Fresh Air, Friendship & Future Leaders

Welcome back to Season 3 of On the Sofa with British Mums! I’m Emma, and today I’m joined by Cat from the British Mums team for a chat that honestly left me wishing I could go back to school myself. We’re talking to Headmaster Simon Barber and Head of Pastoral Care Sophie Barber from Ludgrove School, and their warmth and energy shine through from the very first moment.

In this episode, we dive into what makes Ludgrove feel so special—from muddy-knees outdoor adventures and proper fresh-air freedom, to “Sunday Fundays,” tight-knit friendships, and a school culture that genuinely feels like a big, caring family. At the heart of it all is kindness: the idea that how the boys treat themselves and each other matters just as much as what they achieve, and that character, empathy, and compassion sit alongside ambition every single day.

We also talk about how Ludgrove balances that deep focus on pastoral care with serious academic rigour—creating an environment where children are stretched, challenged, and supported to aim high, all while feeling truly seen and cared for as individuals. If you’ve ever wondered what a truly nurturing, yet academically ambitious, boarding experience can look like, you’re going to love this one.

So grab a cuppa and settle in for a heartwarming conversation that might just have you wanting to sign up alongside your kids.

https://britishmums.com/dubai/events/

https://www.ludgrove.net/

#you're-a-part-of-this

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:05

Hello and welcome to On the Sophie with British Mumers. My name is Emma, and today I am joined by Kat from the British Mum's Dream Team for a chat that honestly left me wishing, and I can't believe I'm saying this, that I could go back to school myself. We are talking to Headmaster Simon Barber and Head of Pastoral Care Sophie Barber from Ludgrove School, and their warmth and energy shines through from the very first moment. In this episode, we dive into what makes Ludgrove feel so special. From muddy knees, outdoor adventures, and proper fresh air freedom to Sunday fundays, tight-knit friendships, and a school culture that genuinely feels like a big caring family. At the heart of all of this is kindness. The idea how the boys treat themselves and each other matters just as much as what they achieve, and that character, empathy, and compassion sit alongside ambition every single day. We also talk about how Ludgrow balances that need to focus on pastoral care with serious academic rigour, creating an environment where children are stretched, challenged, and supported to aim high, all feeling truly seen and cared for as individuals. If you've ever wondered what a truly nurturing yet academically ambitious boarding experience can look like, you are going to love this one. So grab yourself a copper and settle in for a heartwarming conversation that might have you wanting to sign up alongside your kids. You're listening to On the Sofa with British Mums. Hello and welcome to On the Sofa with British Mums. This is season three, episode 15, and we are week five into probably the strangest time that we've ever seen here in the UAE. So from the British Mums team, firstly, we just want to make sure that everybody listening is okay. We want to send you our love and our light and let you know that we are still a safe space for you guys to come and be part of the community. There are still some lovely competitions going on, some fantastic deals and places, some ways that we can support each other and just feel that we are together in this in this madness. Now, joining me today from the British Mum's Dream Team, I have got Kat Kat, hello, how are you? Hello, I'm so happy to be here. I know, and you've just gotten back from the UK after a wonderful job. So we're just pleased to have you here. It's wonderful.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

I actually I was actually so happy on that plane coming home. It was really, really lovely to come home.

SPEAKER_03 2:22

Felt like felt like you were coming right back to where you belong. That's nice and we like you. Yes, good. I'm really pleased to hear that. That's fantastic. Now, we've obviously also had the rain here uh this week, which has been really interesting. I felt like we were back in the UK, which actually leads me really nicely on to our guests today. Because joining us today from Ludgrove School, which is a fantastic private prep school in the UK. I hope I'm getting all this right. We have got the headmaster and the head of pastoral care, Simon and Sophie. Simon, how are you today? Hello, Sophie. How are you? Thank you so much for joining us.

SPEAKER_00 2:59

Very good morning from us. Uh probably good afternoon to you, but uh, thank you for having us.

SPEAKER_03 3:04

Oh, thank you so much for being here today. What about the weather where you are today? Is it rainy?

SPEAKER_01 3:09

Chilly, but chilly but sunny.

SPEAKER_03 3:11

Chilly and bright. Oh, that's my favourite UK weather. Chilly and bright. We love that. Described the same here, to be honest. Now, obviously, Simon, Sophie, you were supposed to be here in person at the independent school show and to be over here and having this interview with us face to face. And we're really sad that you can't be, but we are really pleased to be able to talk to you anyway because you guys are from a fantastic establishment in the UK, which is providing fantastic education and has a history behind it, which is very impressive. Um, and you said that before the mics went on, we had a little chat, and you said you were always going to be coming out here because you have some fantastic Dubai families, Dubai-based families who have boys at the school, and you you really just felt that there was more opportunity to invite some of those families into your community. Can you tell us a little bit about that? About what made you think, okay, well, we've got these fantastic families, um, and a little bit about your school, if you don't mind. Simon, do you just want to tell us a little bit about Ludgrove School and just a brief sort of history? I know that there's some interesting stuff about you're the headmaster, but I think you've got some family history there as well, don't you?

SPEAKER_00 4:22

We do, but we we we're what we call a traditional 21st century school. Um the boys, we're just we're all boys of 185 of us, uh, and there are two mantras, which is be kind and be the best you can. And we try and nurture the boys' characters, the boys' confidence, and try and encourage them to be as creative as possible. Um, it's not rocket science running a school. If you've got happy families, happy boys, you tend to have a happy school and they aim high and end up doing incredibly well. And I think the reason for us wanting to come out to Dubai and meet you all in person was we currently have two brilliant families from Dubai, with two brilliant boys, one in year eight and one in year six. Uh, and we think we do pretty well around the educational market, but we always want to get better. And we thought perhaps we could get some more, attract more brilliant Dubai families to send their boys here for two to three to four years.

SPEAKER_03 5:17

Something that's lovely about the families here in uh the UAE is that they are always, there's a there's a positive sense of moving forward and a very yes attitude amongst the community over here. Um, and so I'm not surprised to hear that you guys have two lovely families with lovely boys because there are just there are just so many wonderful families out here, and I think actually, even now in times like this, we're we're seeing the the very best of people. Definitely.

SPEAKER_02 5:45

And it's really interesting what you were saying that people would maybe do two or three years there. That's something that's quite surprising. But for me as a parent here, that's a nice way, even though my children are born here, I still want them to have a connection to the UK, and that's a really nice way to get them immersed in the culture. It doesn't necessarily mean it's but a school all the way through, it could just be a two or three year spending time with you. That and that seems what you were saying, some of the parents are doing with you.

SPEAKER_00 6:09

Exactly, and I think that we've got granny-grandpas who live quite close by, or at least maybe London. We're only 45 minutes west of London, so we sit in 125 acres of countryside, uh, are lucky enough to go and roam around uh and just have a lot of fun with our friends. And as I've said at the start, happy boys are much easier to teach. Yes, so we try and create a very happy atmosphere, and we are academically ambitious too, because I believe a school shouldn't just be brilliant pastorally, uh, and Sophie looks after the pastoral side of life, but it's also got to be academically ambitious because it's not cheap sending children to independent educated sort of type of schools, and therefore you can have everything, you can have the best pastoral care and the best academic rigour possible, and hence why I think we've where we are.

SPEAKER_03 6:57

So, so speaking of pastoral, because so far, I'm gonna come to you now. That's a lot of boys in to look after. You must have a lot of energy to control.

SPEAKER_01 7:08

I've got a lot, we've got a lot of very good staff, some fabulous staff who make up the pastoral team, two sets of hoarding house parents, a team of nurses who are here on rotation through the through the day and the week, um, a amazing residential team of matrons who all live in their flats in amongst the boys' dormitories. Um, it's a real team effort, and actually, all the teaching staff also have a role pastorally as well, whether that be as the division masters, which are the tutors, but all teaching staff also are on duty in the evenings one night a week. So everybody here is um is involved pastorally because actually that pastoral care is delivered across the table with a conversation over lunch, chatting up boys to see how their day is going. It's about making sure they're keeping themselves clean and washing properly in the bathroom at night, it's about the quality of the hot chocolate on TV night, it's you know, it crosses all sorts of things. Of course.

SPEAKER_00 8:14

I think we're also lucky enough to have really happy families. Uh, and if you've got a good set of parents, you're gonna have a happy set of boys and then you've got a happy school. So we we do we are a community where it's not just sort of us and parents in terms of it's boys, parents, and school all together in this. Uh, and as I say, if you've got a happy set of parents, you tend to have happy children, and happy children are a lot easier to teach.

SPEAKER_02 8:36

That's so true. And I think a lot of you know, as a parent, that's something I really crave. Like school becomes your life and your big community ecosystem, and that's so lovely to hear that you can create that as well, even when across borders. For some, we've got a team member actually who speaks so fondly of her boarding school experience. She did that, her parents worked away, and she is also looking at it for um one of her children, and I know one of her children's really excited to go. But for someone like me who's never boarded, like, what does it look like outside of school hours? Like, what happens when they're gonna be able to do that? Yeah, what's a day? What does a day look like? How does that look on the holidays for someone who may be not familiar with the boarding system? What do they do?

SPEAKER_00 9:13

The reason why we love our boarding is because it's fun. Uh, and um effectively you have more time to have fun in a boarding school because most schools are pretty similar in terms of the academic side of life with lessons and structure. Uh, and then it's our school, where you actually that's where you build your character, that's where you build your confidence, mucking around, talking rubbish with your friends, having fun running around in the grounds, whether it's playing golf or making a camp or looking after your garden or looking after the chickens or whatever it might be. Uh, it's just genuinely good fun. Uh, and the word empathy and tolerance, or both words, are key in life. Uh, and I think you really understand how other people will operate when you spend more time with them, not just in structured time, but when you're just, as I say, running around outside. Um, and our boys, if it's raining, it's snowing, it's sunny, it's shiny, it's windy, it doesn't matter. The boys will be outside.

SPEAKER_03 10:03

I imagine.

SPEAKER_00 10:04

Uh yeah, and they have a really good time. So, in answer to your question, Kat, is I think if your child likes having fun, you should consider a boarding environment because you have a lot more time to have fun.

SPEAKER_02 10:15

This confirms my suspicion. My parents used to threaten me with boarding school when I was younger, and I used to be like, yes, please, I would like sounded so much thing. I think it was from watching Mallory Towers or reading the books. I was just like, I want to go to boarding school. I wanted to get time to say, thinking it was um going to be a deterrent, and I was like, no, this is where I want to be.

SPEAKER_03 10:33

A sleepover with your friends every night, you know.

SPEAKER_00 10:37

I I think stereotypically, I think stereotypically, if you hark back 10, 20, 30, 40, well, maybe 30, 40, 50 years ago, that's what people think of boarding school, a sort of uh a slightly stereotypical, oh my god, you're being sent away. But actually, you're being said to have a lot of fun. Uh, and it is, as I said, we're traditional, we believe in manners, we believe in high standards. But it we're a 21st century sort of looking outwards and upwards, where knowledge is important but skills are equally important. So it's not.

SPEAKER_03 11:01

That's actually, I was just thinking about, I know you've got quite a lot of high-profile uh students from the past, but but somebody that I me and my husband always watch his programs and really into all of the of the sort of uh survival stuff, and it just made me think about Bear Grills, who I know went to Ludgrove. Just thinking about the the lateral way that he thinks and the fun he has outdoors, and that sort of can do look at the world differently. I'm sure did that started in his school days, if he was outside looking after chickens, doing things, you know.

SPEAKER_00 11:36

I'm not gonna give up any bare secrets, but I think one of the matrices he he bangs hard on his drum the whole time is about being kind. If you uh he's got strong faith, um, but also very quickly after that, it talks about being kind, looking after each other, believing in yourself, aiming high. Just because you can't do it doesn't mean to say you're not good, you can do something else. Everyone's can achieve things, and I think that underpins everything here. Just be the best you can. And you don't have to be the best of the best. If you tried your hardest, that's all you want. And his message resonates with what we try to achieve. You know, as I say, don't try and be perfect, just be as excellent as you can. And everyone's degree of excellence differs from child to child, and every child is amazing.

SPEAKER_02 12:20

Yeah, I think that's a really good default, and there's something it's really lovely to hear you speak about that as educators, because it's something I'm always teaching my children. You know, the default is if you're not sure, and there's so many times in life like we get in the situations where we don't understand there's uncertainty, but just be kind if you've always got that to fall back on. I think it's a it's a great way to steer people and a great kind of guiding force.

SPEAKER_03 12:42

Sophie, what's something that you're really proud of at the school when you are working with the children and when you're with the boys? What's something that you see that they do that you feel really proud of that you think sets them apart from maybe children that don't have that boarding school experience or don't get those sort of experiences?

SPEAKER_01 13:01

I think what gives me enormous pleasure is um seeing the older ones living and having fun alongside the younger ones. I think being quite a small school with just 185 boys, um, to see the older boys, whether it be just playing ping pong or playing football outside on a Sunday afternoon or the weekends we're in, playing games with each other, being supportive of each other, uh looking out for each other. We have um uh as alongside the school monitors who are the prefects, we have a senior boy in each dormitory who is like a big brother to the younger boys, and the little ones really look up to those older boys, and I think the friendships that they all develop because they are living alongside each other so closely, they make the very, very strong friendships and are terribly uh kind and supportive to each other along the way. But definitely what gives me real pleasure is when you see an older boy stop a younger one in the corridor, put his hand on his shoulder and say, Is everything all right? Can I help? Or how did you get on with or just those little interactions, I think, because that demonstrates how comfortable they feel with each other across the school. Because I think that's important. Not I'd I'd far prefer that than the hierarchy of seniors through the school and down to the bottom.

SPEAKER_03 14:30

What about homesick wobbles? Because I know as a mum myself, I would be, I would be worried about the wobbles. Maybe I don't know whether they go home at the weekend or maybe after summer holidays or winter holidays. I know that I would be at home sort of thinking, but then I know because I've I've done quite a lot of education myself, I know oftentimes the mums, the mums worry and then they leave, and then the kids actually turn out to be fine. What do you how do you guys approach those little homesick wobbles? Do they feel like they're part of a family anyway at school? Or do you find that sometimes you have to prop them back up again?

SPEAKER_01 15:06

Very definitely we have to prop them up occasionally, but they they do um, and and you're absolutely right in saying that I think it's much harder for the parents often than it is for the boys. And occasionally you'll hear a boy on the telephone to his parents offloading his worries about the day, and and you know that when he puts the phone down, mum's going to be at home thinking, Oh, I do hope he's alright. And then I see him skipping off down the road, or moments later he's outside having a laugh with his friends, and he's absolutely fine. Um so, yes, the boys do get homesick, but we're all that's you know, that's why we're all here to scoop them up. Simon sometimes likens the boys to being chicks in a nest, and you can sort of throw them up in the air, and if they flutter and can take off and go and do and enjoy and explore everything that's in the school, that's great. But if they fall back into the nest, we're here to help them along the way and point them in the direction of extra pottery or whatever a free time on a weekend. It's so it's about us all being here and the boys being valued as individuals and being confident that we really know what makes them tick. And um, I mean, Simon eats, breathes, and sleeps football and knows pretty much what every boy um supports as his favourite football team, and so it's just about having those little conversations along the way.

SPEAKER_00 16:34

And I think also expect the unexpected, just because a boy's been blissfully happy all the way through, he suddenly might start to hit puberty and start questioning things and worrying stuff about stuff he would never worry before. So, interestingly, quite often the eight, nine-year-olds are absolutely because they're having an absolute blast, you know, they're just mucking around, having a brilliant time, the work is building up, but it's not major. And then as it starts to go into year seven, year eight, they're thinking, Crikey, I'm sitting a scholarship or I'm sitting whatever I might be sitting in.

SPEAKER_03 17:00

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 17:01

And so just expect the unexpected, and and and you if you know the boys incredibly well, you know if they've got a spring in their step, you know if they've got a glint in the eye, and if it's not there, why? And it might be as simple as they've lost their pet, which granny gave them for Christmas, which is a mega deal. Um, but we talk about if you've got to worry, who do you talk to? Uh, and so hopefully you feel the boys are proud of themselves and proud of each other, and we're proud of them, that they can talk to anyone if they have an issue.

SPEAKER_02 17:28

How does the contact look for parents? Like, what contact do they get with the children during the week or the weekends as it forms of letters, you said telephone calls? How does that actually look like from a parent's perspective?

SPEAKER_00 17:40

Um, well, it depends on. I mean, every child is unique, every child is an individual, so there's no sort of format as such. Some children want to call every day, some children go and give two hoots, and you have the mum says, Can you please get Charlie to ring me? Um, so you know, um, so on Wednesdays and Saturdays we have match days, often on Tuesdays and Thursdays we have Gardas. So some parents who live in London will come and pop in and see them then. But we do a weekend in, weekend out. So, as mum and dad, you know, on a weekend in, all your child's friends are going to be around them. And that's when they have the most amount of fun. They, you know, on a Sunday, Sunday fun day, we call it.

SPEAKER_03 18:16

Sunday fun day, I love that.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

Sunday fun day, yeah. And we have a chapel, which is, I think it's fun, but maybe the boys don't particularly actually they do love singing and they do, and we have a visiting preacher from a senior school out, and it's an important part of holistic part of education about thinking of others and and having a calm time in the day. But Sunday Fun Day really kicks off after that. Um, so I I think at the end of the day, about pairing for contact, that there is some parents want to contact a lot, others are a bit more sort of their fine sort of thing. It depends on the family, really. Um, but they can phone every day if they want to. So, about between 15 and 20% of our boys live overseas, some are expats and some are genuine internationals, but they will have a FaceTime or a Zoom on a regular basis, depending on the time frame, which works for the parents. Um, and they quite like those hooks.

SPEAKER_01 19:04

Yeah, it's important for them to be able to have a visual contact with their parents on a reasonably regular basis because they, of course, are not seeing their parents on the match days on Wednesdays and Saturdays in the same way as many of the British families. So it's really nice for them to do that.

SPEAKER_02 19:18

You brought up football. I know this is because it's a question my husband was uh would ask. Um, is there two parts? Do they get access to keep up to date with the football matches? And is there any Aston Villa supporters in your school? This is the sort of question my husband would ask if for considering it for our son.

SPEAKER_00 19:35

We've only got one Villa fan in the school. Um you'll be pleased to hear there are a lot of these guys.

SPEAKER_03 19:41

Oh, okay. That's not good this evening for us.

SPEAKER_00 19:45

Uh just in case this isn't going out on PikTok, that was the Arsenal football club. That was the Arsenal club, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:50

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 19:51

Uh well we have Sky Sports Room, which is absolutely rad. We've just been doing before this meeting, we were having a meeting with our birth about redeveloping parts of the school, and she was questioning whether we need this sort of lecture in Comrame. I said, yes, on a Sunday afternoon with Sky Sports, it is rad.

SPEAKER_03 20:05

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 20:05

Uh we have a newspaper delivered to every class every day, and the first thing they do is go straight to the sports pages. Um, and what's amazing, a boy who perhaps can't do an awful what struggles to retain his whatever it might be, his French vocab or his Latin vocab, he will know every single transfer fee of every single footballer in his football club.

SPEAKER_02 20:24

Oh well, it's important stuff for boys, isn't it? He can meet someone who's a fella fan and they can talk about a match that he wasn't even alive for in the final score. Amazing.

SPEAKER_03 20:35

Well, listen, Simon, I wanna I I want to finish up by by asking you a similar question to to what I asked Sophie uh earlier on about something about the school that makes you feel just incredibly proud. Um, something that when you see the boys doing it or achieving it or as a community, something that you that you you just wear with pride um that you feel that you want us to know in the UAE.

SPEAKER_00 20:59

Our mantra is can you make a difference? And I think I'm proud of every single one of our fellows. Um uh and it's a bit of a sort of slightly a general answer to this one. It it it all we want is our boy, expect the unexpected, as I said. Uh, and it's very easy to teach a really, really intelligent boy to get to scholarship. But it's getting someone who perhaps is slightly short on confidence, and then seeing him after five years or three years, or how many years he's been here, and walking out of here with a spring of step, ready to go to the next stage. Uh that's what makes us really proud in just making a difference uh and making a guy be the best he can be, and to believe in himself, confidence is the absolute bedrock of a happy life.

SPEAKER_03 21:39

Amazing. I love that answer. It's fantastic. Listen, guys, I I know that there's a million reasons that I can't go to your school, but I want to. It sounds fantastic, it sounds amazing. Um, and we're gonna link absolutely everything in the bio below. We're gonna make sure that we get you know all of this information out to everybody. I think that you might find that you get quite a lot of interest um because a lot of people. Are looking at alternative pathways in education. Um, and so it's just been such a pleasure talking to you today. And I just had to speak to two people that feel so impassioned about uh what they do and and the legacy that that has is just a pleasure. So thank you for being here, guys. We really appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 22:16

Well, thank you for having us, and I really hope we can come and join you in person because I'd love to come and see you by next time.

SPEAKER_03 22:22

You're very welcome.

SPEAKER_02 22:22

We'll show you some sites.

SPEAKER_03 22:24

Absolutely brilliant. Well, thank you so much, mamas, for listening. I hope that you uh follow the link below, find out a little bit more. I know that these guys are on Instagram, I know they've got really good social pages that you can have a little peek into what a day in the life looks like. Um, and it really does look fantastic. I really do want to go there. Um, so make sure that you listen, follow along, sign up, go onto the page, check out everything that's happening. You guys are a part of this now. What an absolutely fabulous, fabulous interview today. I mean, we wish that Simon and Sophie could have been with us in person, but honestly, it was just a delight to speak with them. And speaking with people that feel so passionately and proud about the jobs that they do is always just a pleasure of mine. Now, we are sending you guys so much love. We know that this is an unusual time, but please do keep an eye on the page because there are still some competitions, we're sharing some deals, we're supporting small business, and and we're making sure that we we stay together as a community. So uh follow along, tell us what you want to hear about, go on the page, have a little scroll through, look at the laughs, and we just want you to know that we really care about you and that you are a part of this now.