#169: Yup, 69 plus 100 makes 170?

Remember the first time you heard about Hollywood's dark underbelly, and it felt like a splash of cold water on your dreams? Well, buckle up, because this episode of The Funky Panther doesn't just splash; it dunks you right into the deep end. We tear the curtain back on the harrowing truths revealed in "Quiet on the Set" and the scandals around P Diddy . With a mix of raw honesty and that irreverent humor you've come to love, we navigate the murky waters of fame, fortune, and the price paid behind the scenes.

Now, if you thought we'd just leave you in the lurch with those heavy hitters, think again! Shift gears and join us as we swap scandal for scandalous tales of our own—yep, we're talking about those clumsy, fumbling, and downright hilarious first forays into the world of sex and drugs. With stories of backseat rendezvous and misadventures with substances, we get up close and personal, sharing the kind of anecdotes that'll have you laughing, cringing, and maybe even learning a thing or two about life's wild ride.

To top it all off, we toss in a sprinkle of the bizarre and the speculative, musing over CERN's experiments during an upcoming eclipse—could they be shifting us to a different timeline? And you won't want to miss the peculiar discussion around the lives of conjoined twins and the complexities of their personal relationships. So come for the laughter, stay for the enlightenment, and don't forget to hit subscribe for a seat at the table with your pals Chad, Javier, and Tim. Because here at The Funky Panther, we're all about the unexpected twists in the tale.

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Transcript

Funky Panther Episode 169 Recap

Compter 0:00

This episode will dive into the documentary Quiet on the Set, as well as the current allegations against P Diddy. Some of the things we talk about may be triggering to some Listener's. Discretion is advised. Come on and do the hustle. Get up early in the morning Getting frosty with them gogurts. Brother Suck in that gogurt brother, let's go, let's gogurt here to call in. I had to do it to him. I had to do it to him. I had to do it to em. Yeah, I was the king of the house.

Javier 0:49

This bitch boy was like I'm so scared I don't know. I'm gonna mess it up. I'm like bro, shut the fuck up, You're gonna be great.

Compter 0:56

What are you doing? Shut the fuck up, fucking suck. Got the drug dealers, got the ball players. Gotta feed the vine, gotta see the guys. Read between the lines, child. I think that song was like.

Javier 1:17

Chipaka getting some head. Yeah, that sounds like that sounds like.

Chad 1:31

Tina, come get some ham.

Javier 1:35

Eat your food, stupid, come eat your food Tina Fucking affluent dynamite man.

Tim 1:39

I want to watch this so bad now it's me, pedro, in Mexico.

Chad 1:42

Oh hello everyone and welcome to the Funky Panther coming to you from Fort Worth, Texas. We have got a hell of a show for you. We're back, we're refreshed, we're good to go. Are you going to say we're rats? No, here on episode 169. So sit back, relax, try to enjoy. I'm Chad.

Javier 2:07

I'm Horny.

Chad 2:08

And I'm Tim.

Javier 2:11

And we are the.

Tim 2:12

Funky Panther.

Chad 2:12

No, I was not expecting that this is his third half beer Boy it feels so good, Feels so good baby.

Javier 2:18

Do you ever just get rock hard? Yeah, baby, literally all the time, every day, when I look in the mirror and I see the picture of Chad and I jack it, jacking it San. Francisco. Jacking it, jacking it, jacking it yeah.

Tim 2:33

So you got a picture of Chad on your mirror too. Yeah, don't you? Yeah, that's why I said two yeah.

Javier 2:39

And then I got the picture of you down at the bottom, the picture of you at the bottom. So whenever I'm about to finish, I don't like any of this. You had it clear here, folks. We are only 100 episodes taken back from our 69th episode and I remember it very clearly and vividly because it was in my little notebook.

Chad 3:01

It was nothing dirty, it was nothing perverted it was all all about Texas, which we'd already talked about.

Javier 3:06

On our first episode, like multiple episodes. Yeah, we were Texas boys through and through baby. Yeah, these flags don't run. I mean these colors, colors, did I say flags? Yeah, you said flags. That was close.

Chad 3:22

Very, very, very uh. We talked about the whole like uh porn debacle in Texas.

Javier 3:28

Do you still love?

Chad 3:29

Texas.

Javier 3:30

Um, that's a pretty, that's a pretty big setback. I.

Chad 3:32

I I'll tell you what it's.

Javier 3:33

It's like, um, you can't judge the state based on the decisions of few, like, especially people that can't walk.

Tim 3:41

Look, it was okay to take the women's rights and reproductive stuff, but you touched our porn you touched our pornography, sir, and I think that that's a tyrant policy.

Chad 3:52

They overstepped. They've made some huge mistakes. Now they've set up some real enemies. Yeah, they have.

Javier 3:58

But I will say this though I guess from yesterday we do have unbeaten records. Since that law went through, the bands went through. The Dallas Mavericks and the Dallas Stars haven't lost a game yet. All you heard of here, folks, is that time.

Tim 4:18

I don't know if you're ready for it, but we haven't had this in a long time, oh yeah.

Chad 4:23

If you need a download VPN to watch your sister and cousin get it on, you might be from Texas.

Tim 4:30

Now, that's.

Javier 4:30

Texas Now that's Texas, if you got to scurry along and hide some old 1990s pornography from your Republican father and you watch it with your buddies Now that's. Texas. Have we done that before? Have we done that?

Tim 4:50

If you've got to, find a guy to draw you something sexy.

Javier 4:57

Now, that's.

Javier 4:58

Texas.

Tim 4:58

That might just be Texas.

Javier 5:00

Have you seen the? That was good. Good call, Tim. Well done. I missed that segment.

Chad 5:02

We haven't brought that that's Texas in a while, because it's been a while. Have you seen the? Uh, that was good. Good call, tim.

Tim 5:04

Well done, I missed the we haven't brought that, that's texas, in a while, because it's been a while. Look, we have been on a topic with, uh, governor abbott for a long time old hot wheels himself, uh, wheels and steels are wheels of steels of glory. Yeah, um, and it's like I said it's been, it's been a minute right right now. We Now we've got Ken Paxton doing this man, fuck that bitch man, he's what caused that.

Javier 5:28

I wish I could box him. If I could box anybody, I would box Ken Paxton, because that motherfucker's got that lazy biggie eye. I'd punch the shit out of that and make that motherfucker look straight.

Tim 5:38

I would box. I think I'd box. No, I wouldn't box Abbott.

Javier 5:42

He's got that upper body strength no he doesn't, no, he don't Just knock him over, knock that motherfucker over.

Tim 5:46

I watched him at the border and he was I'm wheeling. Was he wheeling? It wasn't. Yeah, wheeling's been here.

Chad 5:53

Yeah, I don't know if I've ever actually watched him wheel.

Tim 5:59

I'm coming Mexicans myself on the border I'm just it's gotten.

Chad 6:03

It's gotten pretty rough. I don't want to get into it.

Javier 6:05

No, no, this isn't that episode, but it has gone.

Tim 6:07

It's getting wild. Yeah, it's getting wild. He might be, uh, he might be, the vice president, you know forrest whittaker hi dude. Uh, who's that other?

Javier 6:17

one a cab pad, dan patrick. Fuck that bitch too. I'm gonna slap that motherfucker in the mouth. How's he you correct in the group chat? How is he You're correct in the group chat. How is he still in position?

Chad 6:30

I don't know, but hopefully one day a horse knocks him over and bends him over and gives him a crawl in the old butthole.

Javier 6:33

A crawl A crawl in the old butthole.

Tim 6:37

All right, yeah, so I'm sorry. Hey, this is episode 169.

Sexual First Experiences and Regrets

Javier 6:45

Thank you again for joining us again. If you haven't joined us earlier, we did the first 30 already. Um, those episodes are exclusively on youtube, so go and check those out, get those numbers up and go ahead and subscribe if you're, uh, feeling randy. But also, um, thank you for joining us. We've been going at it for four years here in fort worth, texas for those that are listening the newer episodes. I mean, I know we got a couple guests that are coming on.

Tim 7:06

If you're not feeling, randy, you go ahead and delete us.

Chad 7:09

Yeah, go ahead and just delete us or not Like, just you know, keep us around. You don't know what's going to happen here.

Tim 7:14

Fuck, gerrymandering. Yes, if your name is not Randy, we don't want you here. I don't know what I'm saying, have? I don't know what I'm saying, have you?

Javier 7:21

ever met a Randy you liked I mean Randy, I think he always gave me free weed like freshman year.

Chad 7:26

Okay, that, randy was pretty cool.

Javier 7:27

Yeah, he gave me free drugs. I think he was just having to do that.

Javier 7:30

We got another friend who gave us free drugs. But he's got a family now and he's a good person.

Tim 7:34

I don't know any. That was the only Randy I knew Really.

Javier 7:40

Randy Travis.

Tim 7:42

Well.

Chad 7:43

Randy Chapman, you're proving me wrong. I know a bunch of Randys. It's Tracy.

Javier 7:47

Chapman, tracy Chapman, sorry, fuck, okay, so.

Tim 7:49

Randy Chapman's brother.

Chad 7:51

Her brother, tracy Chapman's a woman, so you know I bite her voice, don't assume. Okay, here we go.

Javier 7:58

So first I want to start off with an easy question. Easy question it's episode 69. Okay.

Chad 8:03

Did we establish that this is your episode? This is my.

Javier 8:05

I guess I didn't say it was but, if you want to chime in with the things I understand.

Javier 8:09

We've got a few things to talk about.

Chad 8:11

But just to break the ice. I want to break the ice.

Javier 8:14

This is your episode when did you lose your virginity? And I think, if you go back and listen to Robin's episode Quarks and Cowtown I don't know which episode it was give it a listen. It was a lot of fun, we had a great time with her and I hope she comes back someday.

Chad 8:30

I miss her. I miss her so much. I miss Robin man. She's a worse person now that she's happy you know what I mean.

Javier 8:36

I'm more upset that I haven't met the guy. I'm feeling kind of like left out.

Chad 8:40

Well, both of you fucked up by not going to the Valentine's event that we helped host. Yeah, well, yeah, I was recording with Lance that night. Either way, you fucked up. It was a great night. Yeah, I can't remember. And he was a nice guy. That's a handsome bastard, that one.

Javier 8:55

He's a very nice guy. He's a handsome man, we had a good time.

Javier 8:59

But listen to that episode. It was a lot of fun. So, of that episode, it was a lot of fun. So where'd you lose your virginity, guys? I know I lost mine near the field of a CC's Pizza over there on the.

Tim 9:07

I think it was over there by Discount Tire Behind a dumpster Some girl's house. I'm not gonna ask no, I mean, is it some girl's house Was? It terrible the first time no it was alright, it was pretty good actually.

Chad 9:25

How about you Chad? I mean, this is a little embarrassing, Okay.

Javier 9:28

Hey look, look, look, Open minds here, buddy.

Tim 9:30

In the back of a motherfucking Ford Ranger.

Javier 9:33

This is no judgment zone.

Chad 9:34

Okay, no judgment zone, no judgment zone. I'm still waiting for that first time.

Tim 9:39

I'm judging the shit out of you right now. What a fucking loser.

Chad 9:42

I'm still waiting. I'm still waiting for that special second I don't kiss until. It was in an apartment over there off of I guess it's Northridge and Hills area I don't know, Someone's place.

Javier 9:54

Okay, do you regret it? Do you wish you did it with someone else? For your first? I'm going to say yes, for mine, I'm going to say yes, for mine.

Chad 10:01

I'm going to say yes, yeah, only because.

Javier 10:03

I know that person doesn't listen, and if that person's brother knows that I did that, he would be very upset.

Tim 10:10

I don't regret it. No, no Good, it is what it is, and it makes you the person that you are today.

Javier 10:16

Makes you tough Leather skinned.

Tim 10:18

I'll tell you what, though I will say. The mother saw me leaving the house.

Javier 10:21

Oh, of course Nice, nice, nice.

Tim 10:24

And he came back with a mother. Yeah, super quiet garage door, though Okay.

Chad 10:29

Well done, Back then garage doors.

Javier 10:33

I don't remember who ever. Thank you, well-greased garage door.

Tim 10:35

Whoever made those garage doors. Thank you, craftsman.

Compter 10:38

Man, this beer's really good.

Chad 10:47

This was a trillium. Yeah, um I I, so I do not regret what, when, who, any of those things. The only thing I regret was saying no to two or three before, because I felt like it needed to save yourself it needed to be a special thing dude, and then it wasn't, and I regret everything.

Javier 10:59

I regret those. I regret those very much, because I even had someone that was like we're gonna, we're gonna shut the fuck up, tim, you and I. She's like we're you and I, we're gonna go get tested.

Javier 11:10

I'm gonna get on birth control.

Javier 11:11

We're gonna do it right, and I was like this seems like too many steps I'm like you do realize I'm a virgin. Right, there's way too many steps, but look, I respect it now. Looking back, I was a.

Tim 11:22

I was a kid yeah, I respect it now too many steps, but like I'm like I'm a fucking kid, you know.

Javier 11:29

I'm like, yeah, I'm a hormone rage teenager. I'm like let's get it over with. But now, looking back, I'm like you know what should have taken. My time should not have rushed it so the, the, the.

Tim 11:46

The real question, though, is yeah, ever have, though, is did anything ever happen while other people were in the room, though? What?

Javier 11:55

do you mean in the room Trying?

Tim 11:55

to keep it hush-hush. You don't want anybody watching, but you're going to get it on, and there's other people there.

Javier 11:59

I was in an open field, dude, I'm not talking about the first time.

Tim 12:03

I'm talking about Other times. Yeah, yeah, yeah, in an open field dude, I mean, I'm not talking.

Javier 12:06

I'm not talking about the first time, I'm talking about other times. Yeah, I've had. I've had it where I was in a room and people were outside the room they knew what we were doing um, and uh, somebody's walked in on me once, twice, three times. I love you, that's fucking crazy.

Chad 12:24

Okay, dude we need more breaks, yeah yeah, I know so much fun already. It's such a what was that?

Tim 12:31

what was that movie that? Uh, garden State, garden State, son of a bitch happy 20th anniversary.

Javier 12:36

Garden State. Um, no, yeah, uh. But at the time too, at those times I was drunk, like I wasn't drunk drunk, but I was like, and I was in high school, post high school, post, high school I didn't get drunk no, you sure didn't did you get really mad at somebody for smoking?

Tim 12:52

weed. Yeah, you got mad at me one time I got you did drugs and I got angry anyone that did drugs.

Javier 12:58

How dare you sir, look now, my boy here is like everyone involved. Mr snorts a lot. Not at all true, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Let the record show if you test it right now he's not gonna test negative for cocaine and barbiturates quaaludes though quaaludes that motherfucker my boy's a quaalude hawk

Tim 13:20

I want to know where you found quaaludes in this market.

Javier 13:22

It's 19, or it's 2024. Quaaludes have been outlawed for like 30 years, 40 years.

Chad 13:28

Listen, saresh and I started watching Entourage. She's never seen it and I've been wanting to like watch it again, and so I've never seen it.

Javier 13:35

It's such a good show, oh my.

Chad 13:36

God, it's bringing back so much memories because you and I, we used to always talk about the fucking time. Like we like idolize that show immensely lloyd so good. But uh, ari was talking about like quaaludes. He's like I haven't done that since. I popped four quaaludes, blah, blah, blah. I was like, oh shit, such a good show have you uh?

Tim 13:53

have you seen uh casey rocket yet on? Kill tony no so he's a he's kind of a prop comet. But he comes in and like he's just all over place and at first I didn't like him. I've really started liking him now.

Javier 14:06

Dude. The people that go on Kill Tony. Some of them are hit or miss. I still haven't.

Tim 14:11

I don't know what this is. I'll send you some.

Javier 14:12

There's one that I followed. I'm like ooh, she has an.

Tim 14:14

OnlyFans, but some of them are hit or miss. But talking about Quaaludes he was. Yeah, I got to get out of here. My buddy found four original oxys in his attic. We're going to go get perked out or whatever and watch something, but he just says random stuff. So you talk about the Quaaludes and me talk about the Quaaludes. Just popped him in my head, you'll get more. It's like a bag full of goodies.

Chad 14:40

All right, I guess let's start with the green first we did have this one a long time ago yeah this was also from treehouse, yeah um on the group chat.

Javier 14:48

My sister says y'all signed on red ribbon, week signed on red ribbon. Well, you know they make you uh back in the day, when you were doing like all that dare shit that made you sign uh like a contract that you wouldn't do drugs. Do you feel?

Tim 15:02

no, I don't remember signing anything, and I was one of those kids that had my lawyer look at it fucking.

Chad 15:08

I know, you know you had all the good toys I'm like your family had money to have a lawyer to check your fucking dare contract. I did not have all the good toys.

Javier 15:15

Yeah, you did, I had all be careful please, because I'm very like right over the laptop.

Javier 15:19

Yeah, no, she's gonna fry this fucking episode.

Tim 15:22

Um, yeah, no that's why it's over here.

Javier 15:24

It's how about like, I know we're in relationships now, but like, had y'all ever like been on a substance and had sex? Like, have y'all had like sex on, like edibles or like you know anything like that?

Tim 15:38

they do say that it intensifies the feeling no, man like I don't know no no, when you're, when you're, uh, when you're that far gone in my youth your dick don't work. Yeah, well, I mean it worked, but it's just like goes. Listen, I'm not, I'm not saying this from experience, I'm just gonna say it goes forever. I'm a drug freak. I didn't do it just like want to but it is absolutely better it is I did not. You're out of your fucking mind.

Chad 16:03

I didn't enjoy it well it's because you don't know what you're talking about and you're some kind of fool. I got tired man.

Javier 16:09

I will say when I was in Terlingua you just kept going. When I was in Terlingua we had it's like when is this going to stop? Acid.

Tim 16:26

I think we were great, it was amazing under the star. Oh my god, it was under the stars. I don't know man, I don't know, I don't know. So cute you start thinking about psychedelics and like that just seems, uh, like I don't know man things get real weird.

Chad 16:35

Yeah you would. I would assume you know that mushrooms would be great as well.

Javier 16:39

I don't know, no mushrooms, because we did I think we did shrooms one night and then mushrooms the other.

Tim 16:44

The same thing. You said shrooms and then mushrooms. Not that I I mean, sorry shrooms and acid Acid and shrooms.

Chad 16:48

Sorry, ever partake, I don't know, I don't know Right.

Javier 16:52

But the feeling is great. I mean, even whenever you're on an edible like it feels pretty good.

Chad 17:05

Yeah, I add stuff like uh, I was gonna say quaaludes, I thought you're gonna say ketamine.

Javier 17:07

I was like this is getting weird.

Tim 17:08

You take that special k baby um.

Javier 17:10

You know, I prefer to do my my love making on pcp you ever done it on fucking crystal, jesus christ, oh my god, this is a good turn holy shit, um, but I think, I think that, uh, whenever you either, if it's with food, you're not even drugs Like oysters, when you have oysters and caviar.

Tim 17:30

I don't feel like. I think the food stuff, the aphrodisiac stuff, I think that's bullshit.

Javier 17:34

Yeah, you think so yeah.

Javier 17:35

Because I've ate a shit ton of oysters and never got horny, I think you're doing it the wrong way, though I don't think you're doing an essential content or con. Use your word. I've never conned anybody. I've never conned anybody.

Tim 17:49

I don't know what you're doing.

Javier 17:51

I can't help you if I don't know what you're doing.

Javier 17:52

An essential context yes so the last.

Tim 17:55

Well, I mean eating oysters. I mean, I'm just downing them, like you know.

Javier 17:58

Like a goblin yeah.

Chad 18:01

So what food does it for you, timothy? No food. What food does it for you? No food does it for me you mean that glizzy day with the boys or we got going for you the day that your boys all got sick. That didn't do it for you.

Tim 18:13

I'm still saying you had a dozen glizzies thrown at your face. I'm still saying milky did it. I'm still saying he got a sick. I think he was like yeah, I just got over covid, I think is you think?

Chad 18:23

I think that because you've said this multiple times. I think that's why he doesn't hit us up on social media anymore. I think he hates us now. I don't know. Gladys doesn't think that you know Milky does he's like talked to us before?

Javier 18:37

Not in a while? Yes, he has Not in a while. Yes, he has, I don't know Even whenever I've seen him out like him or washed up like they're really cordial Sarasol, I wish that Milky had picked a better soccer team.

Chad 18:51

No, he picked the right team. Yeah, so they beat Always, no, always, no food. No food gets me no you lost.

Tim 19:00

It makes me sleepy. Food makes me sleepy.

Chad 19:02

What about like chocolate covered strawberries? It makes me sleepy, food makes me sleepy. What about like chocolate?

Javier 19:06

covered strawberries. It makes me sleepy, jesus Christ. How about like wax? Ear poured hot wax? That's not food, it is, if you believe it, baby.

Tim 19:13

That just sounds painful.

Chad 19:15

Yeah, oh, sarah saw Washed Up and I think he's a rookie now.

Compter 19:22

I don't think he's washed up anymore, he's just rookie.

Javier 19:24

Gladys, can you confirm?

Javier 19:26

Confirm, gladys, please.

Chad 19:28

Over at Dreyse the other day because while I was out of town, oh really. Yeah, rookie was performing at a thing and Sirish popped up. I saw a little video of that. Okay you do cool shit when I'm out of town. Real cool.

Javier 19:39

Yeah, she said rookie had rookies working at, also working at, uh gusto yeah, I saw him at gusto's.

Chad 19:43

Last time I was there, I still haven't been and I've been wanting to go, so I can't wait, I guess we go saturday?

Hollywood Child Actor Dark Truth

Javier 19:47

yeah, we're going saturday, I'm stoked, I'm stoked on the group chat. They they've been busy, but but no, they most definitely don't hate you oh that's good to know um love them both. So okay, aside from like sex and stuff like that. Okay, moving on, moving on. Have you guys seen the documentary on HBO? Quiet on the Set? No, no, no, you can't do that. You can't do that.

Tim 20:11

I just did this is not, but you said actually that was more for like your segue that you just did.

Javier 20:17

Yes.

Tim 20:18

Because what the fuck kind of segue is that let's stop talking about sex and let's go to fucked up shit.

Javier 20:24

Yeah.

Chad 20:24

Okay, so the big news, that's the big news.

Tim 20:27

Yeah, I did.

Chad 20:28

Y'all kind of prompted me with we were going to talk about this, and so I did watch two episodes on the train today, and it's pretty fucked up.

Tim 20:39

It is really fucked up. It makes you wonder about like what other? Because now I want to like, OK, Nickelodeon's one thing. I want to see Disney Channel. Yeah, oh yeah.

Chad 20:48

You know there's two big fucked up things. I was thinking about that. There's two big fucked up things like that is just outside of my brainwave, like I don't understand how this can happen, is the whole thing with Epstein Diddy, all the shit and the kids stuff. I just don't understand. I don't fucking get how fucked up these people can be.

Tim 21:08

It's so bizarre to me.

Chad 21:10

And then two where the fuck are these parents at? I know I'm not a parent, but what the fuck are they doing?

Tim 21:17

Watch more of that. Watch more, yeah, watch more, you'll get some information on that.

Javier 21:21

Man, really the adults are also to blame too. You'll get some information on that. Man really, the adults are also to blame too. I mean the one with Josh Drake.

Tim 21:27

Drake and.

Javier 21:27

Josh Drake Bell. That one was really sad.

Tim 21:30

Yeah, let's not. I don't want to spoil anything for you.

Chad 21:32

No spoilers, right, I mean I don't know if that's necessarily a spoiler, but you know.

Javier 21:37

But I will say this, and it sucks to say, I will say this right now. It sucks to say You'll get there whenever you get there. I'm going to spoil something for you, that's fine. But the thing that hurt me the most as a child of the 90s growing up watching TV, was the guy that f***ed Drake Bell.

Javier 21:56

Sorry, this is trigger warning.

Tim 21:58

Oh yeah, yeah, Jesus, you said a hard, yeah.

Javier 22:01

You said a hard yeah Is the fact that 41 actors wrote letters of what did they call?

Tim 23:08

it. They wrote basically like this is out of his character, this is not him, this is not like it was basically like character witnesses.

Javier 23:16

Yeah, character witnesses, they wrote letters. The person that did it, the person, the rapist, it's basically the same.

Tim 23:20

it's the same thing that Ashton Kutcher and Mila.

Javier 23:23

Kunis did for Danny Masterson. Oh person the rapist. It's basically the same. It's the same thing that ashton kutcher and um, so two of those were uh, writer strong and will friedel from boy meets world hold on, you're right.

Chad 23:32

What a fucking segue. This got dark real quick.

Javier 23:35

You, this was just this yeah, I mean, this isn't a part of the whole 69 madness, but like that was that was the most heartbreaking of all, and it and the thing also too, god damn it.

Chad 23:47

You did say 69 madness, like what do?

Javier 23:49

you expect, but um, I listened to the boy meets world podcast and a couple weeks ago like they had an episode where they talked about the guy yeah, and how they were like. Well, whenever we found, you know, we had no idea and we didn't know the context, and then, whenever the episode came out, they're like 41 actors had character statements that they wrote to the judge.

Tim 24:12

It makes you wonder, like, how much did they actually know, right, look, did they know everything at that point?

Javier 24:17

One of the other ones that surprised me was James Marsden, oh yeah, which I was like what the fuck Like? And you know they had videos of, uh, that guy with leonardo dicaprio and it makes you think like, did he do something with leo also, you know the world will never know but but it's like that whole um him and then like the harvey weinstein yeah, yeah all these people like right in power, right, go watch it, watch that show.

Famous Child Stars and Hollywood Scandals

Tim 24:43

Uh, it's, it's, it's crazy. Um, you start kind of getting the nitty-gritty of like the hollywood child. It makes you like glad, like I used to want to be like a oh, yeah, we all did.

Chad 24:53

Yeah, I want to idolize the people and all that. Like kel was my dude dude. You know what I mean? Well, I'm just I'm.

Tim 24:58

I'm even thinking like um macaulay colkin man watching home alone like, oh, I want to be just like him well, I mean, that's why you didn't see him past like the age of, yeah, 15.

Javier 25:09

You know he was done with it. It's crazy, but, um, yeah, no, it's. It's really insane, like uh, everything that all those child actors went through. You feel more. You feel really sad for amanda bines also, because man, that was just that yeah especially right now, going and looking at her stuff. Have you been watching her stuff lately? Yeah and uh she's even talked about. She's admitted that. You know she's going through a bunch of stuff and well, she's uh quit drinking.

Tim 25:37

Yeah, she's gonna be a um nail tech. Yeah she's going now tech school, she's gonna get her state certification, which is crazy. You might show up and get your nails done by Amanda Bynes.

Chad 25:47

Who is one of the most famous child stars of our time. Dude, I loved her. I had the biggest crush on her.

Javier 25:52

Same we all did I mean it's crazy.

Tim 25:55

What was that soccer movie? She's All that, she's All that. Oh, I loved that movie.

Javier 25:59

I watched it the other day, but now watching this stuff and you're looking and you're just like holy fuck. You're during this stuff.

Javier 26:08

You're going through it.

Javier 26:10

But yeah, on the group chat about Jeanette McCurdy's book. Very good book. It's called I'm Glad my Mom's Dead. Very good book.

Chad 26:22

Who's Jeanette McCurdy?

Javier 26:27

She was on iCarly, okay, and uh, it's very eye-opening about the business because she was also offered like uh, I think it was like a hundred thousand dollars to like keep her mouth shut about like Dan, well, that was.

Tim 26:35

The other thing is like um, was it Drake that? Would Drake Bell that was his wife's leaving him, or no, josh, josh's wife left him because she found out he got paid off did no really I believe that fact. Check me, but I I believe I read something like that and that was kind of like the catalyst was was that he got paid off, he took a payout and not say anything but like I mean, dude it's, it's great.

Javier 27:00

I mean like you don't think about that, she's all that earlier.

Chad 27:03

Yeah, it's not, she's the man, she's the man she's all.

Javier 27:05

That's the one with uh, freddie prince jr, yeah thanks, yeah, fucking shit man, I was like hold on.

Chad 27:12

That looks more right than what y'all said.

Tim 27:14

The man, because she played him she dressed like a boy, yeah with uh what's his face?

Javier 27:18

uh, channing tatum, yeah yeah, I love channing Tatum. Of course everyone does Her body's sexy baby. Okay, yeah, melissa Joan Hart also had come out too, because I forgot where I saw that. Was it the same? Was it the same?

Javier 27:32

It was an.

Tim 27:32

E True Hollywood thing about TGIF.

Javier 27:34

That's why I saw that also.

Tim 27:36

Oh, there's a whole thing about TGIF now. Yeah, oh, she'll be the child star, yeah.

Chad 27:44

And what do y'all think? Do you think that this? You know, looking at everything that happens, obviously it comes out from like Hollywood and the music industry and all these different things, because there's a big spotlight on it, even if it's years later, right, because they've got money and they've got power and they can do what the fuck they want. But obviously this is not like an isolated thing.

Tim 28:04

Like people of power do shitty fucking things, right, yeah, yeah, yeah, shitty people do shitty things.

Chad 28:09

So that's something else that's kind of scary to think about is like how much this shit fucking like really happens.

Tim 28:14

Well, I mean, like you know, epstein took a long, long nap and never woke up.

Javier 28:26

And so it makes you wonder, like, like the whole pd thing, right, I want to go to the island I want to go.

Tim 28:30

I want to go. Pd apparently had his own little personal, you know, you know well, he had his own little personal island at his, at his mansions, you know, and um pd's definitely murdered, though, right yeah of is he is murdered? I don't think he, I don't think he has had murders.

Chad 28:47

It's diddy.

Javier 28:48

He caused a murder oh yeah you don't fuck with diddy, yeah you well, there's a whole thing.

Tim 28:52

They were talking about um with the tupac thing, right? Yeah so there's tupac goes to jail. He ends up writing that uh diss track, basically dissing. You know the east coast rap game and all that. Uh p diddy shows up in what uh in california and crips and bloods are around and they both hate p diddy or something along those lines, all I know is you got to check in whenever you go to la but he got to check in and you know you got to check.

Tim 29:22

But he talked to kvd and and pd called the murder yeah he had to have yeah, um no, but all the stuff that's coming out with pd now pd, pd now he I mean they raided his mansions yeah, arrested two of his kids. He fled to freaking like some caribbean island. Yeah and yeah. Did you know he adopted some white girl?

Chad 29:42

no, yeah it's weird, is it the?

Javier 29:45

girl who sang uh, uh, what's that fucking? I'll figure it out. I'll play the song here in a bit, but I literally know nothing about p diddy.

Chad 29:53

So puff diddy combs, puff diddy papa p diddy ever since he had bad boys for life and that was the last song that I feel like he was ever relevant.

Tim 30:03

Yeah, p Diddy is now. He's basically the Jeffrey Epstein of the rap.

Chad 30:08

world Of music. Yeah, I mean I've kind of I've not really kept up with everything that's going on. They're saying that he had cameras.

Tim 30:14

He had cameras in every single room of his house. Well, that's what they were searching for. It's like video, right, right. And they've had all these people come in a neighbor. As, as the neighbor was leaving, he was like, yeah, he's had buses show up with like underage kids like getting. I don't know if that's true, but like the mom.

Javier 30:32

The guy's mom came out. It's like okay, he's just lying.

Chad 30:36

Okay, all right from the chat from our experts, he didn't make it to the island.

Tim 30:40

He is currently in florida oh, so he made it to florida. Yeah, thank you experts. Yeah, they were saying he like you, like you, just try to disappear also, he was apparently all about the benjamins.

Chad 30:51

Is that true? Is this true?

Tim 30:52

I believe he was all about the benjamins and I think that might got him in trouble because I think they're throwing like sex trafficking and all sorts of stuff out on them right now but also they're saying that I'm talking about look, look and all sorts of stuff out on them right now.

Chad 31:11

Also, they're saying that this is the song I'm talking about Look, look yeah no, that's a white girl.

Javier 31:23

It's just really funny. It's so funny, it's a funny video. He has adopted that person.

Tim 31:28

Yeah, he adopted some white girl, not her. I was just like no, no, no, no, no no, no, no, I was like what the fuck is happening.

Javier 31:36

It's like what'd their mouth do? It don't rap, I know that, but that's funny. That's a funny. No, but the whole thing is just a funny joke. Uh, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, um, but I'd also compare him to ed the azure guy. Yeah, azure miller too. I mean, he was uh secretly written out of uh invincible. You watch invincible on prime tv, yeah uh, he was, he's one of the bad guys on there and they like changed actors.

Javier 32:00

Azure miller was a part of that and they took him out. He's the guy that turns people into cyborgs.

Chad 32:13

What else?

Javier 32:14

mmm oh.

Tim 32:19

He was, oh, the flash guy. Yeah, the flash guy. Yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. So like did? He had stuff to do like with Justin Bieber, um several other musicians and stuff, and there's allegations that basically did he found bieber right, wasn't what I thought it was usher was usher.

Tim 32:30

Well, did he and usher and? But there's allegations coming out like saying that did he? Basically has told other, like artists that are trying to come up like I'm gonna have sex with you, basically, because that's what this is, what guys do oh, uh r kelly had one too.

Javier 32:46

I think it was called Pee on you.

Tim 32:48

He did.

Javier 32:48

I'm going to piss on it.

Javier 32:50

Yeah.

Tim 32:51

Drip, drip, drip pee on you. So my question is when does Diddy die?

Javier 32:57

Because Epstein killed himself in prison. Right.

Tim 32:59

He's not. Do you think Diddy's going to go to prison, daddy?

Chad 33:03

Diddy's going to get it, he got.

Javier 33:04

U2? Oh no, I think it's kind of with the rich and powerful. I mean, look, he sold all of his stocks. I mean, fuck Epstein was rich and powerful.

Tim 33:13

Epstein had a shit ton of money.

Javier 33:14

But I mean he had more skulls in the bottom closet floor Opposed to the top closet floor.

Chad 33:24

As opposed to P Diddy, because P Diddy's killed people.

Javier 33:28

No, ep, the top, closet floor, as opposed to pd, because pd's killed people no epstein has more like political connects. There's two types of gangsters. Those types of gangsters like that are involved in politics.

Tim 33:35

They're way more dangerous than like no, but I mean, do you think they're gonna get diddy for like racketeering and all that stuff?

Javier 33:40

yeah, absolutely. I mean I think he's gonna serve, he's gonna get recode, obviously I think he'll.

Tim 33:44

Rico'd. I think he'll serve time. I believe that he is now. I mean, he wasn't really relevant.

Javier 33:51

I'm going to get the repo. Rico get the repo the vehicle.

Javier 33:55

Would you say he was relevant now?

Javier 33:57

Did he?

Compter 33:58

Yeah, fuck yeah.

Javier 33:59

No, how Dude he Ciroc music. I mean bad boy. No one drinks Ciroc anymore. I drink Ciroc.

Chad 34:06

No, you don't. I drink Ciroc baby. I guarantee we don't even have Ciroc up there, We've got like 30 hours of Ciroc.

Javier 34:13

Dude, I still listen to like a bunch of bad boy shit.

Tim 34:15

But I mean, I'm asking like in today's time, right now, is P Diddy still relevant?

Javier 34:27

Because I hadn't really heard anything in the news other than all of a sudden he's jeffrey epstein in the rap world. Agreed, agreed on the group chat rico in court, suave in prison. That was really good.

Chad 34:35

That was good last time I I even remember seeing diddy was last time I watched that jonah hill movie uh, oh, um, yeah, yeah, yeah, uh get him to the greek, get him to the greek yeah, so that there's a scene where diddy's over there sitting there like I got 12 kookaroos.

Tim 34:50

No, he's talking about mind fucking them. Oh yeah, Didn't age well.

Javier 34:53

No.

Tim 34:53

Yeah, didn't age well at all.

Javier 34:55

All that stuff. No, it's like we kind of grew up in that era with him. You know he had the shows on MTV, he had Making the Band. He still had hits.

Chad 35:07

That's not what Tim's asking. He's asking, is he?

Tim 35:10

relevant now. Relevant now, right. Not really, that's what I'm saying, it's kind of like 50 Cent.

Javier 35:15

the same thing too. Do we listen to 50 Cent's music?

Tim 35:17

Yes, I'm going to tell you he's relevant right now. He is.

Javier 35:27

Have you been following his Instagram? Instagram, oh, because of diddy, oh dude, he is talking so much. Mama is also involved in all that stuff. With what did he uh-huh? His baby mama's?

Coverall Sizing and Musical Preferences

Javier 35:30

involved in all that and his baby mama I feel so disrespectful saying baby mama, but like I don't know her name, um, but the mother of his child, uh, is like uh saying that. Oh yeah, well, 50 did the same shit. He did the same shit with me. So it's kind of like you. You know one for the other, but you know 50 isn't known for music anymore. It's about like the shows he makes, like Power, and like the books, the other shows that he makes.

Tim 35:58

So ever since this has been so, ever since this whole stuff came out with Diddy, 50 Cent's been just shit posting.

Javier 36:08

He's fucking funny, though Dude it is, it is, he's a funny motherfucker.

Chad 36:12

Wasn't it 50 that bought the tickets and the?

Javier 36:15

five rows right.

Javier 36:16

He's so petty. He bought, like the first, like five rows of Ja Rule's concert. Yeah, he's hilarious, that is not the whole city.

Chad 36:24

That is a very small specific section of the city.

Javier 36:28

It's called Diddy's House.

Tim 36:32

Yeah, fitty said, just he posted that stand-up?

Chad 36:36

Who's the guy that did the stand-up?

Javier 36:37

Oh, it was he's funny as shit though. Fuck, he just did something with Meek Mill. He made fun of Meek Mill. God damn it. Herbie, help me out.

Tim 36:46

Yeah, I can't remember the guy's name.

Javier 36:48

He's got a really nice haircut.

Tim 36:52

Yeah, I can't remember his name.

Compter 36:54

Hey yo. Right now, though, for real, I need to know who fucks with me. You know, like just straight up, like I don't have the time. You know. If you fuck with me, let had the time. You know. If you fuck with me, let it be known, because I'm going to this next era and I'm lining up all the allies. If you fuck with me, let it be known. If you don't fuck with me, be quiet and I will take your silence as you don't fuck with me, you know I'm saying it's all love.

Javier 37:19

Also let it be known because big dick, uh, kanye west has come out and also talk shit to diddy like he's like. Ha ha ha, motherfucker, like you know, look what you're doing. Ha ha, you a diddler. And uh, yeah, on the group chat, andrew schultz, he's the one that was uh with those comments uh, shout out to andrew schultz, but it's, it's fucking crazy what happened I'm

Tim 37:41

sorry are you?

Chad 37:41

reading my name, I'm reading your name and I know it says javi, but it, what does it look like to you, kind of Hang on, javi, can you move? Just get a good glance. I thought his shirt said fart, doesn't it not?

Tim 37:57

kind of look like fart Law something.

Chad 38:01

Kind of looks like fart. I'll go up here.

Tim 38:03

I'll go up here, get it in the screen there Get it from the chat.

Chad 38:05

Anyone else think that might look a little like fart?

Tim 38:08

So I'm glad your coveralls fit. I'm glad your coveralls fit, so Visit Fort Worth whenever I bought them at the annual meeting the first coverall. They handed me a woman's coverall apparently Okay, it happens.

Tim 38:21

So the extra large. Or I bought a large Was it large, yeah. Or I bought a large, was it large, yeah. No, xl, it was an XL, yeah. Really tight in the crotch area, showing whole hog whenever I wear it, but other than that it's okay. I have a hard time getting it over the shoulders, though, so I bought the 2XL Right. That came in a men's size Too big.

Tim 38:43

And I'm swimming in it. Swimming in it, it's just so big, so I don't know what I'm going to do. Yeah, I don't know what to do.

Chad 38:50

I just I'll be honest with you, I don't have the body for a bodysuit.

Tim 38:59

You do Look, no, no, no, that's an excuse.

Chad 39:01

All right that. Watch it down to my knees. I want to go. It is so far further down than it needs to be.

Tim 39:06

Yeah, it's fun though.

Chad 39:08

How is that fun?

Tim 39:09

You have more movement and range of motion.

Chad 39:11

You don't, though Everybody says, because your waist is in your thigh, but you have people who say that, oh, I don't have the body for that.

Tim 39:18

Everybody has the body for anything they want to wear. Okay, you just have to see you wear. I'll wear mine, and you wear yours.

Chad 39:27

Listen, I love the shirt. You have this right, you have this. I bought that and the shirt.

Tim 39:31

I like the shirt. We're going to go out on the town and I'll wear my extra large.

Chad 39:34

XXL and some black pants.

Javier 39:36

No, don't do that you got to go with us.

Tim 39:41

This is you know, Do you?

Javier 39:42

think we can take it up.

Tim 39:43

I can, I need to.

Chad 39:45

I mean, if I could take the crotch in on everything that I own, that'd be great. It's just I have too much crotch. You know I don't need that much crotch.

Javier 39:52

I didn't know that was a problem.

Chad 39:56

I just need all my pants just taken in at the crotch, at the crotch, the crotchal region, whereas I need mine let out.

Javier 40:03

It's really hot in here, See look how far down yours are.

Chad 40:07

See, I'm not the only one no, let it down. Look how far that's like mid-thigh Chad. They're coveralls.

Javier 40:14

That is mid-thigh crotch. Are they supposed to be like up to?

Tim 40:17

here? Yeah, like pants A little bit. Are you supposed to?

Javier 40:20

see the outline of my dick on this.

Tim 40:21

I'm hoping, hoping you're supposed to have room when you sit down.

Chad 40:24

That doesn't just like you know, I just don't like. But yeah, so you pull them up like that. Yeah, so hold on, let let them down, stand up, jiggle a little bit and then sit down as you are now. Yeah, see, you look like you have a dress on. That's what I'm talking about. That's what I don't want. I've got a pair at least it's not me, I've got a pair of just me no, no, no, it's it least it's not just me.

Tim 40:46

No, no, no, unless you get the women's size and then I can confirm that it does stay right where you want it, I guess Maybe that's what I should have gone with. Yeah, it fits good in the arms, though. The women's yeah, they're kind of up. Yeah, I feel like the what is it? The shoulder, the greasers, the guys from like the-. Oh, yeah, you roll up your sleeves or whatever.

Chad 41:10

Yeah, Most guy's sleeves are just too big.

Tim 41:15

What's that musical Gay the musical you like.

Javier 41:21

I'm so sorry. I was trying to say something, but then it just came out as gay.

Chad 41:26

The musical you like. It's a musical, so like can we just all agree? The musical you like.

Javier 41:31

Once. Once is the only musical I like.

Tim 41:33

It's with the Jets.

Javier 41:35

When you're a Jet. You're a Jet all the way From your first cigarette to your last iron day. West Side Story the fact that he show tunes everybody. Fuck yeah, bitch Show tunes, motherfucker.

Sex Positions and Memories

Tim 41:47

I don't fuck around, but yeah, you had that kind of like that, or the other one with John Travolta Grease hey, I'm going to talk about the R-word, because that's what I do.

Javier 41:59

That's what he was.

Javier 42:00

What's that song You're?

Javier 42:01

the one that I want? No, what's no, no, no. Where's the one that was like really rapey?

Chad 42:08

I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you.

Tim 42:11

Christy helped. That was the song. Yeah, what's the song I'm going to get you?

Javier 42:18

It was also a P Diddy tune, by the way. So let's change gears. This is really. I know we got into deeper stuff, but what's?

Chad 42:29

your favorite sex position, man, your segues on episode 169 are just impeccable, yeah very.

Javier 42:37

I appreciate it. Cheers to your segues. Thank you, I appreciate that. Thank you so much I don't know.

Tim 42:45

Timothy, you start. I don't know, man, I don't think I have like a.

Javier 42:53

I mean, I think the, the favorites, always like honestly, I'm just grateful to be there. Yeah, I think that's I'm just glad to be here a second. I'm just glad to be here, guys, if I'm, if I'm being real.

Tim 43:01

Just you know, my favorite position is just in the room. Yeah, just glad to be there. Guys, just thankful that things are happening. Can't complain about that. Good for you, man, can't complain about that Chad.

Javier 43:19

what about you? What's your favorite sexual position?

Chad 43:22

I don't like these questions. Well, you know it's episode 69. I'm pretty sure my parents listen now.

Javier 43:26

That's fine, I don't want to do Well, you know it's episode 6 today. I'm pretty sure my parents listen now. That's fine.

Chad 43:30

I don't want to do this shit, hey.

Javier 43:31

Carolyn, listen to what they're talking about.

Tim 43:35

Carolyn's going to bring it up. Oh, reverse cowgirl.

Javier 43:38

He said reverse cowgirl I didn't say anything.

Tim 43:40

Okay, that one's okay.

Javier 43:41

That one, yeah, depends on if you can do it or not.

Chad 43:46

What do you mean? Do it.

Javier 43:48

I don't know, I've never really tried reverse cowgirl Okay.

Tim 43:53

That's one I've never tried.

Javier 43:55

Yeah, have I, so I just watched Chad does a Dougie in bed.

Chad 44:02

To me it was a good time.

Tim 44:03

That's her favorite position is my Dougie, the third or fourth time I watched not national lampoons, uh the national american american pie presents the book of love oh god.

Javier 44:14

The presents the series of american pie movies. I actually, yeah, there's, there's several of them, yeah, like, uh, the naked mile.

Tim 44:20

The naked mile is pretty good. Yeah, uh, book of love. I actually I like the book of love.

Chad 44:23

I thought it was pretty funny what is this like a national lampoon type thing.

Tim 44:26

Exactly that's what. That is exactly what they all have eugene levy.

Javier 44:30

Yeah, they all do. That is the and the eyebrows themselves, yeah uh.

Tim 44:35

The book of love, though, is nice. Um I I wish there was a book left for us when we were in high school there was.

Chad 44:43

I don't know if y'all remember this, but when we would go downtown back in the day that we we weren't able to drink, we didn't go to bars. What we would do is go grab ourselves a coffee at the starbucks in the barnes and noble and go cheesecake factory yeah uh, yeah it was still there too, when yeah, and then the barnes and noble was h&m and now it's abandoned again. Yeah, but we went to barnes and noble to you.

Javier 45:05

What's your name?

Tim 45:06

No, h&m was Billy Miners.

Javier 45:09

No.

Tim 45:10

No, no, billy Miners was further.

Chad 45:14

Yeah, billy Miners is a clothing shop. I think it's a woman's only clothing shop.

Javier 45:17

I think it's Ann Taylor. I think it's an Ann Taylor.

Chad 45:19

now I don't know what the fuck any of those are. Okay, so we would go to Barnes Noble, we would go and get a coffee, we would go straight upstairs. I think there was an escalator.

Tim 45:27

You'd go up the escalator, Escalator yeah.

Chad 45:29

And then you'd kind of like creep in that back corner.

Tim 45:32

And find you a book.

Javier 45:33

All of the like Playboys and stuff like that.

Chad 45:36

There wasn't Playboys at fucking Barnes Noble.

Javier 45:38

I mean, there was one at the what Barnes Noble were station dude, it was a gas stations had playboy. Yeah, I still have the first one I bought when I worked at mexican inn. Uh, the gas station across the street next to little germany, the old little germany, I still have the first playboy I bought. You go for, you went for a playboy I did.

Tim 45:56

I was like 16 years old, straight up hustler. No, the barnes and noble had all the books.

Chad 46:01

They had all the sex position books, oh yeah lane bryant Elaine.

Javier 46:05

Bryant. What were they called? Kama Sutra Kama?

Chad 46:07

Sutra, but like different variations of it. Oh, all these different sex books yes, they had all the really weird ones, like weird situations that people have found themselves into, and like story-ridden books.

Javier 46:18

Oh yeah, yeah, it was like a whole section about sex. I dated somebody in high school and I bought the book and like hey, look what I got. But she was a virgin and we never did any of that shit.

Chad 46:28

So that didn't go well. Huh, that did not go well. Did she break up with you after that?

Javier 46:31

too. I mean I had a couple breakups, but I would 100% break up with you if you brought that book out and was just like-.

Tim 46:39

What the fuck you want me.

Javier 46:42

You're an adult hey, no, and all they wanted was the reverse cowgirl.

Chad 46:46

You know what I mean. That's all they wanted.

Javier 46:47

That's all they wanted. I'm going to go through a list of the top five. I guess it's on ChatGPT. So number five is standing, I guess a standing position. These are the top five sex positions According to ChatGPT. One partner stands while the other either stands and reps you got to use co-pilot man Reps Nah, co-pilot sucks.

Javier 47:05

Their legs around the partner or is held up. This position requires strength and stamina, but can add an element of excitement and novelty. It is okay. It is ideal for a quick, passionate encounter. I prefer novelty and can be highly arousing due to its somewhat challenging nature. Okay, that's number five. Number four spooning.

Tim 47:28

Spooning in a sexual position.

Chad 47:29

Yes, or is it more of just a? It's not, it is.

Tim 47:31

It is.

Javier 47:32

It's like a side sex thing. Yes, it is.

Javier 47:34

Oh yeah it's very Okay, it's doable.

Javier 47:37

Both partners lie on their sides, with one partner curling behind the other in a spooning position, is ideal for a more relaxed, intimate experience.

Tim 47:44

I like relaxed.

Javier 47:46

Yeah, lazy Tim's just happy to be there.

Chad 47:48

He's happy to be there.

Javier 47:50

He's just laying there, just backing up a little bit, you know, on the group chat Salt Lake City Soaker, that's one I've never heard of. Reverse Calgoro's Outlaw in Alabama. Since you can't turn your back on family, oh Jesus, mary and Joseph, we're not going through sex positions with Herbie because obviously he has just filled up the chat.

Tim 48:13

At some point we're going to have to have Herbie on. Yeah, because he just I think he's going to have stage fright. Yeah, herbie would have stage fright.

Chad 48:19

Yeah he's going to hide under the table.

Javier 48:21

Number three cowgirl or rider. Here one partner lies on their back while the other sits or kneels on top, facing them, or turned away. This position puts the top partner in control of the depth and speed of penetration, offering them the ability to stimulate the areas that weren't blessed for blessed, for them blessed area. It's excitement for clitoral stimulation and allows for great intimacy. I'm a fan of blessed areas.

Tim 48:48

I agree, god bless I think, I think, if you're gonna do it, you gotta bring the lord into the bedroom lord have mercy, uh.

Javier 48:55

Hervey also says the harlem struggle, uh, glad I said we're not reading her aka airplane bathroom position hey, bucket list item.

Chad 49:04

Right, there's a bucket list.

Tim 49:05

Come on hey did you know that you can um join the mile high club in vegas? There is a flight. You just it's like a thousand bucks is it from the bunny ranch? No, they take you up and they have like a bed and all that stuff and you can just fucking do I don't believe and you get a certificate. I don't believe I looked at it and I made the suggestion and I was shot down.

Chad 49:27

Okay, would you pay a thousand dollars for that? No, no.

Javier 49:30

I would I mean.

Tim 49:31

I've done things on an airplane, I'm just happy to be there.

Chad 49:33

I've done things on an airplane. I'm just happy to be there, yeah, but eating peanuts doesn't count, bitch.

Javier 49:37

Well, yes, it does.

Chad 49:40

I gobbled nuts on a plane. Okay, I did what I did.

Javier 49:44

Standing. Okay, I did what I did. Yeah, standing was the airplane one. Um, yeah, no, I've done stuff on a plane stuff, stuff, okay, okay uh, the final two. Uh, obviously doggy style and missionary so, uh, missionaries number one and missionaries number one, it's the most, the most catholic one, old, reliable. Yeah you know, I like being on the bottom, I like being on the bottom, I like being on the bottom.

Chad 50:07

I think literally everyone does.

Javier 50:09

That's the problem. Yeah, yeah, she's like.

Tim 50:13

I just want to not do anything Like, just do it you know I'm just like you take control, yeah, but whenever I'm on top of you, you're just all out of breath and just breathing heavy and feel like you're going to die. Is that just?

Chad 50:26

me. I've always assumed that you were a decent sex dude.

Tim 50:29

I'm just happy to be there. I'm starting to rethink that. I think that you're bad at sex. I'm okay.

Chad 50:35

Is this why you're working out so much recently?

Tim 50:36

I'm just happy to be there.

Javier 50:37

Hey, on the group chat Gladys said that flight is real. It's $300 for 30 minutes.

Chad 50:42

Okay, yeah, no, okay, yeah, no. It is real. How much for five can we like reduce, like, is there a different?

Javier 50:46

five minutes.

Javier 50:47

It's like the variant rate look, I'm not gonna take too long, yeah, I think.

Tim 50:50

I think like it was like one of them I saw was like an hour, it was one hour fly and like they had champagne and all this other stuff and I think it was like close to a thousand dollars.

Chad 50:57

But I I can't listen a thousand I would be interested in 300, that's. You got yourself a goddamn deal 300 you're. You got yourself a goddamn deal.

Tim 51:08

Would you rather it be a helicopter or an airplane? I don't give a shit.

Javier 51:12

Fuck helicopters, because those are more dangerous.

Chad 51:16

Are you actually getting up 30,000 feet, can you? Get up 30,000 feet in 30 minutes, yeah.

Tim 51:22

Unrestricted climb, just go straight up yeah.

Chad 51:24

There's not an unrestricted climb in Vegas. Just go straight up to the fucking moon. It could be a military plane, you don't know. Okay, you know what would make the best. I would pay $1,000 for this If you had an unrestricted climb.

Tim 51:37

On the Vomit Comet and then it just dropped yeah, yeah, yeah and so you just complete gravity, you lose gravity.

Chad 51:43

Yeah, the NASA plane.

Tim 51:45

Yeah, the vomit comet. Yeah, the vomit comet.

Javier 51:47

Are we talking about sex on that? Yes, no, come on, okay, you might as well be like an astronaut.

Javier 51:54

An astronaut.

Javier 51:55

Question can you masturbate in space? I'm sure they do.

Tim 51:59

Can we ask an astronaut? They probably tested it. Dude, you should get on like a panel, like the next astronaut panel.

Javier 52:06

Hello sir, I was should get on like a panel, that's right, the next astronaut panel.

Chad 52:08

Hello sir, I was just curious. I've been wondering this for years. I'm so glad to be here, but um.

Javier 52:12

Can you jerk what?

Chad 52:13

happened when you jerk it on the fucking shuttle.

Javier 52:17

How's the viscosity? The viscosity of the semen that come shot. What's what's?

Tim 52:21

random about this you had to make you went too far.

Chad 52:23

Yeah, you did the thing what's what's?

Tim 52:25

what's completely random about that whole conversation? Right, there is. They talked about what sweat looks like on the person. It doesn't beat up like it does on us, right? It just forms a film.

Chad 52:37

And just kind of sits there, right, it sits there.

Tim 52:39

Yeah, I imagine. The same thing, it just forms a film, okay.

Javier 52:46

I don't like any of that. I mean, Elon's got to be rich enough to be like. I think I'm going to use this Sweat. Just kind of sits there, though, yeah.

Chad 52:53

You're talking about something that's a little different.

Tim 52:55

Well, yeah, you got a point.

Chad 52:58

It's like they always shoot out their food and eat it you know Exactly, it's going to be just like that.

Javier 53:07

Stop, that's gross, just like that. Shoot it out and eat it. Episode 169, everybody, I mean there's got to be, there's going to be at some point, a study where they have to go into space.

Tim 53:14

No, I'm sure they already have. I want to say wasn't there a?

The Eclipse and CERN Concerns

Chad 53:17

study not too long ago that was saying like you can't get pregnant in space. Wasn't that a thing, or did I make that up? I think, that's something that we lie about, just so we can do it without, so we can get people into space and have sex without protection. Is that the thing? No, you can't.

Tim 53:36

I think we're just gaslighting people.

Javier 53:37

You can't get pregnant when you're on top. It sucks.

Tim 53:40

I'm just going to pull out real quick. It's fine, you're so stupid? I think that's a lie to get the other astronauts down.

Chad 53:49

All right. So whether you have more and more things to talk about, that's fine, because I'm here for it. I did want to ask are you all excited about this whole eclipse thing?

Javier 53:57

Yeah, I wanted to ask for it off, but I'm looking at the everyday gadzooks.

Tim 54:04

The weather's not going to be that great Gadzooks isn't around anymore. They say that the weather's going to be cloudy, so I get some updates from the weather buddies.

Chad 54:15

Al Roker hits you up and is like hey, this is what's happening, You're in the woods bitch.

Javier 54:19

Hey Tim, thanks for that blowjob. So what they're saying?

Tim 54:24

is that there's a good possibility that there's going to be some upper level clouds right Upper level clouds but we should still be able to see it.

Chad 54:33

Then why the fuck are you talking about?

Tim 54:34

So that's good, that's good, right, yeah, but I'm concerned with CERN.

Chad 54:40

Oh God, what is happening? Cern is the particle thing in Europe, or whatever. Yeah.

Tim 54:47

So I posted this on um the other day and I was like is anybody else concerned.

Chad 54:49

Facebook, there's people, no one.

Tim 54:52

My, my your mom, my, my cousin asked me what cern was and um were they concerned yes, once I explained to

Javier 55:04

him what it was concerned. So the thing about it is.

Tim 55:06

So here we are right, they're going to have this eclipse happen. Yes, and it's been two years since they fired up CERN In search of the god particle or whatever right, They've already found it. Oh, I know. Now they're just trying to replicate it. They're trying to make black holes or whatever. My theory is they're trying to get us off this godforsaken fucking timeline and get us onto something else.

Chad 55:30

I don't I don't disagree. I mean they're probably in the right on that oh yeah, 100.

Tim 55:35

So if we jump timelines, which timeline do you want to go to it?

Chad 55:38

depends. So what's going to happen if we say bernstein bears now and it becomes bernstein bears again? Will this recording still be real?

Tim 55:49

Yeah, it'll be real because it's happening right now on that timeline.

Javier 55:53

Right.

Tim 55:53

But it might be a different topic altogether.

Chad 55:58

I've had too much beer to even make sense of this.

Tim 56:01

I know it's not going to make any sense. I'm just hoping.

Chad 56:05

So why are they firing it back up? I'm just hoping that.

Tim 56:07

I come back as the Ninja Turtle version of myself. I want to be a turtle eating pizza and fighting crime in New York City.

Chad 56:16

Okay, back to. We're not actually talking about the CERN itself.

Tim 56:21

I have no idea why they're firing it back up. I have no idea what they're doing.

Javier 56:24

The fact that they're doing it at the time of the eclipse.

Tim 56:27

It's just kind of just very weird.

Chad 56:28

Yeah, because it's an eclipse for us. It's not an eclipse for the rest of the world you understand that right?

Tim 56:34

no, it's an eclipse for the rest of the world, it's like my mom goes did you know that?

Chad 56:41

like? Because andrew's gonna be in japan. He left for japan on sunday.

Javier 56:44

Oh that sucks, because the gundam's gone and he loves going to be in Japan. He left for Japan on Sunday. Oh, that sucks because the Gundam's gone and he loves going to watch that Gundam.

Chad 56:49

He's there for the cherry blossoms and they just started, yeah.

Javier 56:53

I was going to say Beautiful.

Chad 56:55

He's already been sitting in pictures and video. Beautiful. So he's there for the cherry blossoms.

Tim 56:59

Yeah, he's going to miss the eclipse.

Chad 57:00

Yeah, and Mom's like did you know that he's not going to be able to see the eclipse? I'm like, yeah, Mom, we are lucky enough to be able to be in the line A few years ago when it was.

Tim 57:09

Yeah, it was Kansas City, right?

Chad 57:11

Yeah, we drove up to Kansas City and saw it or whatever. It was like, yeah, it's not going to be everywhere. It blew her mind.

Tim 57:16

It's like Seinfeld though the eclipse is for everyone. It's like the Festivus for the rest of us.

Chad 57:23

It's not for everyone, and the people with the CERN aren't even going to see the eclipse.

Javier 57:29

Yeah, but they know I'm going to give you all, they know it's happening?

Tim 57:32

How do you know there's been eclipses, eclipsi Eclipse. There's been a Eclipse.

Chad 57:42

What is a plural of eclipse?

Tim 57:44

Is it just eclipse-y? What is a plural of eclipse? Is it just?

Chad 57:46

eclipsy.

Javier 57:46

It's like moose. Is it like, Seriously, what is the plural of eclipse? Harvey said check on them. There's a tsunami that hit Japan.

Chad 57:53

Oh, okay, when was that? Because he got there yesterday. He's fine, he's surfing, don't say that.

Javier 58:00

Please don't say that. Don't say that he's fine, I will check on it. I'm going to give you. While you do that, I'm going to give you a quick, fun sex fact. Did you know? In ancient Egypt it was believed that the Nile River's fertility was linked to the pharaoh's ejaculation. It was ritual for the pharaoh to masturbate into the river to ensure a good flood and subsequently a good harvest.

Tim 58:22

That's what I do at the Trinity all the time.

Javier 58:24

And whenever I do that, I get called like a beast or a blasphemer no man, I just do in the the darkness.

Tim 58:32

It's very strange and upsetting it's fine, go behind jameli. Taiwan got hit by with an earthquake yeah well, um yeah, so anyways, thank you for all those random facts. I'm just concerned about cern, though. Um, it's weird that it's happening at the same time, just randomly what are y'all doing for the eclipse?

Chad 58:52

uh, I'm working, I'm working.

Javier 58:53

I'm working.

Tim 58:54

I'm going to stand outside and watch it and then I'm going to go back in and finish my day.

Javier 58:57

It's only going to last like two minutes here in Fort Worth.

Chad 59:00

I think it was like hey look, that's a pretty long time it is, it is. Four minutes in this they got years ago it was getting a whole like two hours. No, they're not. It was like 10 or 15 seconds in kansas city really. Yeah, it was like real short. He got everything, got dark and then it's light again, like it was just like no time at all.

Tim 59:21

So this would still be really fucking cool that's crazy why was it so short in kansas? I thought that was like the totality thing it was totality, but like this, is just a different it's a different eclipse? Yeah, obviously not the same eclipse. It's not the same, it's a different I.

Chad 59:32

It's a different eclipse. Yeah, obviously Not the same eclipse. It's not the same eclipse, it's a different eclipse.

Tim 59:35

I thought it's the same eclipse, it just happens in different places throughout the year.

Chad 59:39

I think I want to go. I know that all these different breweries are doing shit.

Javier 59:43

Rabbit Hole's doing an eclipse and drink party.

Chad 59:46

Hotfusion's doing a thing, martin House is doing a thing, I think RAR is doing a thing Maybe I'll just leave early, I don't know. So I was going to go, like I could go to the office and, honestly, downtown Dallas would be great. You could go up top. Well, I'm already in, like I'm on the 17th floor of this building where I can see all of downtown.

Javier 1:00:03

I can go to the 36th building. There's no planes flying around. You need to get on the roof.

Chad 1:00:07

Yeah, that would be able to see everything just remember to prop the door open.

Tim 1:00:11

I don't want to go to work.

Chad 1:00:13

I don't want to be at work while this is happening, so I'm going to work from home.

Tim 1:00:16

Well, no, I mean, whenever the apocalypse happens, you don't want to be at work right that's the last place could you imagine the eclipse happens, cern fires up, it's the apocalypse. And you're stuck on the 17th floor.

Chad 1:00:28

Buddy, you're, you're fucked I'm not doing that, I just said bring a parachute, I'm I'm gonna go drink somewhere in the middle of the afternoon for a second and uh that sounds like your normal work day, not on a monday, do you guys have your glasses tuesday

Javier 1:00:43

though yes, yeah, about a month ago, just in case, yeah me too. I bought a counterfeit one from timu my fucking god, dude, you're gonna go blind, you fucking idiot. No, no, jesse's mom Tamu.

Javier 1:00:55

Jesse's mom Tamu Tamu.

Tim 1:00:57

Jesse's mom gave us some for Christmas in preparation.

Javier 1:01:00

Nice, that was smart. We just got to figure out where they're at.

Tim 1:01:03

Oh, my God, If not, I'm going to do it like the old welder trick, where you switch your eyes and look through the crack.

Javier 1:01:14

But do you remember that last one? Go ahead. We had a clips like a month or two ago it was. Yeah, I would know it was like in september.

Chad 1:01:18

I stare directly at it well, because I put on six pairs of sunglasses you fucking idiots who has six pairs of sunglasses.

Javier 1:01:24

This rich white man does he sure?

Chad 1:01:26

does? I got those clips for my glasses. I was trying to figure out which ones were the most comfortable, and so they all came in from timu and they were all like two bucks a piece, and so I put on like stack on stack, just clip on sunglasses.

Javier 1:01:37

So, and I still went blind for a few minutes so me and tammy uh had a garage sale and that was the day of the eclipse and the eeriness of like how dark it got yeah was just crazy because like everything got kind of dark the leaves- oh yeah, you took pictures and video of, like the multiple leaves.

Tim 1:01:56

I was at a funeral that day. Oh, that was weird, that soul went to hell I hope not. Who was it?

Javier 1:02:03

I'm sorry, he's a nice guy I don't know man, it went to hell um that's pretty fucked up.

Chad 1:02:08

What was that?

Tim 1:02:09

what was that? Uh, what was that one movie where he's talking about like, how, like, after his granddad died, the flame flickered and he was like he didn't go to heaven, man, if he's going to, the flame flickered man.

Javier 1:02:22

Hey, boys in hell. No, we're all going to hell. Man, was that on Anchorman 2? Oh, I know I'm going to hell, it's going to be a good time.

Javier 1:02:31

It's going to be a fucking party.

Javier 1:02:35

Yeah, I think we're gonna have a good time. I have my glasses ready, I'm gonna you're gonna watch it from work.

Tim 1:02:38

I'm just gonna watch it from work step outside you're gonna stop popping dents in a minute and look up all right, my dad's gonna be like all right, get back to work, you fucking.

Javier 1:02:46

But if I go somewhere, you're gonna go right, yeah, obviously I'm gonna go over there.

Tim 1:02:50

Okay, cool, yeah, I'm gonna see if'm going to see if I can just get off Dad.

Javier 1:02:53

I got to go Is this happening at what like 3?

Tim 1:02:55

140.

Chad 1:02:56

I can't get off that early. Sure you can. Just, you got to work for Dude. Who the hell works in the office? My job, everyone else in the office all the time, dude, traffic's going to be nuts. Yeah, no one's going to be working. They're all talking about like downtown Dallas, like in the Discovery District. They're like we're giving out 4,000 pairs of glasses.

Tim 1:03:16

Speaking of that. So I had to drive all the way out, and I don't want to get into why I had to go out here, but I had to go out to Sunnyvale, which is on the other side of Dallas, towards Terrell. Okay, my time kept going up on 30.

Tim 1:03:30

It kept saying like 30 more minutes, it's going to take 40 more minutes or whatever. It was faster for me to drive through to Discovery District and pick up 30 on the other side of downtown than it was to stay on the freeway. I don't doubt it.

Chad 1:03:42

It made no sense, Dude, that's why I take the train, man, I hate it.

Tim 1:03:46

I almost drove today. It doesn't go out that far.

Siamese Twins Marriage and Confusion

Chad 1:03:49

Yeah, that's true, but that's why I don't drive to Dallas. It's just a shit show man. Yeah, I don't blame you. I will drive the 20 to 30 minutes to the train station and take an extra 15 or 30 minutes a day so that I don't have to deal with the bullshit Real quick.

Javier 1:04:04

I want to go back to that earthquake that Hervey was talking about.

Tim 1:04:07

You go back to that earthquake.

Javier 1:04:14

Did you check and see how it was a 7.5 hit in Taipei and buildings are collapsing Like big, major buildings are collapsing Like I'm watching video on complex right now. It is ridiculous, I'm, it's, oh my God.

Chad 1:04:33

OK.

Javier 1:04:35

Oh, my Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Sorry, buddy, this got weird and quiet.

Chad 1:04:40

Tim left, I went outside to go. So let's talk. And I was checking in on my brother, let's. Yeah, bobby was talking nonsense. Sorry, make sure he's okay, he's fine. He said he's fine, he's like I don't know what the fuck you're.

Javier 1:04:49

ah, no, I don't know what the fuck you're?

Chad 1:04:52

No, I'm kidding, no, I'm just kidding. Don't put that fucking juju on him, ricky Bobby.

Javier 1:04:54

I wish Well he's going to be there. I know they just got rid of the big one-for-one scale Gundam that moved in Japan. That was last night. They had a huge show.

Chad 1:05:06

But he might have gone.

Javier 1:05:08

He's been there since yesterday morning, I think it was like maybe two days ago Two days ago, but it was a huge deal. They still got the big one. Another one it's the Unicorn Gundam. Another one.

Javier 1:05:18

Another one. Is it like Mexico? No, I don't think the one. I think Mexico the earthquake was worse. It's only because the infrastructure there wasn't really equipped for it. It's kind of like after I think 85 or 86, the equipped for it. It's kind of like after like I think 85 or 86, the same thing happened and um, it's, I think the it's not the same magnitude. I think they're more modernized so their buildings can equip, are able to be equipped with that type of um type of thing hey what do y'all think about?

Javier 1:05:45

uh are we gonna wrap this up, no, hey. Well, what do y'all think about uh enhancement drugs, like uh viagra or like blue chew?

Tim 1:05:53

or blue. True, blue chew is viagra and I'm trying to figure out why I'm getting so many um like ads for that other than like age. It has to be the age. Yeah, it's gotta be we're 38 dude.

Javier 1:06:04

We're in our late 30s.

Tim 1:06:06

It works fine. I don't need it. I'm curious. Yeah, me too. I mean, would you want to pop to viagra and see what happens?

Javier 1:06:13

I would pop I would pop a blue shoe because, like I'm not gonna lie, be getting older and chubbier and like not as active, I think my stamina's gone down a bit.

Tim 1:06:22

Well, yeah, start doing some cardio.

Javier 1:06:25

I heard you got, you went back in the gym, right, yeah, but then my arms hurt and then I stopped going yeah, well, I need to go back. I need to go back yeah um I think, you know stuff like that does help. I mean, I don't know I I don't mind getting sponsored by blue chew. Today's episode, sponsored by blue chew I don't know.

Chad 1:06:42

I've never actually thought about it until uh drake mentioned poppin to cialis in a sprite or something like that in one of his rap songs. I'm like what the?

Javier 1:06:52

fuck, if drake's doing it, then I gotta do it too I was like well it's. It's worked out great for him apparently for the video I don't know man, that thing, that's floppy. It's like this blah. You've seen that, wiener? It's like floppy, like this I didn't.

Chad 1:07:06

I didn't actually watch the video, I was curious.

Javier 1:07:09

I'm like let's see what.

Chad 1:07:10

Of course, you were All right, I didn't, because I'm a normal person, so we went all over the place with this.

Tim 1:07:15

We got dark, we got happy. Javier brought a bunch of random sex stuff to us. This episode's weird, but you know what, whenever Javier makes an episode off the top of the dome, it's going to be weird.

Chad 1:07:27

It was a lot of fun.

Javier 1:07:34

Did. Can we talk about all the things that we mentioned in the group text earlier? I feel like we mentioned everything On the group chat. Birth control should be just as easily accessible and accepted as Viagra. You know, I did go into CVS and they did have a sign that said they were going to kind of start having it over the counter, like when you would get a Plan B or something Viagra. But yeah, no, no, no, plan B's always been over the like a Plan B or something.

Tim 1:07:53

Viagra, but yeah, no, no no.

Chad 1:07:54

Plan B's always been over-the-counter.

Javier 1:07:56

Plan B's always been over-the-counter, but the same thing for birth control.

Tim 1:07:59

It's behind the counter, over-the-counter. But it's over-the-counter, yeah, which?

Javier 1:08:03

one is the you have to go behind the counter. Which one's?

Tim 1:08:18

the one where I can just pick it up and that's over the counter. Yeah, okay, birth control. They had a birth control sign for over the counter at cvs. Yeah, it's called condoms. That's probably that's all they're gonna give you two things that you had sent tim.

Chad 1:08:27

One was this uh, no, just one. We're just gonna get into one, I think, um, the one with the girl, with the two girls that got married.

Javier 1:08:36

Oh, the two-headed, that beast with two backs.

Chad 1:08:42

No, that's fucked up. Is it really that was?

Javier 1:08:45

messed up.

Javier 1:08:45

All right, so what you did is not okay.

Chad 1:08:48

She's got one back.

Javier 1:08:50

She said two backs All right, so Two heads.

Tim 1:08:53

What is it, abby? And I can't remember the other girl's name anyways britney abby and britney hensel. Um, got well, one of them got married the other day. Oh, one of them got married, yes, but the other one got married too, right? No, because that's that's illegal. Are you sure what it is that's illegal? You can't get married to two people and they're two they had two separate social dudes. It's fucking weird, but it makes sense. They're two heads right.

Javier 1:09:16

So two separate brains, two separate consciousness right.

Tim 1:09:19

So they've got, uh, their own separate socials. They get their own driver's license, ids or whatever. They they're both school teachers, so I'm trying to figure out how that works. Um, so they get two paychecks or one. You're obviously there's a lot of questions about this.

Chad 1:09:34

So how does the body work? Is it like half and half? No, no, no, no no, no, no.

Tim 1:09:38

So they share all the organs. Okay, so everything is shared between the two of them? Yeah, but like, if I want to move my arm, from what?

Chad 1:09:54

it sounds like, is they both can move shit yeah.

Tim 1:09:56

Who's?

Chad 1:09:56

I don't know who's consummating the marriage?

Tim 1:09:59

Right, that's the question, that is it cheating if you like.

Javier 1:10:03

stick it in the wrong, I can't say the wrong mouth yeah.

Tim 1:10:07

Maybe. So the question is like are they both married to the same guy? But like on paper, they're not. On paper it's just one, but both are married.

Chad 1:10:19

No, because you said they're two different people, two different people, right, right. So one's married. One's married on paper oh they're single.

Tim 1:10:25

One's married on paper, right. The other one's technically single on paper, right yeah. But how does that work out? The other one gets married and Right yeah, but how's?

Chad 1:10:32

that work out. The other one gets married, and so you got. They just have a life of threesomes, foursomes, threesomes, foursomes, threesomes, foursomes, threesomes, foursomes. There's a song that was on.

Tim 1:10:41

So is it a threesome right now? What if one of them ends up hating?

Chad 1:10:44

the dude.

Javier 1:10:45

Exactly Like what if the?

Chad 1:10:46

sister that's not married ends up fucking hating earplugs. There's a?

Tim 1:10:49

there's a all time there's a.

Javier 1:10:52

There's a song from the bill intense, excellent adventure soundtrack. It's called two heads are better than one.

Tim 1:10:58

This is the yeah, I'm really, I'm really confused by the whole situation and it's and it's hit social media like crazy. You've got all these people asking the same question that everybody else is asking, like I mean.

Chad 1:11:09

I'm happy for him. Don't get me wrong. That's great, right. Everyone needs to find love. Everyone needs to find somebody, but that is a very confusing situation.

Javier 1:11:16

Yeah, I can't tell if Christy's trying to make a joke. I just can't wrap my head around that.

Tim 1:11:21

It's a predicament. So even besides that, I want to know do they get separate paychecks? Yeah, they do, I'm sure they do, but they're in the same classroom, so they've got two teachers, you're making double money. How does that work right?

Javier 1:11:34

They did say that each one controls one part of the body. Okay, so each one controls one part of the body.

Chad 1:11:41

So that is the thing. It's like half and half. That's what the doctor said, yeah.

Javier 1:11:45

And for more scientific research. On the group chat, Hervey says if they have a baby, does he have to pay the other lady for children. If they have a baby, does he have to pay the other lady?

Tim 1:11:55

for children? I don't know, because I mean they're living together, so it's not like they have a choice right?

Javier 1:12:00

It's just really confusing.

Tim 1:12:02

So I actually follow a separate set of Siamese twins and I can only remember one of the girls' names Lupita. They're fucking funny man, they are hilarious, but they keep getting tagged and all this stuff and they're like, look, I mean good on them if it works out, for you know whatever. Basically I mean like quit judging what they're saying, what they're doing and all that stuff. But there's some scientific questions that did you get the? Text. Did you get the text? I saw the one from the chat.

Chad 1:12:33

The curious.

Javier 1:12:34

What did it say?

Chad 1:12:35

Okay, from the chat they do get separate checks, but since they're women, they now get what one male's paycheck would be Fucking shit.

Javier 1:12:44

That's so fucked.

Javier 1:12:46

That's so messed up, so I just got a text from Jared.

Tim 1:12:49

Jared, that's fake. It's fake, jared. It's not real. I looked it up on Twitter. That's not even their real account, but go ahead and read it.

Javier 1:12:58

This is from Twitter account. Two Heads Are Better.

Tim 1:13:04

I looked up that account. It's not real.

Javier 1:13:06

That sounds obviously fake, because everyone is. This is from the Twitter feed which is not.

Chad 1:13:13

The fake one, because everyone is asking.

Javier 1:13:14

We're just going to tell you yes, I have sex with my husband. Yes, I go down on him. Yes, my sister Brittany is there. Yes, my sister and I orgasm as one. But when I sleep with my husband, she's usually reading a book or listening to a true crime podcast, so she just puts the pleasure out of her mind.

Tim 1:13:33

That sounds ridiculous they're clearly, I'm just gonna say it they are a throuple they're I mean you kind of have to be, it's just on pay I? I just feel like on paper it is just one guy look, it's just one girl.

Javier 1:13:47

It's a very taboo situation, you know.

Chad 1:13:49

You know what I mean it'd be more of a struggle to try to separate yourself from the situation than it is to just be like look, we're both here, yeah, we're both enjoying it.

Tim 1:13:58

We're both here, like I feel like if it was, just make sure, make sure my, it was me and you tim we just have to like agree on someone, eventually like if, if we had this if we had two heads on one body javier, it's like it's the logical explanation we we're going to have to, we're going to have to pleasure Javier yeah man, give it to her.

Javier 1:14:16

Hey, give it to her, she wants it.

Chad 1:14:18

We're going to give it to Javier. We can't have two Javier's out there, that'd be a fucking mess. We're both going to have to agree on somebody. They should have a podcast Incredible.

Javier 1:14:31

On the real. I mean, I think they would take off.

Chad 1:14:34

They would Not that it matters Podcast, bullshit anyway hey but just real quick.

Tim 1:14:39

Gypsy Rose update. She's not with her husband now.

Javier 1:14:42

What she went to.

Tim 1:14:43

Davidson.

Chad 1:14:45

I guess the D no, that was fake too. Is it because we talked about it on our show?

Tim 1:14:49

Yeah, I guess the D wasn't that fire, but she's now talking. She was seen at a tattoo parlor with a former ex while she was in prison and he was getting a tattoo, okay.

Chad 1:15:01

So, and this is the one that she. Yeah, killed her mom. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Javier 1:15:06

That guy, she got with that guy.

Chad 1:15:09

No, he's not out of prison, he's still in prison.

Tim 1:15:10

No, no, no, no no no.

Chad 1:15:11

A different ex when she was in prison While she was in prison.

Tim 1:15:13

She was with this one guy. Yeah yeah, pen pal. Yeah yeah, I don't know Damn All right. So y'all got anything else to say?

Javier 1:15:21

Anything else, Javier man.

Tim 1:15:29

Hey God.

Javier 1:15:30

LOL, oh fuck, no, no, I think, now that we're coming on the time of spring, I think we need to go out and enjoy it more. Dude, it is so pretty outside and green. Go out there and have a picnic. I want to have a picnic, I'd love to have a picnic.

Tim 1:15:50

Hey, I have a question, chad. We can't have your questions. Picnic I'd love. Hey, I have a question, chad, we can't.

The Funky Panther Show

Javier 1:15:53

We can't have your questions I'm sorry, what's what was it? What's your question, chad?

Tim 1:15:57

if you were going to be on one tv show, what would it be? Mine would be the cosby show, for obvious reasons. All that, that's wild, all right. Anyways, the amanda show, the Amanda Show. Boy Meets World. Why don't y'all think?

Javier 1:16:15

about that? No, no, no, step by step, step by step.

Chad 1:16:20

Are all of these shows on this thing.

Tim 1:16:22

I'm going to swoop in no no. I'm going to swoop in and steal Topanga.

Javier 1:16:27

You can have Topanga, I'll have.

Tim 1:16:30

Which one?

Javier 1:16:31

Which one you?

Tim 1:16:32

said step by step.

Javier 1:16:33

Which one? From step by step. Oh, al, totally yeah, I was into that. No one's better than Topanga, you idiot she was I don't know man.

Javier 1:16:40

There's a lot of hot ladies on that, suzanne. Somers Rau, suzanne, somers dude.

Chad 1:16:46

Like French kiss, that was loud.

Tim 1:16:51

It's loud because your headphones are up. All right, everybody. Thank you for hanging out with us.

Chad 1:16:55

I know it was a little bit longer of an episode than we generally have, but we were having a good time. We had a few beers. Thanks for hanging out with us. If you don't already do so, please make sure you subscribe to our YouTube channel. Go, check us out. On our first 30. We talked even more of the things that you probably don't want to hear about, but check it out anyway. Follow us on all things social media at TheFunkyPanther. All of this is at TheFunkyPanthercom, and also call text. Leave us a voicemail 817-677-0408. Stay good, everybody. I'm Chad.

Javier 1:17:25

I'm Javier and I'm Tim, and we are.

Tim 1:17:27

The Funky.

Compter 1:17:28

Panther.

Chad 1:17:30

Much love everyone. Let's talk about your cable ace award.

Compter 1:17:32

Let's talk about buttered sausage. Talk about buttered sausage when it comes from what it does. Why is it doing what it's doing? Get it out of my face. What about buttered sausage? You?