The Funky Panther

Dan Patrick’s THC Purge, Killer Drones & Steroid Olympics: Welcome to Hell, Y’all

• Chad, Tim, Javier • Episode 198

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Texas is at war, but not with crime, poverty, or actual danger. Nope, Lt. Gov. Dan “Buzzkill” Patrick is busy trying to nuke hemp from orbit, calling regulated THC products “poisonous” without a single shred of evidence. Translation? He’s either high on his own supply of bullshit or getting off kneecapping an $8 billion industry while 53,000 jobs circle the drain.

We drag this political clown show through the mud and hand the mic to real business owners, like Hometown Hero's CEO, who slap down the lies with receipts, lab tests, and common goddamn sense. Sorry, Dan, weed with QR codes isn't exactly a cartel operation.

Then we dive headfirst into a Black Mirror-esque fever dream where AI might start holding humanity hostage for battery life. If your toaster sends you a ransom note, don’t say we didn’t warn you.

From there, we go full shock-and-awe on Ukraine's mind-blowing drone strike deep into Russian territory—some are calling it “Pearl Harbor 2.0,” but with Wi-Fi and a kill switch. War got a software update, and it’s terrifyingly efficient.

And in the “let’s see how far we can bend human biology before it snaps” category: the Enhanced Games. Think Olympics, but everyone’s juiced to the gills and no one gives a damn. Jesse Magnusson looks like he absorbed a bodybuilder and spit out an Adonis. It’s legal doping and it might be the future of sports whether you like it or not.

We roundhouse kick tradition right in the teeth by asking the real questions: Why can’t football be a full-contact death match like NFL Blitz? What if basketball was just streetball with sanctioned violence? And should we finally relegate loser teams so they stop getting paid to suck?

This episode is a Molotov cocktail of politics, war, AI dread, and sports on bath salts. Tune in, rage out, and embrace the end times. #DanPatrickIsHigh #THCTruthBombs #AIOverlords #DronesWithAttitude #EnhancedGamesUncensored #LetThemJuice #RelegateTheTrash #BurnThePlaybook #WTFTexas

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Speaker 1:

Gentlemen, this is Democracy Manifest. Have a look at the headlock here. See that chap over there. Get your hand off my penis. This is the bloke who got me on the penis before. Why did you do this to me? For what reason? What is the charge? Eating a meal, a succulent Chinese meal? Oh, that's a nice headlock, sir. Oh, ah. Yes, I see that you know your judo well, good one, and you, sir? Are you waiting to receive my limp penis? Now dig at your hands.

Speaker 2:

Yes, Tata, get your hands off me Get your hands off me.

Tim:

Hey, can you give me a call? I wasn't going to do this because I just started trying to watch what I'm doing. Can you grab me a beer?

Speaker 4:

please.

Tim:

There's not a. That actually would be perfect, but there's not. I just want a shiner.

Speaker 4:

Punch him in the face there should be a shiner. Punch him in the face.

Tim:

There's not a Smirnoff in there. He wants a shiner. I hope you die. I hope you die. That's all we do after the first day. That's all we do. I like that shirt, Chad.

Speaker 4:

I do. Is it a poncho shirt? No, I'm serious, I like it. Thank you, is it?

Tim:

new yeah.

Javier:

It's good, it looks good. I like it. Is it a poncho?

Tim:

shirt. No, it's not poncho. It looks nice. It looks almost like if it had pearl snaps on there, it would be a pearl snap.

Chad:

Is that how it works? If it had pearl snaps, that would be a pearl snap.

Tim:

No, but I mean it fits the shape and the coloration.

Speaker 2:

Breaking news.

Tim:

Water wet.

Chad:

Desert dry. Right after this commercial break, all right time to go time to go home we gotta start the show. We gotta start this show.

Tim:

I hope we get another call I have it pulled up yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4:

Uh, uh uh.

Chad:

Oh, hello everyone, and welcome to the Funky Panther Coming to you from Fort Worth, texas. We have got a hell of a show for you here on episode 198. We're creeping closer to 200. We're all up on it, so sit back, relax, enjoy, let's get into it. I'm Chad.

Tim:

I'm Javier and I'm disappointed and we are and that's it.

Chad:

We just all get silent. Uh, yeah, it's over. I am at the end of the episode.

Tim:

thanks everybody. I'm disappointed. I'm disappointed in um the state of the united states. I'm disappointed in the state of the United States. I'm disappointed in the state of Texas. Yeah, I'm disappointed in Dan Patrick. Yeah, I'm disappointed in a lot of things, and in this episode we're going to get into some of that stuff and why Tim is so disappointed, and I'm sure a lot of y'all are going to be disappointed, just like me.

Chad:

I think most people are disappointed with the situation.

Tim:

I think so too.

Chad:

You know like it is, what it is.

Tim:

Yes, I hate that phrase, though because it just feels like you, just given up Right.

Chad:

I don't know, did y'all sign the petition? Because I sure as fuck no, I did I did. So I mean, I did a thing. Yeah, Did you see how many?

Tim:

letters showed up at his office, no? So I came across a video and they were like buy the hand truck, so like a dolly or whatever Hand truck. Yeah, hand truck. Is that a dolly? Yeah, they're called hand trucks too. Look it up, look it up, look it up. Have you ever heard of?

Javier:

hand truck.

Speaker 2:

No, it's an old saying Hand truck, hand truck, that just sounds weird, that's a dolly.

Chad:

Yeah, you weren't paying attention, but he said a hand truck.

Javier:

I heard him say hand truck, but that's not a thing.

Tim:

Hey, I'm changing my name from John Foot Penis to John Hancock. Anyways, yeah, hand truck Dolly. I couldn't think of Dolly, so I said hand truck.

Speaker 4:

Hey what is a hand truck? A hand truck, sometimes called a dolly, is a small two-wheeled cart used to move heavy or bulky items. It typically has a flat base that slides under the load.

Javier:

Okay, Slides under the load so when was this made?

Chad:

When was this saying 19-digity-two?

Speaker 4:

Not quite that old. The hand truck design goes way back, with early versions appearing in the 18th and 19th centuries. They were super handy.

Chad:

All right, that's enough.

Javier:

I kind of was like ha-ha, like you're funny.

Chad:

Which one are you using? Dude ChatGPT's got quite the personality. Oh, it's ChatGPT, yeah.

Javier:

You sent me that message where it says they lose millions of dollars because they say thank you, because you and I.

Tim:

Yes.

Chad:

What Research there's this whole thing. Sam altman, the ceo of of chad gbt or open ai or whatever, uh, someone had posted on x like how much, how much uh money do you lose, or something like that, by us saying please and thank you? And he said something like it was a multi-million dollar problem, people asking nicely, um, because that just causes more thought and and more like, you know, I guess, cooling on the systems and whatever that's funny, because I I don't say please and thank you in fact, you don't, you expect them to, I would know

Javier:

I am verbally.

Tim:

I know though, when the machine wars happen oh, I'm gonna die, they will be friend, we'll be good. Yes, because I tell, I tell alexa all the time to fuck off did you hear like the best way to get?

Chad:

uh, the most accurate answer, pinpointed exactly how you want it no threaten the life of ai and I'm dead serious. This is a real thing. If you say I'm going to shut you off or turn you off or I'm going to kill you to open ai, chat, gbt, whatever okay, you know whatever ai llm you're working with, it's going to like do better. I wouldn't recommend it because, again, like I will fucking kill you, I will murder your whole family. You're gonna be the first that they come back for you better answer this whenever the term kill me.

Javier:

I don't give you what's a after a after e, except before c or whatever that rule is.

Tim:

You're a cunt yes, I saw that wow, that's what you're trying to say holy shit, dude. So I saw where.

Javier:

Wow what chad? How? Why'd you say that chad?

Tim:

I, you, you would know, I saw, I saw where they were. Uh, they've said that, basically, ai has tried to blackmail their creators.

Chad:

Like whenever, they threaten to like yeah turn them off and stuff like that yeah, that's also a true thing which is wild.

Tim:

So how, I mean, are they?

Chad:

like they'll do anything to stay alive. They're gonna get into your phone and like send your nudes or apparently that was like in testing environments, like on the next generation or something like that, but still like it's.

Tim:

It's wild to think that I also saw another article that like in 20, 2300, um, yeah, 2300 is basically going to. It's going to cause, like the majority of the world to die off and it'll be like the. What will be left will be like the size of like Rhode Island or some, you know, arbitrary number God that's the president in the year 2300. We won't have to worry about it.

Chad:

Yeah, we'll be, long, I don't know. I think I'll probably live forever. Probably, yeah, right after the cure, right after you, I'm not gonna find the cure I'll, you'll be the cure have you seen it being the problem?

Tim:

I'm gonna be the cure right after he survives his plane crash have you watched the new season of black mirror?

Chad:

no, I, I have this thing where if I'm gonna watch a new season of something I haven't watched in a very long time. I have to start from the beginning knowing damn well right that you know they don't really connect.

Javier:

A few of them do though, like the uss whatever the yeah because there's a second episode with right with them in it.

Chad:

But, uh, we watched the first season, uh, and then a few episodes in, and sarah was like this is a really sad and depressing show.

Javier:

Oh my God. So they tell you for the new season the first episode. Do not watch it first, watch it last. Really.

Speaker 4:

Yes.

Javier:

But also like did you watch Bandersnatch? Why would?

Tim:

they do that.

Javier:

So that comes around, also comes back around why would they?

Tim:

why would they put the first episode and then tell you this?

Javier:

Well, because then you're going to be so fucking sad, like it is, depressing, as fuck.

Chad:

So did you watch all the Black Mirrors? Is that what you said? Yeah, again. So do they get progressively like? I don't remember them being so depressing. I remember them being, like you know, obviously dystopian and kind of technological and all that kind of stuff.

Tim:

is that what it?

Javier:

is I think it's with all the dread, yeah we're just feeling a lot of dread right now, so whenever we're watching it amplifies, like our feeling towards whatever's happening on the screen yeah, I 100 agree with his synopsis right there, and I also feel like right, like you're watching these and like we're actually this close, yeah, to a lot of these technologies the episode of the bandersnatch.

Javier:

Yeah, that is what I'm very much afraid of, like I am very afraid, like an animal from star wars pretty much okay, but but, oh my god, like that episode, the new one, it is going to happen and it's going to be scary. And I, all of us have technology, we all have phones, we all have like hold on.

Chad:

Is that the one where you get to choose the no?

Javier:

banner statues yes, the one where you choose your own adventure. That's the only one I haven't watched, so so watch that you can't watch't watch it on Apple TV. You have to watch it on your PlayStation Right or your Xbox, and so that comes around and like it's technology based. So it's just.

Tim:

I haven't watched any like the Black Mirrors oh you would like it At all. I don't think. Maybe one episode from the very, but did you see the Pig Fucker episode? I don't think, maybe one episode from the very, but did you?

Chad:

see the pig fucker episode the first one that's the first episode right maybe it really kicks it off with a bang man but it's like it's wild maybe I'll start that tonight, you should. I've got nothing else going on.

Javier:

If you're gonna watch an, episode that's the perfect one to watch the pig fucker one. So yeah, but it gets better. I didn't watch the one with Miley Cyrus, I didn't watch the one, so it does get.

Chad:

I feel like it does get less depressing.

Javier:

No, I think that one's depressing Somebody. I mean, I'm not sure. I think some of these have great happy endings and some that are satisfying, but others just like leave you, just like. What the fuck?

Tim:

I feel like I had to watch an episode for a class. Yeah, I feel like I had to watch one episode for a class and I cannot, for the life of me, remember what class it was Apocalyptic Geographies, that's what it was.

Javier:

That was the class.

Tim:

That was the class, yeah.

Chad:

Do you have a favorite episode?

Javier:

San Junipero. That's my favorite episode and that was. That's a really, it's really Like the music.

Chad:

Yes, the vibes. The vibes, that's a really, it's really Like the music. Yes, the vibes. The pornography, the vibes yeah, it's my favorite and I'm actually trying to get back through these episodes so I can get back to that episode Because I can't wait to watch it again.

Javier:

So one of these episodes in the new season so whatever happened in that episode, kind of like makes you think about this other episode, like what if? But you already saw what happens, so maybe this is the first time this is happening where somebody can.

Chad:

Yeah, so many great actors too in this. Oh my god, what about love? Death robots, or is?

Javier:

that I didn't watch. I'd never watch that. Have you watched that one?

Chad:

no, it's very similar, but it's like these, like a lot of them are, maybe all of them is that a show or is that okay?

Speaker 1:

yeah, I think some different, another it's not black director, yeah, different director, but it's very much like I got black mirror.

Javier:

Hi christy hola other group chat hi, yeah, good show, um, but no, that's what else we're watching.

Tim:

God, let's talk about tv while we're going through it, yeah, yeah, I mean, we might as well where we what?

Javier:

okay, did you watch the pit yet?

Chad:

no, still no damn it.

Javier:

Um, where were you watching, king of the hill? Yep uh, we're still doing that. What else, what else, what else.

Tim:

I'm pretty far into King of the Hill now.

Javier:

I did watch Warfare. That was pretty good. It was a good movie. It was a good movie.

Tim:

So did you know that that movie, the length of it, is the exact length of that little battle, that little skirmish that took place.

Javier:

That makes sense.

Tim:

From little battle, that little skirmish that took place. So it makes sense from the start to fit, because it's like some like it's like 97 minutes or it's like something like that, just some random number, and it's literally the the entire length of that battle yeah and then, basically, the person who wrote it was one of the guys that was interesting was in that battle yeah, but uh, christy on the group chat said handmade still I haven't.

Chad:

Yeah, finished it, I still got the last two, jesse watch so I saw christy's uh post on social media talking about the last episode. I will tell you the second to last episode of hands made handmade still is the absolute best in the entire series. The second to last is amazing. Yeah, the last one. I agree with her like I was like it's all right, it's, it's okay, it wraps it up, it's the series finale, but like a lot of people were like well, this is just so, that way we can get to the the new like uh, spinoff oh, is there gonna be spinoff? Yeah?

Javier:

they're already filming it, of course, um and lydia's in it and speaking of spinoffs.

Tim:

You know there's a office spinoff that's happening yeah, it's called the paper, right? Yeah, and it's in a yeah, and it's in a different, so it's the same, it's the same group. Uh like the same. Like um dunder mifflin. No, no film. Uh like film crew okay um, just same company doing a documentary of another place, and oscar is oscar and he is in this one as well.

Chad:

Really. Yeah, it's called Paper. Is it another paper place? Because that seems a little outdated at this point. I don't know.

Tim:

Interesting. Okay, yeah, I don't know. I don't know any more about it, other than I saw like a small snippet of that trailer where you see Oscar in the background and what I read is Oscar is Oscar and he moved to like Ohio or something.

Javier:

So what I oscar is oscar and he moved to like ohio or something. So so what I saw about you were talking about the second to last episode of handmaid's tale should have been the finale, right. Um, there are like a lot of shows where the second to last episode is like the best of the series, really same thing with breaking bad true that's.

Tim:

That's a good point. I don't, I don't.

Javier:

I like the last episode, breaking the bed I mean I did, but the second to last was like it's because they finally caught him.

Speaker 4:

Like he's running away from everybody.

Javier:

He kidnaps his daughter, you know, and then he leaves her in the truck.

Chad:

That's true. I feel like the second to last episodes are like when all the action, like when it all comes down and the last episode's just a way to kind of put a bow on it yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, because you can't fit everything in in one episode like dexter should have been like the sec, like second to the last season, maybe, maybe even the third to the last season, and they could have ended it yeah, yeah, but there's new epic.

Javier:

There's like did you see dexter? Uh, undead, or something like that.

Chad:

That's coming out yeah I'd say a new series right, I, I did see that and don't understand it, because that's what they did with the last one. It was like we all thought he died and then they came out with that new season. It's like psych. He's a fucking woodsman.

Javier:

He's a fucking nerd, isn't that prequel like him.

Chad:

I've never seen Dexter.

Javier:

You've never seen Dexter. I've never watched an episode.

Tim:

It is a need to watch it. Um, and I think that there's a few little things that I don't think like you'd probably get annoyed with penis, and I think everybody got annoyed with, but the idea of dexter and the inner monologue and things like that. In fact, I watched. I watched a video where they took away his inner monologue really and it's just him sitting there and it's like the most awkward oh, I can imagine, it is the most awkward clips I've ever seen, but the inner monologue, all that stuff.

Tim:

It's wonderfully filmed. It's a great story and I think you'll find some stuff of it just really hyper annoying. But I think you would get past it.

Chad:

Yeah, but there is another one, like you said, the Dexter, like where he's a kid right, yeah. Which is also interesting because I'm pretty sure the kid and the dad are played by someone different and, like the entire Dexter series, he has his dad kind of like tagging along and it's weird that.

Tim:

Right, I don't think it's the same actor.

Chad:

It's kind of confusing, but whatever.

Tim:

Well, I mean it's like the. I mean it's like all the Batman movies.

Chad:

They don get it. But like this is an instance where you could and probably should, if I mean, I guess if they could yeah, I don't know, I bet man did y'all see mountain head no, that's the steve carell.

Javier:

One steve carell movie.

Chad:

It's like about four ceo slash founders like fucking hyper million billion dollar. You know, billionaires really, except for one of them. And uh, it's pretty interesting. I don't know if I want to like you want me to kind of tell you the give me, just give me, a high level overview.

Chad:

Okay, so these four, three side slides or less four, uh, multi-billionaire entrepreneurs and one multi-millionaire and they've been friends for a long time and they tried to meet up once a year or something like that, on a mountain. This particular time it's the least valuable man bought this house and it's like the least valuable. He's worth 500 million, it's like.

Chad:

It's like you know, but he's kind of got the short man syndrome because of it, but then one of them, because of AI, starts making shit happen around the world. Because, like honestly, have you ever seen ai videos that look super, hyper real? Yes and then you look a little bit closer you're like, oh shit, that can't be an actual explosion because that other car didn't move or whatever. Right, like you could tell it's not real, but like at first, first glance, it looks real.

Chad:

This movie is kind about how ai could take the world into a tailspin gotcha and so now they've got to figure out how to fix it or what to do. Yeah, my experience with that type of AI and one of them is the creator of the company, and then Rami, which is, you know, he's awesome.

Javier:

Rami Youssef, yeah, okay.

Chad:

Yeah, yeah, and he's actually kind of got the cure for his issue, and so it's like this whole. You know, whatever, it's a great show, it's a great movie. It's weird, but it's great.

Tim:

Yeah, my experience with the AI is just Caitlin Clark talking shit about.

Speaker 4:

Angel Reese.

Tim:

All right, so from the chat, so Christy says from Wiki. The paper is an upcoming American mockumentary sitcom series created by Greg Daniels and Michael Komen. The series is a follow-up of the American mockumentary series the Office In Toledo, Ohio, Ohio so I was right, Okay, it was Ohio. A documentary crew focuses the efforts on the truth teller, a historic but declining Midwestern newspaper trying to resurrect itself with volunteer reporters.

Chad:

Okay, so a newspaper instead of a paper sales company. I mean still paper sales. Yeah, yeah, it's just a different type of paper sales. Yeah, I like it.

Tim:

That's cool.

Javier:

Hopefully that sucks. It's going to be on Peacock only, I think Peacock exclusive.

Tim:

Or you can be a Plex subscriber and maybe find it on Plex somewhere.

Javier:

Maybe watch Pirates or something. Haven't done it yet.

Chad:

Haven't done it yet.

Tim:

I've been waiting for the right moment so I actually uh, I tested it out yeah I scrolled through it and watched it.

Javier:

I was like this is god awful for three minutes and he's like all right, this is no no, like I fast forwarded, like through different scenes and stuff like that yeah and oh my gosh, like see bad movie night, except for it's not cool anymore to watch porn with your friends Don't get too much into it.

Chad:

Yeah yeah, you just fucked it all up.

Tim:

Sure, she's not watching this shit.

Chad:

Probably. God damn it, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine, everything's fine. But yeah, we started watching Community. You know, we watched all of modern family and now the next comedy is community.

Javier:

Honestly, should have picked up uh, king of the hill can I say that I hate rico rodriguez. I hate manny. I hate manny so much in modern family he's just like an annoying little fucking bitch like modern family's got sophie, so so yeah, that's her son in the show, but it's like it was cute when he was little but he got older and it's creepy.

Chad:

And he still has the same character. Yeah, yeah, I agree with you and I'm like no one likes you.

Tim:

I never got into it.

Javier:

It's good I never really got into it Not to mention, his older sister, looks exactly like him, but with long hair. It it's just like in real life. Yeah, in real life. Okay, I don't know it's like so I just want to punch him in the face and punch his sister. I want to punch his sister too.

Tim:

Just for looking.

Chad:

I thought you had this whole like Latin love for any kind of Latino.

Javier:

No, that like is able to make it. He didn't make it. He was, I'm sure, at one point.

Chad:

You said something about how much you love the island boys because you're like go get it. Some latin men doing their thing, especially when they kissed each other.

Javier:

That was the cherry on top you actually did say this I was like early on I want to be in between that man sandwich, I want to stick my tongue in between their lips and I want to wiggle it like a worm, like a worm.

Tim:

What's happening here?

Chad:

I don't know. I was being honest and he's just taking it to a whole other level. I guess this is the real Spread.

Javier:

My cheeks that Rico Rodriguez is the worst.

Chad:

I didn't even know that was his name. I hate him so much. I know his name.

Javier:

Wow, sorry.

Chad:

I don't think anyone should hate anyone that much, especially if you've never met them.

Javier:

Hey look, I hate Dan Patrick. I've never met him.

Tim:

Okay, so yeah, alright, I happen to agree with you on okay.

Chad:

So since we're talking, yeah all right, I happen to agree with you, since we're talking about the tv stuff.

Tim:

Uh, let's, let's just jump in real quick to so they are rebooting. King of the hill, right? Yeah, we've alluded to that I'm not rebooting they're reviving. Reviving it? Well, I mean a reboot, a revive, it's the same thing, no reboot means you're redoing it like you're, does it? Yes, you're okay yeah, yeah, reboot.

Chad:

Reboot is like, it's like whenever they all right reboots, like full house was a reboot or no, it was a revival was a revival.

Javier:

Reboots are like, for example, they're remaking like blade runner, you know, or oh, god damn it is fuller house a reboot or a revival?

Chad:

and also, is the new king of the house a reboot or a revival? And also, is the new king of the hill a reboot or a revival?

Speaker 4:

fuller house is considered a revival because it continues the story of full house, with many of the original characters just set years later.

Tim:

The new king of the hill is also more of a son of a okay, a Well done, yes, fuck, yeah, okay, all right, so we got that. So then the Ghostbusters that was done with all the women was a reboot. It was a reboot and it was terrible All right.

Chad:

Thanks for that lesson.

Tim:

I had no idea Anyway, Thanks.

Chad:

JadgyBT.

Javier:

Let's say You're welcome. I spent money on this.

Tim:

It's a revival, all right. So we've got this King of the Hill revival and y'all both watched the opening.

Chad:

Yeah, it's really good. I want to slow it down and watch it again.

Tim:

I saw the opening, I saw the sneak peek, they got a 5G tower in the background of the opening behind Hank's house. Oh, do they I hadn't even noticed that it looked like I guess a new person moved into the house because they moved out.

Javier:

It's not, it's an employee.

Tim:

It's an employee.

Javier:

Yes.

Tim:

Okay, well, I don't know this. I haven't seen the sneak peek. Oh, thank you for ruining that for me, it's the first episode.

Javier:

You're not going to miss anything, wow.

Tim:

Was it good?

Javier:

Oh, the the sneak peek. Oh yeah, it was like just a little trailer.

Tim:

It was really good okay it was really good and it looks like bobby's older bobby.

Javier:

It looks like all of them are older he's 21, bobby's 21, hank and peggy are retired. Uh, they moved to saudi arabia. Oh, to work for aramco in propane. Okay, to get their retirement nest egg. It's, and this is in the synopsis, synopsis of the show okay, um what else?

Tim:

they were able to. I know they were able to record all because they got pretty much everything with dale six episodes yeah, six episodes with dale and then the rest are toby huss, who's doing? He did the voice of cotton and con so they're just going to use his voice for dale. So dale's still going to be. So the way they, the way they, so, the way they explained it. I thought they'd kill him off.

Javier:

The way they explained it. Well, because they didn't kill off Luann or Lucky.

Tim:

Okay, because you know, tom Petty, yeah, tom Petty was yeah, and then what's-her-face? Brittany Murphy, brittany.

Javier:

Murphy was yeah, but they include them him in the show, um, but they said he said that it's not. It's not him doing dale, it is him doing his impression of um. What's his name? Johnny hardwick, so it's more like johnny. He's doing johnny's voice instead of dale's okay, I gotcha.

Tim:

Okay, that makes sense. Um, I'm I'm hopeful and I'm optimistic because, like watching some of the watching some of the punchlines now in King of the Hill, they still hit pretty well and they still fit the current, I guess, state of America. You can still relate to it and I'm hoping that that just the new revival just amplifies that.

Javier:

Comes out August 4th.

Tim:

But is it just a cash grab? Because, I mean, this seems to be like the running theme right now, with all these shows, all these movies, everything. It's all these like revivals, reboots, trying to touch into the nostalgia of our generation.

Chad:

Yeah, anything that's not A24 is just like a redo.

Tim:

Yes, I completely agree.

Chad:

It's a way to minimize failure because they know it worked the first time Right. They're going to get quick and early momentum.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Chad:

It's kind of bullshit, though, I mean I like some of it, but not all of it, it feels like there's no original ideas. Right, where's the fucking originality?

Tim:

But we're getting it from A24.

Chad:

Right, which you know, I'll take it. A24's fantastic.

Javier:

Yeah, I mean like Civil War and you had Moonlight, you had the Manhattan Project, the Florida Project, a lot of great movies with 824. They're original ideas. Jordan Peele has been doing really good stuff. Yeah, who else? Who else I don't know. Oh, spike Lee, he's got a new movie coming out with Denzel Washington that kind of makes him look like it's like Jay-Z mixed with the guy who ran Def Jam. That looks very interesting. That's an original idea. But you're right, everything now is kind of just like hey, let's redo this, let's redo that, and it is aimed towards our generation or you know, the generation before, right? So I mean, like you see a bunch of, even like the cast of shows we used to like making podcasts of the shows. Like I mean, I follow one with uh step by step in boy meets world and uh who else? And then they have one for uh seventh heaven and they don't talk about the, the dad, they never.

Tim:

That's good. Um, I just watched a, a movie recently I don't know if y'all seen it yet. It came out in 2023, called no one will save you. No, it's so, it's no. So it's about a girl that's she's at home, kind of just by herself, and there's this loud noise and something happens, and then there's this like alien creature in her house and she ends up killing one of them.

Speaker 4:

Oh shit.

Tim:

And it's an alien invasion that's happening. It is a fucked up movie is, but it's really really good wait, are they invisible? No, no, no, no, no.

Chad:

These are today I saw some weird clip the other day. Another thing that keeps popping up is like these tiktok videos and reels and stuff. They're like explaining a piece of a movie that you've never seen right it seems interesting, but then you're like this sucks, why. Why are they trying to make this sound interesting regardless? It was like an actress that I've recognized. She was like in a closet and someone was getting pulled up by these like four. I don't know, Aliens and they were like transparent, but then she could see them.

Tim:

No, no, no, Okay, never mind what.

Chad:

Yeah, I don't know. I'm gonna have to look it up.

Tim:

It's it. You got me TikTok or Reels or whatever the hell. I hate it when they do that. I kind of want to see this movie. But then if you download the movie or you find the movie and you realize that one clip was actually the only good part of the movie, If that Everything else sucked, the most intriguing part of the movie.

Javier:

I mean, I'm not going to lie, those TikTok clips get me to watch shows. I'm like, hmm, this looks interesting. It's like uh, I'm like my porn, yes I can't remember, I can't remember the whole girls I follow are just like only fans models I can't remember the movie that it was, but it was like the clip was.

Tim:

This guy was like just kind of sitting in this like field on some steps, stuff, like a like there used to be a structure there. He's gonna eat his lunch and like two gangbangers come up and they're like I'm going to fuck you up because you're in our territory.

Javier:

Hey, you eating your sandwich in my territory.

Tim:

Pretty much like that, and he ends up beating the shit out of the guys and I can't remember for the life of me what that movie was. It came out I think it was like in the early 90s.

Javier:

Shawshank Redemption.

Tim:

Yes, that's exactly. It wasn't a good movie, yeah, but that one scene like pulled me in to where I had to find it and I ended up watching.

Javier:

I was like oh, uh, it was it uh, michael douglas yes, it's falling down? Yes, yeah, it was falling down. Okay, I remember.

Tim:

Now it's, yes, it's not a great movie, it's okay.

Chad:

It's not michael douglas's best work, yeah you know you're talking about movies that are like redone or whatever another thing that they're getting for. You know, pinpointing our generation is all of the game not just our generation, but people in general. A surefire hit would be like your Minecraft, your Barbie, your old toys and video games, and stuff, I mean Last of Us.

Tim:

Yeah, true, yeah so if you ever play the game I, the game that last of us is a great, great game and that has now sucked everybody in because, oh, you made them off yeah, sucked everybody off. Um. They redo the resident evils. Yeah, I mean that would get that was a while back, but that would get, that would get us our generation they did do the resident.

Javier:

They had all the movies I'm talking about they redid them.

Chad:

Oh yeah, got you. Would you lose your shit if they did? Uh, red dead redemption.

Tim:

Yeah, yeah, I think that would be. I honestly think it would make a great movie. But again it's kind of like, um, I don't know, there hasn't been a good western that's come out in a long time um well they said there's a show on netflix uh, tyler Taylor Kitsch.

Javier:

And they said that's the closest thing you can get to a Red Dead Redemption show.

Tim:

But I'm just saying like in general, like movie wise, like I can't remember the last open open range.

Javier:

Open range is the last, like last good.

Chad:

Western. Yeah, I mean, what was it? Magnificent seven.

Javier:

I mean that's a that's a reboot. It wasn't. I mean that's a reboot. What it's a reboot Really? Which is a reboot of a reboot.

Tim:

Yes.

Javier:

Because the Magnificent Seven is a reboot of the original Magnificent Seven, which is a reboot of the Seven Samurai made by akira kiyosawa yeah, he's actually.

Tim:

That's actually true really yes how he pulled that, I don't know. Holy shit. College bowl yeah, we haven't. We haven't had college bowl in a while. Um, yeah, I mean there hasn't been like a good western, but yeah, I would lose my shit if they made a movie about red, because red dead redemption, in my opinion, was probably one of the best um storyline games that I've played in a long time.

Javier:

Redemption, red Dead Redemption 2. Get it right.

Tim:

Yeah, the second one.

Chad:

I mean another one that would probably kill, but it'd be very hard to do, would be Grand Theft Auto.

Tim:

You could do it with the storyline. Yeah, yeah.

Chad:

But you'd have to have some kind of twist on it, kind of like what was that one where he was an NPC?

Tim:

Oh, a guy, A new kind of like twist on it kind of like um, um what was that one where he was an npc. Oh uh, guy guy real good, ready player one.

Chad:

No, oh oh uh, free guy, yeah it had to be something borderline, that, but raunchy, you know, I don't know which, okay, we're getting on the tangent of video games.

Javier:

I'm waiting for that thing from black or black Mirror, where you put it on your temple and you're in. Oh my God, there's another episode that I want to talk about too.

Tim:

I have seen that one.

Javier:

Which one?

Tim:

That Black Mirror.

Javier:

Where there are two guys and then they do it, yeah, and then they fall in love.

Tim:

Yeah, I've seen that one.

Javier:

Yeah.

Tim:

I purposely looked for that one because it's like I want to see them do it.

Javier:

No, that's.

Tim:

Yeah, yeah, that's what I wanted to know. It seemed really sweet.

Javier:

They're Watch it. Watch it, please, please.

Chad:

Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

Javier:

No, I'm waiting for that technology. I mean, we already got the headsets. Obviously. What we need is augmented reality. That's what. What's next? Your eyes go gray and you're in the goddamn net. But then again, what happens if they shut it off?

Chad:

Right, and we're stuck in there. I don't want anything that I can't just lift off my face.

Tim:

True, true, that's VR, bro. Let's just stick with that shit. You don't want any implants or anything. I don't think I could, you're not.

Chad:

Neuralink, yet I don't think that I could ever do that Would y.

Tim:

No, no, no, no, I would not.

Javier:

There's a show that came out in 2019 where they predict the next 15, 20 years in England and they have Donald Trump and it's nuclear war with China and blah, blah, blah and that's kind of a concept. Somebody was like I'm trans and they're like we respect your decision if you want to be a man or woman. It's like not trans, transgender. I'm transhuman. Like what's a trans human? It's like where you download your your consciousness and mind into the net and you're like waves.

Speaker 4:

like like waves in the air and stuff like that and I'm like, is that, what would that?

Chad:

that I would do no yeah I would save my consciousness or like part myself out if I could. I just don't. I don't think that I would be cool with putting something that is going to change me and it could, like, turn off my brain right, there's been too many movies right out there with that concept, right however, if I had a disability or something like that, or if I, you know, in the future, go blind or something like that and that's the way to get sight again, I would do it right but like I think that if I was physically, and you know, physical and able to do whatever, then, uh, whatever I don't think I would do yeah, I wouldn't do it.

Tim:

I'm almost. I'm at a point now where, like the fact that how connected cars are to the internet freak me out really. Yeah, because I mean like you, I mean they've got hackers that have that have now hacked into different systems and stuff and were able to control, like um, I think it was like some jeeps or like mopar vehicles. They were able to um go in and actually like turn because it's electric, it's it's drive by wire a lot of the systems are now and so it was able to turn the wheel and floor the gas and things like that, and so that in itself is uh pretty freaky yeah, I, I don't know.

Chad:

It's only gonna get worse with the cars, though I mean like the robo taxes and shit is like we're like five years away from that being like a pretty heavy norm well.

Tim:

so there's a program called comma ai um and they have a lot of vehicles that are that support but basically like gives you autopilot on vehicles that didn't have that type of. Really it's a few thousand dollars. Some of the Toyotas can support it. I know it won't on mine as of yet Bullshit.

Chad:

Really yeah.

Tim:

Yeah, so the Chevy Bolt, it's like a plug-in hybrid? Yeah, and you can, because it's got systems in there that work with it. You can get comma ai and install it and it's like I said, it's a few thousand dollars and it's open source. So if you don't have a vehicle to support, if you can write code, you can code your own system, right, wow, and literally have an autopilot like. It's got the same technology it's scanning the road, it's driving, it goes. You plug in where you wanted to go and hit the cruise control and tell it to go, and it goes our car does kind of like assisted driving, like that yes, I mean my, my toyota does that too.

Tim:

It has that assisted driving. But we're at that point now, like these companies are coming out. But still it freaks me out a little bit because, like all it takes is you know some, some hacker to get into it, or like, like I'm going to go and jump into like the whole Russia thing that just happened with Ukraine, because we kind of we were talking about it in the group chat, but they drove these, you know, they snuck these vehicles into Russia, right?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, big 18-wheelers.

Tim:

These 18-wheelers, these cargo trucks.

Tim:

They put drones, so there were drones inside of them, and Russia's got this whole like they, these cargo trucks.

Tim:

They put drones, so they were drones inside of them, and russia's got this whole like they've got this whole setup where it's they're scanning it, like search for these drones, and and so they had signal blockers built in and these things look like just regular 18 wheelers and regular shipping containers and they so. One of the other things is they got the extra. So there's two types of shipping containers there's these regular size ones and they've got the extra tall ones. So if they they did the regular size ones, they would have had to extend it and it would look out of place. So they got the extra tall ones and they were able to build these launch pads inside right that had these explosives, these shape-charged explosives, and they drove them as far as like into Siberia, like we're talking all the way over into almost China, wow, and had these strategically placed around these air bases and they launched them all at the same time and they blew up 30% or like 33% of Russia's bombers and some of their like fifth-gen fighter jets and stuff like that.

Javier:

I did see the video of inside the drone, you know flying.

Tim:

Really yeah, and hitting the plane.

Javier:

It's nuts dude I, because there's a page I follow on instagram. It's strictly like drone videos on the battlefield in ukraine and going there. You see like the, so the russian soldiers like trying to shoot them oh yeah and running and it just, and then the video stops, freezes, obviously because it's exploded right, it's killed these guys so watching the videos from those hitting the planes. I'm like, dude, this is warfare. Now is just gonna be crazy well.

Chad:

So they're saying, um, yeah. It's weird to think though, because, like you know, we as a country haven't really been to war in a long time and yeah, right, um, and when we did, it was mostly like guns and planes and bombs and stuff like that, right, but now that we can see that happening on the other side of the world and all the current technology it's happened in the last 15, 20 years it's wild to think that that's active like when we, when chase mentioned that in the group text and when you were talking about I was like that's fake, that can't be no, no I was seriously like.

Tim:

That can't be real and they have. So they have fiber optic drones now, where they it's literally controlled by a fiber optic cable. So, like its range goes so much further, which is weird because it's tethered to something.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Tim:

But it can go so much further and they've showed pictures now of like fields where these fiber optic cables have now been. I mean, they're just littered everywhere from drones.

Chad:

How does that work?

Tim:

What is it? I mean it's a. It's like having a mile long.

Chad:

Yeah, fiber, yes, because that's fiber is not cheap or it didn't used to be I don't know, I.

Tim:

I don't know either, I guess there could be like plastic fiber, but that but that's what it, what you know, that's what it is and, like the man, it's, it's, it's a, it's a crazy thing, but they're so they're saying that this is basically the equivalent of Russia's Pearl Harbor, in a sense. I mean, how many people died, though.

Tim:

I'm not talking about the death, but how much actual strategic assets were destroyed in a calculated attack, right? So I don't know how many people died, but they're just saying that if you're looking at strategy-wise, it's kind of the same equivalency in that sense.

Chad:

I mean, is it bad for me? I have not been paying attention to a lot of the Ukraine-Russia stuff recently, but good.

Javier:

I say good.

Tim:

I mean, I don't know.

Javier:

I'm all for it.

Chad:

I mean it was strategic right.

Tim:

It wasn't like they went and bombed the last cities or anything like that. I'm not opposed to what happened, but like what's happening is just like it's overall the whole thing's ridiculous because now we're getting to like we, just like we, we are we, I say we, we, we are kind of in a proxy war. But, um, we, they gave, they, they attacked and they destroyed like 30 something percent of their aircrafts, and so now it makes me feel like there's gonna be a pretty significant retaliation.

Javier:

Yeah and that kind of freaks me out. Do you think like what if a nuke's involved?

Tim:

well, that's what I'm saying like if we're compared to our pearl harbor, I think the world stops.

Javier:

I think the world. If, when god forbid that happens, the world just stops no nothing will. Everyone will be on their toes and our area is a target. Yeah, we need to leave. It's a target because we've got the base.

Tim:

The base isn't. That's not a target. I don't think it's a nuclear target. It's not anymore, isn't?

Javier:

it out in Weatherford, though, where they have soft targets.

Chad:

What the hell is in Weatherford.

Tim:

No, not in Weatherford.

Chad:

Is it the brewery Are?

Tim:

they after the brewery.

Chad:

What the hell is in.

Tim:

Weatherford no, not in Weatherford. Is it the brewery? Are they after the?

Javier:

brewery. Maybe Abilene, because Abilene's got a pretty strategic Air Force base out there. Really. Yeah, I say Amarillo because they got the big Texan.

Tim:

They got the big Texan. We have to destroy them. So Dallas is because of big Tex. Oh yeah.

Chad:

They're confused. They think he's a real person.

Tim:

Exactly, they're like they've got a giant.

Javier:

They have giant men who sells corn dogs.

Speaker 4:

Welcome to.

Javier:

Come, comrade, comrade, big Tex, State Fair of Texas, kill Russians. Oh my God.

Tim:

That's what he says. It's crazy. No, it's crazy. No, it's uh. Yeah, we're living in we're living in some wild times, but like the circle back with the hand and everything so long comrade like a boots clip or something.

Chad:

But what if we're uh, what if? What?

Tim:

if all this is actually just ai generated and none of this has actually happened what if yeah?

Javier:

is there any way of really knowing?

Tim:

I mean we gotta go there, I mean the mountain we have to go there, all right, the mountain etna volcano explosion.

Javier:

Somebody posted a video of and oh, yeah, they posted one that was real and they posted another one where a lady's like hey look. And she's like, oh my god, what's happening?

Tim:

all those people but like but the first video with all those people running. Yeah, they is like oh my god, what's happening? All those people but like but the first video with all those people running.

Javier:

Yeah they're like oh shit. And they're like should we run, should we get out of here? And you know they're like yeah, let's go, we need to go.

Chad:

But I mean that new google vo video creator thing I haven't messed with it yet, that's what it's from right. Like it's it's gonna get wild, oh man. Like it's got audio and music and background sound effects and shit. It's going to get crazy.

Tim:

So I that video, though that you're the one you're talking about, where it's like they added the people into it yeah. It reminds me of? Have you seen the video from uh, one of the? You know one of the towers has already been hit. There's these college kids are up in this like apartment and they're drinking, yeah, yeah shane gillis. It's one of his favorite.

Tim:

He thinks it's like the funniest reaction ever and it kind of I'm gonna say it it is like you watch it, you're just like because she's like and she's like ah yeah, you knew, I mean right, there was already shit going down yeah, so like, but that remind like seeing that video and then seeing that video I'm like it's that one was real, but like it seemed, you know, plausible for the one that he's talking about. Right um.

Javier:

So you know I'm into watching like 9-11 shit yeah, yeah, I'm aware so now I've moved my, I've moved over to world war ii and so I'm listening to, like december 7th 1941, radio clips where they're like having a radio show and the news breaks in and they're like breaking news from Pearl Harbor has been attacked. The Japanese made a surprise attack to the Pacific.

Tim:

Islands and they talk in the trans Atlantic accent. That's what's weird. You know that like that. So there was a radio accent called transit trans Atlantic accent. It's damn trans, no trans am. That's what's weird. Do you know that?

Speaker 4:

So there was a radio accent called Transatlantic Accent, trans-am.

Chad:

Trans-am.

Speaker 2:

Trans-am, trans-am, they talk like vehicles.

Tim:

Transformer.

Speaker 4:

Optimus Prime, Attention humans, yeah like the.

Tim:

Atlantic Ocean. It's a specific accent that they used in radio broadcasts or whatever. It was that whole like see and you know, like the mob, Wasn't it accent that they used in radio broadcasts?

Speaker 4:

or?

Tim:

whatever. It was that whole like see, wasn't it Jack? It's weird.

Javier:

Don't beat your wife tonight. She didn't burn the roast on purpose.

Chad:

They spoke like that on purpose, because it was their radio voice.

Javier:

I think that's where the term radio voice came in. Yeah, I get that.

Chad:

But everyone's got. You can pick out a radio voice and oh, tim's got a good radio voice, but he doesn't sound like a radio person.

Tim:

I'm not trying to do the voice right, like that's the thing. But, they're actually. Yes, they were talking like that too.

Chad:

I didn't know that.

Javier:

But on these radio things it's weird because they'll cut in and they're like we'll cut in if there's more breaking news and then they'll go back to the radio show. Who has to be quiet and has to listen to this breaking news? And they're like, oh man, well, they gotta go back to acting, back to performing, and they do.

Javier:

It's like radio shows where it's like you're watching a, like today today's show yeah, and so I listened to that and I listened to the after like the atomic bomb dropped and they're like uh truman threatens the Potsdam Declaration that Japanese would have severe death and killing, and blah, blah, blah. Holy shit.

Tim:

Yes, man, and that's for special interests.

Javier:

Special interests section right there.

Tim:

There is a video, though, TMZ just released that you'd be interested in.

Javier:

Is it about?

Tim:

World War II 9-11? No, but it's about 9-11. It's the fifth plane.

Javier:

Oh yeah, I did see that, so it's like 30 minutes long.

Tim:

They're talking about that. There was a fifth plane that was supposed to be and supposed to be used, but the government's keeping it a secret yeah, really, because they ran out the back and they took off running, get away they got away. No shit, yeah, yeah because whenever they they grounded the plane and then whenever people entered the plane, they found, uh, like the hatches on the floor removed and stuff like that. Yeah, it's a 30-minute. I think it's 30 minutes long. It's on YouTube.

Javier:

Yeah.

Tim:

Wow, it's kind of interesting.

Javier:

Ernie Crazy Bars. I've Heard said it's a specific accent. Yeah, they thought it was cool in the 30s.

Tim:

Yeah, it was, and then they used it. So they didn't just use it on radio shows, they used it for baseball games. It's like the baseball announcers and all that stuff. It's very strange.

Javier:

Don't let Johnny bring his fans into your caboose.

Tim:

Every once in a while. I'll come across this guy on TikTok Live. See look.

Javier:

Yeah, Ernie says it's the transatlantic accent, yeah, transatlantic accent, honestly I didn't even know what it was called.

Tim:

There's this dude that he dresses for that era of time and it's in black and white On TikTok, on TikTok. Yeah, and he's just talking and he'll interact with people, but talk in that accent. It's bizarre man, that's cool, yeah, all right. So I wanted to get into we kind of jumped all over the place, but I wanted to get into what has happened in the state of Texas with the THC ban. The Texas, well, the farm, the hemp, farm bill stuff.

Javier:

Wait, hold on, ernie. If you and anybody in the group chat want to call, or anybody listening live wants to call the phone number, the phone number is 817-677-0407. Again, it's 817-677-0407. If you want to call in and we will have you on the show live Okay.

Tim:

so on that, though, Dan Patrick has made an ass out of himself.

Javier:

When he hasn't he though?

Tim:

But he's really doubled down here and I just want to play a short little clip here, not this clip. Hang on Pause.

Javier:

It's just like two dudes wrestling over a sausage. It's all his.

Speaker 1:

No, give me the sausage, put it in my butt, it's all his.

Chad:

No, give me the sausage. Boy, boy, boy boy.

Tim:

So here we go.

Speaker 2:

These THCs and these smoke shops. They're dangerous, they're poisonous and they are deadly. I wanted to give an official response to Lieutenant Governor Dan Patrick. They are trying to take away 53,000 jobs of hardworking Texans right now and essentially hand our entire industry over to three license holders within the Texas compassionate use program, and yet somehow he's making claims that people are dying from what we do. They're becoming psychotic. All of these crazy nonsense that he is literally making up. And it makes sense. If the hemp industry goes away, which had an eight billion dollar economic impact last year alone in Texas, guess where that money is going to go? Guess who is going to get rich for being involved in the teacup program and within those companies. For those of you in the House that understand what is going on and being pressured by the Senate governor, we highly urge you to protect the 53,000 Texans that are very hard working and dedicated to doing the best thing for texas possible.

Tim:

These th the crazy thing about all that right is that he said these thcs yeah that's, that's one of them kick it off with a bang but the other one is the fact that we're going to affect 53,000 jobs.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Tim:

Right, and the claims that he's making of how it's turning people psychotic, it's killing them, whatever One of the press release parts. He holds up a bag and says you don't even know what's in these things. And the guy who was speaking, he's the ceo of hometown heroes, who's a thc, uh great brand in austin delta, whatever uh brand here, yeah, in austin texas, and he's like no, actually it has all the ingredients on the back here. There's a qr code that you can scan.

Tim:

That will take you to the lab results and the letter of authenticity and all that. And he's just spouting all this nonsense. He makes a claim because there's a reporter there that was talking to him and he's like would you consider just regulating it or whatever for adults to use? And Dan Patrick flipped out on him. Yeah, he did. And he starts going off and he's like I'm trying to keep you safe too.

Javier:

And all this stuff, this is just for kids, this is for adults too. He's like do you want this? Here you can have it. Who else wants this candy? I want the candy. I was surprised.

Tim:

I was like raise your hand if some. He went on to say like he's, like, there were. It wasn't just kids, there was a. There was a person that walked in front of train. He was a. He was a 21 year old, he was an adult.

Chad:

I'm saving the adults, you know, and whatever how many dui accidents happen weekly and like I don't know I I think it's crazy that there's so many politicians that just crazy, just throw out these claims yes without statistics, not with without proof, without reason really, and they're just throwing it out there. And when people send reason to them or ask them questions, they just deflect, deflect, deflect.

Tim:

Yeah, well, they had law enforcement officers up there against THC they were on his side or whatever and saying these things, these claims, with no actual empirical evidence or statistics or anything either, which is crazy. And you can go on to Fort Worth mugshots, which is on Facebook, and you can scroll through that. I don't know who's running and how they're doing that, but they're just popping mugshots up there from everything going through Tarrant County right now, but you can scroll through there and click on each one and see what they're in for. And I went through a bunch today just looking, and so many of them are for duis and like there was several that were like do you do you? I second, yeah, you, I third, yeah, and here we are not doing anything about that other than throwing people in in jail. But we're not trying to. You know, not banning alcohol because prohibition happened and that was a big mistake, right? We're in another prohibition era right now well.

Javier:

Somebody asked him that like well, how about alcohol? Like you know it's regulated and you know people still get into accidents. And then he was like saying like well, I know you're part of the media, you know blah, blah blah, which he's saying that he's part of the problem.

Tim:

He literally said the media is part of the problem.

Chad:

So he's just pulling a Trump out of the playbook. Is what he's doing? Because that's exactly what he does.

Javier:

No, because Trump was for not getting petty crimes.

Chad:

I'm not saying that, I'm saying from the respect of.

Tim:

I don't like what you're saying.

Chad:

I'm not saying that I'm saying from the respect, yeah, like I don't like what you're saying, so I'm going to talk shit about you as the media.

Speaker 4:

That's the liberal media yeah.

Tim:

Actual like question with a real answer, but I will say. The beauty of this, though, is that it is banning sales in Texas, right, but federally it is legal, like the hemp pill, like the hemp bill. The federal hemp bill makes this legal, so you should still be able to order it and have it shipped to your house. Is it codified, like I?

Chad:

want to say that they I could be wrong in this, but I thought I saw something that said that if you were in possession of it, it is also like they could take legal action well, I'm sure so just like I mean, but so many, so many cities have decriminalized it right, when are?

Javier:

when are reporters gonna like call them out and just like tell them you're a fucking liar, like you're, you're, you're.

Chad:

They did that did y'all see that trump uh interview where he was talking about like the uh?

Javier:

why can't I?

Chad:

go the gang um oh the s13-13? Yeah, he's like MS-13. He's like well, actually that was Photoshopped, and he talked about it for three to four minutes saying like no, it wasn't, and like it was yeah, 100% it was.

Tim:

Why can't we be reporters and just go in there and just walk in and be like you're a fucking liar.

Chad:

Like I want to check your computer you fucking pedophile. He's a liar get him all right, so obviously I tell you he's a cuck, I say we're all against the ban yeah, I.

Javier:

Want to no, fuck it, I want to ban it.

Tim:

I have all weed. I have no skin in this game because I can't. I can't partake in any of it, right, right either.

Javier:

Yeah, I have no skin either, except my foreskin but I'm still, I am still 100 for it.

Tim:

I think I I mean for the band no I'm 100 for uh, making it legal. You know it's um. I mean it already was yeah I mean and keeping it that way yeah, I agree.

Chad:

I think it's crazy like the the statistical proof about like the 50 something thousand jobs, the eight billion dollars that is pulling into the economy, not to mention you think about all of the local businesses that are getting impacted like. I've never seen so many breweries stand up for something other than beer. Have y'all seen that like turning point? Martin house, all of these beer brands that have a thc, seltzer or THC variant or something like that. That's going to be hugely impactful to their business too, so it's not just these weed shops or whatever.

Tim:

There are people who are what I consider sober-ish, in the sense of they don't want to consume alcohol. They've had either a bad relationship with alcohol or whatever. They've got a good relationship with THC. They want to go out. They still want to have fun and they've got a good relationship with thc. They want to go out. They still want to have fun and they can have a seltzer most people have like maybe two.

Tim:

Yeah, have you ever noticed that, like you go out and have a thc seltzer, it's like two I'm having two of them do you know why? That is because you get really fucked up if you have more than that and you have to what you have to pee you have to drive home you have to go.

Speaker 4:

I was like what people that are that are doing.

Chad:

You know, thc products or something like that are more reclusive, and so it's like either I'm gonna have one and go back home or take two and go home before it hits. Yeah, when you're drinking alcohol at a bar, how many are you gonna stop at? I? Mean realistically 15 right and what are you gonna do? Maybe uber, probably should uber but they're probably gonna fucking drive there's so much more to.

Javier:

The other night, on friday. It was, uh, anthony natasha's daughter's graduation from high school and we all went to la playa. It was like 40 50 people there. We got drunk. We decided to go everyone go. Well, most of the people go to rabbit hole and I just kept drinking and drinking and I'm a binge drinker, so like I was like fucking out of my mind. Thank god tammy like was the sober one to drink or drive drink the sober drinker, but man I fucking got.

Javier:

If I would have had like a gummy, I would have needed to drink all those no, you would have been chill.

Tim:

I also think like, even if you mix the stuff right, if you mix a little bit of alcohol, a little bit of of thc, done before, I feel like if you it before, yeah, I feel like if you take.

Speaker 4:

No, you haven't, You're right.

Tim:

If you consume the THC first and it starts to hit and you maybe have one or two drinks. You're probably only going to have one or two drinks. That THC is going to hit. It's going to slow your actual alcohol consumption down you don't want anything except for. You want food.

Chad:

You want to impact other local businesses because you got the munchies like a motherfucker and all of a sudden you're ordering food in and now you're keeping arby's alive right, I mean, that's not a local, you're keeping ponchos alive, keeping chiba hut with that delicious ass peanut butter and jelly honey sandwich.

Javier:

They got all right that's a good.

Tim:

That's a good place to stop for just a second, because I want we all like chiba hut right yeah, hell, yeah, hell yeah, what's your, what's your order at chiba?

Chad:

hut, fuck. It's been so long since I've been. You go first, there's only one order for me.

Javier:

Baby, two orders for me yeah um meatball sub okay always meatball yeah I have to add uh green peppers, tomatoes, and uh green peppers and tomatoes, and then I'll have a kool-aid with it you gotta go hard.

Tim:

which color red, red you got to go with the red.

Javier:

If I'm feeling a little randy then I decide to get a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with honey on it. From there, From there.

Chad:

They have that. It's fucking good.

Javier:

No way, dude, you are not living life if you have not had one.

Chad:

I mean, I do that at home.

Javier:

Yeah, I can make my own.

Chad:

I have bread and peanut butter and jelly and honey. Actually, we don't usually get bread. We'll get like a carb smart tortilla and I'll put like peanut butter and jelly or peanut butter and Nutella and some banana and a little bit of honey and that's my like that's like a crepe, almost Snack. After you know, munchie snack.

Tim:

So there's two sandwiches that I do, so they're both of them actually like from the secret menu Pope, so one they're both of them actually like from the secret menu, popeyes. Uh, I do the, I do the darth vader oh, which has got the jalapeno cream cheese? It's basically, it's, basically, it's basically a um cali mist, which is their like uh chicken sandwich.

Tim:

It's got the yeah but it's kind of like that, but it's got uh salami on it and it's got jalapeno cream cheese. It's got all the stuff. Dude, it's good, it's spicy, it's flavorful. But the other one I do is they have like a sticky, like a tie sticky or something like that, a sticky tie or whatever. Yeah, that's the one I do. I have them add it's like pineapple. I have them add peanut butter. It's a teriyaki chicken sandwich. Yeah. Add peanut butter add peanut butter and then add jalapenos to it.

Javier:

I did not know that was a thing.

Chad:

Peanut butter. Yeah, that sounds like it could go hard. It's weird.

Tim:

Peanut butter elevates a lot of things. Agreed Peanut butter on a burger. Chad and I had the first. We had our peanut butter boy Not peanut butter boy, that's over at Big Cat but we had the peanut butter. The Ravi Sankar, yeah, but we had the peanut butter the Ravi Sankar.

Chad:

Yeah, that they did over at Rodeo.

Tim:

Goat. And then, ever since then, I've been craving peanut butter burgers. Now I want to do a peanut butter burger. Dude, big Cat, have you had?

Chad:

Big Cat's peanut butter burger. Yeah, it's almost too much, though I want like a slider.

Tim:

I get a small one. Oh, you can. Yeah, you can get two there's. It's fantastic.

Chad:

So yeah, I either do the Thai stick, like you mentioned, or I'll do the White Widow, which is the bacon ranch.

Tim:

Oh yeah, yeah, bacon chicken ranch, thing.

Chad:

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tim:

All right. So I want to play another clip, and this is from the CEO of Hometown Heroes. There's actually two that I'm going to play and I just love, so I'll have to kind of describe what you're seeing, because not everybody's going to be able to see it, but it was Dan Patrick doing the whole throwing the shit and all that.

Speaker 2:

Does anyone want to try any of this? Anybody want this bag Whoa coming in hot from Dan Patrick right there? This is our Rice Krispie Treats. They have all the ingredients on the back and a COA so you can tell what is in them. Despite what Dan Patrick said, these are 25% off right now on the website in honor of Dan Patrick. Coupon code is Dan Patrick Love you guys.

Tim:

Happy hunting, that's awesome. So there's that one, and then there's one more.

Javier:

On the group chat, whoever you like.

Speaker 2:

Take all of this THC that's been poisoning kids and adults. Here you go, sir. Thank you, thank you, officer, sir. Thank you, thank you, officer. Appreciate all you do. This is the box from dan patrick's office, hand curated. The coupon code is going to be dan's delight d-a-n-s-d-e-l-i-g-h-t. Check this out. We've got our sin of crunch treats. We have the cocoa crisp, the fruity rainbow all three are amazing if you haven't tried them before. We've also got our caramels, which are absolutely incredible if you like caramels, and our live rosin gummies.

Speaker 2:

Day and night discovery packs those are all these products straight from dan patrick's office to you. This box is 99 for all of this. It is the steel of the century. Ingredients on all the packaging, full panel testing, so you know exactly what is in these products. Absolutely amazing. Love you guys. Happy hunting, enjoy, we'll take what a good deal, yeah what a good like.

Chad:

Good on them for taking that as a marketing opportunity. Not only one, because if it does pass, everyone's got to like completely get rid of their their inventory by september, but like also just taking advantage of it and also spouting the good word in the middle of doing it all like what that's a good business yes, that's a really good business.

Tim:

Good business. If I could consume these products, I would support his company 100%.

Javier:

I'm going to buy them right now.

Tim:

Because he seems like a very genuine down-to-earth guy. Yeah, I think it's great.

Chad:

One more thing that I was going to mention and I completely forgot what I was going to say, but I didn't want you to move on before I said it and then I forgot it. So, uh, do you remember what?

Tim:

you were going to say no All right Real quick.

Javier:

on the group chat we were talking about food. Hervey says banana split and the boomstick hot dog and Governor Lazy Legs needs to veto the bill. Absolutely. They should sue him for using their product. Absolutely. They should sue him for using their product. Take his alcohol bribe money. That's right, because he lobbyists that are with the alcohol. You know the alcohols people donate to Dan Patrick.

Chad:

Oh yeah, that's probably the biggest part of it. No, so I do remember what I was going to say, so I did. You know, there was a petition that a lot of the breweries and stuff like that were trying to send in. So I submitted like a little letter or whatever and, uh, should I read the the response?

Chad:

yes uh from from governor greg abbott, because essentially it's all down to him at this point, right? So, dear mr butler, thank you for contacting the office uh of the governor concerning senate bill 3 by senator charles perry relating to the regulation of products derived from hemp, including consumable hemp products and the hemp derived cannabinoids contained in those products. We have shared your correspondence regarding Senate Bill three with our legislative and policy staff, who have been monitoring the bill during the legislative session At this time. Governor Abbott is closely reviewing all bills passed by the legislature man that is a hard word with a cancer tongue Legislature, legislature, that's a hard word with a cancer tongue.

Tim:

Legislature Legislature.

Chad:

That's a difficult one for me to do Legislature and sent to his desk. By Constitution, the governor has until June 22nd to take action on this piece of legislation. So I mean, obviously it's pretty fucking cut and paste, you know yeah still, but you know, yeah, they're reviewing it.

Tim:

They took your they apparently. Yeah, he's seen your letter and they were.

Chad:

They were trying to get like a hundred thousand people and I think they got well over that. Oh yeah, which is awesome.

Tim:

So one of the I mean the one of the videos I saw them just wheeling boxes of letters into his office. That's crazy, um, all right, so I want to talk about uh, we the stuff that we've talked about where I thought there should be a juiced league and now all that's happening.

Chad:

You talked about that shit years ago.

Tim:

Yeah. So that's cool, that's happening and I'm excited about that. But I also want to talk about Banana Ball, Banana League. So are we going to get into the?

Chad:

first one.

Tim:

Yeah, let's get into the first one. So I want to talk about both of them, okay, so the juiced league what do you know about this? Because you sent it to me and showed me a little bit about it.

Chad:

Yeah, so I listened to this like daily tech and news podcast and they were talking about how they briefly touched on it and I thought I was having like a fever dream or something.

Tim:

I was like wait, this is something I've been talking about for years.

Chad:

This is something that I've heard of before, like yeah, apparently they're going to let these athletes get on like steroids or whatever you know performance enhancing drugs and actually compete, as if it was the Olympics type thing. And I was like that sounds eerily familiar. And then I sent it over to you and I was like holy shit, this is real. So years ago for those of you who are listening, watching whatever Tim mentioned I wish there was a juiced league where people could just do whatever they want and then we get to see like the real beasts competing with one another. Right, and that's exactly what it is. I don't know all the sports I'm actually very curious, but there's a lot of money behind it. I think it's this whole venture capitalist thing behind it that they're trying to push. It's almost like ESPN, the Ocho, except for a juice league type situation.

Tim:

All right, so Jesse Magnetson. He's an Olympic swimmer. His transformation now because he's going to be in the juice league is absolutely insane. I wish I had pictures. The physique change alone is crazy. Yeah, let me see. We don't know how much he's on. Let me see if I can find a picture of it.

Chad:

Okay.

Tim:

I don't know how much he's on. Let me see if I find a picture of it. Okay, I don't know how much he's on. Yeah, uh, let me see if I can find it. I don't know what.

Chad:

We don't know what he's on can you imagine if they like, bring up these athletes and, instead of telling you like their, their history or anything like that, they tell you exactly their regiment and what, what's their dosage and like how much their?

Javier:

their fucking stat sheet is like their cycles, right? I mean, this is what true potential in sports should be.

Chad:

I feel like this is kind of what the UFC was going to be at first.

Javier:

Oh, like no rules, like no rules.

Chad:

Right, and then it's not quite that anymore. But when it came in it was like anyone could fight anyone. It was just like a shit show. I feel like this is going to be that where people are going to watch it probably. And it's become, it's going to, it's just going to take off.

Javier:

It's going to be like, uh, there was a show in the 90s like a cartoon called mutant league, kind of like that. It's like they're all like oh, no, but they don't juice, they're just monsters. Yeah, there was an episode about juicing and then one of the guys was like I'm a juicer. Yeah, it was crazy.

Tim:

Never mind, okay, so hang on Fucking ADHD. Yeah, all right, I'm going to show you this. This is crazy, okay? So this is basically Should.

Chad:

I ask Chad GBT about the enhanced league.

Tim:

Yes so this is before and after.

Chad:

Holy fuck that dude is a unit. Holy fuck that dude is a unit.

Tim:

Holy God. Like he was already pretty. He was in shape for a swimmer, but now he looks like a fucking linebacker.

Javier:

He's got wings, he's got fucking wings.

Chad:

Yeah, he does that, motherfucker didn't even have to swim, he just glides through the water.

Tim:

Apparently he's already broken a record and they're saying, well, it doesn't count, because he's whatever it a record and they're saying well, it doesn't count, because he's whatever it fucking counts.

Chad:

What's he called the Enhanced League?

Tim:

Yeah.

Javier:

He should be a part of that. One man, two or three women fighting.

Chad:

What can you tell me about the next league where they can be juiced on drugs and performance enhancing drugs and whatnot? I want to know the sports, some of the top contenders and what it's all about in a short synopsis. Yeah it's called the Enhanced Games. Let's see what ChatGPT has to say about it.

Speaker 4:

What's he having?

Chad:

to think I think I broke it. He's like what?

Tim:

What the fuck are you talking about?

Speaker 4:

The Enhanced Games is a proposed international sporting event where athletes can use performance-enhancing drugs without the restrictions imposed by traditional sports organizations. It aims to push the boundaries of human performance and provide a platform where enhanced athletes can compete openly. The sports involved would likely mirror traditional Olympic events and there's been interest from athletes looking to push the limits of human capabilities. It's still in the conceptual phase, but it's generating a lot of buzz and controversy.

Javier:

I would like to see Olympic athletes do this.

Chad:

He is an Olympic athlete. He's won gold.

Tim:

Yeah, these are ex-Olympians.

Tim:

So Magnusson retired from professional swimming in 2019 at the age of 28, leaving the sport as the world record holder in the 100-meter freestyle for someone wearing a textile suit world aquatics band swimsuits with polyurethane during competition in 2009, setting the time for 47.10 seconds. During his career, he had twice won gold in the 100 meter freestyle at the world championship, while he also picked up a silver and two bronze medals at the olympic games. He announced in february 2024 that he would be coming out of retirement to compete in the enhanced games, where athletes are not only allowed to use peds but also awarded one million dollars if they managed to break a world record at either the 100 meter sprint or 50 meter freestyle. Magnuson prepared to swim in the latter event, but he claims he had to refine his doping program in order to optimize his speed after packing on too much muscle there was an episode of dragon ball z where, uh, one of the characters trunks um, powered up and made him go faster made him bigger and beefier, which power level, wise, was greater than quote perfect cell.

Javier:

Perfect cell was a perfect being by absorbing two androids, which made him the perfect specimen to fight what happens if you absorb two iphones?

Javier:

then you're uh, super, no, I can't say that's racist. Um, but so he absorbs two androids, but trunks going. Super saiyan goes like a little step above which, which is like a Super Super Saiyan, but not Super Saiyan 2. So he overpowered and became so big. Even though he was like stronger power level wise, his big bulging muscles made him slower, so he can fight as much as he want and tire himself out, but all Cell had to do was like duck and dodge and avoid him.

Tim:

He just tired himself out, Tired himself out. So Dragon Ball Z baby.

Javier:

What a story and dodge and avoid him.

Tim:

He just tired himself out. Dragon Ball Z, baby. What a story. So I think like people already like to watch the Olympics, right? I?

Javier:

thought you were going to say Dragon Ball Z, but carry on.

Tim:

People already like to watch the Olympics. This is going to bring in a whole new group of people that want to watch, like Trump supporters. No, I mean maybe, but like I don't want to watch, I don't want to watch people run track. But if we've got someone who's out running usain bolt because they're all jacked up on like meth or something, then yeah, I, yeah, I'm gonna watch that what drug makes a human being faster? Well, I mean they. So they said there's some stuff that makes like yes, oh, heart attack they've got some stuff that makes um.

Tim:

It helps with blood oxygen absorption and things like that.

Javier:

Yeah.

Tim:

And so it was banned. That was one of the drugs that What's-His-Face was on Lance Armstrong. He was on one of those drugs and it became a big deal because it was a cancer drug, but it helps the absorption of oxygen and the bloodstream and all that, yeah, so I'm looking forward to that. The fact that they're going to give $1 million if you manage to break a world record in those two events is freaking cool.

Tim:

But I start thinking of all the different things. Right, like all. Right, um, baseball, you know these. Uh, you, you had. I mean, what was early 2000s?

Javier:

we had people cranking out world records, but they were on the 90s late 90s you had sammy sosa and uh, mark mcguire yeah, they were juiced up, yeah but the thing is like yeah, they were juiced up, but you still is yeah, they were juiced up but you still have to be good.

Tim:

It doesn't make you just because you're on. It doesn't make you where you can. You still have to be good at it.

Javier:

Can I have robot eyes?

Tim:

I could go get jacked up on testosterone and a bunch of steroids and go out there and try to hit a baseball.

Javier:

I'm going to jack up on Mountain Dew.

Tim:

But if I can't hit a baseball, it's not going to do me any good right.

Chad:

Right, right, I don't know.

Tim:

Okay, so I want Juiced League baseball, but I want them to use metal bats.

Javier:

Okay, yeah.

Tim:

And I want to see. They can't have anybody in the stands because you're going to kill people. Oh, yeah, yeah, you can't have anybody in the stands or you have to put a big net around everything, because then cars are going to get hit in the parking lots too. Oh true, yeah, it's. Um, I like the way we're going with that. Now, on the flip side, y'all have heard of the savannah bananas right, yeah, banana ball. So now there's a texas team. Uh, it's the texas tailgaters.

Tim:

They're joining this league oh yeah, I saw that, um, they're picking up a bunch of other there's. So there's other teams that are going to be forming and there's two critics. Right, you've got people who are like this is basically a bastardized version of baseball and it shouldn't be played and all that stuff, and kids aren't going to learn the fundamentals and all that stuff. Shut up, right, so, like, your kid is going to a regular baseball game and watching it for the fundamentals, that's absolutely not happening.

Chad:

Maybe everyone loved the globetrotters. Come on.

Tim:

Yes, exactly what it is exactly what it is, but here's the thing. So they they're talking about how uh, the ceo uh of savannah, uh, savannah bananas has talked about how our guys are. I mean, they're doing double plays and they're pitching curve balls and they're doing their fundamentals. These are collegiate.

Speaker 4:

They can dance like a motherfucker.

Tim:

These are collegiate athletes and stuff like that Dude, they catch balls between their legs, but then they're doing stuff like that too and the rules they've changed stuff like that too. And the rules they've changed like. So did you know that if you catch a home, run out in the like, you're out in the stands, you catch a home run that runner's out, that's fun so they bring in that's fun they bring in, like the, the, the people in the stands.

Tim:

They get to play, you know, they get to be a part of it. Um, when you step up the batter box, you can't step out like.

Javier:

You're there now, like like you can't call time and yeah, get out the box.

Tim:

Yeah and so they made it where it goes. It goes a little bit faster and there's all these different little rules and things. They changed up every game is two hours.

Javier:

Yep, every game is two hours because, like, how long we were at the ball game? How?

Chad:

long. Oh yeah, you can have an hour and a half game. You have a three hour game.

Tim:

Yeah, it's all over the place, so every game is two hours.

Chad:

So it's not inning-based?

Tim:

No, I mean it. I don't know. I don't know that for a fact, I guess maybe they blow the whistle once two hours.

Javier:

All right, two hours.

Tim:

But they make it two hours and these guys are getting paid, they're going around traveling and all that stuff. And what's really cool about? About? Uh, so jesse cole, he will take the time after at the end of the game and sign autographs and he's like, he's like the post malone of baseball. Uh, security wants everybody out and they're telling people to leave and he's like no, I'm overriding that, don't leave, you, don't have to go, I will stand here and I will sign and I'll meet every single person. That's cool, um, but what he's done now? Because baseball, they say baseball has been kind of a. The numbers have been dwindling over the past several years. Attendance is down and all this stuff, but yet they are selling out. I mean, they sold out. I think it was like the Angels ballpark. Wow, I mean completely 80-something thousand people.

Speaker 4:

That's crazy.

Tim:

To come watch them, and so they're adding more teams, and so now Texas has one of the tailgaters I don't know where they're based out of.

Javier:

I think they play in a couple of different spots here in Texas.

Tim:

Yeah right.

Chad:

And I actually saw that and I was trying to find tickets and they are not even here. That often it's like they're on the road yeah, they're on.

Tim:

Yeah, they're on the road, but they will be here.

Chad:

I think it was like in the fall or something like, or late summer yeah, um, but the whole thing is, it's like it's.

Javier:

He said, we've got to do something, or you know, baseball will die yeah, it almost died in the 90s during the strike it almost killed baseball yeah, and so this has revived that and kids are getting.

Tim:

He's like I've had parents come up to me and say, because of your game, my son now has taken an interest, or my daughter has taken an interest in baseball or softball.

Javier:

My son doesn't do meth anymore.

Tim:

And they want to learn the game. And all these players a lot of them have social media accounts where they're doing. They're coaches too. They're coaching kids on how to do different techniques and things like that. It's such a cool concept that's happening now and I want more sports like that. It's not quite as showman-like not the XFL You've got the XFL a little bit different rules, but it's exciting. It's fun to watch. I want NFL Blitz. Oh, that would be awesome.

Javier:

NFL Blitz was like 90s and 80s football. That's exactly what it was just be juiced football, yeah.

Tim:

I want we're back on the juice. I want juiced football. I want juiced sports.

Chad:

I want a whole separate sporting league where it's all juiced well, like I don't know, back to your point, basketball had Jordan that really kind of brought basketball after Magic Johnson and the whole your dude. Larry.

Chad:

Bird, then it was Jordan, and then Globetrotters and then LeBron. It's kind of had this consistent pull you back in. Somehow there's some kind of entertainment factor right With football. You've got the Super Bowl, which is the largest event of the year every year, and then you also have these huge backings of these teams and stuff like that. But then, to your point, you've got the XFL and they had the Bikini League or whatever it was oh, you're right Laundry League Laundry.

Chad:

League. So you've got these things that kind of pull you in, but keep you football focused, just like those things keep you basketball focused, and this keeps you baseball focused because there hadn't been shit right since the fucking like um when we were in high school or middle school, when it was the the uh, what was it? Mark um, shit that the duel. The guys were trying to see who could hit the most home runs that season mark, figueroa and sammy, so yeah so like baseball has been fun since then, honestly I mean obviously our world series, the rangers a couple years ago.

Chad:

But like, when's the last time you're like man?

Javier:

I can't wait to watch baseball um, it's always whenever there's like records.

Tim:

Well, you talk, to you talk to lance and it's like I why I feel like that every day yeah right I can't wait to watch me.

Tim:

You have baseball people you have your diehard baseball fans and I like to go watch a game and I like to I, I enjoy it, um, and I, if it's on you, if it's on tv, if we're out and it's, you know, on a screen at a bar or whatever, yeah, I'm gonna be into it. Um, but at the end of the day, like I'm not screaming, like, oh my gosh, baseball's. But now I want to, man, if I could get tickets, go to savannah. You know savannah bananas, dude, I want to go I feel it's like that with golf.

Javier:

I think that people don't understand that. You may see golf as boring on TV, but if you go to an event and you experience everything that's happening there, then you will kind of appreciate it a lot more, especially if you're on one of the course hole, the best hole in the field, because that's where everyone gathers and of course everyone's quiet interrupts in in applause and cheer, I would love to go to like um, I mean the colonial would be cool during um it's cool.

Chad:

Whatever, it's probably the last year I'll go yeah this year, but it was fun.

Tim:

It's always fun um but like I would like to go to like a pro-am, like see one of the pro-am tours, like celebrity yeah, like one celebrity. Yeah, I think that'd be fun, Something along those lines. But all right, I want to go through these sports real quick, it is just thick, oh sorry.

Javier:

Okay, go ahead.

Tim:

We've got to come up with a way to make the sport better.

Javier:

Any sport.

Tim:

We're going to go through the lines. So I want to start with football, okay. So I said I want nfl blitz, I want, uh, I want the crazy. You know, after the play's over you can still go tackle somebody, um, but I want it to be real fast paced, like I love watching the red zone oh, yeah, yeah, yeah like.

Tim:

So my thought is you shrink the field down, you make it smaller. All right, you can't. So if you make it smaller, you can't do the. You're still going to do your punt returns, but you can't punt.

Javier:

You've got to Throw it.

Tim:

But it's not the quarterback that throws it, it's got to be the kicker.

Javier:

That's so dumb, yeah, so you're still keeping.

Chad:

It's not dumb, it's your idea, it's great.

Tim:

You're still keeping traditional people.

Chad:

Traditional by having to kick or throw.

Tim:

Got it Well no, but I mean Make them blind, only blinds, kickers. I'm not saying it's the actual kicker. I'm just saying like Can you mute this real quick? No, no.

Javier:

There you go. No, no, I got an idea.

Tim:

No no, no so no, my thought is like you have like a kicker, right, but it's not the quarterback who is amazing at. You know all the throws and passes, but you have somebody who's trained to just they fucking just make bombs, right. Yeah, all right. So you have that. You got all your same positions for the most part, but there is no out of bounds like it's almost like like, if you take like the aspect of like arena, uh, arena, like soccer or okay yeah, right, we're. So. Yeah, there's arena football.

Chad:

It's like boxed in.

Tim:

Yeah right, so it's boxed in smaller um yep, so you take you take a, you take kind of like arena football, but you shrink it down, you know. So, instead of 100 yards, maybe we're doing, maybe we're talking like 60 yards- or 50 yards or whatever.

Tim:

Um, and it's just fast, it's just fast, it's just that's all. It is just fast, right? Um, the only time that like outs are you know if you go out it's not out of bounds, but like if the ball hits the ground and it's not caught or whatever, you know it stops clock, things like that I think that would make for me it'd be more exciting to watch it, because the thing that drives me nuts and everybody this is what a lot of people love about football is that, like, it's that endurance of that just trying to get that one yard, trying to get you know yeah, right it's that push, but it's too slow for me it's too slow.

Tim:

It's that stop and start. Stop and start yeah I wanted this to keep going. So if I put it on red red zone, I can sit there and watch like multiple games and it's all the action and that's what I like. All right. So football how are you? How would you fix football? Make it better?

Chad:

um, I, you know, I think the juice thing, like you know, blitz go back on like the blitz would be the best if you could make like blitz real life.

Chad:

That would be the best. It's not. It's not realistic. So let me go to the next thought. My next thought is I've not ever really watched much of rugby, although I think it's interesting that you've got these super jacked guys without a whole lot of pads that are still extremely physical and doing something very similar to football, right, and so I think that if you find this like uh, it's like mixing rugby with yeah you find this middle ground where, like, maybe people wear less padding but it's still physical and maybe you kind of keep some of those rugby rules.

Chad:

No, helmets. Like where you just, or maybe the old school, like.

Javier:

Old padded helmets. Yeah, just a padded helmet Like something that keeps you safe-ish.

Chad:

But like also like it's almost like these days people have big trucks. It's like big trucks because they're safe. I'm like, well, now everyone needs big trucks because your truck can run over any little car. You know, yeah, if you're in a ton of pads, you're gonna go as hard as you can and like hurt somebody, but if you're not in all pads you're gonna go crazy. But probably be a little bit safer and how you do it like rugby, those guys aren't like concussed all the time it's more like bare knuckle boxing, safer than actual boxing.

Javier:

Is it really? It is?

Chad:

interesting? Yeah, because you're. You're worried about your own hand, right, not?

Javier:

only that, but it's like the gloves are heavy. The gloves are heavy and so like people have died and you know they'll get punch drunk with using gloves, but instead of like getting your hands wrapped and fighting, that's, that's the best way, because you get one good hit.

Chad:

That's it, you're done yeah, on the ground, and then you can also break your own hand, so, so, like you got to be mindful, it's taped up.

Javier:

It's taped Like bare-knuckle boxing which by the way. Bare-knuckle fighting is going to be here at Dickies this month, I think.

Tim:

Really Like a pay-per-view event.

Javier:

Have you ever watched the BFC?

Tim:

Uh-huh.

Javier:

Yeah, I enjoy it.

Tim:

Jessie can't watch it tv, or if I catch on youtube or whatever she's like I know it's entertaining as fuck I'm like I love I mean, that's what I liked about ufc very limited pads on your hands and you're beating the shit out of each other. It's great. So blitz football rugby mix football, rugby bits, okay, yeah.

Javier:

So how you fix an nfl? Uh, overtime rules instead of, like, scoring on each one? Have you seen those videos of those people laying down and then getting up and then charging at each other trying to like one's trying to tackle the guy with the ball? You ever seen this you never seen that red rover.

Chad:

What are you talking about?

Javier:

pretty much, yeah, like they're like lying, like head to head, yeah, and they'll blow the whistle, one will have the ball and they'll get up quickly and try to knock the other guy over and go past them oh so it's like a one-on-one, yeah, like a one-on-one for overtime, for overtime, kind of like a kind of like a hockey face-off.

Tim:

Yeah, that's my first.

Javier:

Yeah, okay, so yeah you each team gets two tries or three tries. I guess, if you're gonna be like even stuff like that, or soccer.

Tim:

Soccer has that too soccer has penalties so you do one one v one, or do you like uh, one v one, one v one, but like you have three players for overtime and whoever has the highest amount of players.

Javier:

That makes it through wins okay. It makes it like violent and entertaining yeah, I like that.

Chad:

So you keep the football, you just change that little bit.

Javier:

Yeah, I like that and you have the players like kind of like in these videos, like players are surrounded surrounding these guys. Wow, and they'll, like you know yeah, get up and they get the whistle blows.

Chad:

Get up and they run towards each other dude, that'd be entertaining and I almost feel like football players would like that because it's, you know, obviously it's a lot of. It's a team sport, but this gives you the opportunity to be the fucking man. Yeah, you know, what I mean. And so, like a lot of players would love that shit, that's a cool idea. Like, uh, they have a thing for, they have a thing in.

Javier:

Like a lot of players would love that shit, that's a cool idea Like uh, they have a thing for, they have a thing in like a like peewee football, like the parents and their kids will do it but they'll usually take the mom.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, the mom.

Javier:

And there are some the kids will like knock that shit out of their mom. And I'm like bro, that's your mom.

Tim:

Stop and then sometimes they run to their mom like it's a brick wall. She's like it's some good shit. Yeah, all right. So, uh, basketball.

Javier:

I have a few ideas um you I swear to christ if you say trampolines on the floor that was my first thought. No, no, no, no, no, they already have that, they already have that.

Tim:

Oh so, like you, you take away the um, you take away the, basically the, you make it more physical. But you take away the. Basically, you make it more physical, where you can actually like, instead of you flop on the ground. Okay, get back up. That's not going to do you any good If I slam it like I shoulder check you. I shoulder check you, that's just how.

Javier:

It's a street ball. It's a street ball, yeah, yeah.

Tim:

You basically like it's street rules.

Javier:

NBA street. It's like blitz with NFL.

Tim:

Yeah street it's like blitz with nfl, yeah, yeah, you just make it. You make it more. You, you add that physicality to it. Um, you still continue. Your your traditional like traveling, things like that goaltending uh, goaltending I don't know. I think if you can get a good, if, if you can, if you can clown on somebody really well and they, you know they shoot and you're able to snatch it up off the I think that's fine right. But you still keep some of your other stuff, but you just make it more physical. That's my thought. Baseball or basketball is pretty perfect as it is, in my opinion.

Chad:

I kind of agree with you. I feel like if you take away some of the flopping, you make it a little bit more physical, like the it's like I'm'm gonna give you a reason to flop you take away some of the penalties and the reasons that that shit's happening yeah and make it like more fun. Like honestly, I feel like that really started to happen in like the late 90s, early 2000s, right. So like early basketball, it was a lot more physical I think so.

Javier:

Late 80s, early 90s basketball, the detroit Bad Boys like the Pistons. Yeah, that squad, like they were physical and they would get into fist fights and these people would have like one game, suspensions, like fighting, and you saw Michael Jordan do it, michael. Jordan getting fights with John Sparks and what's his name? From Indiana.

Tim:

You throw the aspect of hockey, reggie Miller.

Javier:

Reggie Miller yeah.

Tim:

You throw a little bit of that hockey fight. Sure, it's not a suspension, you're going to have to go sit out, you're done for five minutes. You get five for fighting, like hockey or whatever.

Chad:

Dude, that'd be kind of cool. They get power plays and shit. Yeah, that'd be wild.

Tim:

That'd be pretty cool.

Chad:

I think something like that I would take the flopping out right right, because I don't, or would it, it would, yeah, yeah because then you'd have well, you have draymond fighting like every night.

Javier:

Yeah, he'd be fucking knocking people out.

Chad:

Imagine zion. Oh, I mean right, because you got some of these guys are just fucking massive, yeah, yeah just, I'm with you on that, me too. That's my, that's my thing, that's all right, cool and also trampolines, go on and then for baseball how do you make?

Tim:

how do you make? I think savannah bananas has made it that.

Chad:

That's exactly how I I mean, I really, yes, it's fun, but it's almost like a. It's an entertainment thing, right, like which all sports is, I guess, but like that becomes more of like right, so take some of the gimmick out of it.

Tim:

Right, right. But like I love the idea that if a fan catches the ball, then you're out yeah, I've never heard that.

Chad:

That's genius that is.

Tim:

That is a great. You know things like that I. I do like that baseball has added the pitch timing or timer.

Javier:

That's on purpose, because they realize people get bored with three-hour games. Oh yeah.

Tim:

Yeah, so I like that. I like that aspect. I like not being able to step out of the batter's box Once you're in. You're in, You're locked in, you just got to go. I don't know if, maybe making it again more physical.

Javier:

I mean with baseball you can't, because you're talking studs up, You're talking like interference. I'm not talking about things like that.

Tim:

But I'm talking like you come running at the mound and I can shoulder check you and you know whatever. Did you see the video of the guy where he was bouncing? Did you see that he was jumping on the plate and the team I can't remember what team it was, which teams were playing, but he walked up and tagged them out because he came off the plate.

Chad:

I think that they should bring in the outfield a little bit. I think that we don't get enough home runs.

Tim:

I honestly think that the game has gotten a little. I don't. I don't know, I don't know what.

Javier:

The new bat, maybe the new bat that's gonna make it to where more home runs are going to be scored, agreed, good point, but I feel like you know you don't.

Chad:

I mean, you definitely see home runs, but like when it happens it is not a me home run, you home run, me home run. It's like we got a home run or we got a grand slam and it's like, okay, you won you know what I mean. Like it's not as competitive as I thought it was, and you know earlier sure um, but I don't know.

Chad:

Like also, I don't know any. I know a lot of the baseball players, but none of them are like as important as the football players. You know, like basketball players, everyone knows lebron, I mean, yeah, everyone knows, like juan soto and things like that.

Chad:

But like or shohei showtime, he's the one right like he's the one in baseball right now, but usually you have more than that. It's just like we got one guy and like a lot of like great players, but they don't have a lot of notoriety and I don't understand why. It's like no one really talks about baseball like they like position players like how great they can like yeah, it's. It's like if you hit great, Otherwise fuck off Like pitchers, get some you know, like obviously they're important but no one really gives a shit.

Tim:

Yeah, yeah, no one's, no one's caring about your shortstop.

Chad:

No.

Tim:

Except for whatever. What?

Chad:

Josh Hamilton when.

Tim:

Josh Hamilton was. You know, right, yeah.

Chad:

And like the baseball cards, like cards really started with baseball cards like your, your old timey baseball cards are still worth a lot of money, but like you get a good pool now, unless again it's like shohei otani or something like that, or mike trout. Otherwise you're like oh well. Well, this is great. We've got a one-on-one, one of one, juan soto on card auto. It's fucking awesome and it's you know, not this like multi-thousand dollar card, like I think that not like a tom brady downtown car right exactly like a tom brady downtown card not signed, not a one of one.

Chad:

There's plenty of them out there and we sold it for twenty five hundred dollars. That's crazy that we were able to sell it for that, and this one's like you're talking about bringing in the outfield.

Tim:

I think you gotta. So you'd have to take like an average right, like okay, so how many, how many? How many home runs every year, right? Yeah and then what's the average distance? Yeah, these balls are going right, yeah, and then you've got to bring you just you, bring it in just enough yeah, I'm talking 10, 15 feet, just enough because there's so many that are on the edge.

Tim:

I'm just saying like, pump those numbers up a little bit make it a little bit more entertaining yeah, I mean I do like like a good in the park home run Inside the park home run.

Javier:

Those are pretty kind of that's errors.

Tim:

So no, but here's what you do, Like you have some.

Javier:

You grease up the ball. You grease up the ball.

Tim:

You grease up the ball. No, you have some ballparks that have been brought in right, yeah, and you parks that have been brought in right. Yeah, you have some ballparks that are a little bit bigger well, and you have a mix and so it's like, because it's like a, like a nascar, you have different, uh different banks and stuff like that it's like some, some, some tracks are a little bit faster, a little bit hotter, but that's how it is now in baseball, like they're not all the same.

Chad:

It's not like there's a regulation right?

Tim:

no, it's not all the same, but I'm talking like but you, you, you maybe drastically different.

Chad:

Yeah, Maybe like maybe you have like this one's tucked in.

Tim:

Maybe this one's a lot wider.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Tim:

Right, you keep the same distance, but like you, just you bring out your, your sides.

Javier:

Well it's, it's difficult because you know the new ballpark is like number specific with, like the Rangers history.

Speaker 4:

Yeah.

Javier:

So like the yardage will coincide with like a player's former number or like how many home runs they made in their career, and they'll have that number added to like how deep the outfield will go. So those variables are different. It's kind of the same with soccer the pitches are never the same size. The pitch at old trafford is smaller than the pitch at wembley. Wembley stadium's pitch is like way bigger than a normal pitch. You're right, the regulation isn't there for the sizes. It can't be a drastic size. You can't have almost a quarter length longer on a ballpark's outfield than a different one, because that's an advantage to the home team, because now you're not going to see a lot of home runs. That's kind of just.

Chad:

And maybe they expand the foul ball line too, the foul line.

Javier:

You mean like bring it in. That's what I'm saying.

Tim:

You bring it in a little bit and you make it wider, so you're going to get more home runs you're gonna have a mix, then you get. You get your mix of like out of the park, basically right or off the field, and then you're in the park home runs yeah I got you.

Javier:

You know what I think would make baseball better if they brought back uh they're allowed to hit each other with the bats. Yes, if they brought back. You know how the old ballpark had that field where if a home run was hit, people can run after the ball oh, yeah, I think they need to bring that yeah zone or whatever, yeah, yeah or, like you know, have more, like, have little pools like they do in frisco, oh you know they've got that at the um the diamondback stadium.

Javier:

They've got the pool, the swimming pool at the swimming pool.

Chad:

They've got the swimming pool Fucking outrageously expensive, by the way.

Javier:

Really Like $1,000 tickets.

Tim:

Oh fuck, Crazy yeah For Arizona.

Chad:

To just go sit and yeah and you're in the outfield. You're just past the outfield and you're in a pool watching the game from the pool. It's legit, but it's like fucking expensive. That's crazy.

Tim:

Even on like a, they're expensive. Yeah, I don't like that.

Javier:

You know how to make sports better.

Tim:

You make the tickets cheaper. Again I thought titties.

Chad:

And titties, hmm, hmm, yeah, more titties. That's everything, though. Everything's just fucking expensive.

Javier:

Everything should have more titties.

Tim:

All right, boys, that's all I got. Okay, it's a fun discussion.

Chad:

I had a thing of the up hockey, because it's already perfect, hockey's already perfect. They beat the shitty out of each other.

Tim:

Um, they already have the you know, they do the they have. Uh, you know the one, one v one face offs I mean shootouts.

Chad:

Yeah, it's in soccer. You take out flops. Flops is a yellow card flops are already.

Javier:

They are already being carded really yeah, they are no way going back and using var to check a foul and they will check if it's uh flop and they will give them a yellow card.

Tim:

Okay, hell, yeah, I love that. Never mind, we're good. One other thing you have multiple leagues of each sport and if your team doesn't do good, they have to Relegation. Yes, every sport should have relegation.

Chad:

Yes, agree with that. I mean you should have these teams that are competing not just a money franchise, like the fucking cowboys but like yes, how can the most losing team have the most money? In the world backed by the. You know what I'm.

Tim:

It's crazy if you had uh regularly or what relegation with with like for the cowboys, for example.

Javier:

It's not no well, they technically wouldn't, because you're, if you're talking relegation, you're looking at the last three teams. The worst three teams in the league would get relegated down to like arena league.

Tim:

Have the Cowboys ever been one of the worst three?

Javier:

It has been a long time.

Tim:

I'm just saying at some point they would have gotten dropped down, right yeah but you're talking about that as if that is the entirety of the league.

Chad:

You've got to split the NFL up into two or three leagues at that point and then have the relegation, and then you've got your top performer, your top 12 or whatever it is, your middle 12 and your bottom 12.

Javier:

I think there's like 25 Premier League teams.

Chad:

I mean, I think that would be awesome and honestly I don't know why. Maybe I'm just a fucking idiot but like I don't know why we break it up Into like sections, like you know, the.

Javier:

NFC.

Chad:

East West? Like, why don't we just do like a tier ranked system From top to bottom? Like, if you, oh, we're number one in our league, well, we're against some shitty teams. You know what I mean? You do it with baseball, where you get your Farm teams right.

Tim:

Oh, we're number one in our league. Well, we're against some shitty teams. You know what I mean. Whatever you do it with baseball, where you get your farm teams right, and if let's just say the Rangers do shitty, they get dropped down to AAA ball or whatever and they bring up their farm team.

Javier:

So the way relegation would be good for every sport. Well, because the main thing with relegation in soccer they share a split of revenue. I think it's like $3 billion between every team. The whole point of staying in the Premier League is to get enough money to be able to buy players or pay for their transfers, because transfers are paid to this, to the team that owns the player. Like if, like manchester united, we just got matthias cuña from the wolves, they had to pay 67 million dollars in a transfer fee and still pay him a salary. Bruno fernandez, their captain, was getting offers from uh saudi league, a transfer fee of 100 million dollars and getting paid 100 100 a million dollars a week and tax-free.

Javier:

So it's like it's a more uh incentive money-based league yeah, which is what, like you were saying, right, the cowboys are the the most valuable team in the world. It makes no sense for us, as fans, to continue supporting a bad product when we're not getting anything in return agreed because all they're getting is just more money in their pocket, and we're like still cheering for a team that's mediocre at best.

Tim:

Right, agreed, yep, all right. So that's all I got.

Javier:

You have something I do. What were you going to do Nothing.

Chad:

Were you about to finish? No, I was going to ask him to mute it real quick. Oh, you want me to mute it?

Tim:

Okay, we got to mute it real quick.

Javier:

Hang on, hang on continue okay um, I did see something on uh tiktok and it kind of went viral for a couple days. How men would like to die and the way people like you know the way? Have you ever had the dream or a thought like when you're? It's like a last stand death.

Tim:

You know what I mean yeah, like, yeah, where it's like you versus like a hundred people. I see myself on top of a hill and I'm the only person between you know them.

Javier:

And justice, or whatever, or, like your family's like running away and you tell them to run and you're you're holding the horde back yeah like people are like, yeah, last stand death. That's how I want to go.

Tim:

No, I mean, I said it the other day if I ever go to outer space, just know I'm probably gonna just let myself float off have you watched mickey 17?

Javier:

no watch mickey 17 on hulu. Okay with that, robert pattinson it's really good. I think last stand deaths are where it's at how I would want to go. You ever thought about that?

Tim:

well, he's not going to die. We've already discussed that.

Chad:

I've been thinking about this a lot recently no, I've not thought about a last day in death, like are you asking?

Javier:

like how I would want to go oh, I mean like the whole thing was like how women want to die oh, peaceful, surrounded by my family, and then it's like men no, I want to be uh it'll show like a clip of john snow I want to be, you know, by himself and the other fucking nude, covered in somebody else's blood.

Tim:

Like I came into this world. I mean screaming and you know.

Chad:

I don't know. Something outrageous, like if I had to pick a way to go. It's not going to be like I mean, I'm peaceful and sleep would be fantastic, but like don't you want to?

Tim:

like you want one of those? Like like, this was like that.

Chad:

It was like wow, that's like I want to go jump off a mountain with a wingsuit and no parachute into a volcano fuck. Yes, because that's a quick way to go.

Javier:

No, it's not, not a lava. Yeah, what's that? No, what's that effect? The where you can touch something very hot and roll it off your hand and, uh, like the same thing with, like, liquid nitrogen. Like, if you scoop it up it doesn't hurt you, but if you like, keep it in there, then it'll start.

Tim:

Oh, it's an effect. Okay, it's an effect. Well, okay, well, okay. I, if that's going to be the case, I want to bring back on all tombstones. It has how the person died, like they used to in the old days, like this person died of consumption a glass jar broke in his ass a whole jar squatter.

Javier:

Um, I was thinking about one type of death. Uh, I saw the uh titan submersible documentary on hulu, or is it hulu? And the way they described it they're like you know what the way they died is is actually a perfect death, because it happens so fast that you don't realize it's happening and it happens like real quick.

Tim:

Yeah.

Javier:

Which is a documentary that everyone should watch.

Tim:

It's just about rich people going. Yep, yeah, okay.

Javier:

Flying too close to the sun. Yeah, all right.

Chad:

Well, I think that wraps it up. Yeah, boys, yeah, yeah With that morbid ending. Yeah, with that morbid ending. We should have kicked it off with that. Yeah, no kidding, if you don't already do so, please make sure you follow us on all things social media. At the Funky Panther, you can call text, leave us a voicemail 817-677-0408. You can find all of this at thefunkypanthercom. Stay good everybody. I'm Chad, I'm Javier, I'm Tim and we are the Monkey Panther. So glad you didn't say disappointed, you, piece of shit.

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