Sober Vibes Podcast

How NA Drinks Help in Sobriety w/ Deb Podlogar

Courtney Andersen/Deb Podlogar Season 6 Episode 209

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Episode 209: How NA Drinks Help in Sobriety w/ Deb Podlogar

In episode 209 of the Sober Vibes podcast, Courtney Andersen welcomes Deb Podlogar to the show. The ladies discuss the transformative role of mocktails in the journey towards sobriety.

Deb, the Mocktail Mom, shares her accidental path to sobriety and how creating mocktails became an essential and enjoyable part of her life. She also discusses the societal impacts of alcohol consumption, particularly for mothers.

Deb Podlogar hosts the Thriving Alcohol-Free with Mocktail Mom podcast and is the author of The Happiest Hour: Delicious Mocktails for a Fabulous Moms' Night In Mocktail recipe book.

What you will learn in this episode:

  • Deb discusses her transition from wine to mocktails 
  • The significance of mocktails as a tool for those in sobriety 
  • Insights into Deb's acclaimed mocktail recipe book 
  • Tackling triggers and mindful drinking approaches 

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Courtney Andersen:

Hey, welcome back to the Sober Vibes podcast. I am your host, courtney Anderson. I'm a sober coach, author of the Sober Vibes, a guide to thriving in your first three months without alcohol, and your go-to guide for navigating life without booze. Now it does get better. It really does. It gets better. It takes some time. Those first couple months are not all that fun, I will tell you that. But because there's a lot of learning new behaviors, getting out of that habit. There's some post-acute withdrawal syndrome. There's a lot okay, raw emotions. You're vulnerable. I will always tell you how it is and be truthful with you. But those first couple months, that first year, is trying because you're learning how to relive in an adult body, feeling like a newborn child. It's wild. It is wild. So for the newbies, for the new good people of the world, thank you for joining today. Make sure that you subscribe or follow whatever app you're on to listen to your podcast, that you follow along. That way you never miss an episode.

Courtney Andersen:

I have a great guest on today, deb Polliger. She's a real one. She's also known as the Mocktail Mom. Deb hosts the Thriving Alcohol Free with Mocktail Mom and she just became an author a couple months ago to the book. It's a mocktail recipe book. It's called the Happiest Hour Delicious Mocktails for a Fabulous Night In.

Courtney Andersen:

I got to say a couple things about this book. You'll hear me talk more about it in the podcast, but it honestly like this book. This book is legit and this book is good. It's colorful I love the colors in it. It really makes everything pop. How she has the recipes all laid out and telling you in the beginning all what you need for anything.

Courtney Andersen:

As a person who was once a bartender, this book really should be behind bars. If you have a restaurant or if you once a bartender, this book really should be behind bars. If you have a restaurant or if you are a bartender, get this book. So then that way, people, bartenders, staff they know how to make mocktails. This is important in 2025 and going further in life. Okay, I get it that the mom is in the title, which is all good, but this is really, as somebody who was once in the industry, this is a great recipe book to have behind that bar, because I believe and know, as what we have seen in the last couple of years, more and more and more people are going to want alcohol-free options. This is facts. This is facts. Okay, so grab this book.

Courtney Andersen:

Deb and I have a great conversation. We really talk about how NAs non-alcoholic beverages, non-alcoholic beers, wines, mocktails right can help people stay sober and if it's a good tool for them to use or when they should start incorporating it in that and I will always say this as my disclaimer because I've been saying it for a long time If mocktails and any beers and all that trigger you, then don't drink them, okay. But also keep continuing to listen to this episode, because Deb's got a great story and it's just perspective of hearing somebody else's story and anything that you can take from somebody else's story and incorporate it into your life or listen to it and be like, oh, that was a very inspiring. You know all that jazz, as I hope that any of you do and take away from these episodes with guests, because she's got a good story. You know she was a daily charting aid ringer and now she's not, so learn how she did it. All right, enjoy this episode.

Courtney Andersen:

Make sure too, if you are wanting more content from the Sober Vibes podcast, to join my new Patreon. You can find the link below. I will also put the link below with Deb's information and how to get a copy of her book. Also, too, if you need help in your sobriety journey and looking for more with coaching, with one-on-one coaching the link is in the show notes to apply to work with me. And then there's also my sobriety circle, which is a group coaching program. As always, keep kicking ass, keep on trucking and enjoy today's episode. Hey Deb, welcome to the Sober Vibes podcast. I'm so glad you're here. Last time we spoke I was on your podcast, so it's been a while.

Deb Podlagar:

It's been a long time. I'm so happy to see you. We're both drinking our hot drinks today. Cheers to you, my friend. Yes, cheers. Happy one-year anniversary to your book.

Courtney Andersen:

Thank Happy one year anniversary to your book, Thank you. Thank you and congrats on your book that just came out. That came out in what?

Deb Podlagar:

November. Excuse me, it came out November 5th. It came out on election day, which I thought was so appropriate because you know, America maybe wanted to drink on election day. So my mocktail book came out on November 5th. It was very fun.

Courtney Andersen:

Good day for it to come out, yeah, yeah, out on November 5th. It was very fun, good day for it to come out. Yeah, yeah, and I told you before and I shared this with my Sobriety Circle members too but your book is so pretty. Oh, thank you, it's so, it's fun, and, as I told you from a ex-bartender how that was all from the start, with telling people what they needed right and explaining what a shaker or the stirrer was, that is a book that can actually be used for bartenders when it comes to mocktails. Thank, you.

Courtney Andersen:

So if you are listening and you're in the service industry, if you're manager of a restaurant or whatnot, buy this book, because it has so many mocktail recipes.

Deb Podlagar:

I appreciate that, Courtney. Okay, so when the Happiest Hour was coming out, I was actually most nervous probably for like a bartender or a mixologist to look at it, because I was like I'm not, I didn't work in a, I haven't worked as a bartender or anything, and I just felt like oh, they're going to look at it and be like oh, wah, wah, and I'm like I'm so happy to hear that. So, thank you, I really. You know, I wrote it for everybody. So good to hear that that it would be useful for somebody who's working behind a bar.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, Because the mocktails are for everybody, whether you're, you know, drinking and maybe you're having mocktails in between. You know, yeah, and they're for everybody, but they're not out in where it is. There's not a mocktail menu at every establishment that you go through, right, like same thing. There's not a drink menu at a lot of places. And the place that I worked with it was worked at, it was so established for so many years and it was a family owned place. It was like the best way I could describe it was a cheers and we never we never did drink menus. Okay so, and it was like if somebody randomly was like, oh, I want this drink because not every bartender knows how to make everything and going to that bartender school is just a waste of money, I have to tell you that.

Deb Podlagar:

Okay, okay, good, I never went. Yeah, save my money yeah.

Courtney Andersen:

And so To have a book, like we had this book behind the bar. So that's what I'm saying your book could be used of that of here. When somebody is like, hey, can you make me a mocktail, because now it is so common that you can just pick something out of your book and there you go.

Deb Podlagar:

Recipes have non-alcoholic spirits. Some do not. Many have non-alcoholic spirits included, which for me, I didn't know. There was such a thing as non-alcoholic tequila, non-alcoholic whiskey, non-alcoholic gin you can make a gin and tonic and it's delicious and there's no alcohol. So, yeah, it's joining the mocktail space or becoming alcohol-free. When I stopped drinking kind of became accidentally sober. It has been wonderful to find all these options, so many good things to drink.

Courtney Andersen:

And I do have to say on that other, I don't know if you've heard this, but my husband and I it was last year for our anniversary we went out to dinner and it was kind of more of an upscale place and we asked the server. We're like, do you have mocktails? And because I saw behind the bar that they had some NA spirits and so she was like, yeah, let me go get the bartender and the bartender can tell you what she makes.

Courtney Andersen:

So the bartender comes over and she starts explaining to us that now reps from these companies are starting to come to the bars to teach them how to make mocktails. Wow, wow, yes For me it gave me a lady boner of excitement, just to be like dude. That's awesome that companies are doing this. And she was telling us she was like sometimes we have more in sales on these mocktail drinks than we do off of our regular drink menu.

Deb Podlagar:

I'm not surprised. I'm not surprised. I mean, the tide is turning, culture is turning and even if somebody is still drinking you know, I learned a term this year on my podcast a zebra stripe drinker. I never heard that before.

Courtney Andersen:

Oh, I have not heard that either.

Deb Podlagar:

I never heard that. So it's maybe somebody who goes out, maybe they're out with their friends or whatever. Maybe they have a cocktail, then they have a mocktail. Maybe they'll have a cocktail again. Maybe they're not totally sober but they don't want to always be drinking cocktails, so they'll kind of break it up. Maybe they start with mocktails, have a cocktail in between.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, yeah, yeah Well, so how did you become accidentally sober?

Deb Podlagar:

I love that I was, very accidentally, sober Wine just started having a bigger place in my life. It kind of helped numb a lot of pain that I went through in my 40s divorce, breast cancer, both of my parents passed away from dementia and Alzheimer's, and so there was like a lot of really hard things that happened within like a six-year period in my 40s and wine just became more and more. You know my BFF to help numb the pain and just kind of zone me out in the evening, relax chillax mom. And as I was approaching my 50th birthday I was going to turn 50 in 2021.

Deb Podlagar:

I was like I don't want to live the next decade the way I've just lived the last. So I just wanted to take a break. I didn't and never intended to become sober. That word sober scared the heck out of me. I would never, never have said I want to be sober. I just want to be able to moderate. I want to be able to moderate. I want to be able to have a glass of wine and not be thinking about the next.

Deb Podlagar:

I know how I had been drinking wine in my 30s you know it didn't really have a big place in my life but took a break. January 2021 was my first full month alcohol-free. My very first day actually was New Year's Eve, 2020. The very last day of 2020 was my first day without any alcohol and by the end of the month I just was feeling so much better end of January that I was like, let me set another goal, like okay, I made it a month, let me set another goal, maybe I can make it like 100 days. And that felt like I didn't even think I'd make it to the first weekend, like I didn't think there was any way I was going to stop drinking. So it just kept going and it just kept going and going and going and now it's like I don't even know how many days coming up on four years which, by the time this comes out, it'll be the past four years, which is insane.

Deb Podlagar:

Wine had such a big role in my life and I woke up so many mornings with shame and just feeling like I did it again. I said I was going to have one glass of wine and then there's the empty bottle on my counter. So to be free of. That is incredible, and I really didn't think there'd be anything to drink and I didn't think there'd be any fun left. So finding mocktails really helped me and non-alcoholic wines and non-alcoholic beers. It was like the bumper rails of my sobriety my accidental sobriety, because it gave me something to still drink in the evening. I could still sit and watch. I wanted to have something to drink. I wanted to, you know, have a little. I needed a hobby. I was kind of bored in the evening. I wasn't zoned out. I didn't want to do coloring pages, I didn't want to do puzzles. So I started making mocktails and then I just started sharing it on Instagram and that's kind of how Mocktail Mom started.

Courtney Andersen:

I love it. I love it. When, though, you quit drinking? During that time did you have to find yourself going through another type of grieving process from the loss of your parents? Because I am a firm believer that you can't really go through a full grieving process when you are numbing your senses like that, or, you know, over drinking because you're not properly feeling it right, Like sometimes. That ugly cry after a bottle of two of wine really doesn't become about the loss of the parents, but more of like or loss of anybody, I should say more of just how you know. It becomes a little bit more drawn out, and I can only.

Courtney Andersen:

I mean, I used to do that Like my ugly cries hammered really was just more about internally and of how I was feeling about myself and maybe more of a pity party. So did you have to go through a new grieving process from your parents? Good question.

Deb Podlagar:

I feel like I had never heard this is a term I learned early, maybe that first year of sobriety was becoming emotionally sober and that first fall my parents both passed away in the fall and so when the fall came around, it was like that season of like all you know the memories of being with them at that time of year and stuff, and it was a new grieving process because I wasn't drinking. I mean, it was very different, that first year of like really feeling like they are really not here. You know, I take a picture and I want to send it to my mom and she's not here, you know. So, yeah, very, very different to grieve or to go through something really hard, anything hard, and not be numbing out because you're really experiencing it, and I think that's I don't know if that's like an official term or just something I heard, but it's like emotionally sober. Is that a term that?

Deb Podlagar:

people use yeah Emotional sobriety, okay yeah, emotional sobriety. So.

Courtney Andersen:

Which, like emotional sobriety, from just my point of view, is people after like that year and you were working on that right Like closer to that year is when you do like okay, that first year is just kind of all about just not drinking right. And then after that then it's like oh, now I have to figure out really what to do with all of these emotions, because for so long we suppressed it. So, yeah, that timeline seems about accurate of when then you're like oh, I got to tap into this.

Courtney Andersen:

And then you're like oh, I got to tap into this. So did you start drinking mocktails and NAs right off the bat? Or was this something that you even did? You even know about mocktails Because around that time you got sober, that's with more of the mocktails started to rise up, starting.

Deb Podlagar:

So, ironically, okay, this is I don't keep. This has to do with the story. I do not keep any receipts. Like I walk out of Costco, I crumple up my receipt, I throw it in the trash can Like I don't bring home receipts. My husband has a receipt, probably from 1982, in the basement, like he keeps everything Me. No, for whatever reason.

Deb Podlagar:

On December 31st 2020, that very first day, I went into Total Wine, where I used to buy all my Kim Crawfords and Josh wines and stuff, and I went all the way to the back where they had non-alcoholic section. It was like I think one, like one shelf and they had non-alcoholic wine. And I remember thinking like what is the point of this? Like what is the point? Like what is the point? But I bought a bottle of non-alcoholic wine and I have the receipt. I found it. I was like, oh my gosh, 12-31-2020. I think it was Be Well, chardonnay is what I bought and I just wanted something. I wanted something and I just thought there has to be something that you can drink that isn't a Shirley Temple and isn't just iced tea. So yeah, so that first night I had some non-alcoholic white wine. I was like I want to drink something and it helped do you still have the receipt?

Courtney Andersen:

I still have it. Yeah, I know I should frame it, I should frame it.

Deb Podlagar:

I really should frame it. That's a good idea. You should frame it and put it up there. Yeah, I need to frame it. Okay, I will do that. Yes.

Courtney Andersen:

Because it's well, it's a great memory and then also, too, it was the start of something new for you, right In this new life and in your fifties, and just living life differently, as you stated.

Deb Podlagar:

Yeah, and I had no idea how my life was about to change Like I could never have imagined that only good was going to come into my life by putting alcohol away.

Courtney Andersen:

I had no idea.

Deb Podlagar:

I thought I was going to be losing so much.

Courtney Andersen:

Right, and yet it's really. It's more of the mindset of what you're actually gaining, yep, so because a lot of people think like that.

Courtney Andersen:

It because it is set up. If you looked at it, because of how the reward system with alcohol is so heavy, it becomes a reward system. It's very glamorized, it's very romanticized in our society, and that's a lot of us, for all we know, and especially too, of how alcohol was talked about or used in their family right. So when you do quit it's like how am I going to have fun again? How?

Deb Podlagar:

am I going to?

Courtney Andersen:

live? How am I going to go to this wedding? How am I going to have sex again, right, like, how am I going to date without booze? So there's a lot of what ifs, but that's just the fear of doing something you've never done in your adult life. Yep, you know, and some people start drinking at such an earlier age and into their teens where it's like, well, yeah, you don't really know how to do this as an adult.

Deb Podlagar:

That's true. No, that's very true. Yeah, if you've been drinking since teenage years or 20s and you've only been an adult as a drinker, it's very daunting to think about. What's my life like without this? Yeah, but I was like okay, I did my 30s without alcohol having a big role. I can go back to that. I did have a good time in my 30s. You know, I'm like what is wrong with me?

Courtney Andersen:

Right right.

Courtney Andersen:

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Courtney Andersen:

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Deb Podlagar:

Mactails come into a play with helping you stay sober. One of the first. This was very beginning of 2020 or 2021. I went back to Total Wine and I bought. I bought a seed lip because I was like, well, maybe I'll try to make some drinks. And I bought ritual tequila alternative and I made a spicy margarita and I mean I bought like a mix of organic kind of margarita mix. I didn't even get out lime juice. I mean. I was just like I took a mix and I took a non-alcoholic tequila and made a mocktail and it had like that bite. You know, it had like that heat that I liked. You know, that I liked for my Chardonnay days and I was like, oh my gosh, like I just felt like it really changed everything for me.

Deb Podlagar:

That spicy margarita. I was like if I could drink this, why would I go back, like I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning without a hangover, without dragging around a U-Haul of shame, and you know I can continue on my journey, still have good things to drink. I was very surprised that there were still good things to drink. I didn't think there'd be anything good. I thought there'd only be Shirley Temples and actually the first time I went out. That was what somebody offered me when I asked for a mocktail.

Courtney Andersen:

But you know what, though? I think they're about to can that. I think they're finally putting it into cans, shirley Temples. Isn't that crazy? Yeah, I think they did. Yeah, okay, like, after all of these years that it's finally like you guys finally decided to put this in a can. Like, why didn't you do this years ago? I mean, you've been killing it, but it's funny because when I got sober in 2012, that first Christmas, that's where that was a little hard for me, and at the grocery store it was Sprite and cranberry juice.

Courtney Andersen:

Maybe, it was ginger ale and cranberry juice and I was like, all right, well, I'll just get this to drink Because I still like drinking things from pretty glasses, yeah, but I still had a couple of my wine glasses left and I drank that out. I drank that during the holiday season and, honestly, it helped so much.

Deb Podlagar:

Yeah, yeah you know what I mean. Yeah, oh yeah, and I think having a beautiful glass, even if it's just a sparkling water, you know, just put it in a pretty glass, maybe even get yourself some new glasses. Go to the consignment store, go to a thrift store. I found myself this beautiful coupe glass that I'll put a mocktail in and it feels so fancy, it feels elevated and it can be a really simple drink. The drink doesn't have to be fancy, but you feel like, oh, I'm having something special just because you have a fancy glass, and I don't have memories of drinking wine from that glass. It's like I'm making new memories with new glassware. That's helped, yeah.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, what would you say to a person that is wanting to dabble, wanting to try a mocktail, but they're scared that it's going to trigger them? I just, I'm going to say my disclosure yeah, Again, because there is. It's like because there's such big talk about this now and it's just like you know there's that fear and I think you, I know you have to walk through it first, but like, listen, if mocktails, you've tried them and they trigger you, then don't drink them. That's why I don't drink the wines. I can't do it to the wines because it still gets me in the back of the teeth where I was like, oh, this, this is too familiar, I can't do this. But like beers and the mocktails, I'm all about.

Deb Podlagar:

So what would? What would you say to somebody who wants to try but they're scared? I mean, I think you know just to be really aware. I mean I just think, like I do have people in my life, you know who. A wine would be a trigger. Non-alcoholic wine would be a trigger. So, figuring out what's right for you and maybe letting somebody know like, hey, I'm going to try this, you know, and I want to see if I like this.

Deb Podlagar:

But absolutely like, if it's a trigger, don't do it. Or you're really afraid it's going to, you know, pull you back into drinking, then don't try it Like there's. You don't have to. There's plenty of other things to drink. You know that don't have non-alcoholic spirits in it.

Deb Podlagar:

But I personally for me it has been, it has just helped me and carried me forward on my alcohol but if it would be a trigger or you're really, really worried about it, then don't, like there's. That would be how I feel. It's like, don't try it then. But I think you know, but if you're curious and you want to try it, you know, let somebody know. Or maybe just buy one bottle of non-alcoholic tequila, you know, you don't have to buy a whole bar set of you know to get every spirit, maybe try one, say like oh, I wasn't a tequila drinker, so like that's to. To me it's like it's kind of a whole new world, Gin, all that stuff. I was a wine drinker. Ironically for me, the wines are not a trigger. They are. They do help me. I probably drink more of the non-alcoholic wine than anything else.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, so when did Mocktail Mom, though? When did you start putting it on Instagram? When did you start that venture?

Deb Podlagar:

I started my Instagram on day 10 of my alcohol-free journey, so I was, yep, I was double digits.

Deb Podlagar:

And I was so bored in the evening and I was like, what can I do? And I don't know if you follow Gary Vaynerchuk, gary V, but he's a entrepreneur and stuff and you know he talks about. I actually have a book, or, sorry, I have a recipe named after in honor of him, called Taste and See with Gary V in my book, because you know his whole motto is like taste and see. If you're a writer, start a blog. See if you like it, do a side hustle, don't get so afraid. Just taste and see, try it. If you don't like it, you don't have to keep doing it. I felt like, okay, I like to goof around or whatever. I thought, well, maybe I can make videos and share with people these things I'm trying, these things I'm finding, because I was trying to figure out what to drink.

Deb Podlagar:

So day 10 is when I started Mocktail Mom on Instagram. Ironically, I love it and I didn't tell anybody. I didn't tell my husband. He didn't even know. I was trying to take a break because I was like, oh, my whole family's going to be like no, you're not going to be able to do that, you're the wine mom. And I didn't know anything about Instagram and I tagged my city on. One of my neighbors followed me and I remember like seeing you know you have a new follower or whatever and it's like jennifer nash and I was like she's gonna think I have a problem, like I was so nervous and I like block, delete, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And now, now I shot it from the rooftops. But in the beginning I felt very, I felt ashamed that I was even evaluating my relationship with alcohol.

Courtney Andersen:

So so what do you think that was about, though? Because there is, there is women who do feel like that, you know, and of course, I respect be private if you need to be private, but what do you think that shame was about?

Deb Podlagar:

I think it's that I grew up where you were either a normal drinker or you had a problem all capital letters and I felt that way, and I know my husband feels that way, or probably still even, and it's like he doesn't. I don't think quite totally understand the gray area drinking and I had no idea that there was this whole space of gray area drinking that a lot of us get lost in. So, yeah, I was very afraid people were going to think I had a huge problem or I'd had a big rock bottom, or you know, I just had tons of little rock bottoms every morning. Going like this is not who I am. This is not who I am.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, well, and there's another thing of that's how it was portrayed for many, many, many, many, many, many years. That's how it's been portrayed in the media. That's, you know, if you were a bottom of the barrel alcoholic, you lived under a bridge. How could you have gotten there? Right? And there's so many things now where it's still that we're in 2024. And, yes, there's a lot of awareness, but it's still. There's still a stigma around the drinking, about drinking if you have a drinking issue. And now there's alcohol use disorder. So it's just like you know from from how I see it, it's just like, again, millions have been affected, millions for decades. So it's not the person, it's the substance. Right, you're right? Yep, it's the substance. It's like, again, this is just such a highly addictive substance that is glamorized.

Deb Podlagar:

Right, right, right, yeah, it's everywhere. I mean yes.

Courtney Andersen:

But now you saying that though now I see it of it's a generational of where you are at and how that was talked about.

Deb Podlagar:

Yeah, and I think the younger generation like these, you know the young adults. Now, to them it's like oh, I do yoga in the morning. You know, why would I want to show up here with a hangover? You know, they have a whole different perspective on alcohol and drinking. You know, it's not so much like I have a problem, it's just like I want to be healthy, I want to drink my green juice and, you know, go to spin class. Meanwhile I'm going to get shots and injections in my knees.

Courtney Andersen:

When did you end up telling your husband?

Deb Podlagar:

I told him towards the end of January, so it's probably about three weeks in, maybe three, three and a half weeks in. And you know I did. I should say I told him maybe a few, you know, maybe a week or so in, like, oh, you know, I'm trying to, I'm trying these non-alcoholic wines, but I didn't say like I was really taking a break. I didn't tell him, like I didn't make any declarations. We went out to dinner and Iic wines, but I didn't say like I was really taking a break, I didn't tell him, like I didn't make any declarations. We went out to dinner and I was so nervous because I again I felt like he's going to think I have a problem, but he didn't know really how much I was struggling with it. He didn't. I mean I, I hit it, I think like many people. It was like I didn't share that I was finishing a bottle. It was like I'd make sure there was another one. So it was sitting on the counter. Maybe that still had a little bit in it, or you know, figure out a way for the wine to look like. Figure out for it to look like there was still wine left when I really had finished the bottle that night.

Deb Podlagar:

So he didn't know quite how how much I had been struggling and he was so understanding and kind and has only been supportive, like literally, when my non-alcoholic section you know bottles started collecting, he brought home a little beverage refrigerator for me to put all my non-alcoholic stuff in so I could organize it all. And then when I filled that up literally the first night, filled it up with all my options. The next night he brought home another one. So I have two beverage refrigerators in my dining room little, I call them Jack and Diane, and they're filled with non-alcoholic options and it's been great to have one place I can go to to grab something that I always know is safe to drink. Yeah, does he drink? He does, but he doesn't. If that makes sense, he could care less. I mean he could literally take it or leave it. We go out, he'll order iced tea.

Deb Podlagar:

He wasn't even thinking about a gin and tonic on the drive over where you know, before we go out, if he was drinking a gin and tonic and I was drinking my wine, I'd be thinking if he has another one, then I'm going to have another one. Then we get home I have some more. You know where he had none of that head chatter. So for him he doesn't. He could care less.

Courtney Andersen:

It's crazy because a lot of women that I end up working with one-on-one, it's like they'll be like, oh yeah, my partner, husband, whatever it's like they, it's not a problem with them. And I was like again, is this some? That's where I just feel like sometimes with females and males, it's just very different. But going back to hormones too, like it's just, it's just different. It's a different situation for women.

Deb Podlagar:

Yeah, and I think it's marketed to us as this mommy wine culture and you go to Target and there's the end cap and it has the wine and you know we're going to go trick-or-treating, we bring our wine and you know it's a hard day with the kids. Have some wine, you know whatever. So I think it's marketed to us as well. I definitely felt that you have two kids. I do have two daughters. So one daughter just got married this last summer and then I have one going to college, thank you, one going to college in the fall.

Courtney Andersen:

Well, so how has that, though, been for you as a mom in these last four years of being a mom who doesn't drink, Like how has that mothering shifted for you?

Deb Podlagar:

It's been great. I mean, I forget things, but that's just because I'm getting older. But I am not forgetting conversations. We've had you know conversations or whatever. Or thinking like, what did I tell them last night? Or do we watch that movie? Did we finish that Netflix show? So that has changed. And just I feel like just the connection, especially with my younger daughter. She started making mocktails with me on Instagram. We did a lot of videos together, especially in the early days. Now she's driving her car and working and stuff, so we don't do as much, but she's really involved in that. She's actually coming with me to a mindful drinking fest in January. So I feel like it's been a little hobby that we've been able to do together. She'll taste it. She's got a great palate, she'll try things and she's like, oh, mom, it's hilarious. So she loves trying on drinks.

Courtney Andersen:

I like that. Have you then talked to them more about alcohol?

Deb Podlagar:

Yes, my older daughter. She's not a drinker. Even at her wedding nobody was drinking. There was no wine, no alcohol, and it was their own choice. My younger daughter I'm like, please, don't even try. I just feel like she's got that little like she never has. But I just feel like there's that little bit of her that's like very curious and a little addictive personality. So I'm really like, please, please, please, please, don't even start down that road, you know, or just be really careful, especially with drugs and all of it. So we've had all those conversations, yeah.

Courtney Andersen:

That's good. Yeah, that's a conversation. It was funny because when we were in Disney, for some reason, my son was like I don't know how he where. He just said let's get some wine. This is what came out of this three-year-old's mouth and I was like what did you just say? And then I was. I said well, buddy, mama and dada don't drink. And I said this is a conversation. I said we don't drink alcohol. I said this is a conversation that we'll have down the road. But yeah, I was just like where did he just pick this up? Where did that come from? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, yeah, so that is, that's something that, as a mom who has a younger kid of, just will be interesting to see how that conversation goes, because that is the thing it's like. You know, we know that they're going to try it, but I just hope that it's just later on down the road and not in so much where it forms in those high school years.

Deb Podlagar:

Yeah, yeah, it just becomes addictive. And yeah, especially for my younger daughter, she wants to go into the law force and enforcement and I'm like you don't want to get yourself in trouble, just stay away from it, right?

Courtney Andersen:

Well, so do you see, then, now not have had a drink in four years. Of how much, though, was that mommy wine culture for you really embedded in you and your group of the mom friends around you?

Deb Podlagar:

For sure. Oh, yeah, I feel like I mean even especially during COVID, right, so it was all 2020. I was like, okay, now we're drinking at three o'clock in the afternoon and the kids are home with their laptops, and I remember thinking like, when things got shut down, I remember just thinking like, as long as I can have wine in this house, like I don't care, I don't care. You know, if we have enough food, I need to make sure we have wine. So that was my first stop was getting wine. But yeah, like the neighbors, we'd bit easier to, not, I wasn't having to socialize maybe as much as we maybe would have in 2019 if I had stopped drinking then. So for me it was a little bit easier.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, well, that's good, that's good, all right. Well, where can people find you? Tell us about your community too, because you have a community as well. When is I don't?

Deb Podlagar:

know when this podcast is coming out, but January 14th, 15th and 16th, which is during National Mocktail Week, which Marnie Ray is the founder of, national Mocktail Week. She's wonderful, she introduced us?

Courtney Andersen:

Yes, she did. And then Marnie has been on the podcast actually twice. I had her come in the first year and then this past year she came and we did a follow-up. So she talked about what's yeah, she's great. I past year she came and we did a follow-up.

Deb Podlagar:

So she talked about what's yeah, she's great, I love her. I love her. So I host a Mocktail Summit and I plan it during National Mocktail Week in honor of Marnie. So the Mocktail Summit, it's all virtual, it's all online. It's a three-day event January 14th, 15th, 16th. So you can find me mocktailmomcom is my website and you can find the book there. The Happiest Hour, my membership. I have a mocktail club and we make mocktails once a week on a little Zoom and have a happy half hour just to connect and make drinks together.

Courtney Andersen:

Yeah, I will put all of your information in the show notes below, but tell us what is, just because you can also get her book. But I just want you to give us a little like one of your favorite mocktails that you love to make like an easy one that listeners could be like oh, like one of your favorite mocktails that you love to make like an easy one that listeners could be like oh, I could do that.

Deb Podlagar:

Okay, Well, I have a whole chapter called Mules for Days. I had so much fun writing the names of the chapters, like Buzzworthy Brunch and Hot Flash Mamas Need Frozen Drinks. That's all chapter. But one is called A Cranberry Dream and it's just a mule with cranberry juice. I can give you the exact recipe if you want it. It's two ounces of non-alcoholic whiskey and you just build it right in a copper cup like a mule cup, so you don't have to get out your shaker cup, you don't have to do anything fancy. An ounce of cranberry juice and about half an ounce of lime juice over ice. Give it a little stir, garnish it with lime, garnish with some cranberries on a little you, but with cranberry juice it's so good. So you could even do like a non-alcoholic rum if you want to buy a bottle of rum. But yeah, an easy, easy drink to make.

Courtney Andersen:

I love it. I love it. Well, thank you so much. And I have to say this about mocktails and I don't think we said it, but like the thing with mock can be used as a tool. Okay is that it is very easy when you quit drinking alcohol again to going back to the mindset of, like I'm going to be losing so much. Right, it almost feels like a deprivation. But when you have mocktails in there, it's almost you're not feeling like that if you use them, right Of replacing it during. You know, if you're making dinner and you're using a mocktail or an NA wine instead of wine, but it's replacing something and it doesn't feel like such a complete deprivation, because I think that the deprivation it's where that fucks a lot of people up.

Deb Podlagar:

Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yep, yep, no, yeah, it definitely is such a great replacement and, yeah, there's no. For me it was. I felt like I'm going to be what am I going to drink, you know? So, yeah, I've never once felt deprived and I haven't been thirsty for four years.

Courtney Andersen:

All right. Well, thank you so much for coming on and sharing all your wisdom of mocktails, and I just love what you're doing.

Deb Podlagar:

I wish, you nothing but the best. Thank you for having me. Thank you so much, you are welcome.

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