The Funky Panther

200 F*ckin' Episodes Later: CPAPs, Crickets, and Cream of the Cock

• Chad, Tim, Javier • Episode 200

Share episode

Send us a text

This ain’t your grandma’s podcast recap. After five long-ass years and 200 episodes of pure chaotic energy, The Funky Panther boys are still talkin’ shit, takin’ names, and accidentally jacking off crickets (don’t ask). In this “farewell-but-not-really” dumpster fire of nostalgia, we look back at the beer-soaked beginnings, roast our old intros, and get weirdly emotional over CPAP machines and robot vacuums. Chad announces he’s ditching the mic for married life and adulting — RIP to his balls. Also featuring: edible-fueled honeymoons, dick jokes during serious announcements, and more clickbait than a Buzzfeed intern on meth. 

If you’ve ever wanted to hear grown men cry into microphones while debating the proper term for robot slurs, this one’s for you. 

Fake ad

CALL OR TEXT OUR HOTLINE AND LEAVE US A MESSAGE! 817-677-0408

Fort Worth Magazine
Best of 2022 - Radio Personality/Podcast (Reader's Pick)

Show Links
The Funky Panther
Merch
YouTube

Chad:

No, I don't think it's that bad. Um, we got a robot vacuum.

Sound drop:

So excuse me?

Chad:

Robot vacuum.

Tim:

Sorry. A clinker. Thank you. Yeah, we call them clankers now.

First Episode Chad:

Oh, I mean, we gotta we gotta kick off the fucking music, I guess, so it's we I mean we're down to 50.

Tim:

Might as well just jump in right with it, huh?

First Episode Chad:

Get out of here. We gotta start the show. We gotta start the show. I'm not doing the intro again. We already did it. No, no, no, we already did it. Oh hello everyone, and welcome to the Funky Panther. Coming in from Fort Worth, Texas, we have got the best fucking show for you here on episode 200.

Speaker 8:

You know, I said I couldn't hear myself, it's because the mic wasn't here.

First Episode Chad:

Okay, alright. We made it, boys.

Chad:

We did 235 episodes. Holy shit, what a deal.

Speaker 8:

Man, five years. Some people do 400 in like a week. We're not dope guys though. I mean, I can't do this for a living. Anywho! Yeah, congrats on 200, boys! 200. Cheers up, cheers up.

First Episode Chad:

Hell yeah. What a day.

Speaker 8:

What a day outside of the pocket.

First Episode Chad:

Ah, so sit back, relax, enjoy, and let's get into it. I'm Chad. I'm Javier.

Tim:

And I'm Timothy.

Speaker 8:

And we are the Funky Panther! Long way long time coming. 200. It's been five years, five and a half years. We would have hit this number sooner, but life happens. Obviously, you know, we've been gone for about a month and three quarters. Um, but life happens. We were all busy during the summer. Fucking hail season happened and, you know, it just kept me fucking like I was on the goddamn I don't know what that is.

Tim:

What is that?

Speaker 8:

That's jerking off a cricket. Jack off cricket now, boy. That's my new job. I don't work on dings anymore.

Chad:

Bro, if it pays, it pays. I don't care. Let's go.

Speaker 8:

Listen, look, I know the videos I've been posting of me pushing dents may fool you. I pray to Christ my mom's not listening. Because she follows our page. Um yep, jacking off crickets, you know, they're they're a dying population, so someone's got to do it. Someone's gotta do the dirty work.

Tim:

Are they gonna are they really a dying?

Speaker 8:

No, actually, that's one thing we need less of. The the plague was crickets, wouldn't it? Cicadas and speaking of which, if you were over at the cicada here tonight, uh visit or here at Fort Worth had their uh uh monthly uh shindig. So um it should have already been over by now, but if you were there, cheers to you. Cicada's a great place, check it out. I'm on Adderall now, so you've been on Adderall. No, no, I've been on Adderall for a month.

First Episode Chad:

Okay. You were on it before.

Speaker 8:

Antidepressants.

First Episode Chad:

I know, I know there's a difference. You have been on Adderall in the past.

Speaker 8:

Yes, okay.

Chad:

I'm not crazy. Yeah, okay.

Sound drop:

Yeah.

Chad:

You made it sound like I'm finally on it. Look at here, guys! I'm finally focused. Locust, thank you, Jamie.

Speaker 8:

Oh, hey, Dustin. Hey, how you doing, buddy? Uh saw your first official episode on Fort Worth as fuck was on. Uh gotta check that out, give it a listen. I'm sorry, I'm talking too much. I'm so sorry. Okay.

Tim:

Okay, so before we get started, I just wanted to I want us to go down memory lane just for a second. I hope it's a bunch of porn noises. Just for a second, and I want to play this. Let's see if he'll do it.

First Episode Chad:

Oh my god, hello everyone, and welcome to the podcast. This is the first or fourth really, but we're gonna try this again. We've got here, right?

Chad:

What a cluster.

First Episode Chad:

So Tim, go ahead and get uh kick us off. What are we gonna be talking about today?

Tim:

This was uh that was the beginning of this was before we knew COVID was gonna be a thing. Right. This was uh us uh on our fourth or fifth take, right?

First Episode Chad:

So uh yeah, two months before COVID, right? January or February or something like that.

Tim:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then utilizing um to eat. Uh what's his face? So we recorded through Zeus's Wait, hold on.

Speaker 8:

Can you await it like five seconds? Because I'm like, whatever. I love listening to this episode because of how what hey Zeus.

Tim:

Javier, where is like if you're going out to eat on a Friday night, where are you going back the clitters?

Javier:

Oh man.

Tim:

Oh man, bad that audio was. That was terrible. We recorded it on um we recorded it on Zeus's uh PA, basically, and then piped it into my phone and recorded it into Garage Band. Wow. Yeah.

First Episode Chad:

Wild. It is wild. It's crazy. We we you know, we've had like just uh, you know, thinking back about the past 200 episodes, we've got a lot of recurring guests that have been absolutely phenomenal just because that means we've become friendly with some of the coolest fucking people that we've ever met. And they said yes, we'll come back. You know what I mean?

Speaker 8:

Like dude, we at the beginning we had people wanting to come on, asking to come back.

Tim:

Yeah, I mean just uh episode what, one, two I mean that never stopped. Third episode emails.

Speaker 8:

Did you see the last one? Yeah, did you like a dog sitter? I mean, yeah, I mean that sounds pretty cool.

Tim:

Yes. Do I take a dog sitter to come on? Absolutely. The third one was the hype man's journey. So that was like our first Oh, that was our was that Rafael, right?

Speaker 8:

That was our first uh shout out to uh Mr. Huerta over there at 817 Vintage Hype. He was our first guest, yeah. He's exploded among like the pantheon of of uh thrift here in Fort Worth.

Tim:

Yeah. Yeah, okay. So I just want I just wanted since we were starting the show, I was like, we heard what we kind of do with our intro now. I was like, we should we should play the original, that first intro. And uh God, I don't miss it.

First Episode Chad:

I mean, that was funky. That was that was fun, that was a good time. I we drank so much. We used to drink pretty heavy. This is the first time I've had a beer on the show in a long time, just because we're we're old and it's week nights. Like I don't want to do that. I'm gonna wake up early tomorrow.

Speaker 8:

Well, no, actually, I had not anymore. You not you, but we'll get into that.

Tim:

Well, yeah, because you jack off a cricket, so you don't have to get up early.

Speaker 8:

You know what? They wake me up, they wake me up, they wake you up.

First Episode Chad:

Daddy, it's time. But 3435 seemed like forever ago. It really did. You know what I mean? Like we were we were, well, I guess 33 to 35, something like that when we started this thing. And now we're knocking on 40, and like life's different.

Speaker 8:

It is.

First Episode Chad:

Did you see, did you listen how lively and happy I sound? The beginning of that episode. What the fuck happened?

Tim:

In this episode, we're gonna we're gonna deep dive into it and figure out which episode Chad just lost on. When did this humanity stop?

Speaker 8:

He's like, you know what? Nuke comes, you know what COVID can take me. Just go to this fucking team.

First Episode Chad:

I'm I'm asking for it at this point. No.

Speaker 8:

We've been from here to Austin recording. Um we've been invited to record it. Gustos, Down and Out, Tulips, Tulips, South by Southwest. Um San Antonio. We went down to San Antonio recorded. San Antonio recorded. Um a bunch of places we've gone that honestly, if you would have told me five years ago, even before we even did this, like this would be a thing. I didn't think it would be.

Tim:

We inspired a podcast.

Speaker 8:

Well, to be frank, y'all did.

Tim:

I was just No no no no no. We inspired a podcast to form after us, and that was uh well, it wasn't Tales from the Fort then, it was the whatever what was the show originally? I can't remember the name. Tuesday does it. Tuesday, Does Day, yeah. And then uh Tales from the Fort and uh Rest in peace, George Hanson. Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Shout out to you, big dog, up in the down in the hell escape you.

First Episode Chad:

Jared isn't dead, just so y'all know. Oh. And he's just not around anymore. He's just there. He's Gambino side. He's wrapped up in it.

Speaker 8:

Basically, don't make noise, just so you know.

Chad:

Just so you know. Yeah, so uh Jared's on.

Tim:

Look at that, look at that.

Chad:

It is still here. He's got a family now, guys.

First Episode Chad:

He's got a family. He's got a full-ass family. Shout out to everybody in the chat.

Speaker 8:

14 people on live right now. Thank you so much. Oh, by the way, if you would like to call, we will break in anytime. The number's 817-677-0407. Make sure you guys that's it. 817-677-0408.

Tim:

I gotta make sure we got voice uh even open.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, shout out to to Vanya, who's been around since early, early days, always sporting local.

Speaker 8:

She was remembered the first time we met her was uh when we did the recording at Tulips. Yeah, and she brought us those crumble cookies.

First Episode Chad:

Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So sweet. Even the first time eating you. Sam from the failed podcast, always G. Huh?

Speaker 8:

Never mind.

First Episode Chad:

What?

Speaker 8:

You said first time eating you?

First Episode Chad:

Meeting you. Oh. I think you're talking about the cookies. Actually, it might have been the first time I had Crumble. I don't think I knew what Crumble was at the time.

Speaker 8:

Is there a way I can change the number on the live? Because I don't want people to get confused. Oh, we got a voice. Did you change it? Son of a bitch.

First Episode Chad:

Did you change the live number? No.

Speaker 8:

No, no, no.

First Episode Chad:

Um 677-0407. Here, do you have a do you have a uh keyboard? Because we gotta change it.

Tim:

How y'all just gonna leave me, man? How y'all just gonna call it quick, bro? But nah, congrats on a great run, bro. Um super happy for y'all, bro. And yeah, man, thank you for the great time. Thank you for the support. Keep doing the damn thing. And you know, I'm gonna be watching and see what happens next.

Speaker 8:

Okay, so um if we um I gotta figure out how to make sure this uh ring is live. I feel like I probably say we got some more?

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, we got one more.

Speaker 8:

Okay, okay.

First Episode Chad:

Let's go.

Jaeboy:

I said let's go. This is J Boy. This is a sick Jay Boy, by the way. Um very sad. One hell of an era, man. One hell of an era. Um I just wanted to say congrats on all the stuff that y'all have been doing, Chad on the new house, um him with building that amazing studio, and uh Javier just moves on. Anyway, um congrats everyone for the amazing stuff that you've done to the community. And I just wanted to put my two cents in there and show y'all how amazing y'all were as a podcast community. And for the amazing city of Fort Warren. So thank you so much for um. Giving us your all.

Speaker 8:

Give us the last 20 seconds. Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on.

Tim:

I wanted to finish. I want to address something real quick. Dustin, you're right. We haven't had you on. Um, secondly, I want to go ahead and just get it out here instead of keeping y'all hanging on by a thread. The funky panther itself is not completely going away.

Speaker 8:

First of all, y'all should have seen the asterisk on the goddamn picture. Look, I know we have like eight, we have I think it's the most people we've had on. Why isn't he saying you could for us to leave?

Tim:

We we we did we we did clickbait a little bit.

Speaker 8:

What's the whole fucking point? I want y'all, everyone. No, no proper goodbyes.

Tim:

We're not I mean I w I want to take the moment to address address that elephant in the room. And the Panther in the room. The Panther in the room, um, the large obese panther in the room, because we can't have elephants. Okay. Okay. Big obese panther. The the fat panther um in the room right now. And and the issue is is that we are not actually going away. We're gonna be reformatting in some way, shape, or form, but we are going to be losing a a founding member from Should we have a star like the CIA does, you know, whenever someone dies or a star like on the wall? Chet, you want to address this? Let's let's go ahead and let's let's just get it out. Let's just get it out there.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, so I mean, I I think that, you know, this has been one of the best experiences of my entire life the past five and a half years with you boys here on the Funky Panther. I think that I think that it's been, you know, it's time. It's time for me to take a step back and uh not not do this anymore. There's it's so much fun, and it's we've got the opportunity to meet so many good people. Like I said, like that was the best part of this. So many good people hanging out with y'all. Second part was meeting all the people uh that we've gotten to you know we've been able to meet over the the past forever. And uh yeah, I just think that it's time. I mean, not just you mentioned it was because of the move. It wasn't just because of the move. Like I I've been thinking about this for a while. I don't know. It just sometimes you just like it's time.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, time. I mean, and that's I totally understand. I get it. I think the time that we had uh the since the last episode being off was kind of like a bit like a relief almost. Yeah. I know like we the reason why we started doing this was to get together every week, drink, get drunk, talk a bunch of bullshit, and just um you know, I mean enjoy each other's company. And so it it's it sucks. It does. But um look, you you just got married, you got a new house, uh, you got a great position, new position at work, yeah, and you got a lot of things changing. So I know I I I get it. Again, you know, you're not going to be able to do that.

Tim:

Some would say that Chad's going through a transition of sorts.

Speaker 8:

So, I mean, then then that's if we're not if we're not evolving, then we're not really truly living. So it makes sense. And and it it trust me. I'm I I don't want to get fucking mushy because like I feel like I am.

Tim:

I do want to say though that Chad is welcome to pop in at any point that he feels like he wants to pop in.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, he has that, you know He has that ability. Yeah.

First Episode Chad:

So So if y'all have someone on their show that's like super like fucking badass, right? Like it's it, nope. You just said the cream of the crop. You sit him down on their golden pen the cream of the penis. You sit him down in their golden chair. You say cream of the cock? I just walk in and I'm like, move. Just move. You can sit on the floor. That chair is mine. Is that what you're saying? No, I'm not saying that I'm pretty sure that's what you I'm gonna take it.

Tim:

So you don't get to come in just whenever we have the cream of the crop showing up. The cream of the cock, as uh Javier said. That's not how this works. You show up whenever you feel like you want to show up. Not you won't know what guests we have. We're gonna block you from those. I mean social media, you can't see it. Oh, that's fine. Yeah. Yeah.

First Episode Chad:

If we got Shaq's coming on, you won't know. Okay. You pull that shit, and I will murder you in your sleep. You pull that and you're dead.

Tim:

I'm not saying figuratively jokes literally. Jokes on you. We've got Shaq showing up. Jokes on you.

Speaker 8:

Last week we're recording with Shaq.

Tim:

And Dennis Rodman. Yeah. They're both showing up together. You have a wedding dress. And a wedding dress. They're both wearing wedding dresses. They're gonna get married. I'm performing it.

First Episode Chad:

I was I was out here, like, you know, saying all these nice things about the people that we've had on the show, and they're already trying to replace us. Yeah, it looks like or replace me, rather. Wow. That's pretty that's pretty jacked up.

Speaker 8:

That's what happens when you leave.

First Episode Chad:

I don't know.

Speaker 8:

I don't know if you heard this, but uh Lou said in the voicemail that he's coming to take over.

Tim:

Oh, 100% in studio Jamie, and Lou can come by anytime he wants. Hell yeah. Lou has got one of those open invitations. Um Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Who has who has those?

Tim:

So what's y'all's plan? What are you gonna do? Well, so I I haven't really um Javier and I kind of discussed a little bit, but we really want to sit down. Um Lance from Emo Otaku, or Emotacos as I like to call it, has stated that he would like to come in and take your place.

Speaker 8:

We need one translucent ginger, gotta switch it out with another translucent ginger.

Tim:

I had uh I had the thought process of and I'm not I don't want to just put this out there, but um I want to talk to uh you know him and Antoine about maybe both of them coming on, and we just do one combined show and release it both on our separate platforms. But we record once. Uh it would be close for all of us except for literally he's gonna become Chad. Uh Lance would become Chad because he would have the furthest drive out of everyone. But you know, Antoine's just right down the road, Javier's right down the road, um, and so we have a central place to record and do all the stuff, and we and we could easily do something like that. But it's still up in the air, and there's still uh avenues that we might uh pursue.

Speaker 8:

Is it hot in here or is it just me?

Tim:

It's warm. Yeah. The AC might be uh fucked up again.

Speaker 8:

Well shit. Um well we can move this to the house always. You know, remember. Oh, but there's gonna be a bunch of cats in there.

Tim:

Yeah. Yeah. I mean we can turn on that AC.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, but it's gonna be like wow wow wow wow.

Tim:

So I'm gonna check, I'll I'll check the AC real quick.

Speaker 8:

No, no, no, no. I'm just I'm just being petty.

Tim:

I'm gonna check that AC real quick. Because I've been having to fill it up with uh Freon um because I've got, I guess, a massive leak somewhere.

Speaker 8:

I've got a massive leak right here on this piano. Um what was your favorite memory of uh being on the show, Chad?

First Episode Chad:

Um Damn, I don't know. Uh it'd have to be up there with either our hundredth episode Hardy at uh Panther Island Brewing. That was a good time. Everyone showed out, it was the best. South by was legit just because of us being able to do it, you know.

Speaker 8:

Um meaning like a bunch of art we met Ernie, right? We met J Boy over there, right? Uh I'm not sure. No, no, no, no, no.

First Episode Chad:

No, we met J Boy after that. It was a little bit after that. But we met quite a few people there.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, yeah. You got we got to see uh Lou and I was gonna say Rick James. Paul Wall.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, no, no, Rick James was there, as you recall. Uh it was a good old time, for sure.

Speaker 8:

It's been it's been a great five years. For 200 episodes, you know, I always say uh quality over quantity. I think so. And um, you know, we love Fort Worth. I'm just not gonna suck a politician's dick. Hey, so anyways, I'm so glad. What do you what do you keep alluding to?

Tim:

Right now, I'm going to uh go ahead and open the phone lines for donations because I I might have to get a new AC at the end.

Speaker 8:

Oh man.

Tim:

Well luckily they're actually not that expensive in the grand scheme of things, and it'd be really easy to swap out, but I've got some leak somewhere. I don't know if it'd be worth having a AC repair guy to come out out and actually No.

Speaker 8:

Anywho, um, yeah, no, it's it's been a great five years, and again to do it with Tim said Tim said, um anytime you want to come through, just you know obviously the invite was there, uh always. Uh Southpie was uh dope, it really was. And I remember uh bringing Ernie in, and it was uh you know a lot of a lot of fun, and uh who else did we have? Um the guy who was drunk. The one who was like, I didn't even know I was on the show, because I was really drunk. No, remember I tried really hard not to cuss, and then I listened to everyone else's podcast, and they're like, fuck, fuck it, fuck, balls, dick, shit. You know? That's that was pretty much the I think it was that one guy who was on that Christian show about Jesus. You d that guy had a big mouth on.

Tim:

So uh we did get a text message. My voice is annoying, so I'm just gonna text. Oh, what the h okay, what the heck? Trump's still alive, and now you guys are breaking up. Terrible news day.

Speaker 8:

Was that Jamie?

Tim:

Yeah, that was Jamie.

Speaker 8:

We're not breaking up. We're not breaking up.

First Episode Chad:

I mean, kind of, but it's still happening.

Speaker 8:

So so, but not really. We're still gonna be around. We're gonna plan the 200th party for the episode.

Tim:

Yeah, we will have a party at the end.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, we're gonna have a party and Chad's gonna be involved in that. Even if it's at uh what's it, uh Reflections or you know, whatever. We can do it at uh some good ass music or something.

Tim:

We could do a party at Maple Branch or something.

Speaker 8:

Yeah.

Tim:

Or uh just uh picking out everybody show up, not even tell them that's a party. Yeah, just show up. Everybody just show up.

First Episode Chad:

Why do we have a hundred and fifty people here?

Tim:

Everybody I mean, cool. Show up and uh let's support their business. Yeah. Right? They got that new coffee. Um have you seen that?

unknown:

Yeah.

Tim:

So I haven't tried either. My mom went up there for a while. Lance said it was is is pretty good. Yeah. So she said too. I'm gonna have to uh give them a shot. And um Yeah, all right, so uh enough of that. So what's everybody been up to? We've been uh we've been gone for about uh month and three quarters.

Speaker 8:

I was uh telling Tim I think we should go through our uh phone, our pictures.

Tim:

I don't take pictures. Shit.

First Episode Chad:

Like I really what are we going through exactly?

Speaker 8:

We're just gonna go through what we've done in the past month and three quarters.

First Episode Chad:

Okay, almost two months.

Tim:

Chad, Chad, Chad had a an important life date.

First Episode Chad:

Chad a GPT. So when so I guess July?

Speaker 8:

July, yeah. July 11th was our last episode that went was bright.

First Episode Chad:

Okay, so that was literally right before. Okay. So you go or me go? You go me go.

Speaker 8:

Well, maybe the Chad for last.

unknown:

Okay.

Speaker 8:

Maybe the Chad. Are you gonna you're not gonna do this?

Tim:

I I don't take pictures, so I couldn't I couldn't. Do you know what you've done? No. Do you know what you've done? That's school. Lots, lots of school. Um I can I can let me just let me just spell out what I've been up to. Um I am doing clinical rotations right now. I'm trying to get through all that. I'm gonna have to make a trip to Abilene pretty soon again for my second uh in-person uh two-day session for school. Gross. Um, while I'm also taking six hours of traditional college um on top of that. So uh needless to say, life is busy. October, almost every single day, I have something going on. Like I am trying to get get through my clinical hours that are required. Shadow, you like another beer? I'm good, thank you. Outside of that, uh Jesse and I are trying to plan a uh some sort of vacation at some point. Uh my birthday will be coming up in November, so it's not that far off. We'll be turning the big 40. So we're trying to figure out something for that. Um outside, um, you know, that's it. We're uh just moving along over here at the old house. Uh I had a clanker that mows my yard, and uh the clanker uh broke, so I've got to. Probably because you kept calling it a clank.

First Episode Chad:

They're self-aware.

Tim:

Uh I throw I was throwing beers at, saying you dirty clanker.

Speaker 8:

I don't I do not like that. I do not like that. I'm not a fan.

Tim:

That is so easy.

Speaker 8:

It sounds almost like something else, and I'm not a fan.

Tim:

It came out in the it's actually um it was reported as it is now the first like recorded derogatory term for a robot. Yeah. Is now calling them clankers.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, they had a thing where it's like you got them BBL upgrade, didn't you? That clanker. Yeah, I saw that.

Tim:

So uh I'm gonna get uh I got to send it back. Uh so I got bought a robot vacuum, uh robot vacuum, robot lawnmower. Um, and it actually did really well, but something happened, lost communication, so I've got to send it back. They're gonna send me a new one. So at least it's covered, but man, it was mowing my yard twice a week, and I had it set up to mow at a diagonal uh one direction on uh the first of the week and at an opposite direction um you know second half of the week. That's cool. Uh yeah, so it was nice keeping the yard nice and nice and trimmed. I like it nice and trimmed um because it makes the it makes the deck look bigger.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, you know uh what I say about a good deck.

Tim:

Yeah, so uh outside of that though, uh that's man, that's pretty much it. I haven't really been able to go to many concerts. I did go and work. Um I got to see uh Bush for the first time uh and got paid to be there. Uh Dickies, right? Yeah, Shinedown was there, which was not who I was going to see, but they were okay, and you know, they said some nice things and how Texas has always treated them really well. Uh did you know Shinedown has been around for 20 years? Yeah. Yeah. Did not realize that, and it made me feel old.

Speaker 8:

All the good strip club songs were from either Shinedown or like, you know.

Tim:

What was the first one? 45?

First Episode Chad:

I think that was the first big one.

Tim:

Staring down the barrel of 45. Yeah, they didn't even play that. Really? No. Wow.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, no. You also went and saw uh you were working the um I worked uh Google Dolls and uh Dashboard Confessional.

Tim:

Dashboard sounded, I saw them at their sound check and then got to watch a little bit of their set, and they sounded just as if I listened to them for the first time whenever I was a wee child. Uh went down to San Antonio, got to see some bands. I don't know if we talked about that last time, and uh it was for Lance's birthday, and uh we partied down there for a little while. Um that was pretty good. Found uh one of my new favorite restaurants in San Antonio. It is I can't remember what the name is now. Chachos. Chachos, chaos, yes. Oh, chaos. It's not what it didn't say nachos, it's just chaos.

Speaker 8:

No, no, no.

First Episode Chad:

No, but you get the nachos.

Tim:

No, no, no. King Kong nachos. I didn't get the child. You failed. What's wrong with you? Did not fail.

Speaker 8:

No, you should have gone. That's the whole point. Chachos nachos.

Tim:

That's the whole reason you I got I got Carnegizada, and it was phenomenal. Okay. Um you can get that anywhere.

Speaker 8:

You can't get chaos nachos.

Tim:

Dude, it was good. I'll get the nachos anywhere.

Speaker 8:

Did you see anyone with the nachos?

Tim:

No, I was I did not see anybody.

First Episode Chad:

So let me let me tell you what they do with with the King Kong nachos over there at Chacho. Lightness, please. You you get like basically the size of a pizza platter, right? And then you put like the biggest bowl of queso right there in the middle, and then you decide, I don't know which kind of nachos I'm gonna get, so I'm gonna make them all. You got one quarter of bean and cheese, you got one quarter with like I think it's green chili pork or something like that. Right. You got one with like chicken, all of them have different you know, cheeses and shit, and then one with like beef. And it is so much nachos. It is for like a family of five. Okay. It is a lot of nachos, but it's so worth it.

Tim:

So I got that, I was already kind of drunk when we got there, and then I ordered a because they have frozen jack and cokes, if you didn't know that. Oh shit. And they come in and it and it comes in a schooner, so it's it's a big old fucking jack and coke. Um, needless to say, I woke up in the middle of the night hungover.

Speaker 8:

Of course.

Tim:

Headache, blaring. I didn't bring my CPAP. That's how we know we're getting old. Um, Lance and I both didn't bring our CPAPs because we're like, oh, we're only gonna be gone for like two days, not that big of a deal. It was a big deal. I bet. Yeah. I felt I felt like absolute shit. But that's what I've been uh been doing, and uh yeah.

Speaker 8:

Cheers. Noise. Hooray.

Tim:

Noise.

Speaker 8:

I've been on Adderall, I uh got a CPAP machine. Um What do you think about it? I love it. I got well, I had to change the you know, pieces. I had to change them multiple times. Like I had to find which one worked for me. Yeah, you gotta get comfortable. Of course, I you know got the one that's just the nose with the thing up top. Yeah, you know? Yeah. And that one worked really well, so I'm using that now.

First Episode Chad:

Listen, did you get the 200 episodes ago? None of us had CPAPs. No. 200 episodes in, all three of us have CPAPs. Did you get the large uh large wide nose one?

Javier:

Okay. Uh, yeah.

Tim:

Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on, we got a collar. I mean, look at it.

Javier:

Oh, we got a collar.

First Episode Chad:

Oh, that's not it.

Tim:

Hello. Let me get you off there. Hello. You scared him.

First Episode Chad:

You scared the shit out of him. We got another caller. CPAP Pappy. Hello.

Tim:

Hello?

Jimmy Masterson:

Uh yes, my name is Jimmy Mastersons. Okay. Hello, can you hear me?

Tim:

Yeah, I got you, I got you. You're you're loud and clear now.

Jimmy Masterson:

My name is Jimmy Mastersons. I'm a podcast therapist, and I was calling in because I heard you guys are having some issues with your show.

First Episode Chad:

I I don't know if we would call them issues, but yeah, go on.

Jimmy Masterson:

Well, I was all excited to call you guys in, but then all this talk is CPAP machines. A bunch of old talks talking about CPAP machines is not very entertaining.

First Episode Chad:

Okay. I don't know what to so how do we fix this?

Jimmy Masterson:

Well, the way you fix this is I hear that one of your members are leaving.

Chad:

Yeah.

Jimmy Masterson:

They're saying so because uh, well, they recently got married, and from my experience, this is what happens when you get married. Your priorities change.

Sound drop:

Yeah.

Jimmy Masterson:

You start looking at other things, and you you you give up on your friends because, well, someone else owns your ball.

Chad:

Well that makes a lot of sense. Interesting. Interesting. Yeah. That makes sense.

Jimmy Masterson:

In my experiences, you know, I I just don't know where to go with this because the CPAM machine is just I had all sorts of talk about Adderall, that you know, Adderall is a gateway to happiness.

First Episode Chad:

It is.

Jimmy Masterson:

I I believe I don't know if Adderall and CPAM machines work together. This is just a weird thing.

First Episode Chad:

No, it's even happier. You gotta give it a go, bro.

Speaker 8:

No, this is eight balls and eight balls and um CPAPs don't mix.

Jimmy Masterson:

That's what they say.

Speaker 8:

Who says this?

Jimmy Masterson:

What I do know from history is if you grind up your Adderall and shove it into your CPAP machine and breathe it in. It's like like like the movie Doom. It's like spice. And it makes your life like fulfilled.

First Episode Chad:

Nice. I like it.

Jimmy Masterson:

I've never seen it. I really hope that that what you guys figure out in life. And the the the future of the podcast that you keep going and you guys still remain friends. Even though one of you are married and has given up your balls to someone else.

First Episode Chad:

Wow. I like that's what this has turned into. That's great.

Tim:

I mean, I believe we're all like uh all three of us are in committed relationships and uh we've all given up our balls, I believe.

Jimmy Masterson:

You can always leave the person you're committed with. You can just say, fuck it, I'm walking out. That's true. When you're married, it's actually legal. You gotta go through a bunch of bullshit, you gotta you gotta deal, you gotta split property, you gotta do all this stuff, you know, and your crypto.

Speaker 8:

Right. Lord, he's right, the crypto.

Tim:

Yeah, I mean, my my doge is uh, you know, it's been uh it's been making me money, you know.

Jimmy Masterson:

Is it?

Tim:

No.

First Episode Chad:

No. In fact, I'm in debt right now. Yeah, I think so.

Jimmy Masterson:

Thankfully, right now, if if Javier wanted to walk out, he just takes all of that or all and hits the road. That's right.

Speaker 8:

And maybe that for life. I would. I would totally. That's actually what I do now. I don't even eat. I just walk. He jacks off crickets and walk.

First Episode Chad:

Sounds like a fulfilling life.

Speaker 8:

I am on extended release.

Jimmy Masterson:

But it's great! I love it!

Speaker 8:

I can't really drink as much.

Jimmy Masterson:

I wish the best for you guys. Chad, we're gonna miss you.

First Episode Chad:

Thanks, buddy.

Jimmy Masterson:

I love you guys.

First Episode Chad:

Thank you. Love you too, man.

Speaker 8:

Love you. See you soon.

First Episode Chad:

Adios.

Speaker 8:

Cheers, buddy. Have fun. That was fantastic.

Tim:

Uh, we had somebody trying to call through while um why Dustin was on there. Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Uh Chet Greenballs. Let's let's see.

Tim:

But it was they did leave us a voicemail.

Caller:

And uh you crazy guys. Thanks for giving me a hard pack. I really look at that post and I was like, oh my gosh, we can't be happy. You guys are still going. Um, but yeah, let's have a party. I'm so glad you're on air. And if y'all have fun. Bye.

Chad:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Tim:

Um I I just want to tell you, uh the transcript thinks that your name is funny. It just says bye. It's funny.

Speaker 8:

Well, that was great. Two calls. Hell yeah. Yeah, that's awesome.

Tim:

Okay. Yeah. So uh Javier, we got sidetracked on Chacho's Nacho's uh. Jamie told us that that was the late night after the parties.

First Episode Chad:

That was where you went. Hell yeah, that's a spot.

Tim:

We went to the Chacho's over by um by the by the base, by the Air Force Base.

Chad:

Ours were outside the loop ring, right? Yeah.

Tim:

Yeah, right on the loop. I don't remember exactly where it was, like north northwest. That's that's yep, that's where we went. Okay, yeah, yeah. They have several locations, but that was the one that we went to. I think it's like probably the original one, maybe. Yeah, it was it was good. Uh I actually want to make a trip down to San Antonio just to eat a cha chos. Yeah.

Speaker 8:

We're gonna try to do that for um Thanksgiving because my brother lives down there. And so we're gonna probably spend a lot of time.

Tim:

Man, I thought about just uh, you know, I get like two days off in a row or three days off on the uh every other weekend. I thought just driving down there just for the day and eating cha chos.

Speaker 8:

If y'all had told me yesterday or to leave on Sunday to go do that, because I did I you know what I did for Labor Day? I went to work. You went to work? Yeah, I didn't want to be home. Gross. Um no, uh Bandera and 410. I think my brother lives near Bandera. Um okay, cat, got another cat. Uh what else? What else? Cars. Worked on cars. Oh, I listened to the financial uh audit podcast. Great podcast. Amazing podcast. You should listen to it. Yeah. The pe the things people go through like that are idiots that you know trying to get their shit in order, they're idiots. Like just me. I mean, me too. Oh, I paid off two credit cards. Nice. Three credit cards, actually. But then I had to put more stuff on one because you know there's a pair of shoes that come out. I hadn't bought shoes in nine months. Um, what else, what else, what else? Work, work, work, uh, you know, cats. Sister went to Texas Tech, so cheers to her. Uh went to uh Crystal Springs, saw an awesome band over there.

Tim:

Yeah, I popped in for just a minute.

Speaker 8:

Yeah. Oh, the New Orleans band. They're cool too. Uh what else? What else? What else? Uh-b. Um, hmm, okay. Sister left. Family came over. Everybody. Manchester United started back up, so uh now soccer's back on.

Tim:

Uh Hervey, it was uh $5,000 and a uh Brettling or Brightling or whatever watch. Yes. That's what he was.

Speaker 8:

That's exactly what he requested. Um and then also um Lance left the Army, so or Navy. Lance left the Navy, so cheers on that, buddy. It was good. Me and Chad were over there that night. It was uh steak night, so it was fun to hang out with him and everybody. And where was that at? It was at uh Nickel City. Cheers to Nickel City, Nickel City uh sponsored Chad for like about a year, I think. Uh when he wasn't working, when he did his thing.

Chad:

It was I felt like they gave me drinks for like three months, and then I felt bad for stealing drinks. No, you take advantage! You take advantage of it. Shout out to Tober for being the man.

Speaker 8:

And then you sell the drinks. Um we also went to um where did we go? That was cool. I can't think because I haven't had anything to eat. Uh he demanded also a gaggle of fleshlights. Yes.

Tim:

That is the proper term for a uh large sum of fleshlights, is a gaggle.

Speaker 8:

Tim's butt-inspired uh fleshlight. So fleshlights made out of his butt. Um a lot of cool things happening in Fort Worth. A lot of concerts. We went to see Google Dolls, obviously, and that's not a bad. Okay, that's about it. How's Google Dolls? Oh fuck, man.

Tim:

Great.

Speaker 8:

Amazing. I recommend any anytime.

Tim:

They sounded the same as they've always sounded. They sounded great.

Speaker 8:

But the thing that okay, these glasses, the thing I love about them, everyone. Are we all in together?

Tim:

Uh no, I was I was working. Oh.

Speaker 8:

I what is that?

Tim:

I I don't know.

Speaker 8:

Oh my fucking glasses. Sorry, my glasses were playing music. Um, everyone was with their cameras recording, and I'm just there recording on my w my glasses, just watching, but watching everybody with their thing up. Oh, turnstile is coming here next month. I did see that.

Tim:

Yeah, turnstile's gonna be here next month, and I'm gonna tell you what I plan on doing to see that show.

Speaker 8:

Jack off, dude.

Tim:

It's a hundred it was a hundred dollars to go to Panther Island. I'm like, I'm not paying $100 to be out there for turnstyle. But what I will do is it's an outdoor concert, and as long as it's not raining, I'm gonna go to the levee across from Panther Island and watch the show. There you go.

Speaker 8:

I just wish there were more shows here. You know, Dickies is such a great venue. Panther Island's a great venue.

First Episode Chad:

Um there are tons of shows at Dickies. What are you talking about? And there's tons of shows here in uh I wish I would have seen Bush. I didn't know about Bush. That's the thing. There's almost too many shows. Like it's hard to keep up with the amount of shows that are coming through Fort Worth.

Tim:

Halton Theater is Haltham City, but Haltham Theater's got shows happening all the time. Tulips has got shows almost, it seems like, nightly.

Speaker 8:

I mean, I would love to hear what Bush thought during 9-11 whenever he got that thing in his ear when they said, hey, you know, a second plane just hit.

Tim:

Not that Bush.

Speaker 8:

Are you sure?

Tim:

Gavin Rosdale.

Speaker 8:

Bush. Gavin who? Gavin Rosdale. Gavin de Gras.

Tim:

Gavin de Gras.

Speaker 8:

The guy who's saying I want your hill.

Tim:

Christy, you could uh you could you could pay in a uh an insane amount of money to go see Nine Inch Nails like I did.

Speaker 8:

Oh, when do they come into town?

Tim:

Uh two weeks.

Speaker 8:

Oh, fuck, I want to see them.

Tim:

Yeah. So I got that for Jesse's birthday. Or yeah, for her birthday present, and um I paid way too much for this for the seats, but I've never seen Nine Inch Nails myself, and it's her favorite band, so yeah, why not?

First Episode Chad:

Oh, uh my turn. Sorry. So uh after our last episode, I I went to Oregon. Uh we celebrated my mom's 60th birthday out there in like um what are it, Tillamook? Like on the cheese place. Yeah. It's on the coast of Oregon, and it's just like beautiful. Weather was perfect. It was like high of 70, and this is like early July. So like the weather was great. That weekend was awesome. Uh a lot of people came up and we went and got married. We had our bachelor and bachelorette party up there, which was fun. Got married, came back. Actually, while we were in Oregon, we we were trying to get these houses, and we we'd been looking at a lot of houses. There were two specifically that we fell in love with. And literally the two houses, the day that we saw them in person, both went like uh under contract. Not under contract, but uh whatever that first thing is, right? Someone put their tongue on it said, this house is mine now. Oh, um I usually put my wiener on it. Okay, I know you do. Uh they weren't under contract, but they were basically like in escrow.

Tim:

No, but not quite that. They were they were just like we got dibs. Option we'll call it dibs. Option period. We'll call it dibs. Whatever that is. Dibs.

First Episode Chad:

So that yeah, dibs. So they put dibs on these two houses, and I was like, all right, JD, who is like our our buddy and also legit uh realtor. If you need a realtor, go to DelaBerry uh because they're the shit. I'm just you know, not a plug, but a plug. Um yeah, I mean I mean I'm using them right now. Are you really? Yeah, yeah, they're fantastic. Uh and he's gonna he's gonna work for you. So we um we put we we were trying to put in backup offers for these two, and JD's just like that just rarely happens. You know what I mean? Like we can put up the backup backup offers, but these houses you're not gonna get. Really, just whatever. And um we did, we did. He's like, it sucks the sucks, bro.

Tim:

I'm sorry.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, basically. And we're like, all right, well, we'll just go ahead and do it, you know, let's whatever, might as well. And then we took all of our focus off the the house and put it all towards the wedding because that was coming up. Um, last time we met, remember, I t I told y'all that I interviewed for a job and I felt really good about it. Yeah, yeah. Well, I got it. So while we were in Oregon getting married, we also I got a call saying, Hey, you got this job, and I was like, Okay, cool. During Oregon, I also got a call from JD saying, Hey, that backup offer never went through, they didn't accept it. And I was like, Well, that sucks. I mean, why wouldn't they accept these? Like, I don't know. But the first offer fell through, and so now we get to go through the whole process, and you're the number one bidder.

Speaker 8:

The one that originally went into period. Right. Dibs period.

First Episode Chad:

Dibs, period. They they backed out or they didn't back out, they couldn't get funding. And so generally in those situations, they just automatically like tee up the backup offer. But we we had offered, since we were backup, we put like at cost, you know, like what they were offering the house for is what we're gonna pay, period. Well, now we had the opportunity to say, okay, hold on, like we're the only option you got now.

Speaker 8:

Let's negotiate, motherfucker.

First Episode Chad:

Dude, JD got us $19,000 in uh like concessions. And holy shit. That's a lot of Doritos.

Chad:

That is that is a lot of people. That's a lot of anti multiple pools with Doritos. It's a lot of concessions, a lot of talkies.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, so we got a really good deal on this house and it appraised for 10 grand more than what we paid for on top of the 20 or 19, whatever.

Tim:

Like we just it was the best case scenario. You're you're immediately getting um, what's it called? Whatever you got uh money in the house. Um, that's nice.

First Episode Chad:

So, you know, it's a house, it's it's closer to work. I've been working in in Dallas for a long time now, and that hour, hour and a half drive each way is just killing me. It is awful. And now I am 20 minutes. Today was the very first day that I drove to work, uh, and it was 20 minutes to work, 20 minutes back. It was just fun, it was so nice. That's nice. I don't know if people realize like people that that commute and people that don't commute, you don't understand how much it fucks with your mentals, like legitimately. Like you are brain dead after like stop and go traffic for an hour and a half. Like it just it ruins you, especially daily. And like I feel like I was getting angrier stressed out all the time. I'm brain dead. I'm gonna say things.

Tim:

We should bring back uh we should bring this to the to the Americas, not bring back, but bring to the Americas the uh the Japanese businessman style of work. Suicide? No. Jesus where you go Trigger warning, where you go to work, sorry, and then after you get off work, you go get completely shit-canned. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you stay either in a capsule hotel, or you or you sleep on the sidewalk because you're so drunk and you missed the last train out of Tokyo.

First Episode Chad:

Did you and it's not just it's not just a Japanese thing, it's kind of like an Asia holistic thing. But did y'all see when Dane was out there in Taiwan and there was a guy that was just like butt ass naked, drunk on the sidewalk, and Dane's like helping the guy, but also recording the whole thing, like, bro, are you alright?

Chad:

Hey buddy, uh it is hilarious. Here, pal, I'm from Texas, and we don't do that shit around here in these parts. It's hilarious. And like, if you message Dane asking him more questions, he sent you more videos. So I got a whole array of the whole situation, and it was fucking hilarious.

First Episode Chad:

It was great. So, yeah, so that same weekend, got married, got a new job, got to the house. Uh, we we came back and we immediately went to our honeymoon. We went to uh Playa Mujaras, which Isla Mujares or Playa? We went to Playa. We did end up going to Isla Mujaras. We didn't like we didn't know when we were gonna go, but I know Herbie and Christy mentioned that they went and they loved it, and so we're like, all right, screw it, we're gonna go. Well then JD so happens to decide that he also wants to go to Isla Muhares because his his sister and brother-in-law are both there. And so we go to Isla Mujaris and we meet him there, and then we just get shit-canned all day. Like we were just driving around in a golf cart, circling the island, bar hopping, drinking on the beach. It was great. He he uh he basically you know crashed our honeymoon, but it was like in the best way.

Speaker 8:

You know, I feel like that's another thing that happened for your wedding party, your wedding reception here at Nickel Bridge.

First Episode Chad:

We had an at-home wedding party, yeah.

Speaker 8:

And uh guess who met up with us after?

First Episode Chad:

JD.

Speaker 8:

JD. Guess what happened after?

First Episode Chad:

I don't remember anything after that second fucking Jager bombs, Jagaboms, Jagabombs, Jagabombs. Dude, I haven't had Jaeger bombs in at least seven to eight years, and I think that I've had more Jaeger bombs in the past month than or two month month than I have in the past ten years. Because you don't value yourself and you and you hate your life. Something like that. You're a degenerate at heart. Yeah. Um I think that was the majority of it. Like I'm looking through pictures, like you said, we've eaten at some really good restaurants. Oh, we went out to uh what?

Speaker 8:

Go ahead, sorry.

First Episode Chad:

We went to Utah uh for my birthday. Yeah, I saw that. My birthday was uh a couple of weeks ago, and so we went to Utah and I went back to the red iguana. Oh still good. It's so good. Still good, it's so good. They have like nine different kinds of molees, and every single one of them is just straight fire. It is the best.

Tim:

You know, Jesse's got uh she's starting her new uh new schedule, and she'll have Sunday, Monday, Tuesdays off. And you know, maybe I can just uh somehow rig a uh I'll have Monday and Tuesday off. We just leave Sunday night, fly to Utah. Dude. Go do that and just come back.

First Episode Chad:

Dude, it was a 45-minute uh drive to Park City, and Park City was like a high of 78. Yeah. The weather was beautiful. We ended up seeing some band. You might know who they are. They're like this early 90s band. You two. I hate you two. Bono was there, right?

Tim:

Oh, it's me, Bono! I'm a giant twat. Bono is a giant twat, and I'll never forgive him for the whole iPhone, iPad, iPod thing. We know, yeah, we know.

First Episode Chad:

Uh, we we went to this brewery, and we were she uh Seris had plans to have this really nice birthday dinner, and so we ended up going to this like Thrive Apothecary type place and then eating some gummies, and like, we don't want to go to a nice dinner, we're gonna go to some random concert where everyone was talking about it at the brewery. So we went, it's kind of like their version of Red Rock. Like it was you're kind of like up on this green, and there's like an amphitheater, and there's tons of people, and then just this beautiful view of mountains. But it was it was called Big Head Todd and the something or other. Do you not that wasn't it? I don't remember and the whatever.

Tim:

I've never heard of Big Head Todd.

Speaker 8:

I knew a dude named Big Head Todd, but you know, you know. Tell me more. He had a big head.

First Episode Chad:

Okay. Dude, it was so nice to get outside. Like, we it's been so hot, and and this has not even been a hot this has been a mild summer for us. But it's been so hot. Like, I don't, it's hard. You don't want to go outside. Like, I'm outside when I'm walking around work and stuff. But like we went on some hikes and it was just beautiful. Um you would know one of the songs uh by Big Head Todd and the Monsters. Oh, that's the band? Big Head Todd and the Monsters is the is the band. You would know this song, I believe, because it's on commercials.

Chad:

Let's see. Let's see if it plays. Let's see.

Speaker 8:

Oh, uh uh Z top?

Javier:

No, I gotta come on. The song goes bang, bang, bang. Yeah, that's Z Top.

Speaker 8:

I thought that was Z Top. Isn't that Z Top?

Chad:

So he just does a cover of it? I thought for sure maybe that was a song that I recognized. I was like, I know that song. Never mind. I don't know. There was a ton of old white people. They loved it. They all knew his music. I'd never heard it. Uh the only thing that matters is that you enjoyed it. Dude, Dustin knows. Dustin knows who it was. Yeah. See? Of course, Dustin knows. Dustin knows all music.

Speaker 8:

He's like the king of music. He's like the final boss of music.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, we were we were super high at that concert, just like staring up the stars, listening to some music that we didn't know. It was great. It was fantastic.

Speaker 8:

I wonder what the people around you were like, what are you doing? Like, we're drunk and he's looking at the sky. Is he planning a terrorist attack? What's he doing? He's waiting for a plane to come over here. No, that's awesome. That sounds like a great couple of months.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, I mean, the past really just a month. It's been a month and a half. Yeah, since the last time we recorded, it has been nuts. It's been a month and three-quarter, I believe. The past month and three-quarter have just been phenomenal.

Speaker 8:

Month and three-quarter. He's not wrong.

First Episode Chad:

And I want to I also want to be clear. This is nothing to do with me getting married that I'm leaving the podcast. We I thought about this months ago. I was like, 200 episode is a good time. That's a good time. I wasn't even married yet. I just I thought it was time. I just want to put that out there. Nothing against Sarah. No ill will.

Speaker 8:

Are you just saying that because she just popped on and like commented?

Chad:

No, but now that she is, I do want to make sure that she's like, hey, Phil, I love you, right?

Speaker 8:

And uh thanks for marrying me, by the way. Um, and also, you know, doing the things. But um That's not because you're uh we're married now.

First Episode Chad:

No, I mean things have changed over the years. Like we know.

Speaker 8:

Hey, look, again, I said earlier, we evolve in our own ways, you know? Right. We evolve. And uh if we're not learning something new every day, then we might as well just die. So I get it. I understand.

Tim:

Well So uh so yeah, Trump made a big announcement today. Oh, yeah, what he's a big old He's not dead. Oh, he's definitely not dead. So did you see all the stuff that was going around like on TikTok and different things like videos and like so one of them was like showing the presidential motorcade, and they're like, there's an ambulance. There's an ambulance in every single presidential motorcade. Just FY. Whenever they come here, if he comes to Fort Worth, I'm you know, my organization's involved in that. Um so that was nothing alarming to me. It was just all this, you know, he's got these spots on his hands and all this other stuff, and he's been out, you know, and whatever, and it's all these conspiracies. And then they show this, and it's they they decided to move Space Force uh headquarters from its temporary headquarters in Colorado to Alabama.

First Episode Chad:

Huntsville and he made it didn't he make it like a anti-Biden thing? Oh yeah, of course, everything is right.

Tim:

Yeah, Biden, Biden wanted to keep them in Colorado, and uh we're finally gonna go ahead and move them uh because you know, Biden, Sleepy Joe. Yeah, I yeah. I wish I could do a good Trump impressive nation, but I can't.

Speaker 8:

Only whenever I'm not forced to. Yeah.

Tim:

That's true. Yeah, so uh that that was the big that was the big thing. I like tuned in for a bit and I was like, nah, I'm out. Don't care that much about that.

Speaker 8:

They're gonna say, you know where we have our space force, it's gonna be not Colorado, it's gonna be in Hunts. Huntsman, Huntsville? Huntsville, Tennessee. Huntsman, Tennessee. Huntsman, Tennessee. You know where the the the place where, you know, god damn it. Okay, hold on. Give me give me a second. What a fucking idiot, though. Like you're gonna move it to from beautiful, by the way, where they have that uh seed farm, you know, the one in the temporary. Is it it's not there anymore?

Tim:

No, no, no, no, not the seed farm. The seed farm's fine. Uh the the the the the headquarters was temporary, and now they're moving the headquarters to Alabama. Like, why? Beautiful Gulf Shores, I hear. I hear all the idiots in the city. I believe they I believe they moved them to mobile. Mobile is wonderful these times.

First Episode Chad:

Aren't like uh everything's everything's spaces near the coast. Near the coast, yeah. I mean, so that actually kind of makes sense.

Speaker 8:

Near the coast.

Tim:

I mean But then like all like the ever all the monitoring for all the space traffic and shit is in up in uh Cheyenne Mountain, up up in uh Colorado. Okay. Yeah, so like NORAD and all that that monitors like missile launches. I've seen Terminator 3 shit, yeah.

Speaker 8:

I know where things are, is what Trump says. I don't know. I don't make those rules, but I I guess, you know, whatever. My brother's been there to that place whenever he was doing stuff for NASA.

Tim:

I'm going to uh I will the the day that they say that there's gonna be a door gunner on a spacecraft position for Space Force is the day that I I enlist in Space Force. Are you talking about a gun? No, sir.

First Episode Chad:

No, sir.

Chad:

This isn't fucking like Independence Day, and you're the red baron out there, like, I got it, coach!

First Episode Chad:

You count on me. Like, you're not that guy. Isn't that the same guy as like the shitter's fool? It was the same as shitter's fool.

Tim:

He's also the same guy that was like squatting in the house in fucking California.

Javier:

Don't worry, Mr. President. I have a myth hole on my deck. Hey God, he's remember me.

Chad:

That's it. That's it.

Javier:

Remember Independence Day?

Speaker 8:

I remember Independence Day.

Chad:

What a good movie.

Speaker 8:

What a great movie. Remember Will Smith?

First Episode Chad:

And I don't really remember I remember watching it, but I don't remember anything about it. I never saw the second one. Really? That's good. I need to watch it again because I don't remember shit about it.

Tim:

I watch all the Independence Days. I mean, there was the two. All of them. I watched all of them. So every single one of them. All two. All two of them.

Speaker 8:

What do you think about Trump having a UFC fight on the 250th anniversary of America? I think it's a good idea.

Tim:

I think it's a great idea. Put it right in the front lawn. Let uh let people uh let Trump and uh Biden go at it.

First Episode Chad:

Idiocracy, my dude.

Tim:

Bare knuckle. Oh man. I can't wait till Dwayne Mountain Dew, Camacho Trump, uh he uh, you know what a time to be brings in uh brings in Bigfoot and crushes everybody with the with the car, with the truck, with the big truck. Big truck. Big truck.

Speaker 8:

So um let's talk about five years ago versus now. Like what have there been changes of here in Fort Worth regarding, you know, five years? Five years now, five years ago to now.

Tim:

So there was uh restaurants that opened and restaurants that have closed. Yes. We lost uh Funky Picnic. We did. Um we've lost Hot Box Biscuits. Yeah. Uh Heim has sold out their whole uh organization. Meh they they are no longer involved in Haim Barbecue. Meh. They're opening a pizza place. One trick pony, right? They're gonna be opening up a pizza place up uh where hot bot hotbox biscuit was. Oh really? Yep, that's the that's the pizza place. So according to uh sources, is that uh Mr. Haim himself, uh whenever they were tired of eating barbecue, he'd make pizzas for his crew. And uh so that's what they're gonna do is make pizzas. So I guess he's gotta probably non-compete against barbecue. Yeah, I'm sure. So yeah, making uh making making pizzas. But yeah, so I mean we had lots of places a car drove into the side of Walloons, they've since fixed, you know. Um that lots of lots of things happened. Uh we lost one of uh one of my favorite uh restaurants in uh Fort Worth to an explosion at the Sandman Hotel. Yeah. Um yeah, lots, lots of different things. Lots of different things.

Speaker 8:

And a new one that opened up over there at the old um Black Cat Pizza Spot. I don't know if you've heard of it. It's this really nice Asian Japanese food place.

First Episode Chad:

Oh, is it the sushi one? Yeah, like uh almost like Hatsuyuki type deal, right? Yeah, yeah, I've I've uh heard about that, but I've not been yet.

Speaker 8:

I am excited to try it. I'm I'm very pumped. City's growing wide, obviously. Here in our neck of the woods, yeah, we got Crystal Springs with a big cat uh burger.

Tim:

Uh breaking news, Dustin has sent me pictures of the uh Vandenberg Space Force base. And I will say that the logo is probably the best logo out of every branch of the military because it looks very much Star Trek. Really? Oh, yeah. It's great. All right, go on.

Speaker 8:

That's the name. Oh, thank you, G.

Tim:

Yeah, uh Crystal Springs opened up. Uh we it started off as uh um, you know, not a lot of people going, and now it's packed every single time that we're over there, which is great for them, but a little annoying for us locals that are around in the area. I like a more reserved place.

First Episode Chad:

I opened the front patio too, though.

Tim:

It's like more sensitive. Yeah, dude, you're right, you're right. My my favorite place now is to go to like Nickel City. Chuck and cheese. It's to go to Nickel City. Growth. Nickel City at about 12 o'clock, one o'clock on a Monday. It is the perfect time. Daydream. Yeah, you go so I'm off, you know, r uh every other Monday and just show up there at Nickel City about about noon, and we know the bartenders that are there around that time, and uh it's it's good. It's not busy. We have good conversation, they got music playing, but it's not too loud. You can hear yourself actually talk. God, I'm fucking old. Yeah. But I do man, I prefer places like that. But I understand it doesn't sustain the bills, and that's okay. I'll just have to make do and go, you know, be an alcoholic degenerate in the middle of the afternoon.

Speaker 8:

Look, 15 years ago, 15 years ago was all about 7th Street. You know, we were always going to 7th Street or downtown, you know, the old original poorhouse was over there and the good old library and what was that one place the local the local whatever on the local school 7th?

Tim:

Is it still a thing? Yeah, local school.

First Episode Chad:

I like downtown again, though. I'll be honest with you. Like I I like the little area over there by uh like Thompson's. I've been to the library twice over the street.

Tim:

If you liked it so much, you would have just moved offices to the downtown location. If that was an option, I would have done it. But instead, you jumped ship and you left fucking Fort Worth.

First Episode Chad:

Thompson's, I don't know. I it was it was two months ago where I was. I haven't been to Thompson's since they've revamped everything. Best, best happy hour in Fort Worth, Thompson's. Thompson's? It's $7.50 from like Fortnite. $7.50, all you can drink. No. Galmate. For like their cocktails, but they're cock that's like half off. Like that is a really good deal. Their cocktails there are phenomenal. We all know that. $7.50, like old-fashioned, or like really nice gin cocktails, all sorts of stuff. Their classic list, all $7.50. And then on, I think it's Mondays, it's all day. Monday? Sunday or Monday, it's all day.

Tim:

See, the problem is like downtown with the parking situation and all that is park on the road, especially on the weekends. I guess on the on the weekend, well. It's empty.

First Episode Chad:

And you don't have to pay.

Tim:

It's free. Yes, yes, doesn't it? Where I'm just so drunk he just sleeps on the bar. Yeah, he did it before.

Speaker 8:

Or no, he threw up on the bar.

Tim:

I've thrown up on the bar, and that wasn't at Nickel City. That was at Winchester. No, no, no. That was at the fancy place on no. That was the bathroom. He did that. The fancy place on Magnolia. The usual. Oh, the usual usual. Yeah. I threw up on the bar at the usual. I've been I've since been back to the usual. This first time back in like 15 plus years. Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Where's y'all's places to go? Call us. 817-677-0408. 817-677-0408. Give us a call now if you want to get on the Funky Bather!

Tim:

So I used to like this one place out um out past uh you go Lancaster, out east, all the way out. It was called the Ozzie Rabbit. The problem with going to Ozzie Rabbit was that's a long drive for me to get back home. Yeah. And so didn't go there all that often, but it was a it was a I love that place. It was a good spot. I know uh what is it? Dustin, I think, likes uh caves or whatever. I think that was uh one of Dustin's places. Arlington? Yeah.

Speaker 8:

LRB's is fucking expensive. And you only go there to propose or if you got a lot of money. That shit is fucking expensive.

First Episode Chad:

I'm pretty excited about uh have you guys been to the Sterling across from Thompson's? Yeah, the Sterling is alright. The cocktails were pretty good, like not as good as Thompson's, but it was pretty good. Uh but the vibe there was pretty swanky. It was pretty neat. I haven't been to Rivers yet.

Speaker 8:

What? That's right around the corner. Right around the corner.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, so I I know, I haven't been yet.

Speaker 8:

I like it, but the dr the cocktails are fucking expensive. And yeah, um are they pricey like happy hours alright?

First Episode Chad:

I didn't try the pizza.

Speaker 8:

It's good. It's it's like I mean, is it son of a butcher? Yeah, son of a son of a baker.

First Episode Chad:

Son of a baker. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, because it's the same one as downtown, the one that took over. Houston Street Bar, right?

Speaker 8:

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that pizza is fire. Yeah. Um the only thing though, it did take a while to get my drinks, and um I I they put an extra one on my tip. Allegedly. So I I went yesterday because it was close to the house. You put an extra pizza on your town? If it was an extra pizza, then I would have been cool with it because I would have eaten it. But they put an extra one on my tip. Oh yeah, they put a one in front of the number. Oh shit. Yeah. I disputed it with my bank and but I was pretty pissed off and I was like, why didn't I keep the copy of it? And so yesterday when I was over there, allegedly um I was I kept the copy. Yeah. But I was like, what the fuck, man?

Tim:

Like That's a new that's a new one. I guess I'm gonna have to keep the copy of my receipt, man. Like, I never checked that. I never checked that. I don't do a very good job of checking. I don't check that.

Speaker 8:

But I you know, I I'm a good tipper. I tip really well. You know, I tip over 30%.

First Episode Chad:

And um But I I was like, man, this is kind of For them to take advantage of you after 30% is pretty wild.

Speaker 8:

But I only had two drinks. The thing is I had like two mules, it was like forty bucks.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Oh, that's a lot, man. Yes. And so I was like, look, it took you forever. Like it's you sh honestly, you didn't have too many people at the bar. And you're just gonna throw one on It probably wasn't her, probably someone else. Yeah.

Tim:

You know, but Oh okay. So we got so we got some uh got some beef happening. Uh so uh Tasman says uh I have personal beef with Rivers. How are you called Rivers wine and cocktail and not a single glass of wine or any of your actual menu cocktails are on happy hour? That's uh that's a good point. That is a good point. Um yeah, I'll probably stay away from there then. I'll check it out once. I'll get the pizza.

Speaker 8:

Just to grab one drink. You can't go after this. Why?

Tim:

I have to dude, I gotta get up four o'clock in the morning. I'm up at 4 a.m. I can't do that. We're gonna we're gonna have a party and we're gonna have a card.

First Episode Chad:

I'm not dead, and y'all don't invite me anyway. We don't do anything anyway! It's okay. Everything's fine. This is the real reason, gents. Fuck you.

Tim:

So um I lost my train of thought with that one. Thank you. You're welcome. I want there's a couple things that I want in Fort Worth, and I'm I'm kind of I'm I'm getting to a point. I I came across a TikTok where this girl's on there, and she's going on about like her favorite spots and kind of showing showcasing favorite spots. And some people in the comments got in there and started saying, hey, you need to stop because we need to gatekeep Fort Worth. And I agree to an extent. Um you you heard what hat what's happening um right by where you work at, actually, over off of um uh White Settlement Road in University. Foundry district. Yeah, so they're gonna be uh they're tearing down you know all those dealerships and everything over there, and they're gonna build this gigantic um multi-story uh business park and hotel, and then they're gonna have um expensive ass um apartments over there and restaurants and all that. And I I like to see growth, but I don't want to see growth in my neighborhood because that means traffic. And my traffic's already gotten shitty on White Settlement Road.

Sound drop:

Yeah, yeah.

Tim:

I'm giving away where I'm where we record at uh because we're right down the street from there. But my traffic's got shitty on White Settlement Road already because they've got all the apartments and all the businesses going in there, and now whenever I go into downtown, have to go down university or whatever, and or White Settlement to University and all that, that's gonna be shitty down there.

Speaker 8:

Well, I mean, it's already shitty and going down here, so I mean the roads are fucking turning into shit.

Tim:

Well, the roads are terrible. Where are our ta tax dollars are not going to infrastructure? What's going on? I'm sick and but uh but we're gonna spend a shit ton of money to to put in these you know tax cuts and whatnot for for this bullshit down there. Uh they better have some affordable shit. That's what I'm that's what I'm getting at. Because I I've got to a point now that I can't go and spend you know fifty, sixty dollars every time I want to go out to eat at like and support local.

Speaker 8:

I think that's everywhere now.

Tim:

But that's what it's getting to, and but if I go to Applebee's, I can still get like the two for twenty or whatever. I can go to Applebee's and get get get cheap shit. I can go to go to um go to Chili's.

Sound drop:

Yeah.

Tim:

I think we're I think we're starting to see a resurgent of the the chain restaurants is what's happening. Yeah, it's because of money.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, it's cheaper. It's cheaper. That's why Applebee's and uh Chili's Chili's has got like a big social media following, but Applebee's and chili are making a comeback because it's cheap.

Tim:

So as a as a as a poor kid growing up, yeah, did y'all feel because I felt this way about um Olive Garden. Yeah. That was fancy. Luxury. It was luxury.

Chad:

Yeah.

Tim:

Like for the longest time I thought like that was that was fine dining. I mean, Sisi's was nice. Poncho's wasn't. CC's was great. Poncho's is great.

Speaker 8:

Have y'all been to the one above La Hacienda?

Tim:

No, I haven't been there yet.

Speaker 8:

Man, we've been there twice.

First Episode Chad:

I've been wanting to go.

Speaker 8:

God damn. You want to talk about good guisada? Some good ass guisada there.

First Episode Chad:

There's Chili's Tacova's boot. Oh, I saw that. I think that uh Jordan, I think, posted something about that.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, they got in a store over there uh on uh in the stockyard or something.

Tim:

Yeah, Tacova's, yeah.

Speaker 8:

Yeah.

Tim:

So I I gotta I gotta be I gotta beef with those places.

Speaker 8:

Dang kids and the hip hops and such. Thank you. I do say that. Still owe John uh drinks and uh stickers.

Tim:

You gotta give me the you gotta give me the stickers. I will. Give me the stickers so I can give them to John. Absolutely. Um I thought I had stickers in my backpack the other day whenever I saw them last.

Speaker 8:

Look, I'm all down for chilies, man.

Tim:

Look, my issues with Tokovas and and different boot places like that is a lot of these boot places stop carrying boots that actually fit my narrow ass foot. That's that's my issue. And then I have to buy a size smaller, and then my toes are cramped up at the end, but it's bullshit.

Speaker 8:

I'm a triple E in boot. You've got a wide foot.

First Episode Chad:

I've never purchased boots before. Really? No? No. You should. I don't I don't think I do. Like I don't really need to. I don't know why I would need them. I think you need a five never been on a farm. Why do you have boots? I've been on a farm. And then like on a farm? I used to go to a dairy farm on the in the summer times. Look, I've got hiking boots, hunting boots, work boots. I don't need to go boots, sex boots, spec boots, listen. All four of those boots are the same boots.

Tim:

I think uh I think every Texan, every Texan, every Texan needs a pair of boots. Yeah. And every Texan needs a hat.

Chad:

Okay.

Tim:

And and it's because like you never know. There's gonna be a there might be an event or something like that that happens where it's like that that needs to be the dress code. Like you've got to feel the room, right? If you have a wedding to go to and it's a it's a Western themed wedding, you want to wear that.

Speaker 8:

Or a Mexican wedding.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, I'm I'm just not gonna, I'm not. I'll be left out, I guess.

Tim:

There's something to say about it.

First Episode Chad:

I wear my my nice shoes that look like they could be Camboo.

Tim:

There's something to say about some really nice, uh, really nice boots, like maybe some cayman belly or something like that that just like it just it just screams oil tycoon. You know they got boots made out of fish? They do.

Speaker 8:

Fish!

Tim:

Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know that. That's a Brazilian fish, too. It's the one that I don't like the style. I don't like that style of boot, though. I don't like the so crazy.

Speaker 8:

Whenever I get married, I hope everyone dresses like, you know, uh the 80s or the 90s.

First Episode Chad:

Listen, for your wedding, I promise you, if you ask, I'll get cowboy boots, they will have one foot long points.

Chad:

One foot long points and then they're gonna curve all the way up to my knee. Like. I'm gonna save this.

Tim:

Hey, hey. The entire wedding party has to wear boots like that.

Speaker 8:

No, no, no boots like that, Chad. Only Chad.

Tim:

Boots like that, the taco hats.

Speaker 8:

Only Chad. Bolt and you wear a boat. Oh, fuck. Taco hat.

Tim:

Hey, I'd wear a taco hat. The gray but like shimmery gray like suit, almost like a silk suit.

Speaker 8:

You're gonna look you're gonna dress like um um Chelino Sanchez. Okay. Dress like Chelino Sanchez.

Tim:

And you better, you gotta have uh for the entertainment, we need uh we need the uh what's the the narcos uh dude? I'm gonna have a band. The narcos Nortino game for the bands. Right. Of course. Of course. What's the band? What's what's that band? It's gonna be 1,000 Mexicans at this time. It's the the narcos. The the narco music. Corridos. Yeah, we need that.

Speaker 8:

Okay. Beautiful.

Tim:

Just beautiful.

Speaker 8:

Um we're all witnesses. Thank you, Christy. Yes, so that way y'all know. Shut up, John. So it's gonna be great. Groomsmen wear ha the groomsmen have the Virgin Mary on their back. What if I made y'all all dressed like John the Guizama from Romeo and Juliet? Yes, please. Oh my god. Oh, I knew that. It's all coming together.

First Episode Chad:

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Dude, okay, so you you saw the shirt. The the shirts that I had made for the wedding?

Speaker 8:

Yeah, oh yeah. I fucking loved it. I saw a picture of it. I saw a picture. I was like, what the fuck? Where the fuck did you get that? I fucking loved it.

First Episode Chad:

That was so much fun. It was Danny's idea. He's like, you should get shirts made where you and Serish just flipping everyone off. I'm like, well, that just, you know, it's a wedding. So like Kanmate. We did put one of them, one of the pictures, but it was like, did you see the pictures?

Tim:

Yeah, I saw pictures of it. Yeah.

First Episode Chad:

So it's like everything us. It had mountains and it had cheese and it had our both of our dogs on there and pictures of us. It was awesome. It was fun. It was cool. It was cool as well. Serish had no idea that me, Zeus, and Danny were wearing those underneath our suits until she got up close, you know what I mean? She and she realized it was it was pretty good. It was funny shit.

Speaker 8:

That's pretty fucking awesome.

First Episode Chad:

So yes, all that to say, it's fun to go fun on your wedding. Like do some weird shit.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, that's the whole point. Like my cousin got married a month ago, and it was a great wedding. Um but it was just too normal, you know?

First Episode Chad:

Just like traditional, normal wedding.

Speaker 8:

Traditional, but also Mexican too. You know, they had the Bibodon where they, you know, run around uh and uh they threw we threw them up in the air like we did with uh dirty mic and uh who else did we do that to?

First Episode Chad:

Anthony. Did we? Yeah, I'm pretty sure we did with Anthony.

Speaker 8:

Oh you did. Yeah, downtown. Yeah, yeah. Is that when you got the hernia? No, no. No. I still gotta get that looked at. Yeah. Made a promise. One thing at a time, man. You got the CPAP, you got the meds. Yeah. Now I gotta do a cat. I gotta scan a cat. I gotta scan a cat.

First Episode Chad:

A lot of cats to scan.

Speaker 8:

Yes, that's right. Hey, wait, hold on, wait. Yes. Um, but no. Yeah, good wedding. It's gonna be a good one. Can't wait. We'll see what happens.

First Episode Chad:

Are you did you propose?

Speaker 8:

Not yet. Or or am I?

First Episode Chad:

Am I? It's kinda I don't know.

Tim:

Well, you know, it's been five years.

Speaker 8:

Uh so yeah, no.

Tim:

Um it's been uh it's been ten years for uh for me. So when you get married.

First Episode Chad:

When you get married, where's the wedding?

Tim:

They're uh not not not yeah, yeah. We're just gonna put our names on a bunch of uh expensive ass shit together and call it good.

Chad:

Hell yeah. Yeah, you know, yeah.

Tim:

So uh, you know, uh in my world, we were I told you we've been talking with JD.

First Episode Chad:

From the chat, real quick, sorry. The Funky Panther had become the mature Panthers, boys to men.

Speaker 8:

Boys the man. First off, na na nane, Eric, no, I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know what you're talking about.

Tim:

But I told you uh I said I've been talking with JD. Right, right. Right. So I had a meeting with JD the other day, and we're just discussing uh investment opportunities. And yeah, so uh this this boy's I'm hoping like November, come November, December, I've got my first rental property. That's what I'm pushing for. And uh he's he's man, and he's he's already hustling, and we don't, we don't, we're not in this position just yet to start, but he's already sending me shit, and I'm like, oh man, that's a good deal. Oh man, it's a good deal. Send me turds. But we like turds. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, you know what turds, you polish them up, it turns into a diamond.

Tim:

Yeah, talking to him about it, he was like, you know, you gotta go in it with a with an idea of like you take a you take like a three or a five and you bring it to like a seven or an eight. It doesn't have to be perfect. No, it doesn't, it shouldn't be perfect.

First Episode Chad:

You don't want it to be perfect, yeah. Don't want to be too good. No, because then it's gonna get like you want it to look nice so it's not trashed, but you don't want it to be too nice to where it's costly to fix. Correct. I mean like right there in the sweet spot.

Tim:

Yeah, so that's uh that's a game plan, is we're just trying to get some uh we're trying to diversify some uh some some stuff, man. That's awesome. Good for y'all. Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Well, nothing to do with me, but you know, the the dent shop's expanding.

Tim:

Yeah, you've got a 70s like set room for like a porno eighties set room for a porno office situation.

Speaker 8:

Hey, did anyone pick up those cars? I gotta wait three months. I'm still waiting.

Tim:

And uh in this in the sunken bathtub and Oh, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 8:

Oh, yeah, that's a total porn scene. You can rent it to a porn company. That's wild. Dude, that I'm I'm telling you where it's at. Great property, very cheap.

Tim:

I drove over there the other day and um because we I was uh I was um at uh Fire Station 6 and I was like, man, that's right down the street. We were actually on the hunt for uh a certain energy drink, and I couldn't find what I wanted, but I did swing by and I was like, hmm, I didn't see your truck.

Speaker 8:

Oh no, I'm still at the other s other spot. We already it's closed. We're already you know, we gotta wait three months.

Tim:

No, no, no, I didn't see your truck at at at uh at on Whitmore at quality.

Speaker 8:

Oh, I was probably having lunch. It was in the morning.

Tim:

It's like two we two blocks away from your current spot, right? Oh, was it Friday? Or Thursday? I don't remember.

Speaker 8:

I had to take Tara's car to fix it, so I had to Yeah.

Tim:

I was gonna I was gonna I was gonna say stop by, say hi, but you know. I was there. You uh you weren't?

First Episode Chad:

So are y'all gonna replace the old shop with the new shop? Well, so we need an expansion.

Speaker 8:

Uh somewhat. So we you know we own the back end of the property. The other end that we lease, like my dad's been working out of there for 40 years. And so that person's not gonna sell. They actually want to convert everything into like um a restaurant spot location, and they want to use our property as a parking lot. So we're not gonna do that. Um we are going to probably move the dent operation over there to the new spot because it's so many bays. Yeah. They're leaving the lifts. Um so we'll see how that goes.

Tim:

They want to turn the spot into a restaurant.

Speaker 8:

Yeah. I mean, everything over there is gonna be turned into something like that eventually, for sure.

Tim:

So I'm except for your dad will be the loan. It'll be all these nice things. I'm not saying your building's not nice. I'm just gonna say it's gonna be all these like revamped nice things, and then it'll be like this this one shop.

Speaker 8:

Look, there are still houses over there um where we're at.

Tim:

You know, they're they're still it was an end of an era whenever the beer can house was torn out.

Speaker 8:

And I and you know, as a matter of fact, the guy who still works at that place that we that he bought, I mean not we, not my money, um, that he bought, uh still remember he knows all the guy, all the old heads that had their shops around the area. Yeah. So it's still cool to talk to the guy, and they still go to Angelo's and you know, still whatever.

Tim:

They just but it's good expand, you know. It would be it's good. It's good, it's good for business, it's good for it's good for the the the pocket, the wallet.

Speaker 8:

One day I'm gonna take it over. I think this year honestly has been my most successful year when it comes to business. Hell yeah. And I'm very excited and I mean, obviously the videos that I've been posting of me fixing shit that I've never thought I'd fix, like taking a risk on myself, and um I used to turn that shit away. I used to turn shit away because I was like, I can't fix that. I'm sorry, I can't fix it. And finally, like, you know, I was just learning and watching videos and how to do more shit, more beat up shit. Well, you just use Bondo. Not fuck you! No, no Bondo, bitch. Um but it's uh it's a process.

Tim:

Just slather that shit on there and sand it down and repaint. It looks good.

Speaker 8:

I fixed a big a fucking big ding on a goddamn jag. I charged the guy 300 bucks and uh he left it. It took me like an hour to do.

Tim:

I mean, it's $300 in an hour is pretty good.

Speaker 8:

That's dude. And then all the cars that I've worked on so far this year, because you know, my dad, we we have a shop in Burleson. He's been working over there, and it's just back and forth. But, dude, I'm doing all this shit and I'm proud of what I'm doing. I'm very happy.

Chad:

Hell yeah.

Speaker 8:

Um yeah, yeah, Hervey, look, how Javi cancel all his OF subscriptions. He might he's making bank now. I did.

Tim:

I know. I got rid of all that. So um, if I if I swing by the shop and I see your dad, can I walk in and and ask where where where's your lazy ass son at?

Speaker 8:

Yeah. He might laugh, but then he might get upset.

Tim:

He might get upset.

Speaker 8:

You know that old softy.

Tim:

I know he He he talks a I think he talks a tough game, but at the end of the day, at the end of the day, you're his son. And if somebody if somebody fucks fucks with his son. Whoa, whoa!

Speaker 8:

Hey, nobody fucking this. If somebody fucks his son I did get rocket money, by the way, yes. Yeah. Yeah, no. Yeah, I mean, yeah, you know, it's the same thing. Somebody was talking shit about Gil and you know, he fired him.

Tim:

Oh, we have to talk about shit. We talk shit about Gil all the time.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, we do. He's my brother, though. So Gil's good people. Gil's good people. He's good. He's a good big brother. He's decent. He's a good big brother. Uh, do you uh fix the interior of the door that's got the window jammed?

Javier:

Um I don't.

Speaker 8:

I gotta take a look at it. Let me take a look at it. Yeah, but I need to cancel all that stuff. Um saving all my I'm saving money. Uh I mean, obviously I paid off credit cards. Yeah, that's awesome.

Tim:

So um I didn't have okay.

Speaker 8:

And I am looking at uh wrecked cars so I can fix it.

Tim:

This is a controversial. This is a controversial thing that I that that a lot of people say is not a good idea to do, but I did it.

Speaker 8:

Butt sex.

Tim:

No. Um I did not contribute into a retirement that long um because I couldn't afford it up until about four ish four or five years ago. Yeah. Um I since uh cashed out since we switched over, I I I cashed out all my retirement to pay off all my debt to start basically fresh. And some people say like that's the biggest mistake you can do, right? But by just simply doing I still have money left over to reinvest. I didn't I didn't waste all that money, right?

Speaker 8:

I wouldn't say it's a waste.

Tim:

I mean it's I didn't well all that money, but I can take that you know, whatever I've got left over and and and reinvest it, and I'm gonna put it into a you know Roth, you know, IRA type thing and do that stuff. But what I'm saying is just by paying off like simple credit cards with that money, jump my credit score up like substantially. And I think it was a smart thing, but people talk so much shit about I I could see it like if I if I cash out like a hundred thousand dollars, I think your situation's different because you you you own a home.

First Episode Chad:

Most people do not fully own their home. Sure. I mean you have investments.

Tim:

I've got a little I've got a little mortgage, but it's not much.

First Episode Chad:

But it's not, you know, what most people have. Like it's not gonna be what I have. You know what I mean? Like you're you're kind of ahead in a little bit in just a different way. So fuck what people say. Do what you gotta do.

Tim:

But I I am happy, I am happy I did that because with this uh with this transition into my new organization, everything, I didn't know exactly how much money I'd be bringing in and all that. And I can tell you it sucks whenever you don't work overtime.

Speaker 8:

So um Is your new organization gonna be called Temco?

Tim:

Yeah. So I've I've got to come up with uh that's the whole thing with like the you know rental properties and things like that, is we just gotta I gotta figure out some other source of income coming in to just help sustain life and give me a s give me a place you know for retirement. So the long-term goal. The long-term goal is basically starting this year is buying a house every year for rental for at least the next five years.

Chad:

Yeah.

Tim:

But possibly after year five, push it into commercial property and then going from there. I want to own I want to own a laundromat. Yeah, laundromat would be cool. I want to do a laundromat. I want to maybe I thought about uh self-storage, you know. Self-storage, parking lots, laundromat. I never thought about a parking lot.

Speaker 8:

Frankie Muniz for Malcolm in the Middle Fame, like he has a bunch of parking lots in front of Staple Center. Imagine how much money he's getting from. Oh, that's a lot, man. That's a lot of money. Look at us. Five years ago, we were talking about titties and parking lots gotta be the most simple.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, it is. You don't touch it, you don't do anything. You just gotta get the pay someone to go clean up like the shit and the glass that people leave there.

Tim:

Yeah, but you get the but you get like the you get the kiosk, whatever, for payment, and you set up a contract with a token towing company. Yeah.

Speaker 8:

Speaking of kiosk, did you see the taco kiosk over there on 7th Street? No. I haven't been on 7th Street in a minute. Me neither. I just saw it on like What's a taco kiosk? It's uh, well, I guess a taco vending machine. Like you order a taco and then you know, being taco comes out. Nice.

First Episode Chad:

I mean, it's not all robotic, they gotta be like cooking it, right? Yeah, they're cooking it, but it's a good gimmick. Yeah, it's really pretty cool. It's pretty smart.

Speaker 8:

Nice. Also, man, um, vending machines are a good thing to invest in, also. Are they though?

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, I mean, because I dude Pokemon card vending machines. Dude, Pokemon cards blowing the book.

Tim:

Did you see a little fancy fancy boy?

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, I so they're really they're really hard to get these days. Like it's everyone's scalping, kind of like back when you and I collected four or five years ago. They're doing the same shit, and so it's like impossible to find stuff out in the wild. Um, but Andrew went to Target and he found me a few things and I was like, all right, and gave him money for it. And I haven't had the chance to open them, but when we got to the new house, I'm like, fuck it. Like, I'm exhausted. I'm gonna open shit some shit up. Yeah, got me like one of those.

Tim:

Because that's what I do whenever I'm exhausted. Dude. Yeah, yeah. I'm just like, man, I'm so tired.

Speaker 8:

Dude, it's like the best and kind of gambling. They had digital medics at uh Sam's Club today.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, my mom went and got me.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, uh Anthony saw her there.

Chad:

Yeah, yeah. Did you go? No, he told me, hey, go over there right now.

Speaker 8:

I'm like, bitch, I'm working. Right.

Chad:

Like, I gotta work, man. I'm sorry.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah, he was just as excited because you can't find that shit anywhere anymore.

Tim:

So in Vegas, they've got those machines where you could like, it's you pay 150 bucks and you get something that's either worth 150 to 180 dollars, like in a card or whatever. Um, I mean that you're at least- I mean, it's gonna be much low.

First Episode Chad:

Like, you're gonna have lows of like 50 bucks and then highs of like 500 dollars.

Tim:

Well, no, but I'm saying like like they they there was there's different categories. I saw this guy buy something, he was like, okay, so this one is like this thing's either worth 150, so you put 150 in, you're gonna get a hundred fifty a hundred fifty dollar card. Yeah. Right, worth worth that, or up to like a hundred and eighty, yeah, is what this price range was. And he got it, it was 180. Um but I can't remember who it was, but it was it was a sports card. It was signed. Looked it up around the spot. It was already graded and everything, so they know they sent them off and get graded. That's kind of a cool business idea.

Speaker 8:

Did you see the one I sent, the one with Babe Ruth, uh, Michael Jordan, Tom Brady?

First Episode Chad:

Yeah. Like the the goats. It wasn't a card, right? It was the the guy that got it signed or something like that, or no? It was uh card. How did you get Babe Ruth to sign it? He's been dead. Like a like a piece of paper or a leather. A piece of leather, yeah. He had all of the goats sign it. It was yeah, it was wild. Yeah.

unknown:

Yeah.

First Episode Chad:

On a piece of leather? Yeah. Yeah, it's like this this thing. I don't know. It probably, honestly, like obviously the guys never met Babe Ruth. It was probably something Babe Ruth signed, and then he bought, and then he had Michael Jordan, Tom Brady, and who was the other one? I don't know. Michael Michael Michael B. Jordan. No, Micah Parsons. We got basketball, we got football, baseball. What are we missing? It wasn't hockey, I don't think. I don't know. There was four of the goats. Like it was a big deal. It was was it soccer? I don't think it was soccer.

Speaker 8:

Was it oh no? Oh no, no, no, no. What messy?

First Episode Chad:

I don't know. But he got like four signatures and he was like done. He wanted to get the four goats on this thing, and then I think he's probably gonna get it graded or framed.

Speaker 8:

It was at a card show, too.

First Episode Chad:

Yeah.

Speaker 8:

So he could have just gotten it graded over there.

Tim:

Yeah. It was a one-of-a-kind. That's a crazy thing to just have. I've got this random piece of leather that all these random, you know, goats have signed.

Speaker 8:

There was a um Kobe LeBron.

Tim:

Larry Bird, that's what it was. He got a signature from Larry Bird.

Speaker 8:

Kobe LeBron, Michael Jordan patch. OJ Bronze Patches. O.J. Simpson? I think it sold for like five million dollars.

First Episode Chad:

It was three million? I want to say it was 1.4. And it was like that Kevin O'Leary guy, wasn't it? It was the he he was one of the three owners of this.

Tim:

I don't know if Jamie is telling us this, but it's a she says O.J. Simpson. No!

Speaker 8:

Butter Butterbean autograph is going hot.

Tim:

Butter pee.

Speaker 8:

Old Butterbean.

Tim:

Alright, so I mean that's pretty much covers this whole episode. Does it really? Because hold on. We've been at it for a long time.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, he's right. But hold on. Hold that thought.

Tim:

P before we leave. Okay. We could just sign off and leave. So he's got a pee first. I don't understand him sometimes. I never understand. We've never understood Javier. Neither one of them. But we love each other. I've understood myself. Well. Well. Never understood you. I'm I'm pretty easy. I don't know. Never understood Javier either. No, that's that's I mean, that's why he's the wild card. Yeah, so uh you you're enjoying the new house and everything. Dude, I love it. I'm gonna just tell you that the dates that you keep picking for things are the biggest inconvenience for me. Okay. Because they're always on like, okay, so your wedding? Yeah. Just started, just just transferred over into uh the city of Fort Worth. Right. Didn't know what my how my schedule's gonna be, or if I can even use my vacation time. Alright. Your your wedding party. Yeah. I'm working. Okay. You're uh you're let's go soak in the pool. Yeah. Working. Yeah. You moved it for you're you're moving it out. But you're also moving it up. Yeah, which I'm working. Right.

First Episode Chad:

Look, all I gotta say is be a better friend. I'm working. Be be there for the people that are.

Tim:

I'm working.

First Episode Chad:

I know, I get it. It's all good.

Tim:

I gotta I gotta make money. You're just uh, you know, everybody's gotta get on my schedule, and that's just how it's gonna be.

First Episode Chad:

Dude, I still don't know your schedule. Like, I have no idea. I know that you work every day opposite weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So like one week you got Tuesday and something off, and the next week you got Wednesday and something off.

Tim:

So I've also I was off uh Monday, Tuesday, work Wednesday, Thursday, I'm off Friday, Saturday, Sunday. And then I'm on Monday, Tuesday, off Wednesday, Thursday, work, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Cool. Yeah. So literally the opposite days week to week. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it just it just it's a rotating schedule. Yeah, I know. It's it's still open back there. I gotta I gotta put stuff up. Thank you, though.

unknown:

Alright.

Tim:

Okay, you're back. So now you've peed. Final thoughts. This is final thoughts.

Speaker 8:

We did final thoughts before, remember, or it was like uh what really grinds my gears are jingles my jangles or I don't know.

Tim:

Um Fort Worth's got a Zaxby's that's coming to talk about.

Speaker 8:

Oh yeah, yeah.

Tim:

That's my final thought on that.

Speaker 8:

So, Chad, what what what are you gonna miss about uh did we already say that? What are you what are you gonna miss about being on the show?

Tim:

I don't know what this music is, but we're gonna find out. Oh, that's Javier's ad. Never mind. Keep going.

Speaker 8:

Uh what what are you gonna miss most about you know being on the show?

First Episode Chad:

Um getting to shoot the shit with you guys and just I don't know, talk. Talk. I don't know. Like it's been it's been a fun ride. I think that just hanging out with y'all, hopefully uh we can still hang out as buds. Uh but you know, hanging out and then meeting all the people. It's been great.

Speaker 8:

Well, you know, I mean, hopefully, if we're lucky enough, we'll still have events and do things and meet people and uh I guess we just, you know, gotta butter my biscuits. That's what it was. Thank you. Thank you, Herv. Um Yeah, no, I think uh you you were like truly a voice with the podcast. I think uh I think Chad might revoke Chad's I think I might revoke Chad's Mexican citizens.

First Episode Chad:

You don't have the power. Good luck, Hervey, motherfucker.

Speaker 8:

Yeah, there's you gotta have a majority vote, and I don't think you can besides we we already gave up too much.

Tim:

They're bringing up Mundo.

Speaker 8:

Remember Chase said that his cousin we would have traded, or we would have traded Chase's cousin. We would have traded Chase for his cousin with the shit. That guy was hilarious. And a more handsome man, too. He's he's a he's a god. He really was. Absolutely sorry, Chase.

Tim:

Um You could tell they're related though, right?

Speaker 8:

Oh you had me at that. Never mind. Um, I I I think you were you were uh uh voice for the podcast, and you know, you you were pretty much the only thing that tethered everything together. So um yeah, it's it sucks, but you know, this is a fucking depressing guess. Sorry. Uh Chindlers is kind of music. Chindler's doesn't music. No, I I you know it's it's it sucks. Sorry. I'm sorry to say that. Is he gonna change the rap now? Okay. Uh yeah, no, it sucks. And you know, obviously we're still gonna hang out and get together, and uh it's so hard to stay good. That medicine's not working. They tell you not to drink when you're on the pills. Yeah, I'm gonna miss you. It's gonna be, you know, shitty, but you know. You know, you're you're doing the right thing, and uh, you know, it's gonna suck without you. That's all I gotta say about that.

First Episode Chad:

Thanks, man.

Tim:

It is gonna suck being without you. But it doesn't mean it's the end. It's never the end. No. We're gonna be in our 70s and the show's still gonna be going somehow. Right. I had a gun in my mouth if you could.

Speaker 8:

Come back as a celebrity guest.

Tim:

You know, no caffeine too, you're right. I'm gonna be uh, yeah, we're gonna be holding a gun in your mouth to make you come back.

Speaker 8:

Hey, look. Um yeah. Yeah.

Tim:

Okay. Alright. Love you guys. Enough of that. Uh, so uh let me uh let me just uh let me find that little outro there. There it is.

First Episode Chad:

Alright, I found it. Alright, everybody, if you don't already do so, please make sure you follow the funky panther. At the Funky Panther. All things social media. You know, if you want to go find me at GoCad Go, you can, because I won't be here anymore.

Tim:

Or if you just want to like track him down and you see a uh random vehicle that has no, I'm not gonna give you a game. Ghosty Go! If you see Ghosty Go on the back of a forerunner, uh just go ahead and throw eggs at it.

Speaker 8:

Or uh follow trace production. Is that still still up?

Tim:

It's not a thing. No. No. I mean it could be, but.

First Episode Chad:

But love you all. Love uh you guys. You guys are the fucking best. Can't wait to see what you're gonna do with the show. Stay good, everybody. I'm Chad. I'm Javier. And I'm Tim. And we are the Fucky Panther. Adios.

Sound drop:

Goodbye, stranger. It's been done. Can you see you? All the blue.

unknown:

All the blue. Goodbye.

Sound drop:

Will we never be a king?

Outro song:

Just keep the motion. Every day.

Head Shot

Javier

Host
Contributor

Antoine

Co-host
Head Shot

Chad

Co-host
Contributor

Lance

Co-host
Head Shot

Tim

Producer

Podcasts we love

Check out these other fine podcasts recommended by us, not an algorithm.

Corks In Cowtown Artwork

Corks In Cowtown

corksincowtown
Tales From The Fort Artwork

Tales From The Fort

Jarrod Johannesen
Forever Reckless Artwork

Forever Reckless

ForeverReckless
My First Million Artwork

My First Million

Hubspot Media
KILL TONY Artwork

KILL TONY

DEATHSQUAD.TV & Studio71
Bad Friends Artwork

Bad Friends

Bobby Lee & Andrew Santino
The Jerry Jonestown Massacre Artwork

The Jerry Jonestown Massacre

Matt Stubbs, Dustin Schneider