In 1995 American pop culture found a new phrase. Actress Alicia Silverstone’s character in the popular movie, “Clueless” swerved her car to avoid killing a bicyclist. As a laugh line she said, “Whoops! My Bad!” From there the street phrase took on new life as a way of expressing a semi-apology for some mistake. We say, “My bad,” when we forget an appointment or shatter a dish on the kitchen floor. It’s a good thing to admit a mistake that we’ve made. And it could be a clue that we recognize something far more significant about our human nature. “My bad” could lead us to better understand ourselves and our relationship with God.
Welcome to TFJ. I’m Larry Payne, your host. I seek to build your well-being through progressive Christian spirituality, psychology, history, and science. Debates over human nature and our relationship to God stretch back to the dawn of human history. Perhaps it’s time to take a new look to uncover what people who do bad things can learn about themselves and the goodness of God.
I don’t need to waste much time bringing evidence that human beings can really do bad things. You may have been the victim of crime or felt the sting of angry words. Scenes of war are on the nightly news. Lies distort public debate. And I’ll have to admit I’ve done my share of bad actions, angry words, and moral sins.
A more important question is “why?” What is wrong with us? The explanations offered for the reality of human misbehavior have proposed factors such as uncontrolled basic instincts, anxiety, cultural conditioning, or the quest for power.
Traditional Christian doctrine offers a theological reason: humans are sinful. The doctrine of original sin states that Adam passed on a nature of sin that has affected every human being and placed all under the judgment of God to die. God cannot have a meaningful relationship with anyone because of our moral failures. More than admitting “my bad,” this theology says that no one can do anything spiritually worthwhile. Each person is spiritually dead and unable of their own volition to connect with God. Perhaps you have been taught this anthropology that we aren’t people who do some wrong things but instead people who have a total depravity of good. The ideas have left many with scars of estrangement, hopelessness, and shame.
I think this classic theology fails on multiple counts. First, no scientific evidence supports the notion that all of humankind descended from one person, as the ancients thought. We are products of millennia of evolutionary development and varied lines of subspecies. It’s impossible to identify one ancestor as the progenitor or even the representative of everyone else. Adam and Eve are figurative of every person, not actual residents who birthed the human race with a sin gene in our DNA.
Second, we know millions of people around the globe have lived with love, compassion, wisdom, and beauty in the context of many faith traditions. This is evidence humans are not dead to moral realities and depraved with inherent wickedness but alive and capable of striving toward the good as active moral agents. Persons of every nation and religion exhibit extraordinary love and altruism, both of which are hallmarks of the connection with God.
Third, considering human nature, the idea that a person has three distinct parts of body, mind, and a corrupted soul is flawed. Each person is a complex unity of Self, built of genetic, cultural, and existential influences that are in dynamic interaction. There is no separate entity of the Soul locked into evil but a personality with a mix of moral, immoral, wise, foolish, love, and hate. The cruel gang member might choose to die for a friend, and the holy priest may abuse an altar boy. We are in flux from birth to death in crafting and recrafting the Self we claim to be. This flux exposes us to sin and negative actions that we choose for ourselves. We don’t have a soul corrupted by original sin but we do have a Self influenced by original choice. Theologian Karen Strand Winslow writes that biblical stories show the condition “necessary for ethical behavior—the ability to choose based on based on an ability to anticipate consequences, make value judgements, and determine alternative courses of action…emphasize original choice not original sin.” Each of us makes bad choices and are responsible for the consequences. Having these capacities is vital but also afflicts us with the burden of choosing bad or good as a constant in our daily life.
I’m sure each of us knows all about this challenge of making moral choices. Let me ask: how many times have you lied today? Well, you answer is probably a lie, too! The ancients misunderstood some things but they were right on track that everyone is capable of great evil and great good.
How can we address the failures of the good in our lives? A part of the way forward in building the best emotional health and social relationships emerges from psychological research. Good, constructive, and beneficial action can come through owning our actions, solidarity, and spiritual renewal.
A foundation of the quest toward well-being is responsibility for our actions. It’s not healthy to blame the ancient Adam in the garden or a mother who drank too much. Certainly the past affects us in our genes and our family of origin. But each moment we are making choices of how we will act. For example, Jose felt broken-hearted when his mother died of Covid. His buddies laughed at his sadness, saying, “It happens to everyone. You’ll get over it.” Jose could have talked to the guys about his real feelings but it was easier to push those emotions down with another shot of tequila. His choice led to unresolved grief that affected every relationship from then on. Taking responsibility brings the opportunity to make good decisions. James Clear, in his book Atomic Habits, writes, “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you will be.” Think of that for a moment. If we turn this around we can say it is also true that the identity you want to be is built on the actions you take day after day. The more we take ownership of our choices, the more we can intentionally build well-being.
I think a second consideration is in play for moving away from the bad and dysfunctional. We build upon responsibility for our actions by embracing solidarity and community. It’s easier to make the right choices when we see the other person as more like us than different from us. We generally think twice about doing something that would hurt members of our family, church, or neighborhood. Yet, it can be difficult to expand our solidarity. Fear can make us define “different” as “bad.” As a white male I could find it easy to turn away from a predominantly black neighborhood, or cast suspicion on a Jewish rabbi. This is a product of what psychology calls “implicit bias.” Each of us has subconscious filters through which we strain each experience. For instance, tall people may be perceived as better leaders, Black young men as dangerous, or poor people as lazy. We can’t completely escape this unconscious distortion. But we can learn to balance it with wisdom and solidarity with the larger community.
When I was a Baptist pastor I attended many baseball games to cheer on my boys. At one of them I fell in conversation with a Catholic priest, Father Tash. Our churches sat side-by-side on the same street. We developed a friendship that broke the barriers of our denominational doctrines, both of which said the other didn’t have the right formula of faith to be approved by God. Over the years that followed we shared some ecumenical worship services, community projects, and meals. We embraced a solidarity that overcame the differences to build the good. He was a brother of faith that I will see in Heaven.
This leads to a final idea for diminishing the “My bad” style of actions. We can renew our spirituality by embracing the truth of God in loving relationship to us. We should push away from a flawed theology which believes God has rejected us in holy wrath. In my opinion, this doesn’t square with the Bible witness which describes God acting in reciprocal and loving relationship to everyone. The Bible shows God in love does not pull back from people but works constantly to nurture, inspire, and enliven us. From the call of a pagan man named Abram, to the message of an activist prophet named Jeremiah, to the forgiveness of a betrayer named Peter, the Scripture tells of God who is always present, loving and reponding no matter what we have done or thought. We are in a dance of mutual relationship in which God brings an initial aim of good and growth every moment. Theologian Robert Rice says this Open Theism “recaptures the biblical portrait of a God who is intimately acquainted with, acutely sensitive to, profoundly affected by, and dynamically interactive with the creatures who bear the divine image.” As the gospel of John says, “[God’s] light was the light of all people” (John 1:4). There is a loving grace from God that is life-giving for every human being. God has been connected with billions of people since the earliest hominid and is at work in every nanosecond now to deepen that relationship with me and you.
This perspective can have a profound affect on our choices for good. Psychology has shown that our beliefs are the source of our emotional response and actions. What we have come to think about our self-identity is a foundation for all aspects of our life. Faith traditions are central to our construction of meaning in daily life. For instance, if I develop cancer, it will make a difference whether I think God is punishing me, or whether I hold that God is experiencing suffering with me. The open theism I described, which trusts God as present and responsive, fosters energy for moral choices and social thriving.
Hensley was on a church trip when she contracted a life-threatening infection. Days in the hospital led to months of treatment. She fixed the blame squarely on God but took the anger out on herself and others. She became depressed and lost touch with the church members who had been on the trip. In desperation she opened herself to talk with a counselor. Theologically, we can believe that this relational God never stopped influencing this angry young woman toward good. Her beliefs began to shift, gaining wisdom about disease, suffering, and the possibilities of a new life story. The anger and depression slowly lifted with renewed hope.
A movie may have taught us to say, “My bad!” It’s been a laugh line and semi-apology. But acknowledging I am responsible for what I do is the foundation of doing better. Faith and science show we have the capacity to make choices for good when we take responsibility and increase solidarity. Each of us has a long way to go in this journey to well-being, myself included. But God is at work within us for health and wholeness.
CITED
“The meaning and origin of the phrase My Bad.” The Phrase Finder, accessed March 8, 2023. https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/my-bad.html
Karen Strand Winslow, “Original Choice, not Original Sin.” https://www.academia.edu/23778135/Original_Choice_not_Original_Sin
Richard Rice, The Future of Open Theism. IVP Academic, 2020. Page 133
James Clear, Atomic Habits: Tiny changes, remarkable results. Avery Penguin House, 2019. Page 39