Society is Wrong! You are Not too Old to go for that Dream.

What if society’s timelines for success and achievement are just myths holding us back? 

This is your sign to go for that big dream, no matter your age or what all you have been through in the past. It is not too late and you are definitely not too old. 

Chapters

• 0:06 Chasing Dreams
• 11:42 Taking Scary Little Steps
• 17:21 Choosing Your Own Timeline

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:06

Hey there and welcome back to Paradise Perspectives. I am so glad that you're here with me today because in today's episode, we are going to talk about something that is super close to my heart and it is something that has been on my mind a lot lately, and that is going after what we want at any age. Are you ready for this? Okay? Hey, if you're new here, by the way, uh, I'm so glad that you could make it welcome. My name is Rizal. I'm also known as the traveling island girl, and this podcast called paradise perspectives is my baby. It is all about sharing real stories and advice to help women over 40 feel empowered, inspired and ready to live their best lives. And of course, we try. We, for fuck's sake, let's start again. Hey there, and welcome back to Paradise Perspectives. I am so glad you're here with me today because in today's episode, we are going to talk about something that has been on my heart and on my mind a lot lately and that is going after our dreams at any age. I think that's so important to talk about, right? But if you're new here, hi, welcome. My name is Rizal. I'm also known as the Traveling Island Girl, and this podcast right here is my little baby. It's called Paradise Perspectives and it is all about sharing real stories and advice to help women over 40 feel empowered, inspired and ready to live their best lives. And, of course, I sprinkle a little bit of travel here and there as well, because, after all, life without travel is just meh, am I right? Okay, so today we're talking about why it is never too late to go after your dreams. I don't care how old you are, what all you've been through? We've all been through our set of shit, and I really don't care how much self-doubt you have either. I think that it is super important to know that your dreams are still valid and that you can still make them happen. All right, let me tell you why exactly this topic hits so close to home for me.

Speaker 1: 2:22

So a few years ago and I've shared a little bit of my personal stories in past episodes I shared that I found myself in a place where I didn't know what, which way was up and which way was down. I separated quite unexpectedly from my husband, found myself alone and, whether I was ready or not, the universe was like reboot on your life, bitch, you're going to start all over. So I was standing there without any idea how I was going to start anew. I was 47. Oh, to be 47 again. I was 47 and I had no idea what I was going to do, no idea I was struggling financially Heck, I'm still struggling financially now, let's be honest. But really I wasn't sure what direction my life was heading into. I didn't. I really don't. I didn't. I had no idea.

Speaker 1: 3:18

But one thing I realized during that time is that we always have the power to start again. It is incredible how we can start again at any age. It really doesn't matter how scary it feels. So today I want to help you see that too. You know, so many of us have been told there's this imaginary timeline, right, a timeline for life, like by 30, you should have a career, by 40, you should have a family, by 50, you're supposed to have it all figured out.

Speaker 1: 3:52

And, girl, as a 49-year-old knocking on 50's door because, let me see, it is December at the time of recording this. So I am less than in less than five months, I am turning 50. And that word alone is just I hate that word turning 50. Why are we turning 50? It's like you know that salmon is turning. It's like it's going bad. That's what that to me. To me, it means that turning 50. It's like, seriously, you're reaching your expiration date or something, and I hate that. I really hate that.

Speaker 1: 4:34

So I'm not going to say that anymore. I'm not going to say I'm turning 50. I am making 50 because I'm having the privilege to actually make 50 years of age. All right, that's what. I'm having the privilege to actually make 50 years of age. All right, that's what I'm going to. That's how I'm going to say it from now on. But but let me tell you something what I'm, what I want to get to, that was kind of like a side note. Okay, that was kind of like a side note. You know that turning, okay, that was a little bit on a side note.

Speaker 1: 5:09

But let me tell you something Life doesn't work that way. This imaginary timeline that everybody has set for us, or that society has told us how it's supposed to go, makes no sense. Life does not work that way. Honestly, who even made this rule up? Seriously, I want to sit down with this person and have a deep conversation, because this person is super delulule. It's like delusional, seriously.

Speaker 1: 5:38

Anyways, no wonder so many of us go through a little bit of a life crisis at the age of 40, because you get to be 40 and all of a sudden you realize that that whole imaginary timeline has not been going the way you thought it would go. So let's think about this for a second. You know, maybe you are feeling right now like it's too late to go after something you've always wanted. Maybe it is OK, let's do that again. So let's talk about this a little bit deeper. Maybe you aren't right now, where so many women of a certain age are I don't care if you're in your 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s Maybe you are feeling it's too late to go after something you've always wanted. Certain age are I don't care if you're in your forties, fifties, sixties, seventies maybe you are feeling it's too late to go after something you've always wanted, like perhaps it's a new career, starting your own business, going back to school, or maybe it's just picking up a hobby that you love. I've been there too. Hell, I was. I was. That's.

Speaker 1: 6:37

One of the things that I promised myself is that I'm going to do scary little things here and there and then. So one thing that I've always wanted to try was pole dancing. So I dragged my 49 year old ass to a pole dancing class and, um, okay, I didn't get quite up that pole, but I tried and I'm happy I did so. I had those thoughts like am I too old for this? Or what if I fail? But let's flip that whole scenario for a second. What if you ask yourself, what if you succeed? What if chasing that dream is the thing that brings you the happiness and fulfillment that you have been looking for? We owe it to ourselves to at least try. So I gave you that example of that pole dancing class. Did I like it? Will I try it again? Probably not, but I am very happy that I tried it. I am very happy that I tried it.

Speaker 1: 7:39

When I think about success now, it's so completely different from what I thought it would look like when I was younger. Success to me back then was having that big house, travel a lot, marrying that doctor or lawyer, having that white picket fence with a couple of cats and dogs, because I am one of those women that knew from very, very early that I never wanted kids. And you know I would have that really fancy career as well. I would be super successful marketing manager. I saw all of that, manager. I saw all of that. But now success to me, seriously, is waking up excited about my day. Success to me is feeling proud of the work that I do. It is knowing that I am creating a life that feels right for me.

Speaker 1: 8:38

So let me ask you this, and I want you to think really hard before you answer this what does success mean to you? Take a minute to think about this, because it's a serious question. Maybe it's having more freedom, making time for your passions, or building something that's completely yours, something new. Maybe it is starting again or starting over. Whatever that success looks like in your head, I want you to know that it's okay if it looks different from someone else's version of success. My version of success now might not be your version of success, but it is your version and that is okay, all right. So now that we have busted that too late myth, you know that I'm too old myth, it is too late for me, and we've also talked about what version or what success really can look like. It's time that. Okay, let's do that again. So now that we have totally busted that it's too late for me, I'm too old myth, because that's what it is. It's totally a myth, and we've also talked about what success can really look like.

Speaker 1: 9:56

Let's get into the how, because that's important too right. How do you actually start going after your dreams when you feel like the odds are against you, like father time is creeping up behind you like a dirty little pervert and he's in your ass just reminding you constantly that you're getting older, and I'm here to tell you that you need to just kick him in the balls and tell him to sit back, because you know this is my time. Okay, first we need to figure out what lights you up. What is that one thing you've always wanted to do, but you kept putting it off, for whatever reason. I want you to write it down and say it out loud, acknowledge it, accept it, tell it to someone that you trust, share it, because it's important to acknowledge that that dream lives inside of you and that it is something that is the one thing that will light you up and the one thing that you've always wanted. I don't care why you've always been putting it off. We women do this all the time. Oh, I'll wait until the kids are in college, or I'll wait until you know my husband gets that promotion, or I'll wait for this, or I'll wait for that. What is the one thing that lights you up? Write it down, say it out loud, share it with someone you trust. It is something that could be as simple as starting a side hustle. Maybe you want to take pole dancing classes. I don't know. Maybe you want to write that book that you've had in your head for years. Think about it, and then I want you to take baby steps.

Speaker 1: 11:42

I always talk about taking scary little steps. That's what we're going to do after. Because, let me tell you something, big dreams can feel very overwhelming, but you do not have to do it all at once. Just imagine, if you know, that big dream of yours is like you standing at the base of Mount Everett and you're looking up and it seems like impossible to climb it all. And, of course, if you want to climb Mount Everett in one go, it is impossible. So people that actually climb these big mountains, what they do is they climb to a certain level, then they rest, and then they climb some more, and then they climb some more until they reach the top, and that's what you're going to do as well. You are going to take that big dream. Let's, for instance, say that your big dream right now is to write that book. The next scary little step that you're going to take is you're going to write a hundred words every day, a hundred words every day until you have that book completed. And then you take the next little scary step and that could be maybe taking a book to a publishing company or you look into ways that you can self-publish it.

Speaker 1: 12:56

You take little scary baby steps at a time, little scary baby steps at a time, and fear will always come up. You'll always come up with limiting beliefs that you know it's not worth it and why you're doing this now. And do not be that naysayer in your life. Do not tell yourself that you cannot do something.

Speaker 1: 13:20

I want to talk to you also about fear, and I've said this also before in other episodes. Fear is there to keep us safe, but fear, unlike humans, has not really developed as much as we have. Fear is still thinking that it is that we're back in the caveman days, where a cyber tooth tiger was roaming outside of the cave and we couldn't come out and fear was there to keep us safe and alive. But nowadays we don't have that cyber tooth tiger or the dinosaurs roaming around anymore. So fear's job really, fear is just now, so fear is not really about keeping us alive anymore. Fear now means that you're stepping outside of your comfort zone, that's all. So it will always come up when you're doing something for the first time. Fear is just a sign that you're stepping outside of your comfort zone, and that's a good thing.

Speaker 1: 14:25

So instead of letting it stop you, I want you to ask yourself this what is the worst that could happen, seriously? What is the worst that can happen so you write that book? What's the worst that can happen? All right, people don't like it, so they don't buy it. And so what Is that going to mean? That you're not going to be worth living anymore? Is it? Does that mean that, oh my God, this failure is so big. People are going to talk about it forever. Really, what is the worst that can happen? Now? Chances are, when you ask yourself that question, it is not as scary as your mind is making it out to be. So seriously, what are you waiting for? Go after that dream.

Speaker 1: 15:09

And another thing you do not have to do it alone. Find people who inspire you, who lift you up and who believe in you, even when you are not believing in you. Find those people. If you do not have them in your community now join another community. Join a community that will have like-minded women that are also pursuing their dreams, that can be there for you, be your support system, be your cheerleader, all right? So I got to do something shamelessly here. I got to tell you that that is the reason why I started Transform to Thrive Tribe, because I wanted to create a space where women can feel safe. Women like us can get the support from each other as we go after our dreams. That's why I started Transform to Thrive Tribe. So you deserve to have a community like that, you know, a community that gets you and that cheers you on. So if you are feeling like you need that support, you are more than welcome to join us. I'd love to have you with us, all right. So, and even if Transform to Tribe is not your tribe, that's OK too. But find a community of like minded women that can be your cheerleaders and support system. Okay, that is only going to help you excel.

Speaker 1: 16:30

Here's what I want you to take away from this episode it is never too late to go after what you want. You are not too old. Your dreams don't have an expiration date and you don't either. Okay, actually, yes, you do. Let's do that part again. Here's what I want you to take away from this episode it is never too late to go after what you want. Darling, it really isn't, and your dreams don't have an expiration date. You are not too old, so start small. Be really isn't, and your dreams don't have an expiration date. You are not too old, so start small. Be kind to yourself and start at any age, but just start. I say this all the time. Do it scared, but do it anyway.

Speaker 1: 17:15

Thank you so much for spending this time with me today.

Speaker 1: 17:21

Thank you so much for spending this time with me today. Now, if this episode has inspired you, I would love it if you would tell me about it. You can send me a message, or you can email me at thetravelingislandgirlcom, or, sorry, let's do that again. Anyways, thank you so much for spending the time with me today. I am so grateful for you. You have no idea.

Speaker 1: 17:43

So if this episode has inspired you in any way and you feel motivated, I'd love to hear from you. Send me a message, email me at hello at the travelingislandgirlcom, share this episode with a friend who needs to hear it, and also, I would so appreciate it if you could leave a review. It's just a tiny little thing that you can do, because that really helps me keep creating content just like this. And I want you to remember the only timeline that matters is the one that you choose for yourself. Forget about what society has told us, forget about what those near you are telling you, that you will never be able to achieve it. You have got this. I trust you. I believe in you. So until next time, take care and keep dreaming big. My name is Rizal, the Traveling Island Girl saying goodbye, hasta luego, until the next time. I cannot wait to hang out with you again next week. Thank you again for listening. Bye, bye, ciao.