The Truth About “Flew Out” Culture

Cashapp: $askvelvet

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:06

Welcome back to Ask Velvet Podcast. Today we're having a real conversation about this whole flued out culture that social media keeps glamorizing and the dangerous situations that can come with it. We've all seen the stories online. A man offers to fly a woman out to another city or another state. He pays for the flight, the hotel, the food, the nightlife, and everything else. But then the moment the woman refuses to have sex with him, his entire attitude changes. Suddenly she's stranded, kicked out of the hotel, abandoned at the airport, or left trying to figure out how to safely get home on her own. And honestly, this conversation needs to happen because too many people are moving off fantasy and social media hype instead of having real conversations beforehand. Because while some men are flying women out expecting intimacy, some women are accepting these trips without asking the important questions up front. And that lack of communication can create dangerous situations very quickly. One thing I will say is this before any woman agrees to be flown out anywhere, there needs to be a serious and honest conversation up front. No hints, no assumptions, no pretending. Women need to directly ask these men, are you expecting sex or sexual favors if you fly me out? That conversation may feel uncomfortable, but it absolutely needs to happen. Because once everything is laid out honestly, a woman can decide if she even wants to go in the first place. If the answer is yes, and she's uncomfortable with that expectation, then she can decline the trip and avoid putting herself in a vulnerable situation. Communication matters because the truth is a lot of these men know exactly what they're doing. Some of them go on social media and dating apps offering to fly women out because they believe it's cheaper and easier than paying for actual companionship or hiring a prostitute. Instead of being upfront about their intentions, they create this luxury fantasy, expensive dinners, nice hotels, shopping, VIP sections, hoping the woman will feel pressured to have sex once she arrives. And when she says no, some of these men become angry because in their mind they feel like they spent money and didn't get what they wanted in return. That's when the manipulation starts. That's when the threats start. That's when they strand these women in unfamiliar places. But regardless of how much money somebody spent abandoning someone because they refuse sex is dangerous and wrong. What if that woman has no money? What if she doesn't know anybody there? What if something happens to her while trying to get home safely? People don't think about the danger that comes with leaving somebody stranded in a city they're unfamiliar with. Anything could happen after that. And honestly, part of the reason this behavior keeps happening is because many of these men feel like they can get away with it. There are little to no consequences. As long as people think they can fly somebody out, abandon them, and walk away without accountability, this cycle is going to continue. And personally, I do believe there should be some kind of legal consequence for intentionally stranding somebody you brought somewhere, especially if that person is left without transportation, shelter, or a safe way home. Even if it was treated as a misdemeanor offense, it could make people think twice before putting somebody in danger like that. Now at the same time, people also need to protect themselves. Never travel somewhere without backup money, emergency contacts or your own exit plan. Never give another person total control over your safety because consent is still consent no matter who paid for the trip, no matter how expensive the hotel was, no matter how much money somebody spent. A plane ticket does not entitle anybody to somebody's body. At the end of the day, social media has made this whole fluid out lifestyle look glamorous, but people rarely talk about the risk behind it. Before anybody gets on a plane to see somebody, there needs to be honesty, communication, boundaries, and a backup plan. Ask questions up front. Protect yourself and make sure you always have control over your own way home if things go left. And for the people out here using money, trips, and luxury experiences to pressure people into intimacy, that's manipulation, not dating. That is a conversation that needs way more attention because too many people are ending up in unsafe situations trying to chase internet fantasies. Stay safe, trust your instincts, and never put your safety completely in somebody else's hands. Thank y'all for listening, and I'll catch y'all in the next episode.