My Inner Torch
My Inner Torch offers direct and personal insight with help for those of us in a relationship with someone who is undiagnosed/diagnosed with a Cluster B Personality Disorder. This is a safe place to come for words of inspiration that draw from my personal experiences and is produced to gain understanding and to find direction as we navigate through the often difficult relationships with those we love who suffer with a Cluster B personality disorder that includes BPD and NPD. PLEASE NOTE: This podcast is NOT for those who suffer with these disorders. This podcast is for survivors of these challenging and difficult relationships.
My Inner Torch
Do THEY Care?
🎯 Key Takeaways
Core Points:
- I recognize that Cluster B personalities often create narratives where they are the victims.
- I won’t get drawn into arguments; I’ll maintain a neutral stance.
- I’m reclaiming my identity; I’m stopping prioritizing their emotional needs above my own.
- I understand that Cluster B individuals may lack the capacity for genuine care.
- Healing is crucial before leaving a relationship; it prevents me from returning to the abuser.
- I’m identifying and breaking free from the cycle of emotional enmeshment.
🔍 Summary
Understanding Cluster B Personalities and Their Narratives
I’m discussing the challenges of relationships with Cluster B individuals, emphasizing how I used to immerse myself in their emotional turmoil while neglecting my own well-being. I’ve found it difficult to recognize this pattern and break free from it. A key insight I’ve gained is that Cluster B individuals often create narratives where they are the victim, blaming others for their problems.
Recognizing and Responding to Manipulation
I recall a specific example: a text message from my wife stating irritation without explanation. Previously, I would have engaged in a defensive argument. However, now, I recognize this as manipulation—a “thought grenade” designed to instigate conflict. I’ve learned to maintain emotional neutrality in such situations.
Reclaiming My Identity and Healing
The core message for me is the importance of reclaiming my identity. I’ve spent years losing my sense of self in an effort to please my partner. I now highlight the importance of recognizing the unhealthy dynamic and setting boundaries to prevent further emotional damage. I’ve come to understand that a crucial step is recognizing that these individuals may lack the capacity for genuine care.
The Importance of Healing Before Leaving
I stress the importance of healing before leaving a relationship with a Cluster B personality. I know that leaving without addressing my own emotional needs can lead to returning to the abuser due to unresolved issues. I’m encouraging myself to practice self-care and develop healthy coping mechanisms as preparation for a potential separation.