The Funky Panther
The Funky Panther podcast: Chad, Javier, and Tim deliver high-energy, hilarious banter with random commentary, raunchy humor, and featured guests. Join the fun for an hour-long show that takes you on a refreshing, informative journey through the colorful world of music, news, arts, and entertainment.
The Funky Panther
Unpredictable Adventures: Home Births, Joe Exotic, and Dank817's Wild Ride
What happens when you mix a home birth story with the wild antics of Joe Exotic? You get an episode that's as unpredictable as it is entertaining! We're thrilled to have our buddy Dank817, aka the Big Shark from Too High, back with us in the studio. We kick things off by laughing over memories of our past sessions, including that unforgettable smoky recording incident. Dank opens up about his struggles with confidence in his music career and how the support from his crew is reigniting his passion. Plus, we get real about juggling creative ambitions with the rollercoaster of parenthood and aging.
Ever thought about what it would be like to witness a home birth? We share a candid, humorous perspective that might just change your views on responsibility and family. There's also exciting news in the cannabis world with Too High's upcoming Gas Station Texas event—think live performances and a kickball tournament! Alongside these highlights, we dive into some bizarre and hilarious moments, including Joe Exotic's prison romance and the idea of hosting a Funky Panther rally with a comedian like Shane Gillis.
We wrap things up with a comedic look at specialty underwear and TikTok's weirdest trends. From mushroom coffee to nicotine's nootropic potential, we chat about the quirkiest aspects of modern life. We even throw in a game inspired by The Sopranos, where every gabagool mention or iconic Carmella moment calls for a celebration. With Dank817's infectious energy and our shared love for life's oddities, this episode promises laughs, camaraderie, and plenty of unexpected twists!
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Does a penis taste like cotton candy? Um no, oh man. If it is, if it tastes like a beef and cheese from Arby's, I'm fucked Get in here.
Speaker 2:We gotta start the show. Want another?
Speaker 3:one buddy. Yeah, I'm down. Hey, so what?
Speaker 1:What is this? It's like white people elixir.
Speaker 2:It's good, though, oh hello everyone and welcome to the Funky Panther Coming to you from Fort Worth, texas. We have got a hell of a show for you here on episode 186. We have got our man the big shark the man from too high. Dank817. Yes, sir, it's been a minute since we've had you. You've never been in the new studio. Oh no, I haven't bro, it's been a minute.
Speaker 3:since we've had you, You've never been in the new studio. Oh no, I haven't right, it's just fucking nice as fuck.
Speaker 2:Appreciate you. Hell yeah, I did it all myself.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you did a good job.
Speaker 2:Sit back, relax, enjoy. Let's get into it. I'm Chad, I'm Javier, I'm Tim. We are the Funky Panther. I like that Dank shows up and he's like is this where we?
Speaker 2:had it last time. He's like I don't remember pulling up here. Well, if you recall and I mentioned this in the first 30, if you don't already do so make sure you subscribe to our YouTube channel so you can see all the crazy shit that we talk about on the first 30. But in the first 30, we talked about the last time you were on and miraculously I don't even know how it happened but the video cut out and it cuts back on and then just the room is full of smoke.
Speaker 2:Yes, sir, you know what I mean I tend to do that we probably should have prepared better and done it again this time we had a smoke show we had one of those.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we did His name's Dank. We had one of those smoke machines man.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we did have a smoke machine. His name is Dank.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's my nickname, but we should have planned for that this time too, goddamn fools, you know you got the Big Show. Yeah, dank's wrestling name would be the Smoke Show, smoke Show, smoke Show. Yeah, nice, and just be like this and smoke.
Speaker 3:No, for real, that's fucking hilarious so.
Speaker 2:Dank, how you been man.
Speaker 3:It's been a little bit, bro, man hanging out staying above water um trying to stay creative. Yeah, yeah, man, that's about it staying creative.
Speaker 2:Talked about you juggling all the lives. Right, you're working. Yeah, your dad man now, yes, sir, you're still doing all the things with the too high. Oh yeah, you still, uh, doing music and stuff.
Speaker 3:Yeah, not as much, maybe, yeah you're busy, but you're still doing it, yeah, just trying to get more back into music because, um, I don't know why, bro, like I had like a confidence thing with with music, out of nowhere. It just kind of came where I was like, oh no people even like I suck.
Speaker 2:Well, it wasn't that, because it's just damn too it kind of was. I'm saying like you get that mindset, you're, you're just like because I would.
Speaker 3:I it got like it got to the point where I was recording songs and then I was telling the producer like hey brother, this shouldn't even sound good, like I was like you even like this shit and I was like I'm gonna just kind of sit back for a minute. But then, um, my homie session and eric evans kind of was like you know, like come on, like let's make some music. And then, like I made some songs, like I did, just did a song with joe for him a feature, so oh yeah, that's pretty cool, but just trying to get my confidence back and dropping music and getting back out there like how I used to be yeah, did you happen to?
Speaker 2:you mentioned eric. Did you happen to go to the uh thing that he was at with? Um, uh, it's ernie like over there at low down I didn't get to make it to that.
Speaker 3:I um, I don't remember what the fuck I was doing, but I just know I didn't get to make it to that.
Speaker 2:I really want to go. I was curious because I don't know if I've seen Eric live before.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he goes hard bro yeah, I mean I listen to some of the music.
Speaker 2:Obviously, he's one of your dudes, but I really want to go. But after being out all day for Arts Goggle, I was like I don't, I'm just, I'm too old for that shit. Like doing all day and night.
Speaker 3:I just couldn't do it.
Speaker 2:But I was. I was pretty bummed, I wanted to go real bad.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, same bro. I didn't get to make it out, I didn't even get to go. Who knows, it happens. It happens, bro. Sometimes you forget where you go.
Speaker 1:For us, it's that age, you know, we were like my knees hurt or like you know, I'm sleepy. I want to take a nap. I didn't get drunk. I wish I would have gotten drunk. I was taking care of a cat, but you know that's crazy.
Speaker 3:It's not bad not to just not to the studio.
Speaker 4:Oh wait, now you can't do that, it's too smoky. Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say I can't do.
Speaker 3:I'm like a response. I'm uh.
Speaker 2:My girlfriend says I'm like a hover dad yeah but sometimes I wonder, though, like you see parents, I go to some of these music festivals and stuff and you'll see um parents like they're trying to show, like look, we could, we can still do it yeah we can still do it. And then by the end of the night like you see those same parents and they're just like but it's a lot fucking done, and like they have the kid with them and like I can, I can see it in their face. They're like blaming this child yeah for ruining all their yeah for ruining their life, that's what's happened.
Speaker 2:I could see it. You get like and you and I've looked. Man, I've looked in some of these guys eyes like the you know the dads. I've looked at them, they've looked at me, they made eye contact and we talked. We talked through our eyes and he's like straight up like I don't't know what I did.
Speaker 3:Bro, that's how I am every time I go to the grocery store.
Speaker 4:You see somebody I'm like.
Speaker 3:I feel you brother. But, no, I get it, bro, because when we first started taking the baby even the older kid it was kind of more of like fuck, why do we do this? But once you kind of get it in, get used to it. Because you still got to keep in mind. They have a schedule that they follow. So, right, as long as you follow the schedule, I feel like you're good, because the last few times we went out with the baby she's been asleep, so you know perfect.
Speaker 2:I ran into a friend um at arts goggle a few years ago and he he had just had a kid and he's you know, they're pushing their baby through there and he's like you want to see the best thing about having a kid. And I was like no, yeah, sure. And he like lifts up the back of the stroller and he's got a cooler back there with his drinks. He's like nobody ever looks in the stroller. Yeah, it's basically like a wagon you can always be carrying.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean, except you got your kid in there, so no one gives a shit.
Speaker 3:Bro, last Saturday the bottom of our stroller was a box of Michelobes and a four-pack from Martin House.
Speaker 2:See, it works. Maybe having kids is worth it, for that Maybe it's not that bad.
Speaker 3:Nah, you're going to lose some sleep, that's bad for me. You're definitely going to lose some sleep, man. And then you're going to start hearing crying out of nowhere. Bro, that shit's crazy. I'd be hearing babies crying.
Speaker 2:I'd be like where's my baby? Like there's nothing no. Nobody was crying. I hear phantom phone vibrations.
Speaker 3:Nah, it's just like a thing, bro. I don't know, that's weird. I think they call it a phantom cry. You just be hearing shit, but it's not really nothing.
Speaker 1:I saw on an episode of the Office where Pam comes back to the Office and Kevin hears, like I heard, if you cry in front of a mother she starts lactating. And then he goes up to Pam's titties and he's like wah, wah, wah. And she's like, oh, what the fuck? You know, like you know, she went lactating. But I guess another baby cried at the end of the episode. She started like lactating. So is that true?
Speaker 3:You know, I didn't ask and I didn't experience that. To be honest, but I mean. I did experience like random.
Speaker 2:Like she would show me like yeah, it was weird. I don't think dank's going around crying at tits. No, I wasn't. It's a weird thing to ask, javier.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it was a real weird thing, I don't know where it came from. I had like a whole bro because I watched the baby come out, like I was like, oh really, like I was like with the doctor, like she was like catch her.
Speaker 3:I was like, oh my I, I was like you're like a baseball mitt or what no, I was more of kind of like like a tony hernandez coming off the blind, you know what I'm saying. No, it was just weird. So that like I was kind of like on the side, like if this was like the coochie. Yeah, I was like on the side and then the doctor was like right here, but I was like helping the, my girl and the doctor at the same time and and the baby came out bro.
Speaker 3:It was like she came out like that and then in my head I was like what the fuck? And then, like it kind of went back in.
Speaker 2:She's trying to get a look and she's like nah, I'm good.
Speaker 3:To the top, like right here I'm going back in, and she was like get ready, dad. And then she pushed and that baby just was like, and I was like oh my god. And then I was like what the fuck? And then the umbilical cord bro, I'll never forget this shit. This shit was warm on my fucking leg. It's a beautiful thing it was, but it was like crazy to me because after I was like bro, like what the fuck? And then we just went home after like like right after we went home.
Speaker 2:How long did it take before you started crying?
Speaker 3:I didn't cry. I'm not a crier, I'm a man. No, but I didn't cry, bro. I just was more of like damn, like what the fuck?
Speaker 1:We just had a fucking baby. What the fuck?
Speaker 3:Just the way you put it, you're like huh Because you know, Even then, like I didn't plan on getting high, but then my girl. So look, I'm about to tell you what happened. We were supposed to have a water birth Right and my girl was in the the bathtub Doing her thing and she was like Quit fucking staring at me, go hit your pen. And I was like okay, and I took off running. I went to go hit the pin but I was hitting that hole like harder than you're supposed to hit a fucking THC pin.
Speaker 3:I came back in all cool calm and I'm like, yeah, I'm ready for this shit. I remember hearing fucking G Herbo playing on the speaker. I was like let's get this shit going. Then it got to going. I was like, oh my God.
Speaker 1:Wow, so you did that on purpose.
Speaker 3:You inhaled that like I need to. I need to hit that. I went and hit that bitch like a couple more times, probably like five to six. I ain't gonna lie.
Speaker 2:Every time I was told to go, I did it makes sense because you were chill, calm, collected, present, cool, yeah, through it all yeah, I didn't, I didn't like go.
Speaker 3:I wanted to. A couple times I want to be like what the fuck? Because I better. You see some shit when you're down there and I feel like I was in the war, bro.
Speaker 2:I feel like I was in World War 2.
Speaker 1:You see some shit Down there, in them trenches, oh my god dude, you got more More heart than I do, cause I think I would've been Like playing Playstation In the waiting room.
Speaker 3:There was no TV. There was no TV like kind of crazy to, because you know it happened so fast. Like I said, we literally went back home after they gave us like a little meal you know, but we know we left but we had a like a home birth at a birthing center, like we didn't go to the doctor okay, got it yeah.
Speaker 3:So it was a bit different for me from my first kid. Like this shit crazy. I'll never forget that shit, bro. That shit was like bro coochies be opening the fuck up. I don't know, bro. I had a. I got a different respect for women after and they fuck my music up, bro. I can't rap about hoes and shit. No more, man, because now you're like. You know what I respect. You can't rap about these bitches, and I seen somebody have a baby and it's like, bro, y'all be fucking giving life.
Speaker 3:yeah, yeah, yeah, like what the fuck? Respect, you Can't rap about these bitches. And I seen somebody have a baby and it's like, bro, y'all be fucking given life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like what the fuck Do you look at everything a little bit different now.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, cause you know I can't, you can't be doing out, you know, or even just like fucking up and just leaving. It's like where you got like kids, like you just got a responsibility, you know yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So another. You got one. Are you confident you're like I can go for another one?
Speaker 3:yeah, yeah, man. Um, honestly, if I'm gonna be honest, I I could go for like three more okay, but I'm not right now. I'm not. I'm not, I'm not willing to gamble because I want three more. I want them to be boys, cause I grew up in a house full of girls. I only got one brother, but I got four sisters. I don't think I can do it again Like another house full of girls. I don't think I can. Yeah, I'll try, but not right now.
Speaker 1:Dude, I'll tell you. You said they, they give life.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's crazy you all you do is just and they take care of the rest. It's like you know, it's crazy, it's wild, yeah that shit's fucking crazy, bro.
Speaker 2:Like what if we were like seahorses though? Oh yeah, that would be fucking funny the dudes you know we had to carry just shitting out a bunch of. I don't think we could handle that.
Speaker 3:but you know, at one point in time I thought my girlfriend was gonna die yeah, I swear to because she was like I can't do this no more.
Speaker 2:And I was like Did she do it like all natural and shit or what? Yeah, all natural and I was like. Nah.
Speaker 3:Dude, I just remember telling her. I was like are you good she's?
Speaker 2:a boss.
Speaker 3:I'd be willing to hold the or something, or something. Nice. Yeah, that's real nice. I don't know, texas day, brazil, I mean god for sure I'll take that one yeah, it was crazy, bro, like shout out to her, but shout out to women too, just because that's crazy. They be having babies.
Speaker 1:They be having babies dude shout out to women that don't take epidurals like I mean, that's wild, god damn. Or just take it. You know I gotta be numb.
Speaker 2:I'd have to be numb. I'd have to be numb, I'd have to have no feeling.
Speaker 3:I went through the whole getting my hand squeezed thing.
Speaker 2:Or squizzed.
Speaker 3:Squizzed. That's not a word I heard that word before.
Speaker 2:Squizzed, squizzed.
Speaker 3:That's a squish, I could have thought.
Speaker 2:I heard that word somewhere. That can't be right. I could have thought I heard that word, that can't be right. Jamie, can you look that up?
Speaker 1:shout out to Vanya. She said she did it natural for both her kids.
Speaker 2:So she also said you forgot the last part. It's like death. Yeah, you're crazy. You forgot the last part. Yeah, it was crazy.
Speaker 3:Like I said, I was watching everything. I seen everything up close and personal, like I had meta goggles on. You know, I'm saying it was just like do they got that?
Speaker 1:do they got that app on the metal?
Speaker 2:I don't know why don't you look and see? I'm gonna check. I bet you can watch a youtube video and like it looks like it's no. Thank you, I feel like I didn't blink the whole time.
Speaker 3:It's right up there like I couldn't yeah, that's how I felt and then you know, after we went home like I said, after we went home directly, I just remember I was like what the fuck just happened like what the fuck do you think that?
Speaker 2:that's because of how many times you hit the pin and it made you like kind of in that or do you think you'd be like, if you were, if you were totally sober, do you think you'd be saying the same thing? Yeah, bro it was.
Speaker 3:It was like I think the pin just really enhanced my like what the fuck? Meter, because it was like if I was sober I probably wouldn't have been able to handle some of that shit yeah, I can, I can believe that when I was like hi, it was kind of like, okay, gross, but I can't move.
Speaker 3:You know, I'm like helping, and then it's like I'm right here already and like stuff's getting on me and I'm like, and then you know what was nasty? Like the nastier part the lady kept. She showed me like the placenta. Oh yeah, bro, that shit was like fucking it's wild like a jellyfish. I can't even think of the movie I watched. It could have been a spongebob episode where he had a flashlight and he flashed like some type of nasty shit on top. It was just like nasty looking and it smelled weird. But you know what was crazy?
Speaker 3:you know those cost a lot, yeah yeah, placentas, yeah and the lady asked us if we wanted to keep it, and I just was like, maybe we want to sell it, did you? No, I didn't want nothing to do with that.
Speaker 1:That's, uh, that's uh, you, they dry it out right and they eat it. Put it in pills, put in pills or stuff, yeah, for their hair.
Speaker 3:For their hair. It's apparently like Really good for your body, it's got like stem cells and all that stuff in it. Yeah, smells weird.
Speaker 2:Just don't tell me you did it Like I, just the thought of that yeah. I'm not gonna do it. I mean, I would never do that.
Speaker 3:I mean, I probably would If you didn't tell shit's tough, like fucking, it's like leather man yeah, like rubber, like rubber leather. Yeah, it's weird rubber leather.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they gave me some scissors, I've delivered, uh, I've delivered one.
Speaker 2:I've delivered one baby it's real warm, that was enough we got, we got a toilet baby too, and and that one was already delivered, so toilet, baby yeah, sometimes people think that they're. They don't know they're having a baby and comes out in the toilet. It happens. Yeah, I delivered one. That was enough for me. I was like I don't need to do this ever again Baby talk, baby talk, All right let's pivot, shall we? You're wearing Too High merch. Yes, sir, tell us, before we get into the upcoming event, what is Too High.
Speaker 3:Too High. You know it's just a cannabis club cannabis lifestyle. You just a cannabis club cannabis lifestyle. You know, we're just a movement group of people all enjoying the flower. We just meet up and have fun.
Speaker 2:Who all are a part of Too High.
Speaker 3:So it's me Big Dank, big Shark the CEO, my boy Kinky K, the other CEO. You know we kind of half and half.
Speaker 2:He's the one having all the parties, though, so we kind of half and half.
Speaker 3:He's the one having all the parties, though man fucking Kinky's the one down there turning up right now, but I haven't been to none of the parties.
Speaker 2:I mean, that's a hell of a drive. What is that like?
Speaker 3:seven or eight hours, something like that I used to go before I was involved in all this I'm in now. I used to go all the time Involved For real bro. I situations now it's like shit. I used to go to south podger all the time and turn up. You know we used to have shows and it's just popping down there too high. It's popping down there. We got brand ambassadors um, I ain't even gonna lie, I don't know their names because they're from down there. You know it's more of like a I don't, I try to keep up but shit with too high kind of moving real fast. So but yeah, we got brand ambassadors. Man, this shit moving, this shit jumping right now hell yeah, y'all still doing the the magazine yeah, we got the magazine.
Speaker 3:We just started a? Um instagram page for that. Um, I'm pretty sure it's called too high magazine. I'm not really ceo yeah, it's kind of kinky started kinky. Uh, it's kind of more of a kinky thing like this kinky shit. I don't really keep up with kinky, he kind of do his own thing. But yeah, the magazine is going good. I know I've been trying to look for like actual like, to get it actually printed up and going, but it's kind of a task Right now. It's all online, right? Yeah, everything's strictly online on TooHotTexascom.
Speaker 2:That's awesome.
Speaker 3:Hell yeah, I think we're on like issue three four nice maybe even five? No, I'm not really sure yeah, so this past year.
Speaker 2:So I went to. I've been to a couple of your events, but the one I remember was the one with the, the taco truck and everything like that, yeah, that shit was fun. I had a great time, um, and then I was like man, I can't wait till the next one, and I feel like it's just been like a dozen down near south lauderdale they've just all been down there.
Speaker 3:Um, like I said, kinky been down there turning up bro, they just um, they had the original, the first tiny sesh which we're doing, the tiny sesh two here in fort worth. Um, we had the too high arcade down there, yeah, um, all the pop-ups have been down there, which that's what we've been doing a lot of pop-ups down there.
Speaker 3:um, I just haven't had really no free time really to do anything up here, but I got got some now, so we're going to do it. That's why we're doing the event. And yeah, bro, I'm just really trying to do more up here because at first our first couple events were like I said, they were up here, but man, it's just, you know, you got to feed the crowd and the crowd was down there.
Speaker 2:I feel you, so what can you tell us about the upcoming event?
Speaker 3:Oh, that shit's going to be lit bruh. It's called the Gas Station Texas. It's a new THC, aids, cbd, like one of those legal dispensaries. Yeah, it's on fucking November 16th. It's kind of like the tiny sesh, like tiny desk, but no desk, just straight sesh. You know what I'm saying. But yeah, it's free. It's a free show, pretty much. We got trustee low um slug d low and north, just three artists um session djing, what the fuck else? Oh, oh, we also have a it's called proud. We have like a proud to pay thing, so we are selling tickets as well. But it's just all profit goes straight to the artist um it's 30, which you get access to. We'll have a smoke lounge for you to watch the show at, out of pretty much Comfortable couches TV, air conditioner, all that nice shit. You get free beer. Martin House sponsored the event. So that was cool, fucking A Hell. Yeah, shout out to Martin House, dude.
Speaker 2:Martin House is the shit they sponsor, all the cool shit.
Speaker 3:You know what they really the fuck are and you know what's crazy Martin House is like even them sponsoring events. They have fucking good ass, fucking beer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:So it's kind of like man dang Shout out to those guys. I'm glad I knew them. Glad they helped out. Are you still doing the kickball man? And you know what we, what we just talked about doing that the other day. Um, so I guess I could tell it here. I'm sure foe will probably kind of who cares? You know, we talked about that shit. Yeah, uh, kind of doing it more of tournament style because we didn't really want to do like too high versus full step go again yeah um, which the people I know.
Speaker 3:I talked to the dudes up at santo's tacos. They were down to play and I was telling fall like, maybe we can find some more people to get more teams, like you know and maybe make a whole day out of it.
Speaker 1:So that's yeah, yeah, like you said, a whole tournament format if somebody get a too high trophy yeah, because you know, when we had the last one, um it went, it went good.
Speaker 3:Honestly, we had it like real, legit, like it was up in a actual field man.
Speaker 1:I heard there was a bunch of cheating allegations man, let me tell you something about them bro we was whooping, I guess they would say we was cheating because we was winning.
Speaker 3:So I don't really know see how we was cheating. If we was winning, why do we have to cheat? It wasn't no fucking hard game. Hey, if you ain't cheating, you ain't winning. I mean, you ain't cheating, you ain't trying, that's right. But if we didn't have to cheat because we was already up before, like we took the break, it was like fucking 15 to 0 man see someone just say you're just playing hard, that's all it is, yeah but no, it was cool, bro.
Speaker 3:We had a halftime show. Yeah, we had a band, damn, I don't even want to lie who it was, I don't even remember what those, those boys were there, right?
Speaker 2:I want to say, yeah, they were there, right.
Speaker 3:I want to say yeah, they were there. Yeah, Jose, Did he play on the team? I saw Grizzly played on the team. If that's his real name it's Jose.
Speaker 2:His legal name's Grizzly. Saw them at TX Whiskey. I forgot about that Friday night for Grizzly's birthday.
Speaker 3:You know, I went and then at the door they was like we're not selling tickets, no more. No, uh, swear to god a tx. And then I was behind somebody they sold a ticket to motherfucker first off you don't have to buy a ticket, you just go straight to the bar.
Speaker 1:I did that shit. I went around for jesus when he performed yeah I went right around. I didn't even know where I was supposed to go. They're like, yeah, go over here.
Speaker 2:I'm like okay, and I went the opposite way and I just walked in well, it was packed because they were doing the they were doing like a screening or screening whatever they had. Hocus Pocus on, and so they had a lot of people in the back.
Speaker 1:Oh, all the white moms were over there, oh yeah.
Speaker 3:But I just now walked up and they was like what are you here for? And I was like, oh, it's my homie's birthday. And they was like you got a ticket. And I was like cannot buy one. And they I was like hearing the person in front of me and she's like, yeah, I just sent it, you know like we're not selling tickets, no more. But it was like I wasn't really tripping because I was like I'm not, it's seven streets like I'd rather not be here anyway.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but yeah it happened like hey, this racism is still out about, huh wow, that's crazy but you know what?
Speaker 3:I didn't even look at it as racism, I just look at it as, like you know what? I didn't even look at it as racism. I just look at it as like you know what Wait you were at TX.
Speaker 2:Whiskey. I went the golf course, or did you go to Texas Republic?
Speaker 3:No, texas Whiskey. Okay, you said 7th Street.
Speaker 2:I'm like this isn't on 7th Street.
Speaker 3:No wait, tx Whiskey. I just not went and they wouldn't let me in, because I was even talking to fucking Juan. Yeah, because he's like bro, I'm sorry, you're like, I don't know. He's like I'm right here at the gate and I was like bro. They ain't letting me in. Oh, that sucks.
Speaker 2:Man, I'm sorry. Well, it was pretty lame, if you're not. I mean it wasn't lame because of the weather was nice, it's a nice patio, but it wasn't like he was getting crazy or anything like that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, like I said, I wasn't really tripping either. I went and got food after Nice.
Speaker 4:Nice.
Speaker 2:All right, I want to bring up something real quick. Okay, so we kind of hinted at it earlier today, earlier this morning. I feel like we've been here for all day, use your words. We hinted on it during the first 30, but I stopped Javier and he wanted to basically send flowers to Joe Exotic.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah I almost said Exotic Joe.
Speaker 2:Joe Exotic, that's his other name. So Joe Exotic is engaged. What To another inmate at the federal prison? Oh boy yeah yeah, joe's been uh joe, joe's been uh into the guys busy beaver that joe exotic, yeah, so uh, he got engaged to um to a latino man. Yeah, because joe joe has a, joe has a type right, right, you know.
Speaker 4:So joe speaks spanish if you did not know, yeah, so if you didn't know.
Speaker 2:So I got a story. A friend of mine was running a. They got sent to the prison. They had to go take a sick person out of there and Joe Exotic happened to be there and the prisoner they were trying to take out spoke Spanish. Well, the guy that was going to pick him up is Hispanic but does not speak Spanish.
Speaker 4:And.
Speaker 2:Joe made fun of him. This dude got made fun of by joe exotic for not speaking spanish. That's that, that's fucking wild, that's awesome. Um, anyways, yeah, so uh, if you don't know, joe exotic is the tiger king right, so right he is uh, he is engaged to jorge marquez mendez. What says jokes? I Joe Exotic. Meet Jorge Marquez.
Speaker 3:Oh.
Speaker 2:Is what this says. He is 33. He is so amazing and he's from Mexico. Now the quest of getting married in prison and getting him asylum, or we be leaving America when we both get out. Either way, I wish I would have met him long ago. What is he in jail for? So Joe Exotic's in jail. I don't know what he's in jail for, but Joe Exotic's in jail for a murder for hire.
Speaker 3:How long do you go to jail for?
Speaker 2:that he's got 21 years.
Speaker 3:Maybe you should get less. I think, so he ain't really do it. That's the whole thing.
Speaker 2:He's saying that he actually wasn't trying to hire anybody, but he tried to hire. He told an FBI agent he was trying to hire. He wasn't hiring him.
Speaker 1:so Okay, so I do have news on why the other guy was in jail. Okay, immigration issues.
Speaker 2:Oh Well, he shouldn't be in jail. He shouldn't be. Could have thought of that he should just be thrown back across the border.
Speaker 3:Yeah, why did they?
Speaker 1:just do that. Why did they just do?
Speaker 2:that I mean, don't put him in jail.
Speaker 1:Poor guy, just throw him over like in a catapult, that's what happened, though?
Speaker 2:right, I thought they. I thought that's how they get him back. Is that not how they do it?
Speaker 3:It's all catapult Launch over illegal. They just sent you as. Yeah, I think they kept him in jail.
Speaker 2:So you just launch them like launch them in a catapult you land into the, the real, grand and I know somebody who was almost got deported back to africa, even though they were from france.
Speaker 3:No, yeah, what is my.
Speaker 2:That's a round of okay, wait a second.
Speaker 3:Almost went back to africa, even though they're for france, but they're getting deported regardless my, yeah, my cousin, cousin's baby daddy is from France, but I guess on his birth certificate, or whatever, it says Africa or whatever. And they were going to send him back to Africa and he ain't never been there. That's wild.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, send me back home. France is okay, but I don't know, I don't want to go there.
Speaker 3:I mean, I'm sure he probably lived there when he was younger and all that shit, but I just thought it was crazy like damn they're gonna send you to africa.
Speaker 1:A majority of the french national soccer team is actually they're from, I thought you was a french, nigga.
Speaker 2:No you was african oh fuck what was that on? I don't know that was on something I don't know.
Speaker 3:I thought I just made that no, I heard that somewhere.
Speaker 1:No, you never heard of. Yes, I did. If that, if I did.
Speaker 3:I didn't mean to steal it, I thought I just made that up. No, I heard that somewhere. No, you never heard it before. Yes, I did. If I did, I didn't mean to steal it, I thought I just made it up.
Speaker 2:So also on this whole celebrity thing, Trump just had a rally. Have you seen that shit? So Trump's opener was Tony Hitchcliffe.
Speaker 3:Kill Tony, kill Tony.
Speaker 2:Shout out to Kill Tony man. So did nobody vet Tony Because what he did like I listened to the whole thing. Did y'all end up watching the whole?
Speaker 4:thing, I listened to it. So I ended up listening to it this morning.
Speaker 2:It was fucking funny. I don't think it was funny. I think it was right up his alley. He's a roast comedian, right he? Right, he roasted everyone. Why would you have a roast comedian open up? He's like he. He followed the national anthem.
Speaker 3:Does that seem like a thing to do? Trump been on the run, though he was just on joe rogan and I think he was even on theo vons podcast he was on the nose everywhere.
Speaker 1:He wasn't there with the nut boys he was with that andrew schultz.
Speaker 2:He was with andrew schultz, oh yeah, and he's supposed to be on the main, the god too, he's supposed to be on with us next weekz he was with Andrew Schultz, oh yeah, and he's supposed to be on Charlemagne the God too. He's supposed to be on with us next week. Was he with Charlemagne the God? Because?
Speaker 3:that's Andrew Schultz and Charlemagne the God have a podcast together, right but he was with another dude.
Speaker 1:It was him and another white dude, but I don't think it was with him and Charlemagne I know charlemagne.
Speaker 2:I think she did his show so joe rogue was trying to get kamala on uh, but she didn't like a tight schedule or something.
Speaker 1:Yeah, made it difficult, trump made time hey, but I'll tell you what the entire state of puerto rico. They want to kill that motherfucker all right, so he killed tony.
Speaker 2:They want to kill him, so here's. Here's the thing.
Speaker 1:I've got some clips I'm gonna play real quick, even people that Nicky Jam, all those reggaeton people that were going for Trump.
Speaker 2:They're like, yeah, we ain't about that, no more are you going to play the clip, or should I tell the joke real quick? I'm going to play the clip real quick. The kill Tony one yeah okay, so let me pull that up. I'm just going to do it over here.
Speaker 1:A political rally and you're doing jokes like you're in a comedy club. It doesn't, you can't.
Speaker 4:Don't do it.
Speaker 1:I don't know if you guys know this, but there's literally a floating island of garbage in the middle of the ocean right now. Yeah, I think it's called Puerto.
Speaker 2:Rico. I'm going to tell you, that joke kills at comedy clubs. I don't like the joke kills at comedy clubs. I don't like the joke, it kills. And I said to him I don't. It's just like if you're puerto rican and you hear that in the audience, like oh, it's a funny joke, the joke does well. But I said to him I go, dude, that's the one's gonna get you stabbed a political route. Yeah, so that was the one that like really hurt him the I don't even want to kill.
Speaker 3:I can't, I can't no, can I repeat?
Speaker 2:can I repeat what he said? Yeah, for sure. Okay, I'm gonna repeat what he said. So did you see the part? There was a? There was apparently a black guy sitting down like close wearing a hat, like a weird hat, and he's like look at the hat that he's wearing. Whatever he's like, no, that's my friend. We uh had a halloween party.
Speaker 3:We carved watermelons together and I was just like, oh, my god, that's what kill tony does, right, I know, I know just not at a political rally Not at a political rally, but that's the thing. There is Kill Tony. That's like if they invited Orlando Brown and he started doing some weird shit up there, and it's like what the fuck did y'all expect?
Speaker 2:I know, I'm just saying whoever booked him made a huge mistake. Yeah, that was just a poor judgment.
Speaker 3:And If they invited Jeff Ross, there would have been no difference. Like Kill, Tony did what he got paid to do, Exactly no.
Speaker 2:I agree. I don't think that anyone should cancel him. So Trump's been going, he's not going to get canceled. He might have a little shit for a little while, but he's not going to cancel.
Speaker 3:I don't even think he can. But Trump came out and said something you can't give Kill Tony.
Speaker 4:No shit, somebody said there was a comedian, that or something, and I have no idea who it was, never saw him, never heard of him and don't want to hear of him, but I have no idea. They put a comedian in which everybody does. You throw comedians in, you don't vet them and go crazy. It's nobody's fault, but somebody said some bad things. Now what they've done is taken. Somebody that has nothing to do with the party, has nothing to do with us, said something and they try and make a big deal, but I don't know who it is.
Speaker 2:I don't even know who put him in. I mean, listen, I don't want to get all political, even though like election's right around the corner, but like he never takes responsibility for fucking anything, it's your rally. I want to know who signed him to come to Madison Square Garden.
Speaker 4:I, who signed them to come to Madison Square Garden. I want to know.
Speaker 2:Because you know that person. I'm sure Trump has fired that person off the campaign. Listen, if we ever got big enough where we had a Funky Panther event. You better fucking believe we're going to know who's involved and what's going to happen. Okay, I want to know what comedian would you want opening up for our Funky Panther?
Speaker 4:rally Funky Panther. Yeah, funky Panther, rally Funky Panther.
Speaker 2:Yeah, funky Panther rally. Yeah, it's been a while since we got each other on a mishap.
Speaker 1:There's going to be some dude named Cletus Cousinfucker, and he's going to be like all right guys. Hal Hitcher, Hal Hitler. Oh my God, Don't forget to tip your waitresses.
Speaker 2:No, that's the comedian you want.
Speaker 4:I mean, I would laugh.
Speaker 2:What comedian, same what comedian.
Speaker 4:But what? No, legitimately, like a political thing, are we running for office as the funky panther? But I mean, I think you gotta be.
Speaker 2:The three of us are running for president at the same time like I think there's some really good comedians that don't do the shit that tony henscliff does if dave chappelle would have said that, nobody would have bro kill tony.
Speaker 3:I watch kill tony every fucking monday, bro, it's great. I like Kill Tony because I like me personally. I like whenever comedians it don't matter their race, they just going to say whatever they want, right. And I like when Kill Tony make fun of black people because it's like, bro, you fucking you funny as hell for that shit, because you know what, and you can see the people in the background laughing and everything.
Speaker 2:Like it's Kill, I'm gonna ask you this real quick because I I truly believe this. I think you've got two. If you're gonna bring in race into into comedy, right, it's either out of a place of hate or love oh right and you can tell. I think you can tell and like whenever I watch tony, I think it's it's out of a place of love, like he's just roast, like it's just like two friends roast each other right it's not like kramer you know what I mean, like the very two different things.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because I can watch some like facebook clip of some random white dude doing comedy and he's saying some racist shit.
Speaker 2:It's like yeah, but like you listen to the conversation that that tony's having with you, know the individual on the stage and but then you go back and, like for context, you listen to every interaction he's had with anybody, right, and it doesn't matter what you are? He's just gonna he's gonna fuck you up.
Speaker 3:That's what's happening like kill tony, it don't matter like race and abilities handicaps lack of abilities yeah give a fuck, bro, he gonna talk and you know what I like about kill tony. He'd be bringing up like if people done drugs and they're like sober, he'd be like. So tell us about your meth addiction. You had 20 years ago Like fuck bro. Remember how good it felt? No, like literally, I know it's like bro, this guy's fucking crazy, yeah.
Speaker 2:so I mean whoever got Tony on there fucked up. There's a lot of fairly clean comics that could have done like Pete Holmes not that I'm saying he would go do Trump. Well, you've got to find somebody who's willing to, or like Nate Bregazzi or something like that. I'm sure there's pro-Trump type comedians that somewhat fit that realm You've never seen.
Speaker 3:Nate Bregazzi. Is that a white guy? Yeah, of course it is. Let me tell you something, bro. Well, you know what's crazy? Me being mixed race, I only watch black comedians and Mexican comedians. I just can't really get to the white dudes but kill tony's. Funny as fuck to me, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:I like uh, now motherfucker, yeah, but you know what I like.
Speaker 3:That one dude, uh, I think his name is chris de stefano.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's the name, yeah is that his like name, yeah yeah
Speaker 3:I like him but. And then, when he like to all these other dudes that come on to kill tony, I'm like who the fuck?
Speaker 4:is this white guy? But?
Speaker 3:apparently they're like famous and shit, but I was like who the?
Speaker 4:fuck is this rocket?
Speaker 2:man was on one of them, though. Oh yeah, I think his name was like casey rocket.
Speaker 3:Oh yeah, no, no, no, no um the actor that was in how high oh, um, you mean a method man no harlan oh, harlan williams, yeah, he was on the last, kill tony harlan's funny man? He's yeah, and you know what that's. Kill, tony, is how I figure out. These white dudes are funny Harlan.
Speaker 2:Williams, like you don't really see. But who are you going to have? I'm saying like, okay, here's a setup, right, yeah, so somehow just the Funky Panther is running for president, so the three of us are going to be the president.
Speaker 3:Okay.
Speaker 2:Where three collective head makes one body right. Okay, three dudes in a trench coat, three kids in a trench coat, yeah, so we're going to be the president, but what comedian are you getting to do our rally? Sure, I mean, I think that if we're like going legit and we want to be strategic and like politically correct, then, yeah, you go with yourself like a Nate Bergacci or something like that, someone that is hilarious but also knows how to like keep it tame-ish, because I'm kind of with javier, I think louis ck up there.
Speaker 3:Nah, bro, you gotta get shane, gillis yeah, shane gillis is great that's who I think is a funny white guy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's fucking holy I just want him up there just making the face. You know the face, that's all he does. Have you seen his?
Speaker 3:trump impression yeah, bro top dude on kill tony and then the guy who plays dr ph Phil.
Speaker 2:Dr Phil yeah.
Speaker 3:Man bro, I don't care what nobody say, kill Tony, put all these white dudes on Even though they've been famous if it wasn't for Kill Tony, a lot of people wouldn't know about them.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like If it wasn't for Joe Rogan, a lot of people wouldn't know who Kill Tony was. No facts, that's true. Kill tony was through joe rogan podcast. It's wild. What else do you have, tim? That's all I got on those two, but I wanted to ask. So I keep getting fucked up with tiktok shop. Oh, no, timo, what'd you get now? So I bought some new underwear and I'm gonna ask you if you, if, okay, look, that's crazy, here's what. I didn't buy it on tiktok, though. I saw it on tiktok shop and I was like I'm gonna see if amazon's got it, because I wanted it a little bit quicker. Okay, all right, do you fuck with the underwear that separates your?
Speaker 3:shit. Oh yeah, Wait, what do you mean? It's got a little pocket down there.
Speaker 2:They got a little pocket, oh, for your nutsack. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I got a new one. That's not just a pocket for your nutsack, it's got a hole for your, for your, for your stick too. So your stick goes in one pocket and your nuts are in another pocket, so you got two pockets going on down here. Listen, I'll be real with you. How often are you like you just twist wrong?
Speaker 3:are they comfortable? Dude they are so fucking comfortable because you know I'm with you on that.
Speaker 2:You know I'm telling you, you know all of a sudden you're in one pocket and you gotta like you know how many times I have to oh no it's not like that, it's not like that. David Archie. We're not even sponsored. Not sponsored, but David Archie underwear could be David Archie, david Archie, look that shit up.
Speaker 2:So the ad I said is like pocket underwear this is for like they said it's for normal, like if you're normal size, you could probably fit. This is what got Tim and I was like, by the way, he says this, but that was the cell and I was like I'm normal, I'm normal, I love you. But they got different sizes. Let me try. No, no, they just got that one size man and that's the problem.
Speaker 1:You're like you can't fill it out. You're like, oh well, fuck if you're a bigger guy man you're not do they have things like is like one of them.
Speaker 2:It looks like a monkey holding a banana. It's like a little Chiquita banana and that's what you put it in. Or is it like a elephant trunk, but it's just a little bit shorter than it should be. No, it's straight up like it looks like regular underwear, but inside you've got like a hole and then you've got the little cup thing down here. It should be this direction. It's like a hole.
Speaker 1:You know what that reminds me of? There was this kid with the Chappelle show. They were showing pictures of famous people and it was I don't know if you remember in Dave Chappelle they had the player haters ball, yeah, and they had one. They were showing celebrities pictures and they showed one of Rosie O'Donnell's like she looks like she got underwear.
Speaker 2:So here's the thing, though. I remember we had a conversation about this one time do you use the flap in your underwear to piss, or do you go over the top and a lot of people go over?
Speaker 4:no one uses the flap, so I've always been a flat.
Speaker 2:I've always been a flap guy, serial killer. I know you're not wrong. You have to. You have to use the flap no one uses the flap. No on these you have to because you can't just like, because now you're having wrong, you have to use the flap. No one uses the flap. No on these. You have to.
Speaker 2:Because you can't just like, because now you're having to like pull it out of this hole and stuff. It's weird. What is there like trap doors in there? There's trap doors. I'm telling you, the whole thing, the whole thing's wild. I don't get it. I don't get a pot like a. There's a pocket in a pocket on this one.
Speaker 4:I'm telling you this one doesn't have what.
Speaker 2:You just call it like a window, like what is a dick hole? Well, it doesn't have like. So, you know, like the normal one, you just like separate it, right, yeah, this one you gotta pull up. Oh, it's like a, it's like a, it's like the trunk of a car, is it?
Speaker 1:it like the old timey underwear, like gown, where it had the square hole in the back for you to take a shit out of you undo the button? Has anyone ever used those in history? Because I feel like if you're going to take a shit back there, you're going to have shit on your ass and your clothes.
Speaker 3:You would think that would be really popular with the gay community.
Speaker 2:Here's the other thing that's getting me, though. I saw this and I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna buy it. I'm not gonna buy it, okay, but man, like, I'm like. So I'm wearing an adult, I'm wearing a onesie right now oh yeah I'm wearing a onesie, but it's a dickies it's a dickies onesie but they've got short versions of not dickies but like I've been seeing on tiktok, that was a thing like three or four years ago the male rompers they're coming back really, and I was kind of curious about it, but you know you can't be freaky nowadays.
Speaker 3:Man diddy in jail for being free.
Speaker 2:I'm not gonna get him, but like who was it? Thanks a lot did you ruin, was it?
Speaker 3:no, you can't be no freak. No more, tim Was it.
Speaker 1:DJ Envy. That said, ain't nothing wrong with being freaky. He's a freak, yeah, and he's also under investigation for tax evasion. I think he'd be letting his woman Tax evasion's. Okay, though she can do whatever she wants after what he did he cheated on her. He cheated on her. She can do whatever she wants.
Speaker 2:I don't condone cheating all I'm saying is, like tiktok's been, they've been on their game here lately yeah and everybody like, for some reason I guess it's because I've been I actually watch the videos. So now I'm in this algorithm thing, yeah, yeah, and I get stuck in it. And so now I see all these paid advertisements for underwears with dick holes. Exactly now there's another brand and it looks just like the same ones. Like right, that's what happened. So you've been seeing a lot of dick prints.
Speaker 1:They also have that underwear too. They're like oh yeah, if you don't feel like you feel you're mad enough. My boyfriend wears this thing that makes his dick look bigger. What? Yeah, it's, and it's like wear gray shorts with them.
Speaker 2:I'm like build a boat what algorithm are you boys on? I don't know what the fuck?
Speaker 1:I saw this. I didn't go to penis talk. I did not go to penis talk.
Speaker 2:I didn't either, but I also ended up on cartel talk and that's if you haven't been on cartel, talk that shit's wild yeah, it's kind of because different algorithms dude I'm watching this I'm sitting there flipping through here and all of a sudden I see this video of, like, there's a white guy flying a plane and there's a bunch of hispanic dudes in the plane with lots of money, yeah, and all of them wear a mask and all of them have jewelry. Where are they going exactly? And how I ended up on that, that side of tiktok, I don't know. But I've also ended up on prison tiktok too.
Speaker 3:Okay, that's I like prison prison tiktok's actually pretty cool the actual food cooking prison?
Speaker 2:no, no, they're no, they're like well, I've seen that, but they're actually in prison making it so like you got the guy like. So there's one dude that I watched a lot that was like just making stuff, He'd been in or whatever, but now he's out and he's just like acting like he's in and cooking food.
Speaker 2:I think I watched that guy, but I've seen it now. Where they're actually is like it's a cell. They got the metal toilet water fountain going on and they're over there like making them boys in the feds, right they're making real shit.
Speaker 3:They're making food in there and I'm like bachi bro, you know I have a friend like my actual friend I went to high school with. Is is one of them kind of people.
Speaker 2:He went viral and he's in like the penitentiary good like fucking d-lock or whatever, like he was bro, he posted a video of them like fucking making quesadillas and shit yeah, you can make a whole like tv cooking show based off of just that and we're getting a fucking great, and he's just casually posting it dude I love it, I love those videos because they I seen it where.
Speaker 1:Yeah they, they make hibachi like they flip the bed over and off the grates. They just like heat it up and cook their I learned what a stinger is.
Speaker 2:That shit's, that shit's crazy. So they cut like the wire and split it up and that's what they use to heat their water. So they've got, they got some like exposed ass wires and they're just shoving in a cup and heat up the water.
Speaker 1:Man hey man, uh, what is it? Uh, what were you? Macgyver? Yeah, macgyver, that shit, right, that's, that's 100, what, uh?
Speaker 2:what like prison is now? It's like it's like everybody's macgyver and some shit in there. Yeah, I'm here for it bro, my tiktok.
Speaker 3:All I see is people cooking. I see funny ass pranks and I haven't been on prank tiktok what the fuck else do I see on tiktok? I see I watch these like. I guess like streamers they be beefing with each other. I watch a lot of that in 20 versus one TikToks. Oh, I like those it's just hard not to watch sometimes.
Speaker 2:I've been coming across this one streamer. He's been streaming God of War, playing it, whatever, and the dude's kind of a hefty guy and he's got across it. It says God of Fat equals ban, so I guess people were calling him God of Fat or whatever.
Speaker 2:And so I'm of fat equals ban, so I guess people were calling him god of fat or whatever, and so, like I'm just watching to see what people and some of the like, the things that people are coming up with, the like skirt that word it's just funny, so like I saw god of girth. That was a good one. Um, there was another one talking about like how he's like the god of snacks and just random shit.
Speaker 3:I'm like the funniest streamer is this guy named john breaks bad news oh yeah, I want to pay someone.
Speaker 1:I want to pay him, bro, top three have you?
Speaker 2:what have you seen him?
Speaker 3:no, oh bro, you gotta watch that shit he calls this is uh john john breaks bad news.
Speaker 1:Uh uh, funky, wanted you to know that you're a piece of shit and that you rely on your parents too much for their money and, uh, you need to learn how to talk to women and also you have a small dick, yeah, and the person will be like huh, he just calls and like breaks bad news afterwards he'd be like okay, I love you yeah okay love you
Speaker 2:the other one of the other. The other side of tiktok I've gotten on to as well, is family court Okay.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I'll be watching that shit too. It's intense bro.
Speaker 2:It gets wild. So people are like they're going for child custody or whatever, or saying that you need to pay more child support, and sometimes that judge is like what do you mean he needs to pay more child support? He's covering all like their insurance. They're doing all this and all that.
Speaker 3:In fact, I'm actually gonna reduce this and I'm like damn yeah, they do shit like that or they'll like matter of fact, I'm gonna make you pay yeah it's. Yeah, yeah, I watched it.
Speaker 2:You gotta get I know you don't do the tiktok that much. Yeah, no, I don't. But you know, last week we were talking about like ads and things like that that get you and one got me recently.
Speaker 1:Was it a beeria bomb? No, was it get blitzed? It got me those Get blitzed.
Speaker 2:That one gets me every time I've been reposting.
Speaker 1:I've been reposting them. We've all played the game, we've all had a good time.
Speaker 2:We've all got you missed. You missed the mark on that one. Fuck watch football get blitzed. No, so there was uh and I know I'm late to the game here because they've been doing this for a while. I just not been interested dick holes under your underwear.
Speaker 1:No, uh, the mushroom coffee.
Speaker 2:Oh, the mud, are you doing? Mud it was one called overdose or something under dose, something no-transcript, but I was like, but it was a really cool imagery and I'm like, okay, you got my attention Until I clicked on it just to see what it was, because I was actually curious if it actually had caffeine, because it mentioned coffee and it's like, yeah, it has coffee, it's got mushrooms, it's got all this different stuff. Keeps you like your stomach good, but it also still has caffeine.
Speaker 3:I'm like, oh cool, and so I like left it, and then all of a sudden to your point earlier, like I started getting like mud, and like there's 12 other brands that are all doing the same fucking thing. How could they sell that, though, if mushrooms are illegal, but it's?
Speaker 2:not like those mushrooms. No, not those mushrooms.
Speaker 1:Like linesman and shit like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah like the mushrooms that like enhance your mood your, your brain, your gut aren't those still illegal? No, those are the really, those are the non illegal, those are normal mushrooms you get those at the fucking store they don't make you they don't get you high, though they don't like right none of this gets you high.
Speaker 3:That's called brain power, right? How about hornswoggle? You know what? Yeah, they do.
Speaker 2:The wrestler, the midget leprechaun yeah and like, since all these ads came up, I'm like, alright, you know what? I'm gonna go back to the OG. That made me click the first time. So I went on Amazon and got me some whatever the dose thing was alright and I got it today, so I'm gonna check it out tomorrow.
Speaker 4:I'll come back next week.
Speaker 3:I wanna know. I'll let you know how it was. What is it? Brain power?
Speaker 2:so I've seen.
Speaker 3:I've seen the mud like so it's.
Speaker 2:It's like got cacao, so it has like a chocolate taste.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's got water. No, for real that's called mud water. But hey, hold up, is flint michigan's water still it's still fucked up is it really?
Speaker 1:I don't mean to laugh, but like, yeah, flint michigan, hold up. I thought obama said he was gonna fix it.
Speaker 3:How long has it been?
Speaker 2:Years. Actually Is it more than five. Yeah, that's more than five.
Speaker 4:There was a.
Speaker 3:Holy shit. There was a documentary where Everyday Dose I was listening to a Freddie Gibbs song and he said his cousin was still sick from drinking the Flint water and I was like no fucking way.
Speaker 2:This shit's still like that. Shout out to flint everyday dose, so it's called everyday. It's got coffee, mushrooms, collagen, protein and nootropics collagen. Yeah, yeah, you know nicotine's a nootropic right no it is nicotine, like teen, yeah it's crazy how like nicotine is now good for you, dude.
Speaker 2:Okay, so nicotine has always been um nicotine. Nicotine's good for you and I think everybody should be on nicotine, is it really? Yes, it's just addictive. So they're trying to figure out how to make it not addictive. I'm into stuff like that um addictive stuff. So here's what they figured out they found out that actually it helps, uh, preserve the brain and actually help uh, but people with dementia and alzheimer's hell yeah but they're trying to figure out how to make it like.
Speaker 2:How do we make it like not addictive, right, and also not make me like go crazy after about 10 minutes? Yeah, you just have to, you have to just keep doing it. Oh, but I'm I'm gonna tell you, I think, and I tell everybody this like, if you're gonna do nicotine, you should be doing like zins or any of those. Like, yeah, straight nicotine pack, it's just nicotine salt and whatever full flavor thing. It's two things and that's it.
Speaker 3:That shit make you feel some kind of way or something it can make you? I mean, if you don't smoke or don't, I ain't ever smoked a cigarette, yeah, I don't and he gave me one.
Speaker 2:I popped it in I was like, oh, I'm good, this is nice, this is cool.
Speaker 3:And then all of a sudden.
Speaker 1:I was zooming, it will make you I ain from Costco.
Speaker 2:Zip Fizz is pretty good, I don't even drink energy drinks. What the fuck is Zip Fizz? You might not need it. Don't touch any nicotine.
Speaker 3:I don't want to Probably stay away from it. That's why I'm a little confused.
Speaker 2:It's the opposite of what you're trying to go for. Yeah, it's going to make your head spin and you're going to feel weird.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I feel you don't want none of this, do you? That movie's fucking crazy Dude it makes you happy.
Speaker 2:It makes everything so much fun. Food tastes better. You don't want anything to do with this.
Speaker 3:You don't want any of this I like when he was like I think I would like some of that cocaine, like bro, who the fuck says it like that?
Speaker 1:It's so good, it's such a good movie. Yeah, I will say this. So the first this happened.
Speaker 1:I saw this like maybe 25 years ago, 25 years ago or so, at the Grand Plaza, not the Grand Plaza. At the, there used to be a bazaar. I'm not sure if it's still there. It probably is the Lancaster Bazaar, not the Lancaster Bazaar over there off of, over there by a seminary, over there by Hemphill, I don't know, it's over there in the south side, over there by two bucks liquor, um, but they it was like a little bizarre. It was an indoor bazaar and they had like sexy lingerie underwear and it was an elephant mesh underwear where obviously the trunk was like long mesh, that's what I was trying to say earlier, and it had ears on the edge, like here on the ends nice, but I didn't see nothing on the balls, so maybe I mean I was like, oh, I've seen that before.
Speaker 1:But I was like, how do you fit, how, how much meat you got to get in there?
Speaker 2:they just stay hanging low.
Speaker 1:But I was like this guy's fucking crazy but that was that was when I was zoomed in so you could see it okay. Is it the dick hole underwear?
Speaker 2:yeah, this is a dick hole. So you, you've got your underwear, you've got a real nice butt. Uh, you've got just a tiny pocket for the goods and then just a straight up hole. That's just a. That seems like an awkward mix for me. It does seem awkward, and I was.
Speaker 2:I was concerned about it I'm gonna tell you I was concerned about it, but after wearing it, number one, it puts everything just away from your body and I'm as a as a if you don't deal with the, the, that those type of parts you don't know. Oh, I see the quick access fly, but it like, uh, sometimes stuff sticks to your legs and stuff and it's uncomfortable and you get sweaty down there. So here are the benefits and features of the david archie dual pouch for that to me, I'll buy it you've got quick dry ball pouch fabric.
Speaker 2:That's and that's nice. Yeah, you got special room for your private area. You've got support pouch for your ball. It just it just says I mean there's not enough room for both, but you got support for one ball and then a quick access fly. So whenever you got your thing in the hole you just lift it up real quick yeah, exactly, so you can go to the bathroom so that's the that's the weird part, because then, whenever you put it back down, you have to tuck it over that's why, why did?
Speaker 2:the guy that they have in this, like that guy's, packing hard. Why does? Why is he the model? That's what it does. It make you look like you're packing, it does so even medium to small guys that's small.
Speaker 4:You can't do small with that you can't do small, you're going to say medium. You're going to tell us you're medium.
Speaker 2:You got to be a medium.
Speaker 4:I like to say regular.
Speaker 1:Like regular. Do you know where they would get my money, like if I was in high school, if they had like boner protection, where it would keep your boner down.
Speaker 3:If you were having class, oh, for real, I would have bought some. If you were having a class, I might buy some. Now, I don't know, man.
Speaker 1:I'll buy them. Send me that link. I'll buy them and try it out. Yeah, I'll buy one. I'll buy one.
Speaker 2:It's a seven pack for like 20 bucks. Oh, that's actually not that bad See. Look, that's cheaper than fucking.
Speaker 3:Angel.
Speaker 2:Fruit and Lume. I honestly need to reach out to David.
Speaker 3:Archie, at this point, waney and your balls yeah, I need to.
Speaker 2:I need to reach out to david archie your franken beans all I say is that I think tiktok has just become one big ad at this point pretty much, but they're trying to ban that shit.
Speaker 3:What?
Speaker 2:yeah, well, maybe still trying to yeah, if you vote for trump.
Speaker 3:He's banning tiktok I just seen that shit. They said if they got until like a certain amount of time to sell that shit, it's like early next year they'll sell it. It's a wrap. They can sell it to me.
Speaker 2:I'll give it back I'll give it right on back swear to god for five million.
Speaker 3:I don't even want a lot, wow, I just need five. What a nice guy right yeah, that's not bad. You know how much tiktok is worth right now it's stupid and I just want five million yeah, and you can have it back, all rights. I don't even want my name attached to it.
Speaker 2:I don't think that's how it works though they can't have my head that's how it works. You're like I'm gonna, I'm gonna purchase it and I'll own it, but you still do all the things I just got one more thing that I saw that I thought was really, really kind of I swear if it's like fucking butthole underwear. No, it's not even but this is uh, so Russia has fined Google. Okay, oh, so Google has not allowed. They've basically censored Russia's pro-Kremlin propaganda.
Speaker 3:Kremlin, yeah, the.
Speaker 2:Kremlin.
Speaker 1:The dude from Dragon Ball Z. Yeah, that's Krillin man.
Speaker 2:The Kremlin is the Wait. Hold on hold on Wait. Kremlin is like the leadership of Russia.
Speaker 3:Kremlin is like the leadership of Russia.
Speaker 1:Kremlin is not the guy's name from Dragon Ball Z. No, it's Krillin.
Speaker 2:Krillin.
Speaker 1:So you thought his name was Kremlin the entire time?
Speaker 3:Yes, Is that not it? Now, you know I don't watch stuff like that. What was the other?
Speaker 2:word that we found out Squash, squish Squash. It's not I can't remember. Squish.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's not squash, squash, Squash. I squished the shit.
Speaker 4:So Google has fined or the Kremlin has fined Google, and it was like it said.
Speaker 2:Declan, or whatever Declan, or whatever Declan.
Speaker 4:It's more money than it is on earth.
Speaker 2:It's four times trillion, so like trillion, trillion, trillion, trillion, right Trillion, and they find them so much Like obviously it's just bullshit.
Speaker 3:I bet an Arabian dude got that much money. No one on earth has that much money Declan Altogether.
Speaker 2:The world combined does not have that much money, so how would anybody even they're just being assholes. You know what If somebody told?
Speaker 3:me, I owed them a decillion amount of dollars. Like bro, shut the fuck up he's like is that fucking alien money?
Speaker 2:I actually believe that was the response from Google was bro, shut the fuck up, no fucking way the legal response?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I saw that I was just like, but you know they fuck around and nuke this bitch.
Speaker 2:google better pay I looked, I looked at it, I saw that word and I was like I've never seen that word.
Speaker 1:And then they said it was like a trillion plus, you know they've been reading too much fucking harry potter. It's a fucking hogwarts money, did you see also?
Speaker 2:uh, I'm pretty sure it was singapore, singapore. Um. So apple had this thing that they were supposed to. Uh, if Singapore was going to start buying like Apple products, apple had a promise that they were going to start putting money back into something right Like they. They made a promise in order to get their products in the country. Well, they didn't actually fulfill that promise, so now it is actually illegal to use any Apple products in Singapore.
Speaker 4:Like, if you're like a resident, right, okay, travel, or something like that. If you're like a resident, right, okay, traveling, is fine, yeah, whatever, but like yeah.
Speaker 2:Think about all these people that have spent way too much money on these phones and devices and Apple Watches and stuff and now it's like literally illegal. Because, I believe Singapore is one of those places that they'll cane your ass, oh yeah, yeah, cane yeah Like there's a punishment Like they'll beat you with, like a with bamboo cane. Yeah, for like spitting on the ground like it's a very like clean country and if you spit on the ground.
Speaker 3:That's like illegal too like well, I wouldn't want to go to no places like that. It's like if you singapore, if you spit on the ground.
Speaker 2:I think it's like two years in prison or something that's crazy.
Speaker 1:If you're gonna do that, might as well jack off on the floor dude that's a lifetime, that's actually what's funny is that's only 30 days that's crazy.
Speaker 2:Spitting on the ground yeah, it's a really clean country and they have um, they've every every morning. There's like these old ladies that go like legitimately, they go out and sweep. That's how it was in beijing too yeah, so does mexico. Old ladies sweeping their stuff in the morning this is like the whole city they're sweeping, like, yeah, they're sweeping the streets you know, in istanbul, if you like kid a, you go to jail for like 10 years or something like that.
Speaker 1:In where Istanbul?
Speaker 2:I feel like you're just making up that at this point. No, no.
Speaker 1:They worship cats. They got cats everywhere in that city. I think if you, you get a year in prison. If you like, abuse a cat.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like the whole spitting on the sidewalk thing. I mean I believe an American got arrested years ago for spitting gum on the sidewalk and then it was like a big international thing and got caned over like that was his punishment?
Speaker 1:is it just like getting hit in the knees with a cane, or was it like a beat.
Speaker 2:No man, it's like they're gonna whoop your ass. Yeah, they ride your flap off your brand new underwear, saying king instead of cane.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's exactly. All right, all right, let's.
Speaker 2:It's about time to wrap up. You want to plug the too high like social media event anything yet again yeah, too high texas at too high texas and that's tx.
Speaker 3:You don't have to spell it out oh, fancy yeah, tiny session 11 16 november 16th, um 8 to 8 to 11 pm. Um, like I said, you can go buy a ticket. It is a free show, you can. Anybody can pull up for the free.
Speaker 2:We don't have tacos but go support your artists, go ahead and pay that 30 bucks. You get some extra stuff and some free beer you said free beer from martin house.
Speaker 3:Man, you can't beat that shit. Yeah, um yeah, too high texas. I don't even really care to promote myself, just promote the too high texas. We're gonna have all kind of merch, um limited merch. We're gonna have the kelly sparkson merch out uh, hell yeah, I want that, I'm not gonna show the public that yet dude, I'm gonna use that later yeah, but we're gonna for sure have the merch out. Um, I think kinky's coming up.
Speaker 3:I'm not really sure you're cool to see him yeah, so even then, even though it's always lit when he's here yeah um, yeah, we're gonna have a little after party afterwards all right.
Speaker 2:Next time you decide you want to have a too high. I gotta see when, when you free dude, no, well, no, don't fucking do it for me let's have a collab.
Speaker 1:Can we sponsor a team we'd love to like?
Speaker 3:I would love to sponsor a team if we like somehow yeah, I'm down, yeah, funky panther team too high. Fucking. Uh, get bliss shit get stoned.
Speaker 2:That's a. That's a hell of a fucking mashup right there. I'm down for that too, honestly I was talking, I was talking Funky Panther, but yeah, that works too. I'm just going to throw this out there. Expansion pack Dickholes For weed.
Speaker 4:Oh yeah, oh, for sure yeah.
Speaker 2:We got to figure out. The problem is, what kind of games do you want to play, getting high?
Speaker 3:There's only one person now, though, that it's me so you know, sometimes I play little games like I'll be watching the Sopranos, you know, and I'm like every time they cuss, I'm gonna just take a hit every time Tony eats gabagool, I gotta fucking take a hit every time Carmella puts her hand on your hips, I'm gonna take a hit. I just be playing little shit by myself. Yeah, and then I look up and then my girl will be like how many dabs have you took? Don't worry, bud Like 20.
Speaker 2:Well Dank man. Thank you for coming on.
Speaker 4:We appreciate it. It's been too long.
Speaker 2:So good to catch up. If you already do so, please make sure you follow Dank on social media. 2highttx on social media. Yes, sir, also follow the Funky Panther on all things social media. You can find it at thefunkypanthercom Call. Leave a text, leave a voicemail 817-677-0408.
Speaker 1:Also follow Get.
Speaker 2:Blitzed. Yeah, I was going to say that let's go ahead and plug that, let's just follow, get Blitzed. Thank you, no, for real, brian. I keep telling you all the buy the game, you watch football, you like to drink Giblets Games. Stay good everybody.
Speaker 1:I'm Chad, I'm Javier, I'm Tim and I'm Dan, there we go, and we are the Funky Pimper.
