Emerson Dameron's Medicated Minutes
LA’s #1 avant-garde personal development program. I'm Emerson Dameron. I love you, personally. Levity saves lives.
The home of Ask a Sadist, Bite-Sized Erotic Thrillers, and the First Church of the Satanic Buddha. Levity saves lives.
Regularly scheduled episodes premiere on the first Wednesday of the month on KCHUNG Los Angeles.
Emerson Dameron's Medicated Minutes
The World Needs You to Get What You Want: Authenticity Is the Ultimate Aphrodisiac
CONGRATULATIONS, YOU'RE COMPLETELY FUCKED
(AND THAT'S WHERE THE MAGIC HAPPENS)
The sun doesn't give a damn if you deserve its warmth. It burns for everyone, even the assholes. And darling, that's your first lesson in unconditional self-love.
Welcome to an episode that's going to strip you of your British politeness and your American self-help addiction in one cosmic strip tease.
Picture this: You're in Shoreditch, where the air tastes like artisanal coffee and broken dreams. Helena the Brit is teaching you how to turn your chaos into currency while sophisticated wankers debate whether the trash pile in the corner is an art installation or just garbage. (Spoiler: It's both, and so are you.)
Get ready for:
- The raw truth about why your relationships taste like microwaved leftovers
- How to stop mistaking compromise for love (and settling for lukewarm when you could be volcanic)
- The art of becoming so authentically yourself that it makes others uncomfortable
- Why your self-pity is the worst foreplay imaginable
WARNING: This episode contains:
- Zero fucks given about your comfort zone
- Dangerous levels of permission to want what you want
- Explicit instructions for turning your mental noise into a symphony of self-actualization
- A master class in recognizing red flags before they become relationship crime scenes
Listen as we explore why your fear of judgment is just bad cosmic foreplay, and how surrendering to life's absurdity might get you laid by the universe itself.
From the bedroom to the boardroom, we're teaching you to wear your confidence like expensive lingerie – invisible to others but making you feel like a god(dess) among mortals.
Stop settling for the kind of love that requires a user manual. Start embracing the kind that burns down your limiting beliefs and dances naked in the ashes.
Available now wherever you get your permission to be completely, unapologetically yourself.
Remember: The chaos isn't trying to break you – it's trying to break you open.
And that's where the good stuff lives.
Trust me. I don't care what you think, and that's exactly why you should listen.
Emerson Dameron's Medicated Minutes is LA's number-one avant-garde personal development program. New episodes premiere on KCHUNG Los Angeles on the first Wednesday of the month.
The writer, producer, host, and witty and wounded romantic hero is Emerson Dameron, who is wholly responsible for its content.
Levity saves lives.
Got something to say to me? Slide into the DMs.
It's OUT! Sophistication Nation: Brief Interviews with Women I Pretend to Understand: https://emersondameron.hearnow.com/sophistication-nation
You know, sometimes I think about the way the sun feels on my skin and it's like maybe that's all I really need, Just warmth, you know, not the kind that comes from people they always want something back, but the kind that just is Like the sun doesn't care if I'm here or not, it just shines, and maybe that's why I keep moving, keep running. I'm not sure if I'm chasing the warmth or trying to escape the shadows. Anyway, what was I saying? Oh right, the beach boys with their motorcycles. God, they always smell like gasoline and freedom.
Speaker 2:I don't love you. I don't need you to love me. I love myself. It's better, I find, to be high on myself and wrong than down on myself and right. It is important to understand one's own weaknesses to the extent that it makes it easier to toughen up and to relax, not take it so seriously. Solve the problem, get that weakness out of your system and love yourself. You know you're the kind of person who can do that To love yourself irrationally, ridiculously, way over the top. Write love letters to yourself, fall of hyperbole, get on your own jock and stay there. Anyone who disrespects you relish the opportunity to throw that person overboard, because you're the captain of the ship and that's because you know what you're doing.
Speaker 2:You look around. You see, most people don't know what they're doing. Most people are so far off from having any idea what they're doing. They assume positions of power that they're not qualified for and what you want to do is step back and see the angles above the angles, like it's a pool table, and strategize. Don't take people at their word. Don't take things at face value. Who benefits? What's the angle here? Why is this person doing this thing? What do they stand to gain? They could just be a loose cannon. Don't assume that they know what they're doing. It's a really excellent chance that they don't.
Speaker 2:There's a difference between malice and incompetence. There's also a point where they bleed into each other, and that's where ruthless ice-cold strategists are so badly needed in this world. Who cares if somebody thinks they need you? You don't have to worry about the rules. They're not enforced. It's a stupid honor system. The rules are for suckers. Most people are so beaten down and so afraid and so defined by their own learned helplessness that they just obey the rules, follow their training, which has made them good servants and slaves and bitches. You don't have to be like that. You can see through it. You can pretend to be like that. That helps you get inside and get what you want. You can do anything you want. This is your life. These other people are supporting characters. This is your story. You're never going to regret loving yourself too much and having too much fun, or doing what you want to do, how you want to do it, with whom you want to do it, when you want to do it and do it to it. That's what the world wants and needs. Who?
Speaker 1:cares.
Speaker 2:It's about what you want and need. If it feels good to be powerful, do that. If it feels good to be smacked around and dominated, do that. You can do it on your own time. You can do it whenever. Do it. Let it be and make it big. This is all you get. The meek inherit nothing. This life right here is all you get. What are you going to do now, bitch?
Speaker 3:K-Chunk, los Angeles, 1630 AM. Kchunkradioorg Emerson Dameron's Medicated Minutes. Medicated-minutescom. Levity saves lives, outro.
Speaker 2:Music. What do you care what other people think? Who are you trying to impress? Why is it anyone other than yourself? You slam on the brakes, do damage to your own car and much more damage to your self-respect to avoid hitting someone. They're walking. You're driving, you got the advantage, use it. There's not enough winning in this life. And yet, even when you're in a perfect position to knock that person over physically and certainly symbolically, does it even occur to you to do it? Do you really think cops are good at solving crimes? Do you think you'd feel bad about yourself? Are you afraid you'd feel really good about yourself?
Speaker 2:It's scary to be better than other people. You might think we want that, but the further along we get on that journey, the more we have to think about. And if we're thinking about stuff because we think other people are thinking about it, really we can't take their word for it, even if they say that something concerns them. Who really knows? Who knows if they even exist? What do you care what other people think? Don't let fear be who you are.
Speaker 2:It's part of your reality. If you're doing anything, that's a risk and a leap of faith. If that's going to work out, and you know it's going to work out, there's a risk and a leap of faith. If that's gonna work out, and you know it's gonna work out, there's no risk and it's not really worth doing because you're not going to get anywhere that you haven't already been. And if you're doing that, if you're taking risks and doing anything that's adding anything to the mix, you will be scared. So know that, feel it and don't let your feelings get in the way of doing what you want to do. Keep in mind much greater abundance of resources and pleasure, which is the point of life. All organisms know this. Plants grow toward the sun and there's pleasure out there for the getting, as well as money, sex, power, world peace. I would think it's just that you don't see options that you don't know that you have.
Speaker 2:And so they're not really options, so you have to discover them. You have to find the questions and love those. We already know the answer is 42. So figure out what the question is for you that gets there. Try to cut down on negativity and complaining, or at least notice when you're doing it. It's worth it because you'll also get insight about people around you that are also bitching to excess. And if you can get it down, you'll be surprised at how good it feels and how much better your life gets and how much more stuff seems to gravitate to you that you love, and you should really check it out.
Speaker 2:What happens if you can get it close to zero? One thing some people do is you put a rubber band around your wrist and just snap it whenever you have a negative thought. Might be worth trying, whatever it takes to just notice how you talk to yourself and I'm the king of the inner drill sergeant with the brutal internal monologue that sends me into rumination, death spirals, and if anyone else talked to me that way, I would get a restraining order. So I really, as a function of my survival, I need to pay attention to that, and it's interesting. You'll be surprised if you pay attention to how you're talking to yourself how things can make sense in a different way if you can zoom out and go meta and rail ketamine until that's easy to do.
Speaker 1:Don't react.
Speaker 2:Make the first move. The first mover has a lot of power. Find somewhere to make the first move. Find something that you're good at, that you love, and win that game. Life is full of games. It's full of war, but it's not all one big world series. You don't have to compete with Barack Obama. You can win at your own table. So figure out where that is.
Speaker 2:When you do when you have something that is worth doing. Put that right in the middle and let your life revolve around that for a while. Be weird, be unbalanced. Really get into that. An hour a day for 90 days would be a minimum and you'll be shocked at how your life starts to express your genius and you forget that you forgot how to be creative and improvisational and MacGyver like a little kid and you learn what you already knew.
Speaker 1:Give it a shot.
Speaker 2:The worst thing that can happen is nothing, or you could go crazy and your life could get worse, and then you could hate me forever. That's fine, totally fair. I can take it. If there's nothing that gets you pumped like that, pick something. Find something that needs to be done. There is so much work that needs to be done. It's not all paid, it's not sexy and glamorous necessarily. There's no excuse for not chipping in. So find something and make that your purpose and then, if it doesn't work, try something else.
Speaker 2:Take care of yourself first. Do that with integrity, authenticity and the full awareness that this right here, this life, is all we get. If we come back, we will not be recognizable to ourselves as ourselves. This is the one ride I get as Emerson Dameron, so I'm going to do right by Emerson first, as a heuristic, sometimes I have to take care of my peoples, but don't put other people first by default because you want them to like you and care about you. It has the opposite effect. If your most important goal in life is to get us to like you, that's the only thing we know about you, because we don't know what your real opinions are or who you are, and you're useless in a combat scenario, because who the hell are you? Whereas if you let us know and we dig it, we're down like that, and if we don't, we were never going to be friends in the long run.
Speaker 2:Anyway, when the truth comes out, which it always does, Don't allow yourself to get stuck in the cul-de-sac of blaming other people for your problems. It could be that you like to suffer. Most people do. It's useful and interesting, just as a thought experiment, to say to yourself what if I am in control of my experience? What if I am the auteur of my life? What if I'm the only person that's ever going to be as invested in this as I am?
Speaker 4:Will.
Speaker 2:I still be mad at somebody for not texting me back in 2018 when I was alone? Maybe so, but you'll be wasting your time. Own 100% of your 50% or 100% of your 0.001%. Look, sometimes it was the other person's fault and you didn't do anything wrong. That's tough Psychologically. It's hard to deal with. When you're done dirty. You kind of have to, otherwise you're going to get stuck. Other people are going to be making your decisions for you and it's going to be the assholes in your life that do that. Remember that culture is not your friend. It can be fun. It's something to talk about If you're stuck talking about Netflix instead of your thoughts and feelings and your ideas about the universe. Sure, it's fine to binge watch Secession. I go back and watch the episodes again because there's so much to unpack. Don't leave it there. Don't worship celebrities. Don't live vicariously through these stories. Culture is not your friend. Create your own roadshow.
Speaker 2:Make your own thing, Tell your own stories. It's incredibly powerful. It's godlike. You don't have to be a professional like me or a genius. The stories don't have to be good. But when you start doing that, especially when you start to get good at it and enjoy it and become a fan of your own stories, you'll never want to go back If you can't find a purpose.
Speaker 2:Find a porpoise If you're not living with purpose. There are a lot of porpoises that need to be taken care of and loved as your own family, and that could be your purpose, even if it turns out to be a bust. You got to hang out with porpoises and have a chill sesh, and that's its own reward, as far as I'm concerned. I'm envious. You're living right, you're balling in my book and my book is correct. Everyone else's book is garbage. Try that. There's no excuse for doing nothing, except when it's time, when it's time to be alone and shut up, resist distractions. Then do nothing. When that's not the case, find a porpoise, Love it till its ego dissolves and it experiences true peace, bliss, freedom and is at one with the universe, and you will be the person who made that happen. You can never really feel bad about yourself after that Not if you're being honest with yourself.
Speaker 2:The world's full of people. Most of them are infinitely, fractally complex. Everyone has a shadow side. Everyone has imperfections that often make them more beautiful and sometimes make them destructive in ways that they don't realize. Those people can be the most dangerous. Some of them you'll really like. Some of them will really like you.
Speaker 2:A frustrating amount of the time they will not be the same people. Sometimes you won't like the people that are good for you. You might really like somebody and really want to be down with them, and when you hang out with them you feel like Alice taking the shrinking mushroom. Maybe they are cool, maybe you love this person. I'm not going to take that away from you, but the world is full of people. We don't have time to know most of them intimately. When you're young, you think you're going to be down with all kinds of people and it really ends up just being a few of them. If somebody makes you feel terrible about yourself, that's not the friend for you, no matter how cool they are. You should not let them get away with making you feel like you're not Nobody's that cool.
Speaker 6:Darling. If there's one thing I detest, it's a combination of vulgarity and ignorance Like imagine actually paying for your vices. That's for hedge fund managers, neglected middle children, tourists in Ibiza. Real sophistication lies in accepting the absurd abundance of life and the mundane miracles it throws your way. Yeah, so it was that.
Speaker 6:I found myself at a gallery opening in Shoreditch. You know the sort Half performance art, half excuse for trust fund muppets to wear things they don't understand. One installation was literally a pile of rubble, with a placard reading entropy Eh, very Proustian, I'm sure. The real piece de resistance, though, wasn't the art. It was Calvin Klein. Not the man darling, nor his knickers, though I do have a few where I keep those sorts of souvenirs.
Speaker 6:No, this was something even more intoxicating. A delightful concoction of cocaine and ketamine whispered about in certain circles. Alternatively, I suppose you could call it Louis CK, although that would be a bit grim for some tastes, including mine. At any rate, when someone sidled up to me with a silver-tipped vial and murmured Calvin Klein, I naturally assumed it was an invitation to a private after-party at the groucho. But no, this was far more exclusive. I leaned in, letting the suggestion hang in the air in all its lushness, then simply said naturally, you see, I'm not some party girl snorting lines off a nightclub toilet. I've been to Berlin, darling. I've read Walter Benjamin. I understand that a truly sublime experience requires the right setting. And this flat was divine, mid-century modern with just a whisper of bohaus. And the host, some ludicrously young financier, had impeccable taste in wine, if not necessarily in companionship.
Speaker 6:Now the Calvin Klein, itself an experience. The initial rush was like an overture by Liszt Sweeping, grandiose, utterly transformative and ever so romantic. My thoughts were electric, crystalline, like I'd been plugged into the cosmos. I turned to the man beside me, an intense, brooding sort with cheekbones that could slice up your soul like a ham, and declared you, my dear, are the raison d'etre of this soiree. He blinked at me, clearly overwhelmed, and then, oh then, the ketamine arrived. Everything slowed to a dreamlike waltz. It felt like stepping into a Magritte painting Surreal, seductive, with a faint air of menace. At one point, I'm certain I held a Socratic debate with a rhododendron. Its arguments were surprisingly compelling. At any rate, I found myself in the host's private library, and I used the terms found myself and library quite loosely. There, amidst the literary detritus, was Stefan Tall wiry, wearing black turtleneck chic. He looked like he'd been plucked straight out of a Goddard film one of the lesser ones, you, he said with this delightfully absurd gravitas.
Speaker 5:You, exquisite indigo child sent from the land beyond good and evil, you, my dear, are precisely as prophesied.
Speaker 6:Now, I don't usually humour that sort of hyperbolic folderol, but I thought why not indulge him? It's what Cleopatra would do, so allowed myself to be adorned in a leather collar. He read poetry, something about constellations and submission. Might have been something he wrote himself. Stefan had the air of someone who's deeply proud of his unpublished manuscripts and convinced the world doesn't deserve them, except for me, of course. And then, darling, it happened. Stefan, with his brooding cheekbones and nouveau vague intensity, transformed this outlandish chamber into a set piece worthy of Bunyan. The room was bathed in violet light, the walls adorned with shimmering tapestries depicting constellations and celestial body. It was all too strange to be tacky, helena. He intoned, as though invoking an ancient spell. The great circle can now be completed.
Speaker 6:With that, he affixed a leash to the leather collar around my neck and gave it a slight pull, which I found both grounding and exhilarating.
Speaker 6:Tonight, you surrender your light to me he said as he tried to tie my wrists together with a silk scarf that smelled faintly of sandalwood and ego. It was also absurdly theatrical that I half expected a Greek chorus to materialise and scold us for our hubris. But let me tell you, darling, for those fleeting moments, I was lost in it, truly, ecstatically lost. The Calvin Klein swirling in my veins, the light spinning like Van Gogh's stars, stefan whispering what I can only describe as metaphysical nonsense about my energy. Fueling the cosmic balance.
Speaker 6:It's a horribly thoughtless thing to mix metaphors around someone with synesthesia who is also on ketamine, which perhaps should have been a red flag At any rate. Ensconced as I was in that moment, I let go completely. I surrendered body and mind to the sheer decadence of it. I was no longer Helena, the icon, the muse, the intellectual, the woman who never pays for her drugs. I was a celestial body orbiting Stefan's gravitational pull, I thought. Finally, someone who gets it, someone who understands how to truly dominate the sun and moon of my ego and bring it all together at last. Oh, I can feel it now, so close, just about to happen. But then, like all great tragedies, it fell apart. Stefan paused mid-ritual hand on my collar eyes, wild and whispered. Do you feel it? Eternity is rejecting us?
Speaker 6:Rejecting us, darling. He said this as though we were physicists conducting a doomed experiment and not having a shag in the back alleys of his neighborhood of make-believe. I blinked, trying to decipher if this was part of his dom-act or an actual psychotic break. Sometimes it's hard to know where the line is. Yeah, not in this case. It was the latter. He collapsed onto the floor clutching his chest, like some melodramatic protagonist in a Chekhov play.
Speaker 5:I can't contain it. The orgone energy it's too much the Orgone energy.
Speaker 6:It's too much. And just like that, stefan, the great new age goth dom of Shoreditch, had an emotional breakdown at my feet, muttering solipsistic nonsense about cosmic imbalance and the futility of human connection. He looked up at me, tears streaming down his face, and whimpered I failed you. I peered down at him utterly dumbfounded. My ecstasy evaporated, replaced by the crushing disappointment of a performance cut short. Stefan, I said suddenly, cool and dry as a martini, if you're going to claim to be a vector for a cosmic prophecy, the least you can do is keep it together for five minutes. He babbled some excuse, disguised as an explanation, but I was already undoing the silk scarf. The collar was harder to figure out, but he readily handed me the other end of the leash. The violet light suddenly felt garish, the constellations on the walls more juvenile than surreal. My only solace was that no one else had witnessed this debacle. I left him there, crumpled in his cosmic celestial despair, and returned to the party like nothing had happened.
Speaker 6:The DJ had switched to station-to-station era Bowie and someone was passing around glasses of champagne so we could toast to something or other. So was it transcendent? Almost? Was it disappointing? Absolutely, but embarrassing? Oh no, darling, I'm never embarrassed. Stefan, on the other hand, is probably still weeping into his velvet drapes expecting some other bright young thing to resemble him. I suppose some people just can't handle the seductive pull of my presence. What a burden it must be to require that much attention. But isn't it marvelous, the things that gravitate to us when we're willing to take the odd interpersonal risk now and again.
Speaker 2:Your mission is pure masculine magnetism. Embrace the virility within Heart, mind and mojo the other dark triad. You're like a badger, a weed whacker and a wizard teamed up. Love yourself violently. Forget. You forgot how to grab your cock when you were born. The doctor died from envy. So experience passion without compromise, through the force of pure masculine magnetism. Knock down buildings with your cock. Be so confident you get what you want just by looking at it or thinking about it. Be in the moment which, like the women in your life, is densely packed. Know what you're doing. Do unto others. Indulge in sensual sovereignty. Practice the art of seduction. Experience in their full splendor true pleasures of manhood. Don't get too serious. Love doesn't matter. Sex doesn't matter. What matters is f***ing a**. Your libido prints its own currency. Your ex-lovers are permanently f***ed. Reclaim your dominion in the bedroom. It should be illegal to swing a f*** like you do without a license. Your home is your palace. Your bedroom is your interrogation chamber. F*** competitively, statewide at least.
Speaker 2:Own your else. Cheat on your property taxes. Elevate your intimacy game. Keep your power. Win the relationship. Win without competing. Play the infinite off game. Play this shit like pinball machines with the force of your pure masculine magnetism. Celebrate your manhood. Be hot, be cool. Yup hurricane. Their whimpers, moans and their your manhood. Be hot, be cool, be a hurricane. Let her whimpers, moans and eggs speak for you. It's the best testimonial. Make her come like Crackatella. Set off metal detectors, erase hard drives with your masculinity. Embrace your true seductive nature. Command the world with your masculinity. Unleash your intimate potential. Embrace the pleasures of manhood. Experience the ultimate union of body and soul. Celebrate the power of your sexual vitality. Forge your path as a fearless man. You embrace a wild side of manhood. Break the chains of social expectations. Dare to be an unconventional man, fueled by raw power, untamed virility, driven by the force of masculine magnetism. I'm a touch-hungry bastard.
Speaker 1:I've always been.
Speaker 2:It's my love language, it's the one I like, because I want to be touched in a friendly way and also in a sexual way. If I have high status, people will touch me, or they'll want to and they'll ask and I'll let them, because I'm a touch-hungry bastard, as I mentioned.
Speaker 4:Absolutely never give up your freedom.
Speaker 4:Ever, for any reason. Security is a lie. Freedom is the only thing that's true. Make sure that you go through life cool, as an unencumbered cucumber, not dealing with anybody that wants to bring you down, not caring what anybody thinks of you, because that's giving control to label you to people who don't know what they're doing. It's scary to have emotions. It's a work of a lifetime to know how to deal with them, to figure out how to accept and feel your emotion. The expression of emotion is that emotion's death knell. However, in order to get through the day, you have to get into practice of not only acknowledging your emotions but managing them, not peeping them out on other folks.
Speaker 4:Being vulnerable in a situation where you're going to have to do that work in real time, under the opposition and judgment of someone else who may be quite childlike. That's what you're committing to when you commit. Maybe you don't want to commit to that, maybe you don't want to settle. You've got a commitment. Really, who's basically settling? You are acknowledging that this is as good as it gets. No point in going any further. Made it to Chicago and it's got to be as good as it gets. There's no place that's going to compete with this. No paradise of pouring sunshine and delicious Mexican food on the other side of those mountains you can see in the distance, because there's no pollution. Let's make some. Let's build a city right here, because let's do as good as it gets, let's settle, let's commit to make the most of this Chicago opportunity.
Speaker 4:You don't know that you're settling. You just think, okay, it's not going to get any better than this. I have to plant my flag in the soil. You'll never know whether it gets better or not. You'll probably settle and keep doubling down on settling and that flag will go deeper in the ground. You might lose all your friends. That's something that doesn't get talked about a whole lot. You're going to be spending time maintaining the relationship, moving up all the expectations that are now laid upon you, raising a child, paying off your mortgage, making sure you keep this person happy in ways that you anticipate and ways that you don't. You aren't always told. You're going to have a lot of responsibility. It's time-consuming, it's energy-consuming, it sucks you dry. You don't really have time to have friends anymore, which is too bad because you need a social network.
Speaker 4:As you get deeper into the commitment, you compromise on the foundations of a good life that you're going to need when things go haywire or south or off the rails or otherwise, to hell, which could easily happen. When you discover that maybe you never were quite as good a match with this individual as you thought that you might be, as the assumptions and the misconceptions and the illusions that helped you fall in love and helped you make this commitment start to dissolve and fall away, you might realize you never really knew this person. They left out a lot of crucial information. They wanted you to like them, they wanted to get you and now they got you. So the mask is going to slip and you might discover things that you love that you never loved before. You might also discover a lot of things you hate that undermine your trust.
Speaker 4:Once that's gone, it really is dead the whole thing, and once the sex gets bad, forget it. You need to get out of there. Most people aren't gonna work with you to improve that situation. They don't even like having sex with you anymore. There's so many signs it's not worth saving and it's no longer a problem because once you're committed, it's easier to just keep recommitting, even if you know that you're missing out on the life, that you really want, the career you could have had. You don't think that really you're not willing to pursue your dangerous dreams because you decided to keep doubling down on this commitment. Instead, the opportunity cost of that is anything else you'd want to do with your life.
Speaker 4:The desire for security always comes from pain, it comes from fear. It comes from being hurt in the past, not wanting to get hurt that way again. So much of life's ridiculousness comes from the fear of death. Fear of repeating the same wounds, the compulsion to fight the last battle. That's why we have to take our shoes off at the airport. One dude decided to do that.
Speaker 4:He didn't even accomplish anything, but we're not going to let the exact same thing happen again. We're not going to get hurt in the same way. We're going to Rube Goldbergify our lives to keep that from happening. We're going to get with somebody else that does the same thing. We don't even know where those behaviors come from at this point. They don't either. It takes years of therapy to get to the bottom of this. It takes years of meditation to get around it. Of course we're not going to do those things because you don't know who we are. And it is better that way, because now we can be automatons, we can be robots, we can be non-playable characters in service to this. What is it, this relationship thing? It's supposedly greater than the sum of its two parts.
Speaker 4:Once the end comes, which it will you'll either deny it and try to stick it out and just let betrayals land up. Double lies will get more complicated, the lies will be on top of lies. Everyone will be exhausted from lying all the time and the deception, betrayal, overt and covert. Or you could just end it lies. Everyone will be exhausted from lying all the time and the deception, betrayal, overt and covert. Or you could just end it, which is painful and expensive. I say this as a veteran of the reservoir dogs of divorces. This is going to screw me up for the rest of my life. My life could be diminished as a result of that experience and I'm telling you just don't. Don't get in a situation where you have to deny that the problem exists, because I won't be the first to say that the divorce is better than the alternative, which would have been sticking out this interval relationship, keeping the BS going.
Speaker 4:Just don't ever get in a relationship to begin with. Don't give your life away to a child you don't even know that you can't trust, that you don't have enough information. Nobody has enough information about anyone else to really trust each other. We'll discover at the end of our lives what real oneness is all about Interdependence, the disillusion of the ego and the porousness of our borders. It'll all make sense. It's not going to until then. When it does, we're not going to be able to get married or procreate or sign contracts enslaving us to banks.
Speaker 4:Don't do those things now. That's what I'm saying. You'll get shut down by your partner. You'll get turned down and insulted. Jack is what's an insult without a nice injury on top of it? They'll cheat on you. Of course they will. Adults have sex, not you because you don't think that you're attractive. If you thought that you were attractive even if you weren't, you'd probably get some. But as it stands, you're going to be at home while your partner is out there having a great time, making memories that they can think back on when everything falls apart, during the breakup or divorce that's coming. They'll also have those people rooting for them.
Speaker 4:You won't have those. Your resentment and bitterness will drive everyone away. You'll never really know exactly the nature of what happened, how it fell apart so badly. You won't be able to realize when abuse is going on.
Speaker 4:As anyone is diagnosable. Almost every relationship is abusive. That's the thing about being a two-person cult, and it's not intentional. Most of the time, people are just awful garbage and they can't communicate. Misunderstandings stack on top of conflicts, on top of lies and half-lies and white lies on top of lies and half-lies and white lies, inaccuracies, opinions substituted for facts, miscommunication, mismatched expectations, including expectations. You were not told about financial conflicts. You're going to find out how good you are with money? Probably not in theory. Then, though, the intimacy will break down. The resentment will go up as the intimacy goes down, as the trust goes down, and now you've got kids involved. Nobody trusts each other. You're in hell that you created on Earth. Get out beforehand. Don't do this. Don't get in a relationship. It's not worth it. Freedom is the only thing that matters. Be free, free yourself Now. Do it. This is the time. Do it now, or you'll forget about it, and then you'll be a slave before you know what's happening.
Speaker 2:That brings us to the topic of sex. Throwing the D is fun for a while, getting them giving to people who are very appreciative because they're in love with me. They'll take it in holes they didn't even know they had. But after a while sex gets old. Anyone who's had a lot of it has experienced this. And sometimes that means getting more perverted, escalating the roughness or the variety, meaning some stuff is not fit for polite conversation. It could also mean getting total devotion. Let's do this exuberant celebration of human creativity Also. You will come to see sucking it as your reward for your full devotion to me, which means running errands, of course, washing my car scantily clad and pretty much anything I want. So it's just pure degradation, because I enjoy that. That helps me love myself and love myself first and best, and that helps the world get what it needs, because the world needs for me to get what I want. I get a lot of sex. It's obscene, it's ridiculous. I'm banging it out in churches, in zoos, with humans, women, not the animals. I don't swing that way, although what I've discovered is when you have as much sex as I do, you're always looking for new ways to ramp up the novelty. That's the life I lead. That's normal for me. It wasn't always. I was much like you. If you're here at I Get Sex and so Can you you're probably not getting as much sex as you want, or you're trying to take it up a notch because it's never quite enough, or you're a well-established player who knows the life is practice of lifelong learning. You're a player who does the work, and I salute you. There was a time when I did not have the sexual access abundance that I enjoy right now. Only through a lot of trial error, hard work, some embarrassment and a lot of really good times did I get to where I am now, and I'm going to show you how to cut out everything except the good times and the sizzling hot, steamy, sloppy, messy sex that you're going to have when you're getting sex, like I do, which is what you can expect from this seminar.
Speaker 2:Getting sex is important if you're a human. If you're a man, you think about sex many times a day. If you're a woman, it's more than that. We want sex, we need it, it's our calling. Everything is sex. Power is sex. All the ships that have sailed across the ocean, all the wars fought and all the great works of art created, it was all about sex. Somebody was horny. It is the force of life itself. Sex is God and you should be proud of wanting sex. You should get all of the sex that you want with the caliber of partners that you want, and it could be different from what I'm into.
Speaker 2:Examine your own beliefs, experiences and your real desires. What are the things that are turn-ons for you that you wouldn't necessarily go around talking about? There's a book called Everybody Lies, a study of anonymized Google results. You know what A lot of men are into overweight women and other women that are not ones that are ordained to be into, and that's all fine and good. If you lead with that, you will get laid more Because you'll know what you want, which will drive you to go get it, and you will do so with fearless confidence, doing whatever the hell you want, staying out of other people's business, expecting them to stay out of yours, and that comes from self-inquiry, from awareness of self, from awareness of others or embodied presence, and that comes through having a lot of sex mindfully, and we'll get into how you can get that stone rolling.
Speaker 2:First, you have to cut through limiting beliefs Beliefs about yourself, about sex, about people that hold you back. What kind of crap did you pick up from your parents, religious organizations, rejections that you faced? It was all wrong. Sex is good, it's fun. It can be sublime, ecstatic, when carried out between people who know what's up and dig each other on the same wavelength there or they're on very different wavelengths and savoring the joys of hate sex, which I thoroughly recommend. At least once or twice You've got to experience that and then you can bring some of that into the rest of your sex life. You can throw down like you're throwing a temper tantrum and do it as though you're filled with hate in your heart and your groin, and they'll probably get into it Because that feels good. Life is rough. We need catharsis. Sometimes we need to take a beating to keep on eating and repeating the routines that we do every day.
Speaker 2:Life can be a drudgery, but it's fun when there's a lot of sex and you cut through all those limiting beliefs. Start with one. Start with you're not sufficiently good looking. That's not true. Everyone is somebody's type. You haven't found the right audience yet. We're going to work on that. We're going to get you a makeover and we're going to get you on the scene where you want to be and belong Lines on a graph intersecting. We're going to find that for you. We're going to help you set goals and a vision, to have a very clear notion of the sex that you want, the partner you want, what you want out of sex and life and all the sex that you're going to be getting, which is going to be a substantial amount.
Speaker 2:You know exactly what you get. It makes it a lot easier to get it. It takes out so much of the guesswork and trial and error and then, when you've got that down, you can go try other things and things you don't even know if you like to see. Maybe that's a fetish that you didn't know about. You could develop positive habits of getting out there and getting in the game, getting excited, getting sexual, leading with your sexuality, a fearless human being who's happy to be here, fully embodied, fully present and ready to get it on at a moment's notice. And that's the mindset of resilience, of self-confidence, taking failure quote-unquote failure as feedback and, most importantly, being horny for yourself desperately so. It's sickening. You can manage your emotions, whether it's the catching of feelings, limerence, romantic tendencies, all of that Getting fixated on one person who might not like you back and doesn't need or deserve that much power. Either way, you can get a handle on those feelings as well as any impediments to full self-confidence that you might experience, like taking rejection as a referendum on you as a person. That person doesn't even know you, not like you know yourself, and you are going to know yourself good and damned well when you make a daily practice of meditation, because that's going to kill your feelings dead or it's going to give you the power to do that. You can dominate your feelings. They will know not to mess with you because you mean business and that means the close of business potentially for them if they get on your bad side. So watch it.
Speaker 2:Feelings Don't get messy all over the place. It's my party and you're not going to cry if I don't want you to Practice self-compassion. Feelings are not wrong. Your feelings are always correct, as are everyone else's. You just have to feel them.
Speaker 2:Keep your own counsel. Know that you know what's up. Get a workout from all the sex that you're getting. Release those feel-good brain chemicals to make all of this a lot easier. To squeeze out the wheels and breeze out the system and be the best lover that you ever had for yourself. Learn how to masturbate. It's a spiritual practice. Learn everything that you want the most. Let yourself have it. Maybe tease yourself a little bit, a little fun cat and mouse action, keep things spicy. But then you're the only one that really knows all that and you're going to keep it for yourself, so the rest of humanity can rot until it's their time.
Speaker 2:Develop positive relationships and always grateful to everyone ready to get down and have sex when the time comes If you're into it and they're into it, why not? Life is for living. The shadows draw long. The night is young, but oh wait, the shadows were long and now the night is young, but the night won't last forever, so start banging it out post haste through those positive relationships you develop, taking action, moving it forward, getting out there, getting assertive, making plans, being the one who plans and invites people into your world, into your life, which is a party, and it doesn't matter if they show up or not. The party rages on either, and you're willing to almost be a pest, to err on the side of too much boldness, which is also the way that you're going to get all this wild, wet, happy sex.
Speaker 2:Err on the side of a little bit too much confidence. It's better to be high on yourself and wrong than down on yourself and right and then move it forward like a bowling ball headed down the alley for a strike towards sex. Always be putting the game in the mix. Let it be known that you have sexual intentions and if a person you're interested in is not reciprocating, don't invest too much time. It's nothing personal, but just keep it moving. When you're macking, like you are, people are going to be into it and you want to meet those people while there's time on the clock, by taking action and overcoming setbacks. Always tell the truth. It's a waste to lie. You don't need to lie. If you tell the truth, the world is your memory. The underwear drops when you come in the room telling your ruthless, unapologetic, fiery, volcanic, explosive, ecstatic, exuberant, sublime, ethereal, melancholy, furious, raging, tsunami-ish truth Deep from the bottom of your soul and you tell it out, and you yell it out, grabbing your crunch, like you always do about this time. That's how you deal with setbacks. As I mentioned before, I get sex. I get laid a lot, and now you are en route to having similar experiences. Just remember nobody gets laid alone. I'd like to thank all of my mentors in the sex game, in the dating game, my fashion consultants, people that put me on and hipped me to what was hap on scenes that I wanted to get involved in. Thank you to all of you and you're welcome to all of you, my students. I hope you stick around and continue to sit at the feet of the master.
Speaker 2:Having followers. You get a lot of sex. If you're successful in any field, there's sex that comes with that. There are groupies involved. So go out, succeed. You can do this. You're already a success. You're getting laid right now. You're getting the slow, deep, wet, loving best hummer of your life. It's already happening. Believe it. This is life, this is your life. Now Go out, get laid, do it. So self-pity, no one is innocent. We all feel innocent. We all feel sorry for ourselves. We feel sorry for ourselves, for feeling sorry for ourselves, for the guilt we feel that comes with that. It's a natural way to think of things. We see things from our own perspective, so when we get hurt, we're going to feel bad for that person, because we are the main character. However, it can be really bad for you if it's indulged into excess.
Speaker 2:It can lead to a sense of learned helplessness, helplessness you taught yourself, which can prevent you from shaking it off getting with the game in the program and getting things done right now to improve things, and then you'll just feel more sorry for yourself because you really are screwing it up, you're missing your opportunities and you've got a negative outlook.
Speaker 2:I'm a pessimist. I think a little bit of negativity is good for us. I don't think you have to be an optimist to get shit done. I think you have to occasionally do stuff that doesn't feel right. If you feel sorry for yourself and develop a pervasively negative outlook, that'll get harder to do.
Speaker 2:If you get in a cul-de-sac of crybaby-ishness, you might isolate yourself. Maybe people isolate yourself. Maybe people isolate you. They don't want to hang out with you or you don't think that they do, because you feel bad about yourself. You want to give yourself comfort but it's not really happening because you don't really know how to do that. There are itches you can't really scratch yourself and we are who we are through the eyes of others. You gotta get with other people and I'm an introvert. That's hard to do, but I do it anyway because isolating myself will shorten my life, possibly dramatically, because I could flip out and kill myself. I've come close before. Lack of resilience is a problem when I have more pain than I have coping resources for it. The only way to really address that is to get out and get with the people. Self-pity makes it hard to do that because I don't trust people. I feel like a leper. I feel scrawny and sickly.
Speaker 1:No, let other people decide.
Speaker 2:Let the critics decide. Am I some kind of performance artist? Am I a genius? Use that word in connection to me. If I do it myself, it doesn't really mean anything. What do I know? You got to give other people a chance to judge you. Don't make assumptions about what kind of negative stuff they're going to think about you. That's victimizing yourself.
Speaker 2:It comes from and creates a loop, the lack of resilience, the strength to get back up because you're sucking yourself dry but seeing yourself as a victim. You don't interpret yourself as somebody that can handle stuff. If you read Psycho-Cybernetics, that's how you create yourself. You are your own great work of art, and self-pity will make you feel like not even a martyr, maybe a wannabe martyr, maybe a failed martyr, denizen of slave morality in the Nietzschean sense. Don't do it, unless you want to. If you get off on it, fine, do that on weekends or in the evenings.
Speaker 2:Otherwise it will affect your relationships. It'll affect you as a lover, a citizen, a volunteer, a friend with benefits. A one-night stand, a zipless fuck All that will be impacted because you'll have trouble building relationships, even fleeting ones, with somebody who's trying to flirt with you in the elevator. You don't even know, because by now you're all the way into full tilt black hole, depression, the D-hole. Prolonged self-pity can get you to the point where, if you already have depression, you're exacerbating it, pouring gasoline on the black flame feeding the black dog, and if you don't have it, you might get a taste of it.
Speaker 2:It'll make you feel depressed. You're in bad company for yourself. Bad company is the worst thing you can have around. If you lean toward anxiety or depression, that includes yourself. So there's nothing wrong. You don't need to feel sorry for yourself. You got this. Don't undermine your own confidence.
Speaker 2:Dwelling on your negative experiences, most of which didn't really happen, the way that you think they did, according to your interpretation, or your drawbacks, which most people don't even know about, it can be a self-fulfilling prophecy, undermining your confidence, leading to stagnation, inaction, worsening depression, irrelevance. You're out of the game, you're not provoking, you're not pushing things forward, you're not participating in the culture, you're not in the agora, you're not in the arena, you're not even really here, and that, of course, is stressful, anxiety provoking. You look to depression for relief from anxiety, and vice versa. So you end up with a lot of both At least I do. I think they're comorbid in a lot of cases, and all of this is just too much going on in your fucking head and people can hear it. They can hear the racket, they can hear the car alarms, the fire alarms, the broken glass, the couples screaming at each other on their fucking Saturday beach trip. It was supposed to be fun. They went around looking for parking, somebody got torqued on the alcohol. People were mad.
Speaker 2:The truth is coming out. We're yelling at each other on what's supposed to be the fun day. Everybody just desperately wants to get back to work or school or prison. There's too much going on in your fucking head. Open the window, let some oxygen into this joint, otherwise you're going to miss opportunities. You're going to not notice when people are trying to throw themselves at you. It's a problem for me. I love bombing. It's the only way to get through to me. I don't take people seriously. It seems like they're into me. The only thing I respond to is basically kidnapping. So I end up in these tense relationships that can be a cause for self-pity. They go awry. Much like self-pity. Then be suffocating. Don't suffocate yourself Again. If that's your thing, do it on weekends. Do it safely. Understand the protocols. Have somebody else around who's going to leave the room they might pretend to, if that's something you get off on. Safety first, last, no, fuck safety.
Speaker 2:You want to have fun, and part of that is not smothering yourself, not killing yourself. Life is about pleasure. Life is a pursuit of self-actualization. Choking yourself off doesn't help, unless you're talking about masturbation, in which case go for it, but otherwise stop feeling sorry for yourself. Jerk off, you'll enjoy it. Relax, smoke and join, chill.
Speaker 2:You don't need to feel sorry for yourself. You're killing this. You're awesome. You're a crystal of fractal stardust from beyond good and evil. I love you personally. I love you so much in the most grown-up way possible. You'll never even understand it.
Speaker 2:But what you can do is just don't feel sorry for yourself. You don't need to. Other people need that. Make other people feel sorry for themselves. Kick their fucking asses If they get in your face. I'm amped up. I'm serious about this. I don't want you talking shit about my friend. You are my friend and you're talking shit about yourself. That doesn't fly here. I'm gonna kick your fucking ass. Get the fuck out of this town. Let me hang out with my friend and chill my friend's good people, the only people starting shit that they aren't willing to finish. I'm gonna finish it for them. Shut the fuck up. You need to feel sorry for yourself. You're fucking killing me.
Speaker 2:It works best with people who have to be responsible and keep it together and look good IRL, because what they need is a place to fall apart. I know how to wreck it. The skills of that are things that you should know, because you never know when you're going to need them, where you're going to be in a situation where people want or need to be dominated. Think about it. Who do you know who's really on the ball? Almost nobody. Nobody really knows what they're doing. Sometimes you do, in that case, bulldoze them. You're doing them a favor.
Speaker 2:People like to be told what to do most of the time. A lot of them are waiting for it. Don't keep them waiting. If you tell them what to do, they will probably do it. If you believe in yourself and you believe in your ideas and you can defend your ideas and you know what's up and you have genuine confidence not what you think it looks like, but what it is, which is something you develop by developing your own integrity, doming yourself first you will have that on standby.
Speaker 2:If you need to dominate in a situation, don't ask, tell. Make the decisions. If the other person objects, take that into consideration. You're not just smacking them around and telling them what to do, you're helping them get what they want. There's nothing people hate worse than getting what they say they want rather than what they really want, or what they think they're supposed to want rather than what they really want, or what they think they're supposed to want rather than what they really want. You are totalizing their psyches like it's your last day on earth and you just got out of prison and you have to go back into prison so you won't be able to see the apocalypse except through those little slits in the rocks that they make prisons out of.
Speaker 2:Skulls Rough. Sex can save the world. We all have those tendencies sadism, masochism, dominant submission that end up poisoning our real lives because we're not owning them for what they are, which is sex stuff Nasty, awesome, amazing. You like it, like I do. I don't have to explain this to you. We get all of that into the bedrooms and the dungeons and occasionally an alley or a movie theater during a showing of something not interesting but not too depressing. Unless that's what you like and I don't kink shame, so go for it. People are having sex less in America and there's an easy solution for that. Start right now. Figure out how to do it. You are someone's fetish. Make yourself available. I had to learn that the hard way because I tend to be oblivious. Love bombing is one of the only ways to get through to me, and you don't get the best, most reliable people that way. You don't get submissives and masochists who are at peace with themselves and know what they're doing, because they want to be smacked around.
Speaker 2:You have to initiate that as part of the deal. You have to take the initiative and lead the dance. When you know what you're doing, and you do that with authority and love, presence, patience, passion, and you care and you're there. They'll be drinking it straight from the tap and loving it. It gives people a chance to fall apart in a discreet, safe, caring environment where they can be dirty and smacked around and used like they know they deserve and want and need for.
Speaker 3:K-Chunk, Los Angeles, 1630 AM. Kchunkradioorg Emerson Dameron's Medicated Minutes. Medicated-minutescom. Levity saves lives. I am so sorry, I'm out. I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad.
Speaker 1:I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad, I am so sad. Outro Music.
