Up in Flames - Workplace Solutions

Speak Up In Your Community

November 14, 2019 Abby Bolt
Up in Flames - Workplace Solutions
Speak Up In Your Community
Show Notes Transcript
The art of communication is not mastered by just knowing what to say and how to say it. 

A big factor is knowing when to say it.  So often people sit back and say nothing when something really needs to be said. It could be an idea, a suggestion, an observation, a criticism...but for some reason they don't want to speak up.

They may be afraid of hurting another person, looking mean or foolish, or opening a can of worms that will make a mess in everyone's lives.  Sometimes it seems like staying silent is the wiser choice. But here are five reasons why despite the risk, standing up and saying your peace is best.
https://www.inc.com/kevin-daum/5-reasons-you-should-speak-up-even-when-you-think-you-shouldnt.html

Now go use these skills in your community and do a good thing.

Go to AbbyBolt.com for more information on this and many other controversial subjects surrounding moral courage in the workplace and what it means to Lead with F.I.R.E.

Email me at abby@upinflames.org if you have an experience you would like to share or are in need of a resource. If I can't help, I will point you in the direction of someone who can.
 
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speaker 0:   0:00
Hello there. And thank you for taking time out of your busy day toe. Listen, toe up in flames. I'm your host. But more importantly, your advocate Abby bolt up in flames is all about leading with fire. Fearlessness, integrity, resilience and empathy. You can find out more about how I'm doing that by checking out abby bolt dot com. Now let's light up a little moral courage. With today's episode, I am so glad you guys were here with me. I am just going thio talk about what is on my mind in regards to speaking up in your community because this is something that I've been experiencing kind of more so than usual the last several weeks. It, um you know, I've always been out spoken because, let's face it, I'm my mother's daughter and she taught me to be that way. She was a teacher for over 30 years. She was wth e union president for the school. Teachers in cheap did everything like coaching. I mean, she stood up for everything and helped out everyone that she possibly could. So, you know it's her fault if you want to. If you want to blame someone, I may not always do it right. I may not always do it the way that someone else might, but I promise you that it comes from my heart. I was reading something today that, you know, as I looked up, I'm like, Oh, my gosh, Am I just being too out spoken? You know, I don't know. So I looked up something, and I found an article that from inc dot com, that kind of help me realize like, No, Abby, you you do need to speak up. Everyone does. And these are all the things are already in the back of my mind and then to actually see them written, it's like, Okay, cool. We're good. The reasons that you should speak up even when you think that you shouldn't the number one is silenced is deemed approval. And that's what worries me the most. It's like if I know that something doesn't sit well with me, and I don't talk about it, and it happens anyway, and I didn't say something about it. Then it appears that I just proved it. A number two is the greater good should be the priority. So maybe you're not totally comfortable speaking up. Maybe there's a reason, you know, there are some negative ways, but if it's if it's the greater good than you need to be speaking up, um Number three demonstrate that you're invested. It shows that you care. You can't just sit back and be like, Oh, somebody else will do it Or, you know, I'm not gonna go to the trouble, you know, show and demonstrate that you care and that you want to be a part of something takes stake in it. Number four is no one else may know there may be an issue that you're going to talk about or that you want to speak up about. And there may be some people out there that aren't aware of the issue and buy you speaking up that's gonna bring. Bring it to their attention. Number five is you may not be alone in your thinking. So if you're thinking it, chances are you probably aren't the only one. I can almost guarantee that, like, you know, how you'll talk about something in someone like Oh my gosh, yes, I think the same thing or I was totally thinking that, too. I mean, just look at our social media and like it, how comments and everything can thrive on there. So that's a no brainer. So, like the couple of things just recently, you guys know that I speak up in general when needed at a national level of needed, but in my hometown, and I I encourage you guys to lead in your communities as well, for whatever the purpose. Maybe so in my hometown. Recently, our school has had a bullying issue, a behavioral issue more so than anything. I mean, just look at it all across the board is behaviour and discipline. Um, long story short, a lot of people really getting frustrated. And my sister was involved in trying to speak up, and, um, my mom and of course, a lot of other people in the community went to speak of the board meeting. And I didn't know that this was happening that they were gonna be doing. I was volunteering there, the school on my sister told me, and I realized like, Oh, my gosh, that's tonight. I better do something. So I got there the board meeting, sound the back and whipped up a quick little letter slash speech so that I could tell them how I felt about what was going on at the school, what I had been hearing, how violent had become what they were. We're not doing about it. But I got up and I had my voice heard, and so many people stood up that night and spoke. It was super inspiring to see some of the people in the community and at the school step up and talk to the school board and, you know it was crazy is one of the people that's on the school board who just happens to also be an employee at the employer where I left recently, she admitted. She said, I had no idea that stuff was going on. She's on the school board, but she didn't have her finger on the pulse because she doesn't have a child in this school anymore. So if we hadn't have come there and presented our thoughts and opinions, that member of the school board would have known that was happening. So that's a perfect example right there. Some people may not know. Okay, so that's that's an example. So many great things were brought up that night and let me tell you, changes being made. So since then, we've been having several meetings more meeting with the principal and the superintendent on a weekly basis. Like stuff is happening. And it's because we spoke up. Good things are happening. Children are being protected. Okay, that tended. Now, in the last few days, I've kind of ruffled some feathers. Um, hi. Okay, so there is a skate park being put in in our community. I am all for the skate park because I want the skateboarders and kids. You want to do that to have someplace safe to go 1000%. I want them out of the parking lots. 1000%. You know, I can't say enough good things about a skate park. I can also see a lot of bad things about skate parks, and I can go through all those negative things. But that is not what my issue was. Here I am all on board for it. And wearing knew that was going to be well now, fast forward to the last couple of days. I just found out that it is going to be directly behind the backstop of one of our ball fields. behind home plate and take out a whole bunch of green grass where Children play. We don't have very many locations in our little community, so I knew it wouldn't necessarily be the most popular thing to do. But I knew I needed to get it on, you know, in front of some folks to get their attention because I knew there were a lot of people that did not know that this was going to be the location. We all thought it was going to be in a different location. So I spoke up. I wrote about it. I e mailed tthe e planning department about it. It wasn't very popular with the people who are pushing for the skate park who don't care about the softball field or where the kids are playing the little ones. They were frustrated, and I kept telling them, I am not against your park. I am so for your park. I'm just not okay for it right there. I don't want to give something great up to put something else great in. I want to keep both things. I wanna add something, not take something away. So on and on and on And so I kind of started this little rumbling on Facebook and it got people talking and I know it frustrated some, but there are a lot of people that had no idea what the location was gonna be. They did have an opinion, they wanted to talk about it, and it really got a lot of good discussion happening. We got to speak up. We just do. It's so important on a small level, on a big level. And even when you think you shouldn't, there's probably a really good reason why you should. Okay, another example that just popped in my mind of recently. So I'm and I'm not just, like, a constant annoyance. There may be some people in my world that think that I am, but it's about doing the right thing and the greater good. So I'm sitting in the parking lot of the local shopping center with my son. We're saving the car. Were we'd taken my dad to the pharmacy waiting on him, and we're sitting there watching on these. Had some vagrants walking around and, you know, we're looking at I'm watching to see what they're up to, and next thing you no one's checking car door handles. It's like, All right, dude, we know he's up to no good, and I'm thinking, I don't want to be a bother to the sheriff deputy. I know. They're super busy. They only have three of them on a time. I'm not gonna bother him. Not gonna bother. I know there's a lot of other more important things happening. And then another guy walks through and he looked shady. It looks like he's looking at people inside people's cars. Macari casting it. Come on, buddy. I don't want to have to make a big deal about this. Then a guy gets out of a motor home who is wearing police officer looking clothes and a hat, and he takes off and goes walking through the parking lot. And then he comes back with something goes in, his mother comes out again. I think I'm like, All right, that's it. I talked to my son about it. I'm like there is a time where we do want to report suspicious activity. We don't want to burden the authorities, but then there's a time where we need to say something about it. So we called up we spoke up. We called the non emergency dispatch center number and we told them what we saw. And then Boom and officers showed up and she talked to me, my son, and told us how much she appreciated that we took the time to call and that it was for the right reasons. And, you know, it helped her deal with these people so it can be tiny. It can be big. It can be in the grocery store line. It can be, you know, just do it for a good reason for the greater good. Speak up. Even when you think that you shouldn't have the moral courage to do just that, we can't assume that someone else is going to do it. I'm gonna take care of it. It takes a voice, and you guys all have one. You can write about things you can talk about, things you couldn't go to board meetings. You can write to your editors. You can talk on social media, just stick up for the right thing, be there for the greater good. And with that, choose the hard right over easy silence and, as always, lead with fire