charges what they charge. Or as a DJ, you may not understand the role that the videographer is going to play for that day. Having this forum and having this opportunity for us to all be a part of a workshop and a call allows us to really have those engaging conversations, understand each other's pain points, understand each other's struggles and figure out, okay, how can we collaborate better together, because ultimately, that is what it takes to make a successful wedding day is a collaboration of all these phenomenal wedding professionals coming together as one to create this beautiful day for our couples.

Speaker 2 11:20

That's right. We have to make sure that we're not stepping on each other's toes. We have to make sure that we leave space open for each other to do our jobs and to do it well. Now, when you have some people who do overlap work, okay. When there's a wedding pro that also does this, this, this and this right, like one of those all-in-ones.

Professionalism and Collaboration in Weddings

Speaker 2 11:43

As much as it sounds like, oh, that seems like it would make it easier, it actually doesn't, because that means that that one person kind of has to keep their brain in so many different categories and in different sections, almost Whereas I like when I'm on site, because I allow a photographer to just focus on finding those amazing and capturing those amazing moments. That's what I'm looking for. I want my entertainment provider to be able to focus solely on the entertainment and to be able to really have time to read the room and to read the couple and to see what we're doing and how the timing is going, and maybe they want to switch something up because of a vibe that they're getting. I want them to be able to focus on that so that they can really bring it all the way. I want them to bring their A game. I want my venue manager to be able to completely, 100%, focus on the venue and so that they can do their job and excel and just look like a rock star. I want my videographer to do the same. I want the baker to be able to do the same. I want the florist to be able to show up and focus just on the florals. That's a hard enough job. It's so taxing. It is almost impossible, in my opinion, to do both things. It would be one of the most exhausting things to be both. So I want to make sure that what we're doing is asking you, the listener, whoever is listening, if you have done this, if you've said no, you don't really need X, y and Z, because I can help you with that. I can do it. I need you to really dig deep and ask yourself why am I doing this, and is it the best thing for myself and for my business? Is it the best thing for my couple and is it the best thing for my industry? That's what we need to be looking at, and I can guarantee you that very rarely will the answer be yes to all of those things. It's just not so.

Speaker 2 13:36

Stop discouraging couples from hiring a professional planner or professional coordinator. It is not a good look, and one of the things that I loved that Lady Whistlewed touched on Chrissy is and this is not really the wording that she used, but I can tell you kind of from my perspective what this means to me. Wedding planners are the repeat customer to all of our wedding pros. When we hear you as a wedding pro say you don't need a wedding planner, you don't need a coordinator, if you think you're ever going to become one of our preferred or approved vendors, you're out of your mind. That would never happen. And so what are you doing? You're literally hurting yourself because I have the ability to send couples to you over and over and over again. Now imagine four or five amazing wedding planners and they're all doing that for you.

Speaker 3 14:34

When I think about if your why is, oh, I need an additional stream of income. Can you imagine, if you get linked up with planners in your area, the streams of income that would be coming in as of the constant referrals?

Speaker 2 14:46

There you go. There you go, then. Whenever you don't have to undermine someone else's profession, that's a win. You should never try to do that. And yet you're right Instead of undermining someone's profession, to get the income rely on the income that can come in from repeated business from a wedding planner. Now, maybe you know that maybe your services don't live up to the standards that wedding planners typically have.

Speaker 2 15:09

Well then, what should you be telling yourself? You should be telling yourself how can I step up, how can I improve my services, improve my offerings, so that I can be someone that every single wedding planner would look at and say I want to recommend them to every single one of my couples. And this can be in any category, by the way, it doesn't just fall on some of the main ones, like photography and entertainment. So we just have to make sure that you, as a wedding pro, are thinking to yourselves what can I do to get on these approved vendors list of these planners? Because they are going to be. I never have to pay for another dime of advertising because we, as planners, are referring you business non-stop. That's the position you want to be in, not the position of getting the reputation of talking negatively about wedding planners. That's a road I'm not sure you want to take a hike on. I really don't think it is. I would We'll be in the quicksand, we'll be in the road before you know it.

Speaker 3 16:08

Yes, but let's not do that. And you know, I really encourage our listeners because I know sometimes when I see things in forums and groups and on social media, it there, it can be a lot of negativity. And if you find yourself in that bubble where people and the wedding pros are talking negative about the other wedding pros in the area, in the market, I encourage you to come over to the CDOP Society, because that's one thing that we do not tolerate. That is the one thing that I encourage you. If you are looking for a more positive group of people to be around who's going to lift you up in whatever field that you're working in, please come and join us, because I see it and sometimes what happens with these people who are saying, oh, you don't need a wedding planner, they're good, they're surrounded by negativity.

Speaker 3 16:51

Yes, probably their mindset is well, everything's bad, everything's negative. So if you surround yourself with really positive people who respect and understand the role that you play in a wedding day, which is something really do here at the CWP society, I encourage you to be part of our free pro membership so, every single month, you can join us and we can lift you up and you can engage in these really, really great conversations that we're having with your fellow wedding pros. I just love it so much. I encourage you to be a part of that.

Membership Levels in CWP Society

Speaker 2 17:21

I could not agree with you more. And it doesn't matter what category you fall in. Every single category finds a beautiful home within the CWP society, because we really just value every category. We value the balloon artists, we value hair and makeup artists, we value wedding officiants, we value bakers and florists and entertainment providers and photographers, videographers, wedding venues it runs the gamut. We value you, we see you, and what we're trying to do on our end is educate planners on the best ways to see you, the way that you want to be seen, and we try to educate all the other categories of wedding professionals to really see and understand wedding planners, because until that is actually able to be done, we are going to keep stepping on each other's toes and we are going to keep spreading misinformation out there. And what does that do? That hurts our wedding industry. We cannot afford to have that happen. We have to step up y'all, because I feel like what we're doing is we're on the cusp of change in our industry and couples have more choices today than they have ever had.

Speaker 2 18:35

So yes, chrissy, I, I, I applaud you for saying that, because you know we do have the wedding pro membership, which is 100% free to planners, djs, photographers, videographers, bakers, officiants every single category. It is completely free and it will be free for the rest of their lives, and it has a lot of really amazing benefits in there. We also have the premium membership that includes so much, and then we have the certified membership, which includes the actual certification and lifetime free member benefits. So it is there's so many levels that you can actually join within the CWP Society. If you would like more information, you can visit certifiedweddingplannersocietycom or cwpsocietycom. Go, check it out and learn as much as you possibly can. We would love to welcome you into our amazing and loving family, where we lift everybody up and we never tear anybody down. We have to make sure that we're protecting each other. We need to be looking out for each other, so join free today. Thank you, chrissy, for joining me. I had a really good time talking about this. Thank you.