Natural English Conversation With a 5 Year Old

E124: Welcome, Plus Members, to a heartwarming episode of the English Like a Native Podcast. This edition is extra special as we bring you an impromptu conversation with none other than my adorable five-year-old, Jacob. Today's episode was born out of Jacob's unexpected day off from school due to a bout of illness, giving us the perfect opportunity to share his musings with all of you. Sit back, relax, and join us as we delve into the world of a five-year-old's imagination, from his love for monsters to his excitement about Christmas and his vivid dreams, I'm certain you'll find this episode absolutely delightful!

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Transcript

0:01

Hello Plus Member and welcome to this very special edition of the English Like a Native Podcast. It's special because I have my favourite person or one of my favourite people in the world here talking to me today. So here is a very unplanned, impromptu conversation with my poorly five year old Jacob who has taken the day off because he was sick last night, so he didn't go to school, which means I'm not able to work, which is why we have this very special edition. So, sit back, relax, and listen to the musings of a five-year-old. Hi, Jacob. Hi. How old are you, Jacob? Five. You're five. I love monsters. You love monsters. Is it good to be five? Yeah. Yeah? You're very strong. You're very strong when you turn five, are you? Do you have big strong muscles? Yeah! Yeah. Do you have to do lots of exercise to get strong muscles? Uh huh. Jacob, what kind of exercise do you do? Uh, I do press ups. When do you do press ups? At gymnastics. Do you like going to gymnastics? Yeah. Yeah? You didn't go today though, did you? Uh, no. Why not? Because I was feeling sick. Because you were feeling sick? So you didn't go to school today either, did you? No. No. What do you like most about school? I like my lunches. Your lunches? What do you get on Fridays? I get fish and chips. Ah, is that a good one? Yeah! Yeah, your favourite meal, fish and chips? Mm hmm. Mm hmm. What do you do at school other than have lunch? I like to see my friends after lunch. You go and play in the playground? Yeah. What kind of games do you play? Monsters. You play monsters? How does that game work? So, you have seven people and one of them is a monster. One of them is a monster? So, they have to chase a monster and I have to chase them back. Oh, so you're always the monster, are you? Uh huh. Why is that? Because I practice my roars every day. Because you practice your roars every day, do you? Mm-hmm. Yes, I know. They are really clever. Do you want to hear one? Go on, then. Hrrrrrrr! Mmm, that's more like a hiss than a roar, isn't it? That sounds like an angry cat. But, d'you want to hear a really, really, really, really scary one? Hrrrrrr! Wow. Yeah, that's super scary. Are you excited about Christmas? Yeah! Yeah? We even got our Christmas tree up! Yeah, who loves our tree? You and me, and who else? Caspian and Daddy. And who else? Our cat. Our cat Sox, he loves our tree, doesn't he? Yeah? What does he do to our tree? He knocks it down like this. Huff! Yeah, he tries to climb up it, doesn't he? He knocks all the baubles off, he tries to eat the lights. I'm really excited about seeing Father Christmas soon. Yeah, we have to like, write our letters. We do have to write our letters. What are you going to write in your letter to Father Christmas? I'm going to write a robot spider that can climb up walls and make webs, even it can stick on top of a ceiling and it can shed its skin and it can crawl on the ground and it can even do laser eyes. Wow, that's an impressive toy. Santa will be really hard pushed to make a toy like that, I think. Hmm, maybe you could ask him for something a little bit easier? Yeah. Yeah? Do you automatically get a toy or do you have to be... Nice. You have to be nice, hmm. Oh, you took the words out of my mouth. So, do you think you're naughty or nice? Thumbs up again. So does that mean you're nice? Yeah. Yeah. I'm really helpful. You're very helpful. Do you like helping people? Yeah. And I love you. I love you too. When you grow up, what do you want to do? A scientist. You want to be a scientist? Uh huh. Yeah? What's so good about being a scientist? Uh, scientists can make stuff and, they can make stuff like, anything. Yeah? Helpful stuff? Yeah. Yeah? Like, um... I'm going to make everything I wanted to make. What kind of things have you made before? I made a van. You made a van? Yeah? Okay. What else did you make? I made a tree chopper with only one eye. A tree chopper with only one eye. Yeah, that was good, that one. You like drawing as well, don't you? Yeah, and I cut one out. You cut out a drawing? What was it? You know it. Tell me. It's a monster. Oh, a monster. Is it a scary monster? Yeah. It's called Lots of Legs. You know Lots of Legs. Oh yeah, I remember. I dreamt about blood lizards once. You dreamt about blood lizards? Was that a horrible dream? Yeah. They have black bodies on the outside and their scales are red. Their scales are red. And do you know how long their tails are? Go on. About as long as this studio. Oh my goodness, that's a huge lizard. And do they drink blood? No, they eat a whole person. They eat people? Uh huh, even their bones. Oh my goodness me, they've got teeth that are really strong then. Yeah, and guess how big their teeth are? Go on. About as big as our house. What?! That sounds super scary. Are these real or have you made them up? Made them up. Oh. Phew. Thank goodness for that. I make stuff up in my dream. You make stuff up in your dreams, do you? Yeah. Oh, okay. About bad things. Oh, and then what happens when you have a nightmare? I dunno what to do with it when I just go back to sleep. I have another nightmare. Yeah. We have to learn to blow those nasty thoughts away, don't we? But that doesn't help. That's where you come into my bed, isn't it? Mm-hmm....for a cuddle. Because I'll beat those monsters up. I'll say, get away from my baby. But, when I go to sleep after that blood lizard dream, I dreamt about a really scary one that can eat a person in just one big gulp. Oh baby. But you know that they're not real, don't you? But it's called a giant cracker. Oh dear. And do you know what that means? It means that that giant cracker is a monster that cracks stuff and then eats it in just one bite. And he likes to eat your eyeballs. Oh my goodness me. If people are listening to this conversation now and they're feeling scared about this blood sucking lizard that crunches people's bones, what are you going to say to them if they're feeling scared? It's alright. It's alright? How can you make them feel less scared? Giving them a giant big hug. You want to give them a giant big hug? I love you. I love you too. You want to say goodbye to everybody? Bye bye. And that is all for today. Thank you so much for listening and thanks again to Jacob for joining me. Until next time, take very good care and goodbye.