The Funky Panther
The Funky Panther podcast: Chad, Javier, and Tim deliver high-energy, hilarious banter with random commentary, raunchy humor, and featured guests. Join the fun for an hour-long show that takes you on a refreshing, informative journey through the colorful world of music, news, arts, and entertainment.
The Funky Panther
A Very Funky Halloween
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Ever wondered what Halloween would look like through the eyes of a country musician or a mischievous Batman? Join us for this week's episode of the Funky Panther where we transform Halloween into a whimsical country music extravaganza. From imagining adults trick-or-treating to laughing about costume bar-hopping, we usher you into a world where cowboy hats meet candy corn and a crime-free Gotham makes Batman hit the sweets. Our creative musings might even inspire you to craft your own quirky Halloween playlist!
We've also got a lot to say about the art world, including how personal connections can sometimes outweigh market value. Our chat covers everything from the chaos of Banksy shredding his own art to the curious case of Mel B's daughter dipping her toes into an artistic career. With a sprinkle of nostalgia, we fondly remember classics like "Casper" and bring you up to speed on A24’s latest cinematic offerings. Let's not forget our lively banter about the challenges of art investment and the surprising impact of family ties in making or breaking an artist's career.
But wait, there's more! Ever confused Kid Cudi's role in the movie "X"? We've got that covered, too. Travel with us through the eerie narrative twists of "X," "Pearl," and "Maxine." We explore the spooky plotlines, unravel the chilling moments, and chuckle at our own mix-ups. Whether you're here for the cinematic insights or just a hearty laugh, this episode promises a rollercoaster of entertainment, humor, and unexpected revelations.
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I saw this picture, the other day.
Speaker 2I saw this picture the other day. It popped up and remember all the old, really dumb ads that would try to get you to play a little mini game before they got you to click on the ad. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. So there was this one ad. It's crazy how different our ads have been over the past I don't know 20 years.
Speaker 2This is like early internet, right, so early 2000s. So it's literally. I think it was osama bin laden sitting down knitting a flag in a rocking chair and then george bush and the other one sitting down and you had to click a red button fast enough to where you're knitting the American flag faster than Saddam or Bin Laden doing his flag or whatever. What happens if you lose 9-11. I don't know, but I'm like this is an ad. This is a real ad. You're probably is what you caused the towers to come down, since we don't do the first 30, because Javier didn't want to do the first 30.
Speaker 4No no no no, we do the first 30 when there's guests when there's guests.
Speaker 2That's what I'm saying. I want to go ahead, since I might as well at this point. Right, we're going to kick it off. And before we kick it off much like we did previously, where I had that one song on there we're just going to let this play through, okay? So let me get the volume all the way through before we start, and then it's going to kick in and say get in here and start the show.
Speaker 3Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, say what. Say what, yeah, tim, chad and Javier are making it hot. Ooh, yeah, that funky beat hit the spot, never gonna stop. Uh-huh, javier's the wild color that life is saying Ooh, bringing laughs and stunts that'll blow your brain. Say what Unpredictable and wild keeps the pace alive. Ooh, yeah, ooh yeah. You never know what he'll do, but it's always a vibe. Come on, tim Twist and K do, but it's always a vibe. Come on tim twisting knobs, making magic in the air. Twist knobs, he's an old knob twister. Javier lighting fires, bringing that crazy flair. Come on, funky panther podcast. You better beware. Funky panther podcast bringing the groove tune in every week. Feel the vibe, make a move. I mean it's not bad.
Speaker 2It's funky. Fresh is what it is. Talks about me twisting knobs and you've got the blueprint and Javier's just bringing the wild. I don't hate it. I'm here for it.
Speaker 5Get in here. We've got to start the show. Is this show just about me? We've got to start the show.
Speaker 4He's got his penis out and he's jacking off in your hands, right. Is that how the song went? Jizzing, and muffins.
Speaker 2Oh, hello everyone. And shut the fuck up, Javier. We have got a fantastic show for you here on episode 185. We don't really know what we're going to talk about, but probably a little bit of Halloween, because that's right around the corner.
Speaker 4We have a text thread full of things.
Speaker 5I think those are. Is that what we're going to talk about? Yeah, I thought they were good.
Speaker 2You're also, let me get to what I was going to say before you rudely interrupt it. Sorry, but since we don't know what we're going to talk about, you should call text we would love to have you on the air. 817-677-0408. I think we got to turn that feature on what feature you got to turn it where you accept calls with the voice, because right now it just goes straight to voicemail really yeah, no, that can't be right yeah, I'm gonna turn that shit on then, all right, sit back, relax and enjoy.
Speaker 2Let's get into it.
Speaker 4I'm chad I'm javier, that's it, and we are the Funky Panther.
Speaker 2I put it on the interwebs you did.
Speaker 5I mean yes.
Speaker 2I'm going to go ahead and take that our voice number straight from off, from straight voicemail. Yeah, do that, do not disturb, is on. I did not realize.
Speaker 1Well, do that.
Speaker 2Do not disturb is on. I did not realize. Well, if it's off, if it's on on off, if it's off, I can't talk. It was on, but if it's off, it's going to ring to your phone all the time.
Speaker 3It's going to annoy you because, all the phone calls that we get.
Speaker 2So I'll just leave the line open, right, and when we're on air we'll catch that shit, and when we're not, it'll be on. Do not serve, it'll go straight to voicemail and then we'll play your voicemail on air. Yeah, I think that's a good thing, so I started doing some weird stuff today.
Speaker 5What are you doing?
Speaker 2I'm pointing so people know what we are and who we are and what we do.
Speaker 5Why don't you make yourself?
Country Halloween Trick-or-Treating Batman
Speaker 2more centered. I wanted to create some Halloween themed music.
Speaker 4Trick or treat.
Speaker 2Because I mean it is.
Speaker 4Halloween.
Speaker 5To season's greetings. It's Halloween.
Speaker 2I just want to get your reaction. Let's see what you think about this. Okay, I'll tell you what the prompt. Want to get your reaction. Let's see what you think about this, okay, okay, I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what the prompt. That's my reaction. Let's see if you can guess the prompt.
Speaker 3October night, the moon shining bright, whiskey in my hand, feeling all right, decided on a whim and the liquor's glow. Gonna trick or treat, even though I'm grown, knocking on doors without a disguise Neighbors all laugh, he's out of his mind. Candy in my pocket mixin' with beer. Didn't think twice. I had no fear. I'm a grown-ass man trick-or-treatin' tonight, stumblin' through the streets under the porch lights. No costume on, just my foolish grin. Halloween hiccup, let the trouble begin.
Speaker 2Alright, I think I've got a pretty good idea. I think I've nailed this. By the way, Do you want to go ahead and start?
Speaker 1Because I know mine is probably correct. What was the question?
Speaker 2What prop?
Speaker 5did I use Adult trick-or-treater or child molester?
Speaker 2trick-or-treater. That's good, see, I like where your direction was going, because that was my exact. He has candy in his pocket and beer in his hand. Not even dressed up as a fucking anything, he's just going around knocking on doors, knocking on doors.
Speaker 1He doesn't have a bag, so he's putting the candy in his pocket.
Speaker 2The prompt was Diddy on Halloween, as if he was a country musician. That's it, you won. That was honestly exactly what I put it. I knew it. I knew it. That's diddy, but as a country musician. As a country musician, you got candy in his pocket, lube in his butt. I don't know how that works really, but it was definitely diddy. I should add that to the prop next time. Candy in my pocket? I got a thousand gallons of lube in my butt. What?
Speaker 5when y'all start talking, I might try to see if I can come up with with a song about a thousand gallons of lube okay and nowhere to go, yeah, yeah, when I walked in, uh, I was telling tim, I was like do you gotta put these songs out like on an album or something like? Ai songs of the funky panther. Yeah, we can.
Speaker 2We have that thing so I I don't I create a country album. I've got a bunch of halloween inspired country songs. I don't think that there's a maximum to what you can load. Can we just load thousands of songs to the fucking camera? It just depends on how much load you have.
Speaker 5I mean you're going to need a lot of energy to keep up with that load.
Speaker 2I mean, we're already paying a yearly subscription to it.
Speaker 1I don't see why it couldn't hurt. All right, here's the next one, okay, okay.
Speaker 3The moon was bright above this sleepy town. Had too many shots, everything spinning in a round Another country one.
Speaker 2Okay, See your vibes.
Speaker 3This week, tom Fall country Stumbled down the road, bottle in my hand, knocked on Mr Jenkins' door, tried to stand. He said boy, what you think you're doing? Man Told him trick or treating. I'm just working on my tan, drunk and naked, on Halloween night. Neighbors calling cops saying it ain't right. Candy in my bag but no costume inside. Oh, I'm drunk and naked on Halloween night. We've all been there. Yeah, all right, all right. What was the prompt? Halloween?
Speaker 2night. We've all been there. Yeah, all right. All right. What was the prompt? The prompt was Will Ferrell from old school. On Halloween he's going through the quad Fuck.
Speaker 5I'm trying to think of other Kenneth Copeland, naked and drunk, asking for donations. That's actually correct. Wow, well done Kenneth Copeland, naked and drunk, asking for donations. How is he not dead?
Speaker 2How is he not dead? Well, he sold his soul to the devil so he could on the doors and get some candy. I won't.
Speaker 5God gave me the power.
Speaker 2All right, so you already know what the theme has been so far. It's been country.
Speaker 5Hillbilly Halloween.
Speaker 2All right, so last one, last one.
Speaker 3When the full moon's rising and the shadows creep In this little town, there ain't no sleep. On Halloween night, we're raising hell With a pocket full of candy and a story to tell. Kids in their costumes are out for the night, but I'm on the prowl looking for a fight. Candy corn in my back pocket, beer in my hand. I'm the toughest dude in this haunted land, kickin' ass, fighting for the candy. Little monsters think they're. Oh so, dandy, I'll take them all with a grin and a sneer Candy corn, brawling and sweetened down beer.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 3Witches and goblins. They got nothing on me.
Speaker 2Okay. Yeah, I know these all seem very creepy though, tim. Yeah, I know these all seem very creepy though Tim. I don't know they all sound the same.
Speaker 4It's all like beer in my hand and candy in my pocket. I don't got a bag and you know, play pocket rocket, some shit. Play pocket rocket.
Speaker 2All right. So that's a very drunk country Batman who's out trick-or-treating for Halloween but just assumes everyone's a bad guy because they're all dressed up. So he's just like whooping kids' asses. He's just like fucking pile-driving fucking kids as they're trying to trick-or-treat.
Speaker 5Jeffrey Epstein cruising for underage kids and with beer in his hand, no it was 100% Batman.
Speaker 2So whenever I was writing the prompt for this, I was envisioning exactly what Chad just said Batman's drunk off his ass, right, because at this point in time, crime has ceased to exist in the land. So what? Do you do so. Batman's bored. So what does he do? Yeah, he gets. He gets fucking blackout wasted. He loved his favorite. His favorite candy is candy corn.
Speaker 5It's the most underrated candy of the worst candy or the corn it's the worst of the corn. It's the worst candy of the corn.
Speaker 4It's the worst candy of the corn oh shit, we're in a planet-shaped corn cup now, yeah, and so that's what I envisioned whenever I wrote that prompt.
Speaker 2That was exactly correct. That was the prompt I created, nailed it but yeah, tonight was all about getting drunk and going trick-or-treating as adults. Because I want to ask a question real quick how long is it and how thick that's exactly? You're on a roll tonight. I'm so impressed. The real question was when is it too old to stop trick-or-treating? When the real question was um, when is it too old to stop trick-or-treating? Uh, like, when do you have to stop? 14? Uh, yeah, about 20 years ago, I think.
Speaker 2So I remember my mom always like I think, when you're out of high school yeah, I think when you're out of school it's time to hit like uh, nine o'clock and she's like the bigger kids are coming, we can turn off the lights. So she shut the lights off on the front porch. Nobody would show up at the door. Yeah, I was. I was always like I was embarrassed to go trick-or-treating as I got older. I mean, I had a little brother, I had little brothers, right so, like you had a well, I had a reason hang on, hang on.
Speaker 2Yeah, one of your little brothers is basically the same age as you, yeah, but a year younger in school so my little, brothers, so you take them trick-or-treating yeah come on, little brothers, put on your hoods and let's go trick or treat. No, I think I mean at what point I think it was like 15 or 16 where you're just like, no, I'm done right, I got a job. I could just go buy a bag of candy, like what the fuck am I doing?
Speaker 5well, if you're alone it's sad. If you're with friends, it's sad. If you're with friends, it's fun Because nobody they're going to call the cops on you If you're alone, with a mask and plain clothes with a pillowcase, asking for candy. Give me a candy.
Speaker 4Give me a candy. Give me a goddamn candy.
Speaker 2The real life hack, though, is coming from the chat. Once you have kids, you just steal their candy and they trick-or-treat for you, genius. So you don't have to dress up, you don't have to do anything, you just let them go to the door, and then, when they go to pass out, you start jacking their.
Speaker 2So where's the line that it's not, uh, strong arm robbery? Like when do you cross that line? Right, right, like I knock on the door, hey, I'd like some candy trick-or-treat, or I don't have any candy give me what do you got?
Speaker 3give me your goddamn candy, what you?
Speaker 2got here bitch goddamn limeade. I said give me your goddamn limeade 20 years baby, do you remember your last costume before you went?
Speaker 5uh, rogue, yeah I mean, we, we still trick-or-treat, but we're we'll go to bar.
Speaker 2No one trick-or-treat anymore. We go in costume, but we go to bars no one trick-or-treats anymore.
Speaker 2We go in costume but we go to bars. Okay, hold on. Was the zombie crawl trick-or-treat? Because, essentially, you're walking around everyone's dressed up and you're going bar-to-bar getting drinks. That's the treat, that's our treat, adult treat. I'm going to say that's the last. What I'm saying, like trick-or-treating was zombie crawl. Yeah, I mean, if that counts, then yes, 100%. And I missed the zombie crawl. Oh, me too. I wanted to see I think they were bringing it back and I don't remember where it was and I wanted to say that it was a lot shittier than it used to be, because it used to be huge downtown, oh, or that square in front of the courthouse.
Speaker 2No, the last time we ended was on Houston Street somewhere I don't know.
Speaker 1I ended up at the bar and got felt up by a 40-year-old woman in beach costumes.
Speaker 3It always went to Houston Street.
Speaker 2It always went to the library. Sometimes it met up where that big yellow Penis no, big Bird's penis the thing was, and remember they came with those trucks from Umbrella that one time, yes, no, big Bird's penis Thing was, and remember they came with those trucks from Umbrella that one time, yes. That was the most cool shit of all time.
Speaker 2So just to set the stage. For those of you who may not know, fort Worth had a zombie crawl for many years and it was downtown and you would start in one place Everyone's dressed as zombies. You can either come as just like a normal zombie or you can kind of get fun with it like our buddy noel. He was uh, what was big tex?
Speaker 2because big tex burned down that year so he's a big tech zombie like you could kind of like have some fun with it, the best one. There's two that I think that were the best, and they're both zeus.
Speaker 2One was whenever he was osama bin laden, right after he got shot, and the other one was zombie, mrs doubtfire, because he just kept going around saying hello, yeah yeah, those are great so we would start in one place and then this whole group of like I'm talking, you know, anywhere between one to three hundred zombie people are going like hopping around bars around downtown, all kind of together, um, and we'd start and end at the same spot. Um, I don't remember what like drink specials or anything where we just like having a good time. I think. I don't. I don't think whatever bars knew yeah, bars knew that we were coming and it was like pretty fucking packed, but um one year. So if you're into the game resident evil, there's this uh company, umbrella corporation, that's supposed to like go out there and they're the ones that created the zombies.
Speaker 2Right, but they're also like killing the zombies. I don't know right, but they came out like in in basic. There was like a fucking tank Humvees, there was like actual gunners on top of some of these things they look legit, like it looked like we were actually zombies and for a second I got real scared and then realized that we were.
Speaker 5They're going to kill us.
Speaker 2Yeah, I don't know what's happening, but they look like legit, they look like military. We're all going to die. It was pretty fucking awesome.
Speaker 5Yeah, I guess, post-pandemic I mean, I guess.
Speaker 2I don't know why they haven't done it again. Like I said, I want to look it up. I want to say that it wasn't Stockyards. Maybe Magnolia somewhere did like a mini one recently, and I don't. By the time I saw it, I think it already happened next year.
Speaker 5Let's try to plan a zombie crawl. Dude, we could start.
Speaker 2Yeah, what? What would prevent us from starting it?
Speaker 5we go talk to bars. It was like 10 bucks, right. Yeah, we talk to bars. How many we can, we can plan yeah and then meet final spot. If we did that on Magnolia, that'd be fun.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 5I mean it's the perfect place really to have like a crawl because everything's like on that street, right, you know, or I mean it's not. I don't think it's something we can do on South Main.
Speaker 2No, no, magnolia is going to be the spot. Yeah, the only problem is Magnolia's got a lot of small bars. But I don't think we're going to have hundreds of people.
Speaker 5I don't know. Man Remember those crawls. Those crawls were pretty big.
Speaker 2Yeah, but they happened over time. We're not going to have that big of a crawl.
Speaker 5Look, if we push early, I think we can get a good crowd like that. I love that idea. If we push early, I think we can get a good crowd like that.
Speaker 2I love that idea. I don't see why we couldn't do something like that.
Speaker 5I mean, we got enough time to plan.
Speaker 2We got a year. You know. I'm at the age now where I'm always like man, someone should do that. And I'm like why the fuck don't we just do it Like there's no reason, for we could do anything? You were talking about putting together a music festival the other day like we could literally do anything we want to do. Why the fuck not? We used to cross pretty tiny when we started this.
Speaker 5Our motivation was that that was what we were trying to do right create events and do fun things and meet cool people, yeah and we were doing that right and we still, you know, still do it. I mean cooler people, not to say that everyone that we've whoa, you know, interviewed whoa, we've interviewed a lot of cool people, speaking of which Dustin Massey.
Speaker 2Congratulations on your, your baby that's, um, that was such a what you just said there. You need to apologize to a lot more people. No, in fact, I think in the next episode we're gonna have to have an Javier apology we're due for an apology from you no we're not dude. You say some stupid shit and I think that we're.
Speaker 5It's been a minute, I mean I can say anything about 9-11 now.
Speaker 4The time has passed.
Speaker 2It's been 23 years. I think we're fine. What else did you have, tim? That's all I had with the country music, oh, okay.
Speaker 5While you're talking, I'm working on a prompt right now to give you one song, gotcha. One more song, one javier. What have you been up to this past week, man? Uh, let's see. Uh, of course, art scoggle was, this weekend, a lot of fun. I didn't go um, I was taking care of a cat a lot of fun. Great time didn't show up no, uh, I was taking care of artemis. Artemis had surgery to cut his balls off, and so I didn't want to leave him at home by himself he was fine, though, right I mean, he was loopy.
Speaker 5I.
Speaker 2Well, yeah, because of the drugs, but he was fine though, right.
Speaker 5Yeah, but I mean I love my pets enough to where I will stay and take care of them and watch them.
Speaker 2What did you really do this weekend? That's what I did. You just stared at your cat yeah, for 48 hours.
Speaker 5Yeah, saturday and Sunday. Yeah, that's all, huh, okay, yeah, I didn't do, I was just at home. We had a bye week. I was in play. Yeah, that's true um, watched tammy, finally watched the godfather, and, uh, that was on a sunday, on sunday, but that's it. We just stayed and watched the cat sounds nice yeah, I mean, I look, I I love my pets very much like I you know what are you saying about tim and I?
Speaker 2because I feel like you're saying I'm just saying they're shitty pet owners y'all do not love your pets like you're hearing. This time he's basically calling us shitty pet owners. No, I, I heard that he's like yeah, I agree, yeah, he's right he's not wrong.
Speaker 5Uh, no, um. But I mean, I really didn't. I I really wanted to go to art scowl because there was a lot of stuff I wanted to go by. Did, did, um, um, uh, what's his name? Dustin doesn't have his.
Speaker 2Uh, no, no no, he wasn't there. I hit him up and he was actually out hunting, or or yeah, cleared out hogs at the lease or something like that. So he didn't actually end up even going.
Speaker 4But yeah, I walked.
Art World and Banksy's Influence
Speaker 2Man, it was way longer than it usually is. It was basically all the way to Maine and all the way to Baylor. Like they didn't even set up the stages on both ends of the road, they set them kind of on side streets because the tents went all the way down. It was crazy.
Speaker 5Was it last year, where it also we weren't out there the year before that, Not last year, the year before where it stretched all the way to South Main. That's where the end the last stage was Was it like I mean.
Speaker 2But there was no stage. Yeah, because they were on side streets. But yeah, it was stupid long. And so I remember I mean we walked both sides of it probably twice and I was looking for Dustin both times. I'm like both sides of it probably twice and I was looking for dustin both times like where the fuck is this guy. So finally I was texting him and he was in the stick so he couldn't like text back until the next day because he didn't have service.
Speaker 2But yeah, I was looking for his booth and he didn't have it either and I was upset yeah, I wanted to buy.
Speaker 5I want to buy another picture. You were there.
Speaker 2Yeah, I was there oh cool, I was there. Nice, I went there, okay, okay, I walked, I bought one thing.
Speaker 5Oh, so you didn't fly this time. That's very strange.
Speaker 2I know it's very strange. I was not on my broom like normal. I bought something, though What'd you?
Speaker 4buy.
Speaker 2I bought a hat. I bought a hat from Morgan Mercantile. That was the only shop that I bought. There was a lot of art. Did you see the like? It was almost like screen printed posters and stuff that. There was a couple of artists that had seemed really cool. There was one like with some space stuff.
Speaker 2Oh, yeah, I wanted to buy some of that stuff, but you know, I really don't have the, I don't have the. I don't have the funds to just be frivolously buying art, right, unless it's going to make me money. Okay. So the question is how do I make money by buying art? You buy the right art, but how do you know it's the right art? What if it's not? You spend all your money on this art that you only like, but nobody else likes it, and it just sits in your house and that's it, yeah.
Speaker 5I want to talk about art real quick.
Speaker 2Is that the?
Speaker 5concept of art. Yeah, if you understand the art, then it's between you and the art, the artist also. But you know, you're, you're translating into your own mind it's not meant to be.
Speaker 2I mean, you got to be rich to go for something that's already worth a lot of money.
Speaker 3It's only going to be trying to get a monet I think, it's pretty
Speaker 2no, you haven't.
Speaker 5You lion's act of shit there's a, a documentary bbc's gonna start doing.
Speaker 5I saw the trailer for it today bbc standing for big black cocks okay um, so it's about uh, nepotism, nepo babies and um, mel b, scary spice, her daughter is doing like painting and she's testing to see if, like her art gets more, like hits or like sells quicker because of her relationship with her mom. And so the trailer's like, yeah, there is a nepo baby problem. I want to explore it like I want to see what advantages I have compared to other people and it looks very interesting in itself.
Speaker 2I mean yes absolutely is that?
Speaker 5would you consider that meta?
Speaker 2is that yeah, yeah it's kind of like a meta art. Have you ever seen the documentary? I'm pretty sure it's exit through the gift shop. Um, no, okay, there was two documentaries art documentaries that I watched and were coming out around the same time. I'm pretty sure it was exit through the gift shop. It was a banksy um documentary, but essentially spoiler, I'm going to tell you exactly what happens.
Speaker 2But essentially what happens is there's this, there's this guy that, um, I guess I forgot the whole premise exactly, but essentially they, they, this guy thinks that he could be banksy. He's like I could do that, right, and he started doing like these screen prints and then he just threw like fifty thousand dollars to this art exhibition and so people just assumed he was big because he already had, like this huge fucking thing happening and so, like, he's pouring money into this thing and it becomes huge because people just assume he's good, because he's got this money behind it. Um, and then he just takes off and so essentially, he's selling these prints, which they're unlimited. You know, you could, you could. Essentially, he's selling these prints which they're unlimited. You know what I mean. You could print as many of these prints as you want. Like I don't even think that he had them as like numbered editions or anything like that, and he's selling for hundreds, some thousands of dollars, just making all this fucking money, and he's not even an artist Like he just like I want this on top of that, on top of that Yep, screen, print it, let's this on top of that, on top of that yep screen print it, let's go.
Speaker 2And it was ridiculous, but it was very similar to that where it was initially supposed to be this thought of like anyone could do it, but then he does do it and then he gets all like head, like his head is so big because he's this artist. Now it's pretty wild. Yeah, I, I need to. I need to watch it again I'm gonna check that out.
Speaker 5Yeah, I think just the fact that, uh, what was that? Tim Tim, what's up?
Speaker 2Nothing, I'm listening, I'm just going to chime in whenever you're done.
Speaker 5I love that kind of shit. Well, speaking of Banksy, the whole situation with that frame picture of his that sold at Sotheby's.
Speaker 2Oh, the one that shredded.
Speaker 5And I just think that's the most genius shit. But also they, they were saying that after the fact like it's worth more, like it's worth more after that they're saying that banksy's been named is his name, they got.
Speaker 2His real name is out there. They couldn't just keep it private because he was in some sort of lawsuit is his name ronald goldfarb I don't, I didn't look and see what his actual name is Is it Jay-Z? It's Sean Puffy Cone.
A24 Films and Impromptu Date
Speaker 2Oh shit, so you're saying I'm a fan of Puffy. I think you've always been a fan of Puffy until now. I mean, yeah, so the guy that he created and it is Exit Through the Gift Shop his name was even Mr Brainwash. They're trying to go for the most ridiculous shit and it like actually fucking worked. It's so, and it's a Banksy film, like Banksy put it together.
Speaker 5Really, yeah, wow, it was really really good. I'm going to have to check that out. Yeah, what's it on?
Speaker 2It used to be on Netflix, like early Netflix.
Speaker 4I'm assuming it's still out there for free watching that. We watched casper the other night. How long has it been since you've seen casper the friendly?
Speaker 2ghost, the friendly ghost. Uh, the friendly ghost. Casper, hi, I'm a friendly ghost, I don't know. Like, uh, fucking high school did they make a new one I don't know but the original one's like what? From the 90s?
Speaker 5yeah, 95, so we saw it last night. As a matter of fact, I didn't realize how many cameos it had in it, like quick cameos really yeah, uh, dan akroyd as a ghostbuster was in it nah, yeah he's like who you gonna? He's running out of hours, he's like who you gonna call somebody else and he just keeps running. And uh, clint eastwood's got a cameo, mel gibson's got a cameo, you know, but again it's like quick, is it good?
Speaker 1it's being a cameo.
Speaker 5Mel Gibson's got a cameo, but again it's like quick, is it good? It's being a grown up? Watching Casper, I was like this is it's like this movie was meant for kids, because there's a scene spoiler alert Christina Ricci's dad dies in the movie because he gets drunk and he's sad and he falls into a pit and they have this magic sauce that they put in the machine and the ghost goes in the machine and he comes out. His body's like whatever. And I asked tammy. I was like so wait, there's a dead body at a in this construction hole and the ghost now is.
Speaker 5So is there like two bodies? Is there two bodies like just a dead man, dead man. And now you got this like ghost. What? What do you do? What's? You can't make sense of cash. And she's like that's, this isn't the point of the fucking movie, it's not. You know, adults try to solve, solve this issue. And then, uh, what christy's saying? Uh, devin sawa. I was telling Tammy, I was like it took me. I didn't realize the kid from Final Destination is human. Casper, like whenever he becomes a human for like 20 minutes.
Speaker 2I'm going to have to watch it. It's been so long, it's been 20 plus years.
Speaker 5Another thing I was talking to Tammy about Little Giants. Same kid, devin Sawa Casper, final Destination. Destination is the main kid, not the hot chick. I mean, when we were growing up it was pretty. You know, you had these crushes on these, you know people, but oh, that guy yeah, yeah, yeah and it's just like funny, it's funny nice and also, uh gee, germaine from the mighty ducks isn't casper, I was like it's gee gee, germain, and you know timmy's like who's like oh yeah, no one else.
Speaker 2So, tim, what'd you do this weekend? I went to, uh, I went to arts goggle okay and honestly, that's about it.
Speaker 2So I'll tell you I worked friday and saturday or something, right? Yeah, dude, I'm, I'm just working a bunch. Um, that's why the episode's been getting dropped kind of late. Yeah, sorry, everyone, tim's dropping the ball yet again. Yeah, it's just because I'm trying to work. This is a busy time of the year for me, that's what you said. In January, february, that's the other busy time because that's the Stock Show Rodeo. So this is all football season stuff going on right now. So I'm doing a lot of the high school football games, working, working, working that, and then, uh, you know, stock show rodeo come. Stock show rodeo comes, uh, comes to town, and so I do that as well. So it's just, you know busy times, but you and mtm baby making that money, that's what I say I've always been saying that.
Speaker 3You've been saying that money very long time.
Speaker 2So I um after arts goggle we were. We were trying to figure out where we're gonna eat it and we had talked about maybe we'll eat somewhere on Magnolia. No, we're not going to do that. We're going to end up having to wait forever.
Speaker 3Right.
Speaker 2Yeah, I mean there's just tons of people around. So I'm sitting there trying to go through. Where are we going to go? Where are we going to go? So I was originally going to go to the woodshed.
Speaker 5I don't know if you've been went in the spring this year.
Speaker 2Yeah. So I mean it was nice out that day on Arts Goggle Day, and so we drove over there and packed I mean cars lined down the street all going to the woodshed. So we skipped that and we went to an old favorite.
Speaker 3Charleston.
Speaker 2Griff's. Oh, went to Charleston's Got a prime rib yeah.
Speaker 3Oh, fuck griffs.
Kid Cudi Movie Discussion
Speaker 2oh, went to charleston's, got a prime rib yeah, that's, that's javier and tammy's favorite thing to do. That's their spot. So what do I do? I sent it. I sent a picture to javier and tammy and said this could be us, but you'll, but you'd be playing. Um, it was fantastic, as always. Uh drink. I had a. I had this uh gin drink. That was pretty tasty. It kind of hit the spot after being outside all day.
Speaker 3Yeah.
Speaker 2It was nice, light and refreshing, so it was good, it was fun, just to kind of it was like an impromptu date.
Speaker 3Nice.
Speaker 2We went to Art's Goggle and then, after Art's Goggle, we went and had dinner and then we came home and we watched have you seen the A24 movie X no, okay. Or Max the a24 movie x no, okay. Or maxine no. Or pearl I've seen them pop up a lot but no, I've not seen any of those holy crap. Okay, so you know you know, about a24, right? Yeah they're.
Speaker 5They're known for their, their yeah, they did civil war they did civil war they did um uh midsummer um any art house type movie that's been released in the past, like six years, has been A24. A24.
Speaker 2Yeah, the one before that that I watched was Green Room, which is one of Chase's favorite movies.
Speaker 3Which one?
Speaker 2Green Room.
Speaker 5Showgirls Okay.
Speaker 2Showgirls yeah, that one's scary. X isn't scary, maxine's not scary, but it is fucked.
Speaker 5Kid Cudi's in X right.
Speaker 2I don't think Tim knows what Kid Cudi looks like. You have no idea. I know who Kid Cudi is. I couldn't tell you what he does. He's a kid and he cuddies a lot.
Speaker 5He'd be in that Cudi baby. I know he's a musician right yeah, producer Rapper.
Speaker 1He produces too. I thought he produced a little bit.
Speaker 2Maybe I don't know he could be in that. Uh, I would recommend watching it though. So it's x, then pearl, then maxine. Okay, pearl's supposed to be the prequel to x and then maxine is just the sequel, basically, to x, but they released it in that order and I ended up watching x, then maxine and then I'm gonna watch pearl, but it dude, it's, it's fucked up. It is a fucked up movie like gory, fucked up gory, gory, and then the story is fucked up and yes, and x and maxine I did see.
Speaker 5Uh, somebody posted the end credits to pearl and it's just her smiling and holding that smile as the credits are rolling. That's creepy and then she's like like a tear.
Speaker 2So I'm not going to give away like everything about x, but it's about um. So these girls are strippers in texas, uh, down in houston, and there's a guy that I think is like the he's like the manager of the strip club or whatever, but he wants to make a movie, you know, an adult movie, yeah, and they're gonna be adult actresses and so instead, of it's got jenna ortega yeah, instead of doing the film um in houston, in that county where, like they'd be hit with all these charges and stuff, they decide they're gonna go out to the middle of nowhere.
Speaker 2He had already pre-arranged through this you know this guy who owned this bunkhouse. It's gonna be like 30 a night kind of thing. So he's gonna rent this bunkhouse and they're gonna shoot on the farm, unbeknownst to the people who own the the place, and it just spirals completely out of control from there black guy right the guy that owns the place yeah, no, no.
Speaker 5The guy the manager no, no, no okay I was gonna say that's kid cuddy the black guy okay, so the black guy's kid cuddy the movie?
Speaker 2okay, yeah, he's one. He's one of the actors. He's one of the porn actors. He's in the movie. Okay, yeah, he's one of the porn actors. He's not the manager. Sounds about right, dude. He walks up to the door. There's a scene where he walks up to the door because the owner of the farm is looking for his wife and he walks up to the door and he just opens the door nude and you're talking like. He's got a hammer Hanging down to the knee.
Speaker 4Hell yeah.
Speaker 2I mean, all you see is a silhouette. I don't know if that Hell yeah, baby, I don't know if that was real or not, but he be cutty, you know. Good on him. Yeah, good on him. Caught me off guard. Was not expecting that, was like okay, no, it's a good movie Again. It's really fucked up, though, so we've been trying to watch some of the scary movies Watched Alien, romulus.
Speaker 5How was that?
Speaker 2I enjoyed it. It's not the best Alien. I think Jesse's a fan of the second one Aliens. I like the first one. Aliens is really good but it's decent. It kind of plays a little homage back to prometheus a little bit and um, it steps back in like the old, one of the old ships from aliens. So you have like some of that retro vibe. That's good. It's worth a watch if you like the franchise did you ever watch prey?
Speaker 2yes, so I've seen, I've seen pretty much, I think, all the alien movies alien alien versus predator, all the predator movies um prometheus, and then, yeah, I've seen prey so like when, when is it?
Speaker 5when do you start watching those scary movies? Because I know everybody feels different about like halloween, situations like when do you start putting out decorations, when do you start getting pumpkins?
Speaker 2I like to watch horror movies year round. Jesse's not a big horror movie fan and so and then I don't end up watching them really that often. But halloween I kind of that's her compromise she starts to watch them yeah and so usually right around, you know, the first week of october, we kind of kick it off okay now we start putting out fall decorations. Not how? Not halloween stuff?
Speaker 5she's putting out fall, but your house smells lovely by the way. I walked in.
Speaker 2I'm like man, this smells really nice. That's a carpet man. Tiktok shop.
Speaker 4Yeah, man, tiktok shop has been ruining my life.
Speaker 2It got me again. I got the Echo Beaters because you know Right, echo Beaners, echo Beaners.
Speaker 1Yeah, he told us about this last week Beaters. Oh yeah.
Speaker 2They're wife lovers is what they call them, because they don't call them wife beaters anymore. Yeah, so I've got those those little men's shapewear action going on, and then cool this uh carpet powder stuff that you put down. It's supposed to make your house smell like a million bucks, and it does smell really good so I want to get into this after we're done.
Speaker 2We're talking about what we did, because that it's a really I've been buying a lot of stuff on tiktok shop like a lot I bought ghost energy drink off there because they were running some sort of special if you you haven't.
Speaker 1Do you like grape?
Speaker 2soda. Yeah sure You've got to get the ghost Welch's flavor, if you can find it. It tastes like grape soda. It's delicious. Get it. I found it on TikTok shop. If you don't get it. You love Bin Laden, Y'all buy way too much shit on TikTok shop.
Speaker 5Man, I need to put myself on a budget.
Speaker 2I've literally never purchased anything off TikTok. Oh really no.
Speaker 5Goddamn. Anyways, what else did you do I?
Speaker 2mean, that's pretty much it.
Speaker 5Okay, chad how was your week and how was the wrestling? The wrestling was great, great uh, so you ended up going. Oh good for you, didn't?
Speaker 2stay for the entire thing? Uh, because we were hungry and we hadn't eaten. So, uh, g met me up there. We drank some beers. Uh, watched, um a handful of the matches it was. It was great, pretty good show out. Um, man, it was loud too. I mean, I guess it's because the metal awning outside just kind of like resonate some of that sound off the you know, uh, whatever ground. Yeah, but it was so loud and some of those hits just sounded. Where do they? Where do they do it at smart house, out out back, like where they have musicians like you know that big awning?
Speaker 2area yeah they had it out there a lot of people, a lot of fun. Uh, yeah, it was a good time went there, went back to los guapos, um, I haven't been yet.
Speaker 1No, no, no, I haven't been yet so good.
Speaker 2I think they have the best, uh, barria tacos in fort worth probably, and I love calisiense and I know she's still doing some pop-ups. But man, these tacos are like thick. They're not just like cheese, a little bit of meat. These are meaty fucking tacos. And then the consomme is really really like spiced perfectly and they do like lamb or beef. So this place is connected with was Cali Science.
Speaker 5No, it was Guapo. Oh okay, Guapo, right, I'm just saying like no it was connected with Mariachi at one point.
Speaker 3Oh, okay, so remember when we went to Mariachi.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 1So they did the thing on.
Speaker 2Canton Buoy. He continued to take over the gas station.
Speaker 5He was actually going to do something else, but it was his own thing.
Speaker 2And then he did something. Yeah, oh, okay. Gotcha he just continued with the gas station, and then this is just now him doing his own brick and mortar. Yeah yeah, the food's great. I mean he's already established. It's right next door to Velvet Taco. It was still pretty packed. They got a nice little patio on the back because it used to be barbecue or something. I never went there, well because it was fanboys.
Speaker 5It used to be opahs too, right yeah, but they put a patio area in the back with a TV because they were showing sports and stuff like that. But it looks nice, do you think it's going?
Speaker 2to take business away from Velvet.
Speaker 1I hope so.
Speaker 2I really hope so. Look, I love Velvet Taco, I think for what it is it's good. It's like a Torchy's or something like that. It's fine but, yes, absolutely Like they had. The whole patio was filled with people Really and inside was empty because everyone was like hanging on the patio, but the patio was completely full. So what if Velvet's, just like this location, is not good for us anymore? He takes over that spot too, breaks down the wall, opens up, has a nice big restaurant there's no wall there's a parking lot.
Speaker 2That's oh, is it okay? I thought they were right next to each other. Yeah, so it's like uh, what is the bar is abby pub abby pub abby pub uh los guapos parking lot oh okay yeah, I'm falling, yeah, yeah, I got, um, yeah, so we went there and then we went over to hatter and kind of finished the night there. Um, the next day went to arts goggle, walked it for hours. It was pretty, pretty hot.
Speaker 1What time did you go?
Speaker 2late. Yeah, we got there around um close like five. Yeah, we got there around like two or three. I think we left around six or so. Um, we started off at gustos surprise I didn't see you yeah, me too.
Speaker 2I mean, um, there was not that many people there. There's a fucked up people there. There was a fuck ton of people there Went to Gusto's Amazing, as always. Got to see those guys and then a lot of people were hanging out at Gusto's. It was kind of nice. Everyone's like, hey, congratulations on the engagement. I'm like, oh shit, cool, Appreciate you. But it was, yeah, it was nice. And then we went to and if and if you haven't been to Gusto's still think it's one of the best burgers, if not the best burger, in Fort Worth. We had them on what is it about? Like eight, nine, ten episodes ago, like early summer and Johnny's fantastic and it was great. But yeah, the Gusto's burger, Gusto style tots, and then their jalapeno poppers are fucking great.
Speaker 5I still haven't had their jalapeno poppers. Oh man, they're really good and they got this like the bacon's, got like the. It's like honey, the honey dip that they have.
Speaker 2Yeah, Instead of getting the ranch.
Speaker 5Yeah, yeah, it's like a yeah, it's a sweet dip, yeah but it tastes like you know how fresh honey has got like a gritty kind of feel. It's perfect. I hear they had a menu for arts. Go like a fast order menu.
Speaker 2A lot of the restaurants were doing that. Yeah, um, they did that last year, like we went and ate at um shaw's. Yeah, and they had like four like four or five items and that was it. Yeah, johnny's out there slinging burgers on the patio and so you could walk up, pay for it and go. Yeah, we want to sit inside and hang out because it was hotter than shit. We just kind of want a little bit of ac action. But uh, yeah, they were.
Speaker 5They were slinging burgers like nobody's business there was a lot of love on reddit for uh gustos, like they were saying like man, people were like man. I spent like 24 bucks on pretzel bites and then somebody commented well, you could have gotten two burgers, two bags of chips and two drinks for 24 bucks yeah you could have like, instead of getting tots at the goddamn you just had to walk a little bit further down walk a little further to save a lot more you know, but um, I'm really glad there we went me and sammy went a couple weeks ago whenever she cut my hair and um, I ran into jonathan over there, lovely awesome
Speaker 2man, I can't speak any other, that might be the, that might be where I grab something, uh, sometime this weekend, if I have, if I ever have a chance, I go to gustos like if it, if it's me alone and I'm just gonna sit real quick and eat a burger.
Speaker 5Gustos is where it's.
Speaker 2I just want to say that this episode is not sponsored by gustos we just like it that much um, because I mean, it honestly sounds like we're doing like a mid-roll right now for Gusto's and we definitely aren't.
Speaker 2We're just a big fan of the establishment and the people there so yeah, from the chat, gusto's hits the g-spot it sure does, baby so, yeah, we went to Gusto's uh walked around, saw some of the musicians, saw Cassandra um saw Tammy uh in front of the shop um saw Andrew Fort Worth Roops. He had like a really nice little setup and he had some announcements and things like that going off. So that was really neat. Saw some artists end up buying two things. Sarah found this really cool. Like there was. There was these girls that were making like like band shirts, you know, like they not, yeah, no, I got you.
Speaker 2You know like the fight him at the thrift shop or whatever and they're cutting them and putting them on like um plaid shirts and then they do some like acid wash to it or like okay, they were making it right there no, but they had made them all like and uh, sarish fell in love with this tool one, of course, and it looked great, it was cool. And then I found this one.
Speaker 2There was this guy that was doing a lot of like wood art but, like, some of them look like spirals, and they were kind of like I don't know, they were crazy burned wood or like chiseled wood it was just like it's like he took a shit ton of like really thin wood and put it on top of each other as layered and so it's very like contoured and and yeah, it was really neat and so got a little piece from him, which is really neat. Cool. Saw Jonah Copeland.
Speaker 5Oh, wow. How's he doing? He's doing well. Has he not aged? Because it seems like he's a vampire? He is a vampire. It was midday, but he is a vampire.
Speaker 2He's doing great. Did y'all sing about snakes? No, how they're coming to get your mind.
Speaker 5I band together, have you heard of a band called bleeding lightly. Bleeding lightly I mean leading blindly you suck at shit uh yeah, and then g met up with us and we hung out.
Speaker 2But that was better, that's a good band name, bleeding lightly bleeding blindly was a fantastic name for a band. Just you know it was.
Speaker 2Yeah, I mean, I'm just saying bleeding lightly is pretty good for your type of music yeah, new, bleeding lightly yes we were gonna go back, like we we went home and we were gonna because we had to let the dogs out and we're gonna go back out because I wanted to go to, um, ernie's thing at tulips or loadout um, and so that was a plan. But by the time we got home we were like fucking exhausted. Yeah, they were like, all right, let's just order pizza and not go back dude.
Speaker 5I mean the walking in the heat is kind of just it wears on you, especially being old men, that we are, that's how it was at ACL.
Speaker 2We worked through the whole day. I felt like we worked the whole day right.
Speaker 1We walked like seven miles. At the end of the day, you're just like tired, yeah, so we were done and I think that was about it.
Speaker 2I'm sure we did some stuff Sunday, but yeah, it was fun, it was a good weekend. There is something I didn't mention. So on the 10th you did bleed lightly, I did bleed lightly. On the 10th I actually went to Tim.
Speaker 5I think you had your period I did.
Speaker 2I went to a show by myself. I don't normally go to concerts by myself I went to a concert by myself lance wasn't able to. He had to go. You know deal with stuff over in california and so I went to see um ozone ozone.
Speaker 2Um, they opened up for, um, this band called dying wish. Dying wish was the headliner. Um, I'm gonna tell you this, every single band that got up they like mentioned like give it up for you know, give it up for this band, give it up for this band, whatever. And then every single one was like I mean, it was like they kicked it up a notch just for Ozone when they started talking about Ozone. So Fort Worth's very own Making Ways, joe Kelly, kelly's Onion Burgers, front man for a hardcore band, ozone Fort Worth.
Speaker 1How many times have you seen ozone?
Speaker 3no, uh man quite a few times, probably like five or six times yeah, here recently.
Speaker 2I mean I'd seen them previously, you know a few years ago, um, but really been seeing them a lot more and they're just they keep getting better and they keep uh, you know, going up there. But yeah, I drove to dallas and went by myself, which was way out of my comfort zone. Yeah, I don't normally do that.
Speaker 5That's good. It's always good. It's like whenever it had to be like maybe 15 years ago. I was in a point in my life where I was very sad and depressed and I would go to Olive Garden by myself, and so I'd go every day.
Speaker 2Every day.
Speaker 5Every day and I'd go and I'd order the same thing every day, every day, and I'd go and I'd order the same thing. And I wondered I'm like, are these waitresses? Do they think I'm just gonna?
Speaker 2kill myself, because was there a cute waitress there? No, was there a cute waitress there?
Speaker 5no no, if there was, and she would probably would have been like were you trying to make some girls, your family there at olive? Garden. Yes, because when you're there, your family all right.
Speaker 2So let me ask you were you ordering the the tour of Italy every time? No, I just buttered noodles.
Speaker 5Shit the fuck. Buttered noodles and a side of salad.
Speaker 2Can I tell you something Honestly? I've been to Olive Garden many times over the years it hits but I've only ever ordered pasta. Maybe three times, Say I've been 40 times.
Speaker 5I think I've only ordered pasta. What do you order, kids?
Speaker 2meal burger.
Speaker 5I do the soup and salad almost every fucking time so let's, let's, let's say that's not, that's a good fucking let's talk about our our order at at olive garden real quick.
Speaker 4Well hold on, because you made pasta. Yeah, speaking of pasta by the way.
Speaker 2Yeah, you made pasta, that's what I did yeah, from the chat. Thanks for the reminder. I had had my parents over and we made some pasta from scratch. I used the last bit of the Parmesan that I got from Italy.
Speaker 5Oh nice.
Speaker 2And some prosciutto.
Speaker 1You're doing too much, man, it was good.
Speaker 2Let me ask you though so we got your order from whatever the pasta place is and I can make a zuppa toscana exactly like Olive Garden, and it is also Alright. Whenever you do this, what's your order? I feel like you're appropriating Italian culture, right now Italian.
Speaker 1I don't know how I feel about this.
Speaker 2Okay, at least I said gobble-goo. This motherfucker said gobble-goo more than anybody right now he's closer to being Italian than you are. That's true Just because he's brownish.
Speaker 5You can't say that my order it's usually baked ziti, five cheese baked ziti al formo.
Speaker 2I like how you look so concerned when you said that yeah baked ziti.
Speaker 1That's my order. Yeah, really yeah usually baked ziti.
Speaker 2Every once in a while I feel a little fettuccine action. Yeah, a little fettuccine action. Yeah, a little fettuccine, alfredo.
Speaker 5Whenever I would go by myself, I would get linguine with marinara sauce.
Speaker 2How many breadsticks were you eating at this time?
Speaker 5Fuck me, I was eating like six, six and I'd eat the whole salad. He's not sad.
Speaker 2He's bulking. Yeah, it's bulking season.
Speaker 5This is my not sad. He's bulking. Yeah, it's bulking season, my bulking phase right now yeah, but it's good, dude, like I think we were me and tammy were talking about what we're gonna eat one time and I made a joke olive garden and she's like okay people shit all over like corporate chain restaurants a lot.
Speaker 2I was telling jesse the other day he's like I kind of want to, I kind of want to go cheesecake factory oh, I'm not gonna lie one place that is constantly solid and I never go. I think I've been to the one. How long has it been in Fort Worth Like?
Speaker 510 years no it's not, there's no way.
Speaker 4The one downtown yeah.
Speaker 2It's gone.
Speaker 4I don't think it's been there.
Speaker 5There's no way. The one across the crosswalk, no I out. If that, I've probably been there like three times and every time it is amazing Tammy's never gone.
Speaker 2How they have a hundred items on a menu beats me what's crazy though, and I think this is the reason it prevents me from going every item on that menu $20 shows the calories and there's not a single one that is less than your full days a lot they're all weak because because, it's like a. It's a plate.
Speaker 1You know the size of like you know, and then you're gonna get the 1300 calorie cheesecake, because why the fuck not?
Speaker 5yeah, and then you're gonna die okay, so I don't go to cheese, so confirm, yes, it's still there.
Speaker 2Thank you, jamie yeah, I knew it was still there um what's your order.
Speaker 5So you, you do order, yeah I do the baked ziti.
Speaker 2That's usually what I get, and chad, you just order the five cheese.
Speaker 5Yeah, I do the baked ziti, that's usually what I get and Chad you just get the soup and salad.
Speaker 2Yeah, and I'll add some cheese to it. I tell him when to stop and a lot of times I just don't. Yeah, zuppa to scanna and what's the other one.
Speaker 3He's sitting there the whole meal.
Speaker 2He's like, sir, I'd like to I have more cheese. The chicken or something in gnocchi, and then the Zuppa Toscana. Zuppa Toscana is the only one I go for.
Speaker 3Oh, they're so good, I dip my bread in it, of course. Yeah, it's unlimited bread.
Speaker 2I don't do the red one. What's a red one? I don't know, I've never fucking got it. It's like shit sounds too much like give me the creamy soups and that sounds too much like uh, women's problems god damn it, we're gonna be that podcast we hate, women, women don't, you don't like the red soup because it's called minestrone and it reminds you of female problems yeah jesus christ please clip that, clip that wow okay, all right, all right, ch up with. Why do you look?
Speaker 5like Michael Keaton in Birdman. That's what it is. That's what it is. Yeah, I can see it. That's the goatee. Why the goatee? Look at the camera. Look into the camera. Look at that he looks like Michael Keaton. We're going to edit it.
Speaker 2put side by side of Birdman, I had to shave my beard. I got to do it tonight too. I had to grow my beard out. Then I had to shave it because I had to work on an actual ambulance and all that stuff.
Speaker 5Christy, it's pasta and veggies, not blood. Herbie said he man, woman haters club.
Speaker 2I'm afraid it's going to encourage the bears to come.
Speaker 4Not the bears. Did you hear that, Ron the bears?
Speaker 2I had to shave. I was just like I've never done this, and so I did the goatee. And then one of my friends at work Do you think you'll do it again.
Speaker 2Do you think I'll do it again? No, I'm going to go back to the mustache. Yeah, good call. But she pulls up this picture from it's like some animated I can't remember what movie. It is One of the Pixar movies. Movie is one of the pixar movies. Uh uh, toy story, but one of the other toy stories. There's a character I was wearing like this red shirt at work and I had a black undershirt and it's goatee and she's like pulls this up and I'm like, fuck you so yeah it's going.
Speaker 2It's going away tonight, okay, good good, um, you had something.
Speaker 5Yeah, you had something.
Speaker 2No, tim, you had a gas thing, and then we can like okay I want to get into that before we get into halloween? Sure, let me ask, let me ask you all this question.
Speaker 5Okay, when you go to get gas, you pay attention how much you're paying yes, but only because I had to put my phone number in for my uh discount but you're only getting gas at where 7-eleven yeah, so you're 7-eleven guy, okay, ch-eleven, yeah, so you're a 7-Eleven guy.
Speaker 2Okay, chad, I couldn't remember. I mean, I've looked at it as I'm driving down the highway. I'm like, oh, $359, whatever it is.
Speaker 1I was like, oh, that's a lot $259. $259, that seems low $359
Speaker 5is a lot.
Speaker 2That's like California prices. Yeah, so I drove by the other day. I remember driving by the other day and this is such an old person thing to do, but I drove past a QT I can't remember which one it was and I was like oh, 262. I should text Jessie and let her know the gas has come down. I want to go fill your car up with some gas. What the fuck is happening to me, dude? I look at gas prices when I'm driving past a gas station because they're the big ass signs, but when I go to a gas station to pump gas, I have no idea right and I just happen to look this time and it's like it was 249 but correct.
Speaker 2I don't give a shit either, because you need it yeah, it's something you need. You're like, well, I just gotta get fucked with this one you don't't have an option. Yeah, it's like going to the store and buying toilet paper, right, we have a certain brand. We get the Charmin Ultra soft. We don't need the strong. Our poops aren't that bad. Okay, we just get the soft right. You want the softness?
Speaker 5It's like a marker. You just keep wiping and wiping and it's just still there, Still there.
Speaker 2But if it's soft, it doesn't make you raw, so it's much better, anyways, but I don't ever think about the price of that either. Right, because it's something I need. So I've come to realize at this point in my life that if it's stuff that I have to need, then I'm just like it is what it is, right. But what about things that you don't need? Yeah, I look at the prices all the time for that. What about streaming services? Every time you get an email that's like, hey, we're having to go up. The new price is this. I'm like well, I don't even remember what the old price was.
Speaker 3I just canceled.
Speaker 2Netflix. Really, yeah, I'm just like you know what. And then they dropped a couple of shows apparently that are really good just recently and I'm like a month and then drop it again. Right like that's. If I was efficient enough, like I would just use my streaming services when I needed them, you know. I mean like maybe I'll get stars once a year to like watch and catch up on whatever the fuck shows on powers.
Speaker 2He watches power right, I get it that I don't know. But I mean, I'm just, I want to be able to scroll. I can see them catching on at some point, be like oh this motherfucker, so for you it's 60 bucks. Look, they put a subscription on it. You can pay for it when you want to. You can cancel it when you want to.
Speaker 4Yeah, you can I don't think we have disney either.
Speaker 2I think we got rid of disney I did the disney hulu espn thing get on rocket money.
Speaker 5Download rocket money oh it'll give you a list of what you have. I found out I was paying for two um two disney pluses you sound just like the ad.
Speaker 2This is what they say on the ad, but it's true, because I got it, I've got it.
Speaker 5I've got it too I was paying for two disney pluses. I was paying for two dozen uh accounts.
Speaker 2I watched this commercial and I'm like no one's stupid enough to pay for two disney plus it's pronounced.
Speaker 5It's pronounced dozen, dozen, yeah, dozen so he was paying for two dozen accounts so I I fucked up and like I I got mad because it took 230 out of my account and I don't get on that fucking. I don't watch that many fights to like justify that.
Speaker 2So I'm like, hey, fix this shit yeah, I mean I've used them and they negotiated my at&t bill. They negotiate like your bill and get you. Get you a better, better bill somehow I don't know how that works. I don't know if it's like some live person calls or they just have like some form. They send it's magic.
Speaker 5It really is man, I wish we had a sponsorship with rocket money, that it breaks down like things that you subscribe to that, but do you?
Speaker 2pay a subscription for rocket money.
Speaker 5I do, and it tells you it tells you like another fucking subscription, but it breaks down. Like you can budget, you can um, you know separate, you know stuff for tax information, like you can classify yeah, I mean it's, it's pretty cool, it's really good.
Speaker 2Yeah, my chase credit card does that. Anyway, it just kind of like shows you your spending summary.
Speaker 5Yeah, well, I mean bank of america does the same thing too, but I just yeah but does it negotiate, uh, your bills and stuff?
Speaker 2no, I can cancel on uh rocket yeah, oh really, rocket rocket manson, rocket rocket. I canceled stitch fix.
Speaker 5I canceled, um what else?
Speaker 2Wait, how long have you been using Stitch Fix?
Speaker 5For like a year and a half You've been like actually. And I've only kept one thing and the other. You're not their target demographic. I kept one thing and then two other things. I told them that it was stolen, so I kept those.
Speaker 2You heard it here we got them Scamming baby. Stitch Fix we those, you heard it here we got him scamming. We got him. This is the long con and we fucking got him. Boys, come on in. Yeah, stitch, fix police I just I just bring that up because I I truly like the only thing, like so. I've been eyeing this uh sound bar, yeah, for a while and it's like it's a dolby atmos and all that stuff I kind of want to get it, but it it's like 500 bucks.
Speaker 4And I just can't, you cannot you cannot If you're watching a movie.
Speaker 5Two things you can't skimp on Popcorn Candy, that's it.
Speaker 2What the fuck does that have to do with?
Speaker 5his speaker.
Speaker 2He's actually got a point, though you can't skip on the candy or the popcorn.
Speaker 5You know, fuck the speaker.
Speaker 2You can just get your phone and just put it up to your ear. Candy and popcorn, baby candy and popcorn. I thought you're gonna go down this trail of like how perfect sound needs to be for a good movie. No, no, just candy watching interstellar.
Speaker 5You don't need those little ticks that you know come on, you don't need that.
Speaker 2You have to have good sound, hell, no how the air subscription gold.
Speaker 5He signs up for everything and forgets. That's true. That's absolutely true. I don't know how many people use my hulu account like he is the target demographic for literally anything that has a subscription and tiktok shop.
Speaker 3I've only bought a couple things do you know what rocket?
Speaker 2money is perfect for you. Do you know what itunes?
Speaker 5matches. Do you know what itunes matches? No, it's where it gets all your songs from your computer or your, your cloud and it puts it on your phone. I love that. Has all the mixtapes that I downloaded from like 20 years ago into my phone and I love it really yes do you subscribe to it?
Speaker 2yeah, do you have to continue to?
Speaker 5subscribe. Yes, and I I'm more than welcome. I will definitely, because I obviously I do the um um.
Speaker 2Yeah, when it does all the things Right. That's what I do.
Speaker 5And my family's in that.
Speaker 2Same.
Speaker 5And so iTunes Match, because Apple Music comes with the Apple One. But iTunes Match is all the songs that you have on your computer, that you've had for like ever On the cloud. Streams it to my phone. I love it on the cloud. Streams it to my phone. I love it like I forget of songs that I have on there because I have so many that I, I don't even worry about it. I couldn't, I couldn't live without that. That's why, that's.
Speaker 5It just tells me what I have, that I that I remember that I have, and then I use more, use more of like. I mean apple's doing a thing now where you can't interact with your subscriptions. If you do it on your phone, like they're going to take that away, you're not going to be able to do that anymore. So if you sign up on the phone, you can't go to the app or you can't go on the website and cancel from there. You got to do it on your phone.
Speaker 2That's going to change, I guarantee you, because there's like a law that recently was passed that it's supposed to be like a one-click cancel for any streaming service any subscription service. So they're going to make it easier, because it's kind of ridiculous that it's becoming more difficult to cancel shit when it's so easy to start it you know yeah, I mean going to LA Fitness.
Speaker 5You have to mail in some shit to cancel the fucking thing. Oh, I remember that was a pain in the ass, it was a motherfucker motherfucker.
Speaker 2Yeah, and if you, if you don't, and you just, uh, try to.
Speaker 5So I tried to just get a new bank card yeah and somehow they still figured out how to shut up pull money out of my account um, but yeah, I think all that stuff that you know because, honestly, if you have an iphone, it makes it easier too. If you sign up for stuff, it'll tell you a breakdown of what you're paying for on there too, and so you know you're talking about using the subscriptions as you want.
Speaker 2Yeah, so I saw the other day. So people, you know the whole thing with like Ozempic and Megalitude or whatever.
Speaker 4And yeah, there you go, megalitude Schmegma.
Speaker 2Whatever that shit's called. So what people are doing is going on Groupon and you can bounce from place to place and like they'll have like semi-glutide for 40 bucks, introductory price for four, four months yeah and you just cancel at the two month mark. You still get your four month stuff and you subscribe to a new one right around that time. So then by the time you're out, you've got the new one coming in and the people are just bouncing and getting it for like 30, 40, 50 bucks.
Speaker 5Yeah, that makes sense hey look, rich people get this shit fucking cheap and easy like the regular average man.
Speaker 2All right, I feel like we went on long enough for that stuff. Chad, you had some things. Well, halloween is next week, right, and so we will be live again, but this is our pre-Halloween show. That's crazy it's next week, this month, just fucking flew by man. This year's flying by, you're not wrong. It's kind of ridiculous, it's kind of rude. Actually is what I think you were wanting to say, and I 100% agree with you. All right, so Halloween, urban legends.
Speaker 4Tell us more.
Speaker 2Are there any Halloween urban legends that you've heard of?
Speaker 5Headless Horseman. Well, I don't think that the man in the Iron Mask.
Speaker 2Okay, let's think about like. You drive to the bridge and you park your car. And you put your thing in neutral, and then the hands come and push the car. Oh the Marfa, that's the one that pops into my head.
Speaker 1That's a good one. Is that the Marfa Lights? That's a really good one.
Speaker 2Is that the Marthalites?
Speaker 1That's a really good one.
Speaker 2No, that's not the Marthalites, the screaming bridge where you go over there and you hear people screaming Like here's one, okay.
Speaker 3Razor blades and Halloween candy. Oh okay, we'll talk about this.
Speaker 2Yeah, razor blades and Halloween candy.
Speaker 3Or like the drugs, the drugs Like people handing out their narcotics.
Speaker 2So do you think that there were ever razor blades in Halloween candy?
Speaker 5There was. There was at one point, like in the 70s, and it was very scarce, like one person was doing it and like apples and shit like that.
Speaker 2I don't believe so I think that it was fake. I think someone faked it and it wasn't actually so you're right, this happened between the 70s and 80s. This is when it was like kind of become popular and it is a myth, so it while there has been some like isolated incidents, most claims were found to be hoaxes or misunderstandings, so no, not. I remember hearing people saying they were putting drops of acid on pay phones so whatever halloween thing or so whatever you like dial the phone.
Speaker 2You put the phone up to the ear and all of a sudden it's an octopus and you're just freaking out I'm on the moon? What about the belief that strangers were giving out poison laced drugs? Yeah, I don't believe that either or poison laced uh candy to trick-or-treaters no, I mean, wasn't there, uh, somebody doing that?
Speaker 5wasn't there somebody you?
Speaker 2just to think that all of these are correct you think they're all true yes no, so this is another false one. Uh, between the 60s and 70s there's no evidence of widespread poisoning of candy by strangers however there was a tragic case in 1974 where a father poisoned his own son's candy to collect life insurance. Now that I believe, but this was like an isolated and personal crime, not the work of strangers yeah, poisoning candy.
Speaker 2Um, this one's weird. I I've not. I don't think I've heard of this one. It's called the halloween, not the work of strangers. Yeah, poisoned candy this one's weird. I don't think I've heard of this one. It's called the Halloween. Sadist no, anybody Like Satanist Sadist.
Speaker 3Sadist, sadist.
Speaker 2Well, sadist is right, sadist is right 80s and 90s, stories circulated about a sadistic person who would dress as a monster and abduct or harm children on Halloween night. I believe that could be real. Okay, it's false. That didn't really happen. I mean, it sounds like something that could happen, okay, so, okay, let's do this one A murdered man as a Halloween prop yeah, maybe, yeah, yeah, so maybe.
Speaker 2Yeah, yeah Between the 90s and 2000s, there was a legend A Halloween decoration turns out to be a real dead body. Well True, In several instances real bodies have been mistaken for Halloween decorations, but in 2005, a woman in Delaware hung herself from a tree and for hours people passed by thinking it was a Halloween.
Speaker 4Oh my.
Speaker 2God, have you seen the? Have you seen where people have recreated the stranger things, where the girl she's up in the sky, yeah. I mean I could. People were calling and saying like, oh my gosh, there's somebody hanging there Right, so there's some crazy lady also. In 2014, a man in california who had been dead for several days was mistaken for a decoration after being left on the front porch during halloween season I could see, I could believe that yeah don't die in october because you're screwed.
Speaker 2Yeah, it's a prank. If you tragically die, people are just gonna think you're a decor we should get some, um, dead people.
Speaker 2Yeah, we should get some dead people. We should go get some mannequin legs and put them in the bushes or something Upside down. Yeah, just freak people out. So this one popped up, and it's funny because I don't know, do you all know any horror stories? Or if you were around the campfire, do you have a scary story that you tell? Yeah, I talk about how the government's taking all your money and your taxes. It's quite, it's quite frightening. No, so there was there's only once, and I remember who told me this scary story. But essentially, the scariest story goes uh, and it's funny that it popped up as this one.
Speaker 2But, um, there's a girl that comes home, um, and she's she's home alone for some reason, whatever, and she's got her dog there with her, and so she turns off the lights, she's going to go to bed. She hears a sound and she puts her hand next to the bed. The dog licks her hand. So she's like okay, dog's here, I'm good, right, like, I'm fine, um, and then she starts hearing like dripping, and she's like OK, that's weird. She puts her hand down. The dog licks her hand. She's like all right, I'm fine. And then something else happens, right. And so she puts her hand down. Dog licks her hand. And then finally she's like fuck, I don't know what's going on. I need to get up and go see what's going on and in the window that says dogs aren't the only things that lick what. And so there's like a murderer in her house Just randomly licking a hand.
Speaker 5This sounds like the headlights, the man in headlights. Don't flash your headlights at somebody. Yeah, well, and then she calls the cops and then turns out the murder was in the backseat. Just you know, whenever he put his headlights flashes, the guy would drop down.
Speaker 5Yeah, there's another one I heard. It's really good. A husband goes to his wife and he's got a duck in his hands and he says this is the pig I've been fucking. And the wife says that's not a pig, that's a duck. And the husband says I wasn't talking to you, wasn't that a good one? That's good.
Speaker 2That's a good one. I like that one.
Speaker 5Those remember those. The book and Guillermo del Toro made a series, the movie About things you shouldn't say to your wife.
Speaker 2Yeah.
Speaker 5Remember that book, that scary book, um like are you afraid of the dark? No, no no, it's, I don't know like stories that you know you don't tell in the dark oh yeah, this is like a couple years ago. Yeah, I remember that made the movie yeah, I need to watch that and see if it's.
Speaker 2Are you afraid of the dark? No, it's a nickelodeon show but it was scary, that was a good show I never saw it, I was too poor uh, my grandma had for nickelodeon. Yeah, my grandma had cable.
Speaker 5I didn't have cable. I had network tv.
Speaker 2I watched friends at 6 30 nice I always thought that throwing dirt on a fire would make it sparkle it didn't.
Speaker 5Who told you?
Speaker 2who told you that's what they do. They said like uh. They said like something, and then they would reach in a little baggie. They would reach in the baggie and throw it, and it would just sparkle.
Speaker 3So it wasn't dirt in there.
Speaker 2Well, I didn't know, I didn't know it wasn't dirt.
Speaker 3It's magic dirt you dumbass.
Speaker 2Fucking asshole man Throwing regular dirt. It's magic dirt. All right, we dirt. All right, we're moving on from urban legends. I've got four things we could talk about. All right, y'all get to pick which. Okay, I like this zombie apocalypse, halloween costumes, horror movies. Or would you rather? I feel like we already talked about horror movies, okay, kind of talked about halloween costumes, a I mean, what was the last? Yeah, zombie crawl and all that. Okay, so it's, would you rather? Or zombie apocalypse. I would rather go with. Would you rather? Personally, okay?
Speaker 5Real quick. It was a scary stories to tell in the dark. Scary stories to tell in the dark, that was the sorry Got it All right, got it All right.
Speaker 2So would you rather and this is strategically made just for the Funky Panther, I love it whenever AI gets everything right Right? Would you rather spend Halloween night naked, except for a strategically placed pumpkin, or wear a sexy ghost costume that literally is just a sheer bed sheet with holes in all the wrong places.
Speaker 5Can I go first? I'm going to say the sheer bed sheet, because Halloween is Tammy's birthday and so I'm sure she would appreciate me in a sheer thingy.
Speaker 2With a hole in the right place Wrong place With the holes in the wrong places.
Speaker 5Is it just going to be like on my belly button in my butt wrong holes on the wrong places? Is it just gonna be like on my belly button in my butt terrible places to holes.
Speaker 2I too am gonna go with that, because it is tammy's birthday, hey no no no, I was uh um would I rather well, we made songs about. You know the trick-or-treating when you're naked. Um, I think, the strategically placed pumpkin.
Speaker 5It's going to be in your butt. I'm just saying it's going to be in your butt obviously.
Speaker 2It's the stem. So I've just got a pumpkin tail yeah.
Speaker 4Yes.
Speaker 2I mean, I guess in your example you're probably not going to jail, right? Because you're covered, I'm covered, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're covered with a pumpkin over your junk. Yeah, with the ghost. Paul Verk can't go out in public. You're going to jail.
Speaker 5If you got your thing out in a ghost costume.
Speaker 2But, that being said, I'd go with the ghost costume as well.
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 2Herbie's right, it would be a little pumpkin, little pumpkin All. Would you rather have to go down on a zombie who just ate brains, or let Dracula suck on your neck while you're completely naked? Hey, it's not your neck.
Speaker 5My penis. Yeah, suck, I want to suck your dick, is it? Can I pick the vampire?
Speaker 2No, Ah, fuck, it's Dracula.
Speaker 5It says Dracula I wanted to be Jasper from twilight. I want to see those dead eyes biting my penis jesus my apologies, man. We just saw twilight last week. I can't, fucking, I cannot watch it. I still want to watch. I have tried.
Speaker 2I have tried watching. That's good. I'm going to go with the Dracula. I want to suck your balls, but I've tried to watch Twilight and then, when the wolves were looking at each other but they were talking through telekinesis or whatever Yep, telekinesis, whatever it is I was just like I can't do this. He's like my balls hit.
Speaker 5She's like I'm a werewolf. It was too fucking weird.
Speaker 2I think I've got to gummy up before I watch them.
Speaker 5I think you probably do too. You've got to gummy up, to get gummied up. You know what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2By the way, I think I already mentioned, but these spirits they got out now. These THC spirits are so good.
Speaker 5The gummies that we had.
Speaker 2Oh yeah, javier's been drinking those.
Speaker 5The same company that made the seltzers that we had uh from roy pope, bro, that they make gummies. Apparently now they make gummies and uh, we, me and tammy, and uh, can I? Can I say, could she? She, none of her co-workers, jesse, were on the gummies and um on the gummies on the gum on the gummies. And uh, we were sitting down, we're eating and then, we're sitting no, it was.
Speaker 5It was a cbd it was cbd, isn't anything in the end of them but uh, don't we get the camera allegedly um, but I was like it was hitting me. I was like, oh god, and I asked I'm like is it hitting anybody, and jesse's like I'm glad you said something because I feel like we've been sitting here and nobody said a word. There's all these people around us and it feels so weird, but yeah.
Speaker 2Nice, good stuff All right. Zombie or Dracula. I said Dracula, dracula, yeah, I can't get past the smell. Yeah, same, that's where I'm at. I'm going to say Dracula, I'll take it, it's going to All right. Would you rather get caught masturbating by a trick-or-treater while dressed as the sexy version of a children's character, or accidentally walk in on your parents having Halloween-themed role play, full costume and all?
Speaker 5Well, my parents are divorced.
Speaker 2My mom's dead. She's a ghost. I don't mom's dead. She's a ghost. I don't know, maybe she's dressed up.
Speaker 5Well, the first one, you're gonna go to jail and you're gonna be on a list.
Speaker 2There's no win-win on this this is a lose-lose that's really bad. There's therapy. There's therapy that can be had for the second one yeah, the first one you're it's not going to.
Speaker 5You're gonna go to jail. Yeah, your life is ruined. I'll go with the second one. Give me the second one. Yeah, second one. I'm not trying to peewee, herman.
Speaker 2Yeah, with the second one for Javier. He's going to be confused though, thinking his parents are getting back together. Mommy, daddy, all right. Would you rather have a one-night stand with a vampire who insists on biting everywhere, or a werewolf who keeps howling mid-hookup but can't seem to find the right position? So I'm the receiver on this one, or what?
Speaker 1Yeah.
Speaker 5Give me the first one. Bite me, bite me everywhere. How bad are we biting? I mean, edward bit Bella a shitload of times when she was dead, so I mean, I guess it's not the same. She was dead and then she turned into a vampire. Give me the first one. Give me the first one, I'll go with the first one. Yeah, same here.
Speaker 2All right. Would you rather be forced to go to an adult Halloween party where the only way to leave is to make out with everyone there, or have to participate in a full-on pumpkin spice flavored orgy? Everything from whipped cream to everything.
Speaker 2Pumpkin spice, give me the orgy, baby, give me the orgy. Just a peck like with everybody is, yeah, you gotta, you gotta kiss everyone there, is it like, um? Or get yourself involved in a full-on pumpkin spice flavored orgy. The pumpkin spice flavored orgy, I think, would probably be the better option. Agree and hear me out, hear me out, hear me out.
Speaker 3It doesn't mean that you have you like to sell this. I agree with just me out, hear me out.
Speaker 2It doesn't mean that you have just like to sell this. I agree with, just because it's an orgy doesn't mean you have to participate with everybody.
Speaker 5You're just participating, right, and there happens to be an orgy harry's gonna have like a halloween themed face mask and uh, pumpkin spice, uh pegging sticks. What was it?
Speaker 2creed bratton on, uh, the office, on the office. Yeah, he was going on about how, like the 60s and oh yeah sometimes you know you it was, you're covered in mud and you know things got slipped in jesus what about you, javier? Uh, the kids you're kissing, kiss, kissing yeah, no, you gotta make out with everybody ah um hey, javier's first time not the first, not the last.
Speaker 4Uh, real quick, though, probably the orgy, yeah, yeah, for sure.
Speaker 2Chrissy's saying don't watch any old VHS tapes you find in your parents house.
Speaker 5I'm still laying down, oh fuck, we still have the.
Speaker 2You still have that VHS tape. I thought you said you lost them.
Speaker 5I don't know where that it was in the gold box. Be my guest, go into my garage and try to find it in there. I'm telling you, I got you.
Speaker 2That would have blown us up on social media.
Speaker 3That would have been a whole thing it still will.
Speaker 2I will spend a whole day finding it.
Speaker 5I mean yeah, more than welcome to, that's fine.
Speaker 2I mean, it was a hell of a story.
Speaker 5We can set up VHS here.
Speaker 2Yeah, I here. Yeah, I mean, we just got to get a VCR. Yeah, I'm sure. Would you rather get stuck in a haunted house where every door you open leads to an increasingly graphic sex scene involving famous horror characters, or be haunted for a year by a ghost that won't stop giving you ghost handsies at the worst possible time? I'm going with ghost handsies, man. You know what it's like. My worst nightmare is being stuck in a haunted house and just opening doors and can't get out. You're just like just let me out of here. Jason and freddy are having sex.
Speaker 5At least at least I'm getting something out of it, even if it is in the inopportune time yeah, it's gonna be like, you know, when you're in high school and you get that mystery boner and the bell rings and you're like, oh, fuck, fuck, what do I? And you hide the backpack in front of your boner.
Speaker 2You got to tuck it in your waistband.
Speaker 5Yep, or you pray to God. Your shirt's long enough to cover it up.
Speaker 2Or you hope this ghost comes along and finishes you off. You know what I mean.
Speaker 5Yes, ghost handjob.
Speaker 1Is that the one you're going?
Speaker 2with.
Speaker 5Ghost handjob.
Speaker 2Yeah, same. Have y'all gone to a haunted house? I'm not opposed to trying. Are you talking about haunted houses or ghost handjobs? The handjob from the ghost, okay.
Speaker 4I summon you spirits to jack me off.
Speaker 2It's been some years since I've been to a haunted house, really, yeah.
Speaker 5As you say, it's been a couple years since I got jacked off by a ghost.
Speaker 2Yeah, I haven't been. I think the last time I went to a haunted house was like Hangman's and it was over off of it was it was still over at the old magic et cetera.
Speaker 5Yeah, magic et cetera.
Speaker 1So it's been it's been.
Speaker 5That was the last one I went to.
Speaker 1It's been some years.
Speaker 5I'm like 15, 20 years.
Speaker 2It's been. I went to one, uh, a couple, a couple think they had it, but I guess he went on break by the time we left. I don't know was a chainsaw guy. It reminded me when you were the chainsaw guy at one point, when you were doing that uh on the side, I did that uh, I I participated at uh cutting edge cutting edge, yeah, at whenever it's at the old building, yeah, yeah, I can't remember the guy's name.
Speaker 2There was a guy that we went to school with. He was kind of a weird dude, but he um, him and I were talking and he was like I work at the cutting edge. I was like, oh, I want to do. He's like we'll just show up. Literally, he just said just show up at this place at this time. And so I showed up at that place at a time. He said wear black pants and a black shirt. And that do it, okay. And so I did it and I got to run the chainsaw. Man, it was fun. All right, I'm going to do. We've got four more here. We'll do two. Would you rather have to give a lap dance to your boss while dressed as a dominatrix at aeen office party, or get tied up and blindfolded as part of a public bdsm halloween event in front of your entire family?
Speaker 5yeah, just tie me up, give me the second they've seen me weird.
Speaker 2So your family rather than your boss, yep all right percent. My boss is my dad it's the same thing for you. My boss is a 67 year old man. I don't, I don't want to do that. Uh, let me see this one's about shrieking no corn maze. I mean, that sounds interesting. Uh, we'll move on to the next one, though. Would you rather get pegged by someone in a fredgie krueger costume, or give a blowsie to someone dressed as michael myers? But he never takes the mask off.
Speaker 5Oh, fuck, just in your mouth or just in your butt. Which one do you? Want to pick man put it in my butt. I mean, I just want to see.
Speaker 2I'm going to go with that one because that leads me to believe that it's I mean.
Speaker 5Better out than in, I say.
Speaker 2I'll go with the latter Look man.
Speaker 5I'm comfortable enough with my sexuality, but I'm not taking loads from nobody. I mean in both of those situations you're taking loads.
Speaker 2You're taking loads.
Speaker 5But the other one I'm not going to have the taste in my mouth.
Speaker 2Can it be like a whole Pulp Fiction type situation? You mean like you're going to be in a ball gag.
Speaker 4Where, at the end of it, I get my redemption and get to kill Freddie.
Speaker 2Yeah, sure.
Speaker 5All right cool.
Speaker 2Yeah, go with that one.
Speaker 5All right, we'll do a haunted house at a strip club one time. Seriously, I would love to go to a haunted house at a strip club. I would love that. Yeah, do they do that?
Speaker 2I don't know. I mean, I'm still a child when it comes to sexy costumes, because they're my absolute favorite. The only way to find out is by going to a strip club on Halloween. I mean, what is it next Thursday?
Speaker 4Is that?
Speaker 2trick-or-treating. When's their Thursday?
Speaker 5Ooh, what's Red Bar? It says Red Bar's watching I don't know. Is that?
Speaker 2I think it's them, I don't know what that is, I think it's them. I don't know what that is, hi, hello. Thanks for watching, all right last thing.
Speaker 5Hold on, wait, let's repeat what we said. Would you rather get pegged by uh? Would you rather get pegged by uh, michael Myers? Or no, no. Would you rather by?
Speaker 2Freddy Krueger or Blosey uh to Michael Myers while wearing them, while they're wearing the mask and they're looking at you the whole time you see their eyes but you don't.
Speaker 5Yeah, That'd be kind of weird.
Speaker 2That's creepy yeah yeah, oh, you must maintain eye contact. Wait, wait, how big are we talking? How girthy is it?
Speaker 5How girthy is it Actually? It's a good question, it's not I'm not answering this question.
Speaker 2That's actually. He's got a point.
Speaker 5And can I take, like what's that thing? Popper? Yeah, you can get poppers. You can get poppers.
Speaker 2Thank you.
Speaker 1Yeah, you're good.
Speaker 2Okay, okay. This last question is about zombie apocalypse and you're going to build your own survival team. Okay, oh, that's easy. So you're going to have two people, we know.
Speaker 3Ron Swanson.
Speaker 2Two friends, oh oh, two friends. Two celebrities and then one character.
Speaker 5So like Ron Swanson could be one, because he's a character.
Speaker 2Yeah, 100%.
Speaker 3Okay, so two people we know two celebrities, one character.
Speaker 2It's a zombie apocalypse. Yeah, oh man. Oh man, I'm trying to think that's really tough. I've got to think of who's got a shit ton of random weapons Stephen Furpies, stephen Furpies, I'm. Who's got a shit ton of uh, random weapons.
Speaker 5Steven furpies, steven furpies, I'm gonna bring all furpies along. I haven't.
Speaker 2I haven't talked to him in years, but I'm gonna show up.
Speaker 1You'll probably shoot me, so I'll get out of that apocalypse real quick yeah, you're the first one to go don't have to worry about anymore he's like you's on me.
Speaker 2Nope, dead, problem solved. Yeah, um, old furpies, I'm gonna go grab him and and I don't know who the other one would be I'm trying to think my old work partner, two Stevens, I'll get two Stevens.
Speaker 1Okay.
Speaker 2At least I've got someone who can perform first aid on me and I've got someone who's probably got illegal weapons.
Speaker 5Probably got illegals hiding down and booby traps.
Speaker 2One character, two actors. Two actors and one character, two actors Ron Swanson.
Speaker 5That's not an actor, it's a character.
Speaker 2Ron Swanson's a character, and then my other character is going to be.
Speaker 4No, you can only pick one character and two actors.
Speaker 5Oh, two actors.
Speaker 1And it's not just actors, it's famous people, ron.
Speaker 2Swanson, and then my other two famous jason momoa and um okay, you're just getting a pretty boy, he's just a pretty boy he's does not he's a big, he's not a surfer he can probably do things. I mean, he's a surfer, I'm sure I feel like he can hurt people. He's not a villain, no, he's not. He's not. He's not aquaman. He seems like a nice guy. Yeah, I wouldn't mind running around and protecting me.
Speaker 2Right, jason Momoa, and let's go ahead and let's bring in what's that? Oh man, what is her name? Jennifer Lawrence. What for Jennifer Lawrence? What for? She's kind of weird. Okay, yeah, she's kind of weird, but I think she does. Why? I think she does her own stunts. Okay, yeah, she's kind of weird, but I think she does her own stunts.
Speaker 5Another thing can I freeze time in this scenario?
Speaker 2I think she does her own stunts.
Speaker 5Jesus Christ dude. Okay, god damn it. Two people. I know my friend, jared, who's my Cornwell rep, cornwell, cornwell. He's got a shitload of weapons and he grew up in Iowa, so I think he's a little hillbilly ish. Another person, tammy, you know. You know why two famous people could probably be Nick Offerman. You know the guy who yeah, ron Swanson.
Speaker 2So y'all picked the same guy, okay, no, no, no. I picked Nick Offerman, he picked Nick Offerman.
Speaker 5I specifically picked Ron, and he's the same guy. It's the same guy.
Speaker 4I know yeah he still.
Speaker 5He does everything that Ron Swanson does. He was in what was that Last of Us? Or whatever. Oh, he was, yeah, yeah, oh. Zombie Apocalypse. Daryl dixon from, uh, the walking dead, that's your character, that's my character, and uh, the other famous person good one.
Speaker 2That is a very good one other famous person would probably be I should have picked the asian guy from uh, which one the one that gets his head bashed, Ooh or Negan.
Speaker 5He would have been a good one too.
Speaker 2No, he's going to turn on your ass, man.
Speaker 5You're right, you're right, ooh, you're right. Other famous person, probably Helen Mirren. What for? Oh wait what? She does her own stuff, she does her own stunts, she does her own stunts.
Speaker 4You're fucking stupid.
Speaker 5Helen Mirren does her own stunts. Actually, no, no, martha Stewart. Martha Stewart, does she cook you some food and give? You some dank-ass weed, that's right, and she's a looker too. Martha, yeah, nah, yeah, like maybe young and she's a looker, too, martha. Yeah, nah yeah like maybe young Martha young Martha, young Martha and young Helen, but old Helen, old Helen young Hillary Clinton.
Speaker 2What?
Speaker 4what? Why not right news to me, young Nancy Pelosi wow, who does Nancy Pelosi?
Speaker 5what? Yeah, young Nancy Pelosi, that can't be true. Yeah, she was. There's a picture of her and JFK together.
Speaker 2No way yeah, yeah. Look it up Nancy Pelosi, I believe it, I am All right.
Speaker 5Do you got people though? Do you got people? Yeah, I would like to know.
Speaker 2You've been asking questions, but I do now. One would be Sarish Smart. You're an idiot. No, no, no. Jennifer Lawrence, no, no, no, I'm not an idiot. I'm not bringing Jesse. All your stuff's going to be gone. I'm not bringing Jesse into the apocalypse. Right, I get it.
Speaker 5Martha Stewart.
Speaker 2She's going to have me kill her before any of this, because she's not going to want to do this. She's not Katniss from Hunger Games, I think two. I would say Dustin, like Massey.
Speaker 5No, no, oh, you mean Jay Jones from Massacre.
Speaker 2Oh, dustin, no, that Dustin. Yeah, I was like Dustin Massey he'll serenade you, he's well prepared.
Speaker 3I think he's good.
Speaker 2And then for celebrities I would say Bill Gates, because that motherfucker probably has bunkers underground everywhere. So I feel like that's smart Bear Gorillaz.
Speaker 5Bear Gorillz. Bear Gorillz, whatever his name is he's not going to like you.
Speaker 2If you can't say his name, well, I'm just going to call him Bear and I'm going to be like you're welcome. I can't feel around. Bitch, damn it. Steve Harvey would have been a good one. Steve Harvey, I keep thinking of good ones. Now, steve Harvey would be great. He does his own studs too. And then for my character, blade, okay, okay, okay, yeah he's a vampire killer. I just go around thinking of like I keep picturing Steve Harvey now.
Speaker 2He's just walking up to fucking zombies and he's like what's the number one answer? Oh, no, no, no, you got it. He fucking kills them.
Speaker 5You know, he pulls a shotgun out and he's pointing.
Speaker 2Dude, I think we could make an awesome zombie movie. Yeah, I mean, I think that would be a lot of fun. Actually, that premise in a movie Like, say, you're getting pushed down, like all right, here's the deal, you get to pick five people and here are the rules, and you pick those five people and then you can have like these, like random celebrities in your movie, and stuff like that. That'd be a really cool idea for a movie. That would be a good idea. Yeah, that's it. That's all I had.
Speaker 5You know. So the whole thing with that is if we Did you look up Nancy Pelosi, JFK, oh no, If a movie gets made now.
Speaker 2Based off of that, we know where it got leaked from to people that watch.
Speaker 5I mean, I got plenty of ideas for movies With that said, okay, I can see it. Yeah, yeah, she still likes.
Speaker 2Looks like her, though, you think let me see, let me see this you told him to look it up and you never see I know,
Speaker 5I have. I mean, obviously it was on reddit it was on reddit all right, everybody.
Speaker 2thank you for hanging out with us on, uh, episode 185 of the funky panther. If you want to do so, please make sure you follow us on all things social media at the funky panther and you can go to the funky panthercom for anything and everything we got. You can call text, leave us a voicemail. You didn't do it during the show, even though we said do disturb us, 817-677-0408. That's it, anything you want to end on? Yeah, I got something. This episode is brought to you by Panther City Foodies, not that other group ran by that bitch. Connie, support your community and eat local. Yeah, so stay good, everybody, I'm Chad.
Speaker 5I'm looking at pictures of Martha Stewart in Sports Illustrated.
Speaker 4And I'm Tim, and we are the Funky Panther. Look at that. Bye.
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