Men Rising From Divorce - A Rising Phoenix Podcast
A podcast for men going through an unwanted divorce or breakup.
Men Rising From Divorce - A Rising Phoenix Podcast
Episode 216 - Unmasking High-Functioning Depression - Dr. Stacey Pinatelli
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You are still going to work. You are still paying the bills. You are still showing up for your kids. When people ask how you are handling the divorce, you say, "I'm just tired".
But behind closed doors, you are exhausted, numb, and running on fumes.
Today, we are talking about the depression that clinicians rarely discuss: High-Functioning Depression. My guest is Dr. Stacy, a clinical psychologist with extensive experience in the VA healthcare system specializing in trauma and PTSD. We discuss the critical difference between "classic" depression—which often looks like a total inability to function—and high-functioning depression, where a man might look successful and put-together on the outside but is falling apart on the inside.
We break down how men hide behind the role of "The Provider" or "The Helper" using extreme competence as a shield against feeling their grief. If your depression looks more like irritability, compulsive busyness, and an absolute fear of sitting in silence, this episode is going to change how you view your mental health.
In this episode, we cover:
- The "I'm Fine" Trap: Why high-functioning depression is so easy to miss, and how the people around you might take your "strength" at face value.
- Symptoms in Disguise: Why depression often manifests as being reactive and snapping at people, or filling your schedule with compulsive busyness so you don't have to face the quiet.
- The First Step Out: Why you don't need a massive five-step plan to fix yourself; you just need to say one honest sentence to one person.
- The 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique: A practical, immediate tool using your five senses to stop the internal spiral and bring yourself back to the present moment.
- Functioning vs. Healing: Dr. Stacy's powerful reminder that just because you are handling your responsibilities doesn't mean you are actually processing your grief.
Guest Bio:Dr. Stacy recently completed her postdoctoral training in clinical psychology, focusing heavily on PTSD, trauma, and serious mental illness within the VA healthcare system. She is also the author of Hope and Healing for Survivors, available through New Harbinger and Amazon, and a regular contributor to Psychology Today.