As I reflect on a pivotal moment where the relentless forces of nature revealed to me the true essence of resilience, this episode unfurls a tapestry of personal empowerment amidst suffering.
I invite you to join me as we embark on an intimate exploration of suffering, its impermanence, and the remarkable strength that blossoms from embodying our experiences. Through the narrative of my own transformation and the insights gained from nature's cycles, we'll uncover how to navigate the emotional terrain that often imprisons us in sorrow and emerge with a heart filled with compassion.
In 5 simple steps this dialogue serves as an invitation to consider how the relationships we nurture can become vessels for healing, and how we can support one another in our collective quest for a life interwoven with love and meaningful connections. Join me, and let's traverse this transformative landscape together.
Please be aware that some practices can bring up deep fears and you may need to seek professional support. You can reach out to me if you need guidance.
As I reflect on a pivotal moment where the relentless forces of nature revealed to me the true essence of resilience, this episode unfurls a tapestry of personal empowerment amidst suffering.
I invite you to join me as we embark on an intimate exploration of suffering, its impermanence, and the remarkable strength that blossoms from embodying our experiences. Through the narrative of my own transformation and the insights gained from nature's cycles, we'll uncover how to navigate the emotional terrain that often imprisons us in sorrow and emerge with a heart filled with compassion.
In 5 simple steps this dialogue serves as an invitation to consider how the relationships we nurture can become vessels for healing, and how we can support one another in our collective quest for a life interwoven with love and meaningful connections. Join me, and let's traverse this transformative landscape together.
Please be aware that some practices can bring up deep fears and you may need to seek professional support. You can reach out to me if you need guidance.
Welcome. In this episode I am going to share with you a rewrite of an old blog post called Take Control of your Suffering. Suffering comes in many forms and is unique in each of our experiences. It is easy to hear Buddha's core tenet that all life is suffering. But to fully embody the compassion for this world, suffering is the path of an enlightened one who serves the world with unconditional love. Great masters endure immense suffering to demonstrate this to us as models of what we can each become. Are you ready to release your suffering?
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The day when my perspective on suffering shifted is etched vividly in my memory. Watching David Attenborough documentary on African wildlife, I witnessed the brutal cycle of life animals killing, starving and dying. The profound suffering in nature struck me deeply. However, what stood out more was the animals ability to rebound, shake off and revel in life's joy during peaceful moments. This was after my 25 years of depression and anxiety, with several suicidal ideation episodes and panic attacks. I was a suffering addict. My suffering belief was that I was alive. Life was for suffering, but this moment was an embodied shift in opening to Buddha's tenet. Step one acknowledging the University of Suffering.
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Suffering is an undeniable reality, a thread woven into the fabric of existence. Each of us bears our unique burdens, our personal lessons to learn During comparison between our suffering and that of others is an exercise in futility. Every individual is on their distinct path in comparisons that only feel judgment and the critical mind giving the ego undue control, indulging in the shadows of our own suffering whilst witnessing another in pain impedes our ability to be a genuine service. This includes stopping our ability to be empathetic, kind and helpful to another living being. Be free from judgment. Relinquish your fears. Accept suffering is just a part of existing. Breaking free from judgment is paramount. Shedding the weight of comparison and accepting suffering as an intrinsic part of existence is liberating. This involves relinquishing the grip of the ego, that part of ourselves that thrives on keeping us small and confined. Only by freeing ourselves from judgment can we extend authentic support to those navigating their own trials.
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Some people tell me that there is no need for forgiveness, only acceptance. Often these are high intellectuals. What they are hopping past is that they are in a human emotional body. Their minds judge and hold opinions. It is these opinions, beliefs and judgments that require forgiveness. If in doubt, say I forgive myself completely as a mantra. Do not consider what or why you forgive. Just know to do it and allow the changes to happen.
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Step 2 Suffering as a choice. Despite the hardships of human evolution and the struggles embedded in our history, modern day life, paradoxically, offers more time and freedom. Yet mental health challenges have surged. Buddha's wisdom, dating back over two and a half thousand years, asserted that suffering is a conscious choice, irrespective of the physical difficulties of life. Taking responsibility for our reactions to life events is key. Transforming how we experience life hinges on our choices, not on external circumstances and whether we get what we want. Ask yourself how am I choosing to experience this moment?
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Step 3 the impermanence of all things. Understanding that nothing is permanent and that we own nothing is a powerful realization. Recognizing that all things, including suffering and the lack of what we do not have, will pass. This brings us back to the present moment, the only moment that truly exists. Remind yourself, this too shall pass.
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Step 4. Ruminating in the past is a detour to healing. Depression resides in the past, anxiety in the future and happiness is what is here, in the present. While some therapeutic approaches delve into the past, revisiting and rehashing suffering, alternative methods emphasize healing through physical body and nervous system, and this is embodiment. Through embodiment, we invite you to experience the past in our body fully and allow it to move through the body into completion and there are often stages of completion, and this is the healing journey. Get embodied support. If therapy is your preference, look for practitioners that use embodied practices like EDMR or Gishton therapies. Or maybe take something like clarity breath work or somatic movement practices that start to make you feel safe to be in your body and experience these feelings.
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Step 5. Escape the victim mindset. A victim is a person who has come to feel helpless and passive in the face of misfortune and ill treatment. The key is the words. Come to feel. When we recognize that we control how we feel in each moment, then we can understand that emotions are our choice. This choice is what changes our lives, our karma. Suffering becomes a point of connection, a shared ground where compassion can flourish. However, dwelling in suffering with others through complaining, sharing opinions on how others could be better, instead of guiding and supporting and hearing another's pain, what allow individual paths to open and someone to follow their own intuitive wisdom. Take control of the belief that you have no control or power. Your power is your choice to perceive things differently and choose another feeling, what feels good In the right now and, lastly, walking your unique path.
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Each person's journey is distinct, guided by personal philosophies or frameworks, unlike the Buddhist Eightfold Path or the Law of Attraction.
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Whether you find solace in the simplicity of self-compassion or the structured guidance of a specific path, the choice is yours. My Illuminous Life Program is a transformative journey where clients discover positivity, calmness, presence and fulfillment. To explore whether or not the Illuminous Life Program aligns with your needs, you can book a 30-minute free call with me and we can discuss how and the ways in which you can come safely into your body and reconnect, to heal without distraction, to be with your suffering and to liberate yourself from it, being more compassionate and being able to hold others in a bigger, more loving space. The path to awakening, as Buddha envisaged in the Eightfold Path, begins when we release our suffering. Taking control and choosing ease in your life is the key to unlocking your true potential.
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This blog post was originally published on the 12th of April 2018. It has been updated with the growth of myself and experience of working with my clients. I look forward to connecting with you, for we heal when we are in relationship and I would love to guide you and hold you in this love that you already are.