When teasing turns toxic: scoffs & sarcasm- the slow drip of contempt

We all scoff. We all slip into sarcasm. 

But what if those “little” habits aren’t as harmless as they seem? Research from the Gottman Institute shows that contempt — often disguised as casual teasing — is the single strongest predictor of death to connection (aka: divorce)

Scoffing, sarcasm, and eye-rolling may feel small in the moment, but they send powerful messages of superiority, dismissal, and disrespect.

In this episode, we unpack how these micro-habits of contempt impact the brain, erode safety, and poison connection in marriage. You’ll hear real-life examples of how scoffing and sarcasm sneak into everyday conversations, what’s really hiding underneath those jabs (hint: it’s often unspoken pain), and practical ways to replace contempt with curiosity and vulnerability.

If you’ve ever said, “Oh, we’re just teasing,” this episode will help you see why even a few “drops of poison” can contaminate the well of your relationship — and how to choose a healthier, more life-giving way forward.

We are giving you a 30 day Challenge: Weed out scoffing & sarcasm from your dialogue. See what a difference it makes. (Remember: don't use this challenge to start tallying how often your partner uses them- mind your half of the yard only :)

Get my Habit Reboot E-Course!