Olivia Rodrigo's The Cure & Obsessed: Vital Biblical Truths About Self-Love & Relationships

In this solo Radiating Faith sermon, I use Olivia Rodrigo’s songs The Cure and Obsessed (along with reference to her album You Seem Pretty Sad For A Girl So In Love) as a modern doorway into a deeper Biblical conversation about love, insecurity, sexual shame, mental health, and the search for healing. These songs capture something many people struggle with quietly: the desire for romance to fix what is broken inside us, and the painful obsession that can come from comparison, jealousy, and sexual history in relationships. 

I talk honestly about my own experiences trying to “be the cure” in past relationships with women who struggled deeply with anxiety, depression, self-harm, suicidal ideation, and insecurity. Through those experiences, I learned that romantic love can comfort someone, but it cannot become The Cure or the antidote, nor the salvation and healing they need. A boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, or wife can bless your life, but they cannot replace Jesus Christ, the Word of God, or the deep healing that comes from knowing you are loved by your Creator. 

This sermon also addresses Biblical dating, sexual purity, covenantal love, pornography, social media comparison, and the emotional wounds created when sex is treated casually instead of sacredly. I discuss how Scripture gives us a prevention guide for many of the mental and relational wounds people are carrying today, while also making it clear that this message is not about shame. It is about redemption, accountability, restoration, and becoming a new creation in Christ. 

If you have struggled with romantic trauma, sexual regret, jealousy, insecurity, comparison wounds, or the belief that another person can finally make you whole, this episode is for you. Relationships are beautiful when they honor God, but they become dangerous when they become idols. The real cure is not being chosen by another person but rather, it's being rooted in Jesus Christ, renewed by Scripture, and learning to love yourself because God already does. 

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Transcript

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to Radiating Faith, the ministry sub-series on the A Couple O' Nukes podcast. I am super excited about today's sermon. It is much like my previous few sermons. It was just an inspiration that, you know, it just happened in the moment, and it was something untraditional. I really enjoy preaching, not straight from scripture, still using scripture, of course. Without the Word, you can't be preaching that. But- Using different themes and modern-day happenings to relate back to the Word. And I don't believe in overly Christianizing everything, for lack of better words. But again, everything is the result of God, and it can all be tied back to Him both good and bad. Not tied to Him in a way of blame, but in understanding how this world works. Now, for the past few years if someone asked me, and, and many people had asked me my opinion on Olivia Rodrigo, I always said, "I don't know who that is." I genuinely did not know who she was. I knew that she was a singer maybe. I just knew that she was some kind of celebrity. A younger woman. Had never heard a song or seen an interview or anything. And about a few weeks ago, someone sent me one of her songs, The Cure, one of her newest songs. It was a precursor to the full album, which I believe is called You Seem Pretty Sad for a Girl So in Love. And it has been amazing because I went to release the sermon, and then I never got around to recording it 'cause I headed to Japan and I was busy. And then she actually released a whole album, which I didn't know there was a whole album coming. I thought The Cure was gonna be a single. And I got to enjoy listening to the whole album yesterday at the time of recording. I actually went through every single song, and just amazing. Now, this is an endorsement for, this is not, you know, supporting Olivia Rodrigo with any comments she may have made politically or religious-wise or anything like that. I don't know anything about her in that regard. All I know is her voice and the songs I listened to, which were absolutely beautiful. A lot of them were heartbreak, bittersweet, breakup, or love. And a lot of them actually hit me pretty deeply, and I was really moved by them. And I've been listening to a lot of them pretty much on repeat. Because any time I discover a new musician, you know, it's like kind of, kind of binging that stuff for a while, and then move on to whatever discovery comes next, you know? And so The Cure was the one I was really listening to probably every day once minimum, and that was what inspired the sermon, compounded with listening to her one song, Obsessed. And then her album isn't really necessarily a part of anything we'll be discussing today, but those other two songs are definitely the inspiration for the sermon. They were really powerful Now that being said, I found basically when I was listening to The Cure and Obsessed, which we can't play them here because of copyright stuff, I can't even technically sing them to you, and I would not sing them as well as Olivia Rodrigo. Maybe I would be good, but not to that level. But they were songs that really hit me deeply, specifically The Cure. And not to make it sound like I am a white knight or a hero or anything of that kind, but a lot of the relationships that I was involved with in the past were with women who had a lot of mental health issues. And I mean, levels of anxiety that were to the point of hospitalization and crippling to the point of not being able to leave the house, of not being able to go into the store if there were too many people. These women also, most of them committed self-harm, attempted suicide, and this was all before our relationship together, some of it during, you know. And I tried really hard to be the cure. You know, in that song, Olivia Rodrigo talks about, I thought I found the antidote, the cure. I thought you were gonna, take the poisons out of my body and all this stuff. She talks about unraveling. And I really related to that, not as someone who was hoping that love was the cure, but as someone who hoped they could be the cure. I really hoped I could be the cure to a lot of the relationships I was in. I hoped that my love would be enough for my partner to love themselves, to overcome their anxiety, their depression, their suicidal ideation, stuff that was there before I got there, stuff that was very strong And I realized that to a degree you can be the cure, not a full reliefment, but more of a temporary relief or a milder cure. Because you can bring them many happy moments, many joyous occasions, and great reassurance. But it's so deeply rooted that a lot of times you're treating symptoms, not the root cause. And it strains the relationship. I was involved with relationships where compliments daily per conversation were not enough to reassure my partner about their insecurities or reassurance about other subjects. And I found out the hard way many times in a row that if your partner does not love themselves, you can never love them enough for both your love for them and their own love for them. If they are deeply rooted in an insecurity of thinking that they are, too skinny, too fat, too much acne, bad skin, whatever it is that is their personal vice and insecurity, you can speak against that every single day, and maybe together you can become this echo chamber of positivity that overcomes that negativity. But for the most part, a lot of them heard it from parents or bullies during their childhood, and it's deeply ingrained. It's almost a self-limiting belief, and it's something that they believe. Every morning they wake up and they look at themselves and say, "I'm ugly," or, "I'm too angry," or too sad or too anxious, whatever it is, and you can't be the cure. And I thought to myself, "What is the cure then?" And of course, as a preacher, I said, "Well, obviously it's Yeshua. It's the Bible." In combination with that self-love, it's knowing God loves you, but you have to love yourself, too. And I say that because knowing God loves you isn't enough in a sense that I know plenty of people who are like, "I know God loves me, but I don't love me." And so the issue is still there. It's knowing that God loves you and loving you because God loves you, and trusting His reassurance above any insult or insecurity in this world, regardless of whoever told you what. His word speaking louder than that And in Obsessed, in both Obsessed and The Cure, Olivia Rodrigo talks about an obsession. She calls it a game that she plays in her head in The Cure. And in Obsessed, the whole song is about this subject, which is when you are dating someone and you're thinking about how many people they've had sexual relations with before, or even regular relationships. Insecurities stem not only from sexual activity, which is one of the greatest insecure areas for many human beings, but also just everything about their appearance and personality and lifestyle. And I thought about how if more people lived by biblical principles, these root causes of what leads into these obsessions would be gone. And so that's what today's sermon is gonna be about. Now, I w- have a couple notes because I did wanna quote some scripture directly, and I wanna start with a precursor to this conversation. This sermon is not a call out for shaming. This is a revelation of biblical truth for not just preventing these things, for not just the prevention of these mistakes that cause some of the insecurities and issues that I'm gonna be speaking about. This conversation is also meant to be redemption for those who already have sexual regret, who have romantic trauma, who have deep jealousy and insecurity, who have pornographic exposure in history. And I'm, I'm, I'm gonna really call some of y'all out today. Comparison wounds. Not a call out for shaming, but I want you to know comparison wounds are deeply painful for both you and your partner, and they're something that a lot of us are dealing with. In fact, comparison wounds are probably compounded with insecurity, one of the biggest issues today because of social media on top of ex-partners in a relationship. And this goes also with divorce wounds, and we're gonna be talking about anyone who feels sexual shame this is about redemption and new creation, and I wanna quote some scripture directly here to talk about that, to address this, because I don't want people to listen to this sermon and think, "Man, you're shaming me for having been in a relationship," or, "For having had premarital sex," or, "For, dating the way that I did." That's not what this sermon is about. You know, this is about redemption and new creation. There's no point in shaming. There's point in accountability. And accountability and growth are necessary for redemption and new creation. But just shaming and scaring people away from the gospel, from redemption, from new creation, there is no benefit to it, and it makes you an evil person, to be honest. But there is a certain degree to accountability, a certain degree to accountability that is shaming, in the sense that humility and accountability and acknowledgement and responsibility do require calling out. But the tone of that and how we do it is the difference between shaming and all those things. And so I don't want you all to just put me on full blast for this sermon. I'm not here to put anyone on full blast. I myself will be personally sharing about my relationships as I have already, not to detract from the message of the word, but to build some relatability and resonation with y'all, because I have made mistakes and I have experienced some of the stuff that Olivia Rodrigo is so beautifully singing about. John chapter eight, verses 10 through 11, and I'll be reading from the New International Version of the Bible. And this isn't a direct quote, but I just wanna share, this is a passage where Yeshua tells the woman caught in adultery that He does not condemn her. He does not condemn her, and then tells her to leave her life of sin. If Yeshua is not condemning this woman, how much less are we worthy of or have the authority to do so? That does not mean that He didn't expose it, call it out, or acknowledge it, or hold her accountable. That doesn't mean He didn't tell her to... Right? He said to leave that life of sin, so He does emphasize that it is sinful, but He doesn't condemn her. Right? And Yeshua, when they want to stone the one woman, He says, you know, "You all without sin cast the first stone." However, while we cannot condemn others because of our own sin, that does not mean that we cannot hold people responsible for their sin or hold them accountable or expose it, in the sense that sometimes our own personal guilt and shame stops us from doing so. I think about King David is a great example. We don't know why, but King David never properly addressed one of his children raping another one of his children, and this led to the death of Absalom, who got revenge for, I can't remember if it was his sister or half-sister who got raped, but he got revenge for her having been raped by her, I believe it was her half-brother, who said he wanted her, and she even said, "I will give myself to you after marriage if you so desire me that badly, but please do not defile me," and he, he raped her anyway. And Absalom kills him, which I- it's frustrating to me that King David then is mad at Absalom, because I don't wanna get too far from the sermon here, but how are you gonna not hold one of your kids accountable for rape, but you're gonna try to hold accountable your son who got revenge on your other son for raping your daughter? And a lot of people have speculated that the reason King David did not address the rape in his family was because of his own sexual shame because of the guilt in his heart of what he had done with Bathsheba and the killing of her husband. That being said, his whole family fell apart because of that, in, in part his kingdom, even. Do not allow your sexual past, if it is sinful, to deny you the ability to hold accountability and responsibility and expose sexual sin. And even if you were not guilty of sexual sin, you should not be condemning. But all the more so if you are guilty. However, don't let it hold you back from helping other people. In fact, I think that is our greatest responsibility. More than anyone else, we who know the shame and guilt and regret of sexual immorality should be helping prevent it more than any other, and helping with redemption and new creation of those who have also made mistakes. Now, we know from 2 Corinthians 5:17 that anyone in Christ is a new creation. Now, I've talked about redemption and new creation. That goes for any sexual immorality. And I bring up sexual immorality 'cause it's one of the things we're gonna get into today with looking at the songs and the word. 1 John 1:9, we also see that God forgives and purifies those who confess. And from Joel 2:25, we know that God promises restoration back to the years the locusts have eaten, which we can look at that and apply it to our life. Again, this isn't supposed to be a bashing on you for a sexual sin sermon, and that's why I just did this little intro here to address that before we get into the actual bulk of the sermon. The actual bulk starting mainly with the cure, and of course, talking about obsessed as well. Romantic love isn't the ultimate cure. Romance can comfort you, but it cannot save you, right? And that's kind of what I was talking about, symptoms versus deep-rooted causes. A partner can love you, but they cannot heal every wound. They can be there for comfort and for support and listening and to heal to a degree. But only Yeshua is capable of full, deep, eternal healing. A spouse can bless you in your life, but they cannot become your Messiah or your salvation, right? They are not the ultimate redeemer or divine physician that Yeshua is Ironically and fittingly enough, in this new album that I just listened to, we see in it that, in her song, Stupid Song is the short name for it. Stupid Song is a very good song, and one of the lyrics here is, "And if there is a God, he's the bond that's between us two." And it is uncannily fitting that Olivia Rodrigo, you know, had that lyric obviously not knowing that I had this sermon planned, where I was gonna be addressing not making your partner the God in your relationship, you know? In fact, I'll share a joke I heard from Pastor Joseph Prince. He once made a joke that, some people make their partner the God in their relationship. They replace God with their partner, so much so that for dinner they bring them burnt offerings. You know? And so, joking aside though, your relationship and your partner cannot replace God, should not replace God. God should be an active part of your relationship, and your relationship should be in addition to your life and walk with God, and it should be something that benefits your walk with God. So looking at Jeremiah 2:13, this is a great verse of scripture in my opinion, one that we may have heard a lot. I know I've heard it a lot, and it reads, "My people have committed two sins. They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water." I like to compare the broken cistern that can't hold water to us filling in and seeking ultimate fulfillment through not God, but from romance, from sex, from validation, from attention, from being chosen. We're drinking from a broken cistern, and we're trying to fill it up, and it just keeps leaking out because it's not an eternal living water source like God is. God is the, the cistern and spring of living water that we should be choosing, but instead we're trying to do this earthly one that is just romance and sex and validation, attention, being chosen. And I don't want this to come off as a, "Hey, relationships are so bad. Relationships are evil." I don't believe in that culture of anti-relationship. God said it is not good for man to be alone. God said that, you know, a man and a woman shall become husband and wife and start a family. Relationships and covenantal love is talked about throughout the Bible. So this isn't an anti-relationship sermon. It's the boundary setting of relationships and your life with God and where God plays a role in your life. That is the takeaway that I want us to focus on. You know, in Psalm 73:25-26 it says, "Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." Now, this shows how we should be prioritizing God. In Matthew 11:28 it says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Not, "Go to your partner." We can go to our partner when we're weary and burdened, and they can give us comfort and support, and they can help us rest, but they cannot give us a rest and peace that Yeshua gives us. They can give us the rest and peace that this world gives us. Again, go to your partner when you're weary and burdened and get that type of rest, but you should also be going to Yeshua with those real burdens and for that real rest In John 4:13-14, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst." Going back to Jeremiah earlier, same kind of concept. Drinking the water of relationship here on earth, you're gonna be thirsty again. It just cannot ultimately fulfill you in every way that God can And we are called to go to God, as I said, when we are weary and burdened, but also according to Philippians 4:6-7, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus," AKA Yeshua It doesn't say go to your partner, right? It says, "Don't be anxious about anything. Prayer and petition with thanksgiving to God," not venting and dates with your partner. Again, those are good. I'm not saying those are bad, not villainizing those. But those should be in addition to the prayer and petition with thanksgiving that you're presenting your request with to God. It doesn't say don't be anxious because of your partner. It says, "Don't be anxious because of the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, and it'll guard your heart and your mind," which is important. Now, I talked earlier about self-love, about insecurities, self-harm, suicidal ideation, depression. A lot of those stem from lack of self-love. They're not the root cause always in terms of self-love causes depression or causes anxiety or causes suicidal ideation, but it plays a huge and significant role in those things. Almost everyone I've encountered who experiences one or more of those things has an issue with self-love, whether it's one specific part about themselves or a list of reasons that they have, whether it's from some kind of traumatic childhood, just from the lifestyle they're living, or just their own beliefs that they've always had. But the truth is that healthy self-love begins with God's image. It doesn't just start with looking in a mirror and saying, "Okay, I am this, I am this, I am that." It's your identity is with God who made you. Because if your identity is anchored in who God made you to be, then rejection can hurt you, but it doesn't define you. When your identity is who you want it to be in the earth and of yourself, it'll collapse when any of those things leave you. But God will never leave nor forsake us. Our self-love starts with we are a creation of God. He knitted us together in the womb. Before I was born, He knew me, and He knew you. And that's where that real self-love comes from. And that real self-love is anchored not in our actions that we take, because our sin will destroy our self-image, but in the fact that God redeems us and calls us and uses us despite our sin. That is where that healthy self-love, real, deep-rooted self-love begins. And again, I am speaking to you as a person, not as some kind of holy figure. I understand that self-love is hard. I have my own insecurities that I've struggled with. Yes, I know that God is using me in many ways beyond my understanding, regardless of how I feel about myself. That doesn't mean I just wake up and I'm like, "Yes, I am the Lord's creation and I'm beautiful." I wake up and I see the sins I've committed, the sins I will commit, the sins I am committing. I hear the words of many people, but I try to focus in on God's word. And it's much easier to preach and say than to act out and believe, and I understand that. And I don't say that to contradict myself or to weaken the sermon. I say it because it's real. It's, it's the raw truth. But I'm saying it because I'm hoping saying it will plant seeds that God will cultivate and raise in your mind that will lead to that self-love. Maybe not overnight. It could be, but maybe it'll be a journey. But as long as we continue to pursue that healthy self-love through God's word, that is what is so important, especially when we make mistakes and we feel it start to collapse A poisoned mind. And, and this is great because Olivia Rodrigo talks about, you know, the toxins in her blood and the poisons in her mind or vice versa. And there's a lot of different poisons. Poisons from social media, from past relationships, from thinking about our partner's past relationships, you know? But God's word renews the poisoned mind. It does. Psalm 119 verse 9, "How can a young person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word." So how with all the social media, with the comparison wounds, with the divorce wounds, with the sexual shame, with everything in our lives that's corrupting our mind, that's hurting our self-love, our love for God, our love for others, how do we become redeemed and renewed and a new creation? By living according to the word. Written, your word, which is God's word. And we know that the word is very powerful. And we need that as our anchor because the heart is deceitful above all things. We know that from Jeremiah 17:9, is a very amazing quote. "The heart is deceitful above all things." Human emotions, the heart especially, and love is... I would say love and anger are two of the most powerful, and interconnected, but two of the most powerful emotions when it comes to decisions that are made that are harmful or rash or extreme, right? Both good and bad. And that's not to say greed, jealousy, and pride don't factor in as well. But love and anger, two of the most powerful things. Love, people change their whole lives for love. People change everything for love sometimes. People compromise their moral character for love. In fact, I actually was featured in a book where I wrote about the power of love, and you can find that at my website kapoanox.com. I wrote about love. In fact, I quote from the Bible about love. It is a very powerful emotion, both ways, positive and negative. We know the heart is deceitful above all things, and we also know that everything we do flows from it, and we know that from Proverbs 4:23, a very famous quote of scripture, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." That's libecka in Hebrew, which is an even deeper meaning. "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." And we know that unfortunately, people have set up idols in their heart and put a wicked stumbling block before their face. We read that in 14:3 And I've talked before on this podcast and on other shows, idolatry isn't just about a golden calf or a statue. Sometimes the idol is a celebrity, and I talk about that a lot, how we celebritize people and we make them into idols. But I'm gonna go deeper now. I'm, I'm gonna really be preaching here. Sometimes the idol isn't just a celebrity, it's a text message, a call, a voicemail. It's a relationship. Idolatry really isn't just about a religion, and it's not just about where you go and what you do, it's about what's in your heart Sometimes an idol is a relationship status, a body, or it's the memory of someone who already left And I know this is hard for some of y'all to hear because I am guilty of having done this in the past too Especially including the memory of someone who left But this is real scripture right here. Idolatry. Don't let your relationship become an idol And I brought up sex a lot earlier because really when it comes to Obsessed and The Cure, what Olivia Rodrigo addresses, which I, I love that she addresses this because it is a prominent issue in our society and culture. She's talking about playing a game in her mind where any time she dated a guy, she would tally up all the women he had ever slept with, you know? She uses a more vulgar term for it, but talking about having sex with them, and same with in Obsessed. Like, it's not just about sex, it's about, you know, the music video was phenomenal. I will say the music video for Obsessed was her walking through a building with all of his exes there dressed up like pageant queens, and the pageant tag, the banner, had their name. Like, I don't remember them, but it's like His First Time, Sophomore Year, Summer Fling. Like, I mean, that was such a powerful music video And it goes back to sexual immorality, really. Yes, we care about exes in our partner's life because of the dates they went on, the memories they spent, the time and attention they got. But most people, the number one thing they care about is sex. Most people, if you ask them, "Hey, your woman had a boyfriend before," or, "Your boyfriend had a girlfriend before," but they never had sex together or they were never physically bonded, most people would be like, "Oh, who cares? Yeah, so they went on a few dates." When you say, "Hey, they were having sex," it's a different story. Then your mind starts to wonder, "How many times? Were they better at sex than me? Were they having sex every day? Was it multiple times a day? What, what positions? Was it on the couch, the kitchen counter? Was it at their parents' house?" Like, these questions go through our mind. And the more I thought about this, the more I was like, if we followed- Not having premarital sex, the whole song kind of goes away, and the game she plays in her head goes away. Not just Olivia Rodrigo, of course, but for all of us, right? If we actually followed the Bible and waited until we were married and that person was our person, where the man and the wife become one flesh, all of this unhealthy poisoned mind, all these thoughts that are insecurity, that are jealousy, that are greed, that are pride, that is shame, embarrassment, all these thoughts tied to the sexual past of our partner go away if we actually waited until marriage. And then of course, yes, if you get divorced and have sex with someone else in your next marriage, you're gonna have the same issue. But right now, that issue is tenfold, a hundredfold, because of situationships, relationships, dating. The world treats sex as a pleasurable, fun activity rather than a purpose of refun- reproduction function and as covenantal love. The Bible doesn't say no sex. It's not anti-sex. It doesn't say sex isn't pleasurable. The Song of Songs, also known as the Song of Solomon, talks about covenantal love and sex during that. In fact, we'll read about that later on in the sermon But sex isn't recreation. According to scripture, according to our divine creator, sex is a union. The Hebrew phrase behind hold fast or be united is tied to davak, meaning to cling, cleave, or hold closely, right? Not just physically, but on a soul level. Sex isn't casual in the Biblical phrases or words. It's a covenantal joining. And I wanna go back to talking about that as well. We look at Matthew 19:4-6. "Haven't you read," He replied, "that at the beginning, the Creator made them male and female, and said, 'For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate." Yeshua doesn't lower the standard of covenant. He actually intensifies its sacredness. What God has joined together, let no one separate. And that's not to say that there aren't cases of divorce permitted by the Bible or separation because of certain sins, right? But this is emphasizing that union. This isn't just a, "Hey, get into these situationships. Get into all these relationships or give yourself wholly and sexually and your whole soul to a person in a relationship." And again, it's repeated in 1 Corinthians 6:16-20, we see a lot here. "Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her body?" For it is said the two will become one flesh, but whoever is united with the Lord is one with Him in spirit. Flee from sexual immorality. All the sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own. You were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies. And we see that the Greek translation of the sexual immorality is porneia, and it refers broadly to sexual activity outside of God's covenant design. But a man who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body. It's talking about that is a soul bond. That is, you know, a physical bond and a soul bond, and they're saying with a prostitute? This is something reserved for your wife, and you've given it to this random woman for money. And the same can go for women to men. The two will become one flesh all other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually sins against their own body. And that just emphasizes how deeply powerful it is. Out of all the sins, this is the only one that is inside the body, that sins against your own body That's how powerful and sacred this is It's God's will that we should be sanctified, that we should avoid sexual immorality, and that each of us should learn to control our own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like pagans who do not know God. And if you look from that verse of scripture, the Greek word for sanctification is hagiasmos, or maybe it's hagiasmos, right? But either way, it talks about holiness, consecration, and being set apart. Holiness isn't God trying to steal joy or to be controlling despite free will. It's not about the destruction of the intimacy and value of sex, but it's about God protecting what sin would shatter. It's not just the sacredness of unity, but the mental health and relationship issues that are plaguing our society. That's why I'm bringing this up, right? This whole sermon isn't supposed to be like, "Don't have premarital sex." I mean, obviously don't. You know, I have deep regrets from my own life in relationships in how they were affected, right? When you have sex, it doesn't just affect you. It affects that person, but it also affects all your future relationships, their mental health. It can make them obsessed or poisoned, as Olivia Rodrigo points out so beautifully, right? You have all these thoughts in your head now, all this comparison. We talked about comparison wounds earlier. That's why this isn't just about having sex with other people in the real world, but pornography, OnlyFans, social media, right? You start comparing your partner to that, and you're not satisfied. And now we have people who are obsessed with scrolling through the people you follow on social media and comparing themselves to those people. For example, if you're a woman dating a man and you see he follows all these women who maybe are very different physical or sexual build than you, and now that creates comparison wounds. It creates insecurity because this man is lusting after those women. Same for if a man sees a woman is following all these types of men that are not physically or sexually like him, creates comparison wounds and insecurity, and then you can end up becoming obsessed and I think obsessed is a great word because it does plague the mind. For some people, every time they have sex with their partner, they're thinking about other people, either people they had been with or people that their partner had been with it is poisonous and toxic for the mind and the heart and the soul. That's why in Song of Songs, I brought that up earlier, Song of Songs, chapter eight, verse four, it says, "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." Again, not anti-sex. It is saying "do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires," meaning there's a time and a place. Love is powerful. It's not bad, but awakening sexual and romantic attachment prematurely can produce emotional consequences, as we've talked about. Not just holy consequences with your soul and body, but emotional consequences people are not prepared to carry, that they were not designed to carry. God did not design us to carry all these mental wounds of comparison, insecurity, and sexual immorality. These emotional consequences affect people. They make people obsessed. They make people searching for a cure. They make people feel poisoned and sick You know, marriage should be honored, and the marriage bed should be kept pure. That comes straight from Hebrews 13:4. That's a very straightforward command. Look at Proverbs chapter 5 verses 15 through 18. "Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. Should your spring overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares? Let them be yours alone. Never be shared with strangers. May your fountain be blessed and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth." The Bible is protective of sex because God knows it has the power to bond, bless or to wound and haunt when done improperly sex is supposed to be sacred, and I think this is great some verses here from Proverbs 5 it's not about drinking water from other people's cisterns whether that's other people's wives or other women or prostitutes or pornography or social media, and your springs shouldn't overflow into the street, right? Your sex life and your body and soul shouldn't just be available in the public squares of social media or certain rooms or other's marriages, and so I think all of this is really important. Again, I've made mistakes, and I've experienced the emotional consequences both on my end or from the end of partners that I've had. So I think it's really important. And when I heard The Cure, I mean, I was instantly inspired. I was like, "We can be the cure." Olivia Rodrigo is right. She's saying, "I thought I found the cure this time, and I didn't." You can't be the cure is what she's saying. Now, she didn't say God is the cure, right? But that's what I heard from her song, and that's the truth. When we look at love and sex and relationships nowadays, we see obsession, insecurity, pain. I talked about jealousy, comparison wounds, insecurities, all this stuff There is a prevention guide for it. It's called the Bible, and it was given to us for a reason, and its commands were instructed for reasons. We need to follow that. We need to understand that Sexual immorality hurts everyone in our life. It is a sin against ourselves, against God, and against our future partner. And it is a mental health wound, deep for us and for our partners. So Be cautious when you're dating Having the Bible will help you from becoming obsessed. It'll help you from searching for the cure because it is the cure. And it'll make sure that you aren't left with anything that you are still searching for So thank you ladies and gentlemen for listening. Hope you took something away from this, which is Relationships are beautiful and covenantal and God designed, and they are His will for us. But how we behave in them and how we treat them, that is the big determination of whether they honor God or hurt others