ADHD Awareness Month '24: Part 8

This mini episode is the penultimate of a mid-series-mini-series created for ADHD Awareness Month 2024. This October's theme is 'Awareness is Key', so I'm sharing the 'key' pieces of ADHD awareness the ADHDAF Community need the world to know and amplifying the voices of those that have gone unheard for far too long.  NOTHING ABOUT US WITHOUT US!

Enormous thanks to Toni, Louise & Kirsty for volunteering their voices and for all of their support!

It's ALMOST ADHDAF DAY! We invite you to join us online THIS FRIDAY: 25th Oct for the THIRD ANNUAL ADHDAF DAY! In which we paint the world leopard print to raise ADHD Awareness. Simply wear at least one leopard print item on 25/10/24 to stand in solidarity with the leopard print army and post a selfie or video on your socials sharing the special message you want the world to know about ADHD, then tag @adhdafpodcast and hashtag: #ADHDAFDay and I will reshare your messages for the world to see and hear us at this desperately needed time of ADHD diagnosis crisis and medication shortages.

Trigger warning: Contains swearing and mentions of sensitive subject matter some may find triggering; mental health struggles, divorce, childhood struggles, ableism, bullying, misdiagnosis, medical negligence, low self esteem, mental health crisis, suicide

If you are in need of support YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There is immediate help out there so please REACH OUT
Search the ADHD Medication Directory if you are struggling to access medication during the national medication shortage HERE
Listen to Riyadh Khalaf's self support stratergies for ADHDers HERE
FIND OUT about ADHDAF+ Charity HERE

- Alongside ADHD Awareness month it is also Menopause Awareness Month. Find out more about Menopause HERE and listen to Dr Nighat Arif explain Multi Hormone Sensitivity Theory and how hormones impact ADHD HERE
- It's also Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I'm in awe of the INCREDIBLE work of the late Kris Hallenga. Sign up for self examination reminders from her charity Coppafeel HERE
- AND it's Domestic Violence Awareness Month: Resources for support curated by @feminist HERE

You can connect with literally likeminded legends and support the continuation of this podcast by joining the Patreon Peer Support Community
Enormous thanks to the Members for keeping this podcast going for over 2 years!

PLEASE SHARE this episode and write a review/hit those stars, because doing so means that these episodes will spread far and wide. Each one contains important information that society NEEDS to know about ADHD and from the very people whose voices have gone unheard for too long!

Let's join forces this ADHD Awareness month
TOGETHER WE CAN MAKE CHANGE HAPPEN!
Myself and the Leopard Print Army thank you so much for your support and hope to see you on socials in Leopard Print this Friday!
Laura x

Transcript

  This is the penultimate episode in a mid series mini series as part of ADHD Awareness Month 2024. So, there were meant to be eight mini episodes, but there's one more to come. This year's theme is Awareness is Key. And I've asked the members of the ADHD AF online peer support community The leopard print army, what key pieces of awareness they want raised.

So I'm using the platform to amplify the voices that have gone unheard. Those that have been misdiagnosed, mistreated and misheard for far too long. What you're about to hear are three little segments from three crucial conversations held over zoom with the community members. Please bear in mind that this isn't studio recording quality because this isn't a studio recorded podcast.

These are informal but very important chats had over Zoom. So if we get a little bit warbly or there's a little bit of a robot underwater voice, you know why. But please persevere and listen and please do share.  Each one of these legends raise such important points that are essential for society to be made aware of.

Please do have a read of the description before listening on to avoid hearing any topics that you might find triggering. In those show notes you will also find a link to free and immediate support so if you are in need. Please do reach out. I'm now going to leave you with the wise and important words of Tony, Louise and Kirstie. 

Hi, my name is Tony and I was diagnosed with ADHD age 46. I was also diagnosed at university with dyslexia and I was told I had a type A personality and that was age 24. So I've had 20 years of wondering what is wrong with me, um, and not understanding that it was actually ADHD. And I'm quite disappointed that the university didn't pick that up, but I was a young girl, so obviously that's why I was misdiagnosed.

My diagnosis story was pretty simple, that I got diagnosed in nine months. I managed to get to the top of the waiting list. I got my diagnosis and assessment really quickly, so I was quite fortunate in that way. But what I would like the world to know about ADHD is how much it hurts people when they question our diagnosis.

So I, because I've masked for all my life, I've got a quite professional job and I do quite important things in my work life. So when I talk to people about my ADHD. including family and friends, they often go, really? I don't think you've got it. That really, really hurts. Would we say that to somebody if they said, I've got arthritis?

Would we go, really? Have you, we wouldn't do that with any other condition. And the fact that it's so normal for everybody to be able to do that. When you say those words, just think about the impact they're having on that person. Like for me, 20 years of not, not knowing why I was making all these mistakes.

When the doctor validated it and said, this is my condition, it was so life changing for me. But then when friends and family or general people question it, I just go right back to the beginning. It takes me right back to the bottom of the roller coaster or the top. And then I have to go through all that honesty again, all that self questioning, all that self doubt.

Just think, would you say that to somebody with arthritis, diabetes, you know, any other condition you wouldn't. So please think twice about that. If you've got that opinion in your head, keep it there. Cause that's where it needs to stay.  Hi, I'm Louise. I'm up in the Highlands in Inverness. I was also Anita Dram at Flackstock when I did the burlesque workshop. 

Yeah, I've got ADHD. Found out about two years ago now. So I think the main thing I wanted people to know about ADHD, and I think, as it did say, Um, I just kind of want to expand on that a little bit, just the fact that, you know, we all have different types. We've all got different,  um, it could be hyperactive, could be an attentive, could be both, could be different severities.

And even within that, there are so many little nuances to each single person with ADHD  that you can never assume, you know, let people tell you how they like they're affected. Right. It's good to make people feel safe and that they can just be themselves and that they're not going to be judged for anything.

Um, we're all pretty open bunch. If anything, we're very much oversharers, so  always ask. We will happily tell you most things. If we start talking about it, we usually won't stop.  And I think just as well, like, The nice thing is about sort of speaking about it is it gives people that safety to come to you as well.

I found since I've been diagnosed the amount of people that I've got in touch who have possibly known my whole life or just met and it's mentioned and they've come to me later and been like, Can I ask you questions because I suspect I have it or I know somebody with it and I want to know how to support them.

Can you just give me some information? And that's been brilliant just to know that you can encourage that and you can be supportive and understanding of other people's experiences  and to just, yeah, keep getting that knowledge out there because it's not, it's not a one size fits all. Unfortunately, we're all trying to figure out our own  ways about things.

We find out new bits and pieces every day. I only found out from listening to the episode the other day that of a way that I'm affected that I hadn't even realized before. And it just dawned on me then. So  there's always something more to learn. So yeah, we can find the nice thing is there are people out there, big community of people who understand, won't judge you to learn from each other really.

It's easy for ourselves to be ableist actually. And yeah, a bit of ableism within ourselves and the community at times where we don't realize that kind of constant feeling of I should be able to do that  and getting annoyed at yourself for not being in positions in life that you think you should be at by now or why can't I manage this?

Why can't I?  And yeah, I'm bad at forcing myself to do things because I don't see why I can't  and then  getting annoyed because I can't  and then I'll have a full breakdown and be like,  well, I mean, you've, yeah, you knew you've done that five times and it's never worked. Why would it work this time? But. 

Yeah, I think it's, we do have that, and then we also can look at other people and be like, I can't believe they've just done that, I can't believe they said this, or they reacted that way, and  it's then also being aware that that's possibly not what they meant,  that we have, you know, we've got different neural networks, so we will understand things completely different  to how somebody said it, or  they just,  yeah, we might have just been having complete miscommunication or misunderstanding, and it's so easy done without realizing that  We kind of need to give ourselves and others that space to be like, okay, can we  just break this down a little bit and figure out what's going on before both of us get angry or get angry at ourselves?

And I can go into full meltdowns where I just blame myself for everything and I'll be horrible to myself. And that's, that negative self talk will really, really ramp up.  And it's really hard to just get yourself out of that cycle and be like, wait a minute, you know why this is When you're in that,  no, you can't see that. 

Getting a bit better. I've got reminders sometimes to be like, you know, this is, this happens, here's the backup plan, but I forget I've got a backup plan, or I forget where the reminder is to tell myself to be nice to myself.  Hi, I'm Kirsty, I'm in Oxfordshire. Um, I was diagnosed with combined ADHD in January last year, aged 41.

Um, having realized early on in 2021 that it explained everything about me. Um, over the previous 20 years, I've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder in my early 20s, but I only discovered that fun fact after requesting my medical records in 2022. Diagnosed with clinical depression. Um, Generalised Anxiety Disorder and then finally Bipolar 2, for which I was medicated accordingly.

A deeply unpleasant experience and very unhelpful. Um, it took over a year to convince my GP to refer me right to choose after local services stopped taking referrals. Once they did, I waited four months. Then it was another seven months to start titration, which was paused due to the medication shortages.

Eventually restarted in April this year. I've just had my shared care agreed and for that I'm incredibly grateful as many aren't so fortunate. To those who say we just want a label, you are wrong. A lot of us have already been labelled incorrectly our entire lives. What we're looking for is answers. I went round in circles for years, not understanding what was wrong with me, knowing they weren't getting it right, and I nearly didn't make it.

I am the one at the fore. Most of us late diagnosed are exhausted from playing our whole lives on extreme mode.  We deserve a fair chance at what life has to offer, and we have to keep fighting until we're the exception and not the norm. Early diagnosis saves lives, particularly in girls and women. It shouldn't take this long for us to be seen and heard, and it has to stop here.

Oh, it really does. It has to stop here. Things have to change. We have to continue to fight and push for systemic change. And the way we do that is together. So we would be extremely grateful if you could help us raise ADHD awareness this month by sharing this episode. You can also help us by hitting those stars, writing a review, or if you're listening on Spotify by commenting on the Q& A.

As each of those things helps to get the word out there and spread these crucial messages far and wide. If you'd like to connect with a whole host of like minded legends like these three, you can join the ADHD AF peer support community via the link in the show notes, where you will also find a link to free and immediate support.

I will also put a link. To find out more about ADHD AF plus charity, though, only in its infancy, we're just starting out this podcast. And in turn, the community has been the inspiration behind this charity connecting and empowering ADHD adults of marginalized genders. Although all things ADHD AF will fundraise for the charity, it is an entirely separate entity.

Over the coming months, we will get cracking in England and Wales, and once we are fully up and running, we will be extending it into Scotland also. Follow along on socials on ADHD AF plus the word plus. I'm very, very excited to tell you, this coming Friday, is the third annual ADHD AF Day, which is an online event in which we paint the world leopard print to raise ADHD awareness.

All you have to do to take part is simply wear leopard print. As many or as few items as you like, something as small as a handbag or a scrunchie, or you can go head to toe. And then you can stand in solidarity online with our Leopard Print Army by posting a selfie or video of yourself in Leopard Print, explaining what you would most like the world to know about ADHD.

Then just tag ADHD AF day, and we can watch as we paint the world Leopard Print once again to get the world. To hear us all roar. And if you don't know why the ADHD AF community wear leopard print, I explain more in the previous mini episodes, all of which we would be so incredibly grateful if you could share.

Let's join forces and get the world to listen to us this ADHD Awareness Month. The system has got to change. Lives depend on it.