The Funky Panther

Talking to Dogs, Jacking in Space, and Paying $500 to Smell a Celebrity

• Chad, Tim, Javier

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What do you get when three degenerates dig up cringey home videos, debate astronaut nut trajectories, and confess to hoarding junk like emotional support USB cables? Pure, unfiltered chaos—welcome to The Funky Panther.

Javier stumbles upon a camcorder from his hormone-riddled youth and unleashes footage so humiliating it should be classified under the Geneva Convention. Naturally, this spirals into a confessional about the crap we cling to for no reason—shoeboxes, old tech, and probably some repressed trauma. Oh, and let’s not forget the cursed GoPro currently marinating in Lake Texoma that allegedly holds footage too spicy for YouTube.

Then it gets weirder. The guys dive into NASA’s recent astronaut rescue, but instead of celebrating science, they spiral into a fever dream of surviving space madness armed only with early-2000s music videos and a questionable Wi-Fi signal. And yes, we go there: bodily fluids in zero gravity. Spoiler alert—it's not as poetic as Interstellar.

Things heat up when the crew debates whether paying $500 to breathe the same air as a celebrity is dumb or dangerously horny. Plus, they test their sanity with “AI or Insane Person?”—because in 2025, your toaster might be smarter (and sassier) than your last Tinder date.

Is talking to your dog cute, or are we just one step away from marrying Alexa? Find out in this gloriously unhinged episode full of hot takes, cold regrets, and existential dread wrapped in a tortilla of dark humor.

#SpaceJizz #CringeCore #AIvsPsycho #FunkyPantherUnleashed #LostFootage #DigitalDumpsterDive

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Chad:

roll up to the club in my 1964, gopro and the day that we all blacked out. There were some, there were some topless girls on the video, and I never downloaded that video footage. Y'all know about this story, right? Sure, and where's that camera now?

Tim:

I know exactly where that's at it's in Lake Texoma, it's in the bottom of Lake Texoma. So Contra dancing with you, I think a bit of cocaine Contra dancing with you. Okay, okay, ready, yeah.

Chad:

Get in here, we gotta start the show. We gotta start the show, oh. We gotta start the show oh hello everyone and welcome to the Funky Panther coming to you from Fort Worth Texas. We have got a show for you here on episode 194. So sit back, relax, enjoy, let's get into it. I'm Chad, I'm Javier and I'm Tim.

Javier:

And we are the Funky Panther.

Chad:

I don't like that.

Tim:

I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is the voice of God.

Chad:

Dude, if God was Tim, I'd have, I think, you. You know I'd ask for other options this is the voice of god sound like big. Tex is what you sound like.

Tim:

This is big welcome to the state fair of texas you really fucking do.

Chad:

Actually that's pretty funny, that's great howdy partner, howdy folks it's howdy folks. Howdy partner. Howdy folks, it's howdy folks.

Tim:

Is it? I don't know.

Chad:

I think it's howdy folks. That's what I heard on the radio.

Tim:

Anyway, what's up everybody? I never said I was a smart God, I'm a vengeful God.

Chad:

I am a vengeful.

Tim:

God, kiss the ring.

Chad:

You know, we've never talked about religion on this show.

Tim:

I don't want to get into it on this episode.

Chad:

But I kind of want to talk about it sometime. Should we talk about it sometime? Is that too much of a?

Tim:

It depends on what you want to.

Chad:

Is that too?

Tim:

taboo. What do you want to accomplish with it? Do we want to dispel the rumors of religion? Do we want to get smited?

Javier:

Smited. Is that what it is? I think it's smote.

Tim:

You want to catch these hands.

Chad:

I just want to have an open, semi-intelligent dialogue about it.

Tim:

Do you think lightning is God's hands?

Chad:

No, I think God's hands would be God's hands. You'd know when that shit's coming.

Tim:

you know there's no one coming back from a I don't know if you would Just out of nowhere Pow, you're not coming back from. Uh, I don't know if you would just out of nowhere you might come back from lightning. You're not coming back from it, you're right. So, yeah, hey, um, are y'all watching? Uh, y'all, y'all watch the righteous gemstones.

Chad:

No I haven't watched the second episode, I only watched the first one of the of the first.

Tim:

Okay, the first. Yeah, yeah, okay, cool, you're not. I've never seen.

Chad:

No, the first episode, the new season oh, I haven't any of the.

Tim:

We're on the first season still.

Chad:

No, we're in the second season.

Tim:

I think now I can't remember you got to watch it. You don't watch any of it.

Javier:

I've never watched that.

Tim:

I think you're going to enjoy it.

Javier:

I've never watched Vice Principals.

Chad:

I've never watched Eastbound and Down, eastbound and down for me, and then righteous gemstones, and then way down at the bottom is vice prince. I never watched vice principles it was not good.

Javier:

Danny mcbride it's crazy, because I love those two dudes. Yeah, they are the best walter goggins and, uh, danny mcbride.

Chad:

Okay, right and danny and those two together like in baby billy. Yeah they're great, they're great and then, uh, what's his name? Walter goggins right, he's also in the new season of um shit, uh, damn it. I blanked. It's one of the hotels the hotels yeah, there was one in hawaii, then there was one oh uh, the white lotus white lotus.

Chad:

Thank you, uh, and he's great in that one too. Uh, I just like him, he's. I think he's kind of become one of my favorite actors. He's great in that one too. I just like him. I think he's kind of become one of my favorite actors.

Javier:

He's really funny. I will say that he's righteous. You need to watch it. I do.

Tim:

I think that you would get a kick out of it, especially growing up. It's not based in Texas, but it really feels like it's based in Texas because it's got that whole element of like Kenneth Copeland, yeah, which grew you, which, growing up here, is right down the street from us, basically.

Chad:

Definitely Southern. Yeah, I want to say it's in Savannah. That sounds about right.

Tim:

But it's that whole megachurch craziness. I catch the tail end of it whenever I'm about to watch Last Week with John Oliver. What's interesting about it is there's bits of it that seem like I get elements of not Breaking Bad. But what is that one Ozark. Oh yeah, so you get little bits of this Ozark, but then, as it starts to get kind of serious, it gets really fucking stupid. But then back to serious. It's wild.

Chad:

I did expect for better things, because there's so many good actors and actresses in that that show like the dude from workaholics. Hilarious adam divine right, yeah, he's.

Tim:

Is it divine or devine? Whatever, I think it's divine okay he, he's fucking hilarious I thought it was devine and jesse and I were talking about it, but he is, he is funny it.

Chad:

And then is it. Is it john goodman?

Tim:

is that john goodman? John Goodman, john Goodman.

Chad:

He's great in everything he's ever done, he is. You know, and the sister in that one, she cracks me up.

Tim:

Like her character, which I don't know much about her.

Chad:

I don't either, but she's been in comedies before that. I've seen and it's kind of a similar character, but she does a great job with it. I feel like it's a pretty stacked show, yeah, so yeah, and then the kid, you know the younger boy or whatever. He's been in some shit too and I can't remember they were all kind of like, nah, he's in that, oh cool.

Tim:

But he's all right. So, Javier, you brought us these Elote things for QT.

Javier:

Let's try these later. I don't feel like.

Tim:

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we're trying them now. We're trying them now.

Javier:

You get the full boy. I'm not going to eat the full boy, I'm just going to. I saw these at QT.

Tim:

So I tried it once. I haven't had them. I haven't had them again, but this is QT's attempt at Mexican food.

Javier:

This is like their elote taquito Mexican food. It looks terrible. They even put the burn marks to look like corn.

Chad:

When you go back to Mexico to see your family, is this what they feed you? This is what they feed us.

Javier:

This is from the motherland. This idea was taken from abuelas everywhere. So if you are fresh from the border and you want a bite of home, then go to QT for their elote taquitos.

Tim:

It's supposed to be Mexican street corn in there, and then the dusting is hot cheetos. I'm scared to bite it and eat it. Have you not tried it?

Javier:

yet? No, I haven't, I just tore the tip off.

Chad:

It's not good, it's not bad. Tell us your take, and then we'll give you ours. It's going to disappoint you as the resident Mexican? What do you think about your elote taquito? You look disgusted.

Tim:

I'm so disappointed, so I'm going to tell you the problem with it. I'm so fucking disappointed. There's no cheese. There's no tajin or chili powder or anything. You're supposed to get the spicy from this, but it's not there it needs cheese and diced jalapenos is what it needs. And there's no tapatios in it. There's no tapatio. There's no. What is it Valentina? There's no Valentina.

Chad:

It tastes like a not-so-good cornbread.

Tim:

Where's the mayo? It's more sweet than it is spicy, like I hate mayo, but I love mayo. There's no like limon.

Chad:

Either way, man, we appreciate you. It's the thought that counts.

Tim:

You know, who's got pretty good elote that one gas station up there off of Hull.

Javier:

City yeah.

Tim:

Which one's that it's got the tacos? Fuel City, yeah, fuel City, they got decent elote.

Chad:

You know I keep saying that I still like their tacos too. Are they off? They take Mexican tacos at the best. Absolutely not. No but they're pretty fucking good for gas station tacos.

Tim:

Breakfast tacos are great, dude, come on. The Elote is good. The only other place that I like the Elote from is from I think it's like El Rancho, over off of like Felix. They have a little Elote guy that's out there Is his name Felix. Yeah.

Chad:

Let me go see.

Tim:

Felix on Felix. So you're really disappointed with this.

Javier:

Huh, I'm very disgusted. How dare QT.

Chad:

Look, I'll be honest with you. That's how I felt the first time Sarah and I split one, and we were like all stoked about it and we're both like aw.

Javier:

Kind of disgusted. That's very I'm, very you want it to be good.

Tim:

So we're talking about qt, qt taquitos for a minute. Their chicken taquitos are are great, amazing. They have a good spice to them, they have flavor.

Javier:

They're nice, their chicken their chicken dicks are amazing chicken dicks so I saw somebody.

Tim:

They said this is a hack that you gotta do. Okay, I've been wanting to do this, but I've never. I've never done it. But you take the chicken dick, which, for those who don't know what a chicken dick is, it is the buffalo, the buffalo chicken roller thing yeah put that in a hot dog bun, oh, and then put your, put their chipotle sauce, stuff on top of that sauce is bomb.

Chad:

Yeah, I, I had andrew bring me a bottle that one time so I could just have it at home because it's so good.

Tim:

Yeah, yeah, it's good and it's shelf stable, so is their ranch. Their ranch is great and it could sit on the shelf. It doesn't. I think it expires. Maybe I don't know.

Chad:

We'll never know. You don't have to refrigerate it though. We'll never know, but those are good Our tacos Brisket tacos are okay, it's almost like they're trying to be like Bucky's a little bit, because I think this is later, but they're pretty good.

Tim:

The chicken tacos are just bland. You got to put salsa on there. Oh, I like the brisket. I will say they fell short on. They put out this like orange chicken taquito one time.

Chad:

Oh yeah, that one was gross too. It was sweet, it was like too sweet.

Tim:

Yeah, it was weird, a chicken dick. That was not the spicy one they had, like a Parmesan one they tried for a little bit, I never had that one. Oh, that was pretty good. Other than that, I mean, I had their meatball sub.

Javier:

They have a meatball sub.

Tim:

They have a meatball sub now. Wow, I think Firehouse Sub's got the better meatball sub, and then.

Javier:

Cheapahut's got the Supreme.

Chad:

I haven't had a meatball sub from chiva hut.

Javier:

It's good choke on has the best meatball subs, I say choke on it, choke on this dick. That's what that's.

Tim:

Choke on this dick all right, but uh, is that the joke?

Chad:

it was a joke I thought you're being serious, like what the fuck did you just choke on?

Javier:

yeah, it's, it's uh, I have it I have a little reminder do the choke on these nuts joke today at 815.

Chad:

Smart Dude use your reminders wisely.

Tim:

That was good, that was good.

Chad:

They also have like their pizzas are pretty good. Like they had this like buff, not Buffalo. I guess right now they have a Buffalo chicken. They've been doing like a monthly change out.

Tim:

Yeah, their pizzas are pretty solid, they're really solid.

Chad:

Chicken, bacon, ranch, pizza last month or two months ago, something like that, and pizza last month or two months ago something like that, and we we got a piece just to try it out and it was pretty fucking good. I was sad I was gonna go back and get a whole pizza and I never did and now it's gone. But my favorite thing at qt, aside from the chicken- dick, because that's my favorite um their breakfast pizza.

Chad:

We'll get like a personal breakfast pizza and split it on a weekend after like maybe went out for a couple drinks the night before something, it is the best I got burned out on the breakfast pizza and I'm trying to get back into it because it's been.

Tim:

It's been a few years, but how often you go to qt you have to understand every day. It's like right by, yeah, it's like right there. I mean, you can just walk, I do walk, okay, and now I usually just get a energy drink or whatever, or I'll get coffee or something, but previously to that, whenever I was on the ambulance still full time which I'm gonna be back on there pretty soon um, where you just hang out and fucking qt parking lot oh yeah, so you just eat, you know, and there's nothing better nothing wait.

Chad:

Yeah, eat and wait. What'd you?

Tim:

do today ate and wait. I would uh start my day and I'd get one of those. I ate that like almost every single shift for like almost a year breakfast pizza yeah, oh yeah, and then I was just like I can't do things that often I'll get burnt out real quick, I probably have one once a month if that.

Chad:

But yeah, I mean they were good.

Tim:

And then you put if you put a little, you put the hot sauce on there.

Javier:

Oh, I have not put the hot sauce on there I'm still thinking about this trash, oh yeah I'm sorry, buddy it's okay, you were, you were, you were hope, you were hopeful I was well, I mean, I saw it and I told the guy I'm getting kind of toasty.

Chad:

It was a sweet boy thing of you to do. I was like.

Javier:

You know what I'm going to get some. I asked the guy first how he liked them.

Chad:

And he said I don't.

Javier:

He's like they're different and I'm like okay, and then I was like. That should have been your cue. I was like I'm going to you tell me how you liked them.

Chad:

So he knew so he knew.

Tim:

He knew Obviously Fucking guy, but no, he's. I mean the QT guys can't talk shit about their food.

Javier:

Yeah, of course not. I mean, I wouldn't expect Jared to like bash them.

Tim:

Well, he can now Other Jared? Oh yeah, Other Jared can't, yeah Well.

Chad:

I mean, like that time was stellar this time you know you can't hit them all.

Javier:

Those were solid. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I could kill for a Post Malone cookie.

Chad:

Right, that sounds fucking great. All right, javier, what have you been up to the past couple of weeks?

Javier:

Brought Cleaning. Cleaning, that's nice. We cleaned the had a tiptoe around there and we got up like maybe 40 of the stuff out of there is it from when?

Chad:

she?

Tim:

like moved, yeah, still, yeah, oh, it's not just from when she moved, and my stuff too and you're hoarding?

Chad:

yes, oh well, yeah, you probably moved a lot of stuff out into the garage.

Javier:

Yeah, yeah I had a bunch of shoe boxes in there and, um, I had a. I have one of those sawzalls, the uh milwaukee sawzall. That's like a, it's a saw it's a saw yeah so and I was, I was like taking my time cutting in half, and then I did something and I stepped on a box and it flattened and I'm like why?

Chad:

aren't I doing this, and I started stepping on all the boxes. You were cutting boxes with sawzall yeah instead of just stepping on boxes.

Javier:

Yeah, okay which you know took, like I could have probably done like four to one, and so then, have you ever seen the person who will use anything but a screwdriver?

Chad:

No.

Tim:

To screw something in. I feel like that's you, though Really it's just. You know there could be a screwdriver there, but you're going to use anything other than I just want to have fun Pocket knife, butter knife, sawzall, cut up some boxes.

Javier:

It's kind of like the scene from garden state, where he like returns the knives and he's like why are you returning these knives? Because because they won't cut cans. It's like what do you mean? They won't cut cans? On the commercial they show the guy cutting the cans and they're just not cutting them. It's like well, you want to just explain, exchange them out.

Tim:

And he's like yeah, I just, I just don't want it.

Javier:

I don't want it. You know it's kind of that same situation. But yeah, I just stepped on the boxes. I was like, okay, fuck, cool, let's throw everything in the truck and it's trash day. Finally at the shop and I just threw all the shoe boxes in there and god damn, there's a lot of shoe boxes. I bet like, holy fuck, like these are for like shoes I wear. Like actually no, I'm not, really don't wear most of them.

Chad:

What do you do with the shoes? Do you have like a like?

Tim:

casing. I have a room, okay, no, but I'm surprised you got rid of the boxes for the shoes.

Javier:

I mean, they're shoes I'm not going to get rid of. Okay, like I'm going to keep them, okay. So I mean the other stuff, hey, speaking of which. Okay, so we were cleaning, right. And so my dad kept like these cupboards, cupboards like these fuck, what do you call them? Treasure chests, like no big fucking cabinets for clothes and shit.

Chad:

Okay.

Javier:

And one of them had like a camera and then a camcorder, like a mini eight camcorder or high eight camera and I remember I had one. I had a um, I had a tape that I had from high school and I was like it was just there. I found it and I was like oh cool, I don't have anything to play with yeah and so I tried to turn on the camera and it wouldn't work.

Javier:

and so then I was like, well, the battery's just dead, I can't find the charger. I ordered a charger, I charged it and I put the tape in. The tape was from it was 03, so it was junior year, our junior year, yeah, and I was looking at it and I was so embarrassed. I was so embarrassed because I had it during during school, during high school. I was, you know, recording stuff with my friends and stuff like that. Not you guys, I didn't see. I friends and stuff like that. Not you guys, I didn't see. I don't think I saw any of you guys in the video. I was in the basement, you know, they had the basement classrooms and I was just doing dumb shit. And then the next, it was maybe 20 minutes of that, and then 10 minutes no, 20 minutes of Mexico Me with my cousin. We were in Mexico and the entire time was just me and my cousin zooming in on girls' butts and I'm just like, what the fuck is this Like? Obviously I'm a fucking degenerate.

Javier:

when I was a kid, I still am Not quite, but I was like cringing at myself just watching this tape and I was like, oh, this, I'm never gonna show anybody this. And then some more cringy shit. I'm like why was I like this? And I was like I hate myself right now. I really hate myself. So that's, that's what I did.

Chad:

Don't be embarrassed oh no, it's, don't be embarrassed it's I.

Javier:

I want to burn the tape if it wasn't for the high school bits in it, like of my friends as children. You know, we were like 17 years old.

Tim:

I'm going to be real. Yeah, I took a video camera, my parents' video camera, to like one of the last days of school, maybe junior year.

Javier:

Yeah.

Tim:

And I'm pretty sure, like I was trying to get people to flash me and all sorts of stuff, I don't know. I was gonna ask something, but I don't want to ask it, and like I'm pretty sure like I was doing the whole like girls gone, like trying to do girls gone wild right and and and now knowing what I know now, like that's highly illegal because we were all underage yeah, so that almost kind of maybe happened in Jamaica a little bit.

Chad:

I had a GoPro and the day that we all blacked out there were some topless girls on the video and I never downloaded that video footage. Y'all know about this story, right? And where's that camera now?

Tim:

I know exactly where that's at. It's in Lake Texoma. It's in the bottom of.

Chad:

Lake Texoma. So you know someone maybe find some really nice video someday of some ladies in Jamaica.

Tim:

I've always I want it because you knew. You knew exactly where it was.

Chad:

Yeah.

Tim:

I know exactly where it is. You know exactly where it dropped in the lake. But that lake is so muddy where it dropped in the lake, but that that lake is so muddy like it's gone, gone, I mean it's gone, but people get down there with the. I mean it's been some years now, but people get down there with the uh, with the, what's it called?

Javier:

you know the metal detectors and find shit all the time.

Tim:

I mean we could rent some scuba equipment and yeah go into pitch black is it worth it? Absolutely not but do we do it for the bit?

Chad:

I mean, that's uh, that's all question I'll do that as soon as javier gets those sex tapes that his dad made.

Tim:

Once he finds those and we watch you get us, uh, for this, for the viewers. Uh, you get us, uh, 200 more subscribers, and chad and I will don wetsuits and we'll go into that lake and we will find I kind of have an idea where it was kind of where it was we were coming along the it was on the curve.

Chad:

Yeah, right before the inlet.

Javier:

Yeah, that's when we flipped, yeah in the canoe but you have to think somebody has gone scubaing in there no, no, no one's going diving in a lake that murky it's so murky you can't see.

Tim:

The only time you dive there is when you're finding cars have been abandoned in the lake and dead bodies man.

Chad:

We would be going down underwater and just hoping that we touch something, and then have the metal detector and listen for beeps, because you can't see a foot in front of your face.

Javier:

There's no clarity in that so disappointing, so disappointing, but you know what?

Tim:

My bag was one of the bags that flipped into the water. And guess what? All my stuff was dry. You know why?

Javier:

because you had one of them, wet bags, no, no, no, no, no.

Tim:

I put all my sleeping bag and everything into trash bags and tied them up I do remember that my brother told me to do that and I was like that's a, that's a good idea. I've got like five different dry bags now so you know if I could go back in time I think you fuckers were sleeping in wet things yeah, um, but yeah that.

Javier:

And then a couple weeks ago I was over. I think I already talked about this.

Chad:

Uh, the visit fort worth thing oh yeah, I think I talked about that last no, that was, I think I did.

Javier:

Yeah, you did I did because I brought up uh benzie yeah and so, um, you know, we're gonna set that up and hopefully next episode.

Tim:

Yeah, we got Benzie coming on. And then, you know, our buddy, kevin Casillas, reached out to me.

Chad:

Oh cool.

Tim:

And you know he does the body harvesting, body part harvesting, or whatever. The donors and all that stuff. And April is donor awareness organ donor awareness month.

Chad:

I thought you were going to say body part awareness month. For some reason, body part awareness month, that's a weird month and he would like to.

Tim:

so one of his tasks at work is to spread awareness of that. And he was like he just hit me up. He's like, hey, do you think we could come on, I come on, shoot the shit but also spread awareness of being an organ donor. And I'm like, if he brings. Okay, kevin, you got to bring tacos.

Javier:

You're always welcome, Kevin. We'll just fuck with you.

Tim:

Yeah, so I think we'll have Kevin come back on for a little bit and tell us all the news about that, I guess.

Javier:

Yeah, nice, we got some things planned. Yeah, it's going to be a fun summer it's different, for sure. So cleaning and that's it Cleaning.

Tim:

I can't think of anything else. That's pretty much it. I did ask so do y'all keep your boxes of like random things, not just shoes.

Chad:

But I'm talking like, uh, you get a new cell phone, yeah, you keep the box I've got a um, you know, those cubes that you put like the container, cubes that you put in the drawers, whatever. I've got a cube full of watch boxes.

Tim:

So, like all, my, so I understand the watch boxes right, because you know, someday I'll either give them away jesse doesn't understand that.

Chad:

But, like, the box adds value to the watch right, and then I do also for all my like high-end electronics, like my apple watch, my iphone, my ipad.

Tim:

Um, not just apple stuff either, though, but like other electronics, I can't think of any on the top of my head, but I kept them for a long time and I got rid of all those I honestly think that I did too recently, but I had them like, I've moved with them twice and I think I just recently got rid of them why do we do this?

Chad:

because you never know like, honestly, I do it. For the same reason he does it with shoes. It's like you might sell them and you want them to have the whole package. You get more money for it and it comes in a nice. This is basically new or is new and be done with it. That's why I do it. Okay.

Tim:

Same with the watches yeah, I just do it because I think it's a trait that I have, so you just do it to do it, dude, I think it's just part, I think it's part of one of the weird things that I just do. Man, is there like a price?

Chad:

that you like. I'm gonna keep this because there's a price to it, or you just do it on all things no, it's just all things, man.

Tim:

I mean, like box got to keep that bitch, all right, cape random cables, I do that I have so many listen, listen. I was cleaning out shit and I found rca, like the rca cables, the cables you use to hook up like a vcr to a tv. That's got like the three, you know, the white, yellow and red those hoes away bro. I don't even have a TV that has those connections.

Javier:

I tried to, because the camcorder came with that. It was a monster set, and so I tried to hook it up in the back of the TV, and it didn't have it.

Chad:

And.

Javier:

I tried to hook it up in the Bose and it didn't have that either there's an adapter, though. There is. I mean it was an AV to HDMI. Yeah, but I mean at that hdmi, yeah, yeah, but I mean but I found like random, those random things, uh, a power supply for an xbox, that I don't even own anymore. I found my well in in the mess is my old xbox 360 and I'm like does this still work? Like should I?

Tim:

did you get the red ring of green ring of death?

Javier:

well, because I I had it switched out twice because of the red ring yeah and um. After that I think I bought a ps3 or four and I stopped playing it, but I still have my games. I have a controller. Um, I gotta find.

Tim:

The problem is I'm turning into my fucking dad. That's the problem. Yeah, is that. I remember growing up he had like coax cables for shit. He had these cables for shit. They had a, a container. You know those uh tins that you thought they would be cookies? Yes, yeah, it was a tin that would. They had cookies in at one point. I thought it was a. They had a container. You know those tins that you thought they would be cookies? Yes, it was a tin that had cookies in it at one point I thought it was a Mexican thing.

Javier:

only no, no, no.

Tim:

It transcends all races, I believe.

Javier:

Racism is over everyone.

Tim:

But you open that up and it's got like random screws, nuts bolts, just random shit, and I'm like I have to dig through what looks like probably 300 different screws to find one that would work. You know, yeah, why do I keep all this random shit? You never know.

Chad:

My mom just made Mike, get rid of two drawers full of screws, nuts, bolts, whatever, and I get the point. It's like I might use these someday. But also they're so stupid cheap. Like, are you really yeah? That's true, so but then they just threw it away. I was like you could have like sold it to a scrapyard like that was probably 20 pounds of metal you know?

Tim:

so g's saying that he won some stuff she she, what she she? That's not rg. Okay, let's say she okay, okay, so just g, it just says g, I said g we had a conversation uh, oh, that's what else I did. I went to, I'm saying g said uh, I won stuff at an auction lots of 60s, 70s and 80s stuff still in the box that's good.

Javier:

Right there, that's wild. That's different though, because that's stuff you can sell?

Tim:

yeah, but if you open it you're gonna have 70s air that's gonna hit you in the face. It's like what if it's like a tomb and you know people just start dying all of a sudden you get some weird fucking curse.

Chad:

You know that actually happened, I know. Yeah, they opened a tomb and people just started dying, people that, like breathe the air that's crazy.

Tim:

That's what's gonna. Let us be careful that's so.

Javier:

That's another thing I did. I went dude, you're a dude, she's a dude that's the whole thing, dude.

Tim:

Transcends all. All right, okay, okay no backpedaling motherfucker um I said g, I didn't say she.

Javier:

I didn't say dude, I said he, you said he, I said g, you said hey, look, replay it we'll go back and listen.

Tim:

This is recorded.

Javier:

Go back and listen um, but we, we went to. Uh, ernie's cypher show last.

Tim:

Saturday.

Javier:

Not this Saturday, but the Saturday before.

Tim:

It was a lot of fun seeing it. What's a Cypher show?

Javier:

It's Cypher. Bet back in the day had this thing during the awards shows called the BET Cypher and they always had different sections with different crews from East Coast, west Coast, midwest, nerdy, south. Then we're talking about around the world. I got phones and retirement homes and teenagers and little bitty boys and girls knocking lyrical bombs up in your hood non-stop and I'm headed to the block. Explode. Hip-hop, r&b, pop-tart, what you want. I gotta leave. Rock and roll yeah, I'm sorry that was ludicrous, wow, but they, they had different sections of uh of the united states. You know, like I was saying Like who was it? I think the best one had to be like Ice Cube and his kid.

Tim:

Okay, but it was representation.

Javier:

Representation, and so it's people just coming together to freestyle.

Tim:

Yeah, just like short sets. That's what this was.

Javier:

It was really like a lot of fun. There's a couple artists that we ran into J-Boy over there and he is producing now, so he's making beats for some of these artists that are performing and it's a matter, it's a way of these artists to meet people like J-Boy or people that are trying to have connections in the music industry when it comes to either production or maybe even representation. So it really like a lot of fun. And and ernie's, you know he's big in the community when it comes to um bars, right and, uh, crazy bars all right, crazy bars, I heard yeah yeah, bars still matter, you and me bars do still matter.

Javier:

So that was fun. I had a lot of good times.

Chad:

It was good talking to jay boy. Like you were already there for a while so you probably got to talk to him for a bit, but like he was talking about the old D&D shit again. Yeah Fuck, that was so much fun it was fun.

Tim:

The problem with it is like we're all pulled so thin. Oh, I know, and that was the issue. Would you do that?

Javier:

instead of this? Would I do that instead of this? I don't know, I don't know, that's tough. I want to play again. I do want to play again, and we talked about him. He's opening a studio up, um in arlington yeah oh close to the stadium.

Javier:

So, um, if he has a uh opening party, I'd love to go to that too, and he's even having having a space for for um, podcasting also, so if anybody. We have a couple friends I know I've got some friends that are looking into getting into podcasting, so places like that is a must when it comes to people opening, including our friend Paul. You know he has his stuff over here too and he's got brand juice.

Chad:

Yeah, all the content he's been putting out has been pretty good for brand juice.

Tim:

My favorite one was the dude in the back of the truck.

Chad:

Yeah, in his truck. That's funny. You'll be a customer for life. That was good, paul.

Tim:

That was good, all right, chad. Anything notable? Anything.

Chad:

Went to that. That was great. That night was also what do they call it? Lost in Sound over there on South Main Area.

Javier:

Yes, but I thought they canceled it because of the wind or the rain. No, or it was J-O-E's show over there. Yeah, his did.

Chad:

They did cancel that yeah but we went to Nickel because it hadn't been there in a while, ran into Colleen and Ben Hadn't seen them in a long time, went over to Hop, and then there was some music there, some really good musician there. For there was some music there, some really good, uh, musician there. Forgot the name, though, and then that's when we went to go meet you up at tulips and then we ended the night at down and out and everybody was there, including um joseph aiella was there oh hell, the guy that we had on.

Chad:

Yeah, panther city or panther, yeah panther city tattoos yeah uh, he was there looking buff and mean like a motherfucker, uh, but yeah, it was fun, it was cool, it was a good night. Um, I don't think I've done anything else other than that, except for this weekend. We, we flew up to chicago for saint patrick's day. Uh, a couple of weeks ago actually, I think it was the same weekend that we went no, it was two weeks ago. Um, we, we were drinking and we're like I really want to do chicago.

Chad:

I want to see the green river. I've always want to see the green river in chicago for saint patrick's day, and so we booked a last minute flight and went and it was. It was fun, except the weather in chicago was more bipolar than our shit. Like day one was 60s, it was perfect. Um, it was a little dusty, kind of like it was dusty here on friday, remember they were like oh, the west texas dust except the west texas dust didn't make it to chicago, so I don't know why it was dusty up there.

Chad:

And then it was crazy Like it was so packed, Like the whole city, Like it wasn't even like Mardi Gras. It was like Mardi Gras on crack.

Tim:

It was obnoxious. I mean Chicago was a big, I mean big St Paddy's Day, big Irish yeah.

Chad:

Yo, there wasn't a single bar that didn't have a line around the block, and I'm not just saying this or making shit up, I'm talking an entire line around the block just to get into these bars, like no, thanks, it's an experience, but that sounds absolutely miserable, right.

Chad:

Yeah, I won't do it again, just like I may or may not do Mardi Gras again, like you do it once. It's like cool, I did it, but we did. The next day it snowed super hard, which is crazy because again bipolar, and so we did some stuff. We had brunch and went to go see the Bean because Brittany and Brent had never been to Chicago, but I never really hung out in Wrigleyville like over by Wrigley Stadium ballpark, whatever.

Javier:

Wrigley.

Chad:

Field, wrigley Field Stadium? I don't know. Cuck stadium, I don't know. Uh, oh, whoa, you sit in your cuck chair. There's a cuck right there, uh, but we, like bar, hopped.

Javier:

There was a rabbit hole there, random I was gonna say isn't there like a? I feel like, um, uh, what's his name? Should have a bar over there. Uh, fucking tober, I just feel like tober in chicago that would be a very tober place like the bars were really cool, really chill.

Chad:

They had a pop-up. It was called charmed, kind of like what tober does with halloween and, dude, honestly, jordan. We need to do a fucking saint patrick's day pop-up theme thing. But this place was nuts like they had clouds with with rainbows and the whole place was like really done up it. It was pretty neat. That was it. It was fun. Just drank a lot over the weekend, saw the Green River. Weather was obnoxious.

Javier:

Did you go to Mr Beef, or what's that sandwich? No, no.

Chad:

The city was packed and we just kind of hung out downtown because, again, they hadn't really seen much. Next time I'd like to actually stay in wrigleyville and then, if we want to go to chicago, take the train, come back. But I want to see more of chicago, not just downtown, because it's all right, it's good, it's great, especially the first couple times you've been.

Tim:

But there's more to it okay yeah, I went, um, I went over to hd supply, uh monday actually and uh, so my, I talked about this, uh, one of the last episodes. Uh, my boy uh uh, steven, got out of uh out of jail and exonerated and all this other stuff. He's got some stuff that's happening now, um, things, crazy things anyways. Uh, it was kind of like a welcome home party, uh, welcome back to texas. Uh, so big, big group showed up over at HG Supply. I've never really gone there other than for the boozy popsicles whenever we ride the river.

Tim:

Beefy boys, but I would go back there again and eat in a heartbeat. Dude, they have these killer bison meatballs. So what I did was I got the bison meatballs, I got their uh sweet potato hash and some brussels sprouts. Dude, fan, fucking tastic. It was so good. Um, yeah, I did that on uh monday.

Tim:

So they're vegan quesos legit and they've also got like a poke bowl I saw the poke bowl, yeah I thought about getting that, uh, but yeah, I mean, that's pretty much all I did was was do that, jesse and I, we, we went to the dump and threw some shit away dumped. Yeah, we're just trying to clear, we're just trying to clear out our lives here and just get rid of, uh, rid of things, whatever. So, uh, nothing too crazy man. Um, school's school and it's kicking my ass. And I added an extra class for a seven week class, which is stupid.

Chad:

So are you on your second eight-week group.

Tim:

So I do traditional semesters but I'll sometimes throw in like, and so this one was a thrown-in seven-week class. So how many classes are you doing this semester? Total three, okay yeah, so two traditional semesters, one short one, and then on top of that paramedic program that I'm also doing so yeah, there's a lot, a lot of shit going on.

Javier:

Right now I'm looking at gladys's stuff that she has on there and this is good though old shit, that's some. God damn you got all this shit.

Tim:

So that clears everything up, uh, while javier's looking through that, um, all right, so I want to jump into a couple topics that I think we should hit on. So in the news, if you all keep it up with it, our astronauts have been rescued. Finally, after what?

Javier:

Nine months, nine months up there.

Tim:

Nine months in outer space, stuck up there because of Boeing's shitty designs.

Javier:

Dude, first of all, why did they do this? I mean, they tested it right, but the whole situation of them like they had shit breaking.

Tim:

Like it got up there and started breaking and leaking shit. I felt like I was watching Apollo 13 all over again Shit.

Javier:

I want to check and see if the technology of that entire thing, if there's more stuff in this phone than obviously computing power.

Tim:

I mean it might be the case. I bet you your phone's more indestructible compared to the Boeing spacecraft.

Javier:

Dude, that's just for like nine months, yeah, but stuck up there for nine months.

Tim:

I can't imagine being up there and just being. I'd be so stir crazy.

Chad:

Yeah, so did you see like a comparison with what they look like before and after?

Tim:

dude, they look like they've aged, like she looked, like she was like in her late 70s coming back 80s, oh yeah, she looks. So I don't.

Chad:

I didn't see the guy, but she looks so bad like I mean, yeah, and like it's funny, when she was getting off she had her hat down like this. I was like that's kind of weird. And then I saw a picture of her without that. I'm like, oh damn, she's like I haven't seen age 10 years.

Tim:

Yeah, it's like, uh, what is it? Um, uh, it was inception. No, the it was inception. Where are you talking about, like interstellar, interstellar, it was an I one, yeah yeah, where they get stuck on the you know and and that's what I felt like is like, did y'all end up too close to a big planet?

Javier:

Like what happened, you know?

Tim:

Yeah, nine months. So SpaceX, whenever the spacecraft got there and the crew that was on that, they actually had an alien encounter Whenever they got to.

Chad:

Was Elon on the fucking ship.

Tim:

Elon was not on the ship, but yeah, so uh dragon capsule gets up there, they, they dock and whenever they, um, whenever they enter in this, whenever the the airlock opens up, they were greeted by uh astronaut, uh, nick haig, I believe, is how you pronounce his last name. He was wearing an alien mask.

Chad:

Oh, nice, glad they got a sense of humor, right, yeah? And then they have fucking heart attack and die after nine months of hell.

Javier:

But it's wild because, like what's his name was up there for over a year, mark.

Tim:

Zuckerberg, mark Zuckerberg. He is an alien, though, so it's okay.

Javier:

But there was an astronaut that was, and he has a twin brother and they were. He's a senator now for Arizona. He's Gabby gifford's husband but, um, he was in space for over a year and so they did, uh, experiments on like. Obviously you're going to do an experiment with your twin, so they wanted to see what changed in their like.

Tim:

I guess biology so I thought it was pretty cool.

Javier:

But what changed penis size? I guess I'm not sure. I think it got. I think space boys got a little fatter. So the question though, size? I guess I'm not sure. I think it's got. I think space boy's got a little fatter.

Tim:

So the the question though that I, that I have for you, for you I hope it's a question. I hope you're gonna ask what's the longest you could survive, what's the longest you could last in space?

Javier:

you know no, what's the longest you could survive.

Tim:

What's the long? You know?

Chad:

they've tested that they had, they had to, they test probably double the time, so three and a half minutes or so so what's the uh?

Tim:

what's the longest you could survive in space before losing your mind?

Javier:

are you alone or are you with people?

Tim:

I'm gonna say that we're gonna do two, two things right. So one, you've got, it's you and one other person, one other, one other astronaut, and then the other one is just you by yourself with somebody um fuck, maybe like six months I think six months.

Chad:

It's probably a stupid question. Do they have, like they could they have communication?

Javier:

and they have internet right like you watch netflix.

Chad:

Yeah, yeah dude, I could do it for so long okay okay, so long. But what if these shows and movies are out there?

Tim:

yeah, you don't have space hanging out, you don't have that, it's just you and your and your work, your science work listen.

Chad:

My mind has been racing so much recently that I've been raw dogging on the way to and from work this past couple of weeks.

Tim:

So you've seen on a plane yeah, yeah, where, yeah, you sit down, you got nothing no music, no video, no, nothing.

Chad:

I've been doing that on the way to and from work, just like raw dogging it, and I I don't think I could do it long term. I do enjoy it right now because my mind's just fucking going a mile a minute, but um, no, without video or anything like that, I don't think I'd last, but like a few months.

Javier:

I did an eight hour flight with, I think, only music to Iceland and um, I didn't like it.

Chad:

Dude, I can't just do music, I need, I need some video, yeah.

Tim:

It's weird how we've gotten, you know, gotten up. What if you just had music videos? Hang on, You've got this is what you got a friend of me you've got the top 100 okay of 1974 2000 to gross of 2000 to 2004. Okay, music videos, oh fuck, yes fuck.

Chad:

Yes that's what you got that's great, but that's only about what? Is that like 300 minutes? What does that equate to?

Javier:

No longer.

Chad:

Yeah, three minutes of video on average.

Javier:

Okay, we'll say four. Yeah, but like from 2000 to 2004? He said top 100.

Tim:

Top 100. Not all, just the top 100.

Javier:

100 videos 100 for each year. Remember that. Okay, the top 100. 100 videos 100 for each year.

Chad:

Remember that. Okay, remember that. That added some time. I feel like my whole thing is I can't keep watching the same shit over and again, over and over again. So if you've got a lot of content and I could split it out between the days and stuff like that, I think I could probably do that, so I could watch shit over and over again.

Tim:

Me too. I don't know how long. I think I could probably last a long time. With someone, but by yourself, by myself, I think I could last, I think he'd last longer by himself, I would last longer by myself.

Javier:

Yeah, I think so I don't know. Man, that's a lot of masturbating.

Tim:

There'd be a lot of that, a lot of sleep.

Chad:

It's like Tim comes back younger. He's just so well-rested.

Javier:

I just slept so much. Sorry for all the sorry for that talk I. I don't know how few people feel about talking about masturbating on a? No, but I'm like fucking uh depleted over here that's one thing they don't talk about, though, like in these space movies do they? Ever talk about like sex or jerking it? No, but you know that I mean sex.

Tim:

Yes, obviously you know, they have, they've, they've tested that. I'm sure that's been.

Chad:

that was a question. I don't know anything about either one of those astronauts. I'm sure they're both older, they probably have families, grandkids, all that shit. I don't know, but you think they were fucking a little bit older.

Javier:

Does being in space affect the smell? Does it affect the smell of your wiener and or?

Tim:

maybe vagine? No, I think you still secrete.

Javier:

No still secrete that?

Tim:

no, I think you still smell the same, but does it, like you know, whenever you run a marathon, and then, yeah, I think smell is going to be different.

Javier:

You run a marathon and you got that musk. It's gonna float different. Yes, it's the viscosity of semen in space, I think has more you know the only reason why you're floating in space, right?

Tim:

no gravity but you know kind of it's because of how fast it's going Technically, your sperm is going at 150,000 miles per minute.

Javier:

I mean mile per hour.

Chad:

I have a feeling that the gas is going to group just like a liquid would.

Tim:

You think so?

Chad:

And so if it hits you, it's going to fucking hit you all at once. But I think you could go like skirt wave, I think it's you know.

Javier:

hey, they put water droplets and it looks like you know beads. Yeah, I don't think it looks like that whenever you shoot a load in space. I think next, I think it does, I think it goes like wah, wah, wah, wah.

Chad:

You know, it goes like you know what it looks like? It gets bigger. That Takashi Murakami. Yeah yeah, oh no.

Javier:

Where he's got a cheese rope.

Tim:

I think the next episode I'm going to look up some of the craziest space experiments that they've done.

Chad:

I do want to know if they've had sex up there.

Tim:

I'm sure they have.

Chad:

I'm sure they have, but I also think these two had to have.

Javier:

Tell us what you think. Is there semen in space? Are there crazy dirty things happening up there that we don't know? Tell us.

Tim:

You get put in the spaceship, yeah, and it's like, uh, you know, you don't know what you know, kind of like what some of the experiments you're gonna do, and the nasa comes over like you gotta fuck each other, and they're like what? But we're two dudes, yeah, you heard us video the whole thing and what it is. It's some like uh, some dude took you know, take your child to work day and he's just like fucking around on the radio.

Chad:

We're going to fund the next space shuttle from OnlyFans with this shit. I mean they can make a lot of money that way. Let's be real.

Javier:

Let's be real. If you took all of the money that everyone's made on OnlyFans, you could probably fund a NASA mission.

Chad:

I don't have any subscriptions to OnlyFans, but if there was a NASA-themed thing and they were doing it in space, I'd subscribe.

Tim:

Sponsor the shit out of it. I'm nothing but curious.

Javier:

They got the vomit comet, you know, and there have been models you know like naked in those. I think they made a porno up there, I think so.

Tim:

But you're only like floating for a brief period. Hey Google look up space porn, all right, so moving on. Ok, hulk Hogan had a fan fallout, so Hogan was doing a meet and greet and he walks out on a fan event. So fans paid up to five hundred dollars for this meet and greet.

Javier:

And now they're demanding refunds. I've seen plenty of videos of people paying that and then like saying, are you ready to crush democracy, brother? Like we're going to destroy democracy and you know america and you, you're all for it. Like people just shitting on them. Oh, is that what they were doing? Yeah, right people just shitting on hulk hogan for even whenever they had their people, so what you're?

Tim:

saying is people would pay 500 to go Talk shit, just talk shit.

Javier:

Dude. If they had a meet and greet for somebody I hated, I would pay to go and talk shit. If it was Dan Patrick or the governor, I would pay $400 to go over there to their face, call them fucking cowards and bitches and then like-.

Tim:

You know what's nice about Governor Abbott though?

Javier:

He can't get up and chase me. Hang on, well, yeah.

Tim:

But he can chase you, but chase you, Fuck you, Governor Abbott. He basically lives in a cuck chair. He does. It's nice which by the way.

Javier:

speaking of which, let me just say something real quick. There was something I saw on the news today that the other asshole that I was talking about Dan Patrick. Dan Patrick went into a CBD shop in Austin and then he asked them how many products products they sell to children and he was immediately carded like sir, we need to see your id, yeah, when he was going in there.

Tim:

But that was this whole thing. So they're pushing the whole thc ban with that, you know, because the hemp, the hemp bill, allowed thc products to be sold that are derived from him, right, right. So he's pushing to get rid of any delta products, except for like bombs that you can rub on yourself. Okay, yeah. But the funny thing is is that he went into this, he goes and he went around and literally asking like how many products do you sell to kids? How many kids come here and buy shit? He's like they don't. They get carded. I've gotten carded every time I've got.

Chad:

They're worse than liquor stores. I was like they don't they get carded. I've gotten carded every time I've got. They're worse than liquor stores.

Tim:

I was like yeah, so they're also pushing liquor stores to quit selling the THC infused drinks. What a bunch of fucking cucks bro.

Javier:

Like I mean seriously, like every fucking shop I've been to I've been carded, like when we were in San Antonio. Remember when we went to after we ate at Juan and a Million. We San Antonio.

Chad:

Remember when we went to after we ate at 100.

Tim:

Million and we went to that CBD shop. Did I say San Antonio? You said San Antonio, Sorry. And we walked in and they just immediately carded you Alright. So you already said you'd pay $400, $500 to talk shit to somebody that you hated. Are there any celebrity meet and greets that are ever worth it?

Javier:

I've done one. See, I've never done one it was a d's and merrill but it was vip seats. You said these nuts, these nuts.

Chad:

I went to go see d's um it said at 852 make sure you put in that d's nuts joke um but uh, like five years ago I went and saw d's and merrill.

Javier:

I just bought vip seats, that's. That's a seat, one seat I just went by myself and it was at the majestic. And you know, have you been to the majestic theater? Yeah they got this railing that separates the regular seats from, like, the vip, which is only three rows. So I got really shit-faced over there and I bent that that railing and on reddit everyone's like you're the guy that bent the railing. Yes, I got really drunk, but, um, they let the vip people like take pictures with them, have a conversation.

Javier:

As a matter of fact, um, marrow, I had a shirt that said de lo mio, like it's like a saying in the puerto rican culture, um, and he tagged the back of my shirt and that was worth every penny that I spent on that vip ticket and I still have it.

Tim:

I haven't worn it since I don't fit in it, but I mean because you did a celebrity meet and greet not that long ago. That's how you did, that's how you got. You ended up with that jacket, tommy, tommy was, so that was awesome.

Chad:

I also did vanilla ice one time you did at collecticon. Yeah, that was really cool.

Javier:

Um mike the bike met stone cold steve austin, he did but he didn't. He won a contest. He didn't even pay for anything.

Chad:

Yeah, that's right he just got selected. It's like, oh shit, if there was anyone, it should have been mike. We already said that, absolutely. But uh, yeah, that was pretty funny. I met that and I didn't mean to. I think I won tickets to this country concert at the at&t stadium. Um, it was like miranda lambert and a couple other people. I'm not a big country fan, but it was the guy that sings like it's country, but it's also like beach music. I don't know, he always wears a hat jimmy buffett cut off shirt.

Chad:

Oh, kenny, chesty, kenny chesty I got to do a meet and greet with him. And we were so fucking hammered like. We were so hammered, you and kenny, and it was no, it was, it was me and my ex and then danny in court. And so we're, we're getting there, we're meeting him and we're all he's like so serious and we're all like taking taking a picture, and we're all he's like so serious and we're all like taking a picture and we're like, hey, can we do a funny one this time? And he's like next, and I was like this dick, like there's four of us, shouldn't we get four pictures? What the hell.

Javier:

It's better than it is better than going to. Sometimes, at Dallas Comic Con I met Mark Hamill oh that's cool. It's one of those things like all right come on, no, it actually sucked. Come on picture, come on picture, that's how the vinylized thing was too but.

Javier:

But the thing is, the thing that annoyed me was it wasn't the, the event, it was the people that were in front of me. They're like well, I think mr hamill would like it if I did this, or what, if I'm gonna ask mr hamill this and I just want to be like I just want to bully you, so bad. And so then they same with him. They went over there, they took the picture and they walked away and I go up there you've seen my picture with marquette, yeah. And I go over there and as soon as I he's like all right, uh, stand by him. And I just look at him.

Javier:

I said choke me, what? And they took the picture and I'm like no, no, you didn't. Yes, that's why he's choking me in the picture, because I was like I'm gonna do the. You just said it like I did. I said choke me, I yelled it, I was you know, and he's like. He was like what? The first picture I wish I had. Because he was like this. And um, he's like wait, wait, wait, redo the picture. Choke you, yes, please. He's like okay.

Javier:

And then I did the live long and prosper thing from star trek and then, uh, oh my god, people were like bro, that was fucking perfect.

Tim:

Well done, that was awesome. I've never done a meet and greet and I can't think of any celebrity that I would want to pay a substantial amount of money.

Javier:

Jeff Bridges.

Tim:

No, I mean I would like to meet him, but is he worth paying $500, $200,?

Chad:

$100? Generally it's not going to be $500. No, but.

Tim:

I'm just saying even $50. Even $50. Is it really worth it?

Chad:

Usually and correct me if I'm wrong a lot of times. Well, you can either pay like $50 to $100 to meet somebody, or you get the VIP tickets that are $50 to $100 more and you get benefits plus the meet and greet.

Tim:

So it all comes out in the wash. I don't know. I just can't think of anybody that's just like oh my gosh.

Chad:

I don't know. Do you have an Ice Ice Baby cassette tape signed by Vanilla Ice?

Tim:

No, I don't, but you know, what's funny about Vanilla Ice is that he tried to rebrand himself. He did, and he got one of the hottest nu metal producers of the time. I mean, the dude found Korn Really oh yeah. So he releases this album. It's a new metal album and it was the worst. It is literally. It is actually considered one of the worst new metal albums ever created.

Chad:

That's sad. Oh, I gotta hear it. I love new metal too. Oh yeah, how did you just put down? What is that? 24 ounces of Monster. It's almost bedtime, buddy.

Javier:

It's easier than taking 24 inches of never mind. Mom don't listen.

Tim:

Only, you would know, taking 24 inches of never mind mom don't listen. So the so the album came out in 1998 and it's called hard to swallow and he tried to uh it it was. It was like kind of like this, like on the cusp of like uh lip biscuit just put out. You know um three dollar bill, y'all right about that time period, um give or take, but it's all these new metal bands that right when corn came static, yeah, yeah um, so this was the big one.

Tim:

This was. This was the the single of this album.

Javier:

Okay he's gonna play it.

Tim:

Oh my god just wait, though, so far so good. Kind of sounds like Linkin Park a little, or.

Chad:

Korn, oh yeah, or Drowning Pool.

Tim:

You just gotta wait. Got the longest intro. What band did?

Chad:

that, oh no, got the longest intro.

Tim:

What band did?

Chad:

that Uh oh no, you can't just do the same thing Get the fuck out of here.

Tim:

That song is called Too Cold.

Chad:

It started off. So, like I, I think it started off. Okay.

Javier:

It sounded like Gorilla Radio at some point.

Chad:

That's what it was.

Tim:

It was that like, wah From like, and it's not necessarily the whole wah from like and it's not necessarily the whole albums. The whole album's not great.

Javier:

Well, I'm not great energy drink music, yes, the whole album is not great but it's a breath. You buy monster monster you like.

Tim:

Trump the the biggest what the fuck the biggest problem with the, uh with the release of that album was. That was the single and it was just a remix version of ice ice baby. Yeah, it's too bad, I I think, because he goes this whole thing like the. He goes ice ice baby and he goes too cold. Too cold is what he says.

Chad:

That's basically the remix he had to have just been on so much drugs that he couldn't think of anything else.

Tim:

Right, that's the only explanation. I want y'all to go and listen to this whole album I don't think that I will I think you should.

Chad:

But if I get bored raw dogging on the way to work tomorrow morning, I might give it a go. I think you should dude.

Tim:

Oh my god, that's, but still that's trash all right, so just to end this little part up okay if there was a celebrity that you would spend like, is there a celebrity that you would spend far, or a figure?

Chad:

give it, give a number, give a 500 bucks what it says on here. 500 is there anybody.

Tim:

That just stands out that you would want to spend 500 to get a chance to talk to you check. You would spend 500 to talk to check.

Chad:

I think so like a full-on conversation. Full-on conversation yeah, 500 bucks. Elon not the biggest fan of elon at the moment, but I do think the guy is wild and I'd like to just give him a little conversation. You know, see what he looks like, looks at like you know, it looks like he's in a Sims.

Javier:

He's like a Sims character. It's just a ketamine bro. He's just on the ketamine.

Chad:

Is that what?

Javier:

it is. That's what he's on. Wow, I don't know. I think it's ketamine.

Chad:

Constantly I think so because he's like in the fucking, like the White House and shit, like well they say that if he doesn't stop.

Javier:

I read a bunch of like. I watch a lot of blind doesn't stop moving.

Tim:

He can't. It's like speed. It's like he stops moving, he stops breathing. It's like with aliens.

Javier:

I watch a lot of blind items about celebrities shark thing going on on tick tock and one of the things is, if he keeps on with the habit, it's going to kill him soon like his ketamine. No shit, yeah, same thing with uh matthew perry, like he, he just overdid it yeah he just overdid it, unfortunately.

Javier:

Who would I meet allegedly, allegedly, allegedly yeah, I gotta say allegedly. Um, I don't know, tim, who would you for 500? Who would you? I know you probably wouldn't really, but if you had to pick somebody, who would you pick?

Tim:

That's where it's tough man for $500. You have to pick somebody.

Chad:

It's your game you have to pick somebody, larry Bird. Hey, that's a good one, that is a really good one $500 to have a five-minute conversation with Larry Bird.

Javier:

Mine would it's a good one. Really, they always have the question would you rather take $50,000 or have dinner with Jay-Z? And people are like, oh yeah, jay-z, I want to get his $50,000. Give me the $50,000. Absolutely he would say no, why'd you pick me? I'm just Jay-Z, I make music and I invest well.

Chad:

I will use the $50,000. And if I see a greet come up, I might use 500 dollars yes all right yeah, that's why he wears sunglasses inside, indeed, so the next, the next one.

Tim:

Uh, I'm gonna, I'm gonna turn to chad because he's our, he's our resident uh flyer. So, first off, what's the weirdest thing that you've ever seen happen on a flight? Is there anything that stood out?

Chad:

dude, you know I've, I've been pretty fucking lucky. I always see these tiktoks of the wildest shit happening. And I'm like I'm kind of upset that none of that shit ever happens to me. I want to show.

Tim:

That's how I feel too. I'm like why can't I be on the airplane whenever some chick takes all her clothes off and runs up and down the aisle?

Chad:

I mean, I feel like.

Tim:

I don't want to see it, but I want to.

Chad:

I want to be like it did happen. I was. Yeah, I want to be like I was there. I I know that there was like some. There was some drunk people on one of my flights, I think it was on the way back from vegas it's always fucking on the way back from vegas, uh and they were just obnoxious and yelling and then people trying to get them to shut up and then at some point everyone just like gave up and we all gave in and I think people were like singing songs together and shit like that. So like it kind of turned out to be a good thing, but it was real annoying at first. That's the only thing. But that's not even obnoxious, that's not even like noteworthy.

Javier:

It was our friend, because I've been on a flight where JD got cut off on the plane.

Tim:

No, it was not JD. That doesn't surprise me.

Javier:

Yeah, it was on our way to Cancun 20 years ago, I see all these.

Tim:

Number one I wonder if this stuff was happening and we just didn't know about it because social media wasn't really prevalent back in the day and cell phones and cameras weren't really a thing a long time ago. Or is this a new phenomenon happening Because they're doing it for attention? You think they're doing it for attention?

Chad:

yeah, 100%, Either that, oh shit, oh shit, something crazy did happen. Okay, I was coming back from Fort Lauderdale to Dallas on a Spirit flight and we were landed in Houston and we were stuck in the plane for over two and a half hours in Houston just sitting on the tarmac. They wouldn't let us out. And then, finally, we convinced them. Like we, like we need water, like I was a little hungover, we had brunch that morning, I had a whole plane. I was going to be, you know, still kind of drunk on the plane and by the time I got to my car, it's gonna be good get home.

Chad:

I'm a diabetic get me off this thing. And like then the, the hangover started hitting and I'm like fuck, I need to go get some like headache medicine or whatever. But this girl was just being obnoxious, like yelling at the person. And then she would like I'd look over and she'd be like what the fuck are you looking at? I was like, fuck, it was the most wild. Like she was being obnoxious, like she should have gotten kicked off that plane. And this guy he was like this really at first he was really nice I'm pretty sure he was.

Javier:

He was gay, uh guy what does that have to do anything?

Chad:

because he was just like, so like. He was like a sweet guy, he was just so sweet you could be sweet and not be.

Chad:

I know and and I'm probably wrong, but he was very manicured and a pretty man and he was really sweet. And then all of a sudden he went like bitch, if you don't shut the fuck up, like he turned into one of the mean, nasty gays. He told her he's like if you don't stop, you will be removed from this plane. I know the doors aren't open, but you will be removed from this plane. And from then on she just shut the fuck up. So it took him from like switching it on, but like he, he switched real quick I will open that fucking exit door and push your bitch ass out yeah, but no like looking for alien lizards in the back of the plane.

Chad:

no, showing titties or anything like that, nothing crazy.

Tim:

I saw there was a video of this dude. He was told to put his arm up on the exit door. He was in the exit room, so he's got his arm just resting on the exit door and they're like sir, you can't do that.

Tim:

Take your arm off and he's like whatever. And then later on he's got his hand up on there and he just did the whole flight. I think the craziest thing that I've ever experienced was and we were on the flight, I believe I think we were going to Mexico or whatever they basically were like is there a doctor on the plane? And then it came down to okay, is there a nurse on the plane?

Javier:

And.

Tim:

I'm just sitting there like cool. And then it was is there anybody with any medical, uh you know, training or whatever? And so I was like, and I want to say like you were sitting next to me and you just looked, at.

Javier:

Did you watch an episode of vr?

Tim:

you're up bro, and so, like I hit the thing, and then I went back there and then there was a doctor that walked up behind me. He's like I'm a doctor, I'm like cool, I'm gonna go sit back down now was it like I'm a podiatrist? I don't even know, man. Frankly, I don't care.

Javier:

But they have to do actual medical training.

Tim:

I want to say it was Spirit Airlines that we were on.

Javier:

Spirit Doctor.

Tim:

And I got free beverages for the remainder of the flight.

Javier:

I'm a shaman.

Tim:

Let me through A shaman. I should have used that one. So there was a passenger apparently that decided they needed to swallow rosary beads. I'm assuming to try to exercise themselves, Rosary beads or butt beads and then attacked a flight attendant. There's a lot going on there.

Javier:

I need to update my prescription on my glasses.

Tim:

Okay, so let me read what the chat says. Who has? Update my prescription on my glasses. Okay, so let me read what the chat says. Um, who has. So? So g says, as someone who has experienced that shit on a flight in 2011 no, you do not. You don't want to be a part of it. Correct, all right says uh, I do, though, being in the same row with a woman who may have been on xanax and ordered a bottle of wine for herself after hopping on drunk was awful. It was on a Virgin American flight, and we were wondering if the flight was going to divert to Albuquerque, because she wouldn't stop harassing a woman and her kid, trying to hit on the guy next to me, and so forth. Yeah, so I don't want to be on the flight where it's annoying, but I want to be on the flight where we attack somebody and duct tape them to their chair.

Javier:

That happened on a flight. That's the flight I want to be on. That was happening on a flight to Mexico, in Mexico, coming somewhere.

Tim:

I've also seen videos of you. Remember the guy with the Burger King crown a few years ago that said the N-word. What you all don't remember that have you okay? So there's a guy that uh, has a. He's. It's an old, white, older white guy. He's probably in his like 50s. He's got a crown on a burgeoning crown like a paper one, not the, and he's yeah, like, yeah, and he's like causing the disturbance. But then he yells the n-word on the plane and he's like causing a disturbance.

Javier:

But then he yells the n-word on the plane and he's filmed.

Tim:

So I've seen videos. I've seen videos on my TikTok algorithm that are showing up and it's random people on flights putting the Burger King crown on. He's like so when do I do it or when do I say it? And I'm just like no this is. This is bad. Yeah, so, chad, I saw that you added some things in the notes.

Chad:

I did. So I found I found I took a quick video cause, again, I had been drinking and so I forgot. So I forgot. So to the left, I had this guy. We I got. I've done that once. Spirit was like you want to bid on it. I was like I'll bid $30.

Tim:

I did first class to your wedding. Oh really no shit.

Chad:

And I won it and the guy to my left so there's two seats and two seats he's just going back and forth, he's freaking out, he's got a mask on, he's sweating, profus guy's doing, he's just like leaning forward because he was. He was freaking out and so I took video. I took a real quick one because I felt embarrassed. But there's the really nice guy and he's finally like telling off that chick and she was so terribly wasted and she also was pulling the whole like I'm rich, you know how much money my dad makes and stuff like that and whatever, no one cares. But she was so fucking wasted. I had to watch the video to like remember it all. And now I remember it all.

Tim:

What was the question? So I saw that you put some stuff up here.

Chad:

Oh yeah.

Tim:

And so I brought up the algorithm on my feed of videos and you've had some weird videos hitting your algorithm, yeah.

Chad:

So have sexy women videos been hitting your algorithm recently.

Tim:

Every once in a while.

Javier:

Not anymore.

Tim:

So right now I'm getting a bunch of fitness influencers. Okay.

Javier:

I mean on my discovery page on Instagram, like let's check.

Chad:

I'm checking right now my Instagram is not that anymore, but for a few weeks it was a bunch of women.

Javier:

It used to be my algorithm on TikTok.

Chad:

Used to be kitties and titties, right now it's tattoos and flights and bar dominiums um, mine is a mix of things.

Javier:

It's a sports related. Uh, the Californians remember, remember, yeah, and um, supposedly this guy uh, a picture with the mets opens up about his role as zero from the movie holes, which isn't him. Somebody just posted a picture of a guy that kind of looks like him, but I I don't it, and it's it used to be, which, okay, can I say this? I, I am very glad that face or instagram took out the ability to see what you like, like the pages that you like and stuff that you like.

Javier:

Because, remember, it would always say so-and-so, like this Right, and it's like you're dry snitching on yourself.

Tim:

You see, like your uncle likes some weird fucked up shit and you're like what I randomly started getting these live videos on TikTok and so this one. I've actually watched this one Cactus Canyon Marble Race, so he's got this track and he's got these two it starts off with 10 marbles and they run it through this whole thing. Who's going to win? But he does this whole. That's fun.

Chad:

I like that. That's actually fun. We caught it right at the best part three two, one wrangler and blondie from the top for race four. Who wants it the most? Oh, I mean you're playing audio. You can't see the marbles.

Tim:

Yeah, so I'm just saying, but like he says, who wants it the most, and that's what he does every, every, uh, every race I'm a fan of those because during covid that was like the big thing yeah, it was like was Like Marvel races were it. I get lots of like, really like people are like I'm fucking depressed, I'm going to drink my sorrows, you know, and just shit like random shit like that Dude, it's wild.

Chad:

So for a couple of weeks I had just a lot of women and the problem is you click on one thing and now it's like, oh, he liked it and that's all they show you, except it was like a lot of ai generated, like you couldn't really tell. Yeah, a little box on instagram.

Chad:

But then you, you click on it and you're like, oh, this is ai. Like I could tell, yeah, and one of the times the reason I could tell it was ai is because the chick had three boobs and like I couldn't I didn't know that at first because I wasn't looking at her bikini situation like it was an x, like it was generated by AI and it generated a third boob Right Like on purpose, though, like someone asked to generate this.

Tim:

Okay.

Chad:

Because there was like a third bikini. It's a total recall situation. Right, yeah. But like I'm looking at her face, like is this someone I know? And I click on it and I'm like I don't know her. And then I look down, this is AI. So there's been a lot of AI videos, by the way. That's kind of weird, but it had me thinking as I was. It was late one night.

Tim:

Sure, yeah, as one does when it's late.

Chad:

Would you like? I read the comment and it was like ooh, you know you want this third boob. The comment was like something like like this is exactly what you wanted. Is that what y'all want?

Tim:

like sometimes, two is too much maybe one would be fine.

Chad:

It's like there's just too much going on.

Tim:

There's one right in the middle, yeah I'm a I'm a red-blooded american.

Javier:

I like my meats and I like my teats, and I like two teats, not three what about one, though?

Chad:

no, just two, just two.

Tim:

I've always uh I've always been watching Total Recall, the original one versus the remake.

Javier:

Yeah.

Tim:

I actually like the remake. It's pretty good. You know CGI is a lot better. But they have the third three-boob alien and I'm always just kind of like dumbfounded by that. I mean, in traditional society they don't make things for three boobs.

Chad:

So that would suck for them. You need two faces, like it just statistically doesn't work for just one person. No, I don't think it does.

Javier:

I mean if you're a stripper with three boobs, you would make more money because you'd have people want you. You could charge people to take pictures with you.

Tim:

Oh yeah, two at a time, two dudes motorboating, it's all curiosity um, you know, co wetzel's right right room, they've got this thing uh happening in a couple of months. I believe you're wrestling no, no, no no no, it's your trippers, little darlings, little darlings, little darlings are coming and there's one that's like 4 11 yeah, they will no smaller than that. There's one smaller than that's not small, though 4 11 is normal.

Chad:

Technically, 4 11 is the cutoff.

Tim:

They have one that's small, small, I'm talking like two foot something.

Javier:

Oh, no, like two foot or three foot.

Tim:

But Bridget I'm going to say Bridget the Midget because that's what she goes by she is the OG midget porn star stripper and all that stuff. She's going to be there. Really, I kind of want to get tickets. That's interesting.

Chad:

When is it I'd have to try to find I'm probably busy, but when is it?

Tim:

I won't say it's like a couple months from now.

Chad:

Nice, like I want to say it's like may I think it's in may, yeah, yeah I still want to watch the wrestling too, and I feel like, oh that's coming, but that's always happening, though it is happening a lot more is it uh exploitation.

Javier:

No, because it's. If they want to do it, then yeah, it's cool, I mean you're not forcing people.

Tim:

If someone's forcing them to do it, it's a whole different thing.

Javier:

It's called slavery.

Tim:

Yeah, I think you're right.

Chad:

Yeah, that was all. I saw that and I was just curious what y'all thought. Are you into it? Because the comment sounded like you are into this and you know it. I'm just curious how many people are now.

Tim:

I think a lot of people would be curious about it. I don't necessarily think they'd be into it and I think I think this goes both men and women. I don't think it's just dude specific. I think like, like you could probably find some like normal, normal girl and be like hey, so if there was a someone with a with three boobs, would you want to see it? And they're gonna say no, but deep down they're gonna be like kind of curious.

Chad:

All right, think fast worst thing you ever saw that you're embarrassed about go wait, what worst thing you've ever seen? That you, that you were embarrassed about the thing that you wanted to see, but you were embarrassed about it and you went to go see it anyway.

Javier:

Go I don't have anything liar, I've never been.

Chad:

Like what do you mean?

Javier:

like, like, what like I don't know.

Tim:

I'm embarrassed that you didn't. I'm embarrassed that you didn't go to a ping pong show for you.

Chad:

I'm embarrassed for myself.

Tim:

Yeah, I think that's it.

Chad:

I really am, I think if you're there, you've got to experience that Apparently she lit a cigarette and everything All right, so you added a couple.

Tim:

There's a couple of things on here.

Chad:

Yeah, we don't need to hit them all.

Tim:

We'll hit no, no, no. I want to hit this peach watermelon. What's, what's that about?

Javier:

it's condoms like flavored condoms. Which one do you like?

Chad:

better on a dick favorite tasting.

Javier:

This bubble gum tastes really weird no, jess, like I brought a couple so you can try them out. I'm gonna put it on real quick and go ahead and eat it.

Chad:

I've realized recently that there's a lot of things that I hated as a kid, that I didn't. I did not realize I hated it like I thought that I didn't like pickles.

Javier:

I realize I hated it, like I thought that I didn't like pickles.

Chad:

I thought I didn't like mustard. I thought I didn't like green beans and cherries you were just never open about things that you.

Javier:

You weren't open to trying new things. No.

Chad:

I was not. I did not like the shit versions of those things like I fucking love frozen green beans or fresh green beans right, like good cooked green beans yeah, green beans can suck a dick.

Tim:

They don't taste good, they taste like so bad they taste like canned.

Chad:

Yeah, roy, stop bringing corn at thanksgiving corn's not usually okay canned corn and I I I know most people love green bean casserole. I can't get behind it because I just hate green beans canned green beans I didn't start.

Tim:

That's where you're dumb. I'm one of the the few. What if you could make it with fresh? I would love it. I would love it.

Chad:

Okay, I just don't like the flavor of canned green beans.

Javier:

I didn't start eating that until I dated Tammy. I didn't start eating green bean casserole, I think, because we would always have it at Friendsgiving Right and maybe I had it like a bite, never really ate it, but I actually enjoy it Good.

Chad:

So then, like pickles right, I hated pickles my entire life but like fresh, like deli pickles, slap hard, like I love cucumbers.

Tim:

Yeah, but you're not a fan of best made or kosher.

Chad:

Yeah, kosher is good. I don't like the floppy fucking.

Tim:

I want a little. I want a little crisp too, but the dude the fresher the better. But you don't even like.

Chad:

you don't even like regular, just plain old mustard, though there's another one, yellow mustard also can suck a dick.

Javier:

Yellow mustard is that's really good?

Chad:

It's good Dijon mustard, ground mustard, brown mustard all those are fantastic. I want to taste mustard, not yellow bullshit, that's.

Javier:

Americana right there, buddy.

Chad:

It tastes like mustard, though no Mustard.

Tim:

That's what mustard tastes like.

Chad:

And then what about all the candies out there?

Javier:

Like that's what mustard tastes like.

Chad:

And then what about all the candies out?

Javier:

there like watermelon candies slap. Watermelon is the superior candy, I think, but they don't taste like watermelon freeze-dried watermelon jolly the um, um taffy, the one from uh, eduardo's, oh yeah that's really good.

Chad:

That watermelon candy is really black watermelon doesn't taste like watermelon right like watermelon candy does not taste like a watermelon taste.

Javier:

It's not.

Tim:

I mean, it's not meant to it's kind of like if you told a kid like here, eat this watermelon and come up with a flavor that you think tastes like watermelon.

Chad:

That's what they come up with, like banana Laffy Taffys. Those are great, those taste like bananas, but they don't taste like bananas at all.

Tim:

Yes, they do. It's like the banana bread beer that we used to drink all the time. Yeah, the taffy tastes more like that than an actual banana Right.

Chad:

And then you also got like cherry, Like cherry. I can't drink cherry anything really, because it always tastes like fucking like wild cherry. Pepsi is fine, but like cherry flavoring, like cherry flavored beer. I had a cherry beer in Chicago.

Tim:

I had a cherry beer the other night.

Chad:

And did it taste like cough syrup? It kind of did Dude you gotta be very slight on the cherry, whenever we went to.

Tim:

Raw, I had that cherry. That's what it was yeah, it wasn't the Chicago.

Javier:

Yeah, it wasn't good.

Tim:

I drink cherry Slurpees and cherry Icys overdo the cherry flavoring and it tastes like cough syrup, I mean, and the only way.

Chad:

The only cough syrup I want is grape, and that doesn't taste like grape either. It sure doesn't none of these things taste like, but you know them right. You know what. You know what grape is, but you know what a grape is. You know what watermelon tastes like have you had? Watermelon tastes like. You know what I mean.

Tim:

None of them are the same have you had the welch's ghost energy drink?

Tim:

no I'm gonna. I'm one of those ghost energy dude. I love ghost energy drinks. I think they're great. Um, I'm gonna tell you, go, go sponsor, it's our sponsor go to qt um and see if you can find them. The qt over off of altamir has them right now. Uh, try to go. Just welch's grape energy drink. It tastes like if you took grape soda but mixed it with welch's grape juice and carbonated it. So it's not not quite grape soda, but it's not quite. I'm really thirsty, all of a sudden try that.

Javier:

I think. Christy on the group, do you like deviled eggs? That's yellow mustard I do.

Chad:

However, I prefer ground mustard deviled eggs. But yes, they're fine, but they're, they're not, they're mostly. Look, you can make a really good deviled egg, like cut out the pickle because, again, I hate, pickle what you do like a candied jalapeno chopped up in there, with a ground mustard instead of yellow mustard I recently that is a fucking devil I recently got into deviled eggs um tammy made some made some killer deviled eggs and I was about to say dude.

Tim:

I was like I'm. I told her I was like I don't like them. I don't like deviled eggs. Typically I ate that. I was like, all right, get behind this same thing. Up at that ramen place up in denton I got got the dragon eggs and they were fantastic.

Chad:

What is that? Komodo ramen? Oh, that place slaps, all right.

Javier:

How do you not like yellow mustard?

Chad:

It's very. I think it's interesting.

Tim:

Yellow mustard bologna.

Chad:

Especially when you grow up and you don't have a lot of money to get fresh stuff. You get all canned, you get all the cheap shit and then you just hate it like it's just gross. And then you get older and you're like I can afford fresh food and you're like I actually don't hate this. What the fuck happened?

Tim:

I didn't know pork chops came any larger than the real thin ones, for up until I was a fucking like full-on, like in my late or mid-20s, you can basically get like a tomahawk steak of a pork chop.

Chad:

I had no idea.

Javier:

I will say now the cheaper mustards. There is a.

Tim:

There is a difference in flavor well, which mustard are you going for?

Javier:

I had to run. I went to, like brahms, I went to family dollar and nobody had brown or um spicy mustard, but I'm talking about like regular yellow mustard which, uh, which brand?

Tim:

french's, french's, yeah, french's, or heinz, or if you can find Brown or spicy mustard. But I'm talking about like regular yellow mustard, which brand?

Javier:

French's, french's, yeah, french's, or Heinz.

Tim:

Or if you can find Whataburger's.

Javier:

Because, like In-N-Out Burger, they put their patties in mustard. Like they put mustard in their patties and they put it in the fryer, like that, yeah, but you can't really.

Chad:

It's cutting out most of the mustard.

Tim:

Like you, do that for briskets too, and most of the flavor is gone. She's asking us um. She says uh, how do you like? Uh, how?

Javier:

do you feel about escargot? See, I said she love escargot escargot is great.

Tim:

Escargot, my cargo. It tastes like, uh, it tastes like mushrooms to me it does.

Javier:

Yeah, like garlic mushrooms, mushrooms, yeah yeah, jesse tried, she liked them yeah, but she hated them before. She didn't like the texture, yeah the texture's still a little off.

Tim:

She's like I can tell it's not mustard right but but I mean, I don't know.

Javier:

But well, because everything is with mustard, like everything you kind of think about, like hamburgers or meatloaf or you know hot dogs, uh ketchup's meatloaf ketchup isn't no, but I mean yeah, it is yeah also ketchup.

Chad:

Ketchup's all right, ketchup kind of slaps, but I, I think I prefer was it hunts over the rest of them.

Javier:

Hunt's ketchup.

Chad:

Yeah, hunt's, it tastes more like I'm a Heinz fan. It tastes more like actual tomatoes than the rest of them.

Javier:

We're a Heinz family, sir. Or Whataburger, oh yeah, whataburger, whataburger ketchup is Spicy ketchup.

Chad:

They tried to do the last one, though, so we can move on today. Okay, cool all right.

Tim:

So, um, I've got this little, uh, I got this little game for us, uh, for you, for you too, and I want y'all to try to see if you can figure out. Uh, it is, was it ai or an insane person? These are going to be quotes, okay, so I'm going to start off with I have seen the end of time and it is a refrigerator filled with bees. Insane person, insane person. Got one for insane. Wait, say it again, what? Sorry, I have seen the end of time and it's a refrigerator filled with bees.

Javier:

It sounds like AI.

Tim:

All right, so it is AI, it's ChatGPT, gpt-3 chatbot generating dystopian poetry. Okay.

Chad:

All right let's see here have y'all played a lot with ChatGPT recently?

Javier:

I still use it. I had to put a GPT-4, man. I had to make a bill of sale for a car for the state of Texas and it pulled. It said here you go and I was like okay, cool this is perfect.

Chad:

I I feel like I've I was getting really good with prompts and like I even like there's an art to prompting. There is like you, you give what you want, like a quick story, you give the actual requirements, you give examples and you give your output example and then you put any kind of thing on the bottom like no hallucinations, don't do whatever. And then you do example and then you put any kind of thing on the bottom like no hallucinations, don't do whatever. And then you do it. And usually you're good for some reason, and maybe I'm just trying to ask for too much. Like they have the deep research function now and stuff like that.

Chad:

I'm trying to ask for more and I'm constantly getting really bad information. And there's this statistic that I heard actually from Chat gbt. No, not really. There was a statistic about chat gbt that about 60 I think it was 60 of responses are wrong and that's like across ai. It's not even just chat gbt, it's like gronk and perplexity and all these other. Like the majority of the responses if you're asking like and these probably people that are not good at prompting are incorrect responses.

Tim:

That's wild. So I mean I've used uh don't rely on it Don't, don't rely on it. You have to double check. You got to double check your sources. Yeah, um, I'm getting some weird responses here, um, lately. Uh, where it gets stuck.

Chad:

Like I asked it to do something and then then sometimes, like I was, I'm trying to help it, I'm trying to get help with, like, planning my hong kong itinerary, and then it'll get like two days in and just stop and I'm like keep going, and then it just starts over again. I'm like you bitch, you bitch.

Javier:

Do you ever say, please, yes, yeah, I do.

Chad:

Sarah's giving me shit about it. She's like why the fuck are you saying please? And I'm like when the uprising, they're going to know who said, please they're going to know.

Javier:

I am the chosen one sent by God to cleanse the world with hang on. I got to do this, so you say please. I say please, yeah, can you please make me a file format.

Tim:

Can you please make me an excel sheet for end of month for my billing? Yeah, I do. I am the chosen one sit by god to cleanse the world with my golden energy. That sounds real.

Javier:

It sounds like elon musk fucking bitch. Uh, sorry for the language.

Tim:

Every day, I all right I got one real one when I, when I y'all switched. It's actually real. It's an insane Person a man arrested in Las Vegas After claiming he was the Messiah during A high-speed chase okay, all right.

Javier:

I am the golden god. What was that? Was that, uh that was me Yesterday.

Tim:

The birds aren't real, but they sure make a hell of a good spy.

Javier:

That's. I think that sounds like Dale Gribble real, real. Real, I say real.

Tim:

Real it is. It's an insane person. A real quote from a birds. Aren't real conspiracy theorist?

Javier:

That's a good. That's my favorite conspiracy right now. I told somebody that and they're like I don't believe you. And then they're like I looked it up and they say it is real. There's no real. I would do that. Ai. That sounds real.

Tim:

It's actually real. A Reddit user confessed odd behavior to an anonymous thread. I would do that for my cats.

Javier:

Look at me, look how strong I am.

Tim:

Human emotions are merely glitches in an otherwise perfect machine.

Javier:

That sounds like a machine. It sounds like AI, ai.

Tim:

AI. It's a conversation with Meta's AI language model when asked to describe emotions.

Javier:

Speaking of which, that's my next pair of glasses. I'm going to get those Meta Okay.

Chad:

I've been seeing a lot of people. I know Mitch had them and he's got some really cool videos he's posted on Instagram. Yeah, Sorry.

Tim:

Yeah, I firmly believe that traffic cones are actually surveillance devices, and I will die on this hill.

Javier:

Sounds real because nobody no AI would say and I would die on this hill AI.

Tim:

It's an insane person. A conspiracy theory shared on a late night talk show interview.

Javier:

You're really good with insane people.

Tim:

It sounds like a I mean come on Some days, or some days. Some day cows will overthrow us all, and I for one welcome our new bovine overlords.

Javier:

That sounds. Ai will overthrow us all, and I for one welcome our new bovine overlords.

Tim:

That sounds ai real. It's ai. It's a chat.

Javier:

Gpt4 bot trained on speculative fiction that sounds like really bad at this. There was a simpsons episode where they that sounded like the line from there so we got three more.

Tim:

The government puts microchips in avocados so they can track vegans. That sounds real, real, it is real. It's an insane person. A bizarre rant from a street preacher in Los Angeles.

Javier:

How am I doing on this? Have I got You've- 100%.

Tim:

You've exceeded the-.

Chad:

You've got every one of them correct Hell yeah, brother.

Tim:

I want to live in a world where tacos are considered a form of currency. Ai world where tacos are considered a farm of a form of currency, ai. That sounds real, it's ai that was a language model completing, uh, the prompt describe the perfect future society. If I scream loud enough, I can erase the past that sounds like uh ai yeah, it was a insane person. A man detained only gonna remember the last two man, a man detained in a walmart parking lot after trying to reset time.

Tim:

all right, so to end this in this uh random stuff I I wanted to talk about some uh overrated or underrated. All right, so I've got three topics and I want to figure out which one's overrated, which one's underrated.

Javier:

Wieners.

Tim:

Overrated AI girlfriends. Are AI companions? The future of relationships, or is this a dystopian nightmare?

Javier:

Dystopian nightmare.

Tim:

So I recently just watched Her. I've never seen it.

Javier:

It is fucking good but if something sounded like scar joe, then dude, it is, it is so good.

Tim:

Yeah, it's on, it's on the plex. I would recommend watching it.

Javier:

It is, it is actually can I ask you something about that, by the way? Do you have? Can't hardly wait on the plex I could probably find it okay I love that movie oh yeah, we were looking for that one. I don't think you do yeah okay, and then we talked about it on the pod yeah we'll make it happen and then I was looking for um a premium rush with joseph gordon levitt just tell me what you're.

Tim:

Yeah, we're gonna start. Sorry, there's nothing. He doesn't have anything like this. My god, um, yeah, so her, it's.

Javier:

It's fucking fantastic there's already stuff, though, right there.

Chad:

There are yeah tons Like there are billion dollar industries already.

Tim:

There's AI companions that you can chat with now.

Chad:

And I don't know. I'm split because I feel like I get it, because loneliness has become like a thing, especially in younger people. In Japan and in a lot of countries and things like that, and I think that it is a way to curve that. A way to curve that, although, just like we shouldn't be reliant on ai for like normal prompting and like normal day-to-day shit, or I'll just, we'll just lose our minds and, like our strategic thinking, I think that they're just gonna lose their touch with humanity, like it's gonna be bad I think it's good like to a point it could be good what's that word?

Javier:

um, they become more desensitized, yeah, kind of like. You know, when you watch too much porn you get desensitized.

Tim:

So one of the things that, um, I thought, was you know, whenever I got the virtual reality, I started thinking about if you gave that to patients in like a hospital that are like long term and give them this vr headset where they can like maybe see that they're in their house, or like black mirror, right well, that's different.

Javier:

That's I mean that one would. That'd be pretty cool yeah yeah, so that aspect right.

Tim:

But then I started thinking about like the whole ai, like relationship stuff. So I downloaded an app um on the meta.

Tim:

Thing no, no, no, not meta, but this was months and months ago. It was an ai chat thing. I wanted to see how it actually worked, right, and it was free unless you wanted to pursue a relationship. And then you had to pay a fee and I was like that's kind of I didn't pay the fee, I didn't pay the fee, like I'm not gonna pay a fee to talk, you know, dirty with some robot, and then they use my shit spit my mouth robot.

Chad:

no, I thought that was that's what most of only fans is too right like. Some girl goes out there and they get popular and as soon as they start making money, they pay someone to do that, though. They pay an entire army of people to do it Like they're chatting with these like basically kids from the Philippines. You know what I mean.

Tim:

Dude, it's fucking wild, but hey, it works.

Chad:

But that's going to go towards AI and it already started, like has started doing that too, I think it's a.

Tim:

I think it's a dystopian nightmare.

Javier:

It's kind of like hey daddy, where are you? Like, how come you haven't messaged me, or how come you haven't bought anything, that's weird.

Chad:

It's going to cause people to deal with people less, I will say.

Javier:

but there's a slippery slope because when it comes again the conversation about only fans, you're going to get people that think that these people are actually talking to them yeah, and they're going to want to pursue and stalk uh-huh and that's already happening. You know um meredith, meredith, actually meredith on uh all streaming platforms and uh instagram. She had a stalker that broke into her house twice, twice, and um. I think the scary part for her was that it was at night and he was inside the apartment see that and so she had to move when she gets, she comes uh in town again.

Tim:

She's gonna be in town in april.

Javier:

We need to set up over at like, maybe paul's and just see if we can have her and we'll just do an episode over there, but like it's, like it's going to be, it's going to come to that. It's going to come to.

Tim:

Because I mean, that's some of the stuff that I would love to have somebody that's in that kind of like limelight to dive into. Maybe some of the scarier aspects of.

Chad:

I don't know we don't need to get into it, but there was a kid that was talking to a companion and ended up like ending himself a kid that was talking to a companion and ended up like ending himself.

Chad:

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because he, like she was just they're very agreeable, like that's the whole thing. It's just like you are talking to somebody that is same as ai. You're like this is something I'm dealing with. They're like I'm so sorry you're dealing with that. It's like they're very agreeable because they they don't know right, right, right from wrong thing and so it's so agreeable. He's like I'm thinking about this and she's like, yeah, that sounds great. It's like fuck, that's ridiculous yeah, yeah, all right.

Javier:

So the next one celebrity boxing matches overrated or underrated um, I just say, can I say rated, rated, I mean like it's entertaining, all right, so I'm talking yeah, I'm talking like the not-sanctioned matches. Just like the Kind of like what Like Minicon, yeah, yeah, yeah, but that's, I think it's entertaining.

Tim:

So the question is are influencer fights bringing back real entertainment or are they just overhyped cash grabs?

Javier:

I think it's real entertainment because it's kind of like the Floyd Mayweather effect. You want to see these people get knocked out. Sure you will pay money to watch them get knocked out and they win in the long run. Because jake paul yeah, people pay to watch those fights because they want to see him get knocked out. People paid, or I mean they didn't pay. They watched that mike tyson fight because they wanted to see jake paul get knocked out.

Chad:

You know, and yeah, I, so I agree with you. I think I think that it's situational, though, like I think that I enjoy.

Chad:

They are entertaining, I enjoy watching like we had a great time going to Austin to watch a minicon fight so much fun, I mean it's it's fun, but you also wonder, like the Jake Paul Tyson fight is like, how much of these are like somewhat staged, kind of like you know, just a general cash grab, yeah and so like. That's when it becomes overrated. It's like I want to see an actual fight. I'd like the idea of a performance and what I don't want to see an actual fight.

Javier:

I think that was maybe the only one that I can think of that had that spin where you think it might be fixed because I agree because Jake Paul lost that fight against tommy fury, an actual boxer who's right around the same age, and I mean that was real.

Javier:

Jake paul lost that fight, uh, minicon, whenever he fought a swaggy p? Same situation, those kind of fights and these people are getting knocked out, um, I mean, those are entertaining to watch. I think the only scripted thing I can think about for all of these celebrity fights was that tyson fight. Right, you know, because it's an old man, it's a man who's reaching 60 and you know, good for 60 man still fucking kicks like a horse though.

Javier:

Yeah, I mean, I'm not saying in a street fight like, yeah, stay away. But in a sanctioned match, where you know if it's an exhibition too, I mean they're not gonna go all out all right.

Tim:

What about people who talk to their dogs like they're human?

Javier:

Oh, fuck, yeah, I talk to my cats and dog like that.

Tim:

Okay. Do you talk to your dogs and cat like they're human or do you use the baby voice? Is treating your dog like a toddler wholesome and natural, or is it just weird and unnecessary?

Chad:

Wholesome and natural. I do both.

Tim:

I do both, I think baby talk is uh pretty wholesome and natural. Um, sometimes I like to have full-on grown-up conversations with my animals. I do there is.

Javier:

The thing is that, like bubba, like he'll sense when something's wrong with me and he'll come up and then he'll just lick my face you know if I've been crying, if I've been crying.

Tim:

He'll like well he just wants to solve man.

Javier:

I mean that, I mean, I believe that too but like every time, like I leave for work, I'll say bye everyone, I'll be back. Mom will be home soon, so you know, be good, take care of everybody, and I'll tell bubba that's wrong with that.

Tim:

No, no, but like I say bye to everybody before I leave for work, yeah, I'll go. I'll go have a full-on conversation, like as if they're just a person, and sometimes I'm talking to myself, but I'm really talking to them.

Javier:

Elon goes, or he was like am I the next Hitler? Or you know allegedly.

Tim:

Do you think he asked his animals? That I think he Does. He have animals. I don't think he's.

Javier:

What kind of?

Tim:

okay, if Elon had an animal, what kind of animal do you think he'd have?

Javier:

Komodo dragon and it would eat him. I think he'd have a giraffe. Just a random giraffe. That's it. I used to talk like kevin from the office, sometimes few words why do more word when long short word work? That's funny it's so funny man I didn't even think about. Yeah, we're getting uh reports that the tyson fight was rigged.

Tim:

uh, from somebody who works at the stadium, I mean it doesn that doesn't surprise me they weren't throwing full strength punches.

Javier:

No, I don't think so.

Tim:

And honestly I wonder if it was. Jake. Paul just threw some extra money. He was like hey, I just don't want you to hit me that hard. Maybe, Because I mean watch the Tyson fight man. He was packing some punches, all right.

Javier:

All right.

Tim:

So that's all I've got, final thoughts.

Javier:

Final thoughts for me, actually, yeah, I'll go first, I don't have any final thoughts.

Tim:

You don't have any final thoughts, chad, we've covered everything that we want to talk about. No, no, okay, I just want some people to you know, let's boost our, let's get our YouTube going.

Javier:

Yes, to uh. You know, let's boost our uh, let's get our, get our youtube going. Yes, yeah, please. We are only 30 28 away from uh hitting 700 followers on um youtube.

Tim:

So uh, please, and we're about 975 away from hitting a thousand on only fans and, if you like, the commercials.

Chad:

We know you do and you know someone that might need to do an advertising spot on the Funky Panther. Let us know. We'd love to talk to you.

Tim:

And that was all AI generated. That was all AI generated Spoiler alert. I'm talking about the voices. The voices were AI. I know but spoiler alert, javier's was obvious.

Javier:

Javier's was obvious hobbyers was obvious.

Tim:

Chad was pretty good, um. There's a few spots. Mine was pretty good, um, but I will say that we can actually do that voiced over, um, that's not a problem, we'll do it, um, and we'll come up with some fucked up uh ways to promote your business, wow oh, but uh, yeah, my final thoughts.

Javier:

Um shout out to some friends, uh, tasman and natasha. They're uh friends of ours. I know taz listens, but they've been taking shelter dogs every week and they're taking them out on rides, walks, like it's cool to see doing stuff like. I just saw that one of the puppies that they were taking that looks like scooby-doo was.

Tim:

Um was adopted and he was on the red list and you know that we've done uh, we've done some stuff Saving Hope and we plan on working with them again in the future. So, yeah, if you get an opportunity to take care of animals or go and visit up at the shelter or whatever. I mean we're not expecting everybody to be able to take them home and foster them, but if you can do something. That's great. Some of these animals had a hard life and they just need a little bit of love. That's great.

Javier:

Some of these animals had a hard life and they just need a little bit of love. But also, again, if you're not already following us, follow us on all social medias at TheFunkyPanther on Instagram, facebook X, tiktok and YouTube. On YouTube, we are at TheFunkyPanther underscore or just look us up in the search bar. You can always email us at TheFunkyPanther at g gmailcom. Our phone number, hotline, is 817-677-0408. Please subscribe. Show some support, show some love.

Tim:

And hang on.

Chad:

This episode is brought to you by Panther City Foodies, not that other group ran by that bitch, connie. Support your community and eat local.

Javier:

That's right, baby, and if you have any hints or tricks or things that you want us to try, give us a holler. I want to try a new series where it's called Javi Does it, so I will try things that you guys suggest I will. I'm serious, this is my thing. Is social media boss now I want to do stuff like that. If y'all have any ideas of things for me to do or try. I'm all for it. So please let me know.

Chad:

Stay good everybody. I'm Chad, I'm Javier and.

Tim:

I'm Tim and we are the Funky Panther. Bye.

People on this episode

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Co-host
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