A Force To Be Reckoned With
A Force To Be Reckoned With
216. Thanksgiving Traditions: Connection Over Perfection
Ever wondered what it truly means to be thankful without the pressure of perfection?
With a healthy dose of humor and a pinch of nostalgia, we’re hitting pause to reflect on what truly matters: family, home, and the incredible community that shapes our lives. Because sometimes, it’s the little things—like snuggling up under twinkling lights by a cozy Christmas tree—that help us slow down and savor the season.
We’re also getting real about the pressures of social media’s perfectly curated holiday moments. Spoiler alert: the magic isn’t in the picture-perfect decor or traditions; it’s in the laughter, the connection, and yes, even the chaos. We're here to embrace the imperfections and find joy in those unfiltered moments with the people we love most.
Drawing inspiration from the story of Samuel and David, we’ll talk about the beauty of being faithful in the small things and trusting in divine timing. It’s all about slowing down, soaking in the season, and choosing presence over pressure.
So grab a turkey leg, settle in, and let’s share some Thanksgiving gratitude together.
Episode Highlights:
- What we’re thankful for.
- Thanksgiving Traditions.
- It’s about heart posture.
Links Mentioned in Episode/Find More on A Force to Be Reckoned With:
- Jointheforce.us
- Follow us on Instagram @bethanyadkins
- Find us on Youtube!
This show has been produced by Adkins Media Co.
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Speaker 2:So the questions are who's the fight against, and are we winning or losing? We're the Adkins, and we are a force to be reckoned with.
Speaker 1:Are you ready to join the force? Hey, everybody oh, you hit record yep. Happy thanksgiving week hola, senors and senoritas, can you even believe.
Speaker 2:Can you even believe that it's the end of November?
Speaker 1:No dude, this year went by so fast.
Speaker 2:I was just mapping out our week last night and I was like how are we here? I feel like it was just November 1st, I don't even know what happened.
Speaker 1:Dude, I feel like it was just May yeah.
Speaker 2:It's crazy.
Speaker 1:It was supposed to be the year man 2024. I like that number.
Speaker 2:And now look at us. Now it's almost over. And we're and nothing's new. No, I'm just kidding. Okay, so it's Thanksgiving week. We just wanted to have a little Thanksgiving episode. I guess I'll say so to kick her off. Corey, I'm going to hit you with the rapid fire this week.
Speaker 1:That you're going to have to answer. I know I know, you realize that I'm, I know that everybody out there.
Speaker 2:If you can't answer these quickly, then we might have to.
Speaker 1:I know that most people out there they look at me and like man, that guy's so smart. But I'm really not. I have to really think about things.
Speaker 2:Okay, question this is it.
Speaker 1:Okay, are you ready?
Speaker 2:Yep Three things you're thankful for.
Speaker 1:My wife. Aww for my wife um my this, my family um, and I'm hopeful at the for the future.
Speaker 2:So I'm grateful for hope. Yeah, okay, I will say um, I, I didn't even prep myself for this. Now I'm struggling, my family I would agree with that and our house just a place to live, and it's not perfect, but it's ours and, I'll say, the community that we live in. I was trying to do different than yours. Obviously, I'm thankful for you.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, Bull crap. Obviously I'm thankful for you.
Speaker 2:You guys all see, we live in a great community and that's so dumb I wasn't going to. I shouldn't have said that. What the community? Yeah, but we do.
Speaker 1:I mean it's good. I didn't say that we do have a good community.
Speaker 2:We have a good school system.
Speaker 1:That's why we wanted to raise our kids here. I mean, it's not perfect either Nothing is but like. That's why it was important to us to have our to raise. That we didn't even truly know yet.
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay, so we're literally recording this in real time, pretty much.
Speaker 1:What do?
Speaker 2:you mean in real time. Normally we will bulk record, so this might have been recorded in October. But this is truly the week of Thanksgiving, it's Sunday night.
Speaker 1:It's oh my gosh, what it's. My favorite numbers, kind of it's 11, 24, 24.
Speaker 2:Yeah, man, you're just having a lucky streak of that, and the book excerpt that you're reading out of today is off out of page 24. Let's go man maybe we should play the lottery.
Speaker 2:I'm also 24 years old and you're delusional. Okay, so it's the week of Thanksgiving. I love this season, I love fall. I know you struggle because it's cold, but I just love the coziness of it and being in our house and having our fireplace on and especially Thanksgiving. I was thinking about this as we were getting our christmas tree out, which we did get it out normally we get it out thanksgiving, like you know the black friday basically, but it is a short time between shorter time between thanksgiving and christmas this year because thanksgiving's late.
Speaker 2:So we got our tree out and I was kind of sad to put our fall decor away, because I really love thanksgiving. There's just something so cozy about it and I we ever since I've been little we go to my grandma rose's and she's just made it so fun and so quite frankly, I thought it was delusional what we have our christmas tree out.
Speaker 1:I haven't even taken a bite of a turkey leg yet, bro yeah well, Like what are we doing?
Speaker 2:I did just see something on social media today that said the turkey tastes the same, even with the tree up.
Speaker 1:No, it doesn't, so shut up. No, it tastes a little IPA-ish, a little bit like a little pine tree-ish. Okay, so, all tree-ish. Okay, so, all right. But okay, one more question, we're going to talk about social media memes, thanksgiving traditions.
Speaker 2:Do you have a fun? This is before we dive in an episode. Do you have a fun? Thanksgiving tradition? Um it can be from your childhood. It can be something we do now.
Speaker 1:Oh, back in my childhood. I mean, I like turkey, I love eating turkey. But I think since we've been married, one of my favorite things has been that we are at your grandparents and I smash on some food. We all get kind of super tired and then I sneak away from the giant family area and into the living room and just sit on the couch, watch a little football, sometimes, snooze out a little bit okay, all right, I'm glad that sounds great.
Speaker 2:Meanwhile, me in the other room, my favorite Thanksgiving tradition is getting to catch a little 15 minute nap meanwhile me in the other room drowning with. We had 7 kids last year. Where is Cory?
Speaker 1:I don't think I did it last year. I'm just kidding last year was different. Oh yeah, you didn't do it last year.
Speaker 2:I'm just kidding last year was different, it would do oh yeah, you didn't do it last year, that's right, that's right, no, okay.
Speaker 1:So for me, I just, I love the feeling of waking up in the morning and I've, you know, make cinnamon rolls for the kids watching the parade, and then, yeah, what I know, my actual favorite one, more so than that, is listening to rush limbaugh tell the true thanksgiving story and, especially since he passed away, like still being able to listen to that with the kids on our way to your grandma's to just so they understand the history and of thanksgiving and what we're truly thankful for and who we're thankful for yeah, that's good, really good.
Speaker 1:And then how was that?
Speaker 2:that was great, because I was just gonna follow it up by something even more meaningful monkey balls oh, what are these things actually supposed to be called?
Speaker 1:they're monkey balls aren't they like chocolate truffles?
Speaker 2:oh yeah, they're called oreo truffles, which this dates back to when cory and I were dating in college and I was poor and you know you want to come contribute something to the family and I would go to cory's thanksgiving uh, family thanksgiving and I, this girl that I worked with at baity sports of all places, back in the day, when I worked at Beatty's, she gave me this recipe, for she called them monkey balls. Well, actually, she brought them into our work around.
Speaker 2:I didn't even know the origins of yeah and she was like oh, they're so easy, and so I made them and it's literally a pack of oreos, a pack of cream cheese. You crunch them all up, stir them up together, and then you dip them in chocolate, and then you can freeze them, they're really good. Or you can eat them warm they're good frozen they're good frozen. Yeah, but started making them back then and have made them mostly every year since.
Speaker 1:I think it has been every single year.
Speaker 2:Pretty much, but I will say I wasn't going to do it this year. And the other thing is I made these little.
Speaker 1:But they were a hit.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they were a hit. Like everybody loves them, yeah. And then I make these little Oreo cookies. It's like two Oreos. They're turkeys, they look like turkeys, but it's one of those pinterest fails that they're supposed to be really cute and mine never are. And it's how we announced that we were having liberty. We put bows on the turkeys the one year pink bows and then we basically now the tradition is that we just have a contest. Each person makes one and it's whoever's is. We say the best, but it's kind of whoever's is the ugliest. So wasn't gonna do it this year. But, um, one of my sisters texted and was like are we gonna? Are we making turkeys?
Speaker 1:so we're doing it. Somebody still likes the turkeys I'm not gonna lie I've never liked the turkeys what do you mean?
Speaker 2:you never like eating them or making them.
Speaker 1:I mean kind of both, because I know that they're going to be hard to eat, because I like my Oreos dipped in.
Speaker 2:And you don't like arts and crafts.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I'm not an arts and crafts.
Speaker 2:And I don't like candy corn. Well, yeah, but it's more just the fun of doing it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I like the fun of making monkey balls and eating them.
Speaker 2:Yeah, making monkey balls and eating them yeah, well this goes into traditions as a whole and traditions with the holiday and just talking about taking the pressure off of traditions oh yeah so, like you don't really enjoy to make, enjoy making the turkeys and that's personally.
Speaker 1:But let me know like I enjoy being with everybody else while it's taking place and getting to watch our kids do it and stuff too.
Speaker 2:Yeah. But I will say, when it comes to being a mom and all of these traditions I just put, I think a lot of us do, especially because I feel like I say this every week. But just there's so much good stuff out on social media and you're like, oh, I should do that, I should do this, I should do that, I should do this, I should do that. And then we put all this unrealistic pressure on ourselves and then we feel like I have to make it this perfect. You know, not even should I make cinnamon rolls, but they should be homemade sourdough, from scratch cinnamon rolls. And we just put all this like dumb pressure on ourselves and then you end up not even enjoying the holiday.
Speaker 1:I feel like some people do it because they feel like they see these other people on social media and they're all perfect and doing all this stuff and it's like dude, you have no idea what was going on in their house that day. Like nobody's perfect, but I would say is like, as far as traditions go, I mean and this goes back for like all of time traditions aren't made meant to be like dogmatic. Like if you're forcing traditions then it's kind of pointless. Like traditions are supposed to be like fun and enjoyable. So like I think it's okay to get new ideas and try some new things out and see what sticks and what the family might like to do and what, what creates memories and what actually is a good time.
Speaker 2:But like if it's not fun for you and it becomes a stress point for you or for your family, like dude, don't do it yeah, so this might um throw you for a loop and we can cut it out, but are you also referring to like biblical traditions when you say that?
Speaker 1:No, but I mean, if it's not something that is like there's a difference between traditions and like the right things to do in the Bible I'm talking about—.
Speaker 2:Well, actually I think you might be onto something. I mean, we're just totally winging this. We didn't talk about this beforehand, but like I do think it is what I'm referring to in the holidays and what you're referring to with, like the like, dogmatic traditions, like it's they're not supposed to be yeah it is, it's all heart posture.
Speaker 1:So even with like uh, which it's not the word, traditions, it's something else, um like sabbath and um well, yeah, I mean, if you want to get deep like in, I mean, that's what jesus came to, kind of, jesus was rejected against like the pharisees was that they'd made all of these quote unquote traditions and laws that weren't uh, that were. They were following them without the right heart and it wasn't the point of actually following that specific quote unquote law or or Jewish tradition. It was about why you did it. You know what I mean. So and that goes back to even the Thanksgiving or Christmas tradition is like why are you doing it? Are you doing it to have fun and have a good time and create memories of your family? Are you just doing it to try to force your family to do stuff and yourself to do stuff and put all this pressure on it and it's not fun just so that you can have something to take a picture of or put on Instagram?
Speaker 2:That is the case I mean think about when? Yeah, it's about a heart posture. I don't remember what bible verse it is, and that man looks at the outward appearance and the lord looks at the heart well, that is, that's actually. I was in my david book really look what I had pulled up on my phone yeah, first yeah, that's, that's part of that's going on in my in my, I love it when we don't plan this out good and it still works out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but I was actually going to talk about when Jesus and the disciples they picked some wheat or something out of the field on Sabbath because they were hungry and they got like scolded by the Pharisees because you're not supposed to pick. But they weren't supposed to pick, but they you weren't supposed to work or whatever. And and Jesus performed a miracle on the Sabbath and they were giving him a hard time for that and it was like you're missing the whole point of Sabbath. Man wasn't made for Sabbath. Sabbath was made for man and that was the heart posture.
Speaker 1:It's like these traditions weren't. You weren't made to follow the tradition. The traditions were for you so that you could have fun. It was like Sabbath. Sabbath was made for you so that you would rest and take time with your family and take time to be with God. And when, instead, you made, you put Sabbath on the throne, yeah, and it was like that's not what it was for, but I mean so yeah well, yeah, and so maybe this is only making sense to us, and somebody who's way smarter than us is gonna be like you idiots.
Speaker 2:How, how can you even like parallel these two things? But talking about that and then talking about the thanksgiving story, what is thanksgiving for?
Speaker 2:it was a celebration right and so it thanksgiving was birthed out of this big feast and celebration and like moment to give thanks, and it was like one of the most like god, after a very hard time yeah, and and so now, translating that to 2024, and the mom who is like scrambling to make it perfect and have the perfect centerpiece and have everything decorated and have everything Pinterest worthy and perfect cinnamon rolls and like all of these traditions, it's the same thing, isn't it?
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's just like we.
Speaker 1:And even worse than Thanksgiving is Christmas.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Everybody scrambles. They think they got to pick out the right presents and we got to wear the exact right clothes and we got to all. Make sure you put out your Christmas card and you send it to everybody and don't forget the person that you sent out to the Christmas card. And make sure your family has the perfect picture with the perfect outfit. And make sure on Christmas Day and Christmas week you're bouncing around to 45 different houses to make everybody else happy.
Speaker 2:Meanwhile you're burning yourself out, burning your kids out, and the whole point was we were celebrating the birth of our Lord and Savior, jesus Christ, yeah, and so that is what I wanted to talk about on this episode, which we basically just did is just, I think that it's all about a heart, a heart posture, which I know we've talked about this before and I know we talk about it often, but I think it's just so worth reminding myself and reminding other people of, because it's so easy to like. You can hear this and you're like, oh yeah, that makes sense, I'm gonna do this, and then three days later, it's like you're caught back up in the hustle and bustle, so you just need to find things that bring you back to reality.
Speaker 1:We do this so much.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what.
Speaker 1:Like, if you think we do this to so many different, think about weddings.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Think about the bride and the groom. Especially the bride, like freaking out because she's got to make her family happy or make her mother-in-law happy and oh, I got to invite this many people and we got to have this right food and so-and-so, can't sit with so-and-so and it's like this is your day, right? It's funny. I always tell any bride that I'm around on their wedding day. I always tell them like remember, this is your day. Like who gives a flying rip what your mother-in-law thinks, or your parents or whomever? Like it's not their day, yeah. Like invite who you want to bite, have what food you want to have, wear what dress you want to wear, have what music you want Like it's.
Speaker 2:It's just about taking the pressure off, yeah, and getting back to the heart of it.
Speaker 1:Like these big moments that we have. Like, if you think about it, if you're 80 years old, you only had 80 Christmases. You only had 80 Christmases. You only had 80 Thanksgivings. Like they only come once a year and we put so much pressure on these moments.
Speaker 2:Yeah, shifting, I mean, that's pretty much it, that's pretty much the sum of it. So it's like, how, practically, how do we do that? And I don't I mean other than continuing to remind our friends and ourselves of it. I think that it's just like praying for that heart posture, which I'm going to be doing, that it's Sunday, I'm going to be doing that every day this week, and I'm not even hosting Thanksgiving. I'm just taking a couple sides, you know, and having making monkey balls the night before, like that's it. But it's just like I want it to be perfect, and sometimes the perfection is just being present and and accepting like it doesn't have to turn out the way that you envision and envisioned it in your head for it to still be good and you so often don't remember what you did.
Speaker 1:You don't remember exactly what the food tasted like, or uh or like, say, like our family tradition of going to see christmas lights, so you don't even remember exactly what lights you looked at and what was the coolest, like you only remember the feeling right, and so if you're feeling like a ball of stress and you're grumpy and you're angry and everything is like tense in your home, that's what you're gonna remember that's gonna be the feeling, and that's gonna be the feeling for your kids and then they're not gonna want
Speaker 1:to like any of the things that you did right, right.
Speaker 2:So yeah, and I think also the the beautiful. Second beautiful thing about these holiday weekends is just it allows us time and space and margin it.
Speaker 2:It is kind of like a sabbath in itself to just be present and recharge and spend time with people that we love that we don't get to do like spend time with every week and when we get caught in the traditions and the hustle and bustle of it, we're taking away from those moments too, from those conversations to have, from those times with people that maybe we only get to see during this time of year and for also for like brain space for us to just sit and process and digest from like a heart and a posture of true gratitude.
Speaker 2:Yeah, into what you and I were talking earlier about. You were reading this book on David, which has nothing to do with Thanksgiving or the Thanksgiving holiday, but it also does kind of tie in because when we we're operate from this posture of like gratitude and presence and really soaking in the moment, I think that it's in those places where we figure out where God is leading us, and it's in those conversations and in those moments. And then you know what I mean. It's not in the bulldozing our way through the hustle and bustle and you know having no margin and just being so you know crazy about it. So, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So just just to put a cap on the traditions thing is have traditions. Traditions are great. Yeah, it's just the heart behind it, like it's supposed to be about fun and feeling and connection. So if it's not doing that for you and your family, then it's something the heart behind it like it's supposed to be about fun and feeling and connection.
Speaker 1:So if it's not doing that, for you and your family, then it's something you dread, yeah, then scrap it. If it's something you got that you look forward to and I'm not talking about your teenager that's just being a little jack wagon, but your family as a whole if it's like something that's fun and you guys enjoy, then do it and stick with it and those will be the memories that you make and those will be the ones that stick and that your kids are going to want to do with their families when they have their own, when they're adults and have their own families too. But this, this, this little tiny like page in the book I'm reading about David, was just talking about. You know, a lot of times we talk about like God's will and and knowing if you're in God's will and what God wants you to do, and things Cause.
Speaker 1:It was talking about how God's solutions are often strange and simple. So be open. It says go where I tell you to go. I've got a simple answer Don't make the carrying out of God's will complicated. It isn't. Stay open to his strange yet simple solutions.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, that's the thing I love about God and about Jesus and how Jesus operated when he was on earth. It was, it was slow and it was simple, and it was the exact opposite of how I operate and how so many of us in this American culture operate. And so I was thinking about this episode, I was preparing for it a little bit earlier today, and then you, we were sitting on the couch and you kind of read this little excerpt from the book that you just read and it just kind of reminded me like it really does all tie together.
Speaker 2:When we're obedient, in the moments of just being present and being slow and having that posture, just like I was saying before, that's where God speaks to us, that's where he directs us. And read it one more time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, there's. I'm going to read the couple underlines, and there's one other thing I was going to add. So it says God's solutions are often strange and simple, so be open.
Speaker 2:Be open. Gonna, so, it says. God's solutions are often strange and simple. So be open, be open. That was what that was. The part that stuck out to me was like am I open in everyday life and, and especially like in this, coming into this long weekend where I'm so looking forward to a long weekend and a break and a rest, but am I allowing for that?
Speaker 1:am I allowing, or am I just filling it with, like the craze of everything else and I think that we get caught up in doing that, and so, because we continue to get caught up in doing that, we kind of lose the direction that god is leading us yeah, yeah, and so like, and leading up to this, I'm reading a book on David, and so like, kind of leading up to this, they were talking about how, like King Saul stepped out of God's will and so God was picking a new king and he told Samuel to go to Bethlehem and meet with-.
Speaker 2:Bethlehem.
Speaker 1:Is that Bethlehem, bethlehem, bethlehem? I've always said Bethlehem. I don not Bethlehem, bethlehem, bethlehem. I've always said Bethlehem.
Speaker 2:I don't know, maybe I'm wrong.
Speaker 1:I don't know you could be onto something I can.
Speaker 1:I mean this isn't the first time I haven't pronounced something wrong anyways and to find Jesse and his and among Jesse's family you would find the new King. And make a long story short. David's the youngest, he wasn't even there and he's the one. And David was out tending the flock, he was the shepherd and they say that David is a man after God's own heart. And it's like David was just being faithful in the little, you know kind of sucky and small responsibilities that he was given about tending the sheep. And he's out there, you know, fighting off bears and lions and stuff to tend the sheep and he was just like this nobody, that nobody knew anything of.
Speaker 1:And that's what led kind of to this part was when they saying God simply said to Samuel go where, I tell you to go. I've got a simple answer. Like the answer was simple he was telling Samuel just go there and I'll show, I'll show you who's going to be king. And it wasn't like this big, complicated thing that he was making Samuel do and David was being faithful in the small thing. The other part I was going to say is it says I know what I'm doing in a sudden and surprising moment. You be ready, I know where you are, I know how to find you, you just stay ready as you carry out your job. So, like David was being faithful in the small things, had no idea he was going to be, you know, anointed king, and when he was ready, god found him. And it's like sometimes we try to force things.
Speaker 1:Or overcomplicate, and overcomplicate things, when really like just.
Speaker 2:He just wants us to show up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and obeying God and obey him, just obey him, be faithful, and it's simple. Sometimes it's really hard, right, like obeying God can be really hard and difficult to do, but it's so simple, it's not this really difficult thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's good. Yeah, so I think that's it. I just want to encourage you guys that if you're listening to this, you know when it comes out and it's before the holiday. You know when it comes out and it's before the holiday. I just want to encourage you guys to find even five minutes to just kind of sit and quiet and ask God to make it clear where he wants you this season and what he with you guys. That we just go out with our families and we continue to be peaceful presences and happy presences and that the traditions that we continue to carry out are the ones that matter and make a difference and make an impact in our kids and the generations to come.
Speaker 1:And yeah, Save me a turkey leg.
Speaker 2:And happy Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1:Happy Thanksgiving you.