Ep. 45 Empowering Women Leaders: Lead with Heart & Brain for Professional & Personal Success

I'll never forget the moment when my former supervisor recognized the leader in me, transforming my path from social work to empowering women everywhere. You're about to hear how that shift is possible not only for me but for every Latina woman with the courage to invest in her growth. Our conversation will take you through the heart of leadership and the resilience of women who rise to inspire, guide, and transform communities.

Let's revisit a powerful journey with Smilie Filomeno Rodriguez, a trailblazing social worker turned life coach who shares the ins and outs of nurturing leadership skills and creating a work-life balance that honors personal well-being. From the trenches of social work to the heights of program director, Smilie's experiences offer invaluable insights into the importance of self-awareness and empathy in fostering effective team dynamics and driving professional success. Get ready for a toolkit of strategies for self-improvement, boundary setting, and the art of heart-centered leadership that prioritizes collaboration over competition.

This episode celebrates growth and empowerment, especially for our Hermanas in the Latina community. Join us as we discuss the potent impact of mentorship, the transformative power of supportive leadership, and the undeniable strength of a united front of women striving for excellence. Whether climbing the corporate ladder, switching careers, or stepping into entrepreneurship, these stories and strategies will inspire you to invest in your potential and become the leader you're meant to be. And always remember the ripple effect of empowering ourselves: a wave of kindness and love that uplifts everyone in its wake.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational purposes only and should not substitute for therapy. We recommend you seek help from a trained professional for your specific situation.

Q&A: What are Your Thoughts on This Episode? Please message us at contact@smilieempowerment.com

Are you a leader dedicated to achieving success or a professional driven to boost your leadership skills, establish effective teams, and improve your personal and professional development? Look no further! Smile Empowerment coaching offers comprehensive and personalized guidance that caters to your needs, whether individual or executive coaching or team-building sessions.

To book a free 30-minute consultation, please contact us at contact@smilieempowerment.com. During this meeting, we'll discuss your goals and create a tailored plan to ensure your success. Together, we can make a difference and embrace a journey towards your ultimate potential!

Follow Coach Smilie on Instagram and join us live on Thursdays. Conversations with Smilie: we have insightful discussions on different topics at 7 pm EST.

Join our weekly Empowerment Conversations with Smilie in Spanish Live on Tuesdays at 7 pm EST.
Únase a nuestras conversaciones semanales de nuevo empoderamiento con Smilie, Martes de Empoderamiento
a las 7 p. m. EST.
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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:05

Hola, boss Chica. Welcome to the Smiley Empowerment Podcast. This is where we celebrate the strength, resilience and determination of Latina women and all women who are constantly on the go, pushing through challenges and achieving their goals. I like to call these women Boss Chica, like me. If you're a busy woman ready to be uplifted, inspired, empowered to take charge of your healing journey and be a Boss Chica, you've come to the right place. We can all agree, life can be hectic and overwhelming, but anything is possible with the right mindset, attitude, tools and support. Let me introduce myself.

Speaker 1: 0:46

My name is Smiley Filomeno Rodriguez and I am a Latina life empowerment coach and a social worker. I started this podcast because I know what feeling alone and overwhelmed with past wounds and challenges feel like. I want to help you with self-discovery, self-love and self-empowerment so you can grow and thrive. Do you sometimes feel alone? Well, you're not alone. You have me, your coach, smiley. In each episode, I'll share personal stories of resilient healing tips, practical advice, strategies for managing your time and priorities for improving your relationship with yourself and others, and insights on cultivating a positive and fulfilling joyful life. So grab your earbuds and tea or coffee, take a deep breath and get ready to be inspired and encouraged. Let's begin this journey together and empower each other to become the best versions of our lives. Let's get started. You got this.

Speaker 2: 2:13

Welcome back me, boss chicas. I am so happy that you're listening. Welcome back my fellow listeners. I love that you're here, that you're tuning in. I hope that you've had a great week and that this Monday and the days ahead are great for you. Are you? Are you my boss, chica?

Speaker 2: 2:27

And women out there doesn't matter if you're a boss in your, in your office, if you are the boss in your home, in your life. Are you feeling, at times, lost? Are you ready to work on your full potential as a leader? It is so important for you to learn how to lead with your heart and your brain for professional and personal success, as well as your spirituality. So if you're a woman looking to achieve professional and personal success, you are in the right place.

Speaker 2: 3:03

This episode is especially for you. We're going to be talking about, as women, how can we embrace our leadership and lead from our heart and our brain so we could become better professionals, better leaders, as well as in our personal life. It's so important because you matter, but what's most important is that when you, as a woman leader, whether you are an executive, you're a director, you're a teacher, you could be a therapist, maybe you're a psychologist, a social worker, a coach, a stay-at-home mom, right, all of these roles that you have. You need to really work on your ability to inspire, to guide others, to support others directly from your own self-awareness and from your own personal growth and experiences. But when you neglect on your wellbeing and you neglect your own professional development, your own personal development, when you neglect on your wellbeing and you neglect your own professional development, your own personal development, when you neglect your own spirituality, right. What happens is that you impact those that you are responsible for, those that depend on you. You impact the people that you're leading, whether it's in your home, in your business, in your work life, in in your home, in your business, in your work life, in your home life, in your circle of friends, right. And that leads to a ripple effect of a lot of negative consequences. Number one your own consequence to yourself, your self-care, if you're feeling burnt out, if you're feeling stuck right, and then that has a ripple effect because, as we feel in the inside, we project outwardly to those that we care about, those that we're responsible to lead, right.

Speaker 2: 4:53

So I wanted to take this episode and time to talk about the importance of not neglecting yourself and in building your leadership, in you embracing your leadership skills, tighten them up, in you really working on your full potential, becoming that leader that you want to be, whether you're already a leader in the place of work, where you're at, or in your own business or in your home, as the leader of your home, right? You might be a stay-at-home mom or a stay-at-home dad, right? So you want to really work on those leadership skills. Now I have to say that this week, as I said, for me this week was really impactful because I decided to invest on myself. For those that first time that you're listening, for those that are listening for the first time, you probably heard the introduction where I explain who am I and what's the purpose of my podcast, the Smiley Empowerment Podcast, and I am so proud that I'm developing all of these different programs and offers and the podcasts and the resources that are some are for free and others is an investment that you would make on yourself. But just a few months from the time that you're listening to this, I resigned from a great job that I had. I was a program director at a nonprofit organization that it's an amazing organization, helping so many people in the Sunset Park community in Brooklyn and I was there for 18 years and a half and I was there as the program director. I have my master's in social work and when I first came across this agency and I interviewed with my former boss, she actually saw in me greater potential than I had thought for myself, that I had seen for myself, saw in me greater potential than I had thought for myself, that I had seen for myself. I went in to be a caseworker, do direct service, direct work.

Speaker 2: 6:49

I remember my mom when I graduated from high school. She spoke over my life. So let me tell you it's amazing what God has planned for us, that sometimes we don't realize that there's bigger plans, even further, more from what you dream. And if you're not a person that has faith, or you don't believe in God or you call it a different name, it's okay. Just really listen to my experience and try to see if you can resonate and connect with it. But God works in just mysterious ways.

Speaker 2: 7:18

And when I graduated from high school, my mom, on the day of the graduation, when we came back from graduation, my mom told me you're going to be a director. That's what she said. You're going to be leading and you're going to be a director. And I was like what? Because I was getting ready to go to college. I wanted to study to the university, I wanted to study psychology and human behavior and I wanted to be a therapist, I wanted to be a counselor right, I wanted to do direct practice, direct work. And I was like, no, I don't want to be in administration and I don't want to be responsible for people and building teams and stuff like that. And my mom was like, no, but you are, that's what you're going to do.

Speaker 2: 7:55

Now, fast forward. When I came across one of the first social service jobs that I landed not this one that I resigned from a few months ago, but another one that director there spoke over my life too, and that was earlier on, when I was already actually I already had finished my college schooling and I was contemplating of doing my master's in social work, but I still was not sure. And that director at the time told me Smiley, I see you being me in the future becoming a director. And now my mom told me that when I graduated high school, now I finished college and now I landed this job. And now this director, who hasn't spoken to my mom, told me the same thing. Now, why do I say this to you? Because in my experience, I did not know the potential that I had within me and you might be in the same boat. So fast forward.

Speaker 2: 8:51

18 and a half years ago, when I went to interview, I went for what? The casework, precision, right, because that's what I was aligned for, that I felt, that's what I studied, that's where I had also past experience in and I came on board with that in the interview. In the middle of the interview, my former boss says to me you know something? I'm seeing your resume, I'm seeing your experience and what you're talking about here and I see greater potential. And there's another opening and it's for a program director of a small program that I have, that we have here, and that my vision is for that program to expand and grow. And I'm looking for not only a program director, but that's only going to be working on administrative, but I also want a social worker with a social worker background. And also your background is perfect, smiley, because my expertise before coming in was crisis intervention. My focus was crisis management.

Speaker 2: 9:50

My first job in social services was at the age of 18, and I worked at Covenant House Nine Line. They have 24-hour hotline and it still exists and helps runaways reconnect with their families. And also sometimes we had folks that called in with suicide ideations and things like that Crisis right. It was very crisis-based and it was a 24-hour hotline and I was the crisis intervention counselor that was on call and I had a shift. I worked that night and I went to college during the day. Now that was my first off the bat, my first job in the social service field, and after that then I worked at GMHC and that was with working with families and individuals who had HIV and AIDS and doing case management with them.

Speaker 2: 10:38

I've always worked in crisis-based organizations and programming. Also. Then I worked as a mental health counselor once again, crisis-based, right. So my former boss was like you have all this experience on crisis management. I see the leadership here. I can see you becoming our program director for this program. That's very small but I envision it to.

Speaker 2: 11:05

I want it to grow, but I want someone who has also the mental health, the mental health experience, to guide and help, because there's a lot of crisis that comes into the to this program and the staffing there doesn't. They don't have the capacity right, the mental health background and all of that. While they can do fill out the applications and work with the clients, we need someone that can do both. And I was like, wow, that's a lot. I've never been a program director in my life and I was very blunt about it and I said I don't know. Right, you're seeing this in me, but I didn't know. That's the beauty of someone seeing in you your potential and actually offering you the opportunity to go for it.

Speaker 2: 11:46

And I say this because you may be listening and you may be the one in charge. You may be the executive director in your agency, you may be the boss in your own business, and sometimes you have to give an opportunity to an underdog or someone who is coming in, yes, with a certain amount of experience, but also looking at their heart, looking at their experience and looking at their potential and helping them to get to the next level. And sometimes we may not do that. Oftentimes we want people already with a lot of expertise, and I get it. But she saw something in me and we went for it. So my mom was right when she said this over my life and she had kind of like prophesied it. My other former boss that was like you're going to be me, you're going to be a director, and I was like, no, so be open to learning and growing and going to the next level. That's why I say that and I also want you to know that I have so much experience in this area.

Speaker 2: 12:43

Because, long story short, I did take the position and I was there for 18 years and a half and when I first started the programming that I, the unit that I got was very, very small and I was able to transform it with the team, because it's never an I thing right, but I did do the leadership, I was able to evolve and grow and now that I resigned after 18 years and a half, it was a beautiful transition in the sense that it happened in a moment that I didn't even realize how much I was ready to move on. But it was one of those things that you know what you know and I was like, if not now, when, things that you know what you know, and I was like, if not now, when? And I resigned.

Speaker 2: 13:28

And the beauty of it is that when I closed that chapter after 18 years and a half, I was able to really reap what I sowed with my staff. It was so beautiful for them to share with me. What did I mean to them? What did my leadership, how did it impact To listen to other directors that are my colleagues share with me. How did I impact? What did they admire about me? What did they learn from me? What was the things that really helped me in shaping that program, that unit and actually multiple programs I'm talking about six, eight programs that at a time, from the beginning to at the end of 18 years and a half. I cultivated that with the team and that was my leadership. And having my former, both co-executive directors to also shower me with all of the thoughts not just the thoughts but what they saw in me and for them to witness what other people now, after 18 years because there's many of my staff were with me from the beginning, or actually five years plus From the time that I got into this agency. For 18 years and a half, out of the whole agency, I was one of the departments that had the least turnover and it was consistently like that.

Speaker 2: 14:48

Now you know that if you work in a nonprofit it's not for the money, right? You know that oftentimes we're so limited with the budgets and I hope that changes. And, as leaders, when you're hiring, sometimes it's not that competitive or, as they're with you, you may not give the raises that you would like due to constraints in budgeting. However, I always found ways and that's what I want to now teach others right, whether you are in your own business or you're in a nonprofit, or you're in a leader in your home. The skills that I was able to hone in those 18 years and a half and actually even before that, because those were leadership skills that were already being honed in me that I believe that I didn't even know my full potential.

Speaker 2: 15:31

And then, with those 18 years of experience, leading building team, working with funders private and public, right and government and working with budgets and hiring, and having to go through the process of strategic planning with people that were collaborating with board members, with community leaders, right All of that I did it in such a way with the team that was so successful. So when I left, it was like I left in a place that I left everything in a way that worked perfectly, in the sense of everything was in place and I grew the company right, the department I grew. So I think I over-delivered humbly, I would say, my two former bosses were so pleased with the growth, the funders that kept coming to us. I want Smiley to shadow new people and her and her team. I had that experience over and over.

Speaker 2: 16:28

Something I was doing was right with my team, because it's never an I and I want you in this episode, I want to help you to really work on your full potential to become that leader that you were meant to be. So I want you to listen to the whole episode to the end, and I want you to really pay close attention because I want to help you to lead with your heart and your brain. That's how I led. That's how I developed my leadership skills and other people's leadership skills on my team. My leadership was based on my heart as well as my brain, but, more importantly, I led with my heart. My leadership is rooted on empathy and, as women leaders, whether you're an executive director, a teacher, a stay-at-home mom, a therapist, right A doctor, a psychologist whatever you are in that role, you do have the ability to inspire and guide others and be of influence and offer support, and that comes from you.

Speaker 2: 17:35

I never, ever, while I was in leadership, all those years, even before the 18 years in the other places, right, it didn't matter that I wasn't at the time the boss, the manager. Many of us, when we go into jobs or businesses, we're like, well, that's not my role. I never had that mentality. I always functioned in my role in a way that was always collaborative and always with this mindset of okay, if somebody says that something is wrong, let's problem solve. I was always part of the solution. I always initiated that. Now I could see why my mother and my former bosses saw in me this potential of leading. And now look at me, right, I have my coaching business, the Smiley Empowerment coaching business. I'm now in my own business teaching especially women how to become better at their self-love.

Speaker 2: 18:33

Because I've always said this in leadership, wherever you're at, you bring yourself to the role wherever you're at. So let me give this perfect example If you are a executive director or the president, the CEO, whatever your role is in your own business, in your nonprofit, you bring who you are. So let's say that you are experiencing turmoil, you're getting a divorce, let's just say and you're the leader in your agency, whether nonprofit, like I said, or wherever you're at. And what happens when you don't work on yourself? Right when you don't work on your inner self, no matter how much you are regulating your emotions and you're keeping it professional somewhere, somehow, you're keeping it professional somewhere. Somehow, someday it seeps out. And I know you're human because it happened to me.

Speaker 2: 19:30

Not that I'm divorced, but I'm saying throughout my tenure, in my last job, in those 18 years and a half, I had issues, right, but I also worked on myself right. I took it upon myself to get involved in possibly I had to on myself. No one had to tell me I would say you know what? I think I need therapy. There are different seasons of my life.

Speaker 2: 19:50

Dealing with multiple losses which impacted me, made me I felt and experienced extreme sadness for complex grieving and I had to get into therapy right, because I understood that if I didn't work on myself, on my self-awareness, on my healing, it will affect negatively to everyone I come in contact with, especially those that are closest and who are closest my team, which I love them so much. I miss them. My team right. My staff, the clients, the community that I served in Sunset Park right. My clients, because I also was the type of director rolling up my sleeves many times. I was there also on the ground with my team doing the work. So if I didn't work on myself, not only was I harming myself, not treating myself well, but then it had a ripple effect to my staff. It had a ripple effect could be to my clients, right?

Speaker 2: 20:49

Because your mood shifts and sometimes when you're in this mood shift you may not think straight. Right, your strategic planning may be a little bit affected because you're so overwhelmed and you are not aware that you have to work on yourself. Overwhelmed and you are not aware that you have to work on yourself. So it's so important to understand that when you are going through different things in your life that are not really directly in your job or in your place of business, but it's yourself and you bring who you are, you bring it to every person you're in contact with in every situation. So that's why for me, it was always important to be self-aware in my leadership, to be able to get feedback from my staff and not take it personal but at the same time listen to, understand and that feedback be able to make adjustments, not only to myself and my leadership style, but in supervision with them, in programming, in bringing the information to the funder, their feedback.

Speaker 2: 21:56

Because oftentimes, if you're in the leadership funders, from time to time they come and they meet with your team, but oftentimes it's you at the top leadership, with the top tier of leadership, that has the sit downs more often with the funders, with the donors, with the board members, and I had to bring back the feedback that my staff, right, advocating for my staff, advocating for my clients, right. But if I didn't have a skillset of a, it's not just effective listening, but it's also learning how to listen with empathy, right. That's why, for me, my core value in leadership, whether it was when I was in the nonprofit sector, right, working, whether it was then when I came home with the circle of my friends right, with my own home life, with my relationship with my husband, right, it always has been heart-centered and especially at work, my heart was at the center in the leadership. And that means embracing empathy, that means embracing compassion and becoming an active listener, right, and being able to listen to understand your staff, listen to understand your colleague, listen to understand your client right. Listen to understand your friend, your husband, your partner, your kids right. And create a supportive environment right when you're able to nurture your staff, your team, for them to then be able to be productive, but they're also engaging in well-being the well-being of each individual as well as the team's well-being right. And then, as a whole, stemming it. Because what's even first is our clients right, our customers, your customers, your clients, their satisfaction, the productivity right, but for your clients and your customers, when they come to your establishment or if this is in your home life, when your family and your friends come to your home, that it's an environment that's welcoming, that's nurturing and that's so important. What are those values to you? Then, the strategic vision right, you want to talk about. How do you cultivate that strategic mindset at work in your business?

Speaker 2: 24:24

Leveraging the insights that you're learning, the data, what's changing, what are the trends that are coming up with your clients, your customers right, and then, once again, lending yourself to this empathetic communication, mastering the empathetic communication. That's what I got good at, and I say this with being proud about myself. It's not from a cocky place I tend to through the years to. Really, I always said whenever I would go to a meeting with the funders, with top funders and top donors and board members, and they would give me accolades or tell me, smiley, you're doing so great and they were very impressed with my leadership, with what we were evolving, because I was able to establish such great teamwork and people and hire, because I was fully in control of bringing people on board, the hiring, the training them right. So they were so impressed with that.

Speaker 2: 25:23

But I always would say, listen, this is not just me, I'm here representing my whole team. I am no one without a team in reality, right, and what I mean by that? Not that I am not no one, because I know what I bring to the table, but it takes a team to do the kind of work, especially in the nonprofit, in areas where people have a lot of need right and a lot of necessities and things that us, with our program, the different programs within the agency, that they do such a wonderful job. We really provide this service. But then we also need assistance because it's a lot of work and if you've worked in a nonprofit you know that right.

Speaker 2: 26:15

But as a leader you can make changes within your team to really strengthen your team, to motivate and engage your team. And if you could be at the top tier as the CEO, the president, you could be the co-executive director, you can be the executive directors, you could be the manager, you could be the supervisor, or you could be the coworker, you could be the line staff that you're like. Well, I want to climb that ladder of success, but you know what? I don't know how or what are the skills that I need to develop my leadership. Or if I'm already at the high level, right Then. How do I sustain excellence? Right, how do I keep promoting this wellness across the agency, across the programming, across the business that I'm doing with my clients and customers? Right, how do I become more compassionate? How do we lead? Because, in this world, right, there's an exchange. Right For service, you pay this and you get this service. Whether someone is getting paid at some place, right, there's an exchange.

Speaker 2: 27:24

However, in that process, we need to deliver our services, whether it's in the private sector or in the public sector, with dignity, respect, empathy, and not only for our clients and our customers, but for the team, for the people that are doing it together. I've always shared this belief. Yes, we want to impress our funders. Yes, we want to impress our donors, we want to impress our clients with excellence, but we also have to take care of the people delivering that, and it's yourself included and your team and once again I always talk about this goes into your family life. This goes into your friendships.

Speaker 2: 28:06

What I speak about and what I train and help people with in leadership, especially women, it's not skill sets and strategies that you could only apply if you had a business or if you are an executive or CEO or president of an organization, private or public. No, all of these skills and what I've learned and mastered and mastered and was so good at and I'm still good at building from the ground up but sustaining you can apply that to your personal life. You can apply the strategies that I'm going to be talking about and what I'm going to continue developing offers and trainings and workshops for you and for women in leadership, whether you want to be a leader and you're in training, whether you're already a leader and you want to excel and sustain and right All of these skills and strategies, you can apply it to your personal life. You can apply it to yourself. That's number one. You can apply it and share it with your family and your friends, because think about this when I was these 18 years and a half at the former job which I missed them so much.

Speaker 2: 29:19

A shout out to my team, you're the best Because I feel like they're still my team. That's the beauty of cultivating these relationships with team. Imagine that when they're saying, when your team is speaking of you as a leader in such a way that it impacts you, that you're like you start learning what the impact was over those years and you start learning, because it's not till we lose something right or we're putting an end, that we really look back and be like, wow, let me see what was the value here. And for me to hear that it was just so sentimental I'm still emotional about it, everything that was said but it also made me understand wow, I honed and I have something very special here that can be replicated Not a hundred percent, because you're not me.

Speaker 2: 30:03

Right, we're each unique and we each tweak things differently, but there is a mastery that I was able to master in strategy that now in my coaching business, I can show leaders. I can show colleagues and workers and I can help you team build. I can help the leadership. I can show leaders. I can show colleagues and workers and I can help you team build. I can help the leadership. I can also help you if you're not in business but you want to develop your own skillset right, because what you can do applying these strategies the example I was going to give is that these skillsets that I am teaching and I'm going to be doing workshops on, and I want you to stay tuned and stay plugged in because there's going to be opportunity for you to really invest in your leadership and grow, and what better from someone that did it, I mastered it and I did trial and error. There were a lot of success stories and then there were also moments where I learned the most of things that I was like, wow, this really didn't work out well and I'll be sharing those because I really want to be transparent, but I want to really offer you strategies that you can start using even today by the end of this episode, that you can start implementing till you get to possibly train with me. You can hire me as your coach or as well as group coaching, also going into your teams.

Speaker 2: 31:19

I am so happy to work with already executives and in leadership because I did it, and I did it with top funders and government folks and board members and elite the agency that I worked for for 18 years. It's one of the top elite right and for me to have grown and build from the ground up and I am so proud of where they're at and in those 18 years and a half, what we were able to do and my mom always taught me that getting to success and achieving success is hard in itself right, a lot of hard work. But you know, what's even more of a challenge to do, when you have to be very persistent, is maintaining that excellence, and for 18 years and a half I maintained it, and not only that, I kept expanding with the team. We got offers from other providers and funders to say, smiley and her team, we want to offer you this opportunity for this new programming in the city and you're one of the five agencies that we selected. Right, that is impressive. That's the hard work. Those are the strategies that I worked on with my team doing the motivation, working on engagement, working on strategic planning.

Speaker 2: 32:35

How do you work with your funders? How do you build and foster those relationships and all of those skills you can apply for yourself? Because how do you foster your friendships right? When I was in the former job and I had 100% full control of who I hired, I had to really look at okay, what's a good fit, and my interviews were never the typical questions. It was always about really getting to know the person at their heart and seeing, yes, there's hard skills that they needed. But, more importantly, I always focused on the soft skills as well. And if it was going to be a good fit, because I was very protective of the existing team, which, at the beginning, started with two people, right, and then I went up to at times, especially when I had other folks also that were seasonal, but there were times that I had 20 to 25 staff working together and then at another time it shrank to 13. But how do you integrate different personalities and how do you have them work together? Right, so you can apply this to your personal life.

Speaker 2: 33:39

Some of you may be saying you know what? My circle of friends? I feel like we're disconnected, I keep making poor choices or things have changed. So the strategies you can also apply it to your circle of friends, right. How are you selecting the people in your life? How are you interacting? How are you showing up for your family? How are you showing up for your staff, for your team, for your business?

Speaker 2: 34:03

And if you don't have a business, do you have something in mind that you want to develop later but you're afraid I can share with you. I just quit my job a few months ago, after 18 years and a half and after working for someone else from the age of 14. So over 30 years of experience working for someone else and now I'm an entrepreneur, working and learning how to develop with a team, how to develop a team, how to work also on individuals, because I love to work with you as an individual as well, because, I keep saying it, you bring to your job. Wherever you go, you bring yourself. And if you have a lot of areas in your life, or if you lack self-awareness as an executive management, as the president of a company, if you lack awareness, self-awareness, there could be areas of your business, of your agency, of your family life where you need to work on yourself, because you're not seeing that you may be displaying certain behaviors that are not productive for your business, for the agency, for the staff, for your family, for your circle of friends. But in order for you to know that, you have to go within, and that's where I teach also how to do that.

Speaker 2: 35:28

As leaders, how do we take charge of our own personal life in conjunction with our professional as well as our spiritual, because that's so important. So I wanted to share with you guys just a few strategies for you to improve, to improve yourself within your leadership, as well as your home life, your personal life. These strategies are going to help you to become a little bit more self-aware and improve yourself. Okay, so one of the strategies that I have that I want to share with you is your self-strengthening right. I want you to embrace some practical, very practical tips that are going to be covering on your mental health and your emotional and your physical right. So I want you to really take time in the strategy for you to improve.

Speaker 2: 36:24

I want you to be very mindful of the time that you dedicate to your time management. So what is the time management that you need for yourself? If you would be working with me, we would work on strategic plan on your personal performance as well as your professional, and there's key questions to assess that that I have developed so you can assess yourself how are you as a leader? You can assess yourself, how are you as an individual in your family life, because it's so important, they all overlap and they all have a ripple effect, right? So I want you to, in your strategy of improvement, I want you to start thinking how do you self care? How do you, you know? Do you exercise? Do you meditate? How do you relieve stress? What do you do with your time management? We all have the same amount of time we all do. We have 24 hours and seven days. Everyone has this right. Whether you are a famous person, whether you are a regular person, whether you work or stay at home, whatever your role is, no matter where you're from, no matter how much money you have in the bank, we all have the same amount of time. The difference is how we, as individuals, we manage our time.

Speaker 2: 37:37

I remember many of my colleagues other directors would say Saini, how do you and your team handle so much? Because I felt like I ran an emergency room, because my department had multiple programs, but everything was based crisis right, anybody could come through the door in any shape or form, in any way, and we, myself and the team we dealt with them right. We worked with them and that took a lot from us and at times we had to pivot in an instant and we had a lot of emergencies, a lot of crisis. So time management for me as the leader, as the program director and the social worker right in my unit, I had to be very effective with my time management, how to prioritize. One of the things that I learned in those 18 years and a half was that I had to work more on my own self-care, meaning taking care of myself, taking those breaks, being very intentional about going out for lunch and not staying at my desk. So there are things that I also, towards the end end, started noticing that I had to work on more, and that helps you to really work on the burnout Most of all, work on preventing burnout.

Speaker 2: 38:46

So I want you to pay attention to your self-care activities. What do you do? Whether, if you're working, you're staying at home, you have your business, you work and have a side business. How are you dedicating time for yourself? I also want you another strategy that I have for you in your self-caring is your boundaries right? Are you good as a leader? Are you good in establishing clear boundaries between your work and your personal life right, and are you good with setting those boundaries to really put them in position yourself to prevent that burnout and to maintain more of the work-life balance as healthy as we can to some degree because it's 100% balance.

Speaker 2: 39:31

It's really not achievable 100% in all areas, like, for instance, when I went back to school to do my master's. Right. I had to balance right. I was married, I had to balance my home life with working. I was working full time as well and going to school full time for the master's. So something had to give, or one or two areas were not at a hundred percent. So what happened? I had a conversation because you could do this in a healthy way with my husband. I was like you know what and my son was very young at the time and I had to say you know what? We were first time parents. I'm going back to school doing my master's. I had to sit with him and say okay, these are the things that I can no longer do, right, and you're going to have to take a lead on this in the home life because I am working the full-time and full-time doing my master's. So you see, I had a sit down, we talked about it and he was very willing and open to also make adjustments. But that had to do with me establishing a perimeter of this is what I could do and this is what I can't, and then listening to him to see if he's able to provide, and then even extending to some support from my mom, right, Getting people involved that are closest to me. That I trust, but I have to be open to talk and ask for the help.

Speaker 2: 40:50

So how are you with your boundaries at work, with your staff, with the meetings with your own boss? Right, because I had my two co-executive bosses, and what's the relationship like? Right? Do you have open dialogue? Do you sometimes have to learn when to say no to projects or projects that are not a good fit? And you know that, and maybe your executives are like, hey, what do you think about this new project Learning when to say yes and when to say no? Right, ultimately, they had the last decision. What do you think about this new project Learning when to say yes and when to say no? Right, ultimately, they had the last decision.

Speaker 2: 41:20

But what I loved about the agency that I used to work for is that they gave me a lead into telling me okay, what is a good fit? This is a new programming out there. Can we do it based on you and your team and the budget, and can we do it? Does it make sense in this part of the agency with your unit to have it. And there were times that I had to say most of the times there was yeses. That's how I grew the programming from one or two to at one point there were like eight programs in those 18 years and a half.

Speaker 2: 41:49

But there were times where I also had to trust myself, learning my team, knowing our capacity, learning what each of my staff, their strengths and their areas of improvement, knowing what type of team at the time I had, because through different seasons, even though I didn't have high turnover, I did have people coming in from volunteers. I mentored SYP right Summer Youth Employment that would come in and that would change a little the dynamic, even temporary, of the team. So learning always how to do all that, that's all of the tactics and strategies that I hope to teach you in upcoming workshops that I will be designing and having for you guys and I hope, if you're interested, please let me know because I have a waiting list for folks that want to be part of these leadership trainings that I have for development and execution of you going to the next level and sustaining your team and also for team members to take pride and take training on how they can become better team line staff right? It's not only because I always used to tell my staff you are a leader within your role and when you operate from that place, you don't wait for everyone else to say, oh, let's problem solve this. Oh, that's not my job, I'm only here to do data. That's not my job. No, it's good. Be mindful that you what is the boundaries that you have and the constraints in your own knowledge and skill and what needs to be done, but speaking up and offering solutions right, taking initiative. So I was always working with my team and volunteers and mentors that would come through on that. So I want you to think about how do you establish those boundaries for yourself?

Speaker 2: 43:38

And another strategy is for you to ask for help, get support right. Are you the type of leader that you don't ask for support? Are you the type of leader that you don't ask for support, even for yourself? You may need therapy. You may need to process some things. Some of us work with communities that it's very detrimental and it can be very traumatic for us, right, that we are witnessing such hardships and sometimes you feel helpless and sometimes you really do need to be in therapy to process some of the elements and the emotions that are coming up for you and the triggers. So you are better off serving the community and your clients or customers, as well as, when you go home, also being able to have a healthier lifestyle with your friends and your family and not have everything impacting everything because you're not really sorting and taking care of yourself. So you may need to hire a coach like myself, get a mentor right and or a therapist to, or all three to really help you to handle the emotions and the challenges and help you to really prioritize your own self-development, and that's what I did through those years. That's why I think that that was also how I was able to master.

Speaker 2: 44:59

So what are you thinking? As I'm sharing all of this? These are some strategies that you can use to strengthen yourself. Right, I want you to be more mentally fit, more mentally strong, so you can engage in activities with your team, with your staff, with your family and friends, for you to be able to regulate more your emotions and for you to be very clear on where you want to head with your team. How do you want to foster that team building? And the team could be your family. When it's you and one other person, that's a team.

Speaker 2: 45:33

So, even if you don't have a business, even if you're not in a place of work right, an establishment, but if you have a family, your circle of friends, that's a team of people. How do you use yourself in that team? How do you communicate? How do you strengthen that team? How do you strengthen that circle of friend? How do you strengthen in your marriage or your partner? How do you strengthen in your staff? How do you strengthen your leadership team? Right, you might be a CEO or president and you have a level of leadership that's under you, right, that you work with. How do you strengthen them?

Speaker 2: 46:07

But it all comes again from your strength base, and I say from your heart and your brain. Those two work together and that's why I want to offer you the opportunity to work with me, or the opportunity for me to work with your team or with you as an individual, and always with an individual as well. Because when I work with the team, I like to work with the leader, also as an individual. And that's confidential, right, the team doesn't have to know what exactly. Right, I'm working with you as the leader, but it's important for you to work on yourself. And if you're an individual that you're just like, hey, I you know I go to my job and I go home, but I really want to work on my leadership skills, that it's going to be applied across your all your, your areas of your life and you want to reinvent yourself. I love it. Keep staying connected with me. Talk to me. We can work out something I'm doing for women. I'm having a group coaching. So if you're interested in the show notes, you have my information. I'm on Instagram, I go live and I talk about all of this. You can DM me and say, hey, I'm interested in becoming part of a group with other women, like-minded women, where these are the things that we're going to be talking about. Right, and I want you to reinvent yourself, boss Chica. You out there, reinvent yourself, embrace yourself, your inner self, your higher self, and work on letting go those limited beliefs and those old stories that you have, that they're very valid, but you can't live in the past. It affects you, right? It sometimes doesn't allow you to explore new opportunities.

Speaker 2: 47:51

I remember that when I was working in my former job, it was amazing how funders it's just. It was amazing how they would say Smiley, we want to send new directors that are in these new programs that you already have mastered with your team and you hone, you guys are an example of how to run this properly, and we would like for people in leadership that are opening up now, at the beginning the programming and that we're funding, we would like for them to model actually to model after you and your team, and we would love for them to spend one or two days shadowing you. You know how many times I got asked to do that and I was like the first time I was like what Us Me? And they were like, yes, and then it happened often that, as new partnerships were forming with the funders, they were like, hey, we want you to go over to Smiley and her team and shadow her for a day or two. And it's amazing how a lot of directors were asking me how do you keep the team coherent? How do you keep the team working together? Because it's different personality, different ages, different cultures working together and there's a lot of stress for the delivery of services that we had right, how do you do that?

Speaker 2: 49:04

So I was able to master it and I was able to teach it right at the moment and I was coaching SYP students and volunteers and also within the agency they gave us opportunity to do planned retreats. So I was part of the leadership for 18 years, planning the agency retreat and facilitating that as well as at times I volunteered right and I coached college students throughout the 18 years. Several years I said hey, yeah, they asked us, would you volunteer to come and speak for the graduates that are seniors going to college and you just take it away and speak. And I was so happy that they always allowed me to kind of put together something my way, like what I wanted to talk about, and also with my team in supervision and this is important because you may do this for your family, not just in your work life. Right, I was able to.

Speaker 2: 49:58

My two former bosses, but especially the one that I had direct to me, was like, finally, you have the green light. This is like maybe second year of me being there out of my 18 years. They were like you have green light. That if you because I said, can I do trainings, which I was already doing coaching Can you see my future? I didn't even know and I was like, hey, can I do trainings beyond the supervision to help my team to get better for team building and she was like yeah, definitely. I said, oh you sure. She was like Smiley, I trust you. You've shown to be able to work with them and hire the right people and I already see that you're doing so. I trust you Go for it and it's amazing when leadership above you right they give you the the openness to do that.

Speaker 2: 50:42

Now I checked in because I always wanted to check right first. So I always say to people don't take it upon yourself. You always want to check with your agency leaders unless this is your own right, your own business to see if it's okay, because you want to always be aligned with the agency, their mission and aligned with their policies and all of that. But I was able to do trainings already early on in my tenure and throughout the 18 years and I remember a time and this is important because you have to pay attention whether it's in your family, in your circle of friends and in your business or in your line of work. You have to pay attention to energy and see how people are, especially your staff or your children that you're responsible for. When you start seeing shift in behavior, right, you could be very busy as the leader, as the mom, as the boss, but you have to pay attention and there was, in the 18 years and a half, there was a couple of times where they were shifting in the dynamic of the team whether it's one or two individuals a little bit of toxicity.

Speaker 2: 51:40

And I picked up very quick and I remember a time that my former boss came to a meeting with my team. It was a regular meeting that she had and after the meeting she came to me and she said, finally, something's off. I don't know if you're aware and I said yes, I am and I'm working on it. And she was like, oh, okay, as long as you're aware, because they seem a little different. What do you mean by that? It's like more reserve, a few people seem like they're not talking to each other and things like that.

Speaker 2: 52:10

The beauty is that I had the opportunity to develop my own coaching with the team in supervision, and that also was very essential to the growth of the team and to sustain and to continue to provide service, quality service to clients right and quality service deliverables to our funders. But people are doing this together, so you have to work with people right and it was amazing that within I think that was when she brought it not brought it to my attention, I knew it, but she became aware of it because she always gave me the lead way. Listen, if it gets out of hand, then you know. Whenever you need my support, you tell me. But you are here to really work and and be able to work it out. That's how you build the rapport and the leadership and your authority here and all of that. So we worked together and I did a beautiful training that I love to offer to you guys, where I did one on intention right and it's just beautiful.

Speaker 2: 53:13

But it was at times it had some rough patches because people had to speak up of what they really felt and that it was some uncomfortable things that came up in a respectful, safe manner and I was able to facilitate. But the beauty of that it was that we turned ourselves back around to our original state of friendly, familiar, respectful, right, but it was a short period of time that there was a shift because there were individuals with misunderstandings right, that they needed more facilitation, and that it went beyond just the work and through the training that I developed to get kind of that information out and find out. Okay, where are the trigger points, what's happening, where there's splitting going on which people didn't even know what splitting meant. And I was educating the team about what that means. And when they started seeing the behavior right, being role modeled or laying it out on the piece of paper, they were able to say, oh, I've been doing that, I didn't even notice that. And when people started saying to one another, you're not approachable, and people saying what Me, I'm approachable. So you see what I'm saying People were under the impression that they were approachable and they weren't. And what that started doing? People were dividing each other by the way they felt they were like you didn't seem approachable. So I went to someone else instead of to you, and now there's a rift, there's a wall there. So the beautiful thing was that we did it together. I designed the training, I worked with them and it worked.

Speaker 2: 54:43

And I remember that one of my staff, my former staff, shared after and he said to me oh my God, smiley, this was so good and it was a two day. It was a two day, about two hours or so, but for two days, right. So like four to five hours broken up in two days and he was like I would pay for this outside. And I didn't even. I didn't even really realize. I was like, oh my God, my own business. At the time I had, you know, in the back of my head, I was so involved with the agency and just doing what I was doing. But that's just to show you that you really can hone in to the skills that you have and learn more about the soft skills and learn how to reinvent yourself right. And if you're feeling stuck in your career or you're feeling stuck at home, there's always ways to find solutions and pathways for you to really create the life that you want. So, lead by example. Right, make sure that you're taking care of your personal growth, so then it can impact your professional growth.

Speaker 2: 55:46

And then your spirituality. I want to ask you you know how's your spirituality? How do you really integrate if you have a spirituality right? How do you integrate those values, the principles such as gratitude? How do you practice gratitude? How do you integrate those values, the principles such as gratitude? How do you practice gratitude? How do you practice compassion and being mindful within your team, your staff, your business, your customers, your clients, your friends, your family group, your husband, your girlfriend. How do you practice fostering this sense of purpose and alignment with your values? How are you integrating that and how are you balancing your self-care in your professional journey as well as your personal, so you can make sure that you can maintain the success and the wellbeing for yourself and for the people that you're supporting and that you're leading, whether that's in your business, whether that's in with board members and funders and stake a lot of stakeholders right, as well as your family and your friends in your peer groups. So it's so important to balance all of that out to some degree not perfect balance, just adjusting, because sometimes one area may have to, you have to give less focus to it's not even distribution, but you try your best to manage each one the best that you can. So I hope that this episode really helped you to really examine and look at how are you balancing yourself, how are you taking care of yourself in your own personal life, in your professional life, in your spiritual life? Right? What do you need to grow more in? If you're heading towards that path of leadership, then how are you getting there? What are the skills that you need? Not just the hard skills, but how do you lead with your heart? Do you lead with your heart?

Speaker 2: 57:41

In closing this episode, I never forget now in recent times a few months when I resigned and they had my farewell party and one of my esteemed coworkers that she's another director of another unit, another program, but so she was part of my 18 years and a half and she was one of the things that she said that moved me. She said a lot of things, but she said, smiley, you always led with your heart. She was saying, and you always had the standard of people to respect you and respect your team, but you never did it from an aggressive place or from. But you never did it from an aggressive place or from. She said you never. You always exuded the respect, asked for the respect back for you and your team, but you never did it from a place of the ego. You did it from your heart. You demand the respect, but from your heart, and you led from your heart. And I can't believe the reason. I say I can't believe. It's not that I can't believe that is me, but I can't believe that she defined it in such a way and she I didn't know that she viewed me in that way. She is right.

Speaker 2: 58:45

I, with my team, you know we led and we respected everyone, but I also advocated for my team to be respected by the clients right as well. We gave the clients respect and we had a safe environment for them. But we also didn't want and the agency never wanted that either for anyone to emotionally abuse us or be verbal or hostile right or create a hostile environment while they were visiting us for services. So it was very important, but I didn't know that other colleagues would see the way I led the team and how I really did demand respect for me, my team, the clients, everyone. So how are you engaging with your staff? What can you do better? And that's so important. In my 18 years and a half till the last day, I always examined how I could be better. I always worked on myself and were there moments where I slipped up in the sense that I'm like, oh, wait a minute, this, I could have handled it better. Yes, and those are the things that when you're training with me, I will be disclosing because it's important to model. Okay, this is what happened.

Speaker 2: 59:56

To keep it real, it's not just 18 years and a half that I build from scratch programming and establish myself very well in the city and with funders and worked in an agency that's very well known and developed and trained my staff and over and over different groupings of teams to work together. And I also ran retreats for the company in conjunction with collaboration with my other partners and leaders, but I was part of the retreat planning and the strategic planning for the agency. All of that. I gained so much experience and I also learned from my leaders right, and learned from mistakes trial and error and learn from mistakes trial and error right. So I want you to start thinking how can you identify what are the areas that you need to strengthen and hopefully the strategies that I gave you here and sharing my learnings can also get you to embrace yourself, to embrace what you need to change, to become more self-aware and, lastly, I would say, invest in yourself. And if you work in an agency, find out. Is there a budget for training? Right. Get into really developing yourself. Joining retreats. If you need personal therapy and you have insurance, go for it right. Get involved, get coaches, get involved with yourself, because when you do that, you impact everyone else, but it first starts with you. So I hope that this episode helped you.

Speaker 2: 1:01:22

I really wanted to give you an opportunity to really begin to reflect on how you can embrace your current role, whether it's a stay-at-home mom, whether you're working two jobs, whether you're the business owner, whether you're the executive, whether you're working two jobs, whether you're the business owner, whether you're the executive, whether you're a board member, whether you are in leadership. I want you to explore your role, your responsibilities and what aspect of your professional life brings you the most connection and fulfillment in your professional life? And the same question what aspects of your personal life brings you the most fulfillment? And I want you to look at what are the areas where you don't feel that you are bringing yourself a hundred percent within the organization, within your leadership style. I want you to look at that. And I also want you to look at your career goals right.

Speaker 2: 1:02:15

Do you want to be in place that you're working for more years? Are you aiming to getting promotions? Right? Are you going for some promotions? Do you want to make a career change? Do you want to move up the ladder? Do you actually want to do your own thing? Completely right, and how do you do that? I really want to help you with that, okay, so stay in touch with me. Let me know if you want to work with me. Let me know if you are interested in the group coaching that I'm going to be launching very soon and giving out more information. But let me know so you can be on the email list and I can give you the information. If you want one-on-one coaching or you want to speak to me about me going and assessing your team, working with your team to help you team build, or working one-on-one with you as a leader, or if you are a line staff and you want to get better, even if you don't want to speak to your boss about it and work with their budget, or if you just want to invest on yourself and you want to get better, to impress your boss and not only impress, but to kind of go up that ladder please reach out to me. It's so important.

Speaker 2: 1:03:24

You can have the best life that you imagine, but it's what are you focusing on? What do you need to work on? Whatever those goals are, you want to buy a new home? You want to climb the ladder of success? You want to change careers? You want to open up your own business? You want to buy a new home. You want to climb the ladder of success. You want to change careers. You want to open up your own business. You want to get a new circle of friends. You want to deepen more your friendships with your friends. You want to date. Maybe you're not dating right now, you're just divorced and you're going back into the world of dating.

Speaker 2: 1:03:52

All of that has to do with strategies and building yourself up, reinventing yourself. So I can offer strategies across because I really have worked on a lot of those same areas. Some areas personally I haven't, but I've worked with families and friends throughout over 30 years, working with families and individuals, really working on problem solving. So, whether I've experienced it myself or I've worked with other individuals, families in the area, anything that has to do with managing your lifestyle, creating and especially building teams and especially building up. Even if you have one more person, that's a, a team and you starting small. But how are you cultivating the team environment? How are you motivating? How are you? How is your team beyond the numbers? What's the culture of your team? So I can help with all of that.

Speaker 2: 1:04:51

I hope this episode really helped you. Save it, share it with others and comment. Let me know. Follow me. I'm on social media. On TikTok, you can follow me at Coach Smiley S-M-I-L-I-E On TikTok. On other platforms YouTube, instagram, facebook you could follow me at Smiley Empowerment S-M-I-L-I-E. I have to say that because many people want to spell my name with a Y. Smiley is my real name, but my mom spelled it I-E at the end, not with a Y, and I hope that you really enjoy your life. We're in spring. This is the beginning of the new, so stay encouraged, build yourself up. If you are already in leadership positions, you're not far removed from really taking a look at yourself to improve.

Speaker 2: 1:05:39

Some of us, when we are bosses, executives and owners, sometimes we don't look at our own area of growth and become self-aware, and that's where, oftentimes, we don't really go to the next level. We don't take the agency to the next level. We don't take our business to the next level. We don't take our home life and our friends and our family to the next level, whatever that level is. Sometimes we become stagnant because we believe oh, I've arrived and that's it. No, as human beings, till our last breath, we are always learning experiences, moments, skills. We are learning creatures right. So we need to evolve and there's a lot of changes going around in the world, but we have to really hone in on our own strength to be able to then be successful and get involved with other women, other people.

Speaker 2: 1:06:33

In the years that I worked in the social service sector, I networked a lot. I collaborated with a lot of stakeholders. I collaborated with a lot of other teams across that. We did the same work, but it wasn't about a competition, it was about helping one another. So we have to apply that in every area of our life. Yes, healthy competition could be cool, could be nice, but really shift your mindset to sharing, to cultivating, to making a bigger impact when we work together, especially as women, especially as Latina women. So I hope that this was helpful. This is your coach Smiley, signing out. Till the next time, take good care of yourself and of each other. Remember kindness is the highest form of love, so be kind to yourself and others. I'll see you in the next one. Besitos.