Studio Chat
This is where conversations about self care and life happens, to help you to become an expert in your own life when it comes to self love and self care. To trust your gut and have your own back and to strengthen your mind/body connection."To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness".
Studio Chat
Divorce, remarriage & blended families
Discover the secrets to successfully blending families with my guests, Seth and Stephanie Mulder. With ten children between them, Seth and Stephanie offer a wealth of experience and practical advice on navigating marriage, divorce, and remarriage. They share their personal stories, including how they met after their previous marriages, and discuss the complexities and joys of creating a cohesive, loving environment.
We also tackle the challenging topic of prioritizing the marital relationship, especially when children are involved. Contrary to popular belief, staying in an unhappy marriage for the sake of the kids isn't always the best option. Seth and Stephanie share heartfelt anecdotes about the importance of setting a positive example for children by demonstrating love and respect in their relationship.
Lastly, we delve into the significance of self discovery and personal growth in forming lasting relationships. Stephanie shares her experience of creating a "love list" to attract the right partner and stresses the importance of taking time to heal after significant life changes. This episode is a treasure trove of advice and inspiration for anyone looking to nurture love and build meaningful relationships.
theforeveryoungshow.com
Welcome to the Studio Chat podcast, the podcast designed to be your companion in the journey of self-discovery. I'm Barbara Thompson, your host and a dedicated therapist. I'm the founder and owner of Self Care Studio, a private counseling practice With my clients and courses that I create. On this podcast, I'm committed to ensuring that you have the support that you need. I created this podcast as a space for you to feel a sense of connection and a reminder that you're not alone in this thing that we call life, this adventure. This podcast is your weekly reminder to trust yourself, live life authentically and embrace the path that is uniquely yours. Together, we'll explore ways to break free from people pleasing, overthinking, allowing you to claim your time and energy to live life on your terms. You'll be joined by myself as I take you through some episodes or, during the year, I'll have some special self-care experts as guests on my podcast.
Speaker 2:So, if you're ready to step into a life that's truly for you, join me on this journey. Let's navigate the twists and turns of life together and, more importantly, live your life for you. So thank you so much for choosing to spend some time with me today. Let the studio chat begin. Hey, what a nice way to start a podcast. I'm just laughing. We haven't even really gotten to things, so I have just met. We haven't even really got into things, so I have just met the most extraordinary couple here, seth and stephanie molder, if I pronounced that correctly you congratulations.
Speaker 1:You're one of the few like. It shouldn't be hard.
Speaker 3:But yes, molder, we've been called murder mule deer I frequently get a lot of oh, you mean like fox molder from x files.
Speaker 2:I'm like yeah, yeah, do they have that show? Do they have that show in?
Speaker 1:australia yeah, yep, that was a really big. I frequently get a lot of oh, you mean like Fox Mulder from X-Files.
Speaker 2:I'm like, yes, do they have that show? Do they have that show in Australia? Yeah, yeah, that was really big yeah.
Speaker 1:I'll tell you what. So when that show came out I'm going to say roughly the mid-1990s, I was 19. I was in Japan, I was serving full-time ministry Christian ministry and I was not familiar with the show prior to coming out. Like I don't think it, I think it aired, I think it debuted when I, after I left the United States, I was in Japan right, I'm in Tokyo and surrounding areas, and the way you pronounce Mulder in Japanese is Morda, and the way you pronounce Mulder in Japanese is Molda. And so I would and that's exactly how my you know, that's, you know. So I'd say hello, I'm, I'm, you know, mulder Molder, I'm Molda Choro, and they were like, ah, molda X-Virus, and I had no idea what any of them were talking about because I'd never seen the show, but it was always a great way to, you know, break the ice, I guess.
Speaker 2:Yeah, for sure, but weird because you probably wouldn't have known what they were talking about. You probably thought it was like a Japanese custom, the way that they are, I had no idea Like have you seen the show?
Speaker 1:I'm like, no, I haven't actually.
Speaker 2:So this is the first time on my podcast, I think I'm up to about 127 episodes and I haven't had a double date, I haven't had two guests on at the same time. So this is like, really, this is going to test me this is fantastic.
Speaker 1:I love it let's put her to the test, stephanie, yeah, please do please do.
Speaker 2:Please do so today. I mean, the overarching thing we're going to talk about. Obviously they're all blended together. Do you like how I did that? All of these things that we're talking about are blended together, so it's blended families, marriage, divorce and remarriage, so all of those are huge things, but I'm going to make it like bite-sized. So I'm thinking of people that are listening to this, people that are in the grind now, actually in the blended family, people that have been divorced and might be looking for love and have children, or people that are in a relationship and would like to remarry with children. So I'm kind of thinking that. So we'll take the conversation there.
Speaker 3:How does that?
Speaker 2:sound.
Speaker 1:Fantastic. I say we do it Okay.
Speaker 2:So, before we really get into like the nitty gritty, I did ask you before and that's why we started to record, because I'm really famous for talking. I want to get to know you. And then I'm like, oh, we should start recording. I asked between the two of you how many children you have. And how many children do you have, stephanie? We have 10, yeah. So when you said 10, my eyes were like, oh, I didn't play it cool at all. I was like, well, that's a good number. I was expecting, like you know, five or six if we got really, really crazy well, well, you just signed up for crazy.
Speaker 2:I love that. I love that. So can the two of you share a little bit about how you met and how you made this beautiful? You know, this family together?
Speaker 1:It is beautiful. I'll start. I'll say it's beautiful. I'll let Stephanie finish the rest of the story. So we'd both been previously married. Uh, I was married for almost 16 years and had six children in that marriage.
Speaker 3:I'd been married six and a half years and I had two children.
Speaker 1:And when we uh and we we okay Sometime, like since, since we're, since this is a first Barbara, like first time you've had a couple on, I'm just going to say maybe we need to be the first people that you have come back because we have to tell you our meeting story. We don't have time for it today, but but suffice it to say, um, I I'd been, I'd been going through separation and then divorce, uh, and met Stephanie.
Speaker 3:She'd been single for A little over five years.
Speaker 1:A little over five years and I think you need to definitely pop onto the whole. You're going to get remarried, you're going to be snatched off the market soon story. So I'll truncate my comment here. But Stephanie had been, you know, single for a while and we actually have just the most amazing healing fun finding love story. Again. I, we, I say I. I saw her across the dance floor. We're both avid dancers. Country Western swing Okay, country Western swing. Do you have any? Do you have any country listeners among any country fans?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I do have a good following in the States so and around the world. So when you say this, I know people listening and going yeah, yeah, I'm into that stuff too. Okay.
Speaker 1:Country. And, by the way, hats, way hats, since, since you're in australia, hats out, our hats off are tipping our hat today to lee connigan. We love lee, we listen to lee connigan all the time by the way um and the wolf brothers. But uh, we met. Uh, we met on the country dance floor. I saw her across the floor and I was a regular there. She she had just come from Arizona, the state of Arizona, to the state of Utah. She hadn't been there. How long were you here?
Speaker 1:Uh, I think it was about three months, almost three months, yeah, so it wasn't long and uh, that's a that's another story, but uh, I saw her and she smiled at me. She doesn't remember smiling at me.
Speaker 3:I smiled at a lot of people. She wasn't smiling at you.
Speaker 2:She was just probably smiling. Yeah, because she was having a good time and you just happened to catch her eye.
Speaker 3:Exactly. Somebody looks at me and smiles. I'm going to smile back.
Speaker 1:It was enough for me. She smiled at me and I'm like, oh, mate, did she? She was smiling in my direction, all right, and I happened to be in that direction, so I received it, I took it, Right. Uh, she smiled at me, I, uh, I. I then uh, walked over to her and I said well, who's, who's that attractive woman? Uh, and that I don't know, because I was a regular at this, the particular place, and I'm like I knew just about everybody.
Speaker 1:You know who, for certain who is a regular, and we started to dance and I, you know, of course, I asked her name and introduced myself. She said Stephanie and I said great name, uh to myself. I, okay, I wasn't like great name, um to her. And we started dancing and no kidding, barbara, no kidding, seven seconds into this dance I am, I was about to say, swept off of my feet, which is odd for the dancing lead to say, but, but the point carries, I just couldn't help but blurting out Stephanie, you can dance because this, this woman, has rhythm, um and uh, a dating and a courtship that was eight months to the day, eight months to the day, and we got married.
Speaker 2:Wow, and how long ago was that.
Speaker 3:This December will be our 10-year anniversary.
Speaker 2:What people cannot see is how you both look at each other.
Speaker 1:Hubba, hubba.
Speaker 2:Yeah, very much, very much. Both of you have that whole like if I was to describe it in a word you know, when you see someone and that, just that look in their eyes of it's a really perfect mix of mix of respect but also god, I'm in love with you. That's what I see, that's what I see from both of you. When you're talking, he's looking at you with lovey eyes. And then when she's talking, you're looking at, you're both doing it to each other yeah, I feel very seen.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, very much. One thing that I feel like we committed to at the beginning of our marriage, when we got engaged, was we will always be newlyweds, we will always put our marriage to the forefront and continue to work on that and, um, you know, when people make comments like you just did, it's very validating that we are working on that and we're still hanging in there.
Speaker 2:I can see that. I can see that, oh, wow, so eight months. I love how there's no rules, because you know how so many people get hooked up on rules oh, it's too soon. I've got children. I've got this. So I've been married and divorced, but I don't have children. Children, I've got this. So I've been married and divorced but I don't have children. But, um, I can relate to some parts, but some of the parts I see from afar.
Speaker 2:So it's as a therapist, so it's so interesting to have these chats. Where do we go from here? I think can we start with. I think let's go kind of chronological order in a way. So let's go. You've both been married and then divorced with children. How tough is that to break away? Because again, when we're talking about rules, there's so many rules of people going oh, you've got to stay together for the kids. The kids are better off. But as a therapist, I see children too that come out the other end of people that stay together, married for 20, 30 years, and it's for the kids, and the kids know they can almost put a finger on when the love that mom and dad don't have anymore and they get affected. So it's. I don't know where that story came from of people like I want you to stay together, for the kids are smart, kids know.
Speaker 3:Kids know probably more before the parents know that maybe there's no love there anymore one thing that I remember going through before, so I was the one that I don't even know.
Speaker 1:Initiated.
Speaker 3:Initiated Thank you, initiated divorce in my first marriage and I had heard that a lot from people saying you know, oh, I'll leave when the kids are out of high school, yeah, and that always rubbed me the wrong way. And I wasn't quite sure until a little bit later down the road when I realized that what are we teaching our children when we stay just for them? For me, I think I had somebody say something, or God enlightened me in this way of I'm teaching my child what to put up with, I'm teaching my child that they're not worth it to leave so that they can have peace and happiness, but my child is, which I think is really dangerous and not healthy. And I think that was one of the breaking points for me was realizing, when somebody asked me if your daughter were in a relationship that you're in right now, what would, what advice would you give her? And I'm like, holy crap, yeah, girl, leave but it's hard either way, isn't it?
Speaker 2:it's hard leaving and it's hard staying. So none of this is something that no one ever takes lightly. No one ever gets married. I'm speaking from my own personal point too. I never got married to thinking, yeah cool, mine was. I was with him for eight years, married for one, and then I left after one, going, oh my gosh. But the writing was on the wall from day one and I just kept ignoring it, thinking, thinking it'll get better, it'll get better. And then what a lot of people think and I think I can say this out loud as a lot of us just think oh, when we get married, things will get better. Like a lot of people think, when we have a child together, our bond will grow together, which is completely the opposite.
Speaker 3:It's true. It's something that I heard a therapist say when I was in my first marriage was, if you're, if you have a beautiful relationship with respect and love and all of that, if you have a baby, it will grow. If you have a marriage that is not full of respect and love and joy, well, that's going to grow, you know. So whatever you have is gonna grow from having a baby.
Speaker 2:a baby's not a cure-all yeah, my baby, I've got a puppy. She's pretty good on the podcast. She just started to bark, so that's why I was just like I think she was.
Speaker 1:She was just saying I agree yeah, but yeah, that's.
Speaker 2:That's beautifully said that.
Speaker 1:To that point about staying for the kids. Uh, because, on my side, like I fought tooth and nail to save our marriage Right Cause I was on the receiving end. Now, of course, different spouses, different reasons, um, but I, I I remember thinking like how can we do this to our kids? But then again, keep in mind, I'm the one who wants to keep our family intact for various reasons. Where I am today, of course I want the best outcomes for my, for our children, my children, our children. But staying for the kids, I think, is the wrong, it's a red herring.
Speaker 1:It's the wrong argument, right? Or it's the wrong question. Why don't we just stay for the kids? Why don't we stay for us?
Speaker 1:And one thing that Stephanie and I, I think and I don't remember who initiated this maybe we did it together. If we didn't do it together, it was you, I'm certain, because it's a great idea, but it was. The best thing that we can do for our children as single parents is to be happy and healthy as we are right now. Wherever we are as a married couple now remarried, blending families, the number one thing that we can do for our children, the number one gift that we can give them in this life, is to show them what a healthy, vibrant, respectful I was about to say steamy relationship looks like and to come full circle. That's why we should stay together. If we're going to stay together, it takes two committed people to make this train run smoothly. It takes one to jettison, it takes one to jump the tracks right. But if we're going to do this, let's do it for us, and even I'm going to do this for me, meaning that before we can be in us and happy in a relationship, I got to want to be that person right. So there are a lot of parts that have it's kind of like that combination lock. They all of those things have to come together, and the children are one of the last numbers, as important as the children are. Again, it's like the story I heard the story I heard that breaks my heart, that really impacted me, I think. Coming out of marriage and then getting back into marriage and it was. I think it was.
Speaker 1:I want to say this was a friend. If not, this was some article I wrote. So I don't want, I don't want that, I don't want that. I wrote that. I read, um, but basically, your children want to know that your spouse, in this case my our children want to know that Stephanie, to me, is the number one, most important person in the world, above the children in the world, above the children, right. And I remember, I remember this. This individual telling me the worst day of their life was when their parent I think it was their dad said you're the most.
Speaker 1:You know the dad speaking to the child after the divorce, right, or going through the divorce or pre-divorce. You know who's the number one person in your life, dad? Well, it's you, and our kids know they're not number one, stephanie's number one. You know in my heart and our kids glory in that they're like and mom's number one. Actually, they're always like God's number one, right, and then mom's number two, and then I'm number three, right, but I think kids need that and that's why you don't stay for the kids. Should you think about the ramifications? Should that be something that pauses you to say are we heading in the right direction? Absolutely, it's your responsibility as a parent, but first and foremost, you need to be doing this for you, because otherwise it's all junked up.
Speaker 2:Exactly what Stephanie said is those little kids, all kids of any age, are watching their parents as role models and whatever the family household looks like, that's what they know about love, that's what they know about communication, that's what they know is okay and that's a perfect example. Um, I know my parents stayed together. It's interesting because then I can come from a different perspective. When I was a child, my parents were married for 21 years and, um, my dad would have. It was in the 80s that my parents oh no, sorry, so I was a 1980 baby, so my parents married maybe a year before that. So around that time my dad was very successful in business. If you had a wife and kids, I actually think you got a bit of a pay rise because of it. Like you actually got bumped in the corporate world because you were married and you had a child.
Speaker 2:So I know, looking back and know what my dad's like, I'm pretty sure that's why he married my mom, and so my mom was head over heels for my dad. My dad, not so much, wasn't faithful at the end and in the middle, so I'm pretty sure that behavior would have started in the beginning. And so my parents are married for 21 years and I and then my dad obviously left mum for another woman and I just remember and I was 20 when my parents divorced still hard, still affects you, um, but at the same time, my parents are were uh, I'm a byproduct of my parents being together for the kids when my mum was like the time that they really needed to break up was the time I had my biggest exams and mum was like no, barbara's doing good at school, I don't want her to whatever. Um. So yeah, it's, it's interesting um that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, looking back, I was a product of that of my parents staying together and and because of that, the last few years or of my dating life, I was dating, obviously, guys like my dad. So, kind of think, if my mum did separate, I wonder what my dating and marriage relationship would have been like. Would I have still gone towards guys like my dad?
Speaker 1:Interesting.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Definitely I'm along the same train of thought as you are of it's really easy for a young girl to marry her father per se when they're in an intact family like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, for sure, because it was my normal, and now I know that's not normal, but I had to learn that lesson.
Speaker 3:Definitely that's where the bar is set and that's what creates the normal Instead of, like. You know, when I left my husband my first husband, you know I was happy to realize and recognize when Seth and I got married and how it changed me and my two biological children, how we set that bar so much higher and my two biological children and myself have risen to that bar. And if I had not left, then that bar would have stayed low and that's where we would have had, like you said, our normal.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, wow, okay. So you're on the dance floor, you guys meet.
Speaker 1:Stephanie, you can dance.
Speaker 2:You guys meet and you and you date. You know how do you juggle. It's something I a lot from our single parents with children. Doesn't matter if it's one or two or five, whatever. I don't have time. I don't. My time is really limited because it's all taken up with the child and the routine and everything. What's something that the two of you could give us a bit of advice to people that are listening, that are single, that have got children, that are dating or would like to date, but trying to manage their time a bit better, because I just hear that all the time people go oh where am I going to have the time, barbara, or I would like to, or what kind of what are some tips that we could give some people today?
Speaker 3:For me. One rule that I had for myself was that I would not introduce my children to the man I was dating unless I knew it was really serious and we're heading towards marriage. It was really important for me to not drag my kids' hearts through it, because I knew what that felt like and it's painful, so why put a child through it? So that was one thing or something else that I was going gonna say shoot, I don't remember, you, wait for it, wait for it oh, now I'm really what's it to do with the time?
Speaker 2:because I'm just curious to know that when you're a single parent, and obviously sometimes when the child's at the other parent's house, that could be a time that you could date. But sometimes some of the people that I see in my clinic are full-time parents that don't have the option of when they go to mom and dad's. They've got the child 24, seven. How can they.
Speaker 3:That's actually how I was for most of the eight months I had my two children, except for, I think what four or five weeks in the summer. Other than that, they were with me full time. So one thing that we did was we spent a lot of family time together, which I thought was really great being able to After we were serious.
Speaker 3:Yes, after we were serious, which was only a few months, so we spent a lot of time as as quote unquote a family, you know, trying to get to know one another, because you do marry the family, and I think that's really so true when you're, when you're dating somebody and you both have kids, or even just one of you has kids, you're not just marrying the other, the spouse or the oh my goodness the partner, you're also marrying into the children, and so that was one dynamic that I think really worked for us. Another thing that I will say is it's really important for, I believe, for the children to see you date. Like we've talked about already, you are the role model of what a healthy relationship looks like. So if you want your children to have those healthy relationships when they get older, then you need to show them what that looks like, and for me it was going out on a date once a week without children.
Speaker 1:With your partner. Yes, yeah, we still. We do that today. Yep, the kids know, hey, listen, once a week mom and dad are going out on a date, and that's just the way it is, you know.
Speaker 2:So 10 years in, you still do that. Yes.
Speaker 1:Yep, yep.
Speaker 2:Every week.
Speaker 1:Yes, we have an executive council every Sunday, typically when we do it, and we'll schedule out when we're doing it Now. Have we missed weeks? Absolutely, we've missed weeks, yeah.
Speaker 3:When we do miss weeks, we do try to make it up, though, Even if it is just. Hey, let's put the kids to bed and tell them that this is mom and dad time and we're going to go watch a show together or do something together.
Speaker 1:Which is what we typically do put them together and it's mom and dad time. But sometimes it's like the do not come out of that room or else corporal punishment will be reenacted. Right, Because this is date time, Like. Like, there's there's mom and dad time, our private time, and our prep time to get you know as a couple, to get ready for the next day and veg, or you know whatever we're going to do, relax, go sit around a campfire or watch a show, or you know, or do some reading or cooking, but there's also there's date time and they know that, like, date time is sacred.
Speaker 2:Um.
Speaker 1:I would say I would say um kind of negotiating that like pre. Like, even before Steph and I got serious and even before we met, I I was prioritizing me and my self care. So we are social creatures, um so being, and we all have various you know, we're at various levels on the spectrum right Of how social we want to be and what we like. But I will tell you this One of the reasons that I was in the quote unquote dating scene is because I was in the social scene. Like sociality comes before dating like getting out and meeting people.
Speaker 1:When I was going through my divorce, through the early separation and divorce, I had a spiritual counselor who looked at me because he could see that I was just devastated, um, and he was counseling both of us, uh, or or giving us both both some counsel. And and he just said, seth, I appreciate how much you love your wife and the passion that you have. Uh, she's not ready to receive you, so you're ready to give yourself. She's not ready to receive you. And if it's ever fixed, there's going to be a long, long time in the making. So that kind of set some expectations for me. But then this is what rocked my world and what led me, honestly, to be on that dance floor. He said, seth, god wants Seth Mulder to be Seth Mulder and nobody else. And when you're not you, when you give up you right and so many people in relationships can understand when you give up you and you give up those boundaries and you surrender, thinking that you're doing it for the relationship and for the good of the relationship. And I'm not talking about healthy negotiation here, you know, I'm talking about losing yourself, right, um, in, in losing your individuality and almost your willingly. What, what did? What did my therapist call it once? Uh, learned helplessness, okay, yeah, yeah, you're shaking your head, right, I love it, or you're nodding your head, so, and when you're not, you he's not pleased. Like, go be you. And that was for me, where I was and where my marriage was. You know, I was not feeling free to live and to do the things, to dress the way I normally dress, to speak the way I speak, to smile right, to work out, socialize, play basketball, like all of those things recreation. There were a lot of hampers that were put on that and so I gave them up to save the relationship, even my career, to save the relationship, even my career. So that was just a message to me, like a message from God, like a finger on the wall saying, hey, go be you Again. First, before there's ever a healthy relationship with somebody else, you got to be healthy you, and so that led me to dancing again.
Speaker 1:I took up dancing again and I hadn't really danced for 15, 16 years, right, and so I got serious about it. Like I do pretty much anything I decide to do, I hyper-focused on it and it was a huge, huge boon to my relationship with my daughter. At the time I had five boys and one girl. Uh, these kids were between the age when we got divorced roughly 23 to six or seven, seven to 23, roughly Right. And so my daughter, who was 11, 12 at the time, loved to dance. I did get to dance a little with her cause. She loved to dance, but we started partner dancing at home and relearning Like I was relearning all of the country Western moves and steps, and we just had the time of our lives and then I'd put the kids in bed and I'd go to the dance club.
Speaker 1:Right, they were old. You know, I had older kids, they were, they were fine alone, and that's, I guess for me it's making time to date, yes, and that's, I guess for me it's making time to date, yes, but I was making time for me and investing in my health, which happened to be in a social situation. So to date was just the next natural. It was like one step further, like, if you're going from being holed up and crushed from this relationship you were betrayed or you were the betrayer, whatever right then going like making all the time and all the sacrifice to take two or three steps down the road, that's hard, but when I was just investing in me, one important step.
Speaker 1:That was easy, and then I was having so much fun then I, okay, well, now we met on the dance floor and many of the all of those relationships, by the way, except for the one with Stephanie terminated right and so we just, I just think it was important to be willing to invest in me and my health, you know, my physical well-being. Dancing is exercise, it's emotional, right, intellectual, is relearning a skill, and then yeah, anyway, Thank you.
Speaker 2:A lot of people need to hear that, because myself through my healing journey, and why a lot of people come and see me too, is because we lose ourselves. We're so busy pleasing everyone around us and doing the thing that society thinks we should be doing. Remember how we talked about following all the rules, and I truly believe that that's how we lose ourselves. But when, once we find ourselves and know it can be who we are and improve ourselves and be the best that we can be, we're going to mirror that and you're going to find someone, and I think that's why you met Stephanie is because you were at that higher level of self. You were like I'm going to put myself first and then I'm going to attract someone that does the same.
Speaker 1:Definitely so many women. We serve women. That's what we do professionally, that's what we do in the content space and in the media space and our podcast. And I said this recently to a good friend of ours who's actually a content and branding coach in Las Vegas, Nevada, here in the US. Divorced mother of two, Twice divorced mother of two. I think we'll put that in and I sent this little video that we were just working on, a piece of content and it basically said here's my advice what every woman needs to know about self-care from the perspective of a man. And I said it's not selfish.
Speaker 2:Thank you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, content, like she's been on the show. We've been on her show, right, we've. She's seen a lot of our content, a lot of our branding seth.
Speaker 2:I think that's my favorite video that you guys have published that I've ever seen, right, because it ran it, because it rings true and especially for women it's coming from a man, yeah yeah I was actually a guest on a podcast it's actually coming out next month of a guy in the States Can't remember what state he's from actually, but anyway, he was interviewing me about my business and about my healing journey and stuff. And I said that I've been single for about seven years because I really needed this time to heal and work on myself and do all this stuff. And one of his questions was don't you think that's really selfish, aren't you? You know, like um, do you think you're a really selfish person and do you think the business and how you help other people it's coming from really selfish point of view, because it's all about you? And so I just trumped it. I just went up and I said, well, this is what I think. And he was kind of like oh, oh, um, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah. Well, I probably don't look after myself, so I can't remember how I actually answered it, but the fact that he came at me my business is called Self Care Studio I've, you know, rewired my brain.
Speaker 2:I've had to like rewire every. That's why, you know, I moved. I moved to Australia for a guy that didn't work out and I stayed here. And I purposely stayed here because I knew nobody. So I had to relearn everything. I had to relearn my networks. I had to. I had no one to lean on on the hard times. I had to lean on myself and that was the best thing is, once you've got yourself and you can connect with yourself, nothing can. You can't feel abandoned anymore because you know that you've got yourself.
Speaker 2:And it was just interesting from a male perspective. He said to me oh, isn't that quite selfish? And I was like, wow, somebody, yeah, and it was just interesting. It's interesting to hear a male say that, which is so healthy, that for all of us listening, we live our lives for ourselves and everything else is a byproduct of that. And everything is kind of the cherry on the top. And, like you said, stephanie, when you met Seth, that kind of the cherry on the top and you know, and that, like you said, stephanie, when you met Seth, that kind of in your marriage, has up, leveled you to that next level. So that's what we do is we, we work to a level and the people that we meet kind of the cherries on the top that make us better and make us grow to that next level. They don't fulfill us. We're, we're full, we're whole. It's kind of just the extra yummy toppings on the top, if that makes sense. Weird that I'm talking about Sunday toppings, but anyway.
Speaker 1:Why not? Why not? Like, whenever I'm on a flight, we do a lot of business in Asia, and whenever we take that business class upgrade and after you have your stake, you get us. We fly United just because I've been flying them, for you know, you fly somebody forever and then, and you have status, so you don't wanna give it up. So we're always on United and on business class. They always give you a sundae, an ice cream sundae afterward, right? So you're talking about all these toppings and they're always asking what you want. I'm always like give me the, give me the almonds, the nuts, give me the caramel and double the chocolate, right, so I'm, I'm right with you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all the toppings for sure, yeah, so it's. Yeah. That's interesting that you just said that, cause I've literally just been interviewed by a man that said oh, I find that very selfish what you're doing in your business and everything. And it really caught me off guard because it's not true. But just hearing it from someone, I was like I know the younger version of myself would have been really hurt by that and really probably listened to him as well. That's how much growth you can do.
Speaker 1:That's how much you've grown?
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, for sure, for sure.
Speaker 3:I will say that that reminds me of when I was. You know that five years before I met Seth and I was a single mom and I had at least three people, maybe more. That said, you know, I would talk to them about my list that I had made for what I'm looking for in a spouse.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And at least three of them were like why don't you just settle? You know you're not going to get all of those things on your list. And I'm just like did you just tell me to settle? Why would I settle what Like? Like are you kidding me? And I know I remember at least two of them were men. Like are you kidding me? And I know I remember at least two of them were men. And just looking back, I'm like man. They just wanted me to lower the bar so that they could probably get, you know, in that playing field. They know my bar was too high.
Speaker 2:Well, they're not friends, are they? Yeah, I got excited when you said the list and Seth saw my body language when you said the list. It's because I was like this is the best, because this is actually this whole week. Normally, like as a therapist, I have themes that come through my clinic and one of the themes this week is a lot of people looking for love and a lot of people I say to them do you know what you want? Be very clear, what's your list? It's not about ticking boxes, it's about kind of portraying and putting it out there. If you, if you say I'm gonna be a single forever, I'm not gonna meet anyone, we that's exactly what's gonna happen. But if you are very clear, that person's gonna be attracted to you. And it makes it so much easier when you know, because most people will say, oh, do you know what you're looking for? Oh, no, oh, when you actually ask someone, they go, oh yeah, oh no, I don't really know, I'll just, I'm happy to have somebody, which is that settle part.
Speaker 3:Or or they're like oh, I just want a good man. Okay, but you got to be more specific than I just want a good man, cause there there are a lot of good men out there. I want a great man.
Speaker 2:So I'm going to be more specific in what that looks like. How about the best man? It's like the creme de la creme and a lot of people. So now I have a lot of my clients, and any of you that are listening to this they'll be laughing going. Oh my God. It's good that someone else has said that, because I get them to go away and some some people are so blocked that I spend a session sitting there with them and I make the list. I have my pen and paper. I'm like go everything, just go. And I go, go deeper, go deeper, and I literally help them create a list of what they're looking for. I'm like what does he look like? What does he do? I don't know, what music does he like? Where does he hang out? Um, everything. Like we go into the depths of everything and they go oh wow, he's really cool and I've that myself. So it's really cool that someone else has said that, because it's so important to have that list.
Speaker 3:Yes, so I'm going to. I'm going to go back just a little bit. Something that I think it probably stemmed from for me is when I went through my divorce. I was only the second person in my extended family who had ever been through a divorce at the time, and my uncle had. He's the one that had been divorced like seven years before I was, and he had said Stephanie, I want you to sit down and I want you to make a list of all the things that you love and that you love about yourself, and then go through that list and see which ones you are acting on.
Speaker 3:And then become that list and I realized, you know, I, I haven't been doing all these things that I love or that you know bring me joy. And then fast forward later. I realized you know what I? I want to make a list, because I had always been like, oh, I'm not sure how I feel about lists. You know a list of somebody.
Speaker 3:But then I realized, um, I might've even been to like a church seminar or something that talks a little bit about this, but, um, I realized that I need to have a list so that I can see what I need to work on, because if I want to attract um a partner who is doing these things or you know as healthy, or you know anyways doing these things, then I need to become those things too. I can't just expect it from the person I want to marry. I need to become those things. And if I focus on me becoming those things then, like you said, I'm going to attract that person. And it became a lot easier for me after that. Stop focusing on the other men that are out there and focusing more on me becoming that list.
Speaker 2:One thing I want to debunk. It's interesting when you guys first met. You know how it's something I learned really late on in life that when you get butterflies, normally that's a nervous system response that someone's not good for you. You know how in the movies they say when you get butterflies, it's so interesting. Did you guys get butterflies when you met?
Speaker 1:Well, number one, I had butterflies when I was dancing with her, because she's a woman, could dance, and I could appreciate that, like, I could really appreciate that and like that for me. For me, stephanie had a light about her, like there there's a beauty, uh. Uh. She had a halo right, like if, if, if she was an old Christian, an old Christian art, she'd have, you know, she'd have that little glow. It was the smile that wasn't apparently at me, it was just to everybody.
Speaker 2:But, um, I love that.
Speaker 1:But there again, again, talk about you. Talk about like attracts, like, right, frequency attracts frequency. So you might not necessarily be thinking, oh, this, this, this, this, I love that. But yeah, she was all of those things you know from from day one that just matched it felt, it felt good, right At the same, and I was. You know, we talked about rules at the beginning, like no rules.
Speaker 1:I'll tell you, there was a guideline that a good friend gave me and he said after my divorce, and he said one year, seth, do not make any major relationship decision lasting major decision within the first year. Why it's more important than because I've shared that with a lot of people. You can take it or leave it. For me that was a great guideline because of what I was going to experience the next year, right, um, so Stephanie was after that year, uh had happened, uh, but I but I was still, I was just, I'd been in several relationships willing to let them kind of flow, not force things, not be so excited that there was somebody who thought I was actually nice guy, you know, it didn't think I was the world's worst person, you know, and sometimes you can be on the rebound and kind of take that.
Speaker 1:So I was just willing to let things flow. That for me, let things flow. Where do they connect? But I'll tell you. I mean, as Stephanie will say, she's going to use this word, so I'm going to take it before she can use it. Like I was in pursuit. She's always like you were pursuing me. Yeah, I was, was in pursuit. She's always like you were pursuing me. Well, yeah, I was.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's that's yeah, yeah, yeah, for god, greek gods, yeah, you know that's 100 what it should be and it should be easy that whole courtship should be. Really, you never quit. I'm sure you never questioned him, stephanie, I never. I'm sure you never like does he me, or when are we seeing each other? I reckon Seth would have been like yep, I like you. Here's what we're doing.
Speaker 3:Actually, actually, I think, because I mean he'd been married for 16 years plus, you know, after that, and and I felt like I had been on my healing journey before he was, and so I had to give him a little bit of space and leeway in that way to realize that, you know, he might need a little bit of space here and there just to kind of figure out, because it was a very powerful relationship, I think from nearly the beginning, and so it would be easy to just run away with our feelings if that's what we let ourselves do.
Speaker 3:And so there were several times, especially when my children were at their fathers in a different state for those four or five weeks, that Seth would be like you know what, I just need a couple of days by myself, or I need a couple of days just with my children to think things through and, just, you know, get through it.
Speaker 3:And so I was like all right, gave him a little bit of time. And then there were several times that I just had to say God, he either needs to call me or reach out in some way in the next 24 hours, or I can't do this, because it is really hard being committed in this relationship and then also not knowing where he's at at the same time. Right, and thankfully, god answered my prayer. Every time, within 24 hours, I did have him reach out and frequently it was, hey, what are you doing tonight or what are you doing tomorrow? And I'm like, okay, thank you, because it's hard to hang on, you know, to that love, but also feel like, well, I'm not going to go, you know, hang out with a bunch of singles when I'm committed to this relationship and we're talking marriage.
Speaker 2:That's the way it's. The what you're, what you're sharing with me, is so beautiful because it's the slow, healthy way. He's having time to just think things through, and actually you're doing the same, believe it or not, and that time thing when you're both so hot and heavy and wanna, it's that whole. I think for you guys there's a lot of energetic energy, like you're meant to meet. This is really big, so really big powerful relationships and couples. There's big energy, of course. That's what's yeah, you know, I can see it on you guys now and that's 10 years in the brewing, it's 10 years in the making and that oh, it's brewing, baby.
Speaker 2:I'll tell you that and that big energy is still there, which is you're such great role models for people in this blended family area and in second marriage and getting remarried and divorced, and you guys are so great role models to show what life is and what life is all about and what life should be like.
Speaker 1:Thank you, yeah, it's. I'm grateful. I'm grateful God's been really good to us. We've also been good to us. We've also made mistakes and tripped and you know, I mean like like literally, I knew Stephanie, you know again, for me, I'm trying to reestablish my boundaries, if you will.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to reestablish who I am in a relationship, right as I'm in a healthy in a healthy, in a healthy relationship and and being able to say that, yeah, I know you want to meet, but but right now, this weekend, I, I, I just need me time. You know I need, I need to, I need to get myself grounded. You know, in yoga we call it centered. Right, you know I need. I need to come back to that. At the same time, like I, I pretty much told my mother I wasn't living at home, right, I was an independent man, but I'm super close to my parents and they live, you know, in the Valley, and I think I told my mom early on, within like the first two weeks.
Speaker 3:I think it was after the first time we met, but that's what I remember.
Speaker 1:Did I go home, did I go to my parents' house that night or something, and say something like I think I just met the lady, the woman I'm going to marry. So, like you're talking about that energy, we kind of like had those omens right, like you know, in a good way. You know kind of had the Oracle at delphi yes, there's, we're gonna do this, you know or the revelation in the sky, kind of a thing. At the same time, we still had to kind of work through the steps and and grow into it and grow and and. As amazing as it has been, goodness, we've had some struggles too. Oh my goodness, sometimes I forget about yeah like.
Speaker 2:We had a most amazing first year and the most difficult first year 100, you know was it with blending all the kids together, I think that was a huge part of it, a big part of it I think yeah
Speaker 2:yeah, and then also having your wife, your ex-wife and your ex-husband. So that's what you know I. I'm so curious to know and I'm gonna have to have you guys back there's. I think we're gonna have your story, because everyone's gonna be wanting to listen to that. And then, obviously, a re, I think an episode on blended families. But what?
Speaker 2:Um, like I, it's interesting me sitting here right now because, if I'm going to be really honest with you both, um, I've just turned 44 and I don't have children and I was always like I was such a black and white thinker, like I was the girl, that when I got married actually I was a bridesmaid for one of my best friends before I got engaged, before I got married, and she actually was unfaithful to her husband before she got married and I saw it happening and I had to stand next to her while she was getting married and I was so black and white that I was like that's so wrong and you don't do that, and I was standing there and I had so much judgment for her. And then she went on her honeymoon and came back and was a different person and then and then showed me all the photos of her honeymoon and then said, oh, I've left him and I'm going off with blah blah and I was and she walked and we just I wasn't friends with her anymore because I was like I don't want to be around someone like that. And then I fast forward to me getting engaged and being married and then me leaving my husband. I did reflect back on that and think, oh, I have grown and changed because I had to leave that relationship because it was so toxic. But at that time Barbara was like I don't want to meet someone with children. Before I was a therapist, before anything, I was just like, oh, no, no, no. And now I've had time to grow and heal, I'm like I'd actually love that.
Speaker 2:But what the biggest decision for me is is, when I meet someone and I'm sure that they may have children what my biggest concern is what their mother is like, because that's going to be a big determining factor of am I going to get involved in this family or not, especially with my job as a therapist. I know, I know, and that's what I'm concerned about I'm thinking, god, I meet someone with kids. I've actually, I'm okay with that. I'm actually I'll love that. I'd love to be a stepmom, I'd love that. I love children, but then I think, oh, there's not many family units that when it's separate, that ones that they're both okay, it's very rare. There's always one that has a chip on their shoulder or is very angry and doesn't want. They actually quietly still love you, but that's their way, that's anyway. We won't get into that. But that's what I'm concerned about is meeting someone with kids and then dealing with the other party. Um, is she a nice person? Is she not Like you guys? Got any tips for me before we wrap up?
Speaker 3:For me, the first thing that I thought of was make sure that the relationship is worth it, cause there were a lot of times that I'm like man this is so, so hard, one of the hardest things I've ever been through, besides leaving the first marriage, but I can tell you that I never doubted marrying Seth. That always made it worth it. The relationship was so beautiful and like. We've talked about hard at times, but we've we've committed to each other to grow through those hard times instead of letting it become a wedge through those hard times. And when you can find somebody like that, it doesn't matter what the outside forces are.
Speaker 3:Oh, really, Because the two of you the two of you are going to be okay, like if you're both committed to that, like remembering that you know we're on the same team. We're not on different teams. We may have different ideas or different passions surrounding a certain topic, but we're both on the same team. I think that's helped me a lot.
Speaker 1:I think that's helped me a lot, loving, like, again, that relationship. How much do you love that relationship? How much do you love this individual? Like Stephanie's? 100% correct. You're marrying into the family those children, potential children. But you are marrying this person and again there's a hierarchy there. You're always going to be with this person. That's the idea, right? Those children may come and go. Some of them may love you, think you're the best bonus mom in the world. Others may hate you, thinking you're the wicked witch of the West right or the East or whatever.
Speaker 3:Some of them. You may start out as the best and then become the wicked yeah.
Speaker 1:That the other ex spouse may think you know, may you know, but we, that's a whole like the whole segment man, we, we, we've been there. You know we've been there because, you know, on on my side of things, uh with with my former spouse, uh with with my former spouse, it's a very unhealthy, you know, our I say my children, our children, my children, uh, live in a, you know, and they're all adults now.
Speaker 1:By the way, those six kids range from 35 to 19 now, today, as of as of in 2024. So it's been really interesting. You could call our divorce high conflict with attorneys and what they call a special master, which is an attorney that has quasi-judicial authority in your family when parents can't get along and so they get to make judge-like decisions. So Stephanie's been the spouse that married into that right, god bless her. He did, he did. She's been amazing, she's been amazing. But what I was going to say is is that relationship, like, like the kids aren't number one, meaning that they're not the right. If you have that love for that person, then you have to say, is that the most important thing here? And for me it was right, whether Steph had kids or not.
Speaker 1:Kids Steph, the two children that Steph had, um, one who just barely moved out at 20, right, uh, she's, uh, you know, working and whatnot. And another who's about to leave on full-time ministry, who just turned 18. You know, we have a great relationship. I adopted one of them. One of them wanted to be adopted, you know, by me. The other, male, carrying his father's name, you know, wants to, wants to continue that and like, I get that and respect that, you know. And again, we, we, we could, we should absolutely have some other conversations about this, um, but, but you said you know what's. What's our advice to Barbara, like as as a friend, right and personal, like, listen, there are amazing people out there and that person is in the mirror and if you want to have a relationship, you know, I just believe that there's another person out there or I don't know 10,000, that could be a great match, right, right, and I and I say this my perspective my first marriage, I married into two kids when I was 22 and got married the first time and I met.
Speaker 1:I met those two boys who are seven and four. At the time their father had passed away. A year prior, they were six and three. And uh, and when I knocked on the door and met those boys for the first time, actually I met them on the first date that I had with their mother and we jumped on the floor and started wrestling and arm wrestling and they became my best buds, my best mates, and I adopted them a year later and, uh, they took my name or they added my name. We didn't change their father's last name, they. They retained that as a middle name, um, you know, in respect and honor to him, and uh, and we have six grandchildren through those two boys you guys are so young I don't even understand how you've cooked.
Speaker 1:Tell us about it. Tell us about it we are. It's amazing.
Speaker 3:Love it.
Speaker 1:And then I married Steph and we married in. You know, I married and to two other children as well, and I love all of those children. I absolutely love all those children. But my number one priority in this family is our relationship Right, and that sets the tone. And while I say that with strength and authority right now, wow have I learned that Like I could, I even, we even said it at the beginning, but implementing that sometimes I haven't. You know, we, we haven't been perfect. It's been hard, with so many emotions and and other, you know, former spouses involved in the like it's. It's been a, it's been a feature length film, it's been a soap opera, it's been a board game, right, and we don't always win, but but I know at the end of the day, we got this relationship that we're absolutely committed to. You know. I know at the end of the day, we got this relationship that we're absolutely committed to.
Speaker 3:you know, I think one of the best things that we could have done was I think it was about a year after we got married we saw a therapist for our marriage, and that wasn't necessarily because we had all these issues, but it's because we wanted to prevent any issues that might arise if we didn't already establish those boundaries and where we're at in our marriage.
Speaker 2:And we had issues.
Speaker 1:I had issues, you had issues too.
Speaker 2:I reword that to stuff. I say a lot. We just all have stuff. None of us are broken. We don't need to be fixed. We just experience this life. We meet different people. We have stuff that we. I always say that, like, when you guys meet, you'll have a suitcase. You travel a lot. So Seth has a suitcase and then Stephanie has a suitcase. You meet.
Speaker 1:She actually has several suitcases. I'm not saying emotionally, I'm just saying when she travels she has. If I have one, she's got like three, just so you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I get that. And then you'd open yours up Seth, and then you'd open yours up seth, and then stephanie would open yours up, and we always have our stuff, we always have our suitcases. And a lot of couples think that you need to be as one. You, we're two. We're always going to be two different people, but we can blend together on something, but we are always two different. I don't know why people want to be the same no, it would be boring.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's right, that's right. Um, you are going to come back. I've already thought of like two or three episodes.
Speaker 1:We're gonna come see you. We're gonna come see you in new. You're in sydney, but we're like, yeah, we love to travel, you're in sydney, right yeah, I'm about um two hours south of Sydney. Is that closer to Melbourne?
Speaker 2:No, melbourne's like further down probably.
Speaker 1:Oh, is it further Okay?
Speaker 2:From me it's about an eight-hour drive, oh is it that far.
Speaker 1:Usually I just hop a plane, so yeah, so it's on the coast.
Speaker 2:It's on the coast.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:And it's just south of Sydney. So, yes, it's exactly where I am.
Speaker 1:We will visit you one of our favorite places in the world. Like top three, top three. One of the top three places to visit in the world is a little known island in new south wales, off the coast uh, off the coast of sydney, by the name of lord howe island, lord Howe Island. It's a two-hour prop jet ride.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It's a part of New South Wales. It's a little island, six miles long, two miles wide, non-commercialized.
Speaker 3:Love it.
Speaker 1:It is like you kind of get this idea of what Hawaii is like right.
Speaker 1:Or very iconic, this idea of what Hawaii is like, right, or you know, like very iconic, like I would compare it to Hawaii 80 years ago or a hundred years ago, where there's no, there are no commercial hotels there. There there is. There, there's commercial, there's commercial activity going on, little little, little little hotels, little motels kind of a thing. Only 400 beds on the island can be filled by guests at any given day, so it's very limited. The food is amazing from these little restaurants. There's no rental car agencies. You rent from Bob or Jim or you know we.
Speaker 3:We actually rent bicycles there for $10 a day and snorkel gear six beaches Um every beach has different, like coral and fish and everything. It's absolutely incredible. It's paradise.
Speaker 2:I'm just looking at it now. I 've actually never heard of it, but that's okay, I'm actually just looking now. What made you go there?
Speaker 1:Well, I was taking the business trip. I don't know how we went in 2019, right? I don't remember. I think we went.
Speaker 3:All I have to say is speaking of putting wives first, go ahead Speaking of learning experiences.
Speaker 1:Speaking of learning experiences, so I was taking two of our sons on a business trip. We were doing work in Thailand and then Australia, and we always have some business and do some play right, and I was like what should we do in Australia? So I started looking things up. We were going to be in Sydney and I saw Lord Howe Island popped, popped up and I'm like this is amazing. I should. I'm not taking the boys, are you kidding me? I'm going to take my wife. So the boys and I did other things, but but on the subsequent trip I think that the following year, or actually maybe it was later that same year uh, we, we booked I think it was like two nights or three nights or something two nights and three days.
Speaker 1:We were doing a tour, we were in Sydney and we were in Brisbane on business, and then we had a couple of extra days. It was our anniversary month, it was December, and so we booked a couple of days. And I tell you, we landed on this prop jet I don't think one flight comes in a day or something right From Sydney. And as soon as we landed in paradise, like we haven't even seen anything except for the runway and this amazing little Island.
Speaker 3:I'm like even, as you like, just fly over and then start to land.
Speaker 1:It's like yeah, I said I've just made a colossal mistake. We're not staying here seven days. You know it was just a couple but it's just it's. It's just a beautiful, very country club, but, but not not high end country club, but just like old school country club. You know, country getaway kind of a field. There are people obviously who live there full time getaway kind of a feel. There are people obviously who live there full time. Uh, you know the fish. The fish is amazing, the, the, the fillets that they bring from the mainland. The hiking, the private kind of almost private cabana where your beach, swimming with turtles, or going into the uh, the, uh, the hair, the herring pools at low tide, or chartering a fishing boat or mount guided mountain climbing. You can't climb this mountain without a guide. It's like 17 places in one. It really is Non-commercialized, just really super cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's like you already know me. That's exactly what I like in the holiday. As kids, we traveled a lot as children and my dad, all my friends, would go to Disney. Actually, long story short, I actually ended up working at Disney for a little bit but I got to. I got to fulfill my childhood dream.
Speaker 2:But as kids, all my friends were going to like the UK or the States for a trip or Disney and my dad would actually go to the travel agent and say to them where do people, where's safe for children to go? That's all he would ask. And we're somewhere that people don't often go. And he took us to the Solomon Islands for a family. So my dad we'd always go to. We stayed there for like two weeks on this island. That had no power and just the experiences as children. Like we went to Tonga, we went to all the islands, and so all my friends like where are you going for your trip? And go Solomon Islands, and people like are you all right? Like and the amount of? There was myself, my dad and my brother and sister and we all had to line up and I remember the doctor saying this is the most amount of travel, vaccines and drops and things and we had to take malaria tablets. We'd had drops for this we had to have.
Speaker 2:I think I was maybe 14 when I went um and my little sister who would have been, oh, geez, oh, if I was 14 she would have been about three, three and a half. She had blonde, ringlet hair, and so they would hiss at us like or because they, solomon Island, would never see people with white skin and blue eyes and blonde hair, and especially my little sister, come up and just want to touch her and they're all like staring through the fence, like it was just an experience I'll never, ever forget of travelers. Enrichment, but how you describe that holidays exactly. I hate commercialize. I hate going to places that are so touristy. I like to go to a place and go down to the back pub or the local pub or go somewhere that the locals go and get to meet the people and experience it on like a.
Speaker 2:I do like luxurious things too, don't get me wrong oh, so do we yeah yeah, ritz-carlton, baby love the ritz-carlton hey, I like, I like fancy things, but also I like holidays like that, where you get to experience the people and that's just genuine culture. So I'm going to check that out because that sounds magic.
Speaker 1:You'd love it.
Speaker 2:I think I will. We're excited to go back so if people want to find you and want to, you know, connect with you on another level. I know I'm going to have you back, but where's the best place for people to connect with you?
Speaker 1:Theforeveryoungshowcom. So Stephanie and I produce a self-care podcast for women called the Forever Young Show. All about.
Speaker 3:Self-care for the mind, self-care for the body and self-care for finances or the most important things.
Speaker 2:I love that it has been honestly. Thank you so much, what a great way to start the morning of having yeah, of um. I don't know if you can see. Can you see my little puppy in the background?
Speaker 2:I do, I do that's why a lot of the time I was on mute, because my hey, tally tally, she's, uh, my therapy dog, so she comes into the sessions with me. She's 10 months old and she's learning to. She's really great learning to read people and when people need her and, um, yeah, she's a really nice dog. But on the odd occasion when I record a podcast, like today, she was going around the house playing with her squeaky toy, scratching the couch and barking and playing and I was like, seriously, so a lot of the time I had to be on mute. Look at her little face. Yes, I know, I'm talking about you.
Speaker 1:Yes, she's so cute, she's so cute, very, she's so cute, she's so cute.
Speaker 2:Very cute. Just thank you so much for your time and your wisdom and just. I love meeting genuine people. I love meeting people that walk the talk and are in a similar industry to what I am is improving the world and helping people see the light in many forms. It's a real pleasure and I'm glad that we've connected.
Speaker 3:Thank you so much. It's been an pleasure and I'm glad that we've connected. Thank you so much, it's been an honor.
Speaker 1:I've really enjoyed this. Yeah Well, it's been great to make a new friend. That's how I feel.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it has been lovely and yeah, let's book in a time for you guys to come back, because it's just almost be regulars. We're kind of intertwined so much and you guys have so much wisdom and to share and I just love and I know I can learn so much from you too, so I think it's fantastic well, the feeling's mutual.
Speaker 1:Thank you, barbara thank you life is beautiful. Thank you so much for tuning into today's episode.
Speaker 2:I hope this conversation has added value to your self-care journey and inspired positive changes in your life. If you enjoyed this episode, consider sharing it with a friend who might benefit from this episode. Don't forget to subscribe on Spotify or on your favorite podcast platform to stay up to date on future episodes. Your support means the world to me. I genuinely love hearing from you, so please take a moment to leave a review. Let me know which part of today's episode resonated with you the most. Your feedback guides the direction of this podcast and I really appreciate each and every single one of you for being a part of this community. To fall in love with yourself is the first secret to happiness. To find out a bit more about the Studio Chat podcast, head over to my Instagram page, Studio Chat Podcast. Or if you want to find out a bit more about my counselling private practice, head over to Instagram on self underscore care underscore studio. I'm really looking forward to seeing you on the next episode. Until next time, take care of yourselves and keep embracing the journey of self-discovery.
Speaker 1:We'll see you next time.
